#1588 Walking Contradiction

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Danielle, 35, from Long Island, talks about raising her 4½-year-old with T1D and newly diagnosed celiac. With PCOS and possible Hashimoto’s, we dive deep into thyroid talk—and share plenty of laughs.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends and welcome back to another episode of The Juicebox podcast. Hi.

Danielle 0:14
My name is Danielle. I'm the mother of a daughter with type one diabetes who was recently diagnosed with celiac disease. If

Scott Benner 0:24
this is your first time listening to the Juicebox podcast and you'd like to hear more, download Apple podcast or Spotify, really, any audio app at all, look for the Juicebox podcast and follow or subscribe. We put out new content every day that you'll enjoy. Want to learn more about your diabetes management, go to Juicebox podcast.com. Up in the menu and look for bold Beginnings The Diabetes Pro Tip series and much more. This podcast is full of collections and series of information that will help you to live better with insulin. Please don't forget that nothing you hear on the Juicebox podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan or becoming bold with insulin. The episode you're about to listen to is sponsored by tandem Moby, the impressively small insulin pump. Tandem Moby features tandems, newest algorithm control, iq plus technology. It's designed for greater discretion, more freedom and improved time and range. Learn more and get started today at tandem diabetes.com/juicebox the episode you're about to enjoy was brought to you by Dexcom, the Dexcom g7 the same CGM that my daughter wears. You can learn more and get started today at my link, dexcom.com/juicebox,

Danielle 1:49
hi. My name is Danielle. I'm the mother of a daughter with type one diabetes who was recently diagnosed with celiac disease. And

Scott Benner 1:58
you live on Long Island. I do. I do. I didn't mean to, like, pick it out that fast, but whoo.

Danielle 2:06
Oh, that's not a compliment, Scott,

Scott Benner 2:08
I'm the mother. I got it right away. I was like, whoa.

Danielle 2:12
I'm not I'm not gonna mention water, right? That sounds bad,

Scott Benner 2:16
too. Yeah, I would stay away from uh, so your daughter's how old now,

Danielle 2:20
she is four and a half, so she's had type one for a year and a half, and she's had celiac disease for one month.

Scott Benner 2:27
Yeah, after the type one diagnosis, when do you start noticing, like, stomach issues, that kind of stuff? Ah,

Danielle 2:35
no stomach issues at all, actually, until the day that we got the call in last month that her markers were super high. So ironically enough, she has a one to one nurse at her pre K, and she texted me saying, Olivia is complaining of stomach pain. And I got a phone call from her endocrinologist, who said, Well, we got her annual results back, and it looks like she has celiacs. So not fun. And I'll talk a little bit about celiacs if you want. But I'm finding it actually a little bit more emotional even than the type one, which might be a hot take. You know, when she got diagnosed with type one, our belief was we're not stopping the way we live life, the way we eat, the way we travel, the way we enjoy social settings. And now we're realizing, well, now we have to. So for a four year old who is very in tune to her body and you know, is dealing with these devices and life changes in general. This has been quite a journey the last month.

Scott Benner 3:30
I believe I've shared this before, but had I not been with my son without another adult and in a public place when I found out Arden had hypothyroidism, I might have put my head through a wall. Yeah. So, yeah, I know what you mean. Does she have what they call silent celiac? Like, is she doesn't have any, like, outward symptoms?

Danielle 3:48
Well, that's another fun thing. So usually, when they get the diagnosis or celiac, if it's really high markers, some doctors will suggest it's not even necessary that they go in and do a scope, but because last year, she had a completely clean slate, and I've been waiting for this. We'll talk a little bit about my anxiety, I'm sure. But my entire life, even at conception with Olivia, I've been waiting for the other shoe to drop. And I just had this feeling. I had a sick feeling I wanted my husband to be there when I got the phone call, because even though she didn't have any symptoms, I just felt this was coming. So they didn't necessarily say silent celiacs, but when she was diagnosed, they also they wanted you to do the scope, like I said, since she was clear last year, and they also found a polyp, so they now we have an appointment in the summer to remove that. They said a polyp in that area is very rare. Usually they'll see it like in the colon, not so much at the bottom of the esophagus. So now we have to re scope and go in and get that out. Oh, my gosh, yeah. The reason they didn't take it out that day was because she was like, aspirating a little bit, and she wasn't really admitted into the ER, you know, it was like a routine procedure to do this, yeah, so we'll see how that goes. But. Did, the biopsy came back. It was benign. I actually like posted to your group and kind of spiraled about it, and a lot of people made me feel better, good, but it is benign, and it will get removed in July. But what I do want to mention for people maybe listening, who might have, like Silent celiacs or whatnot, her mood this last month, since going completely gluten free. She is a completely different child. She is happier, she is more energetic, and not that I noticed any real issues. I considered her like a typical four year old girl who was sometimes moody and sometimes tired after long days of like being involved with school and dance and extracurricular, but she's so much happier. She looks brighter. It's really reminding me of after the type one. Once we got insulin in her, her eyes got brighter, and I'm noticing that now too, like my husband and I keep looking at each other like she's just so happy. She's full of energy, she's social. She's not having these tantrums for no reason, but we never really had any real noticings of an issue she had, like normal, normal bowel movements. She never really said her tummy hurt, other than maybe if she didn't go for one day. But then she was fine. In ways, I was shocked, but also I felt like something was coming for us.

Scott Benner 6:15
You know, I can't believe that. 10 minutes before I came up here, Arden corralled me and she goes, she's laughing at something on the internet. Then all of a sudden she's making a serious face, and then she's like, I would kill you if you did this. And I was like, what? Who are we talking to? And she says, Look at this. She throws around her phone and shows me this video of this little girl. I don't know if she's like, seven, eight years old, as she's getting older, and she's like, this guy, this father videotaped this kid every time she cried to show her that she looked ridiculous, and then put it together like, I think the girl as an older person, put the videos together as a montage and put them online, and I'm watching it for crying, and then she's in a birthday Park and she's crying, then she's in a subway and she's crying, kids crying everywhere. And I thought I'd give that kid a blood test, I check thyroid, maybe silly. I couldn't believe I thought that, that you just said the same damn thing. And we came up here, and I was like, okay, all right, yeah,

Danielle 7:09
yeah. And like, you know, the one blessing of type one I feel is, if she didn't have this, there's no way that I would have gone to the doctors with, like, this occasional stomach ache, right? Yeah? I mean, she wasn't throwing up. She never, you know, she didn't. There were no real symptoms other than an occasional belly ache. So it's like, who knows how long? And we know it's developed within one year, because last year, like I said, she was completely clear. But you know, this could have gone on for years, so sure. Thanks type one for the screening for that. It's

Scott Benner 7:38
a good perspective to have. Let's go backwards a little bit here, because you are not without your medical issues. No, so I'm gonna start. I'm gonna kind of go back and start with you. So okay, I'm seeing here. PCOS, yes,

Danielle 7:53
Hashimotos. I've been told recently that I don't have Hashimotos. We'll talk a little bit

Scott Benner 7:57
about that. Awesome. How old were you the first time you thought something? It's not working, right? Okay.

Danielle 8:01
So I was diagnosed with PCOS when I was about 17 years old. They it was like, my first time going to an OB, GYN. They did an internal scan as, like a baseline. They saw some cyst. They did blood work. My what is it? AMH, no, not. AMH, I should have written this down. I don't know one level was, like, elevated that was also linked to, like, higher levels of testosterone based on the blood work and the scan and the fact that I was not getting a regular period, they diagnosed me with PCOS then, and I remember, like, all I've ever wanted was to be a mother, so at 17 years old, saying to them, like, is this gonna affect if I can have children? And they just said, like, with the way things are, you'll be able to have a baby, don't worry. So I went on birth control, and then within, like, you know, having relationships in college, I stayed on birth control. I never really loved it. Didn't like how it made me feel, but it did make me have a regular period. Then I was single at like, 23 got off birth control, didn't really get a period, gained some weight, whatever. I just had some issues. But never I'm a hypochondriac, too. So I was always going to doctors, my TSH was always checked. My t3 my t4 no real issues with my thyroid. At that point. I met my husband at 24 so we moved in together pretty quickly. We got married when I was 27 so this whole time we were like, never really careful, and I never got pregnant. Sometimes would get a period, sometimes wouldn't get a period, but was never on birth control since meeting my husband at 24 Okay,

Scott Benner 9:29
can I stop you for a second? What did you not like about being on birth control? Said you didn't like the way it made you feel? Yeah,

Danielle 9:36
I don't know how to actually articulate it, but I felt, I don't know. I don't really know the right word, maybe, like, sometimes more bloated, which might be counter intuitive. I think my hormones felt a little bit off, which I also think might be, like, counterintuitive to what it's supposed to do. I don't know if it was the estrogen. I'm not sure. I just didn't love it. You didn't feel right. Okay, I didn't feel right. And I also just felt like, I don't like. This doesn't feel like a fix to my issues, right? Like, okay, yes, I'm getting a period every month. But like, what is the real issue? What's happening internally? I just didn't love it. And I've always been the type that if I could, like, be on less medication, I'd prefer that, sure. So, yeah, that was that. But then right after we got married at 27 like I said, we were never careful, so I knew we were going to go straight into IUI or IVF need be. And at that point they diagnosed me. They said my TSH was slightly elevated, so I know from you, like you, like under two, and they felt the same, especially for pregnancy. And I think I was like a 2.5 so not terrible, not ideal for pregnancy. So we tried a few rounds of IUI, didn't get pregnant, ended up needing IVF, went through. I don't know how much you know about IVF.

Scott Benner 10:44
Let me stop you for a half a second and ask a question, like you've said, we weren't careful, but if you jumped right to I need IVF, you were more than not careful, right? You were active, yeah. Okay, so you were, that's fair,

Danielle 10:55
yes, okay, yes. That's fair to say actively trying, urinating on those sticks. Of telling me, was I ovulating? Was I not ovulating? So, yes, you're right, actively trying closer to, like, when we got married, okay, and I had all that evidence then for the doctor, when we went in, and I had two failed rounds of IUI, and the doctor actually was able to push IVF for me due to PCOS, I wasn't, like, growing enough follicles. They were saying we needed something more aggressive. I started IVF in March of 2018 with no breaks in between. And my daughter wasn't born until November of 2020,

Scott Benner 11:29
dear. So how was that like? Did you put on weight? Was it unpleasant?

Danielle 11:34
Yes, yeah. So I initially had lost a lot of weight trying to, you know, be in a better BMI level, feeling healthier, which I felt good at. And then hormones are crazy. With IVF, it was just, it was a lot. So it was two rounds of retrievals, which is more painful on your body. The one perk of PCOS is you get a lot of follicles that grow, and therefore usually a lot of eggs. So my first round, they retrieved 20 eggs. None of those ended up becoming my children. We went through all rounds, and none of them worked. My second time with a really great doctor who was like my sixth re, I want to say fifth or sixth reproductive endocrinologist, we got 40 eggs. Geez, yeah, which was crazy.

Scott Benner 12:20
Today's egg prices, that's almost $25

Danielle 12:23
you should know how much these eggs were, Scott, I think they were more.

Scott Benner 12:27
They were more than $9 a dozen. Yeah, for

Danielle 12:31
real, yeah. I know. I can't wait to tell my kids that one day. And then nine of them became like viable embryos, and or nine of them were genetically normal embryos, I should say. And now I have two children. So Olivia was born in November of 2020 and my son, Vincent, was born in March of 22 how pissed

Scott Benner 12:50
were you when the story started coming out of the women going on GLP medicine and then having babies

Speaker 1 12:54
all of a sudden? Yeah, I have heard that. And I Yeah,

Scott Benner 12:58
that would have been like, come on.

Danielle 13:01
Yeah. I do. I wonder. I do wonder, especially because after I had some miscarriages, I also my period became regular at one point. So I do wonder if I would have had maybe that type of help. Could it have aided that? I don't know, geez, but you know, then I wouldn't have my two children that I have. So 200

Scott Benner 13:18
years ago, they would have called you a witch and dunked you in a tank or something. Listen, I say stupid stuff all the time on here, but like, what women go through, especially ones that struggle with stuff like this, I have so much compassion for it's my heart to hear all of this, starting from when you're younger and you know, your periods not being right, your testosterone is off. You already know you're gonna have trouble having kids. Like, it's a thing you want. It's you know, it's a goal for you. There's nothing you can do about it, you know, a sit ups not going to help it. Like it's, you know what I mean, like it's not, doesn't feel like a thing you can actually impact. And somebody takes a bunch of money off you to get the eggs and, holy crap. Like it's just, it's a lot, you know, it is a lot. How old are you at this point? The Dexcom g7 is sponsoring this episode of The Juicebox podcast, and it features a lightning fast 30 minute warm up time that's right from the time you put on the Dexcom g7 till the time you're getting readings, 30 minutes. That's pretty great. It also has a 12 hour grace period so you can swap your sensor when it's convenient for you. All that on top of it, being small, accurate, incredibly wearable and light. These things, in my opinion, make the Dexcom g7 a no brainer. The Dexcom g7 comes with way more than just this, up to 10 people can follow you. You can use it with type one, type two, or gestational diabetes. It's covered by all sorts of insurances, and uh, this might be the best part. It might be the best part alerts and alarms that are customizable, so that you can be alerted at the levels that make sense to you, dexcom.com/juicebox, links in the show notes, links at Juicebox podcast.com, to Dexcom and all the sponsors when you. Use my links. You're supporting the production of the podcast and helping to keep it free and plentiful. This episode is sponsored by tandem Diabetes Care, and today I'm going to tell you about tandems, newest pump and algorithm, the tandem mobi system with control iq plus technology features auto Bolus, which can cover missed meal boluses and help prevent hyperglycemia. It has a dedicated sleep activity setting and is controlled from your personal iPhone. Tandem will help you to check your benefits today through my link, tandem diabetes.com/juicebox, this is going to help you to get started with tandem, smallest pump yet that's powered by its best algorithm ever control iq plus technology helps to keep blood sugars in range by predicting glucose levels 30 minutes ahead, and it adjusts insulin accordingly. You can wear the tandem Moby in a number of ways. Wear it on body with a patch like adhesive sleeve that is sold separately. Clip it discreetly to your clothing or slip it into your pocket head now to my link, tandem, diabetes.com/juicebox, to check out your benefits and get started today. When

Danielle 16:08
I was going through IVF, I was from 27 and then she was born, I was like 30 and a half.

Scott Benner 16:14
Oh, gosh, mid 30s now. Oh yeah, I'm 35 geez, yeah. So it just seems like a lot. And it seems, I mean, listen, the world's not fair and all, but like, come on, it just go ahead. I'm sorry. I don't know. Like, I think it's because Arden has PCOS. It like, bothers me a lot, you know,

Danielle 16:32
I understand. I understand. And I also worry about, like, now my daughter, who has now type one and celiacs. It's like, is she also like, you know, I have no idea what either of those diseases feel like in your body, I could imagine. I don't want to project too much onto her, but it's like, I think of how I felt with just the PCOS and that struggle. And it's like, now, if she also has that on top of it, right? Yeah, my thyroid, who, which has been like, up and down, I just, it's really hard, but I try not to project my insecurities and my World Vision onto her, but sometimes in the quiet of my mind, when I think of everything I felt without type one and celiacs, it's hard to imagine her. And, you know, 1015, years, yeah,

Scott Benner 17:13
no. And I think one of the things you're it will stick in your head, it sticks in mind is that thing that you mentioned earlier is like, look, I didn't think there was anything like particularly off about her behavior, and now, like, the kid's not eating gluten anymore, and she's a different person, exactly, you know. And so how many other things I think about this all the time? Like, how many ways are we that we wouldn't be if our chemistry was right? Does that make sense

Danielle 17:38
all the time? I think that all the time, like her baseline. I don't even really know, without all of these I often wonder, what type of mom would I be if all these things didn't enter our life, right? But then also, what would my body feel like without these issues? What would her body feel like? So yes, that's the thought that I have all the

Scott Benner 17:56
time. Yeah. Well, I guess in the end, you look at people who don't have struggles, and they don't seem to appreciate it at all. So maybe you would just just be a dick, would be running around not appreciating all the good health that you had. Who knows,

Danielle 18:07
maybe I don't know, you know, she's also just been like scathing on bi since, like, day one. I got pregnant on March 17 of 2020, and that afternoon, like, the American reproductive society for medicine shut down all transfers. So, like, all elective reproductive procedures. So like she was transferred, say, at 10 in the morning, by 1pm they made that announcement. I also was pregnant with two embryos, like they saw two viable or two sacks, gestational sacs and yolk sacs, and then I miscarried her twin when she was born. She had shoulder dystocia, like she could have. There could have been a lot of issues there. I just feel as though this girl is like a miracle, and has been like skate, literally just getting by from day one.

Scott Benner 18:54
Are you telling me that because of COVID, they were shutting things down and you just got it done, elective

Danielle 18:58
procedures, correct? That's right. Okay, wow. And transfers are considered elective in under the wire, under the wire. When I was getting scans, then I was like, the only one left in the office, say, early April of 2020, because everything else was like, shut down, you know? And my doctor was like, I don't know how much longer we're gonna be open. Like, I might have to do a scan for you, like, behind a target, joking, obviously, but I'm like, what is happening here? You know, it was just, and you know, that was my first time getting further than six weeks in a pregnancy, and it's like that in itself. I was so nervous, like watching every day the news Cuomo watching, like everything tick up with the deaths, and here I am, like, growing a new life. It was just, it's just been a lot. It's been a journey from day one.

Scott Benner 19:40
Yeah, are things I was gonna ask if they feel settled now. But I think this not really right between this diabetes, the celiac

Danielle 19:48
Well, Scott with diabetes, I had just said to my mom probably a week before she was diagnosed with celiacs, like, I'm so excited again. Like, I feel happiness again. I haven't felt happy in so long. I feel like. Piece, I feel like we know what to do with her type one. We're going to the conference in Disney in July, and I was just felt like, so excited for everything, for life again, because I really have struggled with my mental health since she was diagnosed. And then this entered, I'm like, what is happening? Like, I don't know. I just have to keep pushing through. I

Scott Benner 20:21
guess I'll say something that'll get me in trouble with somebody. But now you know what it's like to be married to a lady. You're bad. Everything's fine. Today seems good. Why am I getting yelled at? My husband's

Danielle 20:33
definitely gonna crack up when he listens to that part. Yeah, no, you're right. Maybe I don't know. It's just life is unpredictable, but I do try to kind of put things in perspective. And she's kind of like my model for everything. She is so adaptable and resilient. And she'll just say, like, is this gluten free mom, or can I have this? Will this hurt my belly? And she kind of just goes on. And when I look at her, I don't get as sad, because I feel like she is adapting. But when I think of like another body system of hers that's now impacted that, like, turned on itself. That's pretty heartbreaking.

Scott Benner 21:05
Yeah, I look at it two different ways. I feel you about, like, you know, she's young, and maybe she'll just grow up not eating gluten, and she won't really think much about it. And, you know, hopefully that'll be the case, but at the same time, when systems start, like failing or, you know, attacking each other, or something like that. Like, it's hard not to think like, this is going to keep happening exactly, you know, like, and maybe it won't like, maybe this will be it type one celiac that'll be that, right? Or maybe, you know, you'll wake up and it'll be Hashimotos, like, 10 years from now, or something. And it just, the problem is, is you're never going to be able to completely forget about it, and it's always going to be in the back of your mind a little bit. You have to find a way to deal with find a way to deal

Danielle 21:43
with that. It is hard. And, you know, I'm very like, hyper vigilant in nature, and I'm very like, I think, in catastrophic ways at times. So like this almost feels like it confirms for me that, like it's my brain is right in thinking like this, like I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop, but like, the other shoe does

Scott Benner 22:02
keep keeps dropping. You're like, she's paranoid, and you're like, I'm not paranoid. I'm

Danielle 22:06
ahead of the curve, right? I mean, I remember in before. I don't know if we're gonna go back to the diagnosis story, but like, two weeks before she was diagnosed, I knew it was me who kind of found it, and I was sending things to my husband. He's like, there's no, like, we don't have any type one in our family. There's no way that this is it. And like, I knew in my gut, I just, I was like, This is not normal. This is not normal. She has this disease. And even when I called my doctor at first, it was kind of dismissed, until I started really pushing. So I just feel like it's me who finds everything too. Even with IVF, I wanted to get added, I wanted to add cytomell. I don't know if you're familiar with that t3 medication. Yeah, sure. Oh, she does. Okay. That was really, I think one of the things that helped me get pregnant with IVF. They basically say that cytomol helps speed everything up. And in those early days of pregnancy, it was able to, like, speed up the cell division for the embryo, was the thought process. But I had to find a doctor in Seattle who was willing to prescribe that to me, because none of these endocrinologists in New York, Long Island or city based were willing to prescribe me 25 micrograms, micrograms of cytomol. Yep,

Scott Benner 23:11
I'll talk about that in a second, but I wanted to be there the first day that you told your husband, I'm hyper vigilant, because I think he would have said, is that what we're calling it, that was the nicest way anyone's ever said to me, I'm very type a Scott, I might have a problem. You were like, I'm hyper

Danielle 23:26
vigilant. You know what my husband always says whenever I have to call for something like a 504, meeting or just like customer service, he'll just laugh and say, like, I feel bad for the person on the other side of the phone, because I get what I

Scott Benner 23:40
want. Whoa, so t3 like, so I count us very lucky to have Arden endocrinologist. Right? This woman has been, you know, she's been on the show, Episode 413, she discusses everything about thyroid issues. She's lovely. And, you know, met her originally because Arden was struggling with things, and we were going, I mean, we're going to chop like, you know, not a small Children's Hospital, and Arden's got thyroid issues, and then one day, she starts having real problems, like she's, like, shutting off, you know, she'd come home from school fall asleep face down on a countertop. I've told this story probably 10 times, but like, we have so many photos of her asleep on hard objects, disturbing, like the places she'd pass out, like you'd be working in a room she'd come up to talk to you fall asleep on the floor. Was this before the hypothyroidism? No, she had so here's what happened. Is that Arden's diagnosed with hypothyroidism, they give her medication, and things are good, then suddenly she starts developing these symptoms of, like, falling asleep, lethargy, like, really, like, and instead of someone, it would have been nice if any of us thought of it, but instead of someone thinking, oh, you know, Arden has gained a significant amount of weight since we. Put her on this thyroid medication, because Arden was also, she was the smallest kid in her friend group. She might have been the smallest girl in her school. And today, Arden's like, five, seven, weighs 130, pounds, wow. And I think she started growing when we gave her the thyroid medication. Interesting. That makes sense. But then she gains, puts a lot of weight on and not bad weight, like good weight, but like, she puts on all this weight, and no one ever says, you know, she might need more of this thyroid medication than we gave her the first time, because, you know, she weighs poor now. So we skip over looking at her thyroid dose, which I still beat myself up about. I mean, I figured it out quickly enough. But after I was at, like, a cardiologist, where they're, like, doing DROP TABLE tests on her and stuff like that, because they think there's something wrong with her heart because of how, like, quickly she's just, like, not passing out, but just shutting off, you know, and her blood pressure so incredibly low. And like, you know, she was a, like, a wreck. And like, middle school, maybe. And then one day, it just finally hit me, oh, my God, she's gained a bunch of weight. We haven't changed her dose.

Danielle 26:10
But, like, you shouldn't have to do that. You're not the doctor. Well,

Scott Benner 26:13
you would think. And so then I call the doctor and I say that, and they go, Well, you know, let's keep up with this. She might have pots. She might have this now we're like, I don't know which way we're running. And now you know what I started doing. I just started giving her an extra thyroid pill. Let's see what happens when we give her more. So I started off by giving her an extra one a week, and I was like, okay, and then I ended up giving her, like, I think I ended up starting to give her an extra two a week, and then she started coming back to life. So then I called the doctor, and I said, Hey, I gave her more, and she's better now, so figure out a new dose for and they did that, and we stopped going to all the specialists and everything, and she's okay. But then at some point in the future, it still didn't fix everything, and she was still very tired all the time, and she could just never get rested, like she was never it didn't matter how long she slept, and she'd sleep for fucking ever, and she just wasn't rested ever. So I realized that chop wasn't gonna be the ones. I reached out to a friend of mine who's a doctor, and I was like, I need you to like, like, give me some names of like, forward thinking endocrinologist. And then I started calling all kinds of doctors and asking them all the same kinds of questions, until I got this list of three endos that people were, like, these people are integrative. They're thoughtful. Like, you'll get help with these people, yeah. And I chose Addie. And then I contacted Addie, and she's not taking patience, because she's good and she's full, you know what I mean, and so she's not taking new patients. And then I what they i Oh, I harangued her. Finally, I'm talking to somebody who's gonna know my words. I hopped her in China. You understand Danielle, I got it Okay, all right. And then, but nicely. And then she took Arden on, and then helped Arden. And I said, you wanna help me with my wife too? And she was like, Cool. So then I got her to take care of Kelly. Now, we're lovely. We just texted the other day then, so she's looked at Arden. She said, Well, let's try giving Arden a little cite a mill, which is a thing she thought of right away that not any other endocrinologist was going to think

Speaker 1 28:22
of. Did she stop falling asleep everywhere? Yeah, wow, yeah. She stopped

Scott Benner 28:26
falling asleep everywhere. Turns out, she didn't have pots. She didn't need to be hung upside down. Her heart wasn't exploding. Her thyroid just wasn't managed well, and it looked well, because I don't know if people understand, like you take the t4 it gets your TSH in range, but then your body's not picking up the Listen, I'm not great at describing this, but your body's not picking up the thyroid hormone properly. The t3 helps it pick up the t4 so your t4 level looks right, but without the extra t3 you can't use it correct, right? So, yeah, so we get all that going. Then years later, couple years later, when my son's personality changes on a dime, and we're like, oh, is he gonna turn into a dick? And I was like, could test his thyroid? We tested it, and we kind of got, like, an in between test and missed it once. So it took a couple of extra months, and then the problem is, just like everything else, then he got, like, a worse symptom that made people stop looking at what we were looking at. So in July, we were thinking thyroid, but the testing didn't support it. And by November, he was breaking out in a full rash, wow, hives, actually. And like, we went to, like, a dermatologist, and, like, did all the things they said, and took a couple of weeks. And I've told this story before, but like, he was miserable, like he had to stop. He couldn't work out. He couldn't move. If his body warmed up, he broke up in hives. Wow. He couldn't even laugh, like, if he started laughing, he'd just break out nice. He had to run outside in the winter and just stand out in the cold till his body

Danielle 29:55
cooled off again. Is that an autoimmune thing or what is? Well, I.

Scott Benner 30:00
If you're me and you sit up late at night and dig through enough NIH writings, you'll figure out that it does happen sometimes to people around thyroid, which got me right on the phone with Addie. And instead of having to fight with a doctor who goes, Oh, that's not what this usually is, she's like, boom, throws tyrosine right at him, goes right away, wow, yeah. So all you need is a good doctor and a little bit of, what did you call it hyper vigilance?

Danielle 30:25
Yeah, or my husband would call it something else, but, yeah. So anyway, vigilance, yeah. And Doom scrolling too. You have to do some dooms, right? You have to go through, like, I just, I don't think, as I'm a Special Ed English teacher, I don't think that that should have, like, have to be my job in the middle of the night where I'm looking up symptoms and coming up with all these things, right? Like, I'm not a doctor. I'm not and I know I could, like, piece these things together. But you know, the endocrinologist that I went to last week told me, Oh, your antibodies for Hashimotos have been normal for years. You don't have Hashimotos. I don't know who told you that? And I was like, Oh, well, do you

Scott Benner 30:59
have the symptoms, I don't know, because, wait, you're on the medication.

Danielle 31:05
So, okay, I'm on Levo. Yes, I'm on levothyroxine now, right? Because I was my TSH. We're done having children now, but my TSH was creeping up a little bit. I don't eat poorly. I really don't, and I feel like I should be a lot thinner than I am, and I can't go on a GLP right now, just for, like, insurance things, it's way too much. But I was starting to feel a little foggy and a little like, just off, and I feel like my weight was creeping up a little bit. It didn't match what I was in eating, and just a little tired. So they added in this doctor put me on the levothyroxine with, like, a 2.4 TSH, he's it's a low dose. He'll monitor me every six months, but when he checked the antibodies, they were not there. And when he went back in his records from years ago, they haven't been there. So the only time I had Hashimoto antibodies was around the time of going through IVF. Okay, so he felt but my thing is, I don't once you have autoimmune Hashimotos, you have it

Scott Benner 31:59
right? Like, I don't care about the antibodies. If you have hypothyroidism without Hashimotos, like, you still have the you still have the symptoms Correct. Yeah. And then yeah. So I mean, the fogginess, the weight gain, where's your TSH, now,

Danielle 32:14
what was it, I think, 1.1 Okay, so that's awesome, yeah. So that's fine. I'd

Scott Benner 32:19
also like to point out, now, Danielle, this is a good time to point out that I barely got through high school. Through high school and that you should not be talking to me about this, and no one listening should be taking my my thoughts seriously at all.

Danielle 32:31
But you're on to something. 53

Scott Benner 32:32
days of my senior year of high school, I just went and worked at a sheet metal shop so I could make $4.50 an hour. I mean, if you're listening to me, I know tough and you've run out of options. Oh my god. But I would say like, I don't, I mean, I don't care if it's, call it whatever you want, if I've got symptoms and the medications keeping my TSH down and I don't have symptoms because of it, then right on, then that's what I'm doing. If I'm you

Danielle 32:56
exactly. I think also the doctor might have thought that I had it, because my sister does have Hashimoto. She's always had the positive antibodies, positive Ana. She does not need Synthroid. Her TSH is always at a perfect level. But we both have like, nodules on our thyroid, so there is, like, some symptom, you know, we have to get that monitored as well.

Scott Benner 33:15
Yeah. Well, I mean, if she doesn't have symptoms, I don't want her taking the med either, but, like, exactly,

Danielle 33:19
she doesn't need it. And she she was super fertile. She didn't have any of those super fertile, complete opposite of her sister, but that's okay. But yeah, so I feel like, because there was that autoimmune from her, I feel like the doctors also felt like that. My dad has psoriasis too, so there's definitely some autoimmune in our family? Yeah, sure, but I don't know. I don't I think I just have regular hypothyroidism right now, maybe that's what

Scott Benner 33:46
we'll say, yeah, fair enough. I mean, whatever. I mean, listen, as long as you're taking care of it and it's and you want a GLP, you just your insurance isn't

Danielle 33:53
covering, yeah, I work for the New York City Department of Education, and they will only cover any of those. They won't do any like ze bound or anything. They'll only cover Manju with a 1c I think over 6.5

Scott Benner 34:04
they won't cover it for weight they'll only cover for type two diabetes

Danielle 34:08
for weight correct only for pre diabetes or or type two diabetes.

Scott Benner 34:13
Listen, Daniel, if you have PCOS, don't you have insulin resistance?

Danielle 34:19
I don't think so. I don't know a 1c

Scott Benner 34:21
That's right. 5.1

Speaker 1 34:24
I don't think that's insulin resistant.

Scott Benner 34:27
Okay, sorry, looking for a way, but

Danielle 34:31
we'll see. We'll see. I am trying and losing some weight slowly, but, you know, it just like I said. And I just listened to that episode that you did with Jenny about nutrition, and it's like when I think of what I eat, I should just be much thinner. But I think there are things against me, you know, but I just have to maybe. I had a

Scott Benner 34:46
private conversation with somebody yesterday who was telling me about how they were approaching a neighbor who, you know, just needed, like a GLP. I saw the neighbor again. I'm trying to keep this like vague. Saw the neighbor again and said. What he said was, like, I could see in her eyes that she was on the GOP. They were brighter, like, and I approached and said, like, Hey, you got the GLP. And the person was almost like, how did you know? And they lost a little bit of weight, but, like, everything. And then he went on to say, like, he's like, I listen to the podcast. God, he goes, you have more energy since you've been using telling your voice, yeah. He's like, I can tell listening to the podcast that you're better off this person he was talking to, does the, you know, does the thing that says, like, you know, you hear a lot of people saying, which is like, well, it helped me with my weight, it helped me with my hunger. It helped me with the things it was supposed to but here's another list of things it's helping me with. I just didn't imagine would be happening. And I just think that moving forward, you're going to keep hearing those stories, and like to hear you say, like you're I eat well already, like you listen to Jenny talk about nutrition, you said to yourself, well, I eat like this. Yeah. So if there's other things at play, I almost say, Who cares what they are? Yeah, if you can affect them, then awesome. Like I'm just fundamentally a different person than I was two years ago. I mean, at some point I'll have my wife on to talk about, like, her use of this, like, through thyroid and, you know what it did to her weight over years and everything, and what she's seeing with the GLP, because she'll be really thoughtful about it, but I want her to get through her whole like, journey with it before she starts. I don't want to talk about it in the middle. You know what? I mean, it's just doing things for people. My wife is convinced it's helped her significantly with her long COVID, for example. And the amount of women online who are like, I've had PCOS, I can't get married, you know, like, they like, I have sex with impunity, and I don't get married, and I don't get pregnant, right? And then I start shooting this GLP. And even before I lose a bunch of weight, even I'm pregnant,

Danielle 36:41
it's amazing. Yeah, we'll say it's, I do have, like, a long term goal with it to maybe, you know, try to save up a little bit, and by December, if I still can't lose weight, I'm gonna, I'm gonna try.

Scott Benner 36:51
So we'll see. There's a lot of companies making biosimilars too. Okay, so you'll start seeing them pop up in Canada first in 2026 I think so. I think the patent expires more quickly in Canada than it does in the US. So you'll see the biosimilars will pop up in Canada, and then I think it's, I think it's a number of years before they can come here, at 2030 or 2031 maybe until it's in America. But I mean, still, you know, you've got to imagine that, that more insurance companies will have to, like, start helping you. Like, how much weight do you think you should lose? 40, okay. I mean, that's, that's a significant amount of weight, yeah. Like, people could say, oh, that's not that bad. You're gonna meet me. You'll see me in July. We'll be, I'll be, yeah. Okay, so have you ever met me before? Never. No, okay, the person you're gonna meet in July, it looks completely different than the person you would've met two years ago. And I've lost 60 pounds. 60. Wow, yeah, okay. I say that because I think people hear 60 and go, that's not that much. It's a lot. Oh, definitely, you don't realize until it's happening, like, the places on my body where I was like, well, at least I'm good here. Now I look back and I go, I was fat there too.

Danielle 38:08
So, but yeah, so we'll see. You know what, usually this episode will probably come out like, in five to six months, right? Is that,

Scott Benner 38:15
like, we're on a better we're on a better schedule now? Oh, okay, probably about two months. Probably

Danielle 38:19
okay. So maybe by the time I hear that, if I haven't lost more weight, I'm gonna, I'll make a phone call and say, I

Scott Benner 38:25
want to say, first of all, if it works for you, right? Because I do talk to people who are like, I just didn't do anything for me. But those people are more often either type ones who don't also have insulin resistance. Because, you know, you've heard some of the stories in the podcast of type ones have taken it their insulin has gone way down. Yeah, from what I'm hearing from people, from people, I believe those people are type one, and if they didn't have type one, they would probably be pre diabetic too, like, they would probably, like, show up as having insulin resistance. So it's helping those people, for sure, right? And it's helping people lose weight, which you know could then, if you were overweight in type one, but didn't have insulin resistance, lost weight. I think you would see your insulin go down as well. So there's a lot of different pathways to it helping you, but I've also seen it like not help people at all. Like, or some of them don't figure out how to traverse. Like, if they get a GI issue from it, or something like that, then you know, and you know somebody listening is going to be like, I write a story about a lady whose stomach explosion. Stomach exploded. Like, I'm sure there have been people who have had terrible outcomes with every medication on the planet, but I think that, you know, there are some things that just happen. The people don't get enough advice on how to, like, tough through, like, not like, real, like, horrible, like, you know, irreversible medical issues. But like, some people get real constipated, or some people get, like, goes the other direction on them, and they don't know how to, like, manage it and get through it till their body kind of adjusts and and the other thing I would, I've, I've said all the time, like, like, it took me 50 years to get in this shape. Mm. I put a lot of food in my body that probably wasn't good, and did a lot of things it wasn't good, and everything. And, like, I didn't mean, what do you expect to come out? Like, daisies, you know what I mean? Like, the horribleness is going to come back out again. So, like, it's

Danielle 40:13
true. Well, a lot of things too, I've learned to, like, think about food differently also, since her type one and celiacs now, especially, like so many of the things, well, I feel like I've been over compensating, especially since the celiacs, because I feel the sadness, like, for example, she goes to softball, and there's always snacks after, and if she can't have something there, I feel like I want to have, like, a nice replacement for her, you know. So I'm almost trying to, like, overcompensate or be over indulgent, where I'm like, this isn't even really food, like, it says bio engineered on the packet. Like, probably not the best thing for her. And she's such she prefers such healthy food. She loves her berries. She loves cucumbers, like, cucumbers and any type of dip is, like, her favorite thing to have. She gets excited for, like, I don't know, like turkey pepperoni and peppers on it. So it's like, I'm trying to think, like, Oh, I feel like she's being left out by not being able to have the regular Doritos, which, let's face it, what are Doritos, right? Like, even listening to, I don't even know, Jenny, speak, like, that's what is that? Really? What is that?

Scott Benner 41:14
I don't know what they are, but they're awesome. They are pretty awesome. But

Danielle 41:19
like, then you know what like my husband will make. He is actually like, carnivore. He had lost like 60 pounds, and is like in the best shape that he's been in then. He really just likes, like, steak and eggs, which I know might be controversial for some people listening, but his numbers have never been better. He's off his heartburn medication. He feels more energized. His knees don't hurt. He's like, he's almost 40, and says he feels better than he did ever. He also doesn't drink anymore. He used to be a big drinker, yeah. So, I mean, he thinks of food just as, like, these whole foods on like, the perimeter of the food store, and that's what we really have in our house. But since to see, like, I'm like, oh, maybe we should try this, like, gluten free brownie. And my husband's like, You're making it worse. Like, now we're feeding her almost like, unhealthy foods, because you feel bad that her peers are able to have Doritos and she can't, you know, so there's a reframing I have to do. I think,

Scott Benner 42:09
yeah, I understand how you get caught up in that. I understand why anybody gets caught up in that, but at the same time, like, who cares? I know I would be a hypocrite if I said otherwise. Like, because when Arden was younger, I would tell her all the time, like, our first thought is your health like, so if somebody's uncomfortable with you getting an injection or changing your pot or something in public, that's too bad, because your health comes first. If you meet a kid and they're mean to you and that makes you feel like you're not going to take care of yourself as much, then we don't talk to that kid anymore, because your health comes first. Like, we put your health first and and you, I mean, you know what's happening to you, like Jenny and I are talking about it, and it's despicable on some levels, but like, you're just being marketed to with colors and flavors and tastes. It's just somebody just wants your money, that's it, and they're taking it from you. Because I don't know what that stuff is sprayed on, whatever that thing is, but those Doritos are awesome and whatever else. Like, you know that fear of missing out, or I don't want to be different, like, you know what? If being different means healthy?

Danielle 43:09
Well, that's my thing is, like, it's so ironic that my daughter has two chronic diseases, and when I looked at what her peers eat for lunch, or even before she had type one, she went to this pre K class, and all the teachers always mentioned, like, she has the best lunches, and that's what she wanted. You know, this was before type one, before insulin even entered our lives. And I feel like she does. She's always liked really healthy whole foods. Why do I have to negate that? Because I feel bad, like I think almost the outside world or these other parents might think, Oh, like that, poor girl. She's unhealthy. She has these two diseases where it's like, if food could be like our medicine, which, in many ways, I think it is right, and how we nourish our body. She's really healthy. Why do you care what they think? I don't know. I'm messed up. Scott, I don't know it's I'm in therapy too, I have a lot of issues. I have a lot of issues with like food and diet culture and like yo yoing my whole life, and just fat

Scott Benner 44:10
when you were younger, or drawing attention to your weight, also

Danielle 44:15
feeling more like self worth when I was thinner and got attention like both from, you know, boys or girls, like just feeling valued and valuable when my body looked better. So I don't know, and I feel like maybe because I'm not 100% happy with how I look and feel right now, it just feels and let's face it, type one is so misunderstood, and celiacs is misunderstood as well. People make it like it. No, they don't think it's that big of a deal. No, of course it is. Yeah. So again, that hyper vigilance, or like me having to, having to justify things I don't know at 35 I really shouldn't care as much. I really shouldn't, yeah, and I should just pack her the things that she likes. She's like, loves when I give her strawberries with a little bit of like, Cool Whip to dip in. That's her favorite snack. So what? Why do I need to buy like, this gluten free brownie that's, like, dense and kind of gross and hard to Bolus for and, like, I don't know. So it's something I have to work on. I have to just give her the choices. And,

Scott Benner 45:11
yeah, I don't know. I mean, it's a hard it's the struggle that, like me, you're seeing it with the celiac you hear people talk about with diabetes too. Like, I don't want them to miss out. I don't want it to be different. I don't want to. I'm like, I don't even know why that matters. Why that matters. Honestly. Like, no, I don't. Why does it matter? But if it does, it does. Like, if you're having that kind of struggle, then you're having it. You know what I mean? Like, everybody can't, like, I don't give a what people think, yeah, but like, I can't give that to you if

Danielle 45:35
it was me, right? Like, I don't look at my co workers lunches and think, like, Oh, that's so nice that she's having that bagel, or she's having that wrap, like, I make what I want to eat, and I feel good eating that, right? But when you're four, and she'll tell me, like, oh, this kid brought in that snack, or this kid had this nice sandwich, or this person's allowed to buy school lunch, it's like, you want your kid to be able to be to feel comfortable fitting in, right? Like as a 35 year old, I don't need to fit in. Maybe as much.

Scott Benner 46:04
Stop yourself for a second. Does she not fit in? Well, she

Danielle 46:08
has friends and but she will come home and say those things like, oh, all these kids got to buy lunch. Can I buy lunch so in the beginning of the middle of the year, which, let's face it, Scott, school lunch looks disgusting, disgusting. And the lunches that I make are so much nicer. But I think she thinks it's cool when the lunch ladies like, drop it off at their class, all the kids get excited. So we were letting her buy lunch. Like, once a week. Is

Scott Benner 46:32
she too young to help her? Like, can't you just let her feel snobby about it? Be like, listen, those other kids are morons, you understand, and we're way ahead of them. Like, do that thing. And I don't think that, by the way,

Speaker 1 46:42
she's, like, she's the sweetest girl she I couldn't do that. You

Scott Benner 46:46
don't want to pit her against everybody else.

Danielle 46:49
No, but we did go to a birthday party recently, and I had it was the first time I had to bring the gluten free pizza and a separate cupcake. So we went to this bakery near my house that has, like, really nice gluten free cupcakes, and a few of the kids near her wanted her, so that was cool, but I don't know. I don't know. I think it's just these things are important in elementary school, and she does fit in. She has good friends. We have a great family, good support system. She's a happy girl. It's my own projections. It's my own issues with with food and

Scott Benner 47:17
down that hyper vigilance a little bit there

Danielle 47:20
I do well, I was turning it down, Scott. I was so excited for Florida, and I was like, just feeling like, you know, you don't know, because you never had a baby, but like postpartum, like haze and like, exhaustion is a real thing, right? And each time I got out of that, I felt so good, like I felt I was getting myself back. And with, I'm telling you, in March and April, I felt like I was getting myself back after type one. And I do feel kind of pulled back in, because with celiacs, the hyper vigilance of cross contamination is intense. So it's not just having access to gluten free foods, but it's making sure that other people aren't, you know, touching the food with gluten. So I'm now having I was chill for a little bit, and now I'm back with my hyper vigilance.

Scott Benner 48:03
I like that. I'm so feminine that you were like, You know what it's like, Scott, after you've given birth, and you were like, oh, no, wait, maybe he doesn't, but it sounds like he does when I'm talking. Oh, I took it as a compliment. I just want you to know I was complimented

Danielle 48:16
by it. Oh, that's funny. Well, I just I listened to that episode that you like pregnant Kate Winslet. So pregnancy, and why is

Scott Benner 48:23
everyone bringing that up recently? I'm getting a lot of that online. By the way, pregnant Kate Winslet is hot. Like, let it be. I get

Danielle 48:30
it. Pregnancy is a beautiful thing. It's beautiful. But, um, you know, there is that fog, and I feel like I was really getting out of that fog of type one now, and here we are, but it's okay. We'll, we'll make it work.

Scott Benner 48:41
I'm sure you'll get through this as well, and it won't, it won't feel as omnipresent, and it'll be more of like a background thing for you at some point. Yeah, but, I mean, I take your point. You also have that other kid who's being ignored wholly, right? Scott,

Danielle 48:53
have you heard about, like, glass child syndrome?

Scott Benner 48:57
What? No, what are you saying? Good, well, when

Danielle 48:59
you think of glass like you could see through it, right? That siblings children say, either with disabilities, medical or intellectual disabilities, can often feel like a glass child that their parents have like seen through them to hyper focus on their sibling. And I do worry about that actually. You know, I worry so much about him also developing type one one day, because I almost feel like he feels left out in ways. It's hard. It's really hard.

Scott Benner 49:22
Are you addressing that, or are you just turning the kid into a vase? What are we doing? Exactly? Well,

Danielle 49:29
he's also very happy, and I think he's fine. I mean, the first three months when she was diagnosed with type one, it was really bad. She was diagnosed in December of 2023 and I always think of he had this, like, adorable blonde, bleach blonde hair, and it was for a really short period of time until it got darker. And it makes me think of when she was diagnosed, because he had that. And like, I feel like I I didn't see him. Like, I look back at pictures, I'm like, I don't even remember what he was doing. One time, I had to call the endocrinologist because she wouldn't, her numbers wouldn't come down. And. I heard him fall down the stairs. He was like, hysterically crying. It was awful because I just wasn't present for him. Now, I would say we've really adapted to type one. It is just kind of part of our life, and I think I heard it once on the podcast. It's like the annoying cousin you have to bring along, right? Like it's not ruining our days, but type one is always there, being brought along. But he's happy and fulfilled. He loves school, and he's fine. I am we are seeing him now, but I would say those first three to four months were

Scott Benner 50:26
pretty bad. How many days a week are we going to therapy?

Danielle 50:29
Just why do you think i should i up it? Should I outfit?

Scott Benner 50:32
We do. I don't think two would hurt.

Speaker 1 50:35
I do. I do it every other week.

Scott Benner 50:37
I don't think that's enough.

Danielle 50:41
That's funny. She's actually my therapist has a child with type one. That's funny. She might listen to this and be like, Thanks, Scott. I'm gonna bring in more money,

Speaker 1 50:50
get another co pay. I know I see it,

Danielle 50:53
it's a lot. I don't know. I just, I'm very like, meta of how I think about everything. But my son is happy. He's not a glass I don't think he's a glass child. I don't know,

Scott Benner 51:02
listen, I didn't think that about my son, but He it affected him. Like he talks about it as an adult. He's like you were, and it's, by the way, the amount of time and effort we put into him while he was saying it, it was almost hard to hold it inside not just be like, Are you kidding me? I take his point like, you know, like, no matter what you do, he remembers the other

Danielle 51:21
thing, you know, what we make, either the same mistakes our parents made, or we make new mistakes. And I just read a book recently called anxious people, actually, but it wasn't about anxiety so much. Our kids always remember the things that we didn't do. Unfortunately, no,

Scott Benner 51:35
it's funny, because we sat with him and we were like, listen, I hear that. That's how you feel. And, you know, we discussed about, you know, why some of that stuff was necessary. It wasn't like, it wasn't lost on him, why it was necessary even. And I said, But Cole, like, you know, you and I, like, we went around, like, the East Coast, playing baseball, like on weekends, we were gone sometimes, like the entire weekend and evenings and nights. And I'm like, you played baseball in college. I with every one of your games, like there's no gap where this didn't happen. And he's like, I know, but it just feels like we were always dealing with something for Arden. And then if you talk to Arden, she's like, you know, we were always at baseball for coal. And I was like, Oh my God, you know, I should have put you all in the garage and started the car. There's no way out of this. Apparently it's

Danielle 52:21
really hard. It's just really hard to be a good parent. I mean, my kids are only four and three, but I already feel like, am I messing them up in some ways, or probably.

Scott Benner 52:29
I mean, after talking to you for 50 minutes, I think you are, for sure, but you're funny. Let me ask you a question, because I find this always to be interesting. Around therapy and people are struggling with things, you are crystal clear about all the things you're doing that you don't want to be doing. It's not like you don't know what they are. What do you mean? Well, like, I don't want to use the gluten free as an example. Like, why am I giving her a bunch of food she shouldn't have just so that she won't feel like, you understand the whole problem intellectually, yeah, why are you doing it? I

Danielle 53:00
don't know. So do you think that I should just pack like, strawberries for herself? I think you

Scott Benner 53:04
should just listen to yourself talk and then do the things you say you should do. Okay, all right. Do you know me? Like, who are you arguing with? Exactly? Hmm,

Danielle 53:13
I don't know. Maybe I don't see maybe I don't need so much therapy. Maybe I just needed a podcast episode with you. You

Scott Benner 53:19
might just need the therapist to tell you to shut the up. My

Speaker 1 53:23
husband could do that for me. Well,

Scott Benner 53:25
you're not gonna listen to him because he's an idiot. And I mean, like, right? Like, you're probably mad at him for loving you,

Speaker 1 53:31
aren't you? Oh, my God, no, he's actually past the best.

Scott Benner 53:35
I said that to my wife one day. I was like, Are you mad at me because I like you?

Danielle 53:41
No, I don't know. You know you're right. You're right. Maybe I just need, I am very confident in some ways, with, like, what is the right path, but I do second guess something. So I'm kind of a walking contradiction, actually. But I hear you,

Scott Benner 53:55
I just, I'm fascinated by therapy and by people's, like, the way people think, if you listen to any of my episodes with Erica, you know, like, I'm constantly trying to figure out why people think the way they do, why I do, et cetera. But like, there are some people who go to therapy to get answers because they don't know what to do, then they need a person to lay it out for them, which is fair enough, but you're going and you're telling the therapist, here's all the things I'm doing wrong, here's why they're wrong, and here's the right way to do it.

Danielle 54:22
Well, is it wrong? Is it wrong what I'm doing, I don't know. It's not the healthiest option. In some ways. It's not

Scott Benner 54:29
if you feel like giving that kid strawberries and cucumbers and dip is something that she enjoys, and you're only making her a brownie that's gluten free,

Danielle 54:38
because she will ask for it. Sometimes she will ask for a snack that looks like all right. But

Scott Benner 54:43
listen, I can only go on what you said if you're making that stuff for her, because you think other people are going to be looking at her weirder. You don't want her to feel left out, but she doesn't feel left out, then it feels like you're making the problem.

Speaker 1 54:56
Yeah, right, you're right.

Scott Benner 54:58
No, trust me, you're high. Been applauding. So he's in his car right now, and he's like, tell her, Scott.

Danielle 55:05
He's, oh, my God, he's gonna be so mad because he's gonna say, I told you this, Danielle, and you're listening to Scott. Well,

Scott Benner 55:11
listen, it'll make him feel better. My wife's not listening to a word I'm saying, so don't worry about it. Gotta swap. I don't know that doesn't work that way. If we swapped, if we all got divorced and remarried each other, you wouldn't listen to me, and you'd be like, you know, I should have stayed with that other guy. He was so smart. This Scott guy is an idiot. Oh,

Danielle 55:28
my God. Well, you know, that's like another issue that I have that I don't know how much time we have, but, like, one of the things is, I'm very big on making diabetes, like a part of her life, but not her entire identity. And I feel like you spoke with that, like, with Arden a lot. So like, we will go to, like, there's a diabetes family camp in New Jersey that we really like, that we met up with some families that we've become close to over the year, over the year and a half. And like, we're going to Florida, but we're also going to, like, we're actually driving down the coast, so we're going to go to South Carolina and Savannah, and, you know, make it a whole big trip. So it's not only diabetes, and even, like, the Elf on the Shelf, people will say, like, oh, you can get a Dexcom and an Omnipod. And I'm like, I don't want my Elf on the Shelf to have diabetes. I know that sounds silly, but I'm I think the biggest thing is I just want, like, balance across the board, right? Like, I want her to realize that diabetes is serious, and it's part of her, and it's something we have to manage and take care of, but, and we are having trips that also revolve and, like, around meeting people from the community, but that diabetes is not everything, right? It's not like the only part. So okay? And I think that even with the food of like, I just want balance, and sometimes maybe I swing too intensely to some way, so I think I just need to, like, check myself. And I think that's what therapy helps me with, validating. Yeah,

Scott Benner 56:46
listen, if it was 1976 and I wasn't being recorded so that people would then later yell at me on the Internet, what I would tell you is, I think you have to calm the down, but I don't think we're allowed to say that anymore to people. Yeah, I don't not understand why you're revved up. Like, I mean, I think you started revved up, and then all these things have happened. And like, you know, you you outlined it really well. Like, you're, you're waiting for other things to go wrong, because a lot of things have gone wrong. You're trying to, you know, set up a healthy situation for your kid, physically and mentally, which is a lot of work. You're worried about your other kid, you know, that kind of thing. I'm sure you're worried about your relationship too, and your own health is, you know, something that you're dealing with. I mean, weed. Should you try that maybe, like, I mean, I don't know. Like, you really just you're in the middle of this storm, and, you know, you got to find a way to be Zen while it's happening. And I don't know. I mean, I don't know what the hell that is like, but

Danielle 57:40
I don't know. The last time I smoked weed, I was in college and I had a panic attack. So probably not that.

Scott Benner 57:45
Look at you. Even ruining weed.

Danielle 57:50
My hyper vigilance ruined weed. I'm really fun at a party,

Scott Benner 57:55
I don't know, just running around cleaning up empty cups while everybody else is at the Oh, my God, are you please tell me, yeah. Swiffering,

Speaker 1 58:05
no, yeah. Kind of, oh yeah. Kind of, shut up.

Danielle 58:09
No. I really love to read. So that's like, been something I like, I don't know, I was a big traveler when I was younger, so, like, I'm trying to implement some of those things. I don't know. I came out of the womb stressed, and I've just been stressed for 35 years, but I am trying to do things that are like healthy. You

Scott Benner 58:26
have any idea how many times I watch everybody freak out online and I stop myself from going, you guys should all just go have sex and calm down a little bit. My God, like nature gave you a way to relax, and none of you were doing it anymore. Just go calm down.

Speaker 1 58:41
Okay, I'll tell my husband, you don't

Scott Benner 58:45
even need him. I mean, if that's you, know what I mean. So I don't, I mean, I don't, honestly understand. Like, why am I not a person? Why are some people not like that, and some people are and like, it's easy to, like, joke and be, like, calm down. Like, I know it's not that easy. You would just do it, you know. But I don't have any advice, because I don't feel that way. Like I have the hyper vigilance that you have on certain things. I'm a, you know, I'm the kind of guy who, like, digs in and gets doctors to help and, you know, I would go to Seattle to get a t3 crypt if I needed to. You know what I mean? Like, I'm that person, but, yeah, but it doesn't stick to me when it's over.

Danielle 59:23
Yeah, well, it's just true anxiety that I've had or, you know, so that part, that part's hard, but I do want to say you had somebody on a Swiss doctor once who said that somebody with a six, a 1c it could take up to 116 years to develop complications. And we recently her last a 1c test was a six, and I felt like, maybe I should just calm the hell down, because we're doing pretty good. I would like to be maybe a little bit better, but like, like, that's good, right? I mean,

Scott Benner 59:51
it's only a year and a half in, and you just picked up all those extra gluten free foods. Like, I think that sounds like you're doing. Well,

Danielle 59:57
yeah. So I mean, she has like, 75 Percent time and range, we're okay. So I

Scott Benner 1:00:02
would say that the way I think about that has, like, you know, morphed and changed over the years. I think in the beginning, when I was figuring it out, and she was young, and she didn't have much to do with her care, you know, like, you know, pushing the buttons and making the decisions, I knew how to do it. Like, I could just do it. If you put me in charge of Arden right now, I could put her a 1c, at a five, three, probably no problem, right? And it would probably would take me, like, I could probably get it done in two weeks. I could get her averages down in like, two weeks to that, and then I could keep them there. I know how to do it, but that's not how this works. They get older, and they take on some responsibility, and then they've got to learn, and then they've got to get burned out, and then they've got to ignore it, and then they've got to miss a meal, or miss a Bolus, or forget to do a thing. Then they have to be their own person with diabetes at some point. Yeah, so then my expectation has to continue to absorb the new realities that come in and you keep changing your expectations right now, the way I think about it is, Arden's a one season the mid sixes. She's in college, and she takes care of it herself. If you go back and listen to any number of 1000 interviews with people in their 30s or 40s that talked about having diabetes at college, they're all telling you, oh my God. My a 1c was the 10s. I didn't Bolus some days I just took my basal like, blah, blah, blah, like a six and a half a 1c while she feels in control and is learning how to take care of herself better and getting her education and all that other stuff is awesome. Like, do I wish her a 1c was 5.5 Of course I do. And will it be? I bet you, it will be one day, not today, when she's 20, exactly this six and this six, I don't even know what it is right now, but 63646566, who cares? It's a major accomplishment for a person her age, living with diabetes. Yes, I agree. So it'll be this now, and it'll be less later, and probably when she will get pregnant one day, and and it'll be five, and, you know, and then maybe she'll have a baby, and, you know, she'll get tired, and it'll go up to seven, and then it'll come back down again. And these are all awesome outcomes for people, and you have to remember that, like, not that your health should be worse, because other people's might be, but there are plenty of people walking around with type one diabetes, with double digit a one CS, and they're not not trying either, by the way. So six sounds good to me. I think you're doing great, you know. But seriously, you just gotta calm down. Okay, I don't know how to get you to do that, but, like, I mean, I think I've laid out a number of different ways, like, just do them all on the same day and see if you don't, like, just relax.

Speaker 1 1:02:45
Okay, sounds good. I don't know what you're gonna do.

Scott Benner 1:02:47
Your husband's laughing. He's like, she is not gonna do any of that stuff. Yeah, I don't know. One day do you think you have anxiety? Yes, yes, definitely, yes. And you do anything for it.

Danielle 1:02:59
I have never been medicated for it. It's kind of been deemed that, I don't think that that's necessarily the thing that I need. They prescribed like Xanax for when I'm if I ever feel panicky. But that's not the answer either. I took Xanax. I studied abroad in Australia, and I took Xanax one night, and I felt also so, like weird and fidgety. So I don't like I said, I try to not put things in that I don't necessarily need. Yeah, maybe somebody's listening like, No, you do need an anti anxiety medication. But like, when I'm exercising, I've been going for walks every night, like I said, I love to read. I feel good, I feel better. So I'm not always this intense. I've

Scott Benner 1:03:38
seen some people talk about the glps helping with their anxiety. Interesting, because it takes their inflammation down, right? Changes the, you know, you lose fat, so the hormones change. Like, a lot of like, I'd be so interested to see what happens to you if you do that, especially before you go on something like Celexa or something like that. Like, you know what I mean? Like, exactly, I don't know. Like, people are gonna be like, he thinks glps fix everything. I don't think that. I think that I've interviewed a bunch of people who have said some pretty interesting stuff. The one that sticks to me the most is little girl who has bipolar and other stuff going on, and her mom comes on and talks about how they made all these adjustments that really helped with their bipolar issues, but there were still some resonance of it left in different areas, and then they put the kid on a GLP for weight loss. Kid starts losing weight, and a lot of the other bipolar symptoms go away

Danielle 1:04:32
too. I listened to that episode that was intense, right? What if it is

Scott Benner 1:04:36
helping with it, like, what if it is lowering inflammation? And what if anxiety is inflammation? You know, a lot of people walking around on the planet, and so do I who don't have type one diabetes, and I don't hear those people talking about anxiety as much. Maybe there's some hand in hand between anxiety and autoimmune and definitely, you know, you have PCOS, which is, I mean. Inflammation related. Is it autoimmune? Like, you know what I mean? Like, if you had anxiety too, and I don't know, I genuinely have no freaking idea, but you're 40 pounds overweight, you're saying you could lose 40 pounds if you got on this Med, dropped 20 pounds, started feeling better, felt your anxiety lessening, you'd be like, Oh, really, no, you're right, yeah, because, I mean, you're exercising, you're eating well, and you're not getting the results that you want. Like, even that could make me anxious. It could double on top of itself, because, like, I'm doing the things they told me to do, and it's not helping, or it's not helping quickly enough, or whatever. Like, even that could make you feel upset. So I don't know. Can't believe the weed didn't work, though. Tell me what happened when you smoke the weed.

Danielle 1:05:42
So there's like, a summer that I smoked a lot of weed with my friends, and I was totally fine, and I was definitely relaxed. Then we would, like, lay in the pool all day and just, I don't know, probably eat dominoes and smoke weed. But then one time, I was hanging out with my friend and this weird guy, and I felt he was sketchy, like he just gave me bad vibes, and I thought he laced the weed, and I started panicking. And I was like, walking around the Dunkin Donuts parking lot with my friend. I think I was, like, 20 years old at this point. I called my mom, flipping out. I was like, I think I smoked lace weed. Can you come get me? And then I, like, thought I was hallucinating. I took a bath. This is like, a lot to share. No, it's not. I took a bath and I told my mom, like, I think I'm seeing fire. And she's like, you're fine. You're just high. Go to sleep. And I went to sleep, and I never smoked weed again.

Scott Benner 1:06:34
You can buy it in a store now, you know, yeah, actually, uh, yeah,

Danielle 1:06:37
I did, um, then my husband and I went to Colorado, probably, I don't know, maybe I was like 26 and when we like edibles or gummies, and I just slept, that was fine. So maybe I need something like that, but then I don't want to sleep through the sugar pixel, even though sometimes I do, and my husband's like the real MVP. I don't know, Scott, I'm a walking contradiction.

Scott Benner 1:06:57
Yeah, no, no, you definitely are. I wish I could call this episode runs on Dunkin that's awesome. I love the idea of you in like, in what I'm imagining your terry cloth shorts, wandering around in a Dunkin Donuts parking lot being like, I see fire. I'm gonna call my mom and tell her I smoked weed. My

Danielle 1:07:17
friend's like, don't call your mom. Like, no, I'm calling my mom. This is this guy's creepy, and he lays the weed. He's going to try to hook up with us. We're going home.

Scott Benner 1:07:28
The creepy guy because he gave me something. Oh, that's awesome. Your mom was probably at home drunk off her.

Speaker 1 1:07:34
No, she's super straightly. She was just like, Danielle, you're an idiot. You smoke too much weed. Come on. I'm gonna

Scott Benner 1:07:40
guess your mom smoked a bunch of weed too, if that's how she answered it. She answered you don't you think? No, you've never, have you ever answered?

Danielle 1:07:47
Yes, I have actually all of her friends who are, like, big drinkers and big pot smokers in that she in the 70s and she never drank. She was always like, just my mom is, like, carefree in a lot of ways, also anxious, though she would be the only person not drinking, not smoking, and then they the other drunk people would drive. And I was like, Mom, why wouldn't you drive the car if you were sober? She's like, I don't know. We didn't think about it.

Scott Benner 1:08:10
Yeah, it's interesting how, like, little any of that was consumed. Wait, so your mom has anxiety, but she's chill. Where do you get this from? Is your dad? Is your dad up tight?

Danielle 1:08:21
So no, they're both. They're like, weird, I can't explain it. So they're they have, like, anxious energy. That's the only way I could explain it. They're like, buzzing people. Oh,

Scott Benner 1:08:32
I hate that. They feel like they're vibrating when you're in a room with them, yeah? That's probably what made you anxious, yeah? So

Danielle 1:08:37
maybe that's why me and my sister a little messed up. But they're, like, the purest hearts, great people and, like, not super anxious in your face where, like, I'll spiral if I see, like, a beauty mark has changed its shape. My parents, like, Oh, you're fine. Get over it. Like, don't worry. Or, you know, like, nothing is panicky to them like that. But I do feel like they're just, like, high energy. I remember once I went to my husband's house for like, a Sunday dinner, and I was, like, talking so fast, probably, like I am right now, and they were all so chill, and I'm like, What is this energy? Like, what? What is this? Because I'm like, I think I also kind of vibrate in a room. Oh, sorry. Maybe I won't come up to your

Scott Benner 1:09:16
table. I'll be sorry. It's upsetting to me when, like, you're in a room with somebody, you're like, oh my god, are they like, gonna like face through the wall, like The Flash, chill out for five seconds. I mean, I'm a vigilant person, like, I pay attention to things. Like, I, you know, I see what's going on around me. I just don't have like that like thing, yeah? Like, we're

Danielle 1:09:36
like, true bumblebees, like, zizzing throughout, yeah? Like, just a lot, no, can you tell that from my voice? I

Scott Benner 1:09:42
mean, I could tell from the conversation, it's not your voice, it's not your voice the things you're saying. Do

Speaker 1 1:09:51
you want to come to one of our family parties?

Scott Benner 1:09:53
Oh, sure, yeah. I'll come out to the I'll fight over that damn bridge for that. Yeah, right. I. But no, you should definitely say hello in Florida, that would be awesome. I hope everybody does all right, but no, I mean, listen, what are you gonna do? You know what? I mean, like, you, you're talking to a therapist, you're you have some things in line. You're gonna try give it a shot and see what happens. But, you know, try those things before you like, you don't want to devolve into, like, drinking or something like that. Like, because, you know that could happen, happens?

Danielle 1:10:23
No, I know. Well, my husband's sober, so I don't really drink a lot. Good at a solidarity. Yeah, I had a solidarity. I used to love a glass of

Scott Benner 1:10:30
wine. He ruined that for you, too. What other What other things did he ruin for you? Go ahead, make a list.

Danielle 1:10:35
No, no, he really, he's he is the best. Like, when I think of having a daughter with type one and everything he does, and how Zen his energy is, and even keeled, he really is the best father and best partner.

Scott Benner 1:10:47
What I mean? Does he have another option? What is he going to do match your energy? How the hell that'd be exhausting?

Danielle 1:10:53
Don't you think? Well, no, he's just, you know, I feel like a lot of people that I've spoken to feel that they have to carry the burden of type one themselves. Yeah, do a lot of like, you know, and I feel like he really, he knows when it's a site change day. He's It was much better with MDI, and she prefers the way that he puts on the pump. You wonder why? Because I'm buzzing, and he's not, but he's just, I don't know, he's really present. I could think of some people's husbands who would not be the way that he is. Oh,

Scott Benner 1:11:22
yeah, no, that's, that's, it's wonderful and lucky too. I'm imagining your daughter, like that big eye look across the room at your husband, like, Hey, she's coming at me with a pod. Why don't you step in? That's happened?

Speaker 1 1:11:31
She's like, Is Daddy gonna do my pump change? So yeah,

Scott Benner 1:11:36
we were helping Arden with something the other day, and I was like, Look, I can't do it right now. Do you want mom to help you? And she's like, I'll wait. And I was like, okay, yeah.

Danielle 1:11:43
Actually, the dynamic between you and Arden actually does remind me of what my daughter and my husband's will be one day. Because, yeah, I could see that. And I feel like I take on a lot of, like, the emotional part of type one, or like, the school stuff with her 504, and her nurse I do all, like, the prescription refills and doctor's appointments. So he's doing, like, a lot of the he's just, he'll go in with like his, like, light on his head and do the pump change in the middle of the night so she doesn't have to feel it. And he's like, Well, you know, he's really good at cleaning this site and getting all the things to, like, massage her so there's no scar tissue. And if I were to do that, there would be, like, adhesive remover all over and just like a mess, I'm just a mess. You

Scott Benner 1:12:21
were, listen, I'm sure you're not a mess. And I appreciate you coming on and having, like, such a good, you know, vibe. And thank you being so open, and not, you know, letting me joke around with you and everything. So of course, yeah, we'll just call this one Bumblebee, like we're done really, all right, could it be Long Island B? We'll figure

Danielle 1:12:40
it out. I don't really love the like, I think Long Island doesn't have a great reputation.

Scott Benner 1:12:46
Well, I mean, you should not have said the fourth word you said with my mother, yeah. Like, I mean, you were right into it. Like, I was like, Oh God, I gotta get on the expressway

Speaker 1 1:12:54
now. So wait, how do you how do you say?

Scott Benner 1:12:56
Mother, no, it's the way you drew it out. Mother, I can hear it. I mean, everybody can hear it, all right? There's nobody that can't hear it. Listen people west of the Mississippi. Just think you sound like a Jewish person from from New York. I'm not Jewish. I know you. Know you, by the way, you could be. I know you're not like. You're definitely you. I mean, you're Italian, right? Yes, yeah. I mean, so obvious,

Speaker 1 1:13:23
like a Dunkin Bumblebee or something, just no Long Island

Scott Benner 1:13:27
workshop it back at the back, at the offices, the offices, basically, what's gonna happen is Rob's gonna type something in the notes. And that's what I'm gonna that's what I'm gonna call the episode. Sounds good, but no, no, you're exactly who you know. I'm just telling you that for people who aren't from the northeast, like they just hear that accent and they think, Jewish, yeah, yeah, which is interesting, because it doesn't matter. I know you're not, but like, yeah, I wouldn't matter if you were. I feel weird talking about this. Like, I would give a if you were Jewish or not. I don't care.

Danielle 1:14:01
No, of course, it's just like the I don't care about the Jewish part. It's the Long Island stamp that is, like, a little embarrassing.

Scott Benner 1:14:07
Yeah. I mean, I knew you weren't Jewish when you said you were gonna drive down the coast. Oh, self respecting Jew was driving from New York to Florida.

Speaker 1 1:14:17
Yeah, I know. I don't know how that's gonna go. Wish us

Scott Benner 1:14:19
luck. Oh, my God. They're like, please, I take a flight a midday. I want to be there by one so I can have lunch, not doing that. Yeah, we'll see All right, everybody? Mazel Tov, I'll see you guys later.

Today's episode of The Juicebox podcast was sponsored by the new tandem Moby system and control iq plus technology. Learn more and get started today at tandem diabetes.com/juicebox check it out. Dexcom sponsored this episode of The Juicebox podcast. Learn more about the Dexcom g7 at my link, dexcom.com/juicebox thank you so much for listening. I'll be back very soon with another episode of The Juicebox podcast. If you're not already subscribed or following the podcast in your favorite audio app, like Spotify or Apple podcasts, please do that now, seriously, just to hit follow or subscribe will really help the show. If you go a little further in Apple podcasts and set it up so that it downloads all new episodes, I'll be your best friend, and if you leave a five star review, ooh, I'll probably send you a Christmas card. Would you like a Christmas card? You

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