#1552 Scribbling
You can always listen to the Juicebox Podcast here but the cool kids use: Apple Podcasts/iOS - Spotify - Amazon Music - Google Play/Android - iHeart Radio - Radio Public, Amazon Alexa or wherever they get audio.
Three Generations, One Diagnosis — Laura’s Unspoken Legacy of Diabetes and the Son Who’s Breaking the Silence.
+ Click for EPISODE TRANSCRIPT
DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.
Scott Benner 0:00
Welcome back friends to another episode of The Juicebox Podcast.
Laura 0:13
Hey, Scott. This is Laura. Thanks for having me. I am your very first speaker that I emailed you yesterday, talking to you today, I've been listening to you for about six years. My son was diagnosed six years ago in middle school, and I would say I found your podcast within that first week. You are really who grounded me if
Scott Benner 0:41
this is your first time listening to the Juicebox Podcast and you'd like to hear more, download Apple podcast or Spotify, really, any audio app at all, look for the Juicebox Podcast and follow or subscribe. We put out new content every day that you'll enjoy. Want to learn more about your diabetes management, go to Juicebox podcast.com, up in the menu and look for bold beginnings, the diabetes Pro Tip series and much more. This podcast is full of collections and series of information that will help you to live better with insulin. Nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your health care plan. This episode of The Juicebox Podcast is sponsored by the twist a ID system powered by tide pool that features the twist loop algorithm, which you can target to a glucose level as low as 87 Learn more at twist.com/juicebox. That's twist with two eyes.com/juicebox. Get precision insulin delivery with a target range that you choose at twist.com/juicebox. That's t, w, i, i s, t.com/juicebox. Is t.com/juicebox this episode of The Juicebox Podcast is sponsored by Medtronic diabetes and their mini med 780 G system designed to help ease the burden of diabetes management. Imagine fewer worries about Miss boluses or miscalculated carbs thanks to meal detection technology and automatic correction doses, learn more and get started today at Medtronic diabetes.com/juicebox this episode of The Juicebox Podcast is sponsored by the contour next gen blood glucose meter. Learn more and get started today at contour. Next.com/juicebox
Laura 2:40
Hey, Scott, this is Laura. Thanks for having me. I am your very first speaker that I emailed you yesterday and I'm talking to you today. Yes, I've been listening to you for about six years. My son was diagnosed six years ago in middle school, and I would say, I found your podcast within that first week. You are really who grounded me? Are
Scott Benner 3:09
you gonna cry? This is wonderful. I love one listen in the first minute and a half. I'm great and you're crying. Perfect podcast. Keep going,
Laura 3:19
No, I think it's funny. I would say, I'm just trying to break the
Scott Benner 3:23
pension for you. Laura, that's
Laura 3:27
all, no, I know. No, it's really, you're like, almost, this is, like, the counseling session, you know, I don't think very many people that you know have a child diagnosed with diabetes. Always have, you know, an actual, like, real life support system, sure. So that that's kind of what you are for me,
Scott Benner 3:45
oh, oh, this is Oh, you're having, like, a real, genuine moment. Thank you for that. Oh, you're very welcome. Are you hearing me? Okay, I am, I am, are you hearing me? Okay, I am. I just there's a pause, and I don't know if it's because you're because you're upset, or if it's because something's not working. That's all. I just wanted to say, okay,
Laura 4:03
that, uh, it made a little bit of a glitch. Okay, so that was family. That was my emotional part from just my family life. My mom was diagnosed diabetes at 18 years old. She had a pretty rough go about it, go with it. And did pass away at 49 She lived her life without telling anyone she actually had diabetes. Your
Scott Benner 4:31
mom passed away when she was 49 she was diagnosed when she was 18. Ah, yes, wow. And that was how long ago? So
Laura 4:38
I'm 50 now. It was, she died in 9797
Scott Benner 4:44
Oh, I'm so sorry. When you jump on and you start introducing yourself and you get overwhelmed, like, is that because of the connection? Like, is it because we're talking Is it because you're thinking about your mom? What hit you? Right then?
Laura 4:57
I don't always talk about. Like, personal things in my life. So like, this is good. It's not something I don't really talk about it very much myself. Yeah.
Scott Benner 5:07
So in complete candid openness, I was looking at the amount of episodes that we have done, and I felt like I was like, we don't have as many as I like having on hand. And I kind of offhandedly texted Rob, and I was like, hey, you know we're doing all right, right. We have this many episodes. He goes, I wish we had 10 more. And I was like, Oh, me too. I was hoping he would tell me, No, you're fine. So I have all these days held to talk to Jenny and to Erica and to people like that, and we just don't have much of that going on right now. And so I said, Okay, well, let me fill in those dates with like, regular people. Now, most people listening would think, well, why don't you just contact the people who are already set up on the schedule and move them? And the answer is, that would be a lot of work. So I went online instead, and I was like, hey, who can who can record, you know, quickly, next Monday, two Mondays from now. And how about tomorrow? Because I had a person from Australia drop out, and it left today open, and you were like, I can do it tomorrow. And then I have never in my life had someone sign up, and then I recorded with them, 24 hours later. And I'm wondering if by not having time, like, are you more emotional? Because it's happening very quickly, I wonder, will we ever know? We'll
Laura 6:28
never know. Okay, all right, I see, and I would say my mom makes me more emotional than even my son or my dad. So as we continue on, my dad also ended up getting diagnosed. But he got diagnosed around 40 with type one. It's questionable. So he technically got diabetes, diagnosed with type two, but I would say, and probably because of your podcast, you know, within the last like several years, I was like, you know, you really do need to get your you really should be tested. Like, I really think you're type one, and he does have some, some of the antibodies, so I think he's probably 1.5 Yeah,
Scott Benner 7:10
very slow onset. Your mom had type one, and then your dad
Laura 7:14
got it. Yeah, it was a weird twist of fate. How
Scott Benner 7:18
many kids do you have? I have two How many brothers and sisters do you have one sister and your one child is the only type one. But are there other autoimmune things
Laura 7:29
on my husband's side of the family? There is
Scott Benner 7:33
so this was always
Laura 7:37
we thought we had great genes. Personally,
Scott Benner 7:42
those fools.
Laura 7:46
His sister has MS, and she actually has quite a few autoimmune issues. She has. She had Haji motos ms, and then possibly lupus, like she could be our own podcast, wow. And then, and then my mother in law also has, MS, no
Scott Benner 8:02
kidding, your mother in law, and your and your sister in law, they do, oh, gosh, that's a lot. Okay, so your mom has been gone for 30 years. Is that right? Just about, uh, yep. And so she died when you were 20,
Laura 8:15
uh, 22 my math might be a little off, but
Scott Benner 8:19
Laura, do you mind if we talk about that for a minute? Sure. Okay. I mean, what's that like, losing your mom when you're so young? Well, clearly,
Laura 8:27
very hard that 30 years later, it's still she was my everything. So it was, it was tough. She was an extremely positive person. But when, when she was diagnosed, you know, she grew up in a family that was very positive, and just never talked about difficult things. You know, everything is just great. So she was in college, I think she was a freshman in college, and then, you know, whatever her symptoms were, she went to the hospital. She stayed there for a week. They taught her, you know, how to treat herself, and then her family never talked about it again. It was kind of her burden to bear. What was she going to college for? I think just liberal arts. Okay, she was going for her Mrs. She was getting her Mrs.
Scott Benner 9:12
Degree. She's like, I'm gonna find it, yeah, I'm gonna find a handsome boy who also is gonna get type one diabetes, and we're gonna make a little stew for people, and one day, exactly, Laura's kid can deal with it. Exactly. There's a lot here, honestly, though, like, so, so your, your poor mom is diagnosed in college at a time when she needs help to begin with, and no one helps her. No one tell they just send her back to school. And they're like, Hey, you got this. And then we're just gonna smile like robots and hope this is okay
Laura 9:40
Pretty much, yeah, Catholic, yep. Sorry. Oh no. It's funny how they really are. There's stereotypes for a reason. Yeah,
Scott Benner 9:52
I was apologizing to the other Catholics. I figured you've made your peace with it already. Then did you have to do the same thing when she passed away? We used to. Supposed to just all put it in a box and just keep moving.
Laura 10:03
Um, I don't know if I was supposed to or I just did. Yeah,
Scott Benner 10:07
that's what I meant when I said supposed to. So, so you, you just, that's it. My mom's gone, by the way, at the same age that she got her terrible news. You got terrible news, yes, yeah, right. Like, So how old are your kids now?
Laura 10:21
So my 20 and 21 Do
Scott Benner 10:26
you have any weird feelings that the something odds about the befall them
Laura 10:30
more me? No, I don't feel like I'm gonna die, but it's I'm at that age now that I've lived longer than my mom lived. And that's a weird feeling.
Scott Benner 10:41
It is. I mean, how does it feel? Does it feel unfair? Do you feel like you're Are you sad that you're out living her contour? Next.com/juicebox that's the link you'll use to find out more about the contour. Next Gen blood glucose meter. When you get there, there's a little bit at the top. You can click right on blood glucose monitoring. I'll do it with you. Go to meters, click on any of the meters, I'll click on the Next Gen, and you're going to get more information. It's easy to use and highly accurate. Smart light provides a simple understanding of your blood glucose levels. And of course, with Second Chance sampling technology, you can save money with fewer wasted test strips. As if all that wasn't enough, the contour. Next Gen also has a compatible app for an easy way to share and see your blood glucose results. Contour next.com/juicebox and if you scroll down at that link, you're going to see things like a Buy Now button. You could register your meter after you purchase it. Or what is this? Download a coupon, oh, receive a free contour next gen blood glucose meter. Do tell contour next.com/juicebox head over there now get the same accurate and reliable meter that we use. The brand new twist insulin pump offers peace of mind with unmatched personalization, and allows you to target a glucose level as low as 87 there are more reasons why you might be interested in checking out twist, but just in case that one got you twist.com/juicebox, that's twist with two eyes.com/juicebox. You can target glucose levels between 87 and 180 it's completely up to you. In addition to precision insulin delivery that's made possible by twist design. Twist also offers you the ability to edit your carb entries even after you've bolused. This gives the twist loop algorithm the best information to make its decisions with, and the twist loop algorithm lives on the pump, so you don't have to stay next to your phone for it to do its job. Twist is coming very soon. So if you'd like to learn more or get on the wait list, go to twist.com/juicebox. That's twist with two eyes.com/juicebox. Links in the show notes, links at Juicebox podcast.com.
Laura 13:00
It's, it is what it is, I guess, I mean, it's, we're reaching that age. I think you're similar ish in age, sure that there are, you know, I've, I've now known people are known of people that have passed away around this age. And you it's just amazing how much life, you know, my my dad is 78 and just how much more life she missed out on. Yeah,
Scott Benner 13:26
it really is upsetting. I have an acquaintances, parents, I'm trying to be very vague here. And the mom, just like, she just got a headache and died, you know what I mean? Like, and she was like, younger than me. Yeah, it's, it's really, yeah, just insane. It feels insane because, like you said, you feel like, Listen, 50 is older, but in a world where you can live to 80, no problem, it's not that bad, you know, like, so you're like, No, I have a lot more time. And then when it's just gone like that, as horrible as is the loss for your mom. Like, you know what she doesn't get to do? Like, it leaves you in a bad time in your life. Like, that's too young to lose a parent, I think, and not to deal with it too. Like, you've never gone to therapy. You've never talked to anybody about it. You talk to your husband about it, not really. Is he Catholic too. He is not overly religious, but, but he grew up the same way, is my point.
Laura 14:26
And you know, even I guess that goes on to when my son was diagnosed, he actually ended up quitting his job two months later, flat out. But nothing like he hit that wall of, I think he put on such a front of being the strong man that then he cracked. Oh, no
Scott Benner 14:47
kidding. Hey, listen, when you guys have sex, does it go like this? This is very enjoyable. Yes, indeed, it is. Does it go like that? Or
Laura 14:59
no, maybe a. The beginning
Scott Benner 15:05
happening. I want to watch that new Matt locker reboot with that lady. There's the thing no one under 50 even knows exists, but it's just a lot of repression. I mean, I don't mean that like you were probably like, Hey, I just went to jump on the podcast and tell you how great it was. How great.
Laura 15:23
I told you I wanted to just see where this takes you. Okay, all right, so feel free to ask questions.
Scott Benner 15:30
All right, cool. Thank you. I really appreciate you doing this. By the way.
Laura 15:33
I'm trying to be an open book. Well, listen, trying to get rid of all my repression
Scott Benner 15:38
here. Yeah, like, Yeah, let's just let it all go right here. Let it all out. You said he cracked. But like, did he hate his job? And then, like, this thing happened to your kid, and then he was just like, life's too short. Like, was it that thing, or did he just not was he unable to cope? I
Laura 15:53
don't really know. His job was very stressful. He worked. He worked long hours. You know, he'd gone through different managers, and his his manager was tougher, and he just couldn't get things accomplished at work. And, you know, it's, it's life, he probably would have kept going. And then one day he started crying in the bathroom, and it was like, something is not right here. Wow.
Scott Benner 16:15
How old was he then,
Laura 16:17
probably 40 ish, he'd worked at the same company for 25 years. It was his very first job out of college. Wow. But I was just, I think, I think it was about two months into my son's diagnosis, and I literally remember, you know, you just start catching your breath and being like, Okay, I got this. I, you know, Skip,
Scott Benner 16:37
he's crying in the bathroom, and you're like, Oh, good. The one I got is broken.
Laura 16:45
I literally remember driving and thinking, You know what? I'm blessed. We have, you know, my husband has a good job. We have good insurance. You know, things could be much worse. And then he came home and he's like, can we have a little conversation outside? You're like, great, you're gonna leave me god,
Scott Benner 17:02
he's been the girl up the street. Jesus Christ. Like, I bet you wished he was having sex with someone else when he started crying, right?
Laura 17:13
Yeah. I mean, he's always, like, the strong one. And clearly, I'm I am more emotional better. He asked permission. He didn't just like, say, I quit my job, but his permission was, I can either stay and be dead in like, five years or quit my job. Were
Scott Benner 17:30
you like, oh, well, we do have some life insurance on you, so I guess that's fine. I tell my wife all the time, like, you get back in there until you die, exactly.
Laura 17:39
So it all worked out. I mean, he he actually has a much better job now and is happier. He didn't
Scott Benner 17:45
start playing the bong like the bongos and smoking weed. He went looked for a different
Laura 17:49
job. He took the summer off. So, and we had, we had enough savings. We knew where, you know, how long we could go, yeah. But had to, you know, figure out the whole Cobra thing and, oh yeah, because
Scott Benner 18:01
your kid just had got diabetes exactly, you're like, you want to quit now. How about next summer? Kind
Laura 18:09
of, I mean, on a positive, we'd already had our out of pocket Max.
Scott Benner 18:16
There's a thing that people who live with diabetes, they just talk about every year like, it's the most like, oh, the out of pockets over this is wonderful. Seriously, like he takes you outside. You're like, Oh, God, he's gonna leave me. He's not gonna leave you. He's crying. He wants to leave his job. What's your first reaction? Are you worried about him? Are you worried about your family? What happens first? I'm so interested.
Laura 18:35
I would say I was worried about his health. Okay? For him to come to me with that was a lot, you know, yeah, you go through a lot of things while married, and I knew he needed it. He like he he would not be coming to me, asking that and showing weakness unless he really was in a dark place
Scott Benner 18:57
five seconds before the porch meeting. Can we call it that porch meeting? Maybe that's true. My God, your episode might be called porch meeting. Five seconds before that, could you have guessed this about him? No, not at all. What has that taught you, Laura, about holding your feelings inside? Not a goddamn thing.
Laura 19:19
I don't know. I mean, I think everyone has their own coping mechanisms, and I'm talking to you, so I'm letting my feelings out in
Scott Benner 19:29
my personal life. Maybe this is problematic too, like it probably is in some way, there's nothing bothering me that the people around me are not aware of. If I were to say something to my family right now that they had never heard before, they'd be shocked, and I don't have anything to say that. They don't know. There's a lot of silence. Are you processing that? Or did your headphones stop working? Today's episode is sponsored by Medtronic diabetes, who is making life with diabetes easier with the mini med 780 G system. The mini med 780 G. Three automated insulin delivery system anticipates, adjusts and corrects every five minutes. Real world results show people achieving up to 80% time and range with recommended settings, without increasing lows. But of course, Individual results may vary. The 780 G works around the clock, so you can focus on what matters. Have you heard about Medtronic extended infusion set? It's the first and only infusion set labeled for up to a seven day wear. This feature is repeatedly asked for, and Medtronic has delivered. 97% of people using the 780 G reported that they could manage their diabetes without major disruptions of sleep. They felt more free to eat what they wanted, and they felt less stress with fewer alarms and alerts. You can't beat that. Learn more about how you can spend less time and effort managing your diabetes by visiting Medtronic diabetes.com/juicebox,
Laura 20:56
processing. I mean, I think I'm a happy person. I don't, I don't think I'm a closed book. But I definitely probably am more reserved. And this sounds like after several years, you psychoanalyzed yourself. One, I think I do cry easy, clearly, and because of that, well, one, where my mom wasn't open, I almost overcompensated personality wise, that I wanted to be able to demonstrate to her I could handle everything. You know, I do take a lot on. You know, someone does have a problem. I want to be able to listen and be there, right? Because I felt that she didn't trust I don't even know what happened. I mean, quite honestly, my sister and I knew she had diabetes just because you think you can hide it, but you really can't. Yeah, yeah. And my sister, my mom and sister, got in a fight when my sister was in high school, and my mom was like, you you know you're lot, you know you're lying. You can't, you can't keep lying about all these things. And my sister was like, Well, you're a liar, like you lied about having, you know, not having diabetes. And that's, that's how it came out, you know, it was like in a fight, and, I mean, we knew. And so then it was the weird secret that she didn't know we knew.
Scott Benner 22:18
Wait, you're telling me that while your sister was in high school, how old were you?
Laura 22:25
We were two years apart, so I think I was in high school as well.
Scott Benner 22:28
Okay, so you're a handful of years from your away from your mom passing away, and she believes that the diabetes she's had for some 25 years at that point you're unaware of she believes you don't know
Laura 22:43
that's insane. Yeah. Oh, you
Scott Benner 22:47
Catholics. I'm so sorry for you. Oh, my God, what you must be going through. I'm not even kidding. Hey, listen, let me just say a couple things to you Catholics, right now, your vagina and your penis are fine. Don't, don't be embarrassed about them at all. Okay, that's the first thing, and then secondly, it's okay to, like, have a feeling, what do you count? Are you wait? Are you Irish? On top of all this? I am.
Laura 23:12
I mean, she did go through some hard times, so when she had a boyfriend, when she was diagnosed, and he ended up breaking up with her because of her diabetes. When she was married, when she married my dad, they moved to New York City, and I think she actually, I think she might have been like a social work, like some sociology or something like that. She had her first job lined up. They moved to New York City, and then she was just filling out the paperwork and check the box that she had diabetes or whatever, and they said they didn't realize she had that. And they, you know, different times they did, your dad, know when my dad, my dad, no, okay, but, uh, she, she lost her first job because of diabetes. Oh, so
Scott Benner 23:57
she lost a boyfriend, then a job, and then she's probably like, I'm not telling people about this anymore, but was the unconsidered circumstance of that, that by lying about it and hiding it so much, she wasn't taking care of it,
Laura 24:08
I think she believed she was in very good control, you know, even as she described it, you know, she was at the high side of normal. So I asked my dad relatively recently, you know, when she was happy with a a 1c, of eight. So she definitely kept it higher. Yeah,
Scott Benner 24:29
she thought she was doing well and but she passes at 49 of what, what was, what, what took her
Laura 24:35
pretty much every side effect you could have she did, yeah, but at day's end, she had a she had a wound on her foot that didn't heal, and then she actually had her leg amputated, but then she had her official cause of death was, I mean, she had sepsis, like had cellulitis. So, yeah,
Scott Benner 24:55
everything got her at once. It did. Yeah, I know what. Calling our episode, but I won't tell you till the end.
Laura 25:03
Okay, okay, I don't know. You might still change it. No, I got it.
Scott Benner 25:06
I know what I'm calling it. Don't you worry. All right, tell me a little bit about your child's diagnosis. So
Laura 25:11
with him, I did catch it early. I again, the Catholic, Irish Catholic. I didn't tell anyone. I suspected it, but I was just noticing he'd come home from school and we he never drank soda. But it was around Easter time, so we had, he would just go out and, like, down, like, a can of soda. And then I was just noticed that, you know, we were playing cards, and he got up, like, multiple times to go to the bathroom. It just well, within, like, a very short time period. So, and then, you know, I could hear him going to the bathroom in the night. He lost weight, but he also had a huge growth spurt. So he wasn't like, skin and bones. And my mom, I had no idea that it was there was a genetic component, okay, quite honestly. So, you know, it's like the odds, I'm kind of being ridiculous, like, there's no way he has diabetes.
Scott Benner 26:06
Oh, you thought somebody in my life's already had this. There's no way it's going to happen again. What are the odds? Yeah, they are. What are the odds it's already happened to one person and my mom, yeah?
Laura 26:16
And where I didn't think it was genetic,
Scott Benner 26:19
right? Yeah. Or just familial. I don't know how to talk about it, to be perfectly honest. Like, is it genetic? Is it familial? Is it like, do you know, autoimmune issues just kind of run in clusters? Like, your dad probably has lot of your mom had type one. Your husband's got stuff on his side of the family. You guys get together, or it's gonna happen. Like, is that? It's not great, exactly. Yeah.
Laura 26:41
So, um, you know, I went to the drug we still had the high, high deductible plan, and I'm like, I'm not going to take them just to get a test. Like, this is silly. And he had a, he did have a physical coming up. So then I went to CVS, and I was going to buy a test kit. And quite honestly, even with two parents with diabetes, it was like, I don't even know what I'm supposed to get. So that was a fail. And then, in the midst of all this, we were having our kitchen remodeled so we're I spent the night at my mother in laws while they while they did the floors, and I forgot she actually is type two, sort of, okay. I went to the bathroom and she had, like, you know, the test strips on the counter. And I was like, I can't deal with it. Like, if he does have diabetes, I can't deal with it right now.
Scott Benner 27:35
I love that you're getting your kitchen redone. That's the most Catholic thing you've said so far. Like, your husband's like, in a fetal position. You're hiding everything. Your mom didn't tell anybody about her diabetes, your bike, but look how nice the kitchen looks. Am I right? Yeah, that's the most Catholic thing you've said so far. Can I real quickly, I dated a girl when I was young who is very Catholic, and I certainly won't give out any of her details, because I'm sure she wouldn't want them out. But her family was a disaster. But the front of their house always looked awesome. They made very carefully sure that the front of the house and the lawn and how the cars were and everything that you could see from the street was great. And as you went into the house, there was yelling and turmoil. And then you got to the backyard, it looked like a junkyard. But as long as the people from the street thought it looked good, they were happy. It's really
Laura 28:29
interesting. Well, as a sidebar, I think one of this did not like trigger me, thinking diabetes, but as far as like cleanliness goes, I was noticing, like, in the bathroom, the toilet kept having like black in it. I was like, Jesus, I'm doing a terrible job cleaning the house. And I have heard after the fact that, like with the high blood sugar, yeah, you can get like, mold in your toilet. Like, it's actually somewhat not common, but not uncommon. No
Scott Benner 29:01
kidding. A week ago I had a young guy on from Australia, and now I said Australia twice today, and he talked about that about like, he's like, my my toilet was like a petri dish, and I couldn't figure out why. Yeah,
Laura 29:12
it was kind of disgusting. Yeah, oh, my God, I'm terrible. But anyway, so then my son did have a he had his physical and they're like, Oh, do you have any concerns? And I said, No, but I did, and then
Scott Benner 29:26
you went to a doctor's appointment thinking your kid had diabetes. He said, Is there any concerns? You're like, nothing that God can't take care of if we just ignore it enough.
Laura 29:34
Again, I didn't know how to bring it up. So then, like, as the physical was completely wrapped up. I was like, by the way, can you test his blood
Scott Benner 29:43
sugar? Were they like, Hey, what the hell I think so,
Laura 29:47
because I actually got charged for two doctor's appointments.
Scott Benner 29:51
They were like, you can, but you're paying twice, honey. They did. I was so mad.
Laura 29:57
So then the nurse came in. She tested his sugar. Her and, like, looked down and walked out, and I was like, so then the doctor came back and shipped us right to children's, yeah,
Scott Benner 30:11
the Boston thing just makes this story better. I just want you
Laura 30:15
to know, okay, Irish,
Scott Benner 30:16
Catholic Boston, yeah? Like, yeah. Just, I love that, that it's, by the way, you're gonna have one of those episodes where, like, the crazy things you say are gonna keep happening, but like that you didn't mention it at the top of the doctor's visit. Is really interesting. Yeah,
Laura 30:31
I don't, I didn't know how to, I mean, and my son, so again, if we're hiding things, I didn't tell anyone. I was concerned. So then I had to call my husband and be like, oh, yeah, we're going to children's right now. And I mean, my son was 14. I think he didn't know I was concerned. It was like, the most awkward drive
Scott Benner 30:55
down. Did the kid how old at that point was he? Think he was 14? Did he look at you afterwards and go, Hey, how come you didn't mention this? No, no, you taught him to shut up and keep his thoughts inside too. It
Laura 31:07
was a quiet down. He's high functioning autistic, so back in the day when there was Asperger's, that's what you would classify him with. Okay, so it was really hard, like I didn't know what he was feeling. You know, I give him, like, knowing diabetes, it's a life changing diagnosis. Yeah, can I
Scott Benner 31:31
ask a couple of weird questions? Sure, are you very thin, like, your body, stature? No, you're not,
Laura 31:37
like, I'm not fat, but I used to be thinner. Are
Scott Benner 31:40
you like nervous thin is what I'm asking. You know what I mean when I say nervous thin? No, but I wish I was Do you know you don't? You know
Laura 31:49
I did lose 20 pounds with his diagnosis, though? Well, I'm just
Scott Benner 31:53
gonna generalize here. People can just be mad later. I think we all know a lady who seems high strung and is very thin. No, do we all know
Laura 32:01
a person like that? Yeah, I wouldn't say that's me.
Scott Benner 32:05
That's not you, okay?
Laura 32:06
But I might be, I mean, it might be me, and I just don't see myself that way. It's possible.
Scott Benner 32:10
Okay? So, like, I'm gonna tell you, I didn't want to say it till later because I didn't want to impede you. But like, I'm going to tell you what I'm calling the episode. What do you think I'm going to call it? I don't know. I think I'm gonna call it scribbling, okay, because, because you can hear me, because I called you out on it, like, for noise reasons, you're not stopping, and I'm so I assumed that you didn't stop because this is your coping mechanism. It probably is, and I didn't want you to stop if that, if it was helping you. And at the same time, I gotta wonder what's happening inside of you that, like, being honest, like this is literally causing your hand to move like that. Like, do you know what I mean? Like, do you wonder about that? Or No,
Laura 32:56
no, that's just who I am. Are you
Scott Benner 32:59
nervous right now? Are you upset? Are you uncomfortable? Like, what's happening?
Laura 33:05
I'd say whenever I'm on the phone, I need to either be state, walking or scribbling, because it helps me process. Is
Scott Benner 33:15
it like? Is it a like? Is it like, a spectrum thing, or is it like, I don't know, like, I'm trying to figure out if it's you have so much pent up energy that it that you're vibrating inside. Maybe do people are people comfortable around you? I think so. Yeah, I hope so. I hope. No. I mean, like, do you make other people vibrate? No, no, okay. Do you notice when other people are like that? When they're like, I'm using the words high strung because I'm old. I don't really know what I mean, but, like, we all know what I mean, right? Like, somebody who's just like, never stops, never sits still is always busy working, like, bouncing off of walls for no real reason, like when you stand next to them, they make you feel nervous? Do you know a person like that?
Laura 34:02
I do. Okay, I wouldn't say that's who I am. I think just when I'm on the phone, for whatever reason, it's literally just a move, it is. Oh No,
Scott Benner 34:11
kidding. So you think of yourself as pretty chill. Otherwise, yeah, interesting. Would other people describe you that way?
Laura 34:19
I think so, yeah, but then my sister in law does think on the topic, needs to be in con and for certain things, I need to be in control.
Scott Benner 34:27
You need that like that, that illusion that you're running things, I
Laura 34:31
wouldn't say, running things I've described myself as. I need to have a plan. I don't need to be the one that makes the plan, but I need to know what's just like a plan is, is
Scott Benner 34:40
the vibrating person in your life, your husband, maybe,
Laura 34:44
maybe, probably, probably, gotcha. This
Scott Benner 34:47
is so much fun. I'm so glad I started a podcast. But can you imagine me right now in a sheet metal shop with all these thoughts in my head, like, how, like, crazed I must have been when I was doing this. I was like, talking to people, and they were probably like, why? Is he asking me these stupid questions that, like, I so interested in
Laura 35:03
people? No, no. People are reaching out to you, being like, I want to talk to you.
Scott Benner 35:08
Like, and at the end, some of them are like, Can I send you my co pay? And I'm like, Sure, I'll take it, but nobody ever sends it. I just want to point that out, because there's so much you can learn about somebody by just stopping and talking to them. You know, just really interesting, like, but, but again, like, I feel like you've now told five little stories whose moral is all you should tell people how you feel and what you're thinking, you know, I mean, like you took your your son is at that appointment you never mentioned to him, like, we want to check on a thing. Like your husband somehow was where he was, but five seconds before that, you had no idea. Like, does it make you wonder what you don't know about him right now?
Laura 35:48
Probably, yeah, but for the most part, he's, he's very like he's, he's very stable, and very much he works in operations. We decided, after my son was diagnosed, that he probably has Asperger's himself. Your husband most likely, okay,
Scott Benner 36:07
is that a thing you noticed about him when you were dating? No, because
Laura 36:11
my sister and I also think my dad, you know, once Asperger's didn't exist. You know, 50 years ago, my dad probably, you know, he wasn't the most emotional guy right growing up. So then I think my husband just seemed normal to me. Gotcha. Wow.
Scott Benner 36:30
Do you have any like Do you have any thoughts about you, what you want to talk about? Or do you want me to keep asking
Laura 36:37
questions? You can keep asking one at least somewhat funny thing to, you know, after so my son only spent one night in the hospital, which is terrifying, you know, yeah, yeah, you learn everything. And then they're like, Okay, you can go home now and then, maybe not yet. And then we're out, you know, our kitchen, it was a complete gut remodel. And then I'd say, we're like, I don't know, three weeks in, and then, you know, you've got your contractor guy that's there every morning, so he was the very first person I saw after diagnosis. Oh, so, you know, and it's just weird, because I was here every morning, and then I'm just not here. So he just, like, looked at me, and then I just started crying. Started crying. So
Scott Benner 37:26
like, Jesus, I just want to get paid. These people can't fall apart right now. I got a lot of money into this place.
Laura 37:34
It was just like, so weird though, because, I mean, it's like invasive, having someone in your house while you're going through, like, trauma, yeah,
Scott Benner 37:40
did you end up sharing a lot of it with the contractor because of that?
Laura 37:45
Yeah. I mean, I, I, I tried really hard to not be my mom. So, like, I'm like, um, this can't be a secret. This can't be something that is hidden. This is just how life is going to be. You know, this is your life.
Scott Benner 38:00
How successful were you in being more open?
Laura 38:05
I would say I was open, but then my son doesn't, he doesn't hide it. But I also felt it was his story to tell. Okay, so I, you know, in different situations. I'm not gonna, like, shout it out if that's not something he wants to discuss.
Scott Benner 38:26
Yeah, I could do an entire, like, series of ardent stories, of things my wife has said to other people that aren't it's like, why are we telling people that?
Laura 38:36
And it's, it's hard to be respect. You know? It's, yeah, need to be respectful. But then there's also a safety component,
Scott Benner 38:44
yeah, I figure that, I think everybody goes to that, right? Like, as the parent you're, you're like, Well, this is kind of my story. Like, you know what I mean? Like, my kid is having this experience. Like, I'd like to talk to somebody about this experience that I'm, I'm having through, you know, parenting my child with it, except the pre once the kid gets to a certain age, you're like, that's not your story. It's my story. And it's interesting, though, because both are true. And so what do you do? So as the parent, you're supposed to, like, dummy up and not say anything, right? Or get a friend that won't let anybody know that you've shared that thing with them,
Laura 39:19
exactly. And I think that's, you know, you're, I'd say, you know, Arden's a couple years older, which, following the podcast was kind of nice, because, other than the period, I kind of know what was coming in the next couple of years, you know. So, you know, college was a change, and a stay at home mom for the most part, and then diabetes really does become your life, and then all of a sudden, it's not
Scott Benner 39:49
Yeah, so he went away. How long ago?
Laura 39:53
He's a sophomore right now? Or no, okay?
Scott Benner 39:54
And is he managing to your expectation, like in a way that makes you. Comfortable, or do you feel on edge the whole time that he's away? A
Laura 40:03
little bit of both? He's not in as well of control as he would be if I was managing it. But I also know he I'm giving him grace, and it's something he has to live with and figure out. So he definitely runs higher than I'd like him to but as long as he doesn't, you know, die, I'm letting him go with you know, he always doses, he always corrects. It's just he does get high blood sugars that stay high longer than I'd like, yeah,
Scott Benner 40:36
how aware of your mom's situation is he probably not at all. You don't think he knows his grandmother had type one. I
Laura 40:47
think he knew that, but never gotten into
Scott Benner 40:50
that she passed from it, right? Really, any details? Do you think you'll ever tell him that I'm not hiding? I feel like I know it's like, I feel like I know the answer, but I'm just,
Laura 41:05
yeah, I thought, I mean, if you were to ask questions, I definitely would, but I don't think I'd. I mean, at this point, I think it would be kind of terrifying. I mean, she legitimately, she had Corrective Eye Surgery, but, like, had the broken blood vessels in her eyes. So went through periods she couldn't see her fingers actually, like started losing circulation and literally started falling off. At what age? Well, she died at 49 and I'd say the last couple years. And
Scott Benner 41:35
did she still think she was doing well while her fingers were tumbling off?
Laura 41:39
Or does she know at that point she wasn't the damage is done, you know?
Scott Benner 41:43
Yeah, but I'm saying, like, is this like, a five seconds before that happens? Thing was she would she have said, I'm doing great. Probably, yeah. Then I think the question has to be, and I feel weird because you and I are the same age, and I feel like I'm talking to you, like, Hey, let me explain something to you, which makes me feel weird, but you know, it's okay. Yes, it's my job, so I'm just gonna keep doing it. It's your podcast. Well, yeah, exactly so. And you're here willfully. Nobody made you. Nobody made you. Yeah, you look, yeah, that's, by the way, when some people are like, couldn't you tell they were uncomfortable? I'm like, they could have stopped at any point. Like, I didn't, like, I'm not holding any anywhere, not the point. I hope you see that what you said is correct. I think that if you just pulled him aside right now and you're like, hey, here's a story about grandma, and then you told him all that, it would be a lot, and probably too much for him. But I also think that if you don't tell him anything, and don't slowly open him up to that story, that one day when he finds out, and he will find out one day, he's gonna be pissed at you for not telling him. There's a balance you have to keep in there. You have to give it, you have to tell the story slowly over years. That makes sense.
Laura 42:54
Yeah? I mean, he knows he died of diabetes and complications, yeah. But
Scott Benner 42:59
you know what I mean? Like, the bigger picture, like, what I'm saying is, I don't think you want to be 70, when he's 40, and have him come to you and say, Hey, I really want to know about all this. And then when you tell him, he goes, Oh, I wish I would have known this sooner. You can't control which way it goes. No matter what you get. You want the opposite. That's about as human of a thing as I've ever seen in my life. So if you gave him all the information, he would say later, I wish she wouldn't have told me all that. It was overwhelming. And if you keep it all from him, he's going to say, I wish somebody would have told me that I could have used that information. So I think it's a game of like, disseminating it as appropriate over time, with the idea of getting it all out at a time where he's capable of handling it, which, in my mind, would be after he's 25 like, that's my thought. But also, you know him better than I do, but I feel like I'm saying this because you seem like you come from a family of people who don't share anything with each other.
Laura 44:03
That's fair. Well, he's coming home today for cop for Easter. I'll let him know. Hey, how about that bunny?
Scott Benner 44:12
Are you still Catholic, or are you recovering, as they say, a recovering Catholic,
Laura 44:16
non practicing Catholic.
Scott Benner 44:18
I say still a believer, but
Laura 44:22
not going to church. Was
Scott Benner 44:23
it the church part that got you, or was it the the parenting style that
Laura 44:28
got you? I would say laziness.
Scott Benner 44:33
Wait, wait, explain that, when
Laura 44:35
the kids were little, you know, and then they're crying going to church, you know. Okay, babies cry. It got too I mean, it's terrible to say, it was too hard, but
Scott Benner 44:45
it felt like a job, not a calling. Is that fair, right? Okay, how would you describe your dad's parenting after your mom passed, we were probably
Laura 44:53
dysfunctional for a while, so he got remarried very shortly after, shortly after, yeah. Was the
Scott Benner 45:02
handsome man. I like that. You're laughing, but you're about to say something horrible, and you're like, Oh, here's a good one. He
Laura 45:10
didn't tell us. He didn't
Scott Benner 45:13
tell you. They got married.
Laura 45:16
No, get the out of here. Now you might change the name. I have
Scott Benner 45:24
to tell you, I think I'm not recording enough. Recording once a day. I feel like I'm leaving a lot on the table. Wait a minute. Jesus Christ. Yeah, that was weird. How long had your mom been gone? I think
Laura 45:37
he got married within a year.
Scott Benner 45:39
Within a year, were they happy? Yes
Laura 45:43
and no. It got dysfunctional at the end. So my dad got diagnosed with diabetes, pretty close to where my mom started failing. And then I think there's part of him that blame. Blamed her for her. Oh, like she didn't do it. Yeah, okay. So then he got a type A trying to, like, control, like, control her and make her treat it different daily. It almost became a competition. Oh,
Scott Benner 46:16
awesome. So was he, gosh, you know, sometimes I don't know. Sometimes things pop in my head and I think don't say that. Well, you say that now, but was he just looking for someone to hold his penis, or was he like, ex like, is he lonely? Or was he like, Why do you think he got married, remarried so quickly? Sorry to say penis. Talking about your dad.
Laura 46:41
I apologize. You can say penis. So that was actually how he got diagnosed. To change the subject was he was driving, my mom and dad were maybe driving, like, on an hour trip, and he had to pee so bad that he actually made her hold his penis and while he peed in a cup, and then she's like, this is not normal. I
Scott Benner 47:05
am the best interviewer in the world. Seriously, you know those guys that people would, they say, like, Dan Rather, and all that bullshit.
Laura 47:12
Like, right? You say penis, like, a story. I got that story
Scott Benner 47:17
from you. Yeah, wow. So your mom and dad are driving down the road. He's got undiagnosed diabetes, probably lot of and he's peeing so much that your mom handles the thing, the thing handle, I don't know where to go. She handles everything while he's driving, so that they stop, so that, you know, it's nice. You call your dad's penis a unit. I think he'd like that and and so she because instead of pulling over constantly,
Laura 47:47
he they were on the like the highway, and he had to go so bad, I
Scott Benner 47:53
gotta say, I'm assuming the romance was gone by then. I
Laura 47:57
don't know she was holding it,
Scott Benner 48:00
Laura, that's your description of sex, not mine. Fair, wow, how about that? Well, that's the best story anyone's ever gonna tell. We can just close the podcast down now. It's over awesome, but no back to him, but back to him. Sneaky. Getting married. Like, how long was your dad married before you knew it? Remarried?
Laura 48:20
Like six months,
Scott Benner 48:23
so you would score your college. So I
Laura 48:25
was out of college at this point, living in Connecticut, and then my sister still lived, like in the hometown, but not your
Scott Benner 48:33
sister lived in a home in the town your dad lived in, but like going to school, but pretty locally, but not in the house. He was married for six months, and nobody knew it. And go ahead, whatever you're going to say I want to hear.
Laura 48:46
I think he was ashamed. And then I think he got bullied a little bit into getting married sooner than he wanted to. Okay.
Scott Benner 48:54
So he was ashamed, ultimatums, okay. He was ashamed to be in a relationship, and then a bossy Lady made him marry her. Kind of are they still married? They are? Is she still bossy? You don't like her at all. Do you?
Laura 49:13
You don't have to say,
Scott Benner 49:14
okay, all right, sorry. Sometimes I forget. Other people are going to hear
Laura 49:20
this. It's well, it's one of those, do you share that you did a podcast or just be like generic Laura, which probably after I said my mom was holding my dad's penis, I'll just,
Scott Benner 49:29
I want to be completely clear. You shouldn't tell anybody about this. No, I wouldn't tell your husband. I wouldn't. I literally not. This is the one time I'm going to tell you, I'd keep this to myself.
Laura 49:43
Shouldn't I tell my son? Thought that was your advice. You should start
Scott Benner 49:46
being honest tomorrow. Okay, not today. Yeah, you've been too you've been too honest. If you No, there's no way you should tell anybody about this. No, I'm thinking, I won't. You said your husband cry. Act like was 10 minutes into this. Okay, so I just need to know, where do you meet? Is it like a lady up the street who was like, Oh, look, who's free? Was it one of those things?
Laura 50:10
She is Korean and had like, a store, like a convenience store, okay, I don't know. I don't know what
Scott Benner 50:18
her being Korean has to do with this, but that's awesome. I really appreciate that you said that for some reason. Well, she wasn't Catholic. She, oh, you're just letting me know she wasn't Catholic. I see, I think Koreans can be Catholic. That's fair. Yeah, I think there's a whole episode of The West Wing about that, is there not? I don't know. I spent this a long time ago. Sorry. Okay. Wow, holy, not usually this tired before an hour,
Laura 50:49
I kept a lot in, man,
Scott Benner 50:50
wow, you let a lot out, too. You've been listening to the podcast for six years. Do you think I'm looking at your notes?
Laura 50:57
Yeah, so it's funny. I was going back so I don't listen to it as much as I used to. Oh, I'm
Scott Benner 51:04
sorry. Goodbye. No wait, what?
Laura 51:07
So basically, I would say listen to it up until my son went to college, because there's nothing I can really do to change him now, like he doesn't want my advice. Oh, I just feel like, if I listen and then get press, you know, want to tell him something, and he's just like, whatever, mom, yeah, almost like, would make me more frustrated. So I still listen periodically. Say, enjoy listening to but I would say at the beginning I started very close to when you were doing the series with Jenny. So it was just very informative in a very easy to digest way. And you didn't do as as many podcasts back then. So what I would do, I would have, I went a year back, so I would listen to all of your current ones, and then have like another, like, starting from a year until I caught up. Oh,
Scott Benner 52:04
I see. Okay. Am I making too much? Should I stop? No, okay, I can't stop. Now, by the way, this thing's a runaway train. I'm not in charge of that anymore. By the way it gets made, the way it gets made. Now, honestly, where the excitement comes from for me, like, literally, is, after talking to you today, I just want to go talk to somebody else. Like, I'd like to hang up, have a sandwich, come back and talk to somebody else like, I love, I genuinely love doing this. I'm starting to think about making other podcasts that I don't even think people are ever going to hear, like, I'll tell you a secret. I've already set one up. I found this person who's just really expert at a thing. And I told him, I'm like, I would like to sit and talk to you for hours, like, just hours and hours, and it's got nothing to do with diabetes, and I'll just put it out in a different podcast. I don't even care if anybody listens to it or not, like I just think it's interesting to find a person who's so expert at something. I don't want a bullet pointed like, the slide show about, like, here's the things I do. And like, I don't give a about any of that. Like, I want to know about how a person who's that good at something and that dedicated to it, how they think, like, about other things. Like, I think there's something to be learned in there. And I'm going to do the interview how for as many hours as it takes, and then I'm gonna put it together, and then I'm gonna go look for somebody else who's like, interesting like that, and have a conversation with them. I don't even care if anybody ever hears it like I think it'd just be great to do so the truth is, is that I could put out an episode every 12 hours, I think, if I really followed my heart on it, but I'm slowing myself down because I'm now putting episodes out like every day, like every and people are consuming them. So, you know, I don't know like, I just, I love talking to people like you were so interesting. Oh, thank
Laura 53:55
you. I think you have a good podcast voice. So if you do another one, I'll listen to you. It'll work
Scott Benner 54:00
out. Okay, it'll work out. You'll at least have one follower a topic. You don't give it, you don't care anything about just talking to the person. Maybe
Laura 54:07
you should just go on the streets and find someone and be like, Hey, want to talk. I
Scott Benner 54:12
think I could, by the way, like I, there's part of me that thinks I could show up at a diner and just like, keep putting people in a booth and talking to them. I think there's something really interesting about a lot of people, plus, look at all the stuff they hold inside.
Laura 54:27
Exactly No. I think everyone has a story. Yeah, tell
Scott Benner 54:31
me something crazy that you haven't told me yet. Like, think crazier is there a story? Does something pop into your head, even if you don't want to tell it to tell it to me, you don't have to tell it to me. But does it like, does something like, If I said, tell me something about yourself, you don't tell other people that, I would go, Oh, my god, is that true? Like, does something come into your head?
Laura 54:53
I can't think of anything interesting.
Scott Benner 54:54
You need the conversation to find it. Yeah, I do. Yeah. No, not just you. So I was kind of making a point, sorry.
Laura 55:01
Like, now think about it all day. People don't
Scott Benner 55:06
know what's interesting about them. I think that's it ends up being true over and over again. Like, I if you asked me about me, I don't know how to talk about me, which people are probably like, that's a lie. But like, if you got me away from this microphone and said, like, I think I did an interview the other day with a guy named Nick, and he's like, What do you do for fun? And I was like, I don't know. Man, I just make this podcast, like, this is fun. So when the tables were turned on me, and he just asked me, I didn't have an immediate answer. Now, he wasn't, you know, he wasn't trying or skilled at, like, getting it out of me. Like, so I'm sure somebody could get it out of me, but at the same time, I don't know if I could stop long. Stop long enough to answer their questions, but that's
Laura 55:44
what I think is interesting for you to do this podcast and another, you know, you've diabetes has been your life since Arden was two or four, and now she's in college. She's an adult, and she doesn't need you quite as much. And you know you're still giving so much to the community, but it almost is like you can take a step back. I think
Scott Benner 56:07
that I've taken my ability, or my skill, or whatever the hell this is, right, whatever, however, we got to all the things about your life. We got to in 58 minutes. And I will submit that we got to a lot, okay, like, so whatever. And part of that is because you trust me and because you've been listening for a long time. Like, and I and you feel you I'm putting words in your mouth, but you probably feel grateful to me in some way, right? I do. Yeah, right. So, like, so, you're open to me already. Like, so, but like, I'm almost interested, like, these skills that I've developed to have conversations for people with diabetes, like, would it transfer over to something like, when I can't ask about like, Hey, tell me about your diagnosis. I know this is going to sound crazy to people, maybe, but like, when I ask about your diagnosis, like, that's me being lazy and me realizing that you want to hear about people's diabetes. That's why you're here. But my inclination is not to talk about the diabetes as much like I think that part just comes out in a conversation. But I don't know if I'm I might be wrong. So I
Laura 57:09
agree to a point. I think everyone's story you know, whether you know it's your whoever, whoever is important to you that's diagnosed, whether it happened a week ago or it happened 30 years ago. It's, it was, it's such a traumatic part of life, of your life, and you can remember every single detail, like I remember, like watching, I mean, I can still go back to the hospital and remember that uncomfortable chair I slept in. I remember the person in the room we were sharing the room with. I remember, like, what was on the TV. So I think when doing a podcast, the details of the diagnosis are so bright and brilliant that you just remember them. And it's easy to talk about
Scott Benner 57:59
no and I, and don't get me wrong, like, I I want people to talk about that stuff. I kind of meant from like, a interviewing perspective, like, those are the ones I just ask, like, because I know people want the answers, but like, well, you
Laura 58:11
can't really ask, did your mom ever hold your dad's penis? Well, yeah, although that's gonna
Scott Benner 58:15
be the opening question. Now I'm gonna be like, instead of asking people there's other autoimmune in their family, I'd be like, have your parents ever driven and peed at the same time? That's my question. So the way I think of this is the conversation that you and I had today is about being a person, and yes, you're the mother of a child with type one, and you're the mother of a child who's, you know, on the spectrum. You're the daughter of a woman who hid her, her her diabetes. You're the daughter of a woman who died early because of it, of a of a father who probably has Lada. You know, you're a child of, you know, an upbringing that taught you to keep things private. And I think that if you're listening to this like you can't tell right now, but another person listening to this, like all those things go together, and then hopefully they see those things in their own life, and they think, oh, I should probably be more open about this, because it'll very likely lead to a healthier outcome for me or my kid like that. To me, is what we talked about today, but you have to be honest and open for it to come out. Because I could just say it. I could drag Erica on here every day, and I could say, hey, Erica, hey, we're going to tell people about how they need to be open so they'll be healthy at the end. And you know what everybody will do? They'll go like, this one, shut this. Like nobody wants to hear that. Like it might be true and it might be valuable, but nobody's going to sit for that. I was listening to my own podcast this morning because somebody told me to listen to one of them. They're like, You have to really listen back to this one. So I'm listening to it, and I jump in the shower and it ends, and another podcast comes on, not mine, somebody else's. And as they're like, talking it up, all I could think was, Oh, I gotta shut this off. I like. Oh, this is, this is painful, like the way and but they were setting up like, what I think would have been a really important conversation. I just didn't like the way they were doing it. And it wasn't holding my
Laura 1:00:10
attention. Is it their voice or their questions? A
Scott Benner 1:00:13
little bit of everything, their voice was a little not great the like, the boringness of the setup. I recognized the importance of what they were talking about, the way they were saying. I was like, Oh, do I really want to live through that conversation? Like, ew. And I even thought, like, I could use this information, but they're not going to present it in a way that's going to capture my attention. You got on this podcast and spoke honestly about about 50 things. That's why somebody's listening, and hopefully now, at the end, when they're getting ready to shut it off, they say to themselves, I should probably be more open and honest. I think it would be healthier, like, that's all I'm trying to do. But I don't know that I'm trying to do that when you jump on, because I don't know who you are, until we start talking.
Laura 1:00:55
Sure, yeah, listening to podcasts. If someone's not honest, their podcast is boring. I think everyone has, I don't wanna say secrets, but things that you know. The more you're open, the more of the flow of a conversation, and hopefully the more interesting podcast.
Scott Benner 1:01:12
I'm hoping to do that tomorrow, like I'm getting to interview a professional football player tomorrow that has type one, and I'm super excited about it, and I have a whole pathway that I think the conversation should go. But they also were like, you know, can you send him some of the questions ahead of time? Like, so he's like, ready? And I'm like, can we not? Like, I was like, can't, can I just talk to him the way I talked to Laura? Like, wouldn't it be great to find out if his mom was holding, like, his, you know, whatever, and he's not gonna let that out anyway. So, like, I want to be like, let me just pick at this and but so instead of just sending a bunch of benign, like questions to them, I said, this is how I just ended up sitting down and having the conversation in my head without him. And I said, this is how I hope for it to go, because I still think there's some I think there's something really important to learn from this person, and I think this is what it is. But you know what's gonna happen if I start digging in and that's not the truth, then it's gonna, it's gonna die right there, and then I'll have to, you'll know later, like, He'll either, like, be chill and go with it, or you'll hear me ask a bunch of the canned questions that I have, like, aside for him. Like, that's how you'll figure out how it went and, you know, but I'm really hopeful, because they say he's really great guy, and he's super open and everything. So I'm excited. Well, good, yeah. Anyway, all right, what have we not talked about that we should have?
Laura 1:02:32
Think that's probably it. Otherwise, we'd have to do
Scott Benner 1:02:36
a whole nother podcast. Are you in any way, shape or form, thinking of going to talk therapy. Now,
Laura 1:02:42
I think I just had my talk therapy. I think this will do it. I'm good. I
Scott Benner 1:02:46
don't think I'm a professional. If you feel better after this, but not good. Do you think you'd say to yourself, maybe I should find a therapist to talk to or do? Is that not a thing you would
Laura 1:02:56
do? I did it. I did go to one once, just one time. It's just not really I'm not against it. I feel day to day, good enough. Awesome.
Scott Benner 1:03:08
Wait, that's a great way to describe your life. Day to day. I feel good enough. Good enough. If you heard your All right, ready? If you heard your kid describe their life like that, what would your next thought be,
Laura 1:03:21
how can we make it better? Yeah, so, how can you make it
Scott Benner 1:03:26
better? We've said it 50 times, Laura, I need you to say it. I
Laura 1:03:30
need to talk more. Right, right? There you go. That's all. Just let it
Scott Benner 1:03:33
out more. Find somebody and if the people around you aren't the right people, then find somebody else you can you'll be happy you did it. Are you happy that you had this conversation? I am.
Laura 1:03:43
I think it's funny. After talking to you for or listening to you for so many years, it's just, you know, I know so much about you, obviously, well now you know more about me, but it's it's interesting. Why
Scott Benner 1:03:56
actually be on a podcast? Why is it interesting? Tell me just
Laura 1:04:00
because, again, I know, I feel like I know so much about you, you know, and every you know, all you share so much and are so open. It's just kind of neat to actually be able to talk to you, to
Scott Benner 1:04:11
be able to talk to me. Okay, all right. Am I open? Does that? Is that how I strike you as being really open? I think you are very open. Yeah, I think I am. But there's so much more I would say that if I didn't think, you know, we didn't live through the whole last couple of years where everybody's so like hell bent on, you know, not each other for saying how they feel about things. But it's going, I don't know if you notice, it's your other podcast. It's going away, though. I don't know if you notice that the zeitgeist is getting we're drifting back to the 70s again. I can't wait. I want to, I want to be podcasting still when it's okay again to just say how you feel, although you said a lady was Korean today for no reason, so I guess we're getting just like there was no reason to say that at
Laura 1:04:51
all. I would say I said it culturally. So she's, she's from Korea, so I. I mean, she speaks English, but
Scott Benner 1:05:03
Laura, stop, stop. I know you don't mean anything by it. Like, that's my point. I don't mean anything about it. I think it was just, I don't know I'm saying. I'm excited to get back to the point where somebody can just say something like that and it just, and people don't want to be offended by it. Do you see what I'm saying? Like, there are plenty of people who would make a comment about somebody's background and mean something by it. You clearly don't mean anything poor about it at all. I'm excited for a time where people just hear that and keep rolling and don't hear it and go, Oh, you know, we got on our hands here. This lady's a racist. Like, No, she's not. Like, stop it. You know what I mean? Like, like, that kind of thing. Like, I'm excited for that part, like, where we can, like, I really feel like we're back there again, like it's happening. So I'm super excited, but it's one of the most ill intended consequences of one of the political things that's happened that I'd never expected. Like, I didn't expect to be happy at all for the next couple of years, but I was like, Oh, this one thing is actually like, pleasant, like, oh, okay, oh, I guess I'll take that, see,
Laura 1:06:03
and you, you have to be more careful on the podcast, I can offend people, but you can't. I'm
Scott Benner 1:06:08
also not looking I shouldn't, yeah, well, there's no listen. There's no good reason to like, I don't. I wouldn't understand if you had a grocery store and you, you felt very strongly politically, one way or the other, I would have no understanding of you making that public. Like, are you trying to sell groceries to everybody, not just the people who agree with your whims about you know, I don't understand that idea like you're selling groceries. Like, go sell groceries to people you we don't need to hear about your opinion. And I'm trying to help people with their diabetes, not just people with diabetes who lean one way or the other so, and the truth is is I don't feel strongly in any direction, like I find myself thinking mostly like I hear things and I go, that makes sense. That's a common sense thing. And so is that. And I think that somebody would take the first thought and attribute it way right, and the other thought and attribute it way left. And I listen to both of them, and I think those things make a lot of sense to me. So yeah,
Laura 1:07:04
back in the day, I was, well, I still think I'm independent, but I have opinions. I
Scott Benner 1:07:10
honestly, for the first time, said to somebody, I was like, should I spend five minutes changing my affiliation to independent? Like, would that be a better representation of me? And then I was like, does it even matter? Like, I don't know. You know, it matters or not. It doesn't really matter. Yeah. Also, I come from a time where being moderate was a good thing, and then they people spent years telling you that that meant you didn't have an opinion. And I'm like, that's not true. So I don't know it's very strange. But anyway, I like where we're headed right now, in that, in this, in this one vein, I like that everybody's not running around, judging everybody every five seconds, because that was really tiresome and boring, and I did not enjoy it at all. So okay, well, here we go, Laura, you're awesome. We're calling this episode scribbling. Seriously, it was awesome. Like I I could not have had a better time with you. I appreciate you jumping on on such short notice.
Laura 1:08:06
Oh, good. I'm glad you replied. I'm glad I got to talk to you. You were the
Scott Benner 1:08:10
first person that said they were available, by the way, you weren't the only person who said they were available tomorrow. You were the first person. And I said, first come, first serve. And then there you are. So I genuinely appreciate it. All right. Hold on one second for me. Give me one second.
Thanks for tuning in today, and thanks to Medtronic diabetes for sponsoring this episode. We've been talking about Medtronic mini med 780 G system today, an automated insulin delivery system that helps make diabetes management easier day and night, whether it's their meal detection technology for the Medtronic extended infusion set, it all comes together to simplify life with diabetes. Go find out more at my link, Medtronic diabetes.com/juicebox you 90s, I'd like to thank the blood glucose meter that my daughter carries, the contour next gen blood glucose meter. Learn more and get started today at contour, next.com/juicebox and don't forget, you may be paying more through your insurance right now for the meter you have, then you would pay for the contour next gen in cash. There are links in the show notes of the audio app you're listening in right now, and links at Juicebox podcast.com to contour and all of the sponsors. The episode you just enjoyed was sponsored by the twist a ID system powered by tide pool. If you want a commercially available insulin pump with twist loop that offers unmatched personalization and precision or peace of mind. You want twist, twist.com/juicebox
Hey, thanks for listening all the way to. End. I really appreciate your loyalty and listenership. Thank you so much for listening. I'll be back very soon with another episode of The Juicebox Podcast.
Check out my algorithm pumping series to help you make sense of automated insulin delivery systems like Omnipod five loop, Medtronic 780, G twist, tandem control, IQ and much more. Each episode will dive into the setup, features and real world usage tips that can transform your daily type one diabetes management. We cut through the jargon, share personal experiences and show you how these algorithms can simplify and streamline your care. If you're curious about automated insulin pumping, go find the algorithm pumping series in the Juicebox Podcast. Easiest way. Juicebox podcast.com, and go up into the menu, click on series, and it'll be right there. Hey, what's up, everybody? If you've noticed that the podcast sounds better, and you're thinking like, how does that happen, what you're hearing is Rob at wrong way recording, doing his magic to these files. So if you want him to do his magic to you, wrong wayrecording.com, you got a podcast. You want somebody to edit it. You want rob you.
Please support the sponsors
The Juicebox Podcast is a free show, but if you'd like to support the podcast directly, you can make a gift here. Recent donations were used to pay for podcast hosting fees. Thank you to all who have sent 5, 10 and 20 dollars!
