#1639 Heavy - Part 2

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B is  the mom of a T1D son who was diagnosed at 16 months. He is currently 2 and they are about 9 months into managing diabetes. Part 2 of 2.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends and welcome back to another episode of The Juicebox podcast.

This is part two of a two part episode. Go look at the title if you don't recognize it. You haven't heard part one yet. It's probably the episode right before this in your podcast player, I am here to tell you about juice cruise 2026 we will be departing from Miami on June 21 2026 for a seven night trip going to the Caribbean. That's right, we're going to leave Miami and then stop at Coco k in the Bahamas. After that, it's on to St Kitts, St Thomas and a beautiful cruise through the Virgin Islands. The first juice Cruise was awesome. The second one's going to be bigger, better and bolder. This is your opportunity to relax while making lifelong friends who have type one diabetes, expand your community and your knowledge on juice cruise 2026 learn more right now at Juicebox podcast.com/juice. Cruise. At that link, you'll also find photographs from the first cruise. Nothing you hear on the Juicebox podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your health care plan.

This episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by the Dexcom g7 the same CGM that my daughter wears. Check it out now at dexcom.com/juicebox this episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by Omnipod five. Omnipod five is a tube, free, automated insulin delivery system that's been shown to significantly improve a 1c and time and range for people with type one diabetes when they've switched from daily injections. Learn more and get started today at omnipod.com/juicebox of my link, you can get a free starter kit right now. Terms and Conditions apply. Eligibility may vary. Full terms and conditions can be found at omnipod.com/juicebox Yeah, all right, let's all jump out a window together. It'll be

B 2:17
nice. Well, not today, not

Scott Benner 2:19
today. We're gonna go one more day b i like it, one more day,

B 2:22
one more day, one day at a time. Yeah. So I the way, I guess I look at it is I know I'm gonna have to give him full control at some point. So I'm taking it on myself try to manage it as well as I can at this point. So when it's my when it's his turn, he's not starting from just over, you know, just over the hill of of a complication, like, no, no. Mom gave me a really, really good foundation. And so whatever happens here is, you know, up to me. I don't know if that's the way he's going to see it, but that's in my mind. What I'm trying to do is just trying to set him up for a firm foundation. So if he does want to f off a little bit because he doesn't care for a minute, it's not going to completely ruin him, because he had great a one season and great management while he was growing up and as a child, so he actually can do a little bit of whatever he wants to do until he gets old enough to realize I should probably care a little bit more about my health. That's in my perfect world, how I see it.

Scott Benner 3:32
You can't really bank health for later, but sure, I take your point. I've done the same thing. Martin's very adept at taking care of herself. You know, I would say that she's doing a terrific job of managing everything, like there's hiccups along the way and stuff like that. I think that an expectation has been set a long time ago, and she doesn't meet it the way I met it, but she's very close. I've never seen Arden ignore diabetes, ever and like that. In and of itself, I think is a major win. She's not going to ignore it. I don't think she always wants to be involved in it. I think there are times when it's like, oh my god, I can't believe I gotta change this device again, or that this isn't going well, or whatnot. Like, I'm not gonna say it's like, clear sailing the whole time, most of the times, awesome. And when push comes to shove, she won't ignore it. And I think even if it never gets any better than that, I think that's a really great job by us and by her, I'd look at that as a win. Yeah, yeah, for sure. The other stuff is just like, where it really is tough, and I don't know how to manage this at all. I'm not good at it in the moment, but you spend so much time being in a relationship where there's a thing that has to happen, you're the one facilitating it or saying it, they're the one capitulating and that that I don't think that's a great way to grow up, because around the diabetes, there's never really been an ability for. For everybody to just not pay attention to it for three weeks, you know? And so

B 5:04
it's less unless you want to end up in the ER, there's

Scott Benner 5:07
the possibility there of implications later. Because, I mean, it's almost like, you know, I I've said before, like every Catholic girl I knew grew or cut their hair when they graduated from high school, you know what I mean? When we were growing up, you knew if you wanted to fool around with girls and have a great time, you'd go to the Catholic girls because, because they were so busy being repressed by the people that that raised them, once they got free, yeah, once they got free, they were like, you know, they were a party. I wasn't

B 5:37
Catholic, but I I definitely grew up in a religious household. Not so much at this point anymore, but trust me, I know exactly what you

Scott Benner 5:46
mean, yeah, and so I think the same thing about the diabetes is, like, you're just going along as the parent doing a good job, and the kids cool with it, because kids don't really fight back in those situations. But at some point they're going to get to the part where they're like, I have to plant my flag in the ground and become a human being. Like, I have to be a real adult right here, so I need to go find something and rebel against it. And what is it? What happens when it's this? Pick something else? Like, that's my point. Like, you don't know if that's gonna happen or not, but if it does, trust me, you gotta know what to do. No book about that. I haven't made a podcast episode yet that's going to help you through that one. Okay, I don't know what the answer is. Do you think that

B 6:28
kids need to, especially if they grow up with diabetes so young that they need to be in some type of therapy about it, and even if it's with the parents, or maybe not without, without the parents, so they can just talk about how annoyed they are about these things. What do you what do you think about that?

Scott Benner 6:44
I mean, I don't know how valuable or not it would be. I think it's person to person, but if it would be valuable to you than it is, I think that it would be great. I would be open to doing that with Arden right now, because I imagine we have that relationship where it just feels like I've been telling her what to do her whole life. I didn't want that like I wish you could have gone and found me when I was 25 and said to me, Hey, you know, would you be super excited to learn a lot about type one diabetes and talk to a kid about it every day? And I wouldn't have been. I don't want that at all. I like that. The podcast helps people, but, but

B 7:18
you hate that your daughter had to get it so that could lead you down that road.

Scott Benner 7:21
Like, yeah, you know, I spent the last couple of weeks around a lot of people. I went to friends for life, and I did this cruise with a bunch of listeners. And both were really, like, fulfilling, like, and they were just, they were lovely experiences, both of them,

B 7:37
but you also, in the back of your mind, just wish that you didn't have to have that experience, because that therefore means that your child too, but you don't make me cry, but I don't. I This isn't who I want to be either. You know,

Scott Benner 7:52
like, this isn't what I want to do. I don't want to be the guy that does this. Yes, sucks. Yeah, you take the high side of it, it's helped so many people, and I've grown as a person. And Arden's, you know, has awesome health because of it. And, I mean, there's a lot of positive to it, but, you know, you go, let me take a magic wand and make my perfect life. I'm not a, not a fcking podcaster about my kids illness or anybody's illness. I don't want to be involved this every day, you know, but you don't that's not how life works. You don't get to pick what happens to you. You get to pick how you respond to it. And I think my response has been really positive, and it lifts me up, and I hope it lifts everyone else up. And I think one day, I do really believe that one day, I'll probably be long dead, and I think Arden will probably listen to every word of all this, and she'll probably recognize her life in it, and hopefully it'll serve as a an explanation to her for why these things happened. And you know that, you know I'm just the guy, like, I'm not really, not really someone's dad. You know what I mean? Like, I'm a guy. I met a girl. She was cute. I don't know what happened. Then there was a baby, you know what I mean, but this is what it is, and here we are. So I'm trying to make the best out of it, and I don't do I don't always do a great job of it, so and she doesn't either. By the way, she could be a lot easier than she is. Sometimes, if she didn't have diabetes, we'd just be having that conversation about something else that's the truth. Yeah, something else that, like didn't kill you though, something else that wouldn't impact your health. Hopefully. I mean, listen, knock on wood, like plenty of people listening right now, dealing with children who are, you know, shooting heroin every day and they knock you over in the mall to get diabetes instead of that. I don't know that. It's not that for everybody on some level. It's just, I think the levels are different and the outcomes are the possible outcomes are less severe for some things. But trust me, we are all having an interaction with our parents right now, or as. Parents that is following this exact same path. It's just the details are a little different. This is the crux of human parenting right here. That's why, eventually your mom says to you, I hope you have a kid one day and they're just like you.

B 10:15
I was a great kid, though, such a rule follower.

Scott Benner 10:19
I'm sure your mom don't think that about everything. By the way, it's not that your mom wishes that you have some difficult child, or that she even thinks you're difficult. She just wants you to know what she's been going through and it's hard and that she's trying. And when you tell that to your children, it's meaningless to them, because I've tried that. I've tried the path of like, Look, let me just talk to you like you're an adult and I'm an adult, and explain to you that I'm just a person doing the best I can here, and I don't get it right all the time, but I have really great intentions, and if you could just be a little more understanding, but I know why you're not, and all we got to do is live till you're 30 and you're gonna see but none of that helps in The moment. You know what I mean? Like, I do believe it's true. I do think we'll wake up one day and just like I went to my mom and said, I don't know why I made you cancel that party, and I have felt terrible about it my whole life, and I apologize, she still lived with it between the day I did it and the day I said it, and beyond. And I guess one day my son's gonna come to me and say, hey, you know some stuff I thought you were an asshole about, but I see it now, and I'm sorry, and Arden's gonna come to me and say, hey, you know that year that I argued with you about taking my thyroid meds. And like, you know that stuff? Like, I see how difficult that was, and I'm really sorry, and I know you were trying to help me, but I still feel terrible today, and I feel all the things that we're talking about here, knowing that she's a really great person, and this is all going to work out okay. Because I genuinely believe that everything's going to work out great. Doesn't make all this part like feel less, whatever this feels like exactly some days, and less heavy. Yeah, heavy is a good word.

B 12:01
I don't it wasn't what I envisioned it would be, but the conversation has been a little more heavy and reflective and like, I don't know what I would do in that situation. I hope this doesn't happen or, yeah, it's definitely been very reflective for me, and it does weigh a bit, yeah, for sure. So yeah, I like, I like to have

Scott Benner 12:23
it good. Well, B, I'll tell you what. Here's a secret about making a podcast is you get however I feel the day that we do it, like, that's the thing. It's all just following me, like, I'm pulling the conversation. If, if you and I jumped on two days from now, it would go a completely different way. Sometimes it's about people's voices, like sometimes people's voices impact me differently. There's an episode up today. I don't know what it's called. There's a woman on it who's who sounds like a person I know, and she has the same first name, and I ended up talking to her differently than I would have if she just sounded differently. It's interesting, and some days I'm goofy and stupid, and the episodes go that way. And some days I'm sad about my kid having diabetes like I am today, and it goes this way. And I'm very reflective right now because I've spent so much time with adults and caregivers with type one in person over the last couple of weeks, you would have got me after a vacation, we would have said some stupid and been laughing the whole time. So I'm sorry if it got weird for you. Today's episode is brought to you by Omnipod. We talk a lot about ways to lower your a 1c on this podcast, did you know that the Omnipod five was shown to lower a 1c that's right. Omnipod five is a tube free automated insulin delivery system, and it was shown to significantly improve a 1c and time and range for people with type one diabetes when they switched from daily injections. My daughter is about to turn 21 years old, and she has been wearing an Omnipod every day since she was four. It has been a friend to our family, and I think it could be a friend to yours. If you're ready to try Omnipod five for yourself or your family, use my link now to get started omnipod.com/juicebox get that free. Omnipod five Starter Kit today. Terms and Conditions apply. Eligibility may vary. Full terms and conditions can be found at Omnipod comm slash Juicebox. You can manage diabetes confidently with the powerfully simple Dexcom g7 dexcom.com/juicebox the Dexcom g7 is the CGM that my daughter is wearing. The g7 is a simple CGM system that delivers real time glucose numbers to your smartphone or smart watch. The g7 is made for all types of diabetes, type one and type two, but also people experiencing gestational diabetes. The Dexcom g7 can help you spend more. Time in range, which is proven to lower a 1c The more time you spend in range, the better and healthier you feel. And with the Dexcom clarity app, you can track your glucose trends, and the app will also provide you with a projected a 1c in as little as two weeks. If you're looking for clarity around your diabetes, you're looking for Dexcom, dexcom.com/juicebox, when you use my link, you're supporting the podcast, dexcom.com/juicebox head over there.

B 15:29
Now. No, no, it wasn't weird at all. Um, if this was apparently the what we needed to talk about and what whoever is going to listen needed to hear. So I am fine with the way that it went. Oh, I

Scott Benner 15:42
hope. I'm very hopeful that that's right. Thank you. I really don't know how to wrap my head around it, but I'll tell you a story instead. Okay, so I go to friends for life for the very first time. It's a couple 1000 people there. They're everywhere. It's crazy. There's an entire convention center overtaken by friends for life, not like some of it, or a wing of it, or a couple of rooms the entire place, like it's Disney's, it's a Coronado Springs. Maybe, I'm not sure exactly the name of the hotel. I was only there for a week. People everywhere, adults, kids, parents, siblings, vendors, companies, you know, like people you would think of as being cold and selling devices, but you sit and talk to them in a corner, a lot of them have type one diabetes, too, and a lot of them are really touched by all this. There's a lot of emotion going on, but everybody at that hotel, I am not lying to you, is wearing a CGM or a pump. It's just it's everywhere, and the thing ends on Friday afternoon. My wife and I stay an extra day before we fly home, because we really never go on vacation. So we're not, you know, like, what are we going to do? We're, you know, we're adults. Like, we talked about going on a couple of rides, but it was super hot. My wife's like, listen, perfect day for me. We sleep in, get up, sit at the pool, go to dinner. And I was like, right on where it's sitting at the pool, and this gentleman comes up and sits in the chaise lounge to my left. So it's me, then Kelly, then a little space, then this gentleman sitting there, Andrew came over from one of the patch companies that a guy's been on the show before he makes over patches for his stuff. And we were chatting for a while, and I guess that guy probably overheard enough of that conversation that he turned to us and said, Hey, was there something going on at this hotel this week? And my wife laughed and told him, like, oh yeah, there was this giant convention here for people who have type one diabetes, and it's over now. So there's still some people here, but that's what you were seeing. So I've been here a couple days, and I thought I saw a lot of insulin pumps and stuff like that, and he pulls up his shirt or moves his towel or something, and he's wearing a CGM, and he says, I have type one diabetes. And I'm like, that's crazy. I'm like, you're at this hotel during this conference, sitting next to me, and you have type one, but you're not here for friends, for life. He wasn't there for it. He'd never heard of it. He doesn't know what it is. He doesn't know what I do for a living, right? So we chat a little longer. His wife is in the pool, like you know, at the side. We're all in a little circle, the four of us, and he says, Why were you guys here? And we told him, and his wife looks at me and says, What's the podcast called? And I said, Juicebox. And she gets all lit up, and she goes, my mom also has type one diabetes. She listens to your podcast. Oh, wow. Now, if it wasn't for friends for life, and I was still there, I would have been sitting next to somebody who has type one never known it because he was wearing one of those long shirts, and sitting next to a woman whose mother listens to my podcast, and I would have never known it. And we chatted for a half an hour, and he talked about wanting to do better for himself, and I told him about the Pro Tip series, and talked him through a little bit about what to do, and asked him a little bit if he ever considered taking his kid to trial net. And just, we just talked for a while, and maybe I'm wrong, because Arden tells me I'm wrong all the time, but so does Cole, and everyone tells me I'm wrong all the time, but I watched him make a decision to do better for himself. I watched it happen in his eyes, and I believe it's gonna happen for himself, not that he was doing poorly, but that he wanted to tighten things up. Last night, a woman popped into the Facebook group to tell me that I met her daughter and her son in law at the pool, and turns out she's not just a listener, but she's in the Facebook group, and that's crazy. First of all that I randomly sat down next to somebody who had no idea why anybody was there and ends up listening to my podcast like that's the thing I can't wrap my head. Around like I if that happened to the all of you, it would freak you out. Just trust me, it freaks me out, even though I know how many people are listening like the idea that me this dumb guy who's figured out how to buy a microphone and talk about this stuff, that I could be walking through the world next to somebody who, if I turned to them and said, Hey, that I could be walking through the world, and could turn to a group of people and go, Hello, friends, and one of them would look back at me and go, Oh my God, you're the guy from that podcast. Like, that's a mind. Be like, you have no idea, okay, that I think it's gonna help him, and that it's already helping his mom, and that I can't actually process any of that. I don't think I'm ever going to actually. It's a bigger thing that, you know, our kids are going to grow up with social media and their friends talking into their phones and everything. But I didn't grow up that way, and this is all weird to me, and it still is. So anyway, I don't know what the point of that is, but I just figured I had to tell somebody. So I'm telling you, that's the thing that happened on Saturday. There are days when I think like, it's crazy that I'm going to help all of these people, but the one person who like, I really want to help is the person who is set up by nature to think I don't know what I'm talking about. Isn't that crazy? So that she can pull away and be her own adult and go live her own life. Like, I understand how the progression works. It works the same way for everybody. But so back to your original point. Like, I don't know if Mr. Rogers kids thought he was a good guy or not, but you know, I'm working on it. Like, hopefully one day, hopefully one day they woke up and said that, Mr. Rogers guy was sorry. Did he really have kids that didn't like him? Where'd you hear that from?

B 21:49
Of course, the internet. Like, so, you know, I have to take that with a grain of salt. I'm not 100% sure that that's true, but when he passed a couple years ago, I remember that kind of coming out, but that's

Scott Benner 22:01
probably what's gonna happen. I mean, you know, you guys will all be running around with five, five, a, one, CS, and my daughter will be the one struggling, right? So I hope not, but I don't know.

B 22:13
No, you said that Arden, you know, is able to take care of herself. She'll, she'll get there. I mean, she's young. She's 21 they're gonna go through. You went through a phase of wanting the F off, and eventually you got your stuff together so she'll remember, she'll remember all the solid foundation that you have instilled in her, and she's gonna want to do that, even if it's, I don't know if she wants kids herself at some point, but a lot of times, having kids yourself, it should have figured out, because you're like, oh, I need to be here for my kid. So maybe that's the thing. I don't know, but I would, I wouldn't, I wouldn't worry.

Scott Benner 22:53
Yeah, I'm, oh, listen, I have to tell you. Like, generally speaking, I am not worried. And I really appreciate what you just said. I really do. I just, it's, like, I said earlier, like, it's still hard in the moment. Like, I'm not worried, but it's, you can't just be blase about it. You know what I mean? Like, I think that's what they mean when they they say, once you're a parent, you worry every day and it doesn't stop. Like, I think that's the thing. Like, I think I have mom guilt, you know what I mean? Yeah, and all the other stuff.

B 23:21
37 years old, and my mom is still like, why are you going over here? So I went to a event at touch by type one on last Sunday, because I just decided, like, I finally need some community around diabetes. I feel like I was doing it as, you know, an island, like nobody understands what I'm doing, what I'm going through. So I just went to this mom's Night Out event, and it was at 7pm and we live about an hour away, and my mom is like, wait, no, no, so you're gonna go over that night and then come back in the dark. I'm like, Mom, I'm like, almost 40 years old. I think I can drive myself there and get back

Scott Benner 23:58
your mom's like, you can't be driving at night. This is ridiculous,

B 24:02
yeah? Like, well, just because you don't like to drive at night, mom doesn't mean that I can't do it. So, yeah, I don't, I don't think you and I know, especially with my kid having the diabetes, I don't know how I'm gonna not worry about him until he's 97 and I've been dead for, you know, 30 years.

Scott Benner 24:24
Yeah, no. I mean, I watched it with my mom, like she got older and older and older and just kept worrying about us and like, you know, and you and I was pushing back against it as an adult, like, Mom, we're okay, don't worry about it. Like, even with your mom last night, you know, also, people should go to touch by type one.org. They have a lot of great stuff for people. The moms Night Out is one of them. I think the right thing to do is to hug your mom and go, I am so glad that you care about me like this. Thank you. I'm going to be okay. I promise don't please try not to worry about me. But, like, it's hard, right? Because you still are, like, I'm almost 40, like Lee. Me alone. I got this, you know what I mean, and then you are going to say something like that to your son 10 years from now, and he's going to do what you did to your mom, and you're going to be like, Why is he treating me like this?

B 25:10
Well, no, don't get me wrong, I still called her once I got over there, and then I called her when I was coming back.

Scott Benner 25:16
So yeah, that's going to make me cry. Now stop

B 25:19
it. I mean, you know we're besties. She's, she's the one watching the kid now, and so, you know we, We're BFFs. We, you know, we, we were yelling at each other earlier, but still,

Scott Benner 25:30
you made me cry. God damn it.

B 25:33
No, I'm not gonna even apologize for that, because you apparently needed to cry. So you, you go ahead and

Scott Benner 25:40
do that. Oh, you tell me, Arden is gonna call me one day and say, I say I got here. Okay, I'd be all right, I'll take that. I know I need a drink now. Rob's gonna have to edit out this ice. I hope you're happy.

B 25:53
No, don't edit out. You

Scott Benner 25:55
cried. No, leaving the crying. I'd say he's gonna have to edit out the ice when I take my drink. Oh, that part, yeah, every once in a while, he sends me a text that sounds like, like, I don't know the exact words, but here's how it feels to me. Just so Rob knows it feels like, hey, dumb, why don't you stop putting ice in a metal cup and drinking it while you're making a podcast.

B 26:15
You know, I drink a couple times, and I'm like, I hope they don't hear that. I don't have ice in it, but it's definitely a, you know, stainless steel Yeti, you know, of course, everybody has to have one of those things.

Scott Benner 26:25
Well, yeah. I mean, listen, what would the world be if we all didn't own a metal cup and then still buy bother environment, you know, how do you clean those straws? Bay, they Vex.

B 26:35
They have the little they have the little straw cleaner. I gotta buy a straw cleaner too. They use like it came, it came with the pack of straws when I went about it.

Scott Benner 26:45
This is a scam developed by the man to sell us straw cleaners. I think, Doesn't this feel like this is capitalism going crazy. First, I'll give them a cup they don't need. Then I'll put a straw in it they can't wash. Then I'll sell them a way to wash the straw. I mean, you know, we gotta make some money somehow. I gotta keep this train rolling. All right, I blubbered in this one. Did I stop you from saying anything you want to say?

B 27:10
No, I, no, I, what I wanted to say was just however the conversation went. But I do want to, you know, give you your flowers to just, just add to the group of people. If you more reflective, maybe you'll shed another tear later on. Thank you. Thank you for your podcast, and thank you for sharing the different stories that you share and just being vulnerable with what you share and how you present yourself on the podcast. I really appreciate it. I learned something every podcast that I listen to, and there's something of value that I'm able to bring into my life, even if it's about diabetes or literally just parenting or something. I always get something from an episode. So I really do appreciate that this is what you have chosen to do with your life. I know this wasn't the path that you wanted to take, but you are making the best of it, and I really do appreciate all that you do.

Scott Benner 28:14
Thank you so much. That's really nice. I'm not even gonna say something stupid, because it meant a lot to me, and I am really feeling this all today.

B 28:22
Good, good, yes, yeah, nice. You know, emotional cancer season. I'm, I'm a cancer baby too. So I get it.

Scott Benner 28:29
Oh, yeah, trust me, I think if you pressed me, I wouldn't tell I tell you I don't believe in that at all. But, man, being born in July and being a cancer like I really do, like, I don't know. I just watch other people, and they're not as emotional as I am, you know, and it's hard. And Arden's, by the way, born in July, too. So, yeah, it's nice, but until we, until we get involved in something, you know, that makes us both feel emotional. And then it's, you know, the show,

B 28:56
yeah, my son wasn't born in July, but he's a Pisces, which is another, like, water sign and, oh my gosh, it's like, can be so emotional? Like, oh my gosh, kid, please.

Scott Benner 29:06
I'm gonna have to say, maybe I do believe in it, because I don't know. I watch other guys talk about stuff, and some of them are just so like, like, stoic all the time. But they seem fine. By the way, I'm fine. Like, I'm not, like, if anybody's listening to this, being like, Oh my God, this guy's unhinged. You know what I mean? Like, I'm I'm really okay. I'm not day to day. I'm not burdened by this. It's just I really feel it while it's happening. Like, it just it makes me feel a certain way. And I don't fight it off, like, just, like, let it happen. You know? I also don't go the opposite way and turn into, like, a, like a lunatic, you know, who's just like, oh my god, I can't handle any of this. I can handle it fine. I just, I want to feel it. Do you know what I mean?

B 29:43
As you should, and I'm glad that you know that you should, yeah, because we were giving them the various emotions on purpose to be

Scott Benner 29:51
able to feel them. Well, I'm using all

B 29:56
the bottle, all of that inside. I think that causes additional issues. Shootings and disease and all that. If you're, you're keeping things in, you need to get it out. Yeah, sure. It might not mean that you get it out in front of your boss at work. No, but going, you can go in your car, you know, afterwards you hold it for five minutes, and then go to a safe space, and then you, you go ahead and do what you need to do. But, yeah, yeah, my husband's always like, Oh, I cry inside. I'm like, dude, yeah,

Scott Benner 30:24
it's okay to cry outside sometimes too. I know it just made me so happy when you said you called your mom afterwards. And meeting these people, like, all week long, you know, from, you know, people telling you how valuable this has all been for them, or what it's changed for them. And, you know, telling, you know, saying, I love you to a stranger, like that kind of thing. And just like at one point on the opening night of friends for life, they open up the vendor floor, basically. And I had a booth there, and it ran for three hours. And for three solid hours, there were so many people standing in front of me that they were going across the aisle to the like, the booth on the other side was kind of like, Hey, what the hell you know what I mean? Like, because the backs of my of the people waiting in line, and I would look up, and at first I was so I felt really pressured, but I didn't want to rush the person I was speaking with, because someone was coming to say something very personal, and to thank me or to share what the podcast had done, or what the Facebook so many people talked about the Facebook group and how valuable that was for them.

B 31:28
Oh, I'm always typing something in in the Facebook group and looking for posts that relate to it all the time. So I

Scott Benner 31:35
didn't want to rush the people who were in front of me, but I was trying not to make people like wait forever. And I thought I kept a good balance of it, but I just got a note last night from somebody who said I tried over and over again for three days to come speak with you, and I could never find your table not full of people. I took a lot away from that experience. Like I really to expand on it for five more seconds. I really do just sit here making this podcast right? Like, I think about how I feel, I think about what I see you guys talking about. I try to decide how to make content that I think will help you with management. I do my best there, and I do my best to have conversations with people, to illuminate how they're feeling and what they're thinking. And hopefully you'll find some sameness in that. Like, but I do it all in a room. I'm by myself, and I don't get any feedback on it really. You know, when you do get bad feedback, it's like, once in a great while, or from a handful of people, and you're like, you know, three people this week, this month, think I'm an asshole. And, you know, 350,000

B 32:35
pay attention to it. 350,000

Scott Benner 32:38
people think that if I saw you somewhere, I'd line up and wait a half an hour just to say thank you to you. And half of you is like, Well, I'm a bad person. Like, like, because this person thinks I'm a bad person. And, I mean, like, somebody said, What was the last one that was in my that got to me? Like, made it to me. Because people, by the way, they're trying to help you, and they send you stuff, and I'm like, I don't need to see this. Thank you. That's why I don't look at it. Some woman said that I'm a cult leader. Oh, okay. And I was like, all right. But then, like, you look up and there's 75 people standing in line waiting to talk to you, and you go, like, maybe, maybe, yeah. Like, it's a nice cult, at least, yeah. But you know, it's just, it's, I don't know, it was great. And anyway, so my point should have been that sitting in this room, I only measure what I do with numbers like downloads and listen through rates and things that are like kind of cold in the way that podcasts are measured, like, what keeps me in that top 20, 3040, of my of the medicine category for seven, eight years, like, it's nude listeners, like people who have such a good experience that they tell someone else, and that person starts to listen, also has a good experience, keeps listening and eventually tells somebody else, like, that's how I measure myself. And I just walked away from this experience on the ship and at friends for life. And I told myself, I am going to start measuring my success by those people and how happy they are and how healthy they are, and not about those numbers like I am going to try to take those numbers and put them in a part of my brain. That's just the business side of this. The thing that has to happen so that more advertisers want ads so that you guys keep getting podcasts, like, that's one thing, but I gotta stop judging myself on that. Like those numbers are not who I am. I think those people's stories are who I am. If that makes sense,

B 34:33
yeah, it makes perfect sense, and I'm glad that you're going to look at it in a different way, because you are impacting so many different lives in a really good way that those numbers and those few far in between negative comments, they shouldn't matter. And another thing that I wanted to say was, or maybe even ask you, why do you. I always say, like, Oh, I'm, you know, I just have this high school diploma. Or, like, I didn't graduate this. Or, you know, this dumb guy, like, why do you, why do you do that? You know, because what you what you do, is important. All of that, how your education or not, that doesn't matter. If you have a way of being able to explain things or break things down in a way that people can understand. It's important I appreciate

Scott Benner 35:27
that I'll try to answer your question, like, as best as I understand it, as best as I understand myself, I mean, I've always just thought, like I just grew I was a fat kid growing up, and like, self deprecating humor was, like, a way around that to some degree, like, you know what I mean, and I also don't have, I don't think people will listen. Like, if I was high minded and I was coming from, like, Hey, I'm like, a, like, I'm a well educated, like, blah, blah, blah. Like, you know, like, I think people don't want that. Like, so I don't know if maybe that's maybe my way of deflecting when people are are complimenting me to some degree, and if it's also not, maybe my way of making sure that you don't feel like somebody's talking at you Sure. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I don't want people to feel like they're in school when they're listening. And I think it helps if you just know the truth about me, like I really I barely graduated from high school. I've taken one college course in my entire life to see if I could do it. I got an A in it, and I was like, Oh, I guess I could have done it. Then I didn't go back. I wasn't my intention to go to college. I am disappointed that I didn't go I think I would have enjoyed the person I might have been if I would have got, like, a classic education after high school. But I don't know there's something about this self deprecating humor that I think, honestly, just connects to how I looked growing up and how I felt about like that. I tried really hard through my adulthood to think of myself as my thoughts, not as my body or how I appeared. But I'll tell you this, I got off the plane on Sunday morning, and it was one of those airports where you land and get just out of the plane right there, like you go down the stairs, off the plane, onto the tarmac, and you walk inside. There was this long building with these giant plate glass windows, and I was just wearing a white sweatshirt and sweatpants, like black sweatpants, and you know, I was, you know, trying to be comfortable on the plane. And I'm walking off, I've got my backpack on, I look over because there's a cop holding, like this, like, serious looking gun. And I was like, what's that about? And it made me turn my head, look towards the building, and I saw my reflection. And for 10 steps, I watched myself walk, and I thought I finally looked like a regular person. I wasn't thin, I wasn't fat, I wasn't ugly, I wasn't handsome, I just looked like everybody else. I was like, Finally, like. I was so glad to just blend in with everybody as we were walking, and that made me realize that I didn't feel that way about myself before, and like I had a white sweat i got bright white sweatshirt on two years ago. You could not have paid me a million dollars. Oh, my

B 38:17
God, I understand. Yeah, I was a kid as a child too. So yeah, and up until high school. So I, I, trust me, I get that whole

Scott Benner 38:26
million years, million years. You I wouldn't put that sweatshirt on for for money or love. I wouldn't have put it on. I don't know. I just looked over and I was like, I just look like an average living, standing, walking person getting off of a plane. So I think maybe the self deprecating stuff comes from that, you know, I don't know. I also don't want to. I don't feel the other way, like, I guess, I don't feel like I'm so smart and you should listen to me. I don't know why the hell you guys are listening. You know what I mean? Like, I can't. I mean, I know what you tell me, but,

B 39:01
well, yeah, I think, I think we've told you plenty of time. No, no,

Scott Benner 39:05
no, I appreciate it. I understand. But like, I guess it's possible that I don't know. Maybe I'm not the kind of person I would have listened to. I don't know exactly, I guarantee you, I don't know the answer. I'm just talking out loud trying to find it. But anyway, somewhere in there is probably the answer, sure.

B 39:24
Well, thank you for sharing that and and trying to answer it. And I think you did. I understand me. Yeah, I don't. I wouldn't want to listen to myself either. I get it. One thing you mentioned about the, I think, in the opposite way you said about, you know, not having barely graduating from high school, and then, like, I've gone and gotten to, like, doctor, like, I, like, I barely tell anybody that, like, barely, because, like, I don't like people knowing that, because, you know, then they'll, you know, treat you to. Different, or expect you to know things or ask you questions, and I'm like, I can't tell you the answer to that. You need to talk to your own doctor, you know? Yeah. So I get it in the in the exact opposite way, that it's just not something that

I'm sure I'm proud that I did it, but I'm just B, yeah,

Scott Benner 40:21
that's how I feel, like I grew listen, I grew up in a very blue collar household, and we were very poor, and my parents were not like overly educated people. They went to high school in the 50s, you know, and and the 60s, and that was the extent. My dad worked in our a rubber molding plant, and my mom had a part time job folding clothes in a clothing store where, basically, like parochial school kids came to buy their uniforms. And, you know, I'm adopted, and I don't really talk about this on the podcast very often, but I have a really, really high IQ, but I don't know anything. I'm bad at math. I'm I don't have a great memory about facts, like I I don't know, but my IQ has been tested throughout my life. God, B, you got me today. I don't think I've ever said this on the podcast. My IQ has been tested a number of times throughout my life, and it always comes back at the same number, and it's it's shockingly high, and yet, I don't understand algebra, and I don't think in a million years, you could teach it to me, and I still wonder if I'm putting commas in the right place. So I think I'm smart enough to know that I'm I think I'm smart enough to know about the things I don't understand and and that stops you from being very confident sometimes. Does that make sense?

B 41:50
It does. Yeah. So

Scott Benner 41:53
that's it. I'll tell you when we when we get off, what the number is, but I'm not telling everybody else is even that embarrassed. Even that embarrasses me. Sorry, everyone. Yeah, I tried, and I don't want people who are you gonna try to get my middle name out of me next B, what's going on? I know you don't share that either. No one's getting that. And, by the way, it's the internet. You could know in three seconds if you really want to know. So I appreciate the people who don't look but it's just a weird name. I don't feel like that number, and I never have but and I I'm also disappointed that I didn't hone it with college, because I do wonder where I'd be today if I did have a firmer understanding of things. Yeah, that makes sense, so I'm smart enough to be inquisitive if that makes sense. But I don't know if I'm smart enough to come up with the answers, but I do think that while we talk about them, you all get to you get to figure it out. While we're while we're wondering out loud about stuff, if that makes sense, it does. Yeah, cool. I appreciate it. All right. I'm gonna let you go, because right now, Rob's like, Oh, it's just an hour and a half. Scott, so that's okay, Rob, we're still gonna call it heavy. And to the rest of you, I'm gonna hang up now and tell b what my IQ is. So if I find this online, we know b spilled the beans. I'm not gonna do it all right, thanks for doing this with me. I really appreciate it. Pre

this episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by Omnipod five. Omnipod five is a tube, free, automated insulin delivery system that's been shown to significantly improve a 1c and time and range for people with type one diabetes when they've switched from daily injections, learn more and get started today at omnipod.com/juicebox at my link, you can get a free starter kit right now. Terms and Conditions apply. Eligibility may vary. Full terms and conditions can be found at omnipod.com/juicebox Dexcom sponsored this episode of The Juicebox podcast. Learn more about the Dexcom g7 at my link, dexcom.com/juicebox

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#1638 Heavy - Part 1

You can always listen to the Juicebox Podcast here but the cool kids use: Apple Podcasts/iOS - Spotify - Amazon Music - Google Play/Android - iHeart Radio -  Radio Public, Amazon Alexa or wherever they get audio.

B is  the mom of a T1D son who was diagnosed at 16 months. He is currently 2 and they are about 9 months into managing diabetes. Part 1 of 2.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Welcome back friends to another episode of The Juicebox podcast. Hi.

B 0:14
My name is B. I am a mom to a T 1d son who was diagnosed at 18 months. He is currently two, and we're about nine months into this diabetes game.

Scott Benner 0:26
If this is your first time listening to the Juicebox podcast and you'd like to hear more, download Apple podcasts or Spotify, really, any audio app at all, look for the Juicebox podcast and follow or subscribe. We put out new content every day that you'll enjoy. Want to learn more about your diabetes management. Go to Juicebox podcast.com. Up in the menu and look for bold Beginnings The Diabetes Pro Tip series and much more. This podcast is full of collections and series of information that will help you to live better with insulin. Please don't forget that nothing you hear on the Juicebox podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan or becoming bold with insulin. The episode you're about to listen to was sponsored by touched by type one. Go check them out right now on Facebook, Instagram, and, of course, at touched by type one.org check out that Programs tab when you get to the website to see all the great things that they're doing for people living with type one diabetes. Touched by type one.org This episode is sponsored by the tandem mobi system, which is powered by tandems, newest algorithm control iq plus technology. Tandem Moby has a predictive algorithm that helps prevent highs and lows, and is now available for ages two and up. Learn more and get started today at tandem diabetes.com/juicebox I'm having an on body vibe alert. This episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by ever since 365 the only one year where CGM that's one insertion and one CGM a year, one CGM one year, not every 10 or 14 days ever since cgm.com/juicebox Hi.

B 2:19
My name is B. I am a mom to a T 1d son who was diagnosed at 18 months. He is currently two, and we're about nine months into this diabetes

Scott Benner 2:31
game. Wow, currently two, nine months in. Do you have other children? Nope, this is the only

B 2:38
one I say that diabetes is my second kid. We actually were gonna, we were thinking about having another, but he got the diabetes. And I was like, oh, okay, you wanted to be an only child. I understood.

Scott Benner 2:49
Maybe we'll do this instead for a while. Yeah, hold on a second. Arden is asking me why the dog is all wet. Oh, we were outside in the grass. I think he's up in her room. I think she wants to make sure

B 3:02
that you like, always just leave those little, those little parts in the podcast is like, it makes it just like a

Scott Benner 3:09
real thing. Oh, I'm glad. So, okay, let's talk about, how did you figure out? I'm sorry, your son or your daughter, son, son. How did you find out? Figure out your son was what was I gonna say? How did you figure

B 3:21
out? Yeah, so I have a, you know, was in my former life, prior to becoming a mom, was a pharmacist, so I just kind of mom instinct to notice that he was drinking a lot, the standard, peeing all through the diapers, wetting the diapers every night. And you know, when you have a kid, they get older and older, you start using less diapers. But I was noticing, Hey, I've been going back to, like, newborn days, changing diapers all the time. What is going on? Yeah, always wanting to eat, constantly asking for my food, my husband, my mom's food, all the time, always wanting something to drink. And I'm like, What is wrong with this kid? Of course, I didn't immediately correlate it to that. So like everyone else, I go to Dr Google. Hey, why is my kid pink? And then it's like, oh, it might be type one diabetes. And I'm like, Oh no.

Scott Benner 4:14
And so did you take Dr Google seriously when it said that?

B 4:17
I did? Yeah, it doesn't mean it made sense. Like I said, I I have some previous medical background, so once it reminded me of that, I was like, oh, no, yeah, that is

Scott Benner 4:28
what it is. What'd you do? First you go to your was your husband? Did you go to him? Or what'd you do?

B 4:32
Yeah? Yeah. So I went to my husband, told him, Hey, I'm gonna take the kid to somewhere up to we have, like, a little emergency, a children's emergency department just down the street, probably, like, five minutes away. So I'm gonna take him here, but I'm pretty sure this is what it is. And he's like, Well, no, maybe it's a UTI. You know, the same thing that all parents like, like, no, no, it's probably just a UTI or something like that. But sure, take him. I'm like, it's diabetes. Husband, like, that is what it is. And he's like, no, just take him. He. He goes off to work and, you know, he just let me know my mom and I go to the emergency, of course, you know, his glucose is like, 600 and they're like, oh my gosh, you know, like, I think it's, you know, this type one diabetes. I'm like, oh, you know, of course, I already knew that's what it was. But then when you get there and they tell you, that's what it is. You're just like, oh my gosh, yeah, what am I gonna really hit you? And how old is he again? So he's two now, but he was 18 months at the time, and

Scott Benner 5:29
that's even a little, I mean, not big, more or less heartbreaking, but he's so small, right? And sitting there in front of you, yeah, you beat us by like, seven months. Arden was, oh, like, about a month after second birthday. Congratulations. Thanks. Are you in the ER at that point? Yeah.

B 5:47
So we're in the ER there, you know. Okay, well, let's do all of the blood gasses and things and see if he's in DK. You know, he didn't look like he was because he was fine. So we didn't, you know, we didn't get to the DK part. But, like, let's just see if he has the ketones and all that he did. So, you know, they were like, Okay, let's put in an IV so that we can try to flush these things out. Of course, putting in the IV was one of, you know, most traumatizing things that you know a parent can witness. You know, you're having to hold him down while he's staring at you in your eyes, and it's like, Mom, why are these people doing these things to me? You know, he's crying. So traumatizing. So, you know, they give the blues, try to flush them out, and then the ER doc comes back, tells us what is going on. Says, Hey, I called this Endo. That's like, a little bit down the road. We're actually going to send you over there, because she said, if you can get there by noon, she'll be able to see you today. Get you all set up, get you some prescriptions for insulin and all that. I'm like, okay, but great, wonderful. We don't have to go get admit it great. So they pull this IV that took, you know, 30 minutes for them to put in, pull it out. We run over to this in those office and then the lady's like, Wait, why are you here? I'm like, but no, no, they called and then they told you that we were coming. Well, yeah, but I thought that you guys had been admitted on the floor for a couple of days, and then you were coming after a hospital stay, like you just came from the ER, yes, oh no, no, no, no, you got to go back to the emergency like, I can't see you. I don't have enough time to do the education right now. I thought you already had seen the dietitian, seen the, you know, diabetes educator and all that. And I'm like, wait,

Scott Benner 7:32
what? Yeah, oh, my God, did you have to go back and they had to put the IV back in? Yes, yeah, really.

B 7:39
And it was even worse the second the second time, and I think four people had to try to put it in. And the last time, I was like, if you guys could not figure this out, this, I'm not letting you do it. I'm you. You are not putting this in, like, because, again, I'm out there trying to put him in a, you know, the little burrito thing. I'm like, he doesn't, he don't care about that. He's trying to break free. He's never liked to be swaddled as a kid or anything. So, yeah, they're putting it in. Eventually, they got somebody that knew what they were doing, used a little ultrasound machine and was able to find a vein, but I can still see, you know, how he was staring at me and screaming, and I'm trying to hold them down and talk to them and say, like,

it's okay, I'm so sorry. Oh, yeah, still, still have some you're on set

Scott Benner 8:27
by it now, thinking about it, yeah, yeah. And you're never gonna, I mean, I hate to say this, but the truth is the truth, right? Like, you're never gonna know how it impacted him, like you might find out years from now, but in the moment, it's gonna seem like it's okay, but who knows if he'll have an aversion to that, or if he'll just go by and not be a big deal for him. They have to wait, and then you have to worry about that, like you have to wait and worry about whether that's going to be an issue too. You know what? I mean? Yeah, you don't have enough other things to worry about. You're not busy enough be right, yeah. So how long do you end up staying in the hospital?

B 9:01
Okay, so here's another funny thing that's not funny. And we ended up staying six days in the hospital because it happened right when there was a hurricane coming through. We live in Florida, Central Florida, and there was a hurricane Milton, if anybody from Central Florida remembers that, that that's what came through. And so they didn't want to send us home because, oh, you're newly diagnosed, you know, you could lose power, all that kind of stuff. And then also, the the offices, the indos, were closed and right? We didn't have anybody that we could have called if, you know, he had a low or, you know, brand new diagnosis, so they just didn't feel comfortable. And then also, because it was Hurricane short, as the staffing was very short. So, you know, they started him on a sliding scale, and they just really couldn't figure it out, and they're trying to give him mashed potatoes. I'm like, this is not, you know. So, you know, he's 300 and they're no well, we don't feel comfortable sending you home because his numbers aren't well. Well, of course not. You're sliding skeleton in and then you're also trying to give him macaroni and cheese, like, come on, yes.

Scott Benner 10:07
But so instead, they thought, well, you'll, you'll be safer in the hospital, yeah, so you're there for much longer than you would have needed to be otherwise.

B 10:14
Yeah, yeah. We, it was a Monday morning, and that we got initially, took him in, came back, you know, that afternoon, after the whole endo ordeal, and then stayed until Saturday afternoon, I was like, come on, people like, please send me. Please send me home. I'm tired of this, and I'm trying to tell them, like, Hey, I I understand something. You know, I get, of course, I have never, like, poked my kid. And, you know, done. I've done glucose check the blood sugar before plenty of people, but not my kid, but I can do it like, please. Like, I'm okay, like,

Scott Benner 10:45
but maybe better off with the hurricane. And you guys give it a mash potatoes, macaroni and cheese, and tell me you can't figure out his blood sugar. Yeah, yeah. What did they ever get it straight in the hospital? Or did you just kind of wait out your time and then go home

B 10:59
straight where it was like two something, so, sure,

Scott Benner 11:03
not really, but, yeah, okay, whatever. Yeah, better than where it started. How would you describe where you are now? Like, I mean, it hasn't been that long, right? So what's the experience been like so far? How far have you gotten in all this?

B 11:18
I think we're pretty good in. I mean, of course, there's always still something else to learn. And I wish my kid, two year old child, didn't want to eat every five minutes. Because, like, I'm like, I would, I would love to have like, a, you know, six, a, 1c, but the way this kid just eats things every second. And yeah, but anyways, listening to the podcast, doing lots of reading. I, you know, I'm a researcher, and I love reading all of those types of things. So just learning everything I can to be able to dose him appropriately and make different changes to his insulin dosing, like I was Pre-Bolus in within like, the first week, even though the endo was like, no, no, even the hospital, Oh, yeah. Just, just give it to him after he started eating. No, we're not doing that. Yeah. Like, my kid loves to eat. So I trust that if he doesn't eat this, he'll eat this other thing that I know is an equivalent amount of carbs. So, you know, I think we're in a good, enough place. We're currently on Omnipod now, but I transitioned him over to the Moby just for a little bit tighter control, and it's less work from me, because I yeah, I do. I feel

Scott Benner 12:37
like that might help you there. Yeah, I want to go back to you. Said you like I was pre bolusing. Right away you were finding out, you know, you said you like to do research and stuff like, so what gave you the indication that you needed to go look for more information?

B 12:49
Well, just my own curiosity. That's just me as a person. If there's something that I want to learn about or need to learn about, I'm not going to just take the Pink Panther book that they give you and have that be the only thing that gotcha. I learned from or whatever the Indo says, which is the two words that they they tell you, No, I let me find out something else. I even actually remember sitting, I think it was the same, either first or second night in the hospital. I'm like, there has to be a podcast or something that talks about type one diabetes, that I can learn something to help me with this, because I need, I need some additional education, because I just don't feel comfortable here.

Scott Benner 13:36
You started thinking about that stuff right away, like there's got to be other there's content out there something I can figure out. So how old are you? How old am I? I'm 37 Okay, so you're younger. Okay, so podcasts are a thing you think of when you

B 13:48
Oh, yeah, I listen to podcasts every single day about various different topics, podcasts and YouTube. That's how I that's how I learned,

Scott Benner 13:57
yeah, it's where you get people's stories right and figure out what's uh and then you What do? You What do you filter through it and decide what makes sense to you?

B 14:04
Yeah, I went on YouTube first, just because, you know, sometimes visually you can work a little bit, but I just couldn't, I didn't find it there, and then I was okay, well, let's just go to podcast, because we can listen there and still learn it. And found you and a couple others, and they, you know, definitely helped. And what was being said, it made sense. Let's try it out.

Scott Benner 14:24
Yeah, and you got it working. That's awesome. So now you're just nine months into this. So yes, where's is a 1c sitting right at the moment. Why would you settle for changing your CGM every few weeks when you can have 365 days of reliable glucose data. Today's episode is sponsored by the Eversense 365 it is the only CGM with a tiny sensor that lasts a full year sitting comfortably under your skin with no more frequent sensor changes and essentially no compression lows. For one year, you'll get your CGM data in. In real time on your phone, smartwatch, Android or iOS, even an Apple Watch, predictive high and low alerts let you know where your glucose is headed before it gets there. So there's no surprises, just confidence, and you can instantly share that data with your healthcare provider or your family. You're going to get one year of reliable data without all those sensor changes, that's the ever sense. 365 gentle on your skin, strong for your life. One sensor a year, that gives you one less thing to worry about. Head now to ever since cgm.com/juicebox to get started, let's talk about the tandem mobi insulin pump from today's sponsor tandem diabetes care, their newest algorithm control iq plus technology and the new tandem mobi pump offer you unique opportunities to have better control. It's the only system with auto Bolus that helps with missed meals and preventing hyperglycemia, the only system with a dedicated sleep setting, and the only system with off or on body wear options. Tandem Moby gives you more discretion, freedom and options for how to manage your diabetes. This is their best algorithm ever, and they'd like you to check it out at tandem diabetes.com/juicebox when you get to my link, you're going to see integrations with Dexcom sensors and a ton of other information that's going to help you learn about tandems, tiny pump that's big on control tandem diabetes.com/juicebox, the tandem mobi system is available for people ages two and up who want an automated delivery system to help them sleep better, wake up in range and address high blood sugars with auto Bolus.

B 16:45
Last time we checked, it was, I think, a 680 that's awesome.

Scott Benner 16:49
Good for you. That's really great. And he's, what, a little over two now, two and a half.

B 16:54
Yeah, he turned two in March, so, and it's what currently July is, for context, for anybody listening, three months in the future.

Scott Benner 17:02
Yeah, that's, well, that's so, how do you think he's so you're doing? Okay, how's he doing?

B 17:07
Oh, he's doing great. Yeah. So, oh, yeah. So we started before we got the pump. I took it, I think about a month for us to get the pump. But before we did that, we were, of course, MDI and again, more trauma, thinking about it took two of us to have to give him the shots. You'd have to, like, hold him down and hold his leg and make sure he doesn't kick to try to shoot it. And then sometimes he'd move, and then he wasn't you weren't sure how much insulin you actually gave him. And, oh yeah, this so getting the pump.

Scott Benner 17:38
This sounds familiar, by the way, I have those memories, because

B 17:41
everything I remember, uh, Arden was four years in di

Scott Benner 17:45
Right, yeah, she, well, she was diagnosed when she was two, and we had a Omnipod on her before she went to kindergarten. So I don't exactly know how old she was then, but going into kindergarten, she was wearing a pump.

B 17:58
So a couple, a couple years now, at least three, I think, oh, gosh, yeah, I can't even, like, it was a couple weeks and I'm like, I, I'm not going to be able to do this. He did fine with the finger pokes. He you know, he'd be like, Oh, you don't poke my finger. You know, thought it was cute, but the spokes for the food, he was not having

Scott Benner 18:18
it. Yeah, I spoke to somebody recently who said that they started off by saying that their kids a 1c was better on MDI, and then the more I spoke to them about it, the more I it became kind of obvious the kid wasn't always eating when they were hungry because they were trying to avoid the shots. So it wasn't so much that and because, but it was interesting as we conversated, because the mother thought, I mean, the way she presented it to me was that pumping is not as good as MDI, because she has her a one CS going up. But what's the truth is, is the kid, the child, is actually eating now, like when they mean to and before, they were skipping meals and skipping certain things to avoid getting an injection, and she didn't realize that it was, it

B 19:02
was happening, wasn't food, wasn't punishment. Basically, it's like, oh, I have to, you know, be injured first before I can eat. So I'm like, I'm gonna make sure I'm really, really hungry. Yeah, and endure

Scott Benner 19:13
this, exactly what was happening. And the mom didn't know, know it until we, I think we spoke, talk through it. So, I mean, yeah, for the people who it's hard for it's really, genuinely hard for them, you know? Yeah, yeah. So it is really rough. So you're pretty new at this, but what's the toll been on you? Like, what's the emotional side of tracking carbs and chasing highs and guarding against lows and overnights? How is it treating you?

B 19:39
Oh, so, like, I haven't slept the full night since, you know, he was born. You know, I thought I was gonna, you know, grow out of that at some point, but then he got the diabetes, and I'm like, oh, okay, well, I guess I won't, you know, sleep it's I have a therapist because, you know, we need those, but I definitely do about 90. 9.8% of all of the diabetes things. So it is very much a a huge toll and mental burden for myself. I'm getting glucose alerts now, and I'm like, Ah, he needs him, and I need to go send him some but I'm in here, so I can't so it's, it's, it's a lot, and it's very, very mentally taxing. And I wish it was a way to be able to explain to others how much of a huge mental burden and physical burden, actually, that it takes on the parent, and then you're also thinking about, like, the long term complications and issues that, like, if I'm not over here, micromanaging This is my kid gonna not have his toes when he's 20, you know? So it's a lot, but I have a therapist, and I really recommend that for for everybody, if you can, because, you know, you need it. You need that unbiased person to talk to you and just be like, let you express yourself in whatever way, if it's frustration or happiness or whatever, and not how you know your mom or your husband might be like, Oh, you're doing great. Like, this is getting people sure, but I like want to shoot myself. You know, when people

Scott Benner 21:22
tell you you're doing great, that's not comforting.

B 21:26
No, no, no. See, here was another thing that I actually wanted to talk about. Is like I mentioned before, previous life was a pharmacist, and one thing that, anytime I tell anybody that my son has type one diabetes, their first thing out of their mouth is, oh, my goodness. Is so great that, like you're his mom. Because, for some reason, because I'm a pharmacist, I just clearly know how to treat a kid with type one diabetes, like, of course, I know the different drugs. I learned all of those things. I know how to take a blood sugar and all of that, but the day to day management, especially in a super young toddler that's running around flipping over here, they're eating every half a second, it is not, it's not the same. And they don't, they don't understand it. And it really bothers me when people say that, like, oh, just because I have this medical background that I'm just automatically supposed to know what to do with my kid.

Scott Benner 22:25
Yeah, it sucks, because you kind of understand where they're coming from. They're trying to be, like, upbeat, and they're like, oh, at least you know about it, and that kind of thing. And you're like, that doesn't help at all. But thank you. Some of the people that I've seen struggle the most have medical backgrounds. I've seen doctors, researchers, nurses, lots of different people with medical backgrounds who are completely flummoxed by diabetes, just like everybody else. You know, yeah,

B 22:50
it all just puts us in the same little basket. Doesn't matter

Scott Benner 22:54
if you have, yeah, good point. We all, we all go back to start when this happens, whether you're a type one, or a parent of somebody like, it resets you, doesn't? It almost doesn't matter what you know sometimes,

B 23:06
like, Sure, I've heard Atlantis before and Humalog, of course, and I know what they do and how they work, but how do they work in my little 18 month old? Yeah, I don't know. Or how am I supposed to

Scott Benner 23:17
think about it at four o'clock in the morning when I haven't slept all night for 567, days in a row. Yeah. What do you do with that when they tell you, do you take it to your therapist later, or do you speak to them about it in the moment when they tell you, like, oh, at least you're a pharmacist.

B 23:32
Took it to my therapist. Actually had one person that I mentioned it to. He was actually a classmate, a pharmacist classmate. And I actually asked him, I'm like, what made you ask me that, or not necessarily ask me that, but what made you say that to me? Because I felt comfortable enough with him to ask, ask that, and he just was just like, you know, I don't even remember what his explanation was. It kind of made sense at the time, but maybe it didn't, because I don't remember what it was, but most of the time, I just take it to my therapist and let

Scott Benner 24:05
her, you know, tell me it's fine. Do you think that's them being insulting, but not direct, not on purpose? Or do you think it's you being like, I don't know, touchy about it, like? Do you mean like? Because I'm trying to figure it out, too? It out too, when it happens to me. Like, is this, is this me overreacting, or is it them, you know, actually being coarse, because I don't think it's them, and I also wouldn't consider myself overreacting. Like, if you told me to sit down right now and really, like, unburden my soul about what it's like, even to this day with a 21 year old who has diabetes, like, I'm gonna sound like, I'm complaining pretty quickly. You know what I mean? Like, like, you're gonna be like, Oh, boohoo, Scott. Is it that bad? But like, you know, in certain moments, for certain things, it's terrible, like it really is, and it doesn't like, it doesn't magically get better because they get. Older, or because they know how to Bolus for themselves, or something like that information. Scott, thank you. No Sure, but you live your whole life knowing this is never gonna get any different, the honesty of it doesn't change, like you get better at maybe living through it, or, you know, like having it not impact you so visibly,

B 25:18
knowing the 17,000 things that you have to pack with you just to go up to the, you know, the library, yeah,

Scott Benner 25:24
yeah, or realizing that, I don't know, you've seen 1000 movies in the last 20 years, and every time you leave for the movie theater, somebody makes sure that there's insulin in a pump, because you don't want to be in the movie if the pump errors or something happens and you have to go home and miss the movie. But the truth is that that's only happened twice the entire time, but you still make sure every time, and the person you're saying it to is like, Why do you say this all the time? Like, why do you keep bringing this up? This never happens, but she doesn't remember the one time it did happen, and how upset she was that we had to leave, and how bad I felt because we had to leave, and how terrible it was to drag my son out of there and like, but she just thinks I'm paying too much attention to it. You know what I mean?

B 26:07
I'm sure they remember, you know, whatever movie that was. We didn't actually get to watch it because of my diabetes, or Arden's, you know, diabetes, yeah, yeah.

Scott Benner 26:16
And it just, and it's sad and it's upsetting and it's not. And if she was 50, and I was 75 and we were going to a movie. I think I'd probably think, Oh, do we have, like, some backup supplies with us, just in case, you know. And she's gonna look at me and go, like, I have five kids of my own here. And like, I don't need your help. But it doesn't stop you from, like, I don't know how to stop thinking about,

B 26:38
I think she'd be grateful if you actually had it, and it did happen. And you just like, yep, nope, here you go, I got it. We can just change it,

Scott Benner 26:44
right? It finally happened, yeah. But like, you know, in the meantime, like, no one's grateful that somebody's worrying about them. They just don't want people worrying about them, and you understand that, but they also don't know what it's like to be the parent and feel like that pressure, if that makes sense or not, but, oh,

B 27:05
trust me, it does. I try to tell my husband all the time about just all the many things that I'm having to think about and remember and juggle just to manage his, you know, his diabetes only for, you know, them to just give them something random. And I'm like, why is he 300 what happened? Oh, I just gave him some of my, you know, frosted flake milk.

Scott Benner 27:31
What? Just gave him milk with sugar melted it. It's awesome. You want to mention that Bolus for anything?

B 27:38
Oh, my gosh. You didn't know how much this, like, how much I do, and then you can ruin it, which is, like, one little thing, Oh, my goodness,

Scott Benner 27:48
yeah, yeah. It all starts over again. And yeah, well, I mean,

B 27:53
sorry you had, you had asked me that one question about whether or not I thought it was them or me. I will say sometimes I could maybe be a little bit sensitive in terms of, you know, I enjoyed being a pharmacist, but I actually chose to stop being a pharmacist prior to even having my son, but in anticipation of having him. So it could just be my own projections of people thinking like, Oh, why are you not doing that anymore or something? And, oh, you're choosing to stay home instead of doing this career that you know you went 1000 years to school for. So it could very much be my own,

Scott Benner 28:34
my own projection. I take your point. I really do. I don't know it's just hard. It doesn't I think it's different, but I don't think it's any less difficult than it was when she was two. Like, there's just different problems today, and now she's older, and I see her side of it, like, I don't want, like, you know what I mean? Like, I you know if it's about, like, you're always talking about this, and I'm like, Well, you need to do the thing. You know what I mean, like, and so I don't want to talk about this. Yes, you do. You love talking about I'm like, I hate talking about this. I was like, this the worst part of my day right now. Like, I don't want this at all. And if she was just 2021, years old, and the stuff was, like, you know, stuff that every kid goes through, that they come out the other side of, normally, I just say, Okay, it's part of the journey. But like when the journey is about health, and you're worried that it could hurt right now, hurt later, create a habit that you know will hurt somebody 20 years from now, whatever it is you're thinking about, I think it's two decisions, like you have two options, right? And neither of them are good. Like, am I going to ignore health right now and maybe all the things that I just said could come with it in the future, or am I going to put more of the value on harmony and be. Harmonious but unhealthy, or would I rather be healthy but less harmonious? Like, there's no good decision in there. And I do really think that at certain points in people's lives, those are the only two decisions, like, which one are we throwing away here? I don't know how to make the decision. I'm still not good at it.

B 30:20
Okay, so note to talk to my therapist on Thursday about this. Because, yeah, oh my goodness,

Scott Benner 30:27
yeah. Because I wish someone would have come and found me when Arden was two, and told me that this is, you know, as she gets older, it's going to be the biggest piece of the whole thing, and that no matter what I do, I'm going to be wrong, because if I choose harmony, when her health fails, she's gonna wonder why I didn't help her, and if I choose health, then when she's, you know, having a very real and human, you know, I don't know disengagement as you know how you disengage from your parents as you get older, right? You know, and like, they want to disengage, but they're gonna not know everything to do, so they're going to ignore stuff for a while, and so I let that happen, and then, you know, then we don't have the same relationship. I just honestly, I don't know the answer. I really don't,

B 31:13
yeah, you saying that actually reminds me of, I'm not 100% sure this is the true story, but I'm just going to say it anyway that, you know, Mr. Rogers, you know, how, like everybody, like all the kids, we all watched it when we was where we were little, yeah, and loved him. But then I hear that he didn't actually have a really great relationship with his own children, which is unfortunate. And just the story that you were saying about you being this, you know, diabetes influencer, guy and you know, know that whatever you know based off of raising Arden, that it could be a similar thing. Just you know, you trying to find this balance between the health and the harmony, but wanting to choose help more often can make your relationship with your daughter just not be as close and as strong as you would want it to be, because it's always about diabetes and not just about like,

Scott Benner 32:11
Yeah, her. I also think that I don't know that our relationship is less strong, but I think that in the background, it's always just alive in the background like she thinks I'm too worried about her health, and I think she's not worried quite enough about enough, right? And then somebody's gonna say, well, it's her decision, and that's all well and good. But you know, you're gonna put a 12 year old, a 15 year old, a 20 year old, in charge of that like they you know, that normally doesn't go so well. And I would, in any, almost any other walk of parenting, I would err on the side of like, just let them go make their own mistakes. They'll be okay. Like, this

B 32:55
one thing is like, yeah, you know, could be life or death here, yeah,

Scott Benner 32:59
this one thing feels really different. Also, like, your kid could be like, you know, they have their own personality too, obviously. So you could do one thing with one that works great, and, you know, go to somebody else that doesn't work at all. Like, maybe it's going to work great between you and your son and somebody else listening right now is going to do the same exact thing, and it's not going to go as well. And who knows? Like, I mean, people are still people. They're the variable in the in the whole thing. Like, I don't think I'm doing anything wildly wrong. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I mean, yeah, you're a kid, you know, you people have children. Know, Like, nothing you do ever works out exactly right. But you know nothing objectionable, but you don't know how it's being received on the other side. And even if you think it's going well, sometimes it's not, and you don't realize it, or sometimes it's going great, and you don't realize that either, it's just really difficult to raise children. And then you add this all to it, and it adds about six other levels that are difficult on top of it.

B 33:59
Yeah, the diabetes definitely wasn't part of the plan in my parenting journey, for sure, but yeah, what you were saying about I just really that's another kind of fear that I have about my relationship with my son as he gets older. I really want to remain close with him, and you know, and US him be able to come and tell me things and or at least tell his father, if it's you know, something that you know they need to speak about. But just bring things to us. But I also still want to make sure that he's in good health, and he has all of his limbs, and he can see, and it's just how I mean, is there any way to balance that sounds like what you were saying, that there really isn't a such thing as balance. In this regard,

Scott Benner 34:50
I don't know how to make the decision between, like, how do you ignore something? And I do it sometimes, by the way, right? Like, sometimes there's a blood sugar that really needs attention. And she's not giving it attention, and I don't say anything about it. And, you know, and sometimes, you know, you speak up and you get met with, I don't need your help, or, you know, something like that. And you know, you look and say, Well, I mean, your blood sugar has been elevated for five hours now. Like, I appreciate that. You don't. I appreciate you don't need that. You know what to do, but you're not doing it. So can

B 35:22
you do it, please? Then I'll happily Shut up

Scott Benner 35:25
exactly, yeah, to the point like, if Arden hears this in the future one day, this is the last thing I want to be talking about with you. And I know that when she hears that, she at this moment in her life, she doesn't believe me. But I promise future me and future Arden, like, I don't want to be talking about this. I don't want this. I don't want her to have diabetes. I don't want her to have a thyroid issue. I don't want to be worried about this. I don't want to, I don't want her to worry about it. I wish none of this happened. You know, this isn't something I want to talk

B 35:58
about. Yeah. I mean, if only I could have just, Okay, well, give it to me. I'll, I'll be fine, like, just let me, let me have the diabetes, and let my kid just run off and play and not worried about something stuck to them. Yeah, 24/7 I'll be the robot person.

Scott Benner 36:14
But I would do it just to get rid of the, the psychosocial part of it, like I would, I'd be happy to like, whatever. Like, you know, I know this is not how it works, but I take your point, and I'm right there with you, but I don't even know if that would sound insulting if she heard it like, you know what I mean? Like, I could take, I'd take this if I could. Maybe they're like, Well, I You can't, so it's pretty empty. You know what I mean? Like, there's and by the way, who knows? Like, like, I said, there's going to be plenty of people who make that decision, and their kids are going to just be like, All right, awesome, thanks. And some people rub up against stuff, and some people don't. I don't know why. You know? I mean, if you really listen to me on the podcast, I'm just trying to figure out how all of you think, so that I can hopefully have some answers when I've gotta talk to my own kid, you know, because I don't know, like, I don't know why. I mean, think back on your own life, right? Using a great example, I was 20 years old. I was at work. One day, some guy I worked with, some kid I worked with, came up to me and was like, Yo, I'm gonna be at your birthday party. And I was like, I don't know what you're talking about. So he's like, No, yeah, yeah. And he showed me the invitation, the whole thing, and I was like, Oh, my mom was throwing me a surprise birthday party for my 21st birthday. And it made me really uncomfortable. And to this day, I don't know why, and something about it really made me upset. And I asked my mom. I actually told my mom, like, you have to cancel this party. I am 54 on Saturday just passed. So that is 3141 51 they just 33 years later, I still feel terrible about it, like I don't know why I did that. You know, oh, telling your mom to cancel it, it'll make me cry. Me if I talk about it with you, like, I don't know why I did that, and I wish I could have taken it, but I've wished I could take it back for years and and that's not and there's no diabetes mixed in that, you know, it's just like, it's just the thing between me and my mom. And if you're out there telling your kids, like, hey, I need you to Pre-Bolus, and they have a disjointed reaction, like I had about that birthday, like, what do you do next? You know what I mean? Like, the birthday came and went. My mom was disappointed and she was sad, and eventually she probably got over it. I never got over it. It's been one of the bigger lessons of my adult life. Like, just, I don't know, I don't know why I did it, but I would never do it again. But at least it was a thing we could get past. It didn't come up again three hours later when I was hungry, and then three hours after that, and then the next day, and then at two o'clock in the morning, like, you know I'm saying, because when it's a

B 38:54
diabetes thing, once a year with a birthday, but diabetes, oh boy,

Scott Benner 38:58
I probably forgot about it two years later, she was probably still upset about it, like, and I don't know, I apologize to her as adults. And the truth is, I don't think she really remembered it the same way I did, you know. But my point is, is that when it's diabetes, you don't get, like, you don't get a year off in between talking about it, or get to forget about it, or something like that. It's going to come up again the next time the thing beeps, you know,

B 39:22
so I don't know,

Scott Benner 39:24
yeah, I don't want to bum you out. Am I bumming you out?

B 39:29
Oh, you know. Thank goodness we have therapy on Thursday. Because, um, oh, gosh, yeah. So apparently it just doesn't like, it gets better. Like, somebody asked me that the other day. He's like, Oh, does it get better? And he gets older, and I'm like, yes, and no, from my understanding, yes, you know, he can, I can explain to him what it is that I'm doing and why I'm doing it, and he'll understand. But also, you know, other things happen, other you know, there's hormone attitudes in him, you know, wanting to do it. Own thing. And so yes and no, yeah,

Scott Benner 40:04
it'll change. Sigh, yeah, do you say sigh? I did. That was awesome. So I was like, Oh, she's adding emojis to our conversation. This is awesome. Yeah. I mean, it changes. It continues to change. I'm I think I'm more talking about the parenting part of it. Like the closest, and I'm happy not to have any experience with this, I should probably knock on something, right? But, like, I imagine this sort of, like, if your children are have, like, a serious drug issue, right? Or there, or there's a real significant mental illness, something that, at the end, if not managed correctly, is going to end in a terrible way, but that you really don't have any actual power over I think that's the hardest thing about the diabetes once your kids get older, is the truth is, is you don't have any actual power over it. You can say something and hope that they listen. You can hope that you're right and hope they listen, but you don't. It's not like when they're seven. And you can just go, like, here, you know, take this and they go, okay, and then they do it. Like, that's the part that's like, I've already given away the idea that I have power over it. I know, I don't. I know that she's an autonomous person, like, she's not going to do anything she doesn't want to do, but like the part that doesn't go away is the part that doesn't go away. And for diabetes, it is like all the possible health outcomes and and for me too, just that it impacts how she feels and thinks every day, if it's not managed in a certain way. And other stuff too, like thyroid and stuff like that as well, stuff that you know degrades if you're not managing it, but you don't see it coming. At least with diabetes, you'll end up in DK in a month or a week or whatever, right? Like, but like, you stop taking your, I don't know, your thyroid medication, like, first two months, you'll probably be okay. And then, like, if things are gonna drift on you and drift on you, and you're not even gonna feel it happening when it happens, and then you're going to be burdened with all the problems that come with it, and, you know, etc, and so on. So anyway, like, I don't know if this is going to ring hollow for some people, but like, this feels like this to me. Feels like having like an addicted child, because you don't have any real power over it. People do what they want to do, and if it doesn't go well, the outcomes are dire, like that. To me, feels like diabetes parenting.

This episode was too good to cut anything out of but too long to make just one episode. So this is part one. Make sure you go find part two. Right now. It's going to be the next episode in your feed head now to tandem diabetes.com/juicebox and check out today's sponsor tandem diabetes care. I think you're going to find exactly what you're looking for at that link, including a way to sign up and get started with the tandem Moby system. I'd like to thank the ever since 365 for sponsoring this episode of The Juicebox podcast, and remind you that if you want the only sensor that gets inserted once a year and not every 14 days, you want the ever since CGM, ever since cgm.com/juicebox one year one CGM touched by type one sponsored this episode of The Juicebox podcast. Check them out at touched by type one.org on Instagram and Facebook. Give them a follow. Go check out what they're doing. They are helping people with type one diabetes in ways you just can't imagine. Thank you so much for listening. I'll be back very soon with another episode of The Juicebox podcast. If you're not already subscribed or following the podcast in your favorite audio app, like Spotify or Apple podcasts, please do that now. Seriously, just to hit follow or subscribe will really help the show. If you go a little further in Apple podcasts and set it up so that it downloads all new episodes, I'll be your best friend, and if you leave a five star review, ooh, I'll probably send you a Christmas card. Would you like a Christmas card? When I created the defining diabetes series, I pictured a dictionary in my mind to help you understand key terms that shape type one diabetes management, along with Jenny Smith, who, of course, is an experienced diabetes educator, we break down concepts like basal, time and range, insulin on board and much more. This series must have 70 short episodes in it. We have to take the jargon out of the jargon so that you can focus on what really matters, living confidently and staying healthy. You can't do these things if you don't know what they mean, go get your diabetes to find Juicebox podcast.com, go up in the menu and click on series if you're looking for community around type one diabetes. Check out the Juicebox podcast. Private Facebook group Juicebox podcast, type one diabetes, but everybody is welcome. Type one, type two. Gestational. Loved ones. It doesn't matter to me. If you're impacted by diabetes and you're looking for support, comfort or community, check out Juicebox podcast. Type one diabetes on Facebook. Hey, what's up, everybody? If you've noticed that the podcast sounds better and you're thinking like, how does that happen? What you're hearing is Rob at wrong way recording, doing his magic to these files. So if you want him to do his magic to you, wrong way. Recording.com, you got a podcast? You want somebody to edit it? You want Rob.

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#1637 Over Producer

You can always listen to the Juicebox Podcast here but the cool kids use: Apple Podcasts/iOS - Spotify - Amazon Music - Google Play/Android - iHeart Radio -  Radio Public, Amazon Alexa or wherever they get audio.

Alex, 33, diagnosed T1D at 11, shares scoliosis, teen diabulimia, and lactic acidosis. Now a nurse, witnessing NICU outcomes reshaped her care and motherhood plans, rejecting blame.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

COMING SOON

Please support the sponsors

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The Juicebox Podcast is a free show, but if you'd like to support the podcast directly, you can make a gift here. Recent donations were used to pay for podcast hosting fees. Thank you to all who have sent 5, 10 and 20 dollars!

Donate