#1611 Boxer Briefs

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Tara, 54, misdiagnosed as type 2 before her type 1 diagnosis, shares her journey with Monjaro, parenting two daughters, and life as an older parent.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends and welcome back to another episode of The Juicebox podcast.

Tara 0:14
My name is Tara, and I am a type one diabetic,

Scott Benner 0:21
if you're looking to meet other people living with type one diabetes, head over to Juicebox podcast.com/juice, cruise, because next June, that's right, 2026 June, 21 the second juice Cruise is happening on the celebrity beyond cruise ship. It's a seven night trip going to the Caribbean. We're going to be visiting Miami, Coco K, st, Thomas and st, Kitts, yeah, the Virgin Islands. You're gonna love the Virgin Islands. Sail with Scott in the Juicebox community on a week long voyage built for people and families living with type one diabetes. Enjoy tropical luxury, practical education and judgment, free atmosphere. Perfect day at Coco Bay St, Kitts st, Thomas five interactive workshops with me and surprise guests on type one, hacks and tech, mental health, mindfulness, nutrition exercise, personal growth and professional development, support groups and wellness discussions tailored for life with type one and celebrities, world class amenities, dining and entertainment. This is open from every age you know, newborn to 99 I don't care how old you are. Come out. Check us out. You can view state rooms and prices at Juicebox podcast.com/juice cruise. The last juice cruise just happened a couple weeks ago. 100 of you came. It was awesome. We're looking to make it even bigger this year. I hope you can check it out. Please don't forget that nothing you hear on the Juicebox podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan or becoming bold with insulin. Today's episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by the ever since 365 the one year where CGM that's one insertion a year, that's it. And here's a little bonus for you. How about there's no limit on how many friends and family you can share your data with with the ever since now app, no limits. Ever since the episode you're listening to is sponsored by us med. Us med.com/juicebox, or call 888-721-1514, you can get your diabetes testing supplies the same way we do from us. Med, this episode is brought to you by Omnipod. Would you ever buy a car without test driving it first? That's a big risk to take on a pretty large investment, you wouldn't do that, right? So why would you do it? When it comes to choosing an insulin pump, most pumps come with a four year lock in period through the DME channel, and you don't even get to try it first. But not Omnipod five. Omnipod five is available exclusively through the pharmacy, which means it doesn't come with a typical four year DME lock in period, plus, you can get started with a free 30 day trial to be sure it's the right choice for you or your family. My daughter has been wearing an Omnipod every day for 17 years. Are you ready to give Omnipod five a try? Request your free Starter Kit today at my link, omnipod.com/juicebox Terms and Conditions apply. Eligibility may vary. Full terms and conditions can be found at omnipod.com/juicebox find my link in the show notes of this podcast player, or at Juicebox podcast.com

Tara 3:35
my name is Tara, and I am a type one diabetic. Tara. How old are you? I am 5353

Scott Benner 3:44
and you were diagnosed 54 Oh, I turned 54 on Saturday last week. Oh, happy birthday. Thank you. It doesn't feel good. I was happy to be alive, but that was about the extent of it, and I did it at friends for life. The extent of my birthday celebration was my wife took me to dinner Saturday night, but we had to fly the next morning, so it was like, we went to dinner, like, went back to the room, and, like, at eight o'clock we were like, Okay, well, good night. Super exciting. The girl that was helping us with our room, because we had a room key problem when we got there, and she brought me a balloon and a Mickey Mouse rice krispie treat. So for my 54th birthday, I got dinner early bed, a rice krispie treat and a balloon that was deflated in the morning when I woke up. What are you hoping to get? I'm not

Tara 4:33
really hoping for anything. There's really nothing that I want we but I know the feeling of spending your birthday in Disney because I've done that with my kids. Probably had like, their first 15 birthdays in Disney. Yep,

Scott Benner 4:46
really, oh, I this was just completely random that it happened to me. I'd never even been to friends for life before. I really want to go. I'm hoping next year. Oh, awesome. Yeah. I It was a fantastic experience. I don't think I've been to Disney. Since Arden was, I don't know, maybe five or six. I'm not even sure, like, but she turned 21 yesterday, so that it's been a while, is what I'm saying. But the heat, my goodness, and the humidity and, like, I don't know how you people are living in Florida like that, without a pool. If there's not a pool near you, you're in trouble, is what I learned. Yep, yeah. So you were diagnosed when? How

Speaker 1 5:23
old it was, just two years ago. No kidding, yes, any diabetes in the family? Yes. The

Tara 5:30
first one I remember is my grandmother, my mother's mother. It was never really talked about what type diabetic she was. I'm assuming she was type one. She was on insulin. And you know, back in those days, you lived with your grandparents, that we lived in the same house as my grandparents, so we saw her doing her injections. We always had to hear about she had her doctor appointment in a week, so she just stopped eating carbs completely before her doctor's

Scott Benner 5:57
appointment. That's how she got her a 1c that's how she got,

Tara 6:01
I don't even know if there was an A 1c back then, but that's how she passed her appointments. No kidding, I'll never forget his name because she talked about

Scott Benner 6:10
all the time. Dr dressed says this. Dr dressed like that. How was her health? Overall? Very poor health. Dr dressed not the end all, be all.

Tara 6:20
No, he wasn't such a great doctor. She had other health care. I mean, I'm sure they all came somehow, from diabetes. She had multiple heart attacks, multiple strokes. Ultimately, she died from a stroke where she was in a coma. And my grandfather, God bless him, he kept her on life support with private nurses for over eight months, wow, which was a really terrible thing looking back on it now, but he somehow thought that, you know, there was a chance to pop back up.

Speaker 1 6:51
Yeah. How old was she? Do you think she was 64 when she died? Wow, that's

Scott Benner 6:55
so young. Yeah. My grandmother died at 73 and I remember that feeling young, because she was and she, you know, it's funny as I this is apropos of nothing, because I'm adopted. I now realize my grandmother had type two diabetes, and just they, no one talked about it. It was just like, it was a thing, but she looked so healthy because she was so active, and then, yeah, then she had a stroke and she died. So it's interesting how, how, how things can sneak up on you. Yep. So how about the rest of the family? Is there type one in amongst, like extended family, or anything like that? Well, a

Tara 7:33
cousin, son on my father's side, who was diagnosed with type one. He was very young when he was diagnosed. There is some type two, there is rheumatoid arthritis, there is celiac there's a whole bunch of thyroid. My mother had type two, and she also was being treated

Scott Benner 7:51
for her thyroid. How about you anything else besides the type one?

Speaker 1 7:54
So far, nothing. Thank God. Yeah, I hope, I hope it stays that way. Yep,

Scott Benner 8:00
I realized that I joke around about stuff like that so much I thought I said to myself, I'm like, maybe you should start saying, I hope it stays that way, instead of like, not yet. Oh, well, I'm glad for you. That's the one thing. So you're diagnosed a couple years ago. How does it present? I mean, I'm hearing it's not a ton in your family. So it's not like you were running around thinking, I think it's coming for me. I also don't think people in their 50s think they're getting type one diabetes, usually

Tara 8:23
no. Well, I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes my second pregnancy, so I was put on medication for that. But now looking back on my first pregnancy, I definitely think that I had diabetes, gestational diabetes, type one or type two, any sort of diabetes during my first pregnancy.

Scott Benner 8:43
Okay, they knew about it in your second pregnancy, but your Hindsight is telling you you probably had it both times.

Tara 8:49
Yeah, they told me that I was borderline on that, you know, the sugar test that you do when you're pregnant. But I gained almost 80 pounds, and I was, like, always, always on the thin side. And I was almost 200 pounds when I had my daughter, who was over nine pounds, and we had a problem with, you know, during childbirth, and she wound up with shoulder dystocia and herbs palsy.

Scott Benner 9:16
No kidding, what's the what's the palsy? What is that?

Tara 9:20
Well, from what they told me, and I don't really know, because she finished all of her physical therapy and all that so long ago that while I was delivering, her shoulder was caught, and I guess there was like muscle damage or nerve damage, or it,

Scott Benner 9:34
is that a thing that's been taken care of? It? Does she suffer from it at this point? Or is it,

Tara 9:39
I could still notice it. I don't think that she notices it anymore, but I still notice, like, mostly in her hand, the way her hands move. I could see that she doesn't have full range of motion in her hand, but she doesn't know it. I guess she just deals with it at this point. Interesting. Also,

Scott Benner 9:55
you said her shoulder got caught on something, and my brain was like, caught on what? Oh, my god, yeah. I know how you ladies get through life. That's terrible. What you just said was just so scary, like her shoulder got caught on something. Oh, okay, so second baby, they give you insulin for that.

Tara 10:14
Second baby, no insulin. I went to a new OB GYN for my second pregnancy and told him the whole experience, and right away, he said, I'm just going to assume that you have gestational diabetes, and we're going to start you on medication right away. And he started me on it was oral medication. I think it might have been like gliburide,

Speaker 1 10:34
okay, yeah. So how long ago did you have those kids? Well,

Tara 10:38
the oldest one is 21 she'll be 22 next month, and the younger one will be 20 next month. Oh,

Scott Benner 10:45
nice girls, both two. Girls, yep. Girls, congratulations. That's lovely, cool. Okay, they don't have any autoimmune stuff or type one so far, no nothing. So then back to you being pretty surprised when you're diagnosed. So how did it get to you, what did you notice first that, I guess, made you feel like, Oh, I've I was going through this when I was pregnant. But what were the signs?

Tara 11:07
Well, after the second one, a couple of years after I went to the doctor, and he just, he threw in the A, 1c, and it was a little high. So he said, Oh, we're just gonna watch it anyway. Long story short, I was eventually diagnosed, they told me type two, but I was put on insulin. Okay.

Scott Benner 11:25
Oh, right away, right away. I like that. We're just gonna watch it. That's code for you're gonna get diabetes one day. We don't want to miss it. Did you know that at the time?

Tara 11:34
I kind of figured it, and I kind of, I don't know. I always knew. And I look back now and I think about when I was young, very young, like, you know, less than 10 years old, I had some health issues that I look at now, and I'm like, nobody ever thought to test me for anything like what I was really, really underweight. The whole time I was in grade school that I was on some medication. I have no idea what it was called, but I could still smell it when I think about it, just to help me gain weight as I got older, there were a few instances, especially in when I was in college, that I would just faint, like, for no reason at

Scott Benner 12:12
all. Like, do you think low blood sugar now, when you look back, I think

Tara 12:16
now that probably is what it was, but my mom took me to a doctor who was a little?

Speaker 1 12:22
I want to be nice. He was, I can't wait to hear what you're gonna say. He was a little. What he was a little?

Tara 12:29
I don't know if he really should have been a doctor, like he would sit behind his desk and smoke in

Speaker 1 12:33
his office. I thought you were gonna say stupid, but well, maybe a

Tara 12:38
little stupid to anything that you had was cured with, like, cough syrup with codeine in it. That was, like, his go to

Scott Benner 12:45
for everything. My back hurts here. Get high on this cough syrup. You'll be fine.

Tara 12:49
Yeah. So he told my mom, and I, like, the reason I was fainting was because I was having panic attacks, and I was having a lot of stress while I was in college, but I had not a care in the world. Did you

Scott Benner 13:01
speak up? Do you remember going, that's not the case. Yeah. And he

Tara 13:05
was just like, No, this is what's happening, you know? So I always kind of knew that something was not

Speaker 1 13:11
right. And then he gave you codeine. He's like, here, this will calm you down.

Scott Benner 13:18
This will help. First Doctor in history 20 years ago is like, if you tried weed, I think you're just

Tara 13:23
upset. No, no, he didn't. He didn't offer that just, just the code. No kidding,

Scott Benner 13:27
how much of that cough syrup Do you think? What do they call it? By the way, when they make drinks out of cough syrup? I can't think of it now. Oh, I don't know. I'll figure that part out. Don't worry. So that was another thing. Was there more than that? Or

Tara 13:39
no, then the gestational diabetes, and I don't know, and after I had my kids, I really just never felt right. And even with like, the being on insulin and that endocrinologist had made just like on a sliding scale and no corrections, no carb counting, nothing like that, just take the insulin three times a day, and this is, you know, test your blood sugar before. This is a sliding scale, and even now that, well, I have a pump now, but I think about it seemed like so much insulin that I can't believe I wasn't, you know, having low blood sugar all the time. But I guess I needed it because you

Scott Benner 14:15
were type one, yeah, was that like a very slow onset, or did you need the amount you needed right up front. It always stayed there. I have always disliked ordering diabetes supplies. I'm guessing you have as well. It hasn't been a problem for us for the last few years, though, because we began using us Med, you can too us med.com/juicebox, or call 888-721-1514, to get your free benefits. Check us med has served over 1 million people living with diabetes since 1996 they carry everything you need, from CGM to insulin pumps and diabetes testing supplies and more. I'm talking about all the good ones, all your favorites, libre, three. Dexcom, g7 and pumps like Omnipod five, Omnipod tandem, and most recently, the eyelet pump from beta bionics, the stuff you're looking for, they have it at us. Med, 888-721-1514, or go to usmed.com/juicebox, to get started now use my link to support the podcast that's usmed.com/juice box, or call 888-721-1514, this episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by ever since 365 and just as the name says, it lasts for a full year, imagine for a second a CGM with just one sensor placement and one warm up period every year. Imagine a sensor that has exceptional accuracy over that year and is actually the most accurate CGM in the low range that you can get. What if I told you that this sensor had no risk of falling off or being knocked off? That may seem too good to be true, but I'm not even done telling you about it, yet. The Eversense 365 has essentially no compression lows. It features incredibly gentle adhesive for its transmitter. You can take the transmitter off when you don't want to wear your CGM and put it right back on without having to waste the sensor or go through another warm up period. The app works with iOS and Android, even Apple Watch you can manage your diabetes instead of your CGM with the ever since 365 learn more and get started today at ever since cgm.com/juicebox, one year, one CGM, it always stayed there. Okay, that's interesting. When did you get an actual type one diagnosis? Well, I went into DKA

Tara 16:45
and I was in the emergency room, and they said, you know, any diabetes? I said, Yes, I'm type two. And the nurse said she gave me a really funny look, and she said, I think you should be tested for type one. And so I was tested for type one. I'm

Scott Benner 17:01
glad you met somebody who could help you. Yes, seriously. Also, the word I was looking for earlier was scissor. I mean, listen, kids, if you're listening, it's dangerous, and please don't do it. But I think it's kids may use cough syrup that have opioids in them and antihistamines, and they put it with like a soft drink sometimes, or, like, hard candy or something like

Tara 17:23
that. It's not familiar.

Scott Benner 17:26
You were getting prescription scissor. Yes, yep. Where is that guy? Now, I think he passed away. Well, yeah, the Cody stopped his heart eventually, my gosh. So once you know you have type one, can I ask? How do you process that? Like, is it shocking, or did it not? Did you were you just, like, a type two, type one, whatever. I'm using insulin anyway. Like, how does that process hit you?

Tara 17:49
No, it was shocking, very shocking. I don't know. Maybe it shouldn't have been but, yeah, I was really thrown off. I think I still am a

Speaker 1 17:57
little bit, but it is what it is. So how do you think you're thrown off? Still,

Tara 18:02
I have a little bit of anxiety now around anything, any kind of medical issues. I have anxiety about, just like leaving my house without a meter or glucose tablet, so things I didn't, never really thought about before, and now you don't have the cough syrup anymore, I don't know, so I can't use that to calm me down. Great.

Scott Benner 18:21
You finally, my God, can you imagine the guy, if he was here, he'd be like, I know it. So you have some anxiety around it. Now, why are you afraid of getting low in public, or afraid of getting low,

Tara 18:30
complete at all. I think just in general, yeah, yeah, you just don't. Has it happened? Not like a severe low, but, you know, I have my alarm set at like 80 so I can just keep an eye and see if I need to treat it a little bit earlier.

Scott Benner 18:46
And you don't want to be in a dire situation where you can't get help. Like, are you afraid that it's going to get progress to a bigger problem? You'll have a seizure, you'll die, or you just don't want to be a burden on people, or you don't want to be seen that way. Do you have any idea what part of it makes you

Tara 19:03
That's all of it, and I also just, I never want to have to be so low or so high, or in any kind of a medical situation where I would have to have other people really worrying about me, because

Scott Benner 19:15
you don't want them to worry about you, because you think they won't be able to help

Tara 19:19
you. No, I don't. I know that they could help me. I just don't want them to worry.

Scott Benner 19:23
Okay, it's funny. I worry that they can't help. That's interesting. So are you doing anything for that? Like, you know, being serious? Are you, like, seeing a therapist or, like, have you done anything to try

Tara 19:34
to impact it? No, but I probably should. But no, is

Scott Benner 19:37
it hurting your lifestyle? No,

Tara 19:40
no, it doesn't. It doesn't keep me from doing anything. It's just always on my mind,

Scott Benner 19:44
always on your mind. So do you pack a ton of stuff when you go out?

Tara 19:47
I do? I have this giant bag, the diaper bag. It's as big as a diaper bag. And it's funny, because I'm always getting compliments on it, and I find myself explaining, like, oh, I only use this bag because I have this much stuff to get.

Scott Benner 20:00
Are you? I have a small pharmacy in here. Case you're wondering, do you need to change your CGM six times, because I have seven of them in here, and even on short trips. Do I take short trips? No, like, I mean, like, grocery store and back? Is that bad coming with you? Oh, yeah, yep. Everywhere. Were you anxious prior to this? A huge thanks to my longest sponsor, Omnipod. Check out the Omnipod five now with my link, omnipod.com/juicebox you may be eligible for a free starter kit, a free Omnipod five starter kit at my link, go check it out. Omnipod.com/juicebox Terms and Conditions apply. Full terms and conditions can be found at omnipod.com/juicebox,

Tara 20:47
I would not have considered myself anxious, and I don't think anybody that knows me would consider me an anxious person either. It's really only that small piece that I worry

Speaker 1 20:57
about. Are you married? I am. Yep. Has he noticed a difference?

Tara 21:01
Yeah, he probably does. I mean, just recently, we took a long vacation, about two weeks, and I switched my pump. I used the tea slim pump, but I used Omnipod while we were on the trip, because I didn't want to worry about the tube and disconnecting when, you know, for the pool and beach and all that. And when we got back, he said, You seem so much happier with the Omnipod. Oh, how come he said that I looked like I wasn't worried that much, and I maybe like, out of sight, out of mind, and the tube wasn't around, like to remind me to be checking.

Scott Benner 21:34
Okay, well, omnipod.com/juicebox. If you guys want to try it out, and if you think she's wrong and you want to use the Medtronic, that's Medtronic diabetes.com/juicebox. Links are in the show notes. Links at Juicebox podcast.com. How are you with your management like is, do you have things where you want them to be, or are you still on them in an adjustment period?

Tara 21:55
Things are pretty good. My, my, A, one, CS right now are in the sixes. So I guess that's pretty good. When I was still considered to be type two, they were always in the eights. Well, you

Scott Benner 22:08
weren't using basal, right? Or no, no. Well, listen that. That's good news for Medtronic and for Omnipod, you're keeping in the sixes, random or No, tandem, excuse me, so many sponsors, and I hear you out there. If you're like, I know Scott, it's good for tandem or for Omnipod, because right now you're like, look, I keep a six. Doesn't matter which pump I put on. Is that about, right? Yeah, yeah. That's awesome. So you so it is about like, for you, it's about your settings and the things you do. Yes. What do you think you do that keeps your a 1c in the sixes, I still

Tara 22:41
eat pretty much whatever I would whatever I want, which is very important, because I like food and I love to eat. So I try to as much as, as much as I can, try not to think too much about what I'm having or what I'm eating. Sometimes you have to, but most of the time I don't. I really think it's just the settings.

Scott Benner 23:01
Yeah, you just have good you have good settings. You Pre-Bolus. Your meals. I do, all right, you get a high blood sugar. You wait three hours to fix it, or you fix it sooner.

Tara 23:11
Nope. 160 I start correcting. You start correcting.

Scott Benner 23:15
So basically, just, like basic concept stuff, yes, yeah, what allows you to be focused on it. Meaning, like, you know, a lot of people say, like, oh, I don't want to pre balls takes forever, or, like, that kind of stuff. Like, how have you prior been able to prioritize it?

Tara 23:30
Now it just seems like second nature when I when I first heard about, which I think was the podcast where I first heard about pre bulls thing, I just decided I'm gonna do it, and I've always done it. So have you

Scott Benner 23:42
been like that about other things in your life? Yep. Okay, so this follows your personality. Then, yeah, yep. Very much. The room is clean right now. Yes, there's no shoes on the floor.

Tara 23:54
There might be a pair of shoes on the floor. They're my husband's

Scott Benner 23:58
not yours, though. My God, no, not this guy that you're generous enough to allow to live in your house. It's making a mess of everything. I see. Any people in your life, like, friends? Have you ever? Have you met people with diabetes? You mentioned, I think it was before, in the beginning about, like, wanting to go to friends for life. So like, are you looking for that kind of, like, in person community?

Tara 24:18
I think so, because I don't really know anyone, especially with type one diabetes. I don't know anyone with type one diabetes. I think it would be nice to have someone to talk to, or someone to, you know, bounce ideas off of not that I can't with my husband and my kids, because I do, and they're very open to it. But I think it's different having someone who knows exactly what you're thinking about and why you're thinking about it?

Speaker 1 24:45
Yeah, more practical, less academic. Yeah, I see okay. What made you want to come on the podcast?

Tara 24:51
I've been listening since I was diagnosed type one for the past two years, and it was actually my daughters who were like, You should go on the podcast. Cast. So

Scott Benner 25:02
did they tell you? Why did they say there's like, a reason in their head? Do you think or

Tara 25:07
I did X and Y? I was like, I have nothing to say that anybody would be interested in the area. And they were like, Yeah, you do. You're funny. You would have, you would tell a good story.

Scott Benner 25:16
All right. Well, let's work on thinking of what that good story is going to be. Yeah, I don't know. Well, you know it's gonna happen. Much to their chagrin, it's gonna be a story about them. They're gonna be like, I didn't want you to tell that one. You mentioned your weight earlier. So first pregnancy you gained. I mean, am I right to say you went from 120 to 200 pounds? Yep. How tall? How? What's your frame? I'm about five, six, okay, but still 120 was probably like a great weight for you. I'm imagining, yeah, yeah. Does that weight come back off after the baby

Tara 25:50
all of it did not. And my my mother, I used to be so sad about it. My mother would tell me, you know, it takes takes nine months to gain it takes nine months to lose it. But that nine months came and went and

Scott Benner 26:02
like this lady's full of, I wonder what else she's been lying to me about. I mean, are you comfortable telling me, like, how much of it still existed when your second pregnancy began?

Tara 26:16
I was probably up to still about 150 when I had my second when I went into my second pregnancy. And with that pregnancy, I only gained 23 pounds.

Scott Benner 26:27
Okay, so then it comes back off after that one, or

Tara 26:31
pretty easily, came back off after the second

Scott Benner 26:34
one. Interesting, back to 120 never back to 120

Tara 26:37
but I would say like in the 130s

Scott Benner 26:39
Oh, I mean, listen, that's pretty awesome, because I'm asking, because I'm trying to figure out, like, your little intake form here, like you're using Manjaro, but it was given to you for type one. Is that correct? Yes. So how does that happen? Like, if you're, I mean, you're only two years into this, I guess you're diagnosed into the GLP phase, or, I was gonna, I meant to say craze, craze or phase. I guess either works. But does the doctor suggest it to you? Do you suggest it? How does that come up, if your weights not

Tara 27:07
my? Well, my weight at that point was a little bit of an issue, because I had gained like, in the three times that year that I went to the endocrinologist, I had consistently gained like, I guess, over the course of a year, it was maybe almost 30 pounds that I had gained. Okay, and so she told me in her office, still, she still was believing that I was type two, that I would be a perfect candidate for minjaro. And she took it out. She's like, you want to try it. I had her obviously had heard about it, but I really didn't know what it did or how it worked. And I said, Well, do you know? Do you think it'll help? And she said, Yeah, it'll help. I'll give it to you right now. And she jabbed that pen right into my belly, right there in the office.

Speaker 1 27:54
My gosh, and how long you've been on it? I've

Tara 27:57
been on it since this so I guess about two and a half years now, yeah, and I'm still on the lowest dose, 2.5

Scott Benner 28:03
really, you never because you're not there. You're not using it for weight.

Speaker 1 28:07
No, not using it for weight. Did you lose weight? I did back to

Scott Benner 28:11
bring you back to the 130 back to the 120 Oh, no kidding. How about that? And do you find that it impacts your appetite.

Tara 28:21
In the beginning, it definitely did, without a doubt, there were times where I wouldn't even think about eating, but you know, you have to. There were times I would be making dinner, you know, for my family and like forcing myself to eat. But now it is no impact on my appetite at all, but it's still

Scott Benner 28:41
impacting your blood sugar. It is, yep. So I want to know more about that, but first I want to tell you that I was at an event this weekend, myself, my wife, 10 or 12 other adults, people we hadn't seen in a while, like, you know, a mix of folks, and we're sitting down, and someone just looks at me and goes, so I feel like, I have to say, You look like a completely different person. And I was like, yeah, like, you know, I've lost like, about 70, almost 70 pounds. Now. Said, How'd you do it? And I was like, Well, I did it through GLP medications. I've been using them for about two years, and that made somebody else comfortable. Like, it's I realized, because my wife's lost weight too. Like, I realized that, like, they thought it of both of us, but were comfortable asking me, but not asking my wife, which was interesting, right? And so then that, like, opened it up to like, and Kelly, you look great. And Kelly's like, Oh, I lost this much weight. I also did glps, blah, blah, we're talking about the person who asked, just goes, I'm using it too. And I was like, Oh, cool. And then her husband goes, me too. And I was like, Okay. And then I looked around the room. I was like, anyone else? Yes, someone goes, I use it for type two diabetes. I was like, so five of the 12 people here are using a GLP medication. I was like, that's crazy, you know, and everybody in a different way. Our insurance covers it. We're lucky, right? The other two people, one woman's like, using it for, you know, an air quotes problem was how she was able to get it through her insurance. One of the guys was, like, you know, my insurance covers for type two. One guy's like, I use it for weight. It was really interesting because then I sat back, because people tell me, I talk about too much. I don't know. Like, I think it's kind of amazing, I really do. But I thought, let me just hear what everybody else thinks. And then I listened for a half an hour while three other people told me how amazing it was for them. Yeah, they said everything I was going to say. And I was like, wow, it's their exact same experience. Like, they've had the exact same experience. So I want to know about yours. Like, take me to the beginning, like, she jams you with that, with the needle right there in the office. Yep. And when does it hit you? Like, do you know, in days? This is a difference maker. Does it take the next injection? How does it

Tara 31:05
it was hours. I'm not even kidding you, it was, it was hours. My endocrinologist at that point was in I used to live in this in New York City, so she was in one of the boroughs, but then I moved up to the Hudson Valley in New York, which is where I am now. Yeah, so I was still driving, like that hour and a half drive to go to the endocrinologist, because I hadn't really found anyone up here, and it would I was with her for a while, and I knew her, I trusted her, by the time I got home from that appointment. So I drove an hour and a half home. I was going to make myself some lunch, and I made a little like a piece of toast with some jelly on it, because I knew that I didn't have an appetite that quickly, that quickly, and I couldn't even eat it. I could not eat it.

Scott Benner 31:56
Have you heard me say that I lost like, over nine pounds in the first four days? Yeah,

Tara 31:59
I think that first couple of months was like, that's when I lost all the weight. I'm not really losing weight anymore from it,

Scott Benner 32:05
and you don't have weight to lose this point. No, no, right? What do you think it's doing to your insulin needs? I

Tara 32:13
can tell you from when I first started using basal insulin I was using, it was 38 units, 38 units every night for basal insulin, 38 units every night. Okay, now I am using, I guess my average insulin use on my pump now is like 22 units a day.

Scott Benner 32:37
Hmm, that's total, yep. Jeez, that's so you were using 38 basal, how much Bolus or meal insulin? Do you think you were using

Tara 32:45
Bolus? Well, they had me on a sliding scale, so it was a minimum of eight units,

Scott Benner 32:52
46 units a day, down to 22 and did you find that to be commiserate to your weight? Because there's going to be people who just say, like, well, sure, like, weighs less now she needs less insulin.

Tara 33:03
It started almost right away, before I before I really lost the majority of the weight. So I don't know. I mean, some of it probably has to do with weight, but,

Speaker 1 33:12
yeah, my

Scott Benner 33:13
goodness, isn't that something? Okay, so some of it's got to do with weight. I think just getting rid of the fat, you know, helps you with, like, hormonal stuff, which is probably weight issues too. And of course, you're eating less, so you're using less insulin. I think it's a mix of all that for most people. But

Tara 33:32
yeah, you all. I think now my appetite is back to normal. It has been for probably a year now, so I'm not really eating any less at

Scott Benner 33:41
this point. Gotcha. Gotcha. So if you're not eating any less and you're not gaining weight, then it is helping you in a couple of ways. Then, right? Because you're not, you're not holding the weight, and your insulin needs are almost in half, so it's helping you with insulin resistance, for sure. Yes, yeah, you feel that way. I'm not putting words in your mouth,

Tara 34:01
right? No, I definitely feel that way.

Scott Benner 34:02
That's interesting, isn't it? It really is. It's going to grow in popularity amongst doctors, which is going to get into people's hands. I think that. I think Lily and Novo are going to make, they say they're making a daily pill that's going to work as well as the injection. That'd be crazy if they accomplish that. This whole thing of replacing GLP is, oh, it's insane.

Tara 34:24
I tell everyone how amazing it is. And I actually was just with, I won't mention his name, but I was with one of my brothers. I have a big family, and he was telling me about some health issues that he had, and I said, please ask your doctor. I think you'd be a good candidate for Manjaro or ozempic, please ask your doctor. What was his reply? He said, I would love to do that, but I am afraid that I'm gonna have minjaro face. Yeah. I said, Would you rather lose the weight and have a healthier heart? Heart

Scott Benner 35:01
Yeah. Would you like to have grandmom strokes and heart attacks?

Tara 35:05
Yeah? Well, that's it too. Our mother passed away from a stroke too when she was 62 years old. Oh, hell. So yeah, I think. And there's six of us. I have three sisters and two brothers, and I think we all think about that all the time.

Scott Benner 35:17
Yeah, I bet you. So you're sitting there, he's talking, and you're thinking so alive and skinny face that looks a little like you lost weight or dead? Yes, yeah, I'm gonna go with alive, is what you're thinking. That's where I'm at, by the way, I actually, I have to tell you, I feel pretty lucky. I don't know how I got away with my double chin shrinking the way it did. I mean, it's the closest I've come to believing in God in quite some time. So, like, I'm very grateful that that happened. But the rest of it, I was already, like, built, like, classically, like a guy, like, my legs were already thinner, like the guy don't have a butt, you know what I mean? Like, I didn't have a lot of fat on. My arms were already lean. Or, you know, my chest, the top of my back, like love handles, like, you know, all around the midsection, like, you know, where it happens. And as soon as I started losing weight, I ran out and bought Spanx, like, shirts, the like, like, you know, just because I kept thinking, like, I'm gonna start like, the fats gonna come out, the skin's gonna be extra gravity is gonna grab it, and it's gonna get stretchy. And if I hold it up, maybe I'll get some collagen, like, a little elasticity, like, right? And it really is working. My wife always used to tell me, like, when she was young, she's like, I wear really tight bras because I don't want my boobs to drop as much. And I was like, Is that a thing you heard? And she goes, yeah. And I was like, All right, like, I don't know if that's true or not, but I was like, that's what popped into my head. I'm like, let me just wear, like, a tight shirt every day, like, whether I was going somewhere, I didn't care if somebody was going to see me. Like, I just wore the just wore this thing every day. And I think it really saved me a little bit. So have you seen me? Would you know me before and after

Tara 36:50
visually? No, I think I've just seen you recently.

Scott Benner 36:53
Just know what I look like now. Yeah, if I showed you what I look like like two years ago, you'd be like, Oh, that's insane. And again, I tell people all the time like I did not count myself as a person who ate like, incredibly poorly. And actually, as I look at my day now, I don't think I eat any differently now than I did two years ago. I do eat less most of the time. And you can get full credit to the GLP like, because if you're using Manjaro, I'm I'm using Z bound. It's the same drug I do not like think about being hungry like ever. When I started, one of the craziest things I had to tell people is like, there's an alarm on my phone to remind me to have breakfast. Yeah, yeah. So I don't have to do that anymore, and I actually did wake up hungry this morning.

Tara 37:37
So yeah. And it's weird, because when that feeling of hunger starts to come back, I like, I didn't know what it was. I didn't recognize it. When I first started feeling

Scott Benner 37:48
I know exactly what you're saying. The first time I had

Tara 37:52
it, I was like, Oh, wow, that's what it is. I'm hungry. I need to eat. Yes,

Scott Benner 37:56
you're almost like, worried about yourself for like that happened to me this morning. I swear to you, I opened my eyes and I was like, what's that pain in my stomach? And then I was like, Oh, I'm hungry. And then my first thought was like, Oh, I hope I'm okay. Like, why would I not be okay? You know, I don't know another way to explain it to people, other than it's just awesome. I know it hasn't worked for everybody. I will tell you the biggest thing to look out for, if you have type one, is I think people with insulin resistance are going to see a lot of value from it, and if you have type one, but if you're not a person with insulin resistance, you might take it and not notice anything. Like, I definitely think it's helping people with weight, with hunger, satiety, etc, but if you have insulin resistance, so I mean, like, on top of like, forget your type one. Like, would you have insulin resistance if you weren't type one? Like, I think that's where it helps people a lot. Yeah. But going back to your brother that you were talking to him, I was in a very similar situation again over the weekend. Like, somebody piped up, I don't want to do that cheating, they said. And I was like, Okay, I looked over and I thought, you really are in a situation here with your health, you know, like this, this person, and there's a mixed group of people. There were, like, classically lean people their whole lives there. There was, you know, smokers, there non smokers. People drank. People didn't drink. There was a regular mix of people. This person that spoke up has a fair amount of weight to lose, and his parent had a heart attack in their 50s, and the response was like, it's cheating. And I was like, Well, I mean, I don't know how much time you think we have here on the planet, but like, you're in your 50s, you know what I mean? Like, Ozzy died yesterday at 76 and he was pickled, and he could only make it to 76 76 we maybe have, like, 25 more years here. You know I'm saying, like, let's just, let's just say it is cheating for a second. Let's, I'll give you that. Let me give you your point. Okay, call it cheating. Cheating to stay alive. That doesn't hurt anyone else. Like. I don't have to drink a baby's blood or murder somebody or something, like in a ritual like, I just inject the thing, and the weight comes off, and my fatty liver goes I don't have fatty liver, but your fatty liver goes away. Your heart issues, you know, get better. If you have insulin resistance, it goes away. You're leaning towards type two diabetes. Goes away. Goes away. Go like, what I'm looking for somebody to explain to me why someone would say that you have any

Speaker 1 40:26
idea? I have no idea at all. Yeah, I really can't wrap my head around it.

Scott Benner 40:32
So it's cheating.

Tara 40:34
I mean, I just feel like I've had a good experience, and I, I'm not shy about it. I tell everyone, and I I I tell them that I have had a good experience. Some people are afraid of, not only majority the side effects, but I, I think once, in the very beginning, I had side effects from it, and that was it. I haven't had anything in the whole you know, mostly for the two years. You're

Scott Benner 40:57
not really on a very big dose either, like 2.5 that's the starter dose. What were your side effects when you had

Tara 41:03
them? I had a little bit of vomiting in the beginning. Okay, were you eating too much? Probably not, because I it affected my appetite right away. So probably, maybe I was just eating the wrong things.

Scott Benner 41:15
I met a person. This person was awesome to share this with me. As a type one lost a lot of weight. I see them, like, yearly. I guess last time I saw this person, I was like, Oh, my God, you look awesome. Like, amazing, yeah. GLP is really working. My insulin needs are lower. Look at all the weight I lost. Great. I was like, that's fantastic. I was like, how are you tolerating and he goes, I throw up every day.

Speaker 1 41:40
And I was like, every day,

Scott Benner 41:43
and he laughs, and he goes, Yeah, I'm eating way too much food. And I was like, oh my god, it hasn't stopped your hunger. He goes, not at all. It's like, that's interesting. So it's value. Was there for everything else, right? But it didn't touch their hunger. And I was like, Really, are you sure? Like, I actually said, Is it maybe time to see a therapist? Maybe you're covering for something else here with this, you know, you use the words, I use them on the podcast all the time that I eat through it, and I was like, why? And he goes, I don't love food. I was like, okay, so I'd stop. If I was you, I would tell you that I'm not good with, like, oily foods. Like, I cut a lot of oil out of my life number of years before glps. I'm not good with oil to begin with. But, like, I can't deep fried stuff. It's gonna send me to the restroom, you know, that kind of thing, but that's awesome for you. Your doctor is still this is, I'm trying to think of what people's questions are going to be like, you don't have weight to lose, you have type one diabetes. It's not indicated for that. How are you getting this is going to

Speaker 1 42:47
be their question. That's a good question.

Tara 42:50
I don't my insurance does cover it. That's it. They just cover it. Awesome. I don't know what kind of diagnosis. I mean, it's the same pharmacy is giving me all of my insulin, the pumps, the everything, all of the supplies, Dexcom and so I'm sure they're aware of everything that I'm getting and what my diagnosis

Scott Benner 43:13
is. What kind of industry does your healthcare come from?

Tara 43:16
My husband is, I don't know if I could say, No, I don't

Scott Benner 43:19
want you to tell me what he does. Like, is there an industry that you could say, without saying you, I mean, not real city of New York. Oh, he works for the state. Yeah,

Tara 43:30
he's retired from the city of New York.

Scott Benner 43:32
Oh, you got that good stuff?

Tara 43:34
Yes, it's excellent. It's awesome. Good

Scott Benner 43:37
for you. Yeah, I'm gonna knock on all my wood in front of you, for you, because that's really perfect. In your notes, it says, just healthcare, like, what do you want to talk about?

Tara 43:46
About healthcare? I did work in healthcare. This is actually a little bit about my type one diagnosis story, either, and how it threw me off a little bit mentally. I was working in a doctor's office. I was the in front office, and I really enjoyed my job, very small office, one doctor and us three ladies who worked in there. When I was diagnosed, I took some time off, which the doctor especially was fine with, even though now I look back and I see he I had told him right before that was the first time I ever had an A 1c in the sixes, it was actually 6.0 I don't know how it happened or how I did it, but I had told him. He was like, I guess kind of like my primary care. But I said, Oh, wow, Doc, I just got my a 1c results back, and it was a 6.0 and he said, Oh no, it shouldn't be a 6.0 you should keep it at least mid sevens. Oh, yeah. And I just thought, well, I thought I was doing great, you know, but whatever that's that's just something that I think about now that annoys me.

Scott Benner 44:55
Did he give you a reason why you would say that for lows?

Tara 45:00
He said 6.0 would mean that I'm having too many lows. And I was like, No, I'm not. I'm not having lows. I mean, I wasn't wearing Dexcom at the time either, so I don't really know if

Scott Benner 45:09
I was, but you didn't think you were. And when you said that to him, his response was,

Tara 45:12
he said, talk to your endocrinologist about that. So, oh,

Scott Benner 45:16
so you knew enough not to listen. Is that right? You were like, I'm not doing even at that

Tara 45:21
point, before I started listening to the podcast or reading the books or anything, I knew not to listen you

Scott Benner 45:26
still knew you were just like, I'm not going to choose poorer health, right? Did he put it in your head, the fear of the lows? Do you think? Or did you have it prior to that?

Tara 45:36
I did not have it prior to, I guess, the type one diagnosis when I finally got a Dexcom and put it on and realized what was happening.

Scott Benner 45:46
Yeah. Okay, so talk about that. How long into type one did you get a CGM?

Tara 45:50
It was only a couple of days, okay? And what did it teach you? It taught me, well, first of all about the lows, because I never really even knew that I was having them. I mean, sometimes I knew, like, I would feel a little dizzy and but I didn't know why. I didn't know that it was low blood sugar, and I never treated it, and thank God, never had any consequences from it. But when I started seeing it and knowing what was happening, it scared me a little bit.

Scott Benner 46:16
Yeah, yeah. No kidding, yeah. That is definitely stuck with you. Have you had a bad low? Like, have you had a low, like, where you were unable to help yourself?

Tara 46:24
No, no, no. And now my time and range is excellent. I have like, a 98% time and range with only, like, a 1%

Speaker 1 46:33
low. How did you accomplish that? I don't know.

Tara 46:37
I'm really good about pre bolusing. Usually it's like breakfast and lunch. I try to eat the same meal, so at least most of the day i i know how my blood sugar is going to react. It's always the dinner that will mess me up.

Scott Benner 46:53
Dinner message, because it why? Because you think you sit down afterwards, you're sedentary. It's a different kind

Tara 46:59
of food. It's usually my biggest meal of the day. And there is like, like, I'm Italian. We like to have pasta. I love pizza, like, just, you know, those kind of carb heavy meals I usually tend to have at dinner time.

Speaker 1 47:13
Okay, okay, all right. And you're learning to Bolus for that still, or you think you

Tara 47:19
I am still learning to Bolus for that gotcha, but I'm getting much better.

Scott Benner 47:23
What do you see happen that you're that you're trying to get on top of still, I still have that rise.

Tara 47:26
And, you know, it's so delayed, so sometimes I don't even know when it's gonna, you know, I'll think I handled it, and then six hours later it'll start again. So it's just kind of having to figure, Figure out

Scott Benner 47:40
I hear the Yeah, the timing of that next wave, yes, impact, right there. Gotcha, I'm sorry. You back on the tandem now I am, and it allows, did you do the upgrade to this software so you can do the extended boluses while staying in automation? I

Tara 47:56
did, and I don't know what kind of magic it's working, but

Scott Benner 47:59
it's you have a better success now with that, Oh, yeah.

Tara 48:04
And I don't even really know what it does, but

Scott Benner 48:07
well, so you're not using the extended boluses right now.

Tara 48:10
I'm using the extended Bolus, and I also figured out that I could use the temp basal at the same time I'm using the extended Bolus. Oh, so that has kind of helped a little bit with more of those, like, you know, longer rises,

Scott Benner 48:24
you found a way, with the with the tandem pump, to use the algorithm, the extended Bolus feature that they've added. And the way I talk about insulin on the podcast, you kind of like, smush the three things together, and you're doing it. Look at you, but you're in your 50s, right? Like you get diagnosed. What makes you think podcast? Or did it not? I don't know.

Tara 48:44
I just started doing some research on the internet, and I saw the podcast mentioned in a few places, yeah. So I found the Facebook page first, and then I started listening to the podcast. Okay? And

Scott Benner 48:57
then you just found something valuable, and then you started applying it and just kind of move from there. That's awesome. That's very cool. I mean, we're from the same area, so I don't seem objectionable to you. I guess.

Speaker 1 49:12
No, that's nice. How long did you live in the city?

Tara 49:15
I lived in the city. Well, I've been up here for 10 years now, so the majority of my life, 40

Speaker 1 49:22
years. Do you miss it? I do miss it. What about it?

Tara 49:26
Let me start by saying it's definitely not the same now, and I was just over the weekend back in Brooklyn. It's not the same, and it's not somewhere I would probably want to live. Now, of the six of us, my siblings, my one brother, is the only one still left in Brooklyn. Okay, we all kind of moved out. All of my friends moved out from it's, sadly, just not the place that it was when we were growing up. But I think that's probably everywhere, everywhere, yeah,

Scott Benner 49:56
yeah, yeah. I know when we moved I should probably not say this. Out loud, I know when we moved from home, and then, you know, we were, got rooted in our new place, and had been there for a couple of years. We went home one time, and we were driving down the street, and I just said to my wife, I was like, hey, was this place when we lived here? Or no? And she goes, I don't know. I've been wondering the same thing. I can't tell if our perspective has changed or if the place has changed, and we never really did figure it out, honestly, like, if it's just, you know what? I mean, like, it's hard to decide if it's you or if it's the place, or if it's maybe a little bit of both, or I never know. I mean,

Tara 50:39
we, we probably would have stayed. But my two of my sisters, my twin sister and another sister, had moved up here, and we were all very close. And I think my husband knew that he needed to be near your sister, that I wanted to be near

Scott Benner 50:53
them, yeah, yeah. Oh, it's nice. It's a nice area. Yeah, very nice. They have a little property. Or do like something you can sit out back of?

Tara 51:02
Yes, we do. We have a we have, I don't really even know how big it is. It's a good size. Yeah. And I have a little creek in my yard, and which my husband likes to tell me, you know, I always said I wanted to live on the water, so he gave that to me. My

Scott Benner 51:18
wife said, can we be near a beach? And I was like, I don't know. You keep telling me you want to be near an airport, in case you have to get the have to get to the kids. And I was like, You got to pick one. So, my gosh, do you see your children often? Yeah,

Tara 51:28
well, my oldest daughter just graduated from college in May. Oh, nice. So she's back home now. Yeah, you know, doing the job search. And so I feel bad it's so hard for kids now, and my youngest is in college, but she's going to community college. She commutes from home, so they're both home now.

Scott Benner 51:46
Are they having that experience where the thing that they're studying someone has said out loud, AI, is going to replace while they're studying

Tara 51:53
for it? I mean, I think so. Yeah, what a feeling. My youngest one is going for psychology. She ultimately wants to be like a therapist, like adolescent therapist. So I think there's always going to be a need for that. Yeah, the oldest one, we're not really sure was she studied English literature. She did great in school. The grades were outstanding. She was just published in a literary magazine, and she's having a hard time finding, you know, a niche or a place where she should be,

Scott Benner 52:24
yeah? I think it's going to be like that for a lot of people. Yeah. Really sucks. Yeah. And I know some of you are listening going, Well, Scott, stop using AI for things. But I mean, I'm by myself, like, it's the only way I get stuff done sometimes is to let it help me with things. Okay, well, that'll be fun. I'll enjoy an entire generation of kids, you know, not just saying I can't pay back my student loans, but I can't pay back my student loans, and the thing I know how to do doesn't exist anymore. Yeah,

Tara 52:53
well, we keep telling them, You stay home for as long as you know we don't. We love having them home, so we're like, you stay home as long as you can, as long as you want to, you know you're always welcome here. Hopefully they find something that they want to eventually leave and do. And

Scott Benner 53:09
yeah, when you say that, because we say that too to our kids, like, you don't have to rush out, but like, there's the party that knows that they're not really going to get going till they're on their own. Yeah? And there's the part of you that's like, Well, yeah, but if they stay here forever, I'll be happy. And then you have to find the balance between, like, I don't want them to leave, but they should leave. And then then the financial aspect of it, which is that can't really afford to leave. And, you know, that's another problem. Like, we're lucky enough to be able to, like, we have enough space for our kids to stay, you know, where they have their own broom? Yeah. And my son's trying so hard to, like, save money. I but I don't even know if he knows what he's saving it for, right? That's the interesting thing, too. You know what I mean? If you want to buy a house one day, and he's like, I don't

Tara 53:55
know. And they see now like that. They see now how much the bills really are like, when you're looking to Yeah, she sees her friends are getting entry level jobs, and, you know, they're making, like, about 60,000 and she's like, but how do you afford to pay for your rent and a car if you're driving to work or internet? And I'm like, yeah, that's, you know, you got to figure all that stuff out.

Scott Benner 54:19
Listen, mommy, found a sucker. Okay, and you call that sucker daddy, but I call him sucker, and he splits his money with me. I don't know why I'm meaning, like, how do you do it without, like, two incomes? Like, first of all, and how crazy is it that $60,000 leaves a person going, would I still be able to get internet? Yeah,

Tara 54:38
I know. Well, I mean the rent. I can't even believe how much rent when, when I got out of college, my rent on a two bedroom apartment was $800 a month. And I can't even believe how much these kids have to come out of pocket for. Now,

Scott Benner 54:52
it's crazy how they're gonna live in the city, that's for sure. But yeah, I swear to you, Mike,

Tara 54:56
even up here, even even where we live, the rents are about the same. It. Not too much

Scott Benner 55:01
cheaper, right? So you get that feeling like, so that's where I was with my son. I was like, Maybe you should just stay for years and save up enough money so you can put a down payment on something so that you don't because it's gonna be the same money monthly. It's the down payments. The difference usually could be so actually, you're not buying a not buying a mansion or anything like that. So I'm like, at least you'd own it, you know? And he's like, I don't know, do I want to own it? I'm like, Oh, my God, there's so many questions. I'm like, if you just do what I did and knock mom up, then you have to get a place. There's no way around it. Like, right? Like, now you have, like, you have roots all of a sudden, and now with the jobs are also remote. Like, that's even the other thing. Like, my son's like, well, I don't know. Do I want to tie myself down to a place? Because I could do this from anywhere? Yeah, yep. God, that's a good question. I don't know. I really don't know what to do. I don't even know how to explain it like I understood in the world I lived in. And if things would have changed even 30% from how I grew up, I would I would be valuable still, but yeah, so different. Now,

Tara 56:03
I had before my daughter, right before she graduated, I had said to my husband, you know, she if she decides to move out, you know, we better put a little money aside to help her, because she's going to need some help getting started. And he says he was mostly joking, probably 80% joking. He was like, you know, Tara, when does the when does the help stop? When do I slow down on the help?

Scott Benner 56:31
When can I take off on a Friday? I was wondering, yeah, how come I'm like, eating on a Saturday morning, trying to get my wits about me, and wondering when I'm going to cut that lawn and this, and think that, and go to I feel my wife says the same thing. Like, I There are days when I think like, we're doing our best to put money away for the future, but I'm like, Am I just gonna work until I die, and then just, there's gonna be whatever money's there gets split between my kids because I'd like to do something once. Yep, I grew up. Really broke down. I didn't do, like, we're going on vacation this weekend, and I am just focused on not feeling bad about that. Like, that's my whole week. Is, like, try not to feel bad that you're spending money to go on vacation. Yeah,

Tara 57:13
you can't feel bad about it. Yeah, you can't. My husband, I don't know if the situation was similar, but he grew up, really, with not very much, and I had a very nice, I wouldn't say we were rich, but we were very comfortable, especially for a family that had six kids. We did take vacations. We had nice things. My parents drove nice cars, and my husband did not have that. And now he retired from his first job, and he is working full time on a second job, and he wants to spend what we have. And then he says, I want to stay in the nice hotel. I want to go here. I you know, this is what I want to do,

Scott Benner 57:55
yeah, this is the money my whole life. Yeah? Well, tell him, I don't. I don't know how much money I have, but I have the same feeling like, you know, I swear to you, I think I said this out loud already, but I bought a pack of underwear the other day, and I felt like I splurged, because I got to the point where I lost I'm, by the way, I'm so proud of this, I had to buy medium underwear, or just, I just want to say how proud I am of that. I was like, okay, my underwear is baggy. It's not supposed to be. It's getting older, but it could last longer, but I'm gonna buy a pack four pairs of medium underwear. And I mean, as I pushed the button, I was like, Oh, I don't know. I don't really need these. Like, that's ridiculous, you know, like, I'm in my 50s, and I'm like, should I really be splurging like this? And that made me feel ridiculous. It also made me feel extra ridiculous when it showed up and I was excited.

Tara 58:51
I'm just laughing because it's almost the same thing. My husband saw that the underwear that he uses was on sale on Prime Day, and he told me to order

Scott Benner 59:01
them. I'm like, Hey, finally I can spend some money and not feel terrible about this. But I still felt that, like, as I ordered, I was like, I mean, it was like, I don't know. It was like, $24 and I thought, like, I really don't need this. That was me splurging. I was like, I'm doing it anyway. I'm gonna get underwear that fits. And then you think it was over, but then the package shows up. Somebody goes, What's this? And I was like, Oh, it's my underwear. People looked at me like, what's wrong with you? I was like, well, you obviously never made $4.50 an hour, but I have all right. Tara, what have we not talked about that we should have? Is there anything we missed about diabetes, your use of glps? Anything at all that you want to make? Make? No, no, I don't think so. Okay, your husband wearing boxers or briefs or boxer briefs? Do you want to say?

Tara 59:43
I guess they're boxer briefs. I guess that's what you would consider them.

Scott Benner 59:47
They're like shorts, but they're tight. Yes, that's what I used to tell them. I said, Hey, that's a weird club. Let's start a Facebook group for men who wear boxer briefs. See how many people. Get in there, I'm gonna guess none. And my last diabetes question for you is, you worry for your daughters at all. Do you mention it to them? Like, how do you deal with the idea that maybe they could end up with diabetes one day?

Tara 1:00:12
I'm trying not to cry because yes, I do. I do worry about it for them all the time. And they know they see me. They hear the podcast in the background, they know that there are genetics to it. I've tried to subtly mention, you know, the antibody testing, but

Speaker 1 1:00:31
they're young,

Tara 1:00:31
older and, yeah, I mean, they're over 18, so it's not like I'm going to be forcing them to do anything. And I don't think they would anyway. I think they're they'd rather not know until they have to know so well

Scott Benner 1:00:45
tell people about the worst part about parenting is when your kids are old enough to tell you no, but not old enough to pay for anything.

Speaker 1 1:00:52
Yeah, that is the worst,

Scott Benner 1:00:56
because you stop yourself from going like do you enjoy living here?

Tara 1:01:02
I can turn off that. Wi Fi,

Scott Benner 1:01:04
you love the free nature of your life. Could you just do this one thing without making a face at me? And then you realize, like, it's already a little unnatural that they still live at home, I think, and you want to let them continue to like separate because it's, it's good for them, but yeah, still, there's moments where you're like, ah, like, I broke my ass for this today, and, like, and now you're giving me, like, I loved it when you were nine. You just were like, Yeah, cool. I'll do that. Yeah, it's not a good thing. Like, it's interesting how parenting is shifting because of, mean, job market and economy and and everything else. It's a it's a new I was thinking about the other day, like it's a new generation of like, how people handle this time?

Tara 1:01:45
Yeah, I think I don't know. There's no. Well, I have this conversation with my sisters all the time because our kids are pretty much roughly around the same age. When do you stop paying their cell phone bill?

Scott Benner 1:01:58
Yeah? Well, I would guess now is the answer, yeah, I

Tara 1:02:01
know. I'm like, I don't know. I feel bad telling them like, you know, oh, by the way, next month, you're going to be hearing from Verizon, you know. But I feel like, at some point, I mean, when, when I was that age, I was pretty much paying all of my

Scott Benner 1:02:15
please, my we were just talking about the other day, like my wife was 22 when we got married. She was 25 when she was pregnant, the first time she was 30, the second time she was pregnant. Like we live in an apartment by ourselves when we were, I don't know, 21 something like that. It was expensive as almost $1,000 a month back then, like it was still it was a lot of money. You know, we were both working and, you know, we were grocery shopping and cleaning and learning how to be married, and we weren't good at that, like, you know, I mean, like, it's not like we had, like, great role models on that one. So we were, like, doing all that ourselves. Yeah, I mean, my son, we've transferred some of his larger bills to him, like, he handles his car, which is nice, but, I mean, he's still on my insurance, so he's probably paying less because of that, you know, like, food, like nobody asks for anybody to kick for food, you know. But that'd be sweet. Yeah, food's expensive, you know, electricity, like all the other stuff. Listen, I'm hoping that he's able to save up enough money that when he leaves, I won't feel guilty about it. I'll be like, Look, I did you solid. You got all this money that you were able to, like, save, like, you know, go forth and conquer. I'm not the one holding you back, for sure, at this point. I don't know such a weird thing, but I but the hardest part is that I resonate so much with the like, I don't really want them to go,

Tara 1:03:37
yeah, not tomorrow. But, you know that could change, because it's only been a few months since she's,

Scott Benner 1:03:46
like, maybe me and these girls are gonna have enough of each other, and that might be that, yeah, yeah, I do this. I have this. Tell me if this happens to you, and I'll let you go, like, sometimes, like, I see, like, my son's older than Arden, obviously, Arden still in college. Like, that's still kind of happening, but Cole's not and, like, sometimes he'll come over and be like, Hey, can you crack my back, like, something like that. And he likes to have his back crack like, so you're face to face, like, you reach behind him and kind of pull, pull his back up. And, like, afterwards, like, sometimes I'll hug him, and we'll stand there for a minute, you know, and then you stop, and I think I should have hugged him longer. He's gonna move out. Yeah, that feeling, I hate, that feeling, whatever that is, somebody put a name to that. I don't like that. Because the other thing is, if you hold on to him too long, he looks shit and he goes, What Are we dancing like it's over. Now, you know, but I don't know. I hate that

Tara 1:04:37
part anyway. Well, we recently, just like two weeks ago, my older daughter and I were just sitting around talking, and we had both for some reason, Boston came up, and we were both like, we should go to Boston. I haven't been in a long time. She's never been and my husband happened to walk in the door coming home from work, and. He's like, Hey, what's going on? We're like, Oh, we're just talking about how we want to go to Boston. And he was like, let's do it, you know, book a hotel, let we'll go next week. And after she left and went upstairs, I was like, Are you sure you want to do this? And he said, We don't know. How many more times are we going to have to do things like this where, yeah, where they're both not working yet. And he's like, everything's gonna change once they're out of the house and they're working full time, and it's not gonna be the same. So, like, it made

Scott Benner 1:05:30
sense, that's where we're at. I mean, like, I said we're going away this weekend. Like, I've traveled a lot for I mean, it's in technically, for business. I went on the cruise. I went to friends for life. Like, I have a talk at touch by type one coming up in September. I have a private speaking engagement I have in October, like, like, a lot of like, flying around and everything. And it would be so easy to tell you, like, I I would love to just stay home next week, but same exact thing, it's like, I don't know how many more times, like, we're all going to be available to do something like this together. So like, let's just go find a place where we can just chill out again, nothing exciting, even just like, a place to go relax and not be in a rush and spend time with each other. So, you

Tara 1:06:15
know, we take like, one long vacation every year. This just happened. It was like three nights we spent in Boston, and since we've come back. So it's been almost two weeks. All four of us, like that was the best trip we had the best time on. On that trip should have just done yeah, I'm glad we did it.

Scott Benner 1:06:31
Yeah, that's great. That's it. Well, that's what we're shooting for this week. So hopefully that all goes well. Yes, all right. Well, having said that, there's a long list of things in the refrigerator that my wife said I have to do before we leave. So I'm gonna say goodbye, and I'm gonna work on the podcast some more, and then I'm gonna get on my list. I don't know what to call this episode, but boxer brief seems appropriate. I was gonna say my husband, yeah, when your husband, your husband said, like, no, let's go to Boston. I was like, so soon after buying the boxer briefs. That's crazy. Oh, don't we need to recoup those funds first.

Tara 1:07:05
Actually, I think the boxer briefs were delivered while we were in

Scott Benner 1:07:09
Boston. That's hilarious. My God, all right, hold on. One second for me. Tara, thank you so much for doing this. I really appreciate

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#1610 The Ex

You can always listen to the Juicebox Podcast here but the cool kids use: Apple Podcasts/iOS - Spotify - Amazon Music - Google Play/Android - iHeart Radio -  Radio Public, Amazon Alexa or wherever they get audio.

"Mike" shares his family’s journey after his daughter’s type 1 diagnosis at 10. She just marked her 4th diaversary.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Welcome back, friends. You are listening to the Juicebox podcast.

"Mike" 0:14
I am a dad from the Northeast with a daughter that just celebrated her fourth anniversary this past weekend.

Scott Benner 0:22
If this is your first time listening to the Juicebox podcast and you'd like to hear more, download Apple podcasts or Spotify, really, any audio app at all, look for the Juicebox podcast and follow or subscribe. We put out new content every day that you'll enjoy. Want to learn more about your diabetes management. Go to juiceboxpodcast.com up in the menu and look for bold Beginnings The Diabetes Pro Tip series and much more. This podcast is full of collections and series of information that will help you to live better with insulin. Nothing you hear on the Juicebox podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan. This episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by Medtronic diabetes and their mini med 780 G system designed to help ease the burden of diabetes management, imagine fewer worries about missed boluses or miscalculated carbs thanks to meal detection technology and automatic correction doses. Learn more and get started today at Medtronic diabetes.com/juicebox this episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by the contour next gen blood glucose meter. Learn more and get started today at contour next.com/juicebox text.com/juicebox, this episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by the twist a ID system powered by tide pool that features the twist loop algorithm, which you can target to a glucose level as low as 87 Learn more at twist.com/juicebox. That's twist with two eyes.com/juicebox. Get precision insulin delivery with a target range that you choose at twist.com/juicebox. That's t, w, i, i s t.com/juicebox. Okay, just give me like a little testing.

"Mike" 2:20
I am a dad from the Northeast with a daughter that just celebrated her fourth anniversary this past weekend.

Scott Benner 2:26
Awesome, actually, that testing was so good that I'll just keep talking, and we'll keep all this together in the episode. All right, so today's guest is going to remain anonymous, because we're going to talk about a few sensitive subjects. Now here's the thing. I could talk to you without a name if you want, or we could pick a name. Do you have a favorite name that you always wished your parents called you or something like that?

"Mike" 2:47
By the general, everyone wants to be a mike, right? You just want to be Mike.

Scott Benner 2:52
Mike sounds pretty good. All right. Well, then if we're having a conversation and I'm drawn to say a name, I will say Mike. So Mike, tell me how old your is your daughter, right? How old was your daughter when she was diagnosed?

"Mike" 3:05
So she was 10 years old, almost 11, and we just celebrated her fourth diversity this past weekend, actually.

Scott Benner 3:14
Well, so it's been 2021, in June, exactly. Okay, yep. And a lot about what we're gonna talk about is you're divorced from from your daughter's mother. So are you together then when the diagnosis happens, or are you already separated?

"Mike" 3:31
No, we were already divorced at that point, and she had been remarried, and I was on the verge of getting remarried myself about a month before, month after we got married, a month after the diagnosis came. So there's a lot going

Scott Benner 3:44
on. Yeah. Oh, so your fourth anniversary is coming up next month that too. Yeah,

"Mike" 3:50
it's all tied together diabetes and and marriage and stuff like that. So it's kind of it's a bittersweet time of year for us, for sure. You know, we look back on the diversity and think back, I still think back to those early days and how tough it was, and confusing and just so much going on, and then a month later, just so much to celebrate for my daughter, and obviously getting remarried, and, you know, her having a step mom and stuff like that. So it's, it's quite a unique month for us, for

Scott Benner 4:15
sure, little conflicting, right? Yeah, yeah. So tell me about the diagnosis. How did you notice what was happening? Was she with you or your ex at that point? So

"Mike" 4:25
it was one of these things where, like a lot of parents, you know, you blame yourself. You wonder, how did, how could I have missed this? And basically, it kind of caught on by storm. She was having used the bathroom a lot. It was drinking a lot of water. It was the end of the school year. It was really hot in the classroom. So the teacher said, you know, how come you filled your water bottle two or three times now? Oh, I'm just really thirsty. And then, you know, we're there's this stuff going on towards the end of a school year and summer beginning excited, and next thing you know, she's going to the bathroom a lot. And it was just concerning. And I think the tough thing was. Was, we were out to eat that weekend, and she never really asked for sweets and and, you know, Shirley Temples times 10, and she was just, we were at a restaurant, and it's like, why you keep asking for refills and Shirley Temples? And why are you asking for dessert? And she was craving it, and it was just out of the ordinary. And then I think she went to the bathroom. I have it on my phone still to this day, like it was like, 13 or 14 times she went to the bathroom this one day, and I said, this is just, I don't know what's going on. So I called her mom, and we said, you know, I think we needed to bring her into the doctors the next day. And it was our last day of school, and she was so upset, because I just want to be with my friends and sorry we got to go. And it just wasn't like a really emotional, really crying, really upset. And when we got there and got the diagnosis the next day, I was just, I just remember being floored. You know, it's just like, how did we miss this? But looking back at pictures, she had, like, a dance recital, skin and bones, I remember rubbing her back one night and feeling like her spine, and I was like, that's weird. And God, just yeah, it's just, like a lot of parents say on this, how'd I miss it? How'd I miss it, but, but here we are. There we were. So

Scott Benner 6:05
I listen, I literally joke to my wife, we were in a hotel room. We were getting the kids, like, washed and everything, and Arden comes, like, banging out, like, two years old in a diaper. And I looked at my wife and said, Hey, is she like, going for, like, heroin chic or something, like, what's happening here, you know what? I mean, like, and like, she's really thin, but, I mean, you know, so cut yourself a break, because I didn't go, I wonder if something's wrong, you know, like, I said the first part and didn't say the second part. But I know, I know you feel those

"Mike" 6:35
photos when they come up, baby, or they're still really hard to look back on, yeah, when you see where she was at right before diagnosis, just, man, you know, it's

Scott Benner 6:43
Yeah, but you knew enough to say, like, we have to go talk to a doctor, sure, 100% okay, did you go right to the hospital, or did you go to a physician? Went

"Mike" 6:53
to the physicians, and then they did, you know, they did some blood work, and then they did a finger prick. And, you know, I think it was pretty obvious to them. Yeah, it was pretty obvious. And they said, we just want to do one more test. And then when they did, I think it was the A 1c test or something, yeah. And they just basically said, you know, this is what it is, and you guys need to get to the emergency room right now. And I remember just thinking like, I'm about to go back to work, you know, she's about to go back to school for last day. We just thought, we didn't know what we thought at that point, and then it was just like, wow. And then just everything was just so real and so hyper focused, of all right, let's go. Let's get there, and let's see what is going to happen in the next three days. Was just so much, you know, crazy

Scott Benner 7:34
at that point. Do you and your ex have a contentious relationship? Is it good? Like, where were you at that point?

"Mike" 7:42
I mean, good enough. It's one of those things where, when it comes to our daughter, we mostly get on the same page. So when it was something like that, it was just all right, let's go. All that matters is her, and let's, let's get headed there. You know, I would say that for me, you know, going through that, seeing your daughter kind of in that, in that state, it's really hard to see as a parent. But then, kind of joke, the worst part for me was staying in the hospital room for like, two nights, and having to, having to spend a lot of quality time with me, the ex, and my daughter that was, that was rough, you know, reminded you why you're divorced, for

Scott Benner 8:21
sure. Give me a little context. How long had you been married before you were divorced, and how long had you been divorced for by the time the diagnosis happened?

"Mike" 8:27
Yeah. So we're married just over five years, and then we were divorced. By the time diagnosis happened, we were divorced for like, nine years, so it'd been, it'd been a good chunk of time, yeah.

Scott Benner 8:39
And so during those nine years, you just see each other, like, hand offs, right?

"Mike" 8:44
It was mostly hand offs, but I mean all the activities too, and school activities, sports activities, okay, we had, like, some mutual friends, but sometimes it was more than that. Unfortunately, just because I was the last to get, like, remarried in my single years, it was tough. I was definitely I felt like controlled. I would do anything to see my daughter follow, like, any rules that the other side set. I would do anything to get extra time beyond, like, you know, what we agreed upon, and stuff like that. There's a lot of things I did that I don't do now, now that I'm remarried and have, like, a another partner, kind of in my year, like, hey, you know this isn't, isn't how it has to be, and stuff like that. I

Scott Benner 9:20
don't know another way to say this. Like, was she fcking with you so that you could and you took it so that you could see your daughter more? I think it

"Mike" 9:27
was more just, if they needed favors or calling the shots, she knew, like, I wasn't gonna, like, balk, yeah, it was definitely able to see her more or or just things like, outside of what we agreed upon. Nothing like crazy bad. But it was just, I guess I didn't have a backbone at the time, and I'd do whatever it was to see my daughter.

Scott Benner 9:43
No, I understand. Okay, so All right, so that's the timeline for that. I see you guys are in the hospital having a family sleepover. Is that confusing to your daughter that the two of you were together like that for so long? Do you think?

"Mike" 9:55
No, I mean, I never really talked to her about it, actually, like, I don't think it was even something that, like, she. You wish, you know, like, somehow some kids wish, like, Oh, I wish my parents to get back together. I think she was smart enough to know, like, the only good thing about our divorce was she was young. She was wasn't even two yet, so doesn't even recall, like, the three of us living together, yeah, and it's kind of like what she's used to had been like, living, you know, with two separate houses and stuff. So I think maybe for her, maybe it was comforting that both my parents there, but anyone, even her at 10 years old, could see how clearly different the two of us are and how we operate and how it's like oil and

Scott Benner 10:28
water. Yeah, it makes sense other autoimmune in your ex wife's side or your side,

"Mike" 10:34
not on my side, but ex wife, I think there's, like, some thyroidism and maybe like something else, but a long time ago, like one person may have been, like diabetic might even been type two, not sure, 100% okay, but we're, we're wondering too, if we've heard all these rumors about the rise of diagnoses after covid or something like that. Like, who knows? I mean, honestly, it's one of these things where I go back and, like, how did it happen?

Scott Benner 10:59
Where'd it come from? Did your daughter have covid? Yep, she did, okay. How long before she was diagnosed?

"Mike" 11:07
I think she had it, but we didn't know at the time. We thought it was just like the cold, like everyone did. So it probably would have been, I would say less than a year. I'd probably say about, like eight months or so.

Scott Benner 11:17
She had covid. Like, early 2020, late 2019, early.

"Mike" 11:21
Like, I would say the spring, or like summer 2020, something like that. Oh, okay. Oh,

Scott Benner 11:26
once you get through the hospital situation, I mean, I assume you're on some sort of a schedule. She spends certain amount of time here. Tell me what that schedule was prior to the to the diagnosis.

"Mike" 11:35
So it was like a every other weekend thing. But then when it's not my weekend, that would have the Thursday before overnight and the Monday after overnight as well. When it's not my weekend, okay, I have like, a 14 day rotation. It was like five overnights out of 14, and I would see after school sometimes too. Just not, like overnight.

Scott Benner 11:55
But if I was going to categorize it, I'd say she lived with her mom and she visited you. That's the vibe.

"Mike" 12:00
Yeah. I mean, it's definitely not 5050, it is in the summertime,

Scott Benner 12:04
okay, but during school, it's for school reasons. Yep, okay. Is that how you wanted it, or is that how it ended up?

"Mike" 12:11
No, definitely not. Went to court a couple times, and you know, it was just one was when it first happened, and it was what it was, and another time was when she was a little bit older, probably, like a year, I would say it was right before the diagnosis, but during, like, the covid time, when we're kind of running, like on a 5050, schedule because of the covid time in two households. So I thought, hey, this is how it's been for most of covid and she's older, you know, from when we first agreed upon the custody stuff. So maybe it's time to go back and just say, hey, this house been working during covid. This is what the plan I want, you know, like 5050, and easy rotation that we've been doing. But it wasn't seen that way. It was seen she's still too young, even though she was a sixth grader, and they thought the half hour drive was too much, getting her up early in the morning, even though she gets up the same time at the mom. So it was very confusing, frustrating. So I was like, Well, I guess it's just not in my it's not on the cards for me to get 5050, so then we settled on summertime only and ran back the old schedule during the school year. So yeah, 100% didn't want that. I was just, it's all about time for me, like it was all about I just wanted time with my daughter. I didn't care about child support. I didn't care about any of the other stuff. It was all about time, you know, and when that didn't happen, it it was definitely

Scott Benner 13:23
frustrating. Yeah, okay, do you have kids with your new wife? No, no. Four dogs, though, four dogs and then, and then your daughter comes half time in the summer. And the way you just described it, okay, your intake is pretty simple, right? You're just, you know, here, I'll read it to you, because you probably wrote it a long time ago, and you might not even remember. Let's see co parenting, a type one with an ex wife, from a mom dad perspective, more contentious relationships than I've heard other divorced parents talk about when they were interviewed, and now I've taken the lead on diabetes care. So first, first, like when care is being set up initially, and that's, you know, that's the setup. She's there, then she's back, and she's forth. I mean, it's hard enough. You don't have this experience, but a lot of us do. It's hard enough coming to consensus when you live together and you're not divorced, on how to take care of diabetes. So what ends up happening do, does one of you come up with a way you do it? The other one does it a different way? Do you come together and make a decision like, how does that all work? About management, the brand new twist insulin pump offers peace of mind with unmatched personalization and allows you to target a glucose level as low as 87 there are more reasons why you might be interested in checking out twist. But just in case that one got you twist.com/juicebox. That's twist with two eyes.com/juicebox. You can target glucose levels between 87 and 180 it's completely up to you. In addition to precision, insulin. Delivery that's made possible by twist design. Twist also offers you the ability to edit your carb entries even after you've bolused. This gives the twist loop algorithm the best information to make its decisions with, and the twist loop algorithm lives on the pump, so you don't have to stay next to your phone for it to do its job. Twist is now available in select areas. So if you'd like to learn more or get on the wait list, go to twist.com/juicebox. That's twist with two eyes.com/juicebox. Get on the twist wait list and be notified as soon as it's available in your area. Links in the show notes. Links at Juicebox podcast.com. The contour next gen blood glucose meter is sponsoring this episode of The Juicebox podcast, and it's entirely possible that it is less expensive in cash than you're paying right now for your meter through your insurance company. That's right. If you go to my link, contour next.com/juicebox you're going to find links to Walmart, Amazon, Walgreen, CVS, Rite, aid, Kroger and Meijer. You could be paying more right now through your insurance for your test strips in meter than you would pay through my link for the contour next gen and contour next test strips in cash. What am I saying? My link may be cheaper out of your pocket than you're paying right now, even with your insurance. And I don't know what meter you have right now. I can't say that, but what I can say for sure is that the contour next gen meter is accurate. It is reliable, and it is the meter that we've been using for years. Contour next.com/juicebox and if you already have a contour meter and you're buying test strips, doing so through the Juicebox podcast link will help to support the show.

"Mike" 16:49
Good questions, for sure. And I would say, when this first happened, I was kind of hopeful that maybe this would be the turning point that would bring both sides together, you know, and bury the past things like that. And it did in the hospital for the first couple days when we were going through that, all that education. But then as soon as not as soon, but once, you got back home and things started to settle down, things kind of returned to what they were. So I would say two different people, and the worst thing that could have happened when we're in the hospital those initial days and getting all the information the doctor or one of the nurses like when they're going through stuff and they're talking about how to best manage diabetes and with insulin, and having her be a normal kid. And so then that's what we want for all the children. Want them to be normal. But they they said something that my ex took to heart, and still to this day, feed her whatever she wants. Give her whatever she wants. Just manage it with insulin. Everything will be fine. And it's just there's so much more that goes into it at that they didn't talk about, like, you know what we've heard from episodes from you, 15 minute dosage, and then start eating after, let things catch up, glycemic indexes, cookbooks, we're going through things like that, like we did a lot of research our side and the other side, just that mantra of, nope, whatever she needs, whatever she wants, will be solved with insulin only. That's just, there's so much more that goes into it, you know, carb counting and making sure you're correct and and not getting it wrong. So it's just two different schools of thought, you know, like my wife and I, we plan a lot of the meals and think what's going to go into it and and kind of how to keep her in a good range and not just go create. And of course, like we're not saying, like, you know, she can't do this, can't do that, but we try to be ahead of it. We try to think about what's going into her body. And she's an athlete too. So that's a whole other thing we could talk about probably after but we didn't come together like I thought we would. And to this day, it's still not, it's not the same management. So for my daughter, who already is coming from a divorce household and has to probably be two different probably be two different people in two different places. Now you have the diagnosis, now you have the management on top of it, of not the same school of thought in both houses, and it's just I feel for her, you know what I mean? No,

Scott Benner 18:51
because I'm assuming her blood sugars are more stable and less variable with you than they are at with her mom. Correct? Okay, so let's take on that for a second. So they do that thing, where they go, Hey, don't worry, this isn't gonna change your life. You just count the carbs and put in the insulin and great, that's a good starting point. There's a lot more to be said after that, but your ex just hears that and says, That's the rule. The book is closed at that point, okay? And if the blood sugar goes to 300 and stays there for two hours, as long as it comes back down, it's okay, that kind of stuff. Yep, yeah. I actually heard somebody say it's interesting watching the Facebook group, and there's a person there who's like, Hey, I'm, you know, I'm trying to figure out this spike at a meal, this pretty vicious spike went up real quickly, you know, came back down, etc, and this one person jumps on and it's like, Oh, that's okay, as long as it comes back down. And I went and looked, and I was like, Oh, this person's kids had diabetes for three months. Like, that's what they heard, you know, at the hospital. And now it's funny, because somebody steps in Facebook groups, very nice. It's not like people jump on her, but somebody steps in. And says, Hey, actually, you know, there's ways to do this where that spike doesn't happen, you don't get low later. There's a little conversation around it. And it's funny, because I thought she thought she was there to let that lady know, no, that Spike's fine, and she's about to learn instead. And that's kind of how that whole thing works. But your wife's not interested in that conversation, or she not interested in it because it was coming from you? Do you have a feeling for which it is? Today's episode is sponsored by Medtronic diabetes, who is making life with diabetes easier with the mini med 780 G system. The mini med 780 G automated insulin delivery system anticipates, adjusts and corrects every five minutes. Real world results show people achieving up to 80% time and range with recommended settings without increasing lows. But of course, Individual results may vary. The 780 G works around the clock, so you can focus on what matters. Have you heard about Medtronic extended infusion set? It's the first and only infusion set labeled for up to a seven day wear. This feature is repeatedly asked for, and Medtronic has delivered. 97% of people using the 780 G reported that they could manage their diabetes without major disruptions of sleep. They felt more free to eat what they wanted, and they felt less stress with fewer alarms and alerts you can't beat that. Learn more about how you can spend less time and effort managing your diabetes by visiting Medtronic diabetes.com/juicebox

"Mike" 21:30
I think that, I think you had hit the head of the nail on that too. I'm sure, I'm sure that has a lot to do with it. Because, like I said, before you and I came on, we were just chatting. I said, you know, I talked about a couple episodes that might be good for her to listen to, and just suggested it. And, you know, I was kind of met with, kind of too busy to to listen to that type of stuff. We're good. We're good over here, you know. And for me, I was just trying to get any resource I could. And my wife, she's been like a rock star too, like she is. We're so supportive, and she does a lot of research. And she's, she's definitely my right, right hand woman and and so supportive and helpful with all this great to bounce ideas off of and stuff like that. So and she's great with meals. She's great with planning. We're on that. We're definitely on the same page. So it's great to have that here. Let's

Scott Benner 22:14
be fair to your ex. She does. She work at the United Nations. She trying to broker a priest in Iran right now. Like, Is she very busy. No, not any more busy than regular person. Yeah, she's not a trial lawyer or something like that. Not like a big like, 20 hour a day job. Nope, definitely not. Gotcha? Okay, it's probably somewhere between I don't listen when dummy talks, and this is easier if I just ignore what's happening to her blood sugar, and I can lean on the doctor said this was okay, then I don't have to think about this

"Mike" 22:44
anymore. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's probably right. I have

Scott Benner 22:48
to tell you the number of people I've spoken to who have that opinion. They're not malicious, though. I don't think anyone sits around looks at those blood sugars and says, I know this is killing my kid, but it's easier. And the doctor said it was okay. So I'll just ignore the fact that this is not great. Now, maybe there are some people out there doing that. I don't know that would be. That would be something for them to talk about with a therapist. It's very interesting, isn't it? So, I mean, you're both in that same room, right? Like in the hospital, so how do you come away with a different idea than she came away with? Yeah, I mean, like you said, 100%

"Mike" 23:21
it's not personal. She cares about our daughter a lot, yeah, but I just think it's, it's a different kind of care. It's I, I'm more of the warrior, where she's more of the kind of laid back, like everything you know, things will find, things will work out. I think it's like that thing where it's the highs versus the lows, right? Like, where they say the the highs could kill you over time. The lows could kill you

Scott Benner 23:41
right now immediately. The idea you want to die now or later, that kind of thing. Yeah.

"Mike" 23:47
I think what happens is she's more concerned about the lows end of sentence. I'm just as concerned about the lows and the highs equally. Yeah, so if

Scott Benner 23:55
you guys didn't get certainly don't want to make you feel bad. I don't think you will. It sounds like you've had quite a little adventure. But um, so if you guys weren't divorced and this happened, you probably would have balanced each other out to some point. Yeah,

"Mike" 24:06
yeah. I think it would have been, I think would have been the same or living in the same house. It would have been different schools of thought. But like you said, would to be balanced. And I think, like you said, she would listen to dummy right a little bit,

Scott Benner 24:18
or at least it would probably be one of those situations where you're like, she's like, she's like, it's fine. You're like, you know what? I'm just gonna put a Bolus in here. Yeah. And she probably at some point would be like, Hey, listen, he's taking care of it. I'll just back up a little bit. Or maybe that would have led you to get divorced. Who knows, maybe you would have been in a mediators office and she would have been like, he is too focused on my daughter's diabetes. The doctor said it's fine, but he says it's not. And he's, you know, he's, I don't know, you know what I mean, like, you know, you might have been in there doing the same thing. You might have been like, Listen, this is very important, but she doesn't seem to care about it or understand why. And, man, it's interesting, because I think this happens to a lot of people, and then it settles into something. And definitely changes their relationship afterwards. So for you, I'm hearing you talk about, like, it's about my time with my daughter, and when I know that your motivation, just for your relationship, if I apply the kind of person I feel like you are, to the diabetes thing, my biggest heartbreak here, besides for your daughter, who I do wanna talk about, what happens when care changes, like drastically, like day to day or week to week. But my biggest like, heartbreak here for you is that I'm imagining your daughter not with you for five days in a row while her blood sugars are crazy, and there's nothing I imagine you can do about it.

"Mike" 25:34
Yeah. I mean, original reason why I wanted to come on an episode with you, and thank you for all that you do for this community, by the way, and what you've been doing for so long. I mean, so long. I mean, God, this is a godsend to find you. But what I wanted to do is back like it was an episode in November I was listening to and and a lot, and I don't listen to every episode. Obviously, there's such a great catalog, and for people out there, please listen to as much as you can. But I found, like the episodes I was coming across, I heard, you know, things about divorced parents or just separate parents, whatever, but different households, and it seemed like a lot of the time that the mom was the one that seemed a little bit more responsible, and the dad was kind of like, you know, along for the ride. Yeah, when we're at dad's like, anything goes, same thing, fun time. And, you know, blood sugars not held in check and unreachable, you know, like won't pick up the phone. I'm worried this, that and, and that's not the downplay. Those are all real concerns. But what made me want to come on originally was I'm not going to be all mailed this, mailed out, but I just want to be a voice for dads, dads and divorce or dads that are doing a good job out there as CO parents or caregivers, but even the more I listened to the more I thought about coming on today. It's not only just for like dads and trying to be a voice for dads, but for any divorced co parenting situation. It's just being on the same page and knowing that your ex does care about your child as much as you do. Could show it in different ways, but I think you hit it on the head a few minutes ago when you said about gutta under control. I think some of the things with my ex could be she knows that even when my daughter's not with me, I'm always watching on Dexcom. And now that my daughter's older, like we text a lot more than when she was first diagnosed. And I think I do handle it even when I'm not there, like my daughter knows that I'm always available to text, and she does a good amount of that, even when she's not my care. And I think, yeah, when she's with me and she's down the hall, I can sleep, sleep like a baby, except when the Dexcom alarms go off, then we're popping up like everybody does, okay, what's going on? Yeah, but the times that concern me the most, and when I'm most frightened and scared are you said it when she's not with me, when she's not my house, and I would say, Over these years, and this isn't being dramatic, but there's no pat on the back here. It sucks to have to say this, but there's four different times that blood sugar is going low, all right? It's not coming up, not coming up, and it's late at night, right? It's midnight or later. What do I do? She's not with me? Try, like, pinging her phone. Try calling her phone. She's not picking up. My daughter's a decently deep sleeper. Yeah, and then it's like, all right, gotta call the ex, because nothing's happening. And all four times totally asleep, totally out of it. Do you see what's going on? Know what's going on? You see it's in the 40s. Do you see it's dropping closer to the 30s? Like, what's happening? Like, are you up there? No, can you get up there? And then thinking to myself, like, what do I do if she doesn't pick up? Do I call the police to be like, This is the address? Like, sitting there, like, 12, one, two in the morning, kind of losing my mind. Like, do I really want to make this call? I can't just let her die. Like, this is wild, you know, but I've had to do that four different time. And then enough's enough. One of these episodes we heard about the sugar pixel. I'm like, there we go. That's happening. And knock on wood, we've had that for, I would say, a year and a half now, and I haven't had to make, like, one of those calls since you bought it for your daughter. You bought it for your ex. We'll say for my daughter. Okay,

Scott Benner 28:56
gotcha, honey, take this to your mom's put it in her room. Okay, not your room again. That's one of those things that without the divorce, the story is just, oh, my wife's a real heavy sleeper, but I hear the alarms, oh yeah, and I hear it too, how difficult the idea is. Like, like, did you ever have to call emergency services or No, no, thank God, no, right? Because it unlocks a Pandora box after that, right? He called the cops on me. Like, this happened? Like, maybe, maybe she's back at the lawyer now, like, you don't know what's gonna happen, right? Like, it's a Pandora's box you do not want to open. You're just like, but at the same time, what's the alternative? Is my daughter gonna, like, have a seizure, right? Now? Like, am I gonna wake her up in time? Maybe night? This is not a thing that doesn't happen, it does happen so, you know, and you know, 40 blood sugar that's falling you're also counting on, hoping the Dexcom is actually right, right, could already be lower than that.

"Mike" 29:51
Totally. Yes. I mean that that is a great point as well. Yeah, totally. And when you

Scott Benner 29:56
have that conversation, I love that you called her the ex, when you have that conversation. Him with the ex. Does she hear it, feel it, put it into practice, or just go, Ah, it worked out.

"Mike" 30:06
It's one of those things where we meaning, like a team effort. We had it under control and, and things are good now. I'm not looking for a thank you, you know. I mean, like, Thank you for calling, you know? But it's just a, yeah, we're all good and, and stuff like that. And it was just a situation recently, actually, where they were somewhere else. There's a whole other issue. My daughter plays basketball, and they're at like, a tournament for the weekend, and the hotel they were staying at lost power, and we've been having a big problem with now that she's a teen, and charging phones. So of course, wouldn't you know the phone was at like, 30% battery life. It's again, like 11 o'clock at night at this hotel, they don't have a backup generator there. What kind of hotels is just for the hallways, but not for the rooms? So where you gonna charge? Where you gonna the ex is staying at a different hotel down the road that had power, and it was just one of those things where going together, coming with you, doesn't want to leave. The teammates don't care about that. You know it needs to get charged. Like, we all know that her phone battery is everything with Dexcom or otherwise, yeah, well, so we have Dexcom and omnipot, like, why do we have these devices if the phone's gonna go dead? So she knew to go get her, and my daughter wasn't happy to leave the friends. But it's one of these things where, unfortunately, this diagnosis is something you have to take seriously, and you're you aren't on the same path as all your friends. Unfortunately, when it comes to something like that, if you were a non T, 1d kid and your phone's about to die, that's not cool. But I mean situation that we have to monitor either because you're not a diabetic. So for a diversary bottle, like a portable charger. This is things like that. You're always, you always have to think ahead, right? And I was not thinking about a scenario like that, happening in a hotel, not having power, her being at 30% want to go to bed with everybody else, and the thing would just die overnight, probably so, well,

Scott Benner 31:53
you'd be Kreskin if you thought of that. Like, you know what I mean? Like, that's, you know, there's a tournament we go for a thing. The kids are in one hotel. My mom's in. The other loses power, but she didn't plug her phone. I mean, Jesus, if you could have figured that out before it happened, I would have called you for stock tips.

"Mike" 32:07
I think it's just one of these things too, where, you know, as we say in this community, you know, like every day is different. We could have the same meal every day, same time, and tomorrow could be totally different from today, and expect the unexpected. And I think what I've learned from this prior to this diagnosis, I was one of these guys, not just with diabetes, but with anything if it doesn't pertain to me, if it doesn't pertain to my life or someone in my life, I hear the word, I hear the term, I see the commercials, but I don't think it doesn't impact me. Something about it now, since the diagnosis, it's like, Yeah, I hear that word, I hear diabetes, and I'm on it, and I think it's one of those things too, where, like you said, you can't game plan, but I respect the hell out of diabetes. And I think if people don't, then I think that's a major misstep like this. This is something that you have to give it respect, and having those realistic conversations. I I just had the Noah gray episode you had was awesome. I'm glad you like that. You know, we're from the northeast, so we knew of the person. What a great episode. And I think listening through that, it helped me have some conversations with my daughter, and I even had her listen to the episode. I think the diabetes community, like, has he, as he mentioned, we're a smaller community. We're growing, but we're small. You definitely feel alone sometimes, like I don't have a lot of people to talk to about diabetes, and, um, my daughter, my daughter doesn't either, but she does go to this camp every summer, and then she's going for two weeks this year. She's done for the last three, three years, and she's made some friends, and can talk to some people even when they're not at camp. Oh, there's several diabetics, and I think it's really therapeutic and helpful for her. I like when you had, like, a guest on like that that made a good impact and had a lot of great things to say, because after listening to episode, I did have some conversations with my daughter and the hard ones, right? And we reviewed some of those overnights. Do you remember that? Do you remember pre sugar pixel? Do you know what could have happened? You know? And it's like I just would have fallen asleep. No, you would have fallen asleep forever, like she didn't realize that I could have passed out. You may have passed out and never woken up, right? Geez, you're 14 years old. You don't realize that if your blood sugar continues to go down, like you can die. I

Scott Benner 34:08
know. How would she know? You don't know about mesothelioma. I'm sorry. I mean, I tried to yank out one of those diseases I heard on a commercial. I don't know how to pronounce it. You made that point earlier, like I hear things and I don't know what they are. And I thought, oh, like mesothelioma. I don't know what that is. I think it's cancer, yeah. How would she know that? I mean, I've told that story from a decade ago where I was talking to a friend of mine. They had Bolus their kid for food, and then she had to run with, like, the third kid to something, and looks to the oldest kid and says, Hey, you know, make sure he eats, because he's got all of his insulin. And and then the mom leaves with one of the kids, take her somewhere, and but then the kid don't want to eat, and the older brother just is like, man, you gotta eat that or you're gonna die. And the kid didn't had no context for that, so like no one had ever explained that to him, he was pretty young still. And when the mom gets back, the kid. Kids, like, on the floor crying, like, What do you mean? I can die? And I was like, Oh yeah, there's another hard conversation you have to have with your kids when they have diabetes, like, and when the hell's the right time to do that, you know? At what age do you explain that part to them? You know? And so I don't know that. I don't know if there's a right time or, I mean, how you're supposed to plan any of that out. I just figure it comes up at some point. And you know, you go through it, man, the whole thing's hard, but you're saying now that tell me her age again, right now,

"Mike" 35:30
1414, almost, almost 15. You

Scott Benner 35:33
guys are basically managing through text. 24/7, doesn't really matter, matter where she is,

"Mike" 35:39
yeah, and she's starting to take on some more ownership, which, which, that's what I want to honestly and, and I think talking to parents, divorced parents, or dads, or whoever's going to be, you know, maybe feeling this episode, I would say, maybe I waited too long, you know, it's been four years, but she was younger, you know, 10, whatever. But now it's to the point where, yes, I think to have the most success to try to have both houses be on the same page, regardless of the parents, 100% I think, is getting your son or daughter on board with a plan that works for them, that they could replicate at both houses. And maybe we're doing a little more practice at our house, so that way, when she's not at our house, she'll be doing things for herself with the other house, and it'll be more in line with what we want. And I would say that now that she's older and she wants that too. I mean, you know, she definitely wants to feel good, and doesn't like the highs, scared of the lows, you know, so, and it's funny now, through text, even when she's in the house, she'll go low. And usually I overdo it, right? I'll be like, do a prick. Make sure your Dexcom is right. Get a juice ready. This is, you know, all this stuff now is, don't worry, have a juice. Don't worry. I've threw activity mode on. I'm doing a perk net, so it's starting to see that now, awesome. And it's, and it's just like, Oh, awesome, you know, like, this is, this is the, this is the good stuff. Now, you know,

Scott Benner 36:59
do you think there was a time where, like, your ex wife, did she see like, I guess my question is, when your daughter was with you and you had lower stable blood sugars, more stable blood sugars? Do you think your wife, your ex wife, was panicking, like, Oh my God, look how low she is. There's gonna be a problem. Or do you think she saw it as stability? It was

"Mike" 37:17
like, one time she reached out, but I was like, I got under control. And I think as the years have gone by. It's one of those things where when she's not in her care, times off when she is in her care, she thinks about it when she's not there. I would say that's accurate. And I would also say, even when we're at events where we have to be at events like together, like CO joined, I would even say that would be the case, as I mentioned, like my daughter plays sports, even when we're at those games and stuff like, I'll be, I feel that I'm monitoring the phone a lot more, where her blood sugar's at, like, while she's playing come kind of like her eyes, like when she's playing, and when she comes for timeouts, you know, I'll send little texts of, watch this drop, watch that I just I want to go out there and play, have fun. Two opponents, right? Two opponents she has to gear up for every time she she steps on the court who she's playing against, and diabetes, you know, and everybody else has the one opponent, and I think, yeah, go have fun. Don't worry about it. Just be you go and do the thing you love to do. I'll be watching. I'll text you. We have a good system. Come for a timeout. You get subbed out, checking the phone this that All right, give a little more going active. But with her, we found that when she competes, man, does she spike, you know? I mean, it's we want her in like, the low 80s going into a game, because even if we do nothing, we found that she's almost goes up like 100 blood sugar points, like, during a game, if, if left untreated. So, oh, we're starting the game at 80. Well before you know, it shit up to a 180 and rising, you know? And then we have to interview. But we don't wait that long anymore, obviously. But it was just funny, just Oh, interesting to see level of competition stress, you know, just all that stuff, what it would do. But that's what we figured out we were we have a pretty good system. She's able to go out there and do what she likes to do. She's a basketball player. She will go out there and do what she loves to do, and we do it pretty well now, unless the pod fails or something crazy, which has had, has happened during games. And she hates sitting out, but, man, she does battle, though, and she she loves to play. So it's, it's great to see her doing her thing, whatever. And that's for other people too. Whatever your son or daughter's thing is. When you get to sit back and see them doing what they love to do, it's just great. And but for me, it's one eye on the court, one eye on the phone. I'm not on the phone, 24/7 but I'm watching I'm watching it a good deal, so I can't 100% enjoy these games, the stress of being a parent, hoping your kid does well, but then also managing diabetes as well. But I would say the ex definitely doesn't have the eye on the phone like I do, because there'll be times where things are going on and I'm already five steps ahead and already have multiple texts with our daughter, and then maybe it'll be like, Hey, do you notice this reading? And I'm like, yep, you know, but that's not every game that's like, you know, once every now and then. It's just kind of like, yeah, every game I am on this it's not like a, you know, every now and then thing,

Scott Benner 39:54
yeah, okay. How do you see the future going? She's, you know, not quite in high school. School, right? The

"Mike" 40:01
future be great. So she's just finished her freshman year of high school, okay? Future, I want her to continue to get more independence for her own care, and I think that's gonna help again by going to the summer camp. She's gone for like, two weeks this year instead, like, won the past, and she loves it, and she comes off those camps and is way more knowledgeable and, like, into it at that point. So I think just reinforcing that, and I think continuing, I want to take a step. Thank you. One of these episodes, someone had said about being like a passenger, I definitely want to transition into like that passenger mode. I told her the other day, hey, look, this summer, let's set some goals, not just for diabetes, but for plenty of things, school, work, working out. You know, basketball, diabetes care, you know, cooking stuff around the house, sure, you know, all these different things I said, I want you to take the lead more with your care. I want you to be Bolus when you think you need to. I want you to be counting carbs for these meals. I'm there to support you, and I'm going to back you up. And I will if you're making some wrong math, kind of, you know, calculations just that, not just going to let you go and fail, but I kind of want to transition here, you know, I think, I think the ex already has, which I think that's why some of the all over the place, but I think she's been trying to do stuff, and maybe she's not doing it well, like her own calculation. So I kind of want to take a step back this summer. Yeah, I want her to be doing a lot more for herself. Like, I can't be there always I will, but I can't thought of college someday right now makes me really worried. And I know that a lot of parents and a lot of episodes have addressed that, but yeah, I think just being away wherever that's going to be, it's going to be a great disservice to her, if these next three years aren't spent with her, really trying to get a control of this more for herself when she is by herself, you know. But yeah, I definitely want more independence for her and more success when it comes to managing blood sugar. Do you

Scott Benner 41:42
think you'll have any trouble separating, like letting go in some spots, or do you think you'll welcome it? I

"Mike" 41:48
think if I do it right these next three years, when she's still in the house, I think I'll feel a lot better. And I think the funny thing about that question too, is I thought about that before. I think I'm gonna be a nervous wreck in college anyways, I'll feel a little bit better having Why did divorce prepare me? Divorce is prepares me for not being with her half the time. So I think when she goes off to college, I'm going to already kind of be used to her not being into my roof. 24/7, yeah, so I'm hopeful that I'm going to feel a little bit more ready for when she's not with me, because she's not with me all the time. Anyways, that's that's least what I'm going to tell myself right now. That's what

Scott Benner 42:20
I'm going to tell myself right now. You have some hard fought lessons there about life and change. I think you you sound like you're pretty good at it, even though you don't feel like maybe the your ex wife is putting in the same kind of effort that you are or trying to understand things I also have not heard, unless you're holding back. I have not heard you know that she's attacking you or trying to stop you from managing the way you do, or anything like that. Like she's like, seems like she's let you be who you are in this situation. Is that true?

"Mike" 42:49
Definitely not an ex bashing episode, for sure. I mean, no, she knows I'm a good parent, and she trusts how much I love our daughter, and the blood sugar levels, I think, the the care that I provide when she's with me. I think it speaks to itself, and there's not a lot to probably critique. And I think because we manage differently, and maybe because of because my wife and a lot of conversations we've had, I think that maybe we're just, we're two different camps. So I think I don't want to say this and like, be mean, but I think I'm just, like, a little bit more knowledgeable about diabetes, and, like, the finer points and where I think I know a lot more about the disease, and maybe it's because of the other side being busy, or other things going on in life, or or she knows enough that she knows the basic things that she needs to know to make herself feel comfortable when her daughter's in her care and doesn't feel the need to Go the extra mile and maybe do, like, more research. I mean, that her own thing, that's fine.

Scott Benner 43:45
Does she have other children? She does. She does, right? Like so,

"Mike" 43:49
yeah. So, I mean, so you're not 100% I get to be 100% focused on our daughter when she's with me, but the other side has other children too. So I mean, and I can't pretend to know what that's like. So if I wasn't 100% focused on just like my daughter, only I imagine that there'd be things pulling me away too. So I'm just fortunate to have had just my daughter to be concerned about.

Scott Benner 44:10
Let me tell you something from a person who has two kids, sometimes when one of them leaves, you're like, Oh, good, there's like, a thing I don't have to think about right now. And at the same time, I'm always reminded of this thing I thought about my little brother, which is unfair now, because he's in his 40s, and he's a very good person. But when my little brother Rob was little, there were two states of Rob. Rob was either in trouble actively and you were aware of it, or Rob was in trouble and nobody had found out about it yet. I relate that to Arden going off to college. And you know, she's like, Oh, I can take care of this. And like, and she does. And then, you know, a month goes by and you're like, Oh, this is going well. And, you know, two months goes by, I guess it's going well, and a year goes by, and like, you know, some days you don't think about her at all, like she's just gone, you know, you realize. And hein. Site, something was happening that needed attention, that she didn't put attention to because she was away at college, and she's not 50 years old, and she doesn't, you know, she's not a parent. She's not thinking of herself the way I think of her, you know, way My wife thinks of her. So you realize that you don't know how to put it like you're getting a break, but there is just something else that's brewing right now that you're gonna have to deal with later. And I don't know if that sounds I don't know how that sounds exactly, but that's how I've tended to think about it. Like, yes, I'm getting a break now, but man, something's gonna happen later, and it's gonna be because I wasn't looking now. Now they're gonna be people who hear that and go like, Oh, that's neurotic. But I don't mean it that way. I don't mean like, I know there's problems and I'm not seeing them. I mean that something's always brewing, and eventually it comes to a head. And, you know, could you have stopped it if you were around? Probably not. Like, you know what I mean? Like, probably not. But it does give you that feeling of like, oh, at least I don't have to think about it right now. Like, somebody else is keeping her alive right now. It's not me Sure, yeah, man, I hear it. Do you think you'll have more children? Or do you think this is

"Mike" 46:06
good for you? My wife and I would definitely want to have more children. For sure, we'll see what the future holds within the cards. Yeah, like, whatever happens, happens. I love being a dad, and it's the best role ever, you know. And I've been really fortunate to have a great kid. And I just love this role so much. And I think for all the dads out there that feel the same way, you know, just continue, continue to love your kids, you know, and continue to work hard with adjusting to type one. And like you said, I mean, we can never see things coming. And I think getting back to the Getting back to the other side the X thing, I think individually, we've both done the best that we could do. She's done good care, in her eyes. For our daughter, I've done good care, and why I thought, definitely don't want to bash because, like you said, still alive. Knock on wood, never had to return to the hospital since before. You know nothing like that's never gotten to that point. So I think we're fortunate. I think I've chosen on my time when my daughter's not around, I've chosen to stay vigilant. I definitely could have turned Dexcom off if I wanted to and do it, but I don't know, there's something within me about being a parent and just like loving this kid so much and and when she's not with you, I don't know. It's just, I don't know. I just don't have it with me, I guess, to turn it off fully. But I guess that could just be me. You know

Scott Benner 47:18
could be Hey, do you have any past trauma? Did you grow up in a way that nobody took care of you? No, no,

"Mike" 47:24
no, definitely not. I had great parents. Not had, well, my dad passed away 25 years ago now, but, and that's where I got the whole like, wanting to be a dad from him, he was just like, this awesome dad growing up, modeled all these things for me, just my biggest cheerleader. My mom was there too, like not but just because he's not around anymore, but biggest cheerleader connected through sports. Always, always there. Funny, you know, just could feel the love like was put on this earth to be a dad. And I think when I first got divorced and was trying to make sense of all that, I remember saying to myself, and I stand by this to this day, I remember thinking, You know what? I was meant to be, a father, but not necessarily a

Scott Benner 48:07
husband. I was gonna ask you, I don't know if it's the two person or not, but like, who told who they wanted

"Mike" 48:12
to get divorced. It was mutual in the end, but she definitely did initially.

Scott Benner 48:15
Was it something that surprised you when you heard it the first time? Or did you understand

"Mike" 48:20
I kind of saw it coming. I saw, like, some signs, probably two, three months before it happened,

Scott Benner 48:26
because of she didn't particularly appreciate you, or because she had something else going on that she was interested in. I

"Mike" 48:33
think it was one of these things where maybe it goes to that statement I said about put on here to be a dad, not necessarily the husband, meaning, like, a lot of my attention went to our daughter, and maybe not as much She was jealous. You think, I mean, it was, like, comments made about things I wasn't, like, saying or doing to, like, put her up on a pedestal anymore. But it's one of those things where it's, Hey, I'm in it with you. Like, raising a baby, you know. So

Scott Benner 48:59
I'm putting effort into the into the family, into the baby. Now, hey, she would not like being a straight guy that once you get pregnant, because my wife was like, Oh yeah, hold this while me and the kid are living and I was like, oh okay, God, yeah, I see getting my wife pregnant turned me from my wife's boyfriend to my son's major domo. Nevertheless, if you don't mind, I'd like to dig back into the diabetes stuff for a second. I do wanna understand, can you explain an average graph with your daughter living with your ex and your daughter living with you? Like, I wanna understand how much difference there was between because that's difficult, right? If she's spiking to 300 and staying up there for two hours and crashing back down, and they're catching lows and like, she's up, down, up, down, up down, with one house, and on the other house, she's stable. I don't think there's any doubt she feels better in one of those situations. Like, was it that variable?

"Mike" 49:52
Yeah, I mean, it's, it's those things where you could be down, you could be down, like in the 60s. And then, yeah, up, then over treating. And then you're up in, like, the 240s you know, and rising things like that. There's a lot of, like, up down. There's a lot of peaks and valleys when she's with the other side with us, because of a lot of your episodes, because of,

Scott Benner 50:14
you know, just understanding how to use

"Mike" 50:16
insulin, understanding, like, how to be confident and cold with insulin, things like that. You know, not afraid to get ahead of these eyes that are starting to go up and realize, like, Hey, if you come down, then we have a plan in place. But definitely, I can't stand when you're up in the two hundreds or because you once you're there, you know, you're there for hours, and it's just, God, that's just miserable. And she must feel miserable. She'll try to say like, oh, you know, it is what it is like, Oh, I feel like I might have a headache, or I might just that, or she downplays it, but she must feel awful. And I would love her to be, you know, for me, like, if it, if she could, like, live in, I would say mid 80s to say, like, 120 something like that. I mean, no, that's unrealistic. But if you could, like, be there a lot, which I feel like she's close to that when she's with us, because we're we're hitting things off. Like, I don't want we have the thing set for like 200 but I haven't moved mine down to like 180 like, I don't even want it, and that's still too high, but it's just she hates hearing the neat, the noises, because I've talked to her about that before, like, hey, why don't you lower your stuff on Dexcom so we can hit a little bit earlier. But I think it's part embarrassment too. Like when she's in school, she doesn't want to be center of attention. She doesn't want people looking around. There's a funny story, there's a funny story, though. Actually, it was last year, and she transferred to a new school, so not everybody knew that she was a diabetic, and she did a good job, like, kind of telling people she needed to, but kind of kept it to herself from other people. And it was towards the end of the school year, and she does really good about not wanting that alarm to go off in school, but one day it beeped like crazy, and the teacher went running over and picked up the phone. Thought it was like, the phone ringing, and some other classmates, like, knew what was going on, and they kind of looked at her, and people started to giggle a little bit. And the teacher had no idea what was going on, but my daughter thought was the funniest thing, like she was dying laughing, because then the teacher went next door and said, was that your phone or mine? And then people are just starting to, like, roll in the classroom. You know, you never said anything, but she just doesn't want to stand out, you know? And I think that's part of the thing, where it troubles me sometimes, or I'm left clueless, where you don't want to stand out. You don't want alarms going off. You want people to to know, like, what's going on. You want to kind of handle in house, but, you know, why not set your alarms a little bit lower? Why not get ahead of it so that way you're not up high? Not up high? Why are you on board with it when you're with us, like you're proud and you like, we don't want to put all the attention on diabetes. 20% you're more than diabetic, right? But, but she is proud on those days where things are really controlled well, whether it's with me or or with the ex or whatever, but she's proud, and she'll say, like, Oh my God. Like, I haven't been out of range, or I haven't been high or low for X amount of hours or for a day and a half. So she wants that. But then when she's with me, we take steps to try to make that happen. When she's killed her mom's I feel like, sometimes I feel like it's like men in black, you know, it's like, you just forget everything, just because you're in a different house, you know? And why you okay with it being in, like, the 240s 250s approaching 300 like you don't want that for yourself, so why? Oh, I just made a miscalculation. Or, Oh, it's fine. It'll come down like that sounds like, not your words.

Scott Benner 53:08
She kind of adopts the person's Yes, like vibe that she's with at the time, chameleon, yeah, well, yeah. And probably trying to make you, well, listen, she's probably trying to make you happy and trying to make her mom happy at

"Mike" 53:19
the same time, exactly. And yes, that's a that's a great point, right? Yeah, I would start looking for a therapist.

Scott Benner 53:27
Now, I'll tell you, man, being being from a divorced family is not easy. It just, it really isn't, probably most people's reality, but it brings things up. You just, I don't know. You just, you don't realize till they're happening. And sometimes you don't realize till they're happening too late, even just talking with Arden yesterday, I was trying to explain to her. I said, Look, I know this is such a weird thing that people say all the time, and I hate it when people say it, but if you had a kid, you'd know what I was saying, and one day you might, and then you're gonna look back on this moment and think, Oh, this is what he was talking about, right? And I said, But you know, if I don't do something, listen, Arden and I are, it's funny. We're in the middle of a divorce of sorts too, right? Like we're uncoupling a child with diabetes father relationship and turning it into an adult with diabetes father relationship. And it doesn't happen overnight. It's not like a thing that just happens, you know, because you flip a switch, or you decide it's a process, and we're making our way through it, and that's, you know, I think it's going pretty well. Actually, I'm sure she thinks it's going terribly and because it's not happening more immediately. But we were talking about, like, how much involvement like to have, and how that involvement as she gets older feels differently to her, like it's just what's happening. Like, listen, I've interviewed enough young people. I understand the process that we're in right now. And I said to her, Listen, if you say I'm fine, I've got it and you've got it, that's awesome, because I'm not looking to think about this either. I. Know, you probably think that I'm super excited to talk about your diabetes. I'm really not. And I said I'd like us to move into a more mature relationship as fast as possible. I said, I told her I was like, you and I have, like, the same personality, like, when we just hanging out together, we have a great time. I'm like, I want more of that. I want more of an adult relationship and adult father daughter relationship. And I don't wanna talk about this diabetes stuff all the time either, and by the way, we don't, but the spot where we talk about it is when she says, I'm fine, I've got it, and then doesn't do the things that indicate she's fine, she's got it. And I'm like, so how long am I supposed to not say anything. If you say I've got it, I've got it, I've got it, but whatever you're doing is not working. And I know the simple answer, like, as an example, the other night, her pod ran out of insulin while she was at, like, working out. So she, you know, she came home. I think she was probably only without insulin for like, 20 minutes. She came home, she changed her bike. She didn't need me to tell her. She came home, she changed her pod, she put it on and, you know, she made a Bolus and everything, but then she ate a little like, pretty soon after that. Excuse me, pretty soon after that. Oh, by the way, it's good news that my voice is giving up on Thursday when the cruise is, uh, on Monday. I'm sure I'll be great by the next the next week of talking to people for five days in a row, I just realized it wasn't an aggressive of enough Bolus on the new pod, especially if she was going to eat afterwards. And she's on an algorithm. So the algorithm believes, like, you know, like, I we did what we're supposed to do, our settings are good. And what I was trying to say to her was, like, I let her go for a little while, meaning, like an hour or so. And then I walked up to her and I said, Hey, I think a temp basal here would cut this number down more quickly. She didn't have a good reaction to me, you know, suggesting that. And she said, I'm fine. I've got it. And I said, Martin, if you had it, it wouldn't be like this now, because you would have made the adjustment quite some time ago, and we wouldn't be in a situation. You wouldn't be in this situation. But why do I like freudianly slip and say we wouldn't be in this situation because it's also nine o'clock at night, and the algorithm is going to keep pouring insulin on this problem. It's going to break it eventually, and you're going to get low at four o'clock in the morning, and then I'm going to wake up, and you're going to wake up, and, you know, we're, everyone's gonna have to take care of it. And then blah, blah, blah, and then, you know, etc. So exactly that happened, because I understand how the insulin works, especially in her right like so exactly this thing happens. It wasn't four o'clock in the morning. I missed a little bit on that. It was five o'clock in the morning, and then I was up for two hours after that, and I spent the rest of the day tired. And she said, No, I woke up for the low and I took care of it. And I said, No, you did. You woke up and you took care of it, and then your blood sugar shot up into the two hundreds while you were sleeping. So you took care of the low, but just created a different issue that I took care of. If nine hours before that, you would have made a more aggressive Bolus at the pod change and added a temp basal to the food. None of this would have happened. So when you tell me, I'm fine, I've got it, you actually have to have it if you want me to be able to let go in my mind. And I was like, and that's the thing we're trying to get to. You can't just say I've got it, I've got it. And every parent listening is laughing, because every kid does this, not just about diabetes, but everything else. I got it, I got it, I'm fine. I got it, I got it, I'm fine, right? She goes, Well, just, I'll take care of it, and I'll learn from it. She's being very reasonable, like, you know, you know. And I said, No, I want you to have these experiences, learn from them. I was like, but the experience doesn't need to last nine hours and end with, like, carbs in the middle of the night that end up with a high blood sugar later. I was like, There's you can have that experience without, without all this happening. But the thing I wanted her to really take away wasn't going back to like, if she had a kid, she'd understand, I'm not thinking just about this, like you're just thinking about this situation. I was like, and this might be unfair, but I'm thinking about the 500 young people I've spoken to in their 30s who tell stories about, you know, when I was college aged, I, you know, wasn't as on top of my diabetes, I should have my parents tried to help. I yelled at them, told them to leave me alone, that I was okay. And now it's 10 years later. And you know what? I wish they wouldn't have given up and I was like, and so between, I wish they wouldn't have given up. And some of them are not just saying that from a relationship standpoint, some of them are saying, I have issues now. I have medical issues now, and I needed somebody's help, and I didn't realize it at the time, and I even maybe went so far as to push help away. And I was like, so you have to understand that from my perspective, me just saying, No, it's okay. I won't think about it anymore. It feels like I'm trying to it feels like I'm killing you, like some way, like, either, you know, like in one of the ways that I've heard people describe over and over again. And I was like, so we need to find a better way to uncouple the. This, what used to be a child with type one relationship to an adult with type one relationship. We need to, you know, amend this and make it so that it's more workable. So we put a plan in place. Like, we have a couple of sticking points, so we picked one, we put a plan in place for that. And actually, it's something we're doing right now. It's going very well so far, but it has to do with, like, you know, we set her up to do something, and then the deal is, is that I don't look at it again for two weeks well, and she's going to manage that thing, and then two weeks from now, we'll assess it and see how we went. But it's on her to do the thing, and it's on me to not mention the thing. So, like, that's what we're doing right now. I don't know how it'll work out. I'll let you all know when I know it's an interesting process, because it's not going to stay the way it is. It might not just gently transition to the next way it goes. It's tough man, because she'll go away to college and she'll take good care of herself. Like, that was Arden's point during the conversation. She's like, you know, I'm not doing the job you did, like, a 1c wise and stuff. But she's like, but I kept my a 1c in the sixes at college, and that's amazing. And I thought, and I said, Yeah. And by the way, I've told her that 1000 times. She knows that's amazing, because I'm the one who told her, I'm like, This is amazing. Most kids don't go away to college, keep their a 1c in the sixes. Like, it's really awesome, you know, but it doesn't make the other thing not worrisome, because of all the people that I've spoken to who you know, you can go back into the first 10 episodes of the podcast, right? There's a episode about, maybe in the top 30, like, episodes about, like, roller coasters, and this woman comes on and tells this story about, like, you know, the doctor told me that up to 200 was okay, and then I would let my kid's blood sugar sit at 200 then it went to 210 and I thought, well, that's only 10 more than 200 and then when it was at 250 I was like, it's only 50 more than he said. But now the kid's blood sugar's at 250 when you really want it to be 80. So is it 50 points higher than you want it to be, or is it, you know? Is it you know, 170 points higher than you want it to be? And she talked about how you can just lull yourself to sleep, that frog in the pot idea. And I know that's what happens to a person, so I don't know how I'm supposed to know that not say anything. And that was my point to art. And I was like, if you had a kid, you'd say something too. So anyway, good luck. Yeah, I was gonna say you've been getting divorced. Sucked way to get wait till this happens. You

"Mike" 1:02:29
hear me, give me a sneak peek of seven years from now. All right, yeah, yeah. And

Scott Benner 1:02:32
I don't know if you can avoid it or not. I don't know if it's not just part of the process of of this, of the maturation of your relationship, you know, yeah, what a bummer. Good luck everybody. No, it'll be and it's gonna be fine, but it's a lot of work. It's just a lot of work. There are times where even, like, I'm getting older, I'm like, I need things to not be so much work. But that doesn't just because I need it. Doesn't mean that's how it how it goes. Honestly, I think art and I in a really good place. And I think even, like, a year from now, when she turns 21 or so, I actually think we'll be coasting by then. And I'm not upset that this process took the time it took. It took what it took, and and she's also her outcomes are really great. So ah, did you like this? Did you get everything out you wanted to say, or you got more?

"Mike" 1:03:21
Yeah, no, I think, think I say everything I wanted to say. I really appreciate the talking to you today, and it was awesome to come on this really, really, really great.

Scott Benner 1:03:30
Oh, I think that's lovely of you. I appreciate you saying that I and you saying earlier, I didn't really mention it, but the podcast was really helpful for you. I'm, I'm thrilled about that. I'm super happy you found it and that it, that it did what it did for you and your daughter.

"Mike" 1:03:44
Yeah, the podcast and the Facebook community. I mean, it's, it's been a blessing for sure. Don't know where we'd be if we didn't find this community, like, honestly, the work that you do, and everyone that joins it, it's just, it's so great to see people helping

Scott Benner 1:03:55
each other. Yeah, no, I agree. I can't. I keep thinking that, um, I, you know, I have a get together, coming up with like 100 of my listeners. And I'm like, I was thinking about this morning. I'm like, am I gonna cry when these people, when I look up and see all these people together and they're meeting each other and having, like, a connection? I'm like, I'm gonna cry. Like, there's gonna be pictures of me crying. I like, I know for sure. I'm excited to to be more present in that present place sounded like a hippie. Like, I'm not, I'm not sorry. I'm not from San Francisco, but I'm super excited. That was it. There was a knock. It wasn't a knock. It was a joke to Erica. I hope she hears it. Like, once, I'm immersed in that and I can see it happening, like, not just for five minutes or an hour, like, you know, I've been to plenty events where people meet each other, but it's a couple hours here and there, but like to really sit with them for days and days. I'm excited to, like, figure out what it is that is touching them at that point. Like, I want to hear about that from them. So anyway, I mean,

"Mike" 1:04:51
it's a celebration of your impact and legacy too. I mean, that's powerful all you've done. I mean, that's gonna be really cool for you. What a great experience. And for the people that are gonna be. Either I gotta

Scott Benner 1:05:00
get you to write my bio. That was awesome. I've never once thought I had a legacy, but when you settle I was like, Yeah,

"Mike" 1:05:09
my mom said I should always write some kind of greeting cards. But

Scott Benner 1:05:11
no, yeah, she might not be wrong. I used to think I was gonna write funny greeting cards, but I didn't think anybody would buy them. This is really great of you. I appreciate you taking the time. If you hold on for one second, I'll say goodbye to you. Off the air. Hold on one second.

Thanks for tuning in today, and thanks to Medtronic diabetes for sponsoring this episode. We've been talking about Medtronic mini med 780 G system today, an automated insulin delivery system that helps make diabetes management easier day and night, whether it's their meal detection technology or the Medtronic extended infusion set, it all comes together to simplify life with diabetes. Go find out more at my link. Medtronic diabetes.com/juicebox the episode you just enjoyed was sponsored by the twist a ID system powered by tide pool. If you want a commercially available insulin pump with twist loop that offers unmatched personalization and precision or peace of mind, you want twist twist.com/juicebox having an easy to use and accurate blood glucose meter is just one click away. Contour, next.com/juicebox That's right. Today's episode is sponsored by the contour. Next Gen blood glucose meter. Hey, thanks for listening all the way to the end. I really appreciate your loyalty and listenership. Thank you so much for listening. I'll be back very soon with another episode of The Juicebox podcast. The podcast contains so many different series and collections of information that it can be difficult to find them in your traditional podcast app sometimes. That's why they're also collected at Juicebox podcast.com go up to the top, there's a menu right there. Click on series, defining diabetes. Bold beginnings, the Pro Tip series, small sips, Omnipod, five ask Scott and Jenny. Mental wellness, fat and protein, defining thyroid. After Dark, diabetes, variables, Grand Rounds, cold, wind, pregnancy, type two, diabetes, GLP, meds, the math behind diabetes, diabetes myths and so much more, you have to go check it out. It's all there and waiting for you, and it's absolutely free. Juicebox podcast.com if you're looking to meet other people living with type one diabetes, head over to Juicebox podcast.com/juice cruise, because next June, that's right, 2026, June. 21 the second juice Cruise is happening on the celebrity beyond cruise ship. It's a seven night trip going to the Caribbean. We're going to be visiting Miami Coke, okay? St, Thomas and St Kitts, yeah, the Virgin Islands. You're gonna love the Virgin Islands. Sail with Scott the Juicebox community on a week long voyage built for people and families living with type one diabetes. Enjoy tropical luxury, practical education and judgment free atmosphere. Perfect day at Coco Bay St, Kitts st, Thomas, five interactive workshops with me and surprise guests on type one, hacks and tech, mental health, mindfulness, nutrition, exercise, personal growth and professional development, support groups and wellness discussions tailored for life with type one and celebrities, world class amenities, dining and entertainment. This is open from every age you know, newborn to 99 I don't care how old you are. Come out. Check us out. You can view state rooms and prices at Juicebox podcast.com/juice cruise. The last juice cruise just happened a couple weeks ago. 100 of you came. It was awesome. We're looking to make it even bigger this year. I hope you can check it out. The episode you just heard was professionally edited by wrong way recording, wrong wayrecording.com.

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Steven, Stacy, and Nicole join after spotting Scott’s FB post about a hiccup with a scheduled episode—stepping in to share their voices and stories with the community.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends and welcome back to another episode of The Juicebox podcast.

I just had somebody not cancel, but they're on vacation and their internet connection sucks, so I rescheduled her, and I'm putting up a post on my private Facebook group right now. It says, Who wants to record a podcast episode right now? And I'm just going to hit post right now. Ready? It's 11:40am I am here to tell you about juice cruise 2026 we will be departing from Miami on June 21 2026 for a seven night trip, going to the Caribbean. That's right, we're going to leave Miami and then stop at Coco k in the Bahamas. After that, it's on to st, Kitts, St Thomas and a beautiful cruise through the Virgin Islands. The first juice Cruise was awesome. The second one's going to be bigger, better and bolder. This is your opportunity to relax while making lifelong friends who have type one diabetes. Expand your community and your knowledge on juice cruise 2026 learn more right now at Juicebox podcast.com/juice. Cruise. At that link, you'll also find photographs from the first cruise. Nothing you hear on the Juicebox podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan. This episode is sponsored by the tandem Moby system, which is powered by tandems, newest algorithm control iq plus technology. Tandem Moby has a predictive algorithm that helps prevent highs and lows, and is now available for ages two and up. Learn more and get started today at tandem diabetes.com/juicebox this episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by the Dexcom g7 the same CGM that my daughter wears. Check it out now at dexcom.com/juicebox All right, I just had somebody not cancel, but they're on vacation and their internet connection sucks, so I rescheduled her. Caitlin, that was you, in case you're listening. And I'm putting up a post on my private Facebook group right now. It says, Who wants to record a podcast episode right now? You need a mic with headphones, a quiet space and solid internet connection. Will take about an hour, no video free for all. And then I put the link to this recording right here, and I'm just gonna hit post right now. Ready? It's 11:40am post, all right, let's see if people pop in or not. I think this is interesting. Oh, you're gonna probably want me to keep talking. I just want to sit here quietly. Could I just sit here quietly? And then rob edit out the quiet and then tell us how long it's been since somebody popped on maybe, excuse me, I know Rob loves it when I use a metal cup with ice in it. Sorry, Rob, oh, here comes somebody. Steven. Steven, hey, hey, man, how are you going? Scott, good, good. How are you

Stephen 3:09
all right? So, yeah, I'm looking forward to seeing you on the boat in the physical sense.

Scott Benner 3:15
Me too. I can't wait to meet everybody. It's going to be fantastic. Yeah, I didn't know Ryan was going, that's cool. There's a lot, a lot of people coming. I couldn't imagine, honestly, like, when the person approached me to do this, I said, Listen, we got to have an out. And she, she says, what? I was like, it was like, when three people want to do this, I said, I'm going to be embarrassed. Like, you know what? I mean? Like, we're gonna have to pretend it's not happening. It'll be interesting. Yeah? And sure enough, we got 100 people coming. It's awesome. You know? Yeah, you know, yeah, and she wants to do it again next year. She's already like, we should set it up again for next year. I think it's going to be great. I think it'll grow. And I was like, so we'll see. Let's, let's look into it. So, yeah, I

Stephen 3:53
mean, it is overwhelming though, setting up a boat and getting on a boat and all that stuff. Oh, still.

Scott Benner 3:59
Yeah, no kidding. I mean, it also taught me that I got to try to do something on land too. So I'm working. I'm working right now.

Stephen 4:09
Good, that would be nice, you know, no, that would be nice to meet at a location or something like that. That'd be cool. Yeah,

Scott Benner 4:14
I'm trying to figure it out. I'm going to start slowly with touch by type one is going to help me set up an event in Philadelphia, and then we'll kind of like, go through the process, see how it works. And then how is your friends for life, relationship with them? So I've never been there before. I'm going, you haven't been to one never. I've never been there. I'm going, I'm going, this year. Oh, you're gonna go to are you in Orlando? Yes, hey, I'll see you there. Are you gonna be there? Oh, no kidding. Oh, that's awesome. Yeah, no, I'll be there, yeah. So, yeah, I'm doing the cruise, getting off the cruise I record for a week, and then after the fourth of July, I fly down to

Stephen 4:51
back again. It's like, bang, bang. No, that's great, because I went to Disneyland last year, right? It was the first I, you know, for years and years and years. Just thought that I'd like to go, and I went, and I was just blown away by how nice the people were, how comfortable I got to meet with ginger there. That was interesting. Yeah, that's awesome. And it was just a really warm, fun open event. And then that, you know, kind of like a camp environment, really. I've

Scott Benner 5:19
heard that even though it's children with diabetes, that a lot of type ones, adults come

Stephen 5:23
Yeah, the one, they said, the one in Orlando, is going to be more than 50% Oh, no kidding, yeah, that's going to be it's really risen quite a bit. And they said his daughter, the one that started it, is a nurse now, and a CDE. And she said, Yeah, home that the me's are coming back. So they're now adults with kids. Oh, that's awesome. So they're on their, you know, they're basically in their second, third generation of people that have been involved in

Scott Benner 5:50
this. Oh, it's crazy. Yeah, I got approached by tandem, and they asked if I'd come down and do some stuff with them at the event. So I'm going to, I'm going to have my own booth, but I'll also be working with them a little bit. I'm gonna be doing like, on the like, kind of like, on the fly interviews with little kids with type one. Oh, cool, yeah. So we're gonna sit down and, like, talk to little kids and record it, I think, for social media and stuff like that, and then the rest of the time I'll be at my booth, you know, trying to tell people about the podcast.

Stephen 6:21
Yeah. I mean, the new algorithm is so much greater for the kids. It just, I'm blown away at the flexibility in the new algorithm. Oh, for control. IQ, yeah, yeah, it is really nice. In fact, Joanne Milo, I'm involved in a good group with her. In fact, that's kind of one of the things I wanted to tell you is the old people. We need some podcasts on old people

Scott Benner 6:44
with type one for ways to, like, manage, or

Stephen 6:47
No, just the whole package, the entire package. Medical challenges are number one, which is managing and being able to manage at that age, and then the things you have to overcome in that process, there's a website that Joanne's leading the push to put together, which is a website for older diabetes, and it's called T, T 1d to 100 is going to be the name of the site, and it is going to have all kinds of resources and information and stuff that will be accessible by anyone, and then lead them in the right direction. It's kind of like, in some ways, I think of it's going to be like Jay Jones 504 site, where you go up and there's resources, and you can look at resources. It won't be a Facebook page, but it the race resources will be there. So we've been putting together resources, and it's just an audience that is just kind of a forgotten audience, and people don't realize the challenges, the extra challenges, yeah,

Scott Benner 7:44
well, I can imagine how easily it would be to get to get forgotten, because nobody's selling to you anymore, right? So you're not, you're not a focus for that. It's nothing fun about it. No, you can't put it on social media. It doesn't, it doesn't have that kind of judge. How do you think it gets out to people, though? How do you reach the people? Let them know that the information is there.

Stephen 8:01
That's part of what you know. Joanna, actually, she's she may be able to partner with taking care of your diabetes group, and both doctors have talked to her and said, we've got to do a show on it. Okay? So that may be one opening. And then, of course, you know, be nice to have one on your side too. No, I would. There's a lot of silent on the Facebook page. There's a lot of silent people up there. Because if there's something up there about Medicare, all of a sudden you're getting all kinds of questions.

Scott Benner 8:26
What I would want to do is build out a list of of important points and then put a series together around it.

Stephen 8:33
Oh, that would be fantastic, because the aspects would be something like, how do you get coverage, you know, and how do you deal with the pharmacist, and what do you do when you go to a hospital? And those are the kind of the groupings. And actually, the groupings that she'll have on the website will be pretty much outline what you might want to do in terms of a series.

Scott Benner 8:50
Oh, I'll talk to her about it. Steven, I have other people jumping in. Now, this didn't occur to me that other people will do it. I'm going to see what I got here. Hold on, a second. So we've got, oh, I like these people. Hold on. We're gonna let Stacy in. I don't know how many people voices I can do before this will become confusing, but Stacy, yes, sir. Hey, Steven jumped in already. But, uh, so you're here with Steven and I. But how are you? I'm good. How are you, I'm good. Do you want to, like, record an actual, like episode, or you just want to say hi? Oh, I don't care. You don't care.

Stacey 9:23
I would like to record an episode eventually. Yeah. Well, so today's good, or another day is good. What do you want

Scott Benner 9:29
to talk about? We'll kick Steven right out of here. Don't you worry. No, what do you want to talk about?

Stacey 9:35
No, Steven, anything and everything. I've, well, I've had diabetes for almost 30 years. So I've been in and out of everything, anything from diabolimia to addiction and alcohol. My sister was diabetic and she passed away when she was 30. I mean, just, there's all sorts of things we could talk

Scott Benner 9:56
about. Wow, that's something. Do you really feel like? Ready to do this now? Or. Would you like to just get on the schedule and get set up? I don't care. I'm up for anything really. All right, yes, hold on a second, because I think I'm gonna get you on the schedule. Let me, let me, let Nicole, and also let me, let me go to Facebook and like kill this post. Hold on a second. All right, hey, to make sure nobody else jumps in, Nicole, how are you I'm good. How are you good? Steven and Stacy are here, and I'm going back to Facebook to delete this post so more people don't show up. Hold on one second, I have to say. So Stacy jumped in with some really good ideas for an episode. I think I'm just going to set her up in a on a schedule so she can come on and really get a get a good all right. Hold on deleting this here. Good. Thank God, still a good after dark. Yeah. Oh no. Well, I mean, as soon as you started talking, I was like, well, Stacy has an after dark. Has an after dark for sure. Oh, yeah, hold on a second. We'll get you, uh, we'll get you all set up. When do you want to do it?

Stacey 10:49
I'm available whenever. I'm my own boss. I'm a cat sitter.

Nicole 10:53
So,

Scott Benner 10:54
yeah, well, I'll tell you what I could do. Would you be up for the 25th of July, I would love to Okay, so I'm gonna send you a link. I'll do it right now. Can I just drop it in here and you can go over to the 25th of July and grab up a time that works for you? Beautiful, awesome. How long have you been in the group? Probably, like, two years now, maybe Awesome. Yeah, have we ever spoken before? No, sir, no. Okay, hold on a second. No, here's the link. Perfect. Got it? You're gonna see other availability, but definitely just do July 25 Okay, cool, awesome. Okay, all right. Hey, Nicole, what's going on? Hey, how are you? I'm good. Thanks. I see you all the time online. I try. Yeah, it's nice to speak with Speaker knowledge that you think it's in there. It is. It's

Nicole 11:49
just timing, you know, like timing for insulin, but it's timing when you need what you need, you go seek that knowledge. Okay, it's there.

Scott Benner 12:00
So whenever you have a question, you go to that Facebook group and you get an answer

Unknown Speaker 12:03
for the most

Nicole 12:04
part. Like, this morning, I keep hearing people say, go back to the pro tips. So I've scrolled them. And this morning I listened to the first one, if you're new, or restarting, and it triggered some things with me,

Scott Benner 12:18
really. So you've heard them before. And how long have you had diabetes? Two years, two years, Steven, how long have you had diabetes?

Stephen 12:28
55 and a few weeks. And yes, the time I listened to one, I actually learned something too.

Scott Benner 12:35
Not crazy, why? But like, Nicole Steven, like, why is that perspective? So your perspective keeps changing, and then you hear something again. It strikes you differently.

Stephen 12:45
It's listening to other perspectives that open the little thought, or the door that says, hey, maybe you know, and something like that, yeah, either that or it has me screaming something at the podcast, saying, No, this is how you

Scott Benner 12:58
do it. Oh, yeah. Well, I can't be right about everything. I can vouch for that. So Nicole just two years as a type one.

Nicole 13:07
Yes, I'm the the new early diagnosed person. I had breast cancer, and I believe Keytruda triggered my pancreas to attack itself. That's an immunotherapy for cancers, a bunch of different cancers. Anyway, yeah, so I think that's how I got here. Okay,

Scott Benner 13:29
so you don't have it, it's not in your family at all. You can manage diabetes confidently with the powerfully simple Dexcom g7 dexcom.com/juicebox, the Dexcom g7 is the CGM that my daughter is wearing. The g7 is a simple CGM system that delivers real time glucose numbers to your smartphone or smart watch. The g7 is made for all types of diabetes, type one and type two, but also people experiencing gestational diabetes, the Dexcom g7 can help you spend more time in range, which is proven to lower a 1c The more time you spend in range, the better and healthier you feel. And with the Dexcom clarity app, you can track your glucose trends, and the app will also provide you with a projected a 1c in as little as two weeks, if you're looking for clarity around your diabetes, you're looking for Dexcom, dexcom.com/juicebox when you use my link, you're supporting the podcast dexcom.com/juicebox head over there. Now. This episode is sponsored by tandem Diabetes Care, and today I'm going to tell you about tandems, newest pump and algorithm, the tandem mobi system with control iq plus technology features auto Bolus, which can cover missed meal boluses and help prevent hyperglycemia. It has a dedicated sleep activity setting and is controlled from your personal iPhone. Tandem will help you to check your benefits today through my. Link, tandem diabetes.com/juicebox, this is going to help you to get started with tandem, smallest pump yet that's powered by its best algorithm ever control IQ. Plus technology helps to keep blood sugars in range by predicting glucose levels 30 minutes ahead, and it adjusts insulin accordingly. You can wear the tandem Moby in a number of ways, wear it on body with a patch like adhesive sleeve that is sold separately. Clip it discreetly to your clothing, or slip it into your pocket head. Now to my link, tandem diabetes.com/juicebox, to check out your benefits and get started today,

Nicole 15:38
I don't think so. I might have had a grandmother, a great grandmother, who may have had some issues, but again, this was like back in the early 70s, and either she wasn't diagnosed or she didn't know, and she was elderly at the time.

Scott Benner 15:54
Yeah, who knows? How about you? Stacy, how long have you had it? I've had it for almost 30 years. Wow. And how old are you now? I am 39 Oh, you were little. I'm a little one. Yeah, even 55 years. How old were you?

Stephen 16:08
I was 17, and I got out of Vietnam.

Scott Benner 16:12
Wow. Do you think? Do you ever think about trauma? Like you hear people talking about that a lot lately, like I had a traumatic event, then I was diagnosed afterwards.

Stephen 16:20
Mine can only be aligned with I had several months of low blood sugars post meals, so things were not working right ahead of time. And I've heard a lot of people describe that, especially in the mid teens and 20s, yeah, and that that was an additional symptom they don't talk about, and then got a fever that was like 106 for half a day, and then that, from then on, everything went wrong,

Scott Benner 16:42
just like that. Nicole, how long did it take you? What was the breast cancer like from diagnosis to completion? How long is that? That time

Nicole 16:51
I was diagnosed in October of 22 I started chemo in November of 22 and I ended my last one in April, April or May of 23

Scott Benner 17:04
okay? And they remove your breast. Uh, yes, okay.

Nicole 17:08
So then that happened in August, I believe of 23

Scott Benner 17:13
I see, did you opt for an implant? Or did you just not?

Nicole 17:19
I went for the implant. Either they have other surgeries, but they are very extensive, removing belly fat, which I have none, or fat from other areas, and, you know, reconstructing breasts, but that's like a 12 hour surgery, and a recovery is harsh. Wow,

Scott Benner 17:36
gosh. Are you cancer free? Or how do they think? How do they talk about that? Yes, you are.

Nicole 17:43
I was found what they call no evidence of disease in May. So I did in chemo in April, but in May, I went for a PET scan, and then they found no disease, and then they confirmed that in August with the samples when they removed the breast tissue,

Scott Benner 18:00
congratulations. Thank you. That's wonderful. How much does that shift your perspective on life?

Nicole 18:06
I think I was strong already, and so I took it on, head on, full on, with the confidence that I was going to be successful in the end. Okay, so I think it depends, because like your group, there are other Facebook groups for survivors and women going through breast cancer, and there are all levels of, you know, despair and distraught, and the chemo, how harsh it is, and some people take it well, and some people just don't,

Scott Benner 18:39
yeah, so then, after you went through All that, how long was it before you got type one? When I

Nicole 18:44
went for my labs in May, my

Scott Benner 18:47
blood sugar was 424, right? And April, you finished. So just right away,

Nicole 18:51
right to it, right to it, they diagnosed me as a type two.

Scott Benner 18:55
A slap in the face or like, did you feel like, oh my god, there's another thing. I

Nicole 18:59
felt like, Yes, oh my god, there's another thing, because right before that, my thyroid went out of whack.

Scott Benner 19:05
Oh, geez. And that's how long ago now? No, it's about two years, am I right? Yeah, okay,

Nicole 19:11
the thyroid went first. So the thyroid kind of petered out. I would say in February of 23 maybe March of 23

Scott Benner 19:20
Nicole, you want to get on the podcast too, and, like, do a like, a proper episode, sure. Okay, we'll get that set up too. And Steven, I see your note here, and you are going to be happy to know that as soon as I get back from friends for life. Tandem, I are putting together a Pro Tip series for control IQ, like the one we did for Omnipod five.

Stephen 19:41
That'd be great. I just we need to add some stuff in there that they don't say, though, and that is the way that the algorithm works. They don't want to tell you. And the people the push for doing things in the algorithm and setting it up and not prioritizing basal testing is a big, big, big, big mistake by tandem,

Scott Benner 19:59
okay? Okay, so what I'm going to do is, when the time comes, so I've already, oh, this is probably boring, but, like, I've already, like, agreed to do this with them. We have, like, a, not, we've agreed to do it. So it's happening. That's great. Yeah, I'll go out to the audience and get everybody's questions. And so when that happens, make sure you you throw your thoughts in there. Then I'll collect them, while I'll go back to them. We'll put together a, you know, a flow for a conversation, and then, yeah, then we're gonna do, I

Stephen 20:25
kind of ended up being kind of an expert on several podcast, podcast group meetings and zoom meetings. When I'm there, they say, not there, they save questions, and then when they come on, they give me questions. Okay, good, or I get them. So

Scott Benner 20:41
I know it pretty well. All right, awesome. I'll be able to ask them directly then and make them, you know, make them, or have them talk about it. All right, so, Stacy, Stacy, you got your link? Yeah, I'm signed up. Awesome. And sir, are we, I can? Are we gonna cry when you and I do this? Or, like, what is your story? Like? Super sad. Your internet's a little shaky, so we're gonna have to figure that out before we get back and recording. Okay, yeah, are you, um, at home now? I'm at home now, yeah. So I don't know if you're on Wi Fi or you're wired. I'm not sure, but you jump, you your voice leaves while you're talking. So we'll figure that out. Okay, you know what I mean? Like, do you have a wired computer at home? One that's directly

Stacey 21:25
No, I'm so non technical. I have an iPhone 12 that I'm using right now with wired Apple earbuds, they

Scott Benner 21:34
sound fine. It's nothing wrong with the way it sounds, just that you kind of come and go. So we'll probably

Stacey 21:39
okay. I could go to where, like, I have Wi Fi when we when we do record awesome,

Scott Benner 21:44
that'd be perfect. That's great. Let's do that for sure, because I feel like I'm going to hear a number of different twists and turns in your story. I want to be able to dig into it really well, yeah, yeah, Nicole. I think we're gonna have to do the same thing like, so what do you have? Are you able to record? Nicole? August 8 or fourth. It's a Monday and a Friday.

Nicole 22:05
Fridays are better. Okay, so right now, I don't have anything on my Work calendar, and what time were you thinking?

Scott Benner 22:14
It doesn't you can choose the time. There's a link in the chat here, and if you click that and go to August 8, you can take whatever times that you want. Okay, all right, yep, awesome. Okay, all right. What else should we talk about? I like, this is

Unknown Speaker 22:29
nice,

Nicole 22:31
ninja level stuff. I feel like, I feel like my timing is off, and pre labor Bolus, I'm working on with some foods. I know you're gonna come up with the episodes of the food things and how to Bolus for them.

Scott Benner 22:46
Yeah, I can't wait to see how that goes. So Jenny and I are gonna start that on Friday where we're just gonna take one, like, one specific food and just talk about it, like, straight through, and just do it over and over again with a bunch of different foods. They'll probably end up being shorter, like, you know, probably 10 minute conversations around that idea. That's one of the two things that people ask for all the time. Like, can you tell me how to Bolus for this specifically? And obviously, I don't think we can tell people exactly how to Bolus for something, but we can tell them the things they should be thinking about and break down that item. And the other thing they always want is, like, reading graphs. But I don't know how to do

Nicole 23:18
that without video. That was my question. I'm like, Scott, yeah, you're

Scott Benner 23:22
not the only one. Trust me, people send a lot of it's like, can you do episodes about reading graphs? And I'm like, we don't need to see the graph while we're talking about it, though. And that's the one thing I kind of can't figure out.

Nicole 23:34
So can you take anybody's graph? Yeah,

Scott Benner 23:37
then how do the how does the listening audience see the graph. That's that's the problem. Like, that's the thing I have to figure out. And right now, the podcast apps, they don't, they don't allow me to, like, send you, like, a singular image in that and then to say something, like, it's on a link and you can go look at it right now. Like, I don't know if people would really do that, or if I'm not sure, I guess, but it's on my list. So unless Jenny and I get old and give up or something like that, we'll probably get to it eventually. I just don't really know how to do it yet.

Stephen 24:11
There's not that many different kinds of graphs. We come up with special names for them, like the roller coaster and the Dippy, you know?

Scott Benner 24:20
Yeah, oh, I see what you're saying. So you go from an Upsy into an Upsy, yeah? You could talk

Stephen 24:26
about if the Dippy sharp and the Dippy comes back up quick, you know it, yeah, things like that.

Stacey 24:33
You got cat ears. I bake my graphs into a lot of cats

Stephen 24:38
are using an algorithm or a bump with an algorithm.

Stacey 24:41
I'm in, uh, Omnipod five, but I do a lot of bumping.

Scott Benner 24:45
Yeah, you're having to, like, step in and give insulin. Oh, yeah, I

Stacey 24:49
do, but it's only, like, point one unit, point two units at

Scott Benner 24:52
most, and that helps. Yeah, I have to figure they're going to make that thing more aggressive the next time around,

Stephen 24:59
I. Hope don't understand why they don't log the learning is that it seems like if they log the learning and you kind of report, you'd be able to do something. But

Scott Benner 25:06
I don't know why they don't, yeah, I don't understand the back end of any of those first three days are so critical. I mean, I would just have listen. They're longtime sponsors, and I'm a big fan of Omnipod, but at some point you're going to step back and say, you know, what do I hear when people are talking about other systems? People say, like, that's more aggressive. Feels more aggressive to me than this one, or this one does a better job at that than this. Like, you have to think, if you're trying to sell something you you know, you hear it 10 times. You probably think, well, maybe we should make an adjustment. So I don't know. I don't I don't understand the business of it at all. So I don't know what they're doing or what anybody's doing.

Stacey 25:41
They just sent the email saying that g7 will go with the iPhone app. Okay? I'm like, Well, that's about couple years later. They say in a few weeks. So I'm like, maybe in a few months they'll have it.

Scott Benner 25:55
Every company does that, the Android iPhone thing, no one's ever like, to my satisfaction, explain to me why it's one of the other when they launch like, you know, somebody's like, Oh, we're gonna launch first for Android, or we're gonna launch first for when Omnipod said years ago, we're gonna launch first with Android, I thought that doesn't make sense. Don't more people have

Stacey 26:15
iPhones? Yeah, Dexcom did iPhone all the time. And then

Scott Benner 26:19
I was like, and why can't you do both? Is it like? Is it you don't have enough hands to do the coding? Is it like? Is it actual like, resources to get it done? Like? And then you think, well, there must be a reason they chose Android first. Then another company steps up and they go, Hey, we're going to come out, but when we're first out, we're going to be iPhone only. And I was like, That blew my mind, because I was because all the things I wondered about didn't make sense anymore, you know, I was like, I figured, oh, there must be a reason to go with Android first, and then another company. I forget which one it was. I don't know if it was tandem. Maybe, like they came out, like iPhone first, then we'll get to Android. And I was like, What the hell? None of this makes any sense to me, having worked

Stephen 26:53
for a medical equipment company. It's resources and dedicating resources, because the time it takes to write, it takes so long, and the time it takes to test it takes so long, yeah? And then you have to have a clinical group available to do the assessments. Yeah, it does. It does. You're right. Though, the planning just seems to be, you know, let's just get this done and out the door, and then we'll worry about the rest later. It doesn't that doesn't make

Scott Benner 27:15
sense. Yeah. I mean, I want everybody to be safe and everything to be done well. But it is frustrating when you know, five people you don't know from the internet figured it out in a week and a half. They don't have to go through the FDA then and everything, obviously. But yeah, it is still frustrating from your pre like, you know, a few guys are like, Hey, we're gonna take loop and turn it into trio, and then they just did it. And now it's awesome, and it works on Android and iPhone, so it feels like it could be done. But there must be a ton of, like, just, you know, back room or governmental or whatever. Like, the hurdles must be incredible, because you can't think they don't want it, you know, like, because I talked to all the PR people and all the companies, they're not thrilled that they have to lean one way or the other. So I don't know

Stacey 27:56
it dictated what phone I was using, because when Omnipod came out with the Android. I went from iPhone to Android every day. I was like, Man, I hate this Android, but it's, you know, it's not gonna be too long. And then two years later, they did iPhone. Went straight back to iPhone. And when Dexcom came out, that's why I got an iPhone. I went from Android to iPhone. So the diabetes tech dictates, like, what phone I use? Oh, yeah, basically, yeah,

Scott Benner 28:24
we opened the box for Omnipod five, and Arden picked up the controller. She's like, what's this for? And I was like, well, that controls the Omnipod. She goes, my phone does that now. And I was like, right? She was, I don't want to carry two things. And that was sort of it, yeah, that kind of screwed out of the box, you know? Now, obviously that's not the same now, but it was on day one. She was like, I don't want to carry more stuff, right? I'm looking for ways to carry fewer things with me. 30 Stacy, you said 30 years ago when

Stacey 28:52
you were nine. I was nine and fourth grade. Yeah.

Scott Benner 28:56
Okay, so you were regular in mph, yep. Okay, Steven, you were beef and pork, right?

Stephen 29:03
Yeah, beef and pork, regular and NPH, until I told them I didn't want to do it anymore

Scott Benner 29:10
when they argued. And Nicole, you just got like, humog or something like a proper Yes, I see you guys talking in the chat. And Steven asked you, Nicole, if your doctors offered you any help when you were diagnosed with type one, and what did you tell them that they said this has never happened to anybody before.

Nicole 29:28
My oncologist, yes,

Stephen 29:30
there's clinical data on that, though, that amazes me. That just blows my mind.

Scott Benner 29:35
Yeah, that's what I was gonna say, like, that's a labeled event, isn't it? Yeah,

Stephen 29:39
is to monitor the other endocrine systems during that process you're supposed to be doing, yeah, it's

Scott Benner 29:45
Keytruda or Keytruda Nicole. Yes, Keytruda, yep. I think that diabetes is labeled for that it is

Nicole 29:53
now that, now that I have it and I listen to the commercials, but they were checking my. My thyroid, and it was normal one week, and the net next week, it was like eight, yeah, my body just was like, done. Yeah. No kidding. I think the same thing happened with the pancreas. It was just like, done. There was no warning,

Scott Benner 30:18
yeah. Keytruda, an immune checkpoint inhibitor, can cause thyroid dysfunction, including both hyper and hyper thyroidism. Yeah, but I guess it also probably saved your life, right? It does, yeah, jeez, yeah. It's a lot. It's a lot to give. Yeah, heavy. What are you gonna Yeah, I don't know. Like, I've never, I don't want to be in that position. I've never been in that position. But, like, did they say that to you, or did they just say, Hey, we're going to use this drug now? And they didn't say, like, also, what these other things might happen.

Nicole 30:46
I don't think I was told this, all of the specifics, right? The key true to this immunotherapy is a new type of regimen that they give all triple negative breast cancer patient. So it's a certain regimen you get, you know, this drug, this drug, and the key true to periodically, and because they it's not receptor positive, so it's not positive for estrogen or progesterone or anything else. So they have to like it, and they call it aggressive. So they try to throw the big guns at it, yeah? Because there's no aftercare for it, either, like, once you're done with chemo and if you get radiation and a mastectomy or what have you, there's nothing else to give to

Scott Benner 31:34
you. Yeah, that's just that. Jeez, are you married? I am not. No, I was. I was going to say, like, Was this something that you need a lot of support from other people for? Or, and did you have

Nicole 31:46
I had a wonderful support group. My son, at the time, was 15, maybe 14, and then my mom, she doesn't live forever, but she came to stay with us for some time. And then at a group of friends, sorority sisters and family who would go to chemo with me each week. I had 12 weeks of weekly and then it progressed to four times at three week intervals. Yeah, before I was done, there was one time I was like, you know, they monitor all your labs. So there was one or two times that I couldn't take the chemo that week because my blood cells were too out of whack or too low. So they have other drugs for that. But I felt supported. It was exhausting, but I felt supported. I felt prepared.

Scott Benner 32:35
I'm glad I almost made you cry actually, when you said your sorority sisters came with you. So let's, let's hold that off till it's just you and I. I don't cry in front of three people. I don't mind doing it one on one, but

Nicole 32:48
and it was hard for me because I'm not the type of person to ask for help. Yeah, right, so maybe that was my part of my life's journey, to be able to ask others for help. Awesome. That's great. Okay? And accept it all right.

Scott Benner 33:03
Well, let's not waste this all here. Nicole, we're gonna we have you book. Stacy, we got to figure out what we're going to call yours after dark. What do you think is going to be called?

Stacey 33:10
Oh, God. You Ever Wanted to talk to a pot head while they are smoking? You can do that with me. Gonna

Scott Benner 33:15
do it while you're Am I gonna have to get weed and do it with you so that we can do it together. That would be really fun. Yeah, I don't know. I gotta save that for season 15. Maybe, actually, you said, oh god. I thought, is that what it called after dark? Oh, god,

Stacey 33:30
Oh, baby.

Scott Benner 33:32
All right, Steven, you were on episode 828,

Stephen 33:36
yeah, were you on another one or no, I don't have another one. No, just that one, okay, yeah, no, I don't know. It's just, I've just talked to you so many times. I've given you so many names and that people that have come on. And then, you know, I look back, and then I go, I feel like I've been on it more than once because of all the people that I sent that have got on,

Scott Benner 33:56
yeah. Plus, we talk sometimes, like, you know, outside of this. So I thought this was really nice. I appreciate you guys doing this. I was nice meeting you, Nicole, and you stay C in person like this. And I'm excited to record with you guys, and I appreciate you jumping on and doing this with me. I was set up with Caitlin. She's a returning guest. She was on like, five years ago, and she pops on, and it took forever for her Internet to connect. And I was like, what's happening? And she finally gets on. I'm like, Are you on? Like, okay, are you in a crater on the moon? Like, where are you exactly? And there was, like, 54321, I'm on vacation. And then I was like, oh, so I tried again, and I asked her a question, and there's five seconds, and then she answers me, and I'm like, Okay, listen, Caitlin. I'm like, this isn't gonna work. I was like, I think you have bad internet. She goes, Yeah, this house sucks, and there's so many people on the Wi Fi. And I was like, Okay. I'm like, why don't we do it next week? And she's like, okay. Then I got done and I sat here, and I was like, I was all ready to talk to somebody.

Nicole 34:59
And. Look, look how every PE everybody showed up. It

Scott Benner 35:03
was really lovely, yeah, like, because there is that thing, you know, like, you I popped on and I, I have this, I don't know what you would call it. I don't think it's imposter syndrome, but, like, I'm waiting for the day that I go to the internet and say something, and no one responds, and I feel like I'm going to be like, Oh, okay, it's over. Now. It's like an unfair ability to, just like, reach out into the world and get a lot of people to respond like, I take it for granted sometimes, because I'll have a question, I'll be like, oh, I'll just ask. You. Know, I thought that after I put the post up today, I was like, Oh, I hope somebody like, reaches out, but it was lovely to meet all of you. And Steven, of course, talk again. I'm going to put this up as an episode. I hope people enjoy it. I think it shows, I mean, obviously everybody's got different stories, and they're all unique and very interesting, but at the same time, like, everybody's in that Facebook group together with all of these different stories. Like, look at you. Like, 55 years, 30 years, two years, autoimmune cancer, like, all these different ways to diabetes, you get into that group and like, none of that. Like, I feel like that all just sort of melts

Speaker 1 36:02
away. No, we're all just there to help each other. Yeah.

Stephen 36:06
Really is lovely, a name for Nicole's podcast. So when it comes up is, is a double badass? Because you've got two worlds. You become a badass. And

Scott Benner 36:16
it's a lot, yeah, Nicole, you have a really good vibe about you online. I don't know if you're aware of that or not. You come across very measured and thoughtful, but feeling. I don't know many people's names, but I know yours like I know yours because you're you're just, you're very consistent, I guess is the word I'm looking for and and thoughtful and inquisitive at the same time. So I'm here to learn. No, I appreciate it. Like, I've said this 1000 times in the podcast, but I made that Facebook group because people bugged me to do it. I did not want to do that because of, like, you know, what it takes to manage it, and what a headache it can possibly be. I didn't know all the good stuff that was going to come from it. And I'll tell you too. And I said this earlier to Steven, I don't know if we were recording or not, somebody approached me about doing about doing the cruise. I like, behind the scenes, said to them, I'm like, well, we need to wait to get out of it, because if nobody wants to do it, I don't want to be embarrassed. Like, I'm not afraid to say that. Like, I don't want to, I don't want to announce a thing and have two people want to do it like it would, I'd be embarrassed, you know. And the same thing with the Facebook group. I was like, I don't want to start a Facebook group and then have, like, you know, 1000 people in there, and it just never grow. And I know that. I don't know how that sounds exactly, this is me being very transparent, like, I would look at that as a failure, and I don't want that, but I didn't think this was gonna happen, for the love of God. Now, I was like, how did this happen? Like, and it last month, out of nowhere, I don't know what changed in the algorithm. We were adding like 200 people a day for like two weeks. Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 37:56
you just posted that like couple days. Stacy,

Scott Benner 37:59
it's funny. Your internet is so terrible, but I still understood what you were what you were saying. Yeah, so there's an automated Facebook post that goes up every 150 new members. It's like, it welcomes people and it gives them links to stuff, right? Holy crap. Like, it just kept happening. And I was like, I'm like, What's going and I thought, is this gonna keep going? Like, it won't. Like, Facebook will throttle it eventually, or do something. But so I happen to unfairly know, because of how big the group is, somebody in the group put me in touch with a family member who works for meta, and I got to ask some questions about like, you know, there's nothing more frustrating than having 65,000 people say, I'm here. I want to hear about the thing that this person is going to say, and then you post something, and Facebook doesn't show it to them. And so like you're trying to understand, like I was trying to understand, is there a better way to do it, or how do I reach people? And I was lucky enough to get on the phone with this meta employee. She said a couple of things that were stunning to me. One of them was, if you would have called me a year ago, I could have just basically turned a dial and made you more popular. And I was like, what? And she goes, Yeah, we used to have the ability to help friends and family on Facebook. And I was like, seriously crazy. She could have just judged me up 10% and been like, here, I'll make sure more people see your content. And she's like, then we don't have we can't do that anymore. And I was like, Okay. And then she talked about, you know, like, ways to phrase things so that, like, you know, the algorithm is more like, likely to show it to people. But it was just all, like, depressing, you know, like, I'm like, I don't want to do all this. Like, I just want to put up a post about how to Pre-Bolus and the people want to see it, should see it. It just doesn't work that way. Well,

Stephen 39:41
one of the things they added, they added this year, which is interesting, is the auto join. So if you're participating in a an arena, whatever it might be, you get invites and or you get auto joined to groups. And I had not seen that before this year, and that's happening

Scott Benner 39:58
quite a bit, but that. Might be great. Also, the, if I'm in inferring from her, yeah, we'll find out, inferring from her conversation that I had with her, the government switched this last time when the when the President switched this last time, what Facebook is doing switched also. And what she told me was, is, we won't be shadow banning medical information the way we used to, yeah, and she goes, that's probably hurting you too. And she's like, so that'll go away. And I was like, okay, like, I didn't, like, I didn't dig into it. Like, you know, politically with her. I was just like, okay, she just said, like, we were quelling medical information, like, so we're gonna stop doing that. You might see an uptick. And I was like, oh, like, even that. Like, piss. I was like, You mean, I'm out there killing myself putting this content together and, like, I'm putting it up, and you're like, going, no and slapping, like, slapping my digital hand. I'm like, Oh my God. Like, you have no idea how much time and effort goes into that stuff. It's exhausting. So, yeah, anyway, all right, you guys are all fantastic. I appreciate this very much. I'm definitely putting this episode up, and then I'll, I'll talk to you, Stacy, and you Nicole and Steven, I'll see you on the ship in a couple weeks, couple weeks, all right, that's exciting. Yeah, I can't wait. I have to. I'll tell you, like, while the three of us are here, Suzanne comes to me and she says, like, this is what I do for a living. I put these cruises together, and I have type one diabetes, and I'm in your group, and I listen to the podcast, and she goes, I just think, like, people would want to get together with other people with type one, like, let's try this. So I was like, All right, you know, like, can we put the whole thing? It's, there's a lot in the background of it, and it was a little overwhelming to, like, just throw yourself into but I was like, All right, like, I'll just, like, I'll do it. Like, let's do it. And, you know, it picked up steam, and we got enough people there was, you know, it paid for itself. Like, no, I'm not. I literally don't think I'm making five cents, but I don't care about that. Like, it's, it's nice, like everybody's getting together, but I got to talk to people more who were doing it. I think it's one of those things where, because I don't have type one, I just don't understand it enough. And I think this is going to help me understand it more. But people are just so thrilled to meet other people with diabetes.

Stacey 42:05
Yep, a diabetes in the wild, nobody's the best,

Scott Benner 42:08
I swear to you, like, I understand it intellectually. Like, don't get me wrong, but like, I don't understand it, I guess, in my in my heart, the way they do and but to hear them talk about it over and over again, like, I can't wait to get on that ship, because even at some point, Suzanne said, Look, we'll build private time in for you so you can get away from people. And I was like, I'm like, I don't want to do that. I was like, let's let me just talk to everybody. Like, she goes, you're going to get exhausted. I was like, well, then I'll get exhausted. Like, I'd like to have a meaningful conversation with everybody on the ship. Like, I really want to understand why is this so meaningful? That's the information I'd like to come away with when it's over. So hopefully it's

Nicole 42:44
nice to personally know someone else who is going through what you're going through, because maybe you don't get it on the Juicebox podcast, but you may get it from a friend who's going through it, or went through it, or maybe not, and then you entice them to come on to the Facebook group.

Scott Benner 42:59
It's just worth knowing somebody else, like, for reasons like, that'll be your own, you know, in the end. But I mean, I see how important is to people. Like, I said earlier, like I did the, I mean, I didn't do the Facebook group, because I was like, Oh, I'll make a place where people will, you know, all the things that happen there. I was just like, people are asking for it. And I was like, okay, but now I see what it does. I tell people, like, privately all the time. Like, they'll talk to me about, like, oh, the podcast, how it helps people. It's like, I think that Facebook group might be more valuable than the podcast. Like, if you had to, like, pit them against each other, because it reaches people who don't listen to podcasts, and that's a lot of people. Like, you know, I love podcasts, but I don't think most people do. It never really grew outside of where it grew to. So I think that means we've reached all the people in the world who want to put headphones in and listen to somebody talk.

Nicole 43:46
I don't think that's the case, no. And I think people come back, yeah. I don't think they go away forever. I think they come back upon need,

Scott Benner 43:55
yeah, reason, yeah. I hope so. You know, when I first started doing it, and I was like, you know, you just make one a week. That's what people tell you a podcast is when you start. And then eventually someone said to me, like, could you make two? And I was like, I guess, so, you know, and then you make two. And I'm like, All right, then covid came, and people were like, everybody with a podcast slowed down their podcasts at first to covid, and I was right away. I was like, that doesn't make sense to me, but the overwhelming thing I heard from people was like, nobody's gonna be in their car. They're not gonna listen to my podcast. And I thought, nobody's gonna have anything to do. They're gonna want to listen to more of your podcast. Yeah. So I started making more, and then people just kept coming back. And was like, why are they not all five days a week? And I was like, Uh, I don't know. Like, you know? And I said, moreover, like, I was scared it would like put people off, but it doesn't. And then one day it hit me, I'm like, a radio show is not on two days a week. Your radio host gets on in the morning every day, Monday through Friday, and talks for four hours. And it's there if you need it, and maybe you'll take 10 minutes of it, or an hour of it, or Tuesday and Monday. Like. Once I could get over I don't know what it is, I don't think it's ego, but like, you get over yourself, like that feeling of like, when you make something and put it out in the world, you want people to like, to want it the way you meant it, like, you know what I mean? You want them to take every second of it. And once, I was like, that's not always gonna happen, and who cares? Like, it'll always be there for them if they need it, and maybe they'll just find one episode a week that's valuable to them, like, that's great. You know, if I only made one a week, it might take me two months to make something that's interesting to you. But if I throw, you know, if I put this thing up five days a week, you're definitely going to find something that you intersect with, yeah, you

Stephen 45:35
know, you know a person that has some insight on that, that really has a good perspective, is Adam Brown, because he's a therapist now, and so that community part and understanding the reason why it works and what's happening. He we had a discussion in a camp a couple years ago, a year ago, and it was really, you know, insightful in the way he was talking about it. And he has a practice in Erica. Knows him, but he has a practice in and he's also the one that wrote the

Scott Benner 46:02
43 list, yeah, that yeah, that variables list, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Adam's been on. He's awesome. I really like

Stephen 46:10
he's just, he's just a genuine, genuine person.

Scott Benner 46:13
But I mean, even as you're talking about out there, that's how I feel about it now, like somewhere, wherever you are, whether it's with headphones in your ears or online and you want to interact with a person, there's always, and Nicole, you said this at the beginning, like there's always someone there or something there, or content there when you need it. Like it's not up to me to tell you you need it on Mondays at 10am it's going to be there when you need it to be there. Even as I described it to the advertisers, I'm like, Look, you know, there's ads on every one of these days. I'll tell you, like, I'll do my best to randomize them, but you might end up on a day that nobody listens to and not much I can do about that you really are supporting a public good. I mean, that's how I don't want to say, sell it, but that is how I sell it to advertisers. I'm like, Look, I know that the thing I put together helps people, and you know, I need your help doing it. I can't. I mean, look at us. We're 1230 in the afternoon. You know, I got up this morning and I've been working for a couple of hours. I jumped on to record. I'm going to get done. I'm going to work some more. I'm going to jump on a meeting two hours from now to try to, like, learn more about that circle group, so that, hopefully I can put that together in a way that's helpful for other people who aren't on Facebook and don't want to be on Facebook, and then that's it. It's my whole day. If you really want to do this, it has to be someone's job. I mean, Steven probably knows well, Stacy's for 30 years too. But like, there's been a ton of different orgs that have come along and said they're going to help people with type one diabetes. They all come and go, and sometimes it doesn't even matter how much money is behind them. You know, some of them were pretty big, and it just, they still just peter out at some point. And I think they don't have enough touch points. And that's why I'm so thoughtful about putting the podcast out every day, like I think it always needs to be there, because if not, you know, if you all go away for Thanksgiving and then don't come back, then the thing dies. And, you know what I mean, like, I need it to stay alive, even when people don't need it, so that it's there for when, you know, when they come back around again.

Stacey 48:13
Well, I also like that there's no boundaries for you. You're not afraid to talk about anything. Yeah, and there, yeah.

Scott Benner 48:20
Interestingly enough, that confidence comes from the fact that I have so many advertisers. If I just had one advertiser, I would naturally be scared to make them angry. I mean, I said it earlier when we were talking to you, like, I think the Omnipod five algorithm should probably be more aggressive. If Omnipod was the only advertiser, I don't know if I would say that out loud or not. Like, maybe I'd be like, you know, I know that they've got my back. I know the content works like whatever it is I am where I do. I know it works. So that's good. So now we just agree that that's helping people. And then you have to have the backing to do it, the work every day, to do it, and you have to not get bored by it. And I think that's a little bit of me being older and having grown up really broke. I'm not doing this thinking, like, what could I turn this into? Like, how can I ascend to something else? I'm like, I like this. This helps people. I'm good at it. Now, you know what I mean? I want to keep doing this. And I do see a lot of people like, they're so quick. They're trying to ladder climb so quickly, they'll help you along the way. But that's not their focus. My focus is just helping people come out, get a bunch of advertisers. They back my time and the content. I know it sounds probably ridiculous, but that small sip series that doesn't exist if the podcast isn't what it is, because right, Steven, because

Stephen 49:41
it's the influencer thing on the web, or the influencer thing is not what this is. It's, it's a voice for the community, yeah, and that's, that's a rare thing. It is a voice for the community in many, in so many ways. I

Scott Benner 49:53
appreciate you saying that. But that small sip series, those are my ideas about how I took care of Arden filtered through my. Conversations with Jenny about them, then you get her opinions too. We get them blended together. Then she and I keep working together for years. You can hear as we go on, like, we like, I call it all kinds of stuff, right? Like, it's the bowl beginning series, and it says it's all just ask Scott and Jenny. It's ask Scott and Jenny. Like you ask a question, we answer it the best we can, but we've gotten better at like, our conversations are better. They're more succinct. We know what each other's thinking like it gets better and better. And then one day, someone gets online and says to me, the thing that I have to tell you breaks my heart more than thinking like I don't have time to listen to a podcast. And I'm always like, I'm like, I'm killing myself making this thing for you. Just sit down and listen to it. Okay, fair enough. You don't have time. How am I supposed to take all of this conversation over all these years and squish it down so that a Tiktok generation, and then that's where the Facebook community comes in. I go back to the community, and I say, Look, all I said was a sentence you heard in the podcast that really was transformational for you. What were they? And everybody answered back. And then we just collated them all together, and we said, Okay, here's the top 20. You know, one

Stephen 51:04
of the things that's unique, Scott is that when we in the wild, and the rest can speak to this too, but when you're in the wild and you meet somebody, the kind of conversation you have is very similar to the way in which the stuff comes out on the podcast. And it's not always just diabetes. It's a perspective about diabetes. It's the experience. It's well, what do you do when, I mean, it's broad, and that's what I feel nice about when I'm listening, is it sounds like a conversation. I would sit down and ask somebody if I had the time, if I had the time, if we were both diabetics sitting in a quiet place, yeah. And

Scott Benner 51:40
if you could actually even find that person, find that person? And yeah, no, I appreciate that, because I think it's pretty obvious, if you've been listening long enough, I don't have the actual ability to have a more high minded conversation than the one I'm having. I can't talk down to you. I don't have any ability to talk down to you, and I can't talk at you because I'm not an expert. My very first thought about what the podcast would be was I said, Well, I'll talk to other people with type one diabetes, and then I'll be an avatar for the people listening, because I don't really know what I'm talking about, so I'll ask questions. Hopefully they're the questions you would have if you were talking to the person. I'll just act as the proxy between you and that person you don't have contact with that person. That's the thing I have. And like, I don't know everything about type one. I mean, obviously, but I know way more about it today than I did two years ago, and way more about it than I did five years ago. And if it's working for me, then I have to think it's working for the people listening too, for the very reason that a lot of type ones would tell you they don't like me. I think it works because I don't have diabetes. I think it works because I can't, you know what I mean?

Stephen 52:48
Yeah, you're that neutral, that neutral trigger that says, gee, I've wanted to ask this question, but I haven't asked it. And

Scott Benner 52:56
yeah, I don't have any preconceived notions about it. Yeah, because I've seen really well meaning people with type one get, like, really lit up about something. And I from a, from a you step back and go, I don't really understand why they're so upset. But obviously some happened in their life. This is very triggering to them, you know. And so if you when you put that person in charge of the podcast, now suddenly it's not as down the middle as it could be. It's colored with their perspective still. And I can't do that because I don't, I don't have it to do it with, so I don't know. Anyway, it's a lot, a lot of thoughtful talk about a diabetes podcast. I don't think that much effort should be put into it. All right, I'm gonna let you guys go, Stacy and Nicole. I'm super excited to record with you again, Steven. I'll see you soon. Thanks guys. Yeah, you guys are awesome. Thank you. Take care. Everyone. Bye, everybody, bye, bye,

bye. The podcast you just enjoyed was sponsored by tandem diabetes care. Learn more about tandems, newest automated insulin delivery system, tandem Moby, with control iq plus technology at tandem diabetes.com/juicebox. There are links in the show notes and links at Juicebox podcast.com. Dexcom sponsored this episode of The Juicebox podcast. Learn more about the Dexcom g7 at my link, dexcom.com/juicebox, hey, thanks for listening all the way to the end. I really appreciate your loyalty and listenership. Thank you so much for listening. I'll be back very soon with another episode of The Juicebox podcast. Hey, kids, listen up. You've made it to the end of the podcast. You must have enjoyed it. You know what else you might enjoy? The private Facebook group for the Juicebox podcast. I know you're thinking, uh, Facebook, Scott, please. But no. Beautiful group, wonderful people, a fantastic community Juicebox podcast, type one diabetes on Facebook. Of course, if you. Of type two? Are you touched by diabetes in any way? You're absolutely welcome. It's a private group, so you'll have to answer a couple of questions before you come in, but make sure you're not a bot or an evildoer. Then you're on your way. You'll be part of the family. When I created the defining diabetes series, I pictured a dictionary in my mind to help you understand key terms that shape type one diabetes management. Along with Jenny Smith, who, of course, is an experienced diabetes educator, we break down concepts like basal, time and range, insulin on board and much more. This series must have 70 short episodes in it. We have to take the jargon out of the jargon so that you can focus on what really matters, living confidently and staying healthy. You can't do these things if you don't know what they mean. Go get your diabetes defined. Juicebox podcast.com, go up in the menu and click on series. The episode you just heard was professionally edited by wrong way recording. Wrong wayrecording.com.

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