#1544 After Dark: Eating Disorder

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Jodie opens up about T1D, disordered eating, past trauma, and the strange way Scott's book quietly entered her life.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends and welcome back to another episode of The Juicebox Podcast.

Jody 0:15
I'm Jody. I am 41 years old. I live in the Minneapolis area, and I was diagnosed with type one in 2018

Scott Benner 0:26
if you're living with type one diabetes, the after dark collection from the Juicebox Podcast is the only place to hear the stories that no one else talks about, from drugs to depression, self harm, trauma, addiction and so much more. Go to Juicebox podcast.com up in the menu and click on after dark there, you'll see a full list of all of the after dark episodes. Nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your health care plan. A huge thanks to my longest sponsor, Omnipod. Check out the Omnipod five now with my link, omnipod.com/juicebox you may be eligible for a free starter kit, a free Omnipod five starter kit at my link, go check it out. Omnipod.com/juice box. Terms and Conditions apply. Full terms and conditions can be found at omnipod.com/juicebox this episode of The Juicebox Podcast is sponsored by us Med, US med.com/juice box, or call 888-721-1514, get your supplies the same way we do from us. Med,

Jody 1:48
I'm Jody. I am 41 years old. I live in the Minneapolis area, and I was diagnosed with type one in 2018

Scott Benner 1:58
Alright, Jody, we're going to start very strong for me here today, because in the preamble before you were being recorded, when I tell people, like, what they can say, you know, like, you know, don't say people's names unless you're really comfortable with it. You know, try not to give away your geography. I randomly picked Minnesota.

Jody 2:13
I know I was wondering if you just knew I was there. And then before I was recording this morning, I was like, Oh, I wonder if he's gonna know I'm from Minnesota, or everybody will be able to tell from my voice. I don't know if I have a strong accent.

Scott Benner 2:26
Well, apparently my internal monolog knows already, which I don't have an internal monolog my brain knows because I Minnesota is not my go to state for, no offense to Minnesota, it's not my go to state for anything, right? Your football team wears purple. It's cold. There's a lot to go against you. You know,

Jody 2:41
they never win any sports championships or anything. Yeah, no, no,

Scott Benner 2:45
right? I mean, weren't the North Stars good 25 years ago for five seconds?

Jody 2:49
Yeah? Yep. We all love them. Then they leave. Then, yeah. And you know what? The Lakers left too. We used to have the Lakers and yeah, now we're the Timberwolves.

Scott Benner 2:57
Well, if it was like 70 degrees warmer there in the winter people might stay,

Jody 3:01
Yeah, seriously, it gets pretty brutal for a while. No

Scott Benner 3:05
kidding. Are you from there? Like, born and bred? Yep. I

Jody 3:08
grew up in, like, rural Minnesota, about 50 minutes from where I am now, but I escaped there Twin City

Scott Benner 3:15
area. Did you tell me you were 41 did I hear that? Yep, okay, just turned 41 Oh, happy birthday. Thank you, yeah. How old were you when you were diagnosed? So

Jody 3:25
I was diagnosed a week before my birthday, and that was two days, 2018 so you're good at math. Am

Scott Benner 3:33
I seven years ago? Yeah, okay, seven years ago. So that would have made you Oh, geez, 34

Jody 3:40
Yeah, that sounds right, because my son, I have a son, he's almost 10, and he was pretty young when I got diagnosed, three, four, somewhere around there, okay,

Scott Benner 3:48
and the big part of your story, do you feel like happens before your diagnosis?

Jody 3:53
Yeah, a lot of it and it the diagnosis made things pretty complicated. Okay, so

Scott Benner 4:00
tell people what you were struggling with prior to that and when that started, and how long it had been going on.

Jody 4:07
So when I was about 17 or 18 years old, I went on this diet that, you know, my mom won't listen to this because she doesn't know anything about technology, but she told me that when her friends were in high school, they did this apple diet, where they would eat normal and they'd eat an apple for lunch. And so one of my friends and I, we decided to try it just for, you know, kicks. And so nothing really came of that, until I saw myself in pictures from prom, and I noticed that I lost weight, and I liked how it looked. So from there, I started restricting my intake, and I got to a pretty low weight. It didn't take very long, though, until that turned into binging and purging. That was pretty quick.

Scott Benner 4:51
Give me an idea of your like, I'm looking at a photo of you. Are you five? Four ish, oh no, I'm about five eight yo. You're. Tall. Where was your weight in high school? I probably, I

Jody 5:03
know on my, you know, actually, I didn't really weigh myself in high school unless I went to the doctor. We always had a scale at my my parents house, and I know I stepped on it, but I have no idea what my weight was, whereas now I could tell you what my weight was to the 10th, you know, on any given day. So it

Scott Benner 5:20
was just visual for you, like you guys did the apple thing, and then you see a photo, and you say, Oh, I'm it's weird for people to think that you didn't have a lot of photos of yourself when you were younger. But I

Jody 5:29
know, yeah, but, but I do know on my when I turned 18, my driver's license said 135 oh, okay, so I kind of have an idea.

Scott Benner 5:38
And in five eight, that's, I mean, pretty normal, I think so, yeah,

Jody 5:42
I was in sports, so I had a lot of muscle, and I, you know, yeah,

Scott Benner 5:46
so, so in your mind, looking back like you, you didn't have fat to lose in high school.

Jody 5:51
No, no, I say, All right, I had a good I had a good booty, but that's about it, congratulations.

Scott Benner 5:56
Okay, so all this happens. You see the photo, you like it you start, you're restricting your food. How long do you think? Is it months or years, like the binging and the purging to start? So

Jody 6:08
I know that that summer I started restricting to about, you know, 700 calories a day, and then I went to college did this is also when a lot of my alcohol abuse came into play. When I was in my small town. I didn't notice it much, because everyone did it there. We went to bonfires and we partied in fields, and, you know, the cops would come and we'd run and hide in fields, and it was just normal there, yeah, and when I went to college, then it really started more towards Thursday, Friday, Saturday, so it still felt kind of normal. I was blacking out things like that, and the alcohol led me to, you know, I was starving, so I'd come home with my friends at whatever time in the morning, and we'd eat, and I would feel really guilty about that. So I didn't gain weight from that, because then I wouldn't eat till dinner the next day. And then it was over Christmas break, and that I remember the exact time I was standing in my kitchen at my parents house. Nobody was home except my older sister and I, and she caught me. Well, not caught me. She didn't look it that way. I felt caught eating cheddar and sour cream ruffles, and so then I went downstairs, I purged. I drove to go pick up my little sister from dance, and I remember just thinking, that's the solution. Oh, wow,

Scott Benner 7:26
so is the chain of events that you're eating the chips and you don't want to be because you're a person who's restricting their calories so much. Yep, someone sees you doing it, and then that lights up the part of you that you felt guilt like about getting caught, right? And so you would not have purged had somebody not seen you. Do you think that's right?

Jody 7:46
I think that's right. I really don't think I would have okay. Is that a thing

Scott Benner 7:50
you had ever thought of before? Or was it an in the moment, like, I'll just go throw this up. It

Jody 7:54
was really in the moment. Because, you know, I didn't know of eating disorders in high school. I grew up in a small town, nobody, you know, I didn't really know anything about it, so it was all self LED. And the ironic thing is, my sister is only a year older than me. We're best friends. She would never judge me. Yeah,

Scott Benner 8:12
you know, I understand like she didn't actually put that on you. It's the feeling you got just because another person saw you. Yep, wow. Okay, so then, as you're driving to pick up your other sister, it occurs to you I could eat as much as I want and just get rid of it.

Jody 8:27
Yep, oh gosh. How old are you there? I am still 18, because I was on I was at home from my first college winter break. Okay,

Scott Benner 8:36
if you could take a pause for that for a second, can you talk a little more about the drinking culture, yeah, is it everywhere? So,

Jody 8:43
you know, the weird thing is, is, when I went to college, I realized my friends didn't drink a lot like that. And I went to school in Wisconsin, which is a huge drinking state, but I went in La Crosse, which is really close to Minnesota. And, you know, I just realized, like a lot of my friends, they were in extracurriculars, they were in all these clubs where I was in sports. And the ironic thing is, the athletic people were kind of the popular people, but we partied all weekend. You know, people, it was so normal to just get in the car and drive home, because you're in a small town, that's what you did. And all the parents knew about it. You know, it was just kind of hush hush our one time we got busted during volleyball season, and all our coach said was, don't do it. I don't want to hear about it.

Scott Benner 9:29
Yeah? So drinking and driving, absolutely okay, yep, getting obliterated, passing out, all good, as long as you can knock the ball back over the net when we're playing next time. Yeah. I

Jody 9:40
mean, there was a lot of DUIs. I actually had two, and that's what kind of led me to realize this is a problem. My first one, I was coming home from college to go to treatment for my eating disorder, and I, you know, I drank a bunch of vodka on the way home, and I got pulled over, actually, in my hometown, and I blew the preliminary breathalyzer. Was point two, five. Gosh, wow. So, yeah, I did deal with a lot of that. And then Jody, stop

Scott Benner 10:04
for a second. Give me a picture. Here, you have a fifth of vodka in your hand and you're driving home. I cannot

Jody 10:10
remember. I believe, yes, it was in my car, and I don't know if I transferred it to, you know, maybe another container,

Scott Benner 10:17
perhaps, but, yeah, but this seemed I understand. You're a young person driving to go to an eating disorder clinic, which is probably, I'm assuming, incredibly stressful and, you know, but do you remember what you were trying to do with the drinking like, Were you trying to get rid of a feeling go away in your head? Like, yeah,

Jody 10:36
I recognize now that it was the, you know, I had a lot of anxiety that still then, especially in a rural town, it wasn't talked about depression, wasn't talked about anxiety, wasn't talked about trauma, wasn't talked about and I think now looking back, it was the only way I could turn off the physical and mental feelings of anxiety and Depression, right? What kind of trauma? You know, I was in treatment for my eating disorder many times, and I didn't know what was wrong. I was like nothing happened to me. But now, since I've been doing, you know, trauma work and seeing a therapist weekly, it was, you've heard of it, attachment wounds, where I have no memories of my mom. I don't know where she was, there was no connection, and there was a lot of shame at my house. And my grandpa was my best friend, and I was only in third grade when he passed. But I think that was the trigger. And, you know, he was my person, so I really think that was the trigger, and then feeling like I never had a mom.

Scott Benner 11:39
Your mom worked a lot or no,

Jody 11:42
no. See, the odd thing is, she was a stay at home mom.

Scott Benner 11:44
So was she detached, like emotionally, from you or I think so

Jody 11:49
it pretty sure I was not planned, because she got pregnant when my sister was six months, seven months old, yeah, and so I don't think I was planned. It really changed her life. She talked to my older sister about how she was just trapped in the house, couldn't do anything, she had no friends, and I think I was the problem where I really wasn't the problem. I understand she had her own issues, but I think I was the problem so I got a lot taken out on me. Do you think

Scott Benner 12:14
she was angry at you, or do you think she was just like she separated herself emotionally?

Jody 12:19
I think she was angry. I think she was mad that I kind of changed the trajectory of her life.

Scott Benner 12:24
And I know people this has happened to I'm sorry, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, wow. Okay, so you, for whatever reason, you feel like you were an anxious person, very

Jody 12:34
Yeah, and a lot of feelings. And you know, my son's the same way, and now we talk about it, and I tell him it's okay. And when he's having big feelings, I sit by him and just let him feel him, and then we talk about him and how, you know, I really admire him because he feels a lot and talks to me about it, and I couldn't do that when I was younger.

Scott Benner 12:53
Yeah. So the drinking is to kind of quell those feelings. But how do you like look back in hindsight on the eating disorder. What do you think that was a response to this episode is brought to you by Omnipod. Would you ever buy a car without test driving it first? That's a big risk to take on a pretty large investment. You wouldn't do that, right? So why would you do it? When it comes to choosing an insulin pump. Most pumps come with a four year lock in period through the DME channel, and you don't even get to try it first. But not Omnipod five. Omnipod five is available exclusively through the pharmacy, which means it doesn't come with a typical four year DME lock in period. Plus you can get started with a free 30 day trial to be sure it's the right choice for you or your family. My daughter has been wearing an Omnipod every day for 17 years. Are you ready to give Omnipod five a try? Request your free Starter Kit today at my link, omnipod.com/juicebox, Terms and Conditions apply. Eligibility may vary. Full terms and conditions can be found at omnipod.com/juicebox find my link in the show notes of this podcast player, or at Juicebox podcast.com I used to hate ordering my daughter's diabetes supplies. I never had a good experience, and it was frustrating. But it hasn't been that way for a while, actually, for about three years now, because that's how long we've been using us med. Us med.com/juicebox, or call 888-721-1514, US med is the number one distributor for FreeStyle Libre systems nationwide. They are the number one specialty distributor for Omnipod, the number one fastest growing tandem distributor nationwide, the number one rated distributor in Dexcom customer satisfaction surveys. They have served over 1 million people with diabetes since 1996 and they always provide 90 days worth of supplies and fast and free shipping. You. US med carries everything from insulin pumps and diabetes testing supplies to the latest CGM like the libre three and Dexcom g7 they accept Medicare nationwide and over 800 private insurers find out why. US med has an A plus rating with a better business bureau at usmed.com/juicebox, or just call them at 888-721-1514, get started right now, and you'll be getting your supplies the same way we do.

Jody 15:33
Okay, so now I'm able to see that is because it's still active. I'm in a lot of therapy. I'm making strides, but I think the restricting makes me feel, let's see, probably safer. You know, it doesn't make you safer, but I feel safer. I don't have to feel feelings. I can focus on that, because I know when I eat a little bit more than I want, I just almost panic, and there's a lot of shame, and I don't know what to do, and my head starts spinning. The binging, I think, silences everything, like, just makes me numb. And then the purging, I think, releases all these feelings, like, it just gets them all

Scott Benner 16:11
out. Okay, wow. How long did it take you to figure that out?

Jody 16:15
You know, I had therapists over the years, and now I really have, like, my dream team. They're solid, and I trust them all. And I think really, it started during COVID Because I was furloughed. I took a furlough because I actually made more money. I was in child care at the time, and I started doing more therapy just over zoom. And I think that's when it really I started putting it together

Scott Benner 16:35
five years ago, maybe, yeah, okay. And so prior to that, you were, you lived like this for 20 years. Maybe? Yeah, I was just

Jody 16:43
like, I don't know what's wrong with me. What do I do? This is just a control thing. I need to just figure this out. Oh,

Scott Benner 16:48
you just thought you had to figure out how to stop yourself from doing it. Yeah, I see the process, the binging and the purging that process. Do you think it did it give you, like, something to do, like a hot like, I don't want to call it a hobby, but like the enemy, did it give you a focus? Give you a focus? Like another thing you don't need to distract yourself? Yeah, I noticed

Jody 17:06
I'm a very busy person. I have trouble sitting still. That was how my mom was. I still go home, and I feel very anxious around her. She's always kind of hovering. And when we were younger, you know, we'd go to volleyball practice for five hours in the summer before the season started, and we'd get home and my mom would be like, Why are you guys sitting on the couch? I'll give you something to do. So I'm pretty busy. And I realized when all my things are done and I have nothing to do, I don't know how to just be. I don't know how to sit and watch a show. I don't know how to do a puzzle. I don't know, you know how to just be at my house, yeah? And so I think, and that's, you know, I think that's what it was

Scott Benner 17:47
talking to me more. She was always hovering. What does that mean? Yeah,

Jody 17:51
it was so our couch, our back was to the kitchen, and she was always in the kitchen doing stuff. Who knows what she was doing. But it just always felt like she was there and watching and shaming us. And you know, if there was something sticky on the cupboard, she wouldn't wipe it up, or say, Hey, can someone come wipe this up? Who was ever in the kitchen? She would be like, well, the kitchen is sticky, and nobody ever cleans up after themselves, and they just expect me to. And, you know, so it's always just, that's how she communicated.

Scott Benner 18:18
Okay, I've had those thoughts. I just want to say, Yeah,

Jody 18:22
I know same. And you have to take a deep breath and try not to say him, my son is a disaster.

Scott Benner 18:29
How many kids do you have? Just one? Just one. Okay. Are you married? Not married? No,

Jody 18:34
I'm single. His dad and I actually split up when I when he was about three months old, and that was for the better. We co parent much better. We were together for four years, and we weren't happy. So I actually didn't find out I was pregnant till 21 weeks, but I took pregnancy tests and I was on birth control, so that's really strange. You

Scott Benner 18:56
were over five months pregnant when you found out you were pregnant, yeah, and

Jody 19:00
you know, I was sick at the time with my eating disorder, and so that, you know, that was shock. But when they said, you're about 21 weeks, I knew exactly the date in August when we made him and it was, you know, so it was like I knew, or no, it was July. I knew exactly when it happened. That's how infrequent we are. Intimate. I see

Scott Benner 19:22
okay, yep, lots of fun, yep. What does being in the middle of an active eating disorder due to a pregnancy

Jody 19:29
I was actually I had been in treatment, and I was discharged, and my team, they really acted quick, and they put me inpatient because I was still active in my eating disorder, not as bad, but still struggling. And I was put in patient. They let me discharge and see how I did, and I did not do well. So then the last two months of my pregnancy, I think I yeah, probably two months I was inpatient and then residential, just to keep me safe, because I didn't have much time to plan and wrap my head around this.

Scott Benner 19:59
Yes, oh no, obviously. But I'm saying like, for nutrition and for the baby and for you, like, how do you manage that? It was

Jody 20:06
tough. Inpatient definitely helped. I went on vacation when I was pregnant, and I remember tracking and eating 1200 calories a day, and I really thought that these people were trying to make me fat, like they would add supplements like ensure plus and things like that, because I didn't have diabetes at the time. And I was just like, I really thought this was wrong. And I was trying to convince them how this was wrong. And

Scott Benner 20:27
so how 1200 calories while you were pregnant was way too much, yeah,

Jody 20:31
like I thought, or I thought it was enough, I was like, that's enough. So when I went into treatment and I was eating, you know, like 3000 or so, I was like, This is wrong. I don't know why you're making me eat this much. And I was trying to convince them why it's too much. And I actually much, and I actually was like, I'm gaining too much weight. And they they're like, Well, you're in the last two months of your pregnancy. You're supposed to be and I was like, No, that's not right. I'm not it's too much.

Scott Benner 20:53
The baby came out. Okay. Things were the way you expected. Yep. He

Jody 20:58
was born four days before his due date a lanky little guy. His dad's six five, so he was really long, but he was 615 six pounds, 15 ounces. So yeah, okay, he was a skinny little thing, but he punched

Scott Benner 21:10
up pretty quick. And then how do you feel about yourself after, like, in your postpartum? Like, did it really hit you hard? I guess is my question. I tried

Jody 21:18
really hard. I did work really hard at it, and I did relapse. Though,

Scott Benner 21:22
how long did you make it going like, Oh, I'll keep eating like this. I'll take care of this slowly. I'll stay healthy. Like, how long did that last before you were back to the

Jody 21:30
cycle? Probably, probably a month only. Okay,

Scott Benner 21:35
what was it like that month? What's the voice in your head telling you during that month that

Jody 21:39
he is absolutely worth it? I have to eat, to breastfeed, I have to drink a lot of water to breastfeed. I want a good relationship. I want him to have a different mom than I had. And so I did try really hard. It just, it just didn't stick. I wasn't working on the trauma yet. So it was now that I've started working on the trauma, I'm making strides. I always thought like a different setting would help, a different situation would help, planning out my meals would help, keeping busy would work. But really, now I realize you work on the trauma and then those things come,

Scott Benner 22:10
yeah, it's a symptom of a different problem, right? Exactly,

Jody 22:14
and I'm, I'm glad you know that, because a lot of people don't understand that well.

Scott Benner 22:18
I mean, it makes sense, yeah. I mean, I don't know this is very simple, right? Like, if your roof is leaking, you can't just keep mopping the floor and think this is going to take care of it, right? Yeah? So, yes, I don't know that just seems simple to me. Yep. I think because it's unseen by some or misunderstood by others, like who don't have problems that they grew up with, or don't see the ones that they had, you know, or whatever, were people who were just very happy to say, like, no. Like, this is how it's supposed to be. Yeah,

Jody 22:47
you know, one other thing I didn't mention is the message I got when I was a child and a teenager at home was, you don't matter. Shut your emotions off and get out of the way. And so, I think my eating disorder, it shrunk me. It made me feel small. It made me feel like it was better to be small and shrink. And who you know,

Scott Benner 23:09
yeah, so How old are you? Or what year is it when you're like, 15, for example,

Jody 23:14
let's see, it would have been, Oh, God. Why can't I do this? What is 15/9? Ninth grade. What year were you born? 84 so ninth grade I was, it was 1999 Wow.

Scott Benner 23:25
See, I'm so old Jody. I just want to say that when I've now had an opportunity to live through a decade, another decade, another decade. And it's interesting to hear people say, because I used to say, like, when I grew up, this is how it was, right? Yep. And I was born in the early 70s. I, you know, I was brought up through the early 70s, the early 80s. If you would have told me that my opinion didn't matter, I would say, No, that is 100% right. Nobody was looking to talk to me, yeah. But I don't think it has as much to do with the time as I felt like it did then, because that's me saying, like, Oh, this is my world. This is what the world's like, but it's the world I grew up in, right? There were people who talked to their kids in the 70s, Oh yeah, absolutely. I mean, and in the 80s, and in the 90s and etc. And like, I was thinking to say, Oh, sure, back then, but then I realized you're not my age. Your back then is not the same as my back then, but it doesn't that's not really what we should be talking about. Like, you know, listen, I we don't like lay stuff on our kids all the time, but they have a reasonable understanding of how I grew up.

Jody 24:34
And my cousin so my mom's sister, she's sort of like my pseudo mom. For me, I connect with her really well. And, you know, her daughter and her they have such a great relationship. And it's, you know, I compare them, and I'm like, I wonder what happened? Because my mom was super close with her mom. Who knows, I doubt they talked about things like that, but I, a lot of my friends had such close relationships with their parents.

Scott Benner 24:55
What was the financial situation of the people you grew up around? Middle class? Okay? Or, like, upper middle class, not broke, not struggling, not two jobs, like that stuff,

Jody 25:05
no, like, my best friend lived across the street. She had a pool, yeah, yeah. I never had to worry about sports or needing money for something, or club sports, having money for that, or travel for sports. You know, we never had

Scott Benner 25:18
to worry about it. Do you think your mom was happy in her marriage. No, you

Jody 25:22
know, I never really saw them be intimate in the sense of like hugging or embracing each other or kissing or holding hands. So no.

Scott Benner 25:30
So maybe she was sad and alone, and yeah, and

Jody 25:33
they're still together. My dad's sort of her caretaker, and, you know, make sure she's happy. And my dad was really involved. He coached our sports. He played catch with us outside, you know. So he was really involved.

Scott Benner 25:43
Did you notice their relationship change when he got older? I guess what I'm asking is, like when his testosterone went down, did he get nicer?

Jody 25:51
No, he's always very kind, and my brothers just like him. He Oh, your

Scott Benner 25:55
dad's the kind one, yep. Do you think their distance was your mom's doing? Yes, yes, absolutely. Oh, I see, okay. Oh, I'm sorry, the whole thing. Aren't people interesting?

Jody 26:07
Yes, oh my gosh, yeah, they are very interesting. I mean, I

Scott Benner 26:11
don't know if it's a big secret to me, the whole podcast is about that. Like, I just think everything that you expect out of your life is not nearly what you usually get. No, not at all. It's so bizarre to think that, like, a kind guy would get stuck with a cold girl, or right, or vice versa. But the truth is is, like, I don't think it works the other way. Like, I know people who are like, in their head, like, I think of myself as, like, artsy in my head, I'm not actually outwardly artistic. I can't right. Like, you know what I mean, like, paint or draw or anything like that. But I have kind of, like, an artist mind. And I know other people that are like that, and my wife is definitely not. I look at those other people, and I think if I married that girl, we'd be destitute, like, we'd be in a hole somewhere going like, I wonder, I wonder if we can crawl out today and eat a worm, right? We'd have nothing going on, we wouldn't have, like, we wouldn't have anything together, and there's no balance. I'm very happy to tell you, though, like my wife and I balance each other out in a really, like, lovely way. But there are always things that just don't, I mean, just sometimes they're little things, but it's just she's not wired like that, or I'm not wired like that,

Jody 27:18
right? Yeah, yeah. And you just have to accept that, you know, right?

Scott Benner 27:21
If it's touch and kindness and like, that's hard. Oh yeah, yeah. Oh, so your dad put his energy, that he might have given some to your mom, he think he put it into you guys, yeah,

Jody 27:33
and he, you know, he worked eight to five, he owned a business, and he'd be home at five, and we'd be at home, and he was more active in the community, very active in the community, actually. You know, any boards that there are clubs or, yeah, he was doing that. So he had a lot more extracurriculars on my mom, but when he was home, he was attentive to us.

Scott Benner 27:53
Yeah, hey, did I hear you say have a brother? Yeah, I

Jody 27:56
have an older sister who's like, my best friend, and then I have a younger sister and a younger brother. Does

Scott Benner 28:03
your brother have this? Like, I'm trying to decide if this is a mom and daughter thing, like, Does your brother have these feelings about his life growing up? Or no,

Jody 28:11
I don't know. You know he's kind of, he seems to have a better relationship. And I think there's six years between my sister and I, and then nine years between him and I, and I think they were the babies, and my older sister and my mom have a good relationship, too. I think I was just the scapegoat,

Scott Benner 28:28
and also, like so your mom's got that new energy for your sister, yeah, and then somebody took the piss out of her by the time your brother got there, and she probably couldn't fight back nearly the way she used to, right? And

Jody 28:39
after she had my little sister, she you know, that's when she could have went back to work, because I was six and in school, but then she had my younger sister and younger brother, but then when they were in school, she went to work, and she loved her job, is just at a grocery store, and she loves talking. And she's like, oh my. Everybody loves her because she's really outgoing and she's funny, and she loves chatting with people,

Scott Benner 28:59
yeah? And you're like, that's not the lady I got. Yeah? So she she loved, I think

Jody 29:04
she liked life more than when she was working. She loved going to work.

Scott Benner 29:07
Yeah, did your other sisters get that, mom? Or are you really the only one? I

Jody 29:11
think I got the brunt of it. I know my older sister, she feels like she didn't get what she needed, but I don't think it was to the severity I got it.

Scott Benner 29:23
I don't think any of us get what we need. Actually, like, Oh, I know. I don't think it's anybody's fault. Like, I'm not going to tell you there aren't parents out there that are, like, terrible, like, there are. But you know, above that line of, you know, where people are, like, selling their kids, you know, like, like, above that line where people are getting up every day, taking care of people, going to work, making money, bringing home food, like I don't think anybody is like willfully saying to themselves, Hey, today I'm going to just disregard my children. I think people are trying their hardest in their situation, generally speaking, yeah,

Jody 29:55
and as long, you know, I yell at my son and then I regret it, you know, but I talk. To him, and I say, you know, that was mommy. I should have calmed down. It's okay. It wasn't your fault. I have problems too. Sometimes, you know, Martin

Scott Benner 30:07
told me the other day. She's like, you have plenty of problems. I was like, I know what my problems are. Thank you. I you know, see, you raise your voice, you act crazy, like it's tough, but you got to go back later and say, Hey, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that, you know, I apologize, and I will definitely try harder not to do that next time. Yep, yeah, it's it's just important. Do you think your son feels like his feelings are wanting to be heard by you?

Jody 30:31
Oh, yeah, and he is hurt. I smother him. We snuggle and we're really connected, like on the weekends, we, since I'm a single mom, we have sleepovers, so on Friday and Saturday, we read together in bed, and then I sleep in his bed or and he loves it. He says it's the best part of his night and best part of his day or week. So we're really connected. Awesome.

Scott Benner 30:51
I can't wait for 20 years from now for him to tell somebody on a podcast that you didn't give him what he needed. Mom smothered me exactly. Well, see, you know, it's funny, because I do think that happens. Oh yeah. I think you either get that, like I didn't get or, you know what, they did too much of and you're like, Oh, my God, I

Jody 31:07
know. I know we do our best, right? Exactly. It's hard.

Scott Benner 31:11
Listen, there's a lot of therapists in the world. They need jobs, so we got to keep having kids so those people can work. I have therapy today, actually. Do you really? Yep. Is there a feeling you get when it's over? Is it a lightness? Yeah,

Jody 31:24
and like, a lot of times I don't want to go, and I know that. I think that every week, and I'm gonna go, and then I feel so much better. I actually go to a treatment center. They have all levels of care. I do, and I've been through all their levels, but I go to outpatient and they actually have specialized in diabetes too. Okay, so I see a diabetic educator there every other week, and I do therapy there every week, and it's they're connected. I mean, I have no problem. I said, I live in the Twin Cities, they are connected with the International Diabetes Center. And so, yeah, so they have really great treatment for that. Too, awesome. And that is where I learned what type one diabetes can do with insulin, I

Scott Benner 32:04
bet so. Tell me about first. Is there any other autoimmune in your family besides type one with you?

Jody 32:11
Well, one my mom got diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis, but not until she she ignored it for a long time, but probably when she was about 55 so you know, her joints, you could tell something was wrong. And she started having trouble opening things and limping. And you know, so that is the only other thing that I know of. Your

Scott Benner 32:31
mom didn't have a thyroid problem. No.

Jody 32:32
I mean, well maybe, I bet she's hyper metabolic, because she is tiny and skinny and she can eat as much as she wants, and she does not gain and out. I

Scott Benner 32:43
guess that's not a thing they used to test for, like, right now, right? Stuff, like, when she was younger, like that, right? Brother, other sisters, nobody's got anything going on, nothing. Okay, so how do you figure out you have type one?

Jody 32:56
Okay, before we do that, I have to tell you something so ironic. So, oh, go ahead. I didn't know you're producing. Go ahead, that's fine. No, you're gonna love this. Probably 10 years ago, nine or 10 years ago, I read your book, seriously, yeah, and I did not have type one. I read your book. And then before I was diagnosed with type one, I was on Instagram, just scrolling, and I came across junipers mom. I think it's what is her, I can't think of her Instagram handle, but she was on one of your earliest podcasts. I remember the name, yeah, yeah. Wait, Juniper was diagnosed, I think when she was two, so similar to Arden. And I followed her. She mentioned you, and I listened to her podcast with you, and then I started listening to the podcast.

Scott Benner 33:37
Oh, awesome. But before you had diabetes, yeah? Wait. All right, let's go slower. I wrote a book about being a stay at home dad, I think in like 2013

Jody 33:47
and I probably read it in 2016

Scott Benner 33:50
How did you find a three year old book that was probably out of

Jody 33:53
print? A guy that I was dating just had it at his house. Why the hell did he have it? I have no idea. Well, the world's so weird. Oh, and I just picked it

Scott Benner 34:02
up and read it. Listen, I'm sorry for chastising you about the production of the podcast today, because you're doing a great job. It's a crazy story. So you're dating a guy. Was he a stay at home? Dad,

Jody 34:11
Oh God no. He didn't want kids. He didn't have kids. Nope, so I don't know

Scott Benner 34:16
why he had that. What? No. So a man who did not have children, who didn't want children. Had a book about being a stay at home dad in his house,

Jody 34:23
and it had laundry on the front, right? You were like, covered in laundry. Actually, there's a

Scott Benner 34:27
poster of it right here in front of me. Yep, yeah. It's not me. People wonder, but it's not me holding the laundry, right? You saw that book and he said, I didn't read it, or it's whatever, like, what I loved it, whatever he said. And you're like, I'm gonna read the book. Yeah, I just picked

Jody 34:41
it up and read it. So I, like, it because I like reading, and maybe I didn't have a book. Or, you know, who knows? All right,

Scott Benner 34:46
here's the part. Is this, this is the question I don't want to ask, but did you like

Jody 34:50
it? I did. I remember liking it, and then I didn't know it was you. No, of course, yeah, like, or when I found the podcast, I didn't know it was you, and then it was, I must have heard you talk about. On

Scott Benner 35:00
the podcast that must have freaked you out. I know I

Jody 35:03
was like, What the hell is going on? It was, you know, it was meant to be, I guess. Well,

Scott Benner 35:06
so years later, you're listening to the podcast, you're like, and I say something about that book, and you're like, I read that stupid book.

Jody 35:11
Yes, oh my, and I didn't have type one. Who knows? Also, it's interesting

Scott Benner 35:15
that books, I find it to be very interesting, because people who read it who don't have diabetes in their life. If you later ask them about the diabetes portion of it, they don't really recall it as much. They go, Oh, at the end of the book, his daughter gets diabetes, yep, I don't remember, right? But if you talk to people who have type one and they read it, they think it's a book about diabetes,

Jody 35:34
yeah, really interesting. They're like, Where the hell is it? Yeah,

Scott Benner 35:37
no. I'm like, Oh, it's a book about being a stay at home dad. And at the end, there's a little bit about type one. And they go, No, that's not how I remember. It so interesting. Okay, so that's crazy. I am definitely going to tell my family about this later and watch them Look at me, oh, like you're lying. They're just like, yeah, here's a story about that podcast again. Yeah. Anyway, I think that's awesome. So you, oh my god, so you fried my mind. So let's just go back to the other question, like, how did you figure out you had type one?

Jody 36:07
So I went to just my PCP, and it must have been, it was time for, you know, just my yearly physical, everything. So she drew all my labs. And I was pretty low weight at the time, and, you know, I had an eating disorder, and my a 1c came back. So this was thank God for this woman. My a 1c came back at 7.1 and, you know, they were like, Oh, God, that's weird. Just come back in a week and we'll check it again. And it was 7.9 so they sent me to Endo, and they're like, gosh, you have type two. And you know, my endo was like, I do not think you have type two, but it could just be presenting weird because you're anemic and red blood cell, I have no idea. And so I came back maybe a couple days later, and did the glucose drink, the fasting glucose drink, yeah, and all I, you know, you can't eat or anything, so I had water with me and just black coffee, and my best friend, I texted her, and she had a friend with type one, and I was like, God, I feel so sick from drinking that. But I think, or from I feel so sick right now, it's because I had black coffee with nothing else. And she was like, hmm, I don't know if that's it. And she didn't say anything. And then I met her later for coffee. And it was a Friday, and at about 458 on a Friday, I missed a phone call from Endo. And he is wonderful. He left a message, and he said, You know, I really hate to tell you the your test shows that you have type one. You know, I'm going on vacation for a week. So I'm sorry I can't. And so he hooked me up with everything to

Scott Benner 37:43
talk to, all right? He didn't tell you, wait seven days and we'll get back to this.

Jody 37:47
No, with, I can't remember if I saw an endo or diabetic educator, like I think I, I don't know. Maybe I saw somebody else, you know, instead of him. I can't remember exactly. Wow. And so I left there on only one unit of Lantis. Okay,

Scott Benner 38:03
and what about the shock of just having type one?

Jody 38:07
My got my sister, who I says, my best friend. I just called her balling. And she's like, Jodi, you are in the car. Pull over and she talks. She always talks me off the ledge. She's amazing. So yeah. And then I contacted my doctor, and she's like, oh boy, this you have an eating disorder, and now you have type one. And because of being like I said in the treatment center, I knew you could restrict insulin. Oh, okay,

Scott Benner 38:28
oh yeah, lose weight. You'd seen other people probably do it, because

Jody 38:34
this center, you know, specialized in diabetes. There was a diabetic trap. There

Scott Benner 38:38
was there a part of you it was like, let's go. I got a new way to do this. Or no, no,

Jody 38:43
i Oh, my God. I was so upset. It was awful. Where are you in

Scott Benner 38:49
the process of I don't I never know how to talk about this. Like you're trying to, I don't know what you're trying to do when you have an eating disorder, you're trying to make it go away. You're trying to stay on top of it, like, what's the wording you use for like, your goals?

Jody 39:05
Every day I'm like, I want to do well. Today I'm working on healing, and I do a lot of self talk now, like working with my trauma therapist, it really helps me to, for an example, eat breakfast and kind of panic and not know what to do and want to eat more and then purge and all that. But instead, now I'm talking to myself, and I'm saying, you know, in my head, Jody, it makes sense that this is scary for you. It makes sense that this is really hard. You're not used to doing this, and you got messages that it wasn't okay to treat yourself well, and so, yeah, like, right now, I guess I think of it as for, like, a forward trajectory. I just want to keep improving day by day, and showing up and being honest with my treatment team, following their recommendations. Last time I was inpatient, I did tell my outpatient doctor with the therapist. I don't want you guys to be scared of me anymore, because I think a lot of times. They were scared that if they pushed me too hard, I'd run away. You know, I did kind of a harm reduction approach for a while, and I said, I don't want that anymore. I know I can recover. I don't want the harm reduction approach. I want you to push me and I want to follow your recommendations. Okay,

Scott Benner 40:15
so you're just trying to have positive forward momentum. Yep. That's your goal every day. Yep. Okay, gosh, so when that's your goal, and now you have this new traumatic thing happened to you getting this type one, and you're suddenly have the realization of, like, Oh, I've seen people manipulate their weight with insulin, yeah? Like, that's a lot of new stressors all at one time. Do you backslide from there?

Jody 40:44
So I did. The diabetic cares for a while, and then I was in denial. So I, you know, I didn't have type one. So I told myself I didn't have it. You know, after doing that for about a year, I, you know, the three month a, 1c, check, it was kind of creeping up, and then at one point it was 14.9 and so then I did get into treatment. That's when I really started working. I there was a new diabetic educator that started at the treatment center I was at, and I started working with her, and it's been amazing. And like I said, I see her every other week. And you know, at first we did like the harm reduction approach, and now we don't do that. We do, you know, this is what you got to do. The biggest part, I have learned so much for the podcast. I could be a diabetic educator. Okay, you've taught me so much. And you know, I've listened to everything, like the Pro Tip series, all the stories, everything. So, you know people, they teach a lot, too, just listening to guests on your podcast. So during the day, or when I'm eating, you know, and working hard at doing my best eating, my management's amazing, you know, it's if I go up to 180 I'm pissed. I'm like, What the hell did I do wrong? How did that happen? Where it gets into trouble is, if I'm struggling and say, like, Whatever, I'm gonna eat this. I don't want to treat for it. But the biggest part where that doesn't happen very often, the biggest part is, if I binge and purge, it skyrockets and then it stays high for a while. So what my her name's Gina. She's amazing. I'm gonna I won't give her last name, but her name's Gina, my diabetic educator or diabetic nurse. I'm on Omnipod. So on my custom foods on Omnipod, I have a custom food that's just called the dark place, and I hit it and it gives me a Bolus. And that's our goal right now. You just have to do that. I know you wanna not give any insulin if you're gonna binge and purge, but you have to do that. And so that's what I do.

Scott Benner 42:38
You have to manage the idea that, like, I'm eating and I know I need insulin, but I'm sitting here being honest with myself, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to eat too much and then throw up. Yeah, and it's

Jody 42:50
hard, because each time I go to do it, I'm like, I don't want this insulin. I do this to lose weight. I don't want to give insulin and, like, process the carbs. But one thing that helps me is knowing Okay. Before I got type one and these symptoms were there, my pancreas was doing this job. So it's no different than that.

Scott Benner 43:07
How torturous is all of this? A lot of brain

Jody 43:11
space. It feels like it consumes a lot, and it's hard, because I love seeing my graph a straight line. I love it. And at the same time, then I I worry, because I'm like, you know, there's a lot of pride, and I'm so proud of myself. And then it's scary too, because I'm like, Oh God, I could be losing weight by not doing this. When I see the highs from like, binging and purging, I feel so guilty, and I, you know, not, that anybody shaming me gets more guilt. Of like, I know how to do this. I don't want these high numbers. I want to be healthy. I want to live a long life. When I go into, like, the two hundreds, if I've been to emerge, that's good. It used to be, like, 600 so I'm bringing it down. And I do feel a lot of pride about that. I'm like, okay, it didn't get awful high. Like, still high, but it didn't get awful. And then when I do that, it usually comes back into range. So it might be like 200 for a while, but it comes down and I'm like, That's so much better than, you know, binging and purging at six o'clock at night and it not coming down till three in the morning. Yeah,

Scott Benner 44:12
talk about a little more. What did you call it? It sounds like there's a way to to be attacking this that's just about minimizing damage to you. And there's a way to be attacking this that's focused on moving forward. Like, what did you say? What was the phrase

Jody 44:29
forward trajectory? Sort of, maybe, no, something. Harm Reduction. Harm

Scott Benner 44:33
reduction. So is that a form of treatment that some people take like, is that the therapist saying, Look, I don't think we're ever getting you out of this, but let's try to reduce the harm you do to yourself.

Jody 44:42
Yeah, pretty much. And it was like, you know, harm reduction right now, maybe in the future, you'll be ready. And I guess what that did work with me. But also that didn't come till I found, like, the perfect treatment team for me. I really didn't think I could ever get better, whereas now I'm like, No, I can do this. I can manage my diabetes maze. Mean, I can eat, I can be healthy, I can stop purging. And it's, I know, I firmly believe that I'm getting there with the trauma work I'm doing and being completely honest. I used to, you know, tell one person on my team this amount, one person on my team this amount, but omit certain information, whereas now I'm just honest across the board. And I have a team that's, you know, they're just really proactive. They had a care conference the other day, not as like a threat, which it used to feel like, but as a like, are we all on the same page? Or we're helping her the best we can. Let's get her on board with these. So, yeah, it was give a unit when you binge and purge, whereas now it's like, Nope, we have to keep the numbers down. And that's what I want.

Scott Benner 45:39
Excellent. Can I ask, Do you have any other topics that you work with, with a therapist or a psychiatrist or anything like that? That's a side of this, or is this your thing? Well,

Jody 45:49
I guess, like, you know how we said, like, this is kind of a symptom. The problem, I guess, what I work with psychiatrist is with is, you know, anxiety and depression. But actually, just after Christmas, I was in treatment in the fall, and I stayed longer than usual, because I, you know, I want this foot, and it has helped. There has been forward momentum now, consistently. When I came to I work as a special education para with autistic kids, and I love them. They're amazing. It's hard work, but I love them. When I came back to work after winter break, my schedule changed, and instead of being with the little girl that I was with all day, I was just with her from 10 o'clock on, and I was bouncing around in the morning, and I realized how much that affected me, emotionally and mentally and just stress wise, I was convinced I was dying. I was having heart palpitations, I, you know, all these things. And I actually went to the ER, thinking I was, I was trying to convince my treatment team for a month, I'm dying. This is not okay. You're missing something, and they're like, No, everything's looking okay. And it was panic attacks. So I work with a psychiatrist on that, and I think, since it was validated, this is panic attacks. You are having a hard time. It's like, I instantly Calm down, and I do a lot of deep breathing during the week now. But yeah, so that's kind of what I work with the psychiatrist on. Is just that intense anxiety. And then my trauma therapist actually is a Neurofeedback therapist. Do you know what neurofeedback is? No, it's like biofeedback. So it's, I get all these sensors on my head, and she retrains my brain. I do not know how it works. It is like, I have no idea. She's watching all my brain waves, like the high beta, the low beta, and she's trying to increase this one and decrease this one. And it's wild, but it helps. And I could not tell you how it works at all.

Scott Benner 47:41
Does she ever bring up medication to help with that process? Yeah,

Jody 47:45
I am on medication. And she kind of asks how my psychiatry appointments go. She asks how you know my past week went, and she confers with my therapist every once in a while, and it's all kind of collaborative. And you know when I say, Okay, here's an example how wild this is. So you get these electrodes on and you watch a show, okay, are these sensors? It's not electrodes, sensors, and you watch the show, and she's training your brain, and what you want to happen is you want the screen to be full and you want to be able to see the whole screen. When she's working hard to train your brain, the screen gets smaller and you can't see as much. So your brain is trying to figure out how to see the whole thing. And she said last week that I had a lot of like, high beta, which is the rumination and the stress. And she's like, what happened? I'm like, I have no idea. And then as I was driving home, I realized in the show a song came on. It reminded me of my ex, but then also, there was a DUI crash where somebody was killed. I realized, like, those DUIs I had because of it, the man, his girlfriend left him, and so, like, I had an ex that left me because I had an eating disorder. And so it brought up a lot of that from him. I

Scott Benner 48:55
see do those moments like backsliding with the eating disorder, or

Jody 48:59
no, no, no, it's, it's usually like I realize it, and also neurofeedback, it has opened my brain, like I can think, and it just feels like I have brain space and I'm able to work with my eating disorder symptoms, more like talk myself out of them, realize, oh, this is why I want to do this right now. I don't need to do that right now, I can do something different, so I have more space to process through them. Tell

Scott Benner 49:25
me how the podcast helped you with all this. Like, I mean, like, around insulin, not I mean, if it helped you in other ways, that's great. But like, I'm asking around insulin,

Jody 49:35
so like, the Pro Tip series, I you know, the funny thing is, is, like, I know more because of the podcast than diabetes. Who have had it since they were young. I have learned I love oatmeal like I love it, and I have learned how to keep a straight line when I eat oatmeal cool. I have learned the crush and catch is that

Scott Benner 49:56
it? What I call that crush it and catch it. Yep, I've

Jody 49:59
learned how to do that. But I have learned that for me, when I'm low, half a glucose tablet works. That's all I need. Just little stuff. Yeah, yep, just a little bump. I have learned what is it expect? What you know is gonna happen. Is gonna happen. I

Scott Benner 50:12
love it when people try to mimic back to me this stupid things I've said. I realized the first time I said it, I thought there's gotta be a better way to have said that, but it was kind of too late by then, yeah, learn to expect what you know is going to happen, something like that. Expect, expect that what you know is going to happen is going to happen. Yep, that's what I said. Yeah. I definitely could have said that better just other

Jody 50:34
things, like listening to all the Omnipod episodes. Yeah, you know when I panic that I'm gonna go low, really watching the little like, not staring at my Dexcom, but watching the little dots and see, does it look like it's coming up? Does it look like it's going to keep going down and just like waiting with it, not reacting and treating it and then going high?

Scott Benner 50:54
Can I share with you that I had an experience? This is a long time ago, many, many years ago, but a person who does really terrific work for people with eating disorders said to me that, you know, I have to be careful because, you know, talking to people about how to manage their diabetes like this, like, you're going to cause eating disorders, you're going to like, you're going to like, make people with eating disorders hear that and feel worse and everything. And I don't know, it just I didn't see their perspective at that. I mean, I didn't not understand what they were the bigger picture, what they were trying to say. But I was like, I don't think that sharing with the world how to Pre Bolus for your dinner, right? Should be seen as a thing we don't say out loud, in case someone with an eating disorder hears it and interacts with it poorly. But like, you didn't have any of those problems when you heard all that information. No,

Jody 51:41
I consider why? Why am I having a reaction to this? And that helps also, I really tried, like, the Keto stuff for a while, and I realized that really was not good for my eating disorder. And I know a lot of people do it, and they love it, and I really think that's great for them. I had to unfollow a lot of those people, or just, you know, like, hide them in the podcast group, or if I was following some on Instagram, I had to unfollow them. So

Scott Benner 52:07
is it what they're saying or what they're doing, like, what caused you, like, a weird feeling?

Jody 52:12
I think it's because I'm trying to have a healthy relationship with food. And, like I said, I love oatmeal. I want to be able to eat oatmeal and not feel guilty, or like I'm

Scott Benner 52:22
that simple, like, piece of, yeah, being made to feel ashamed for something because you think you shouldn't be doing it. I

Jody 52:28
have a trip planned this summer, and there's a really great, popular pie shop, or, and then there's, like, a really popular donut shop. Like, I want to be able to get those and not say no, or make keto donuts. Or, you know, I'd like

Scott Benner 52:41
to try a bite of the donut, yes. And without it, like, cascading into like, Oh, you shouldn't have done that. You're doing it wrong. We have a way of doing it. Like, oh, so it's not, it's not so much a person who eats keto or very low carb or something like that. It's just the rules they follow that they're happy with. They don't intersect well with you, right?

Jody 52:59
Yeah. Like, and I already, I'm already I'm already planning it. I'm gonna bring some hard boiled eggs. Eat the donut.

Scott Benner 53:04
It'd be good. Tell people what you're using the egg for. Yep, I got it.

Jody 53:08
Like, I have to have some protein with this donut, or it's not gonna be good, you know?

Scott Benner 53:12
Well, you should put the egg in the hole of the donut. And that will freak people out pretty well,

Jody 53:16
get one of those bacon donuts. Oh, my God, egg in the hole. I don't

Scott Benner 53:20
think I could eat that a donut with bacon. I don't think I've had a donut in a while. Well, I've had one in the last few months.

Jody 53:27
Yeah, I, I don't either I don't have them, really, I have to admit,

Scott Benner 53:31
I ate it. And then I thought, I wish I wouldn't be that, like, there's just like, not wish I just like, there's, I didn't get anything out of it. I was

Jody 53:38
like, Oh, well, sometimes, even if I wasn't diabetic, I feel like I can feel like sugar coursing through my veins. Yeah.

Scott Benner 53:43
I mean, sometimes you look a little jolt isn't bad. I mean, I don't drink coffee even, like, I don't even know what a jolt feels like, so But seriously, like, after, like, losing weight over the last couple of years for me and for, you know, being on a GLP medication. And obviously, if it's obvious, if people are listening, then it's obvious to them. But I don't get the same rush from food. Like, yeah, and so it, and it doesn't, like, taste as exciting as you remember it, like, that kind of stuff, yep.

Jody 54:13
And that's kind of what I'm going for. Like, just like normal, like, not looking forward to eating all day because I'm not letting myself eat. Then, you know, I kind of just want a normal relationship. I actually, you released a pod, an episode this week, or maybe it was last week, and you were like, I just want to go get some shrimp and F and I was like, I have to go get some shrimp. Now, the way

Scott Benner 54:33
you just said it like a normal relationship with food. Like, oddly enough, I think that's what a GLP gave me. Because, yeah, I had, like, after the first bite of the donut, I was like, Oh, that was good. And the second bite, I was like, This is good. And then the third one, I was like, why am I still doing this? Yeah, I got the thing already. Do you know what I mean? Like, like, I got like, Oh, that's sweet. And it had a little crunchy on it. And I was like, that's awesome. I should have thrown the other half of it away, because I'm restricting my. Food, but because I've gotten that experience now, like the rest of it's just, you finishing the donut, if that makes sense,

Jody 55:05
Yep, yeah, right. You're just doing that because it's there, yeah, oh, yeah, exactly. Like,

Scott Benner 55:09
I'm not hungry anymore. The judge is gone. Like, like, yeah, it's now. I'm just like, Yeah,

Jody 55:17
well, and they say people had food noise, like, I don't want food. Noise, that's what I'm working towards, too. So it's sort of like, you know, you have that you have food noise, well, yeah, just with the eating disorder. Like, I'm thinking about food all the time, you know. And, yeah, I kind of want what people say they get with the GLP is just not as much food noise, you know.

Scott Benner 55:32
Listen, let's be clear before I say this out loud. Not a doctor barely went to school. But like, it did make me wonder, like, I wonder if you like micro dose that, like if you could get a little of that without the suppression of your hunger. And I also don't know if that's a thing that would be bad for a person who has an eating disorder. You know what? My treatment

Jody 55:52
team is really open to a lot. And you know, if I mentioned it, they'd be honest with me, and if they thought it was a good thing, they'd talk like Gina would talk to my endo and they, you know, talk about it. They're great. Gina actually mentioned that because I have big fears of going low dosing for binging, like, because I'm gonna purge and get rid of it. I have so many big fears of emotional she actually has started talking to me about maybe a Fraser for that, because then it goes in quick and leaves quick having

Scott Benner 56:22
some of that on hand. Now here's the question, Would having that on hand because it would help you manage your eating disorder better with your insulin? Would it be a great thing, because, oh, I can manage it. Or do you think it would turn into a thing where you're like, well, I could binge and purge more now, because I have the No,

Jody 56:39
I think it would help me manage it. And, you know, then feeling pre like, feeling good about a lower agency,

Scott Benner 56:46
yeah, yeah. I mean, listen, that's a great idea. Then get it on hand.

Jody 56:51
Yeah, I do have a lot of fears. Like, if I keep doing this, I'm not going to live very long. Like, I want to get this so, yeah, it would just help with the like, okay, so I think it'd be tough at first, and then it would become second nature. And hopefully I'm not using symptoms like that very long, but hopefully I would just do it, and then, you know, just become second nature. Okay, if I'm new symptoms, I have to do this, right?

Scott Benner 57:12
Can you tell people why you just said I might not live like tell people how an eating disorder impacts the length of your life. You know, I don't necessarily

Jody 57:19
think the restricting is it has never got me into trouble, like it's dropped my weight, things like that. I've been like, Dizzy here or there, but it's the binging and purging. I mean, you know, at my worst, I was doing it like five times a day, and it's not that bad anymore, but putting that stress on your heart for 20 years, and now with diabetes, and you know, not only the stress on the heart, but now I'm at risk of, you know, heart attack, and, you know, heart disease, and so it's just I can't keep doing this and expect that nothing's going to happen to me, right?

Scott Benner 57:51
It also can, am I making this up? It can also affect, like, the enamel on your teeth, or your esophagus, your throat, like those sorts of things too, right? Your stomach and

Jody 57:59
the, like, my teeth, knock on wood, are okay, right now. I have no idea how, but they are. So yeah, but yeah, it can affect

Scott Benner 58:07
all that. Yeah, in the middle of this story, Jodi, I think you're owed and are happy to take a little bit of luck wherever you can get it. So right, yeah, yes, that's awesome. You talked a little bit about, like, a like, forward thinking doctors. I know this is, like, still in the study stages, and I don't think it's a place. It's not a thing you can just go do yet. But has anybody brought up like Ibogaine to help with your trauma? Because, no, I don't even know what that is. So listen, I'm not the right person to ask about this, oddly enough, so I just wanted to know if somebody but I think that people are using Ibogaine, which, like a neurobiologic, like, you know, I think it's mushrooms,

Jody 58:42
like, honestly, oh no, I, I'm so open to that.

Scott Benner 58:45
Yeah, and they're dosing it, like, in very controlled the stories you're hearing, like, they're not like, everywhere, but I'm, I'm hearing them in a number of different places, right? That people with significant trauma go in, they get, sometimes, one treatment, and they somehow it releases their trauma? Yeah,

Jody 59:02
I'm really open to, like, micro dosing and things like that, and my team has mentioned it. I don't know if I'm right or not, but is it not covered by insurance right now? Oh, I don't know. The last

Scott Benner 59:10
time I heard it like John Hopkins was doing something, a study with it, and I think they're mostly doing it with veterans, like people who have, like, war trauma, yeah, but like, some of the stories I've heard, probably four or five stories from different people, you know, like my husband had clear trauma from, you know, from the war, and he did this, and he just came back a different person.

Jody 59:33
And, yeah, I'm definitely open to, like, any supplemental, alternative therapies, if

Scott Benner 59:39
you're reasonably certain that the eating disorder comes from the trauma, and then to go back to like an hour ago, it feels to me like some days you have two mops in your hand and one up your and some days you only have one mop, right? But the roof is leaking and you're always mopping to some level or

Jody 59:58
another scram. Balloon and frantically trying to put out fires. Yeah, and

Scott Benner 1:00:02
I'm wondering, like, could we crawl up on the roof and stop the roof from leaking, and what would that then do? Like, would you still have an eating disorder? Like, if you're if you could snap your fingers and your trauma, like, and all the impacts from it just disappeared. Like, would the eating disorder disappear with it? Or would you just be a person with an eating disorder and no trauma, no.

Jody 1:00:22
I think if I heal my trauma, I my eating will be, like, I will be a healthy eater. And, yeah, yeah,

Scott Benner 1:00:29
it has to be administered very specifically, and there has to be another medication there in case there's a cardiac event. If there's a cardiac event, like, you can clear it, like, in two seconds with the stuff. But if you don't have the right thing, you don't know which. Don't know what you're looking for anyway, this is not a thing. You shouldn't just be going out to the corner, finding a kid and being like, Hey, I think I'm gonna get rid of my trauma with mushrooms. And apparently it's another, like, situation where it's a very, very low dose. Yeah, there's part of me that's heard enough stories that thinks that if I stay alive long enough, I'm gonna hear more stories where there are clinics where people go and do this, and it's really valuable, right? That's my thought. But I mean, I don't I could be 100% wrong. I also would have told you six months ago that vertex was doing good with putting beta cells in a pouch and implanting it in people, except yesterday, they announced they're not doing that anymore. So I

Jody 1:01:18
know I just saw that on the group, yeah. So,

Scott Benner 1:01:21
I mean, studies like, don't always flourish, and there can be people who do well and people who don't do well. And I do think, in the end, like, if you're gonna see something be widely accepted, it's going to have to widely work, like, nobody's gonna put Ibogaine treatments out into the world if it's helping one in 10 people. But if it's helping more than that, you know, then maybe, yeah, I don't know. Like, it just it's so heartbreaking to listen to you or anybody that talks. I mean, not just you and me or anybody, like, we all have stuff in our life that if you could make it go away, there's just no doubt moving forward would be better and easier. Yeah, you know Exactly.

Jody 1:01:59
Yep, I know. And that's why I'm just glad, like, there's so much more talk around mental health and acceptance towards it.

Scott Benner 1:02:06
I mean, it's, yeah, an obvious thing to talk about. I'll tell you the one thing, this is not the right podcast for it. But you don't have to make a podcast for long to hear that. A lot of people are drinking too much. Oh, yeah. And just that, it's so part of the culture, you know that nobody even notices it, like the I mean, at some point it sounds like you were 17 and blacking out three days in a row. Yeah, yep. I mean, and your parents probably thought everything was good.

Jody 1:02:32
Oh yeah, well, yeah, we'd stumble home. They kind of just swept it under the rug. Yeah,

Scott Benner 1:02:37
it's crazy. Like, to me, it's crazy, but what I'm saying is, I don't think it's crazy to a lot of people,

Jody 1:02:43
you know what? Speaking of drinking quick, I had somebody come out and fix my water heater, and he was a diabetic, and he had on the tea slim, and he's just like, Oh, God, you have Omnipod. You gotta get rid of that. It's so heavy and, you know, it's just, you really got to get rid of that thing. And it was so funny, because he sat there and, man, to me, for seriously, an hour about diabetes, and because I listen to podcast, I didn't say much, but I was like, Yep, I you know. I'm thinking, I know all this. You don't have to whatever. And then I'm thinking, you're wrong. He's like, you know, the T slim, it really, it's really great. It'll keep you in the two hundreds, you know? And I was like, Oh, wow, thanks for telling me. Yeah.

Scott Benner 1:03:17
Well, here's a couple things. The T slim could definitely keep your blood sugar lower than the two hundreds. I know isn't that interesting that, moreover, listen, if he felt like he knew something that could help, like, it's nice that he wants to tell people I understand. Like, if it didn't stop, it gets annoying at some point. But what I hear in that story is that imagine what his life used to be like if a poorly set up insulin pump, keeping his blood sugar in the two hundreds, feels like a major success to him,

Jody 1:03:45
I know. And right now he said that he just talks to a doctor on Zoom every two months or so. And from what I recall, it wasn't an endo. He was managing it through somebody else who was like, sounded like a health influencer or something. And I was like, anything, but you're paying

Scott Benner 1:04:03
for a 220 blood sugar average. Great. Yeah, there's a free podcast over here. Now, does it feel weird? Did you say to him you should try a podcast, or did you just keep it to yourself? No,

Jody 1:04:15
I just kind of said a few things like, Oh, well, I found, you know, this works for me, and I have a pretty busy lifestyle, and so right now I'm going to try the Omnipod, and I'm getting a lot of adhesive issues, and I've tried everything, and I am open to switching to the Moby, or my team is thinking about the eyelet. So just if I keep having the adhesive issues, because I have, like, scars all over my stomach and legs,

Scott Benner 1:04:38
yeah, people who have a reaction to the medical adhesive. It's, it's just another level of sad on top of this thing. I know, yeah, it's, it's tough, but I get what you're saying, like you're involved in a conversation you don't really want to be involved in. You just want your water heater to work, and it's sort of like

Jody 1:04:53
politics, sure. I mean, you're gonna go back and forth and nobody's gonna, like, change each other's mind. Yeah.

Scott Benner 1:04:59
Yeah. Right. Like, that wouldn't have been the time to dig in and try to say, like, Oh no, have you thought of this perspective, right? Yep, not exactly the moment. No. Jody, I really appreciate you doing this. This was awesome. Thank you. You're very open and thoughtful about sharing your story, and I really appreciate it.

Jody 1:05:16
Well, thank you. It's so easy to talk to you. This morning, I was showering and thinking of you. And I was like, it's like, talking to a celebrity.

Scott Benner 1:05:22
Seriously, that's ridiculous, but thank you. It's very nice, yeah, and it's so easy, I would like to say I would. I don't want you people thinking of me when you're in the shower, please. I know that's why I added that. Or do. It doesn't matter to me. I guess it doesn't I don't like, just honestly, like, I'll end with like, we haven't cursed yet, so I don't want to curse and, like, because Rob, by now, is like, editing, and he's like, he's not going to curse. And then I almost did at the very end, but like, it really screws with my head to think that that whole story about the book, like, I wrote a book about something that I didn't see as being about diabetes at all, to be perfectly honest with you, yeah, it somehow ends up with somebody who's not even the target audience for it in any way, shape or form, you intersect with it crazily, read it, and then years later, are listening to a podcast. And, like, I think that's the guy that wrote that book that I found in that guy's apartment one time, like that, right? That stuff is all like crazy. Like, every day it's all connected somehow. I mean, I don't know about all that, but, like, it's nuts, I'll tell you that much. Yeah, you know, like, I just went online to give you an example. Let me see if I can find a reasonable example right now. But at this point, the private Facebook group is doing something like 100 new people a day. It's wild, but you can see where people say, there's intake forms like, How'd you hear about this? I heard about it from a type one parent. I heard about it from Facebook. My grandson has type one. I'm trying to learn more. I heard it from another parent. It's a listing on a podcast. Like, like, I heard from my doctor, my general pre like, these are things that people say every day when they're coming in there. It's crazy. Like, I looked the other day and I was like, number one in like, three countries. I didn't know were countries. I mean, I tell everybody about it, yeah, well, I appreciate that very much. Like, it's just my point wasn't that the podcast is popular. My point is, like, the way information moves around is actually, like, it makes me hopeful and like, I like, maybe we can get to the guy with the water heater. Yeah. You know what I'm saying, exactly, yeah. Like, because it found you in such a sideways way. Like, it would be very cool if it could find more people and just help like, if it helps people, that's really all I want. Yeah, you know what I mean? Like, I'm looking right now, because I'm looking and the Facebook filter, which I have no control over, caught a bunch of posts. And I think it thinks that, anyway, there's six posts here I have to approve. One is about adhesive allergies. One is about what somebody uses to help with that. One is about like a little girl who is having trouble with their CGM. One is somebody saying, I had a rough day. You know, sharing their graph wants to talk about it for this, you know, talking about diabetes being hard for them. Like, here's somebody just has a bleeder on a g6 and they're not sure what to do about it. Like, like, you know, me, like that. There's a place these questions can be, like, asked, and so quickly people will give you a reasonable answer. It's awesome.

Jody 1:08:18
Well, even, like, the CGM, so, I mean, I know diabetes. Who else you know? They see a bleeder, and they're like, I have to take it off, right?

Scott Benner 1:08:28
And it might not be right. Like, so somebody might come to you and say, Hey, listen, that might work. Like, chill for five seconds and see

Jody 1:08:35
yeah right, yep, check it, like, with a finger stick and see if it's accurate. Yeah, yeah.

Scott Benner 1:08:40
Yeah, it's just so much good stuff, like I am so happy that the people find it and that they're finding value in it, and hearing your story just makes me thrilled that it was helpful to you. So thank you very Thank you. I really appreciate it. Hold on one second.

Arden has been getting her diabetes supplies from us med for three years. You can as well us med.com/juicebox, or Paul, 888-721-1514, my thanks to us med for sponsoring this episode and for being longtime sponsors of the Juicebox Podcast. There are links in the show notes and links at Juicebox podcast.com, to us, med and all the sponsors. A huge thanks to my longest sponsor, Omnipod. Check out the Omnipod five now with my link. Omnipod.com/juicebox, you may be eligible for a free starter kit, a free Omnipod five starter kit at my link. Go check it out. Omnipod.com/juicebox Terms and Conditions apply. Full terms and conditions can be found at omnipod.com/juicebox Okay. Well, here we are at the end of the episode. You're still with me. Thank you. I really do appreciate. Appreciate that. What else could you do for me? Why don't you tell a friend about the show or leave a five star review? Maybe you could make sure you're following or subscribed in your podcast app, go to YouTube and follow me, or Instagram. Tiktok. Oh gosh, here's one. Make sure you're following the podcast in the private Facebook group as well as the public Facebook page you don't want to miss. Please do not know about the private group. You have to join the private group. As of this recording, it has 51,000 members in it. They're active, talking about diabetes, whatever you need to know. There's a conversation happening in there right now, and I'm there all the time. Tag me. I'll say hi. If this is your first time listening to the Juicebox Podcast and you'd like to hear more, download Apple podcasts or Spotify, really, any audio app at all, look for the Juicebox Podcast and follow or subscribe. We put out new content every day that you'll enjoy. Want to learn more about your diabetes management, go to Juicebox podcast.com up in the menu and look for bold beginnings, the diabetes Pro Tip series and much more. This podcast is full of collections and series of information that will help you to live better with insulin. Hey, what's up, everybody? If you've noticed that the podcast sounds better and you're thinking like, how does that happen? What you're hearing is Rob at wrong way recording, doing his magic to these files. So if you want him to do his magic to you, wrong wayrecording.com, you got a podcast. You want somebody to edit it. You want rob you?

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#1542 After Dark: Lighthouses

You can always listen to the Juicebox Podcast here but the cool kids use: Apple Podcasts/iOS - Spotify - Amazon Music - Google Play/Android - iHeart Radio -  Radio Public, Amazon Alexa or wherever they get audio.

Max opens up about bipolar disorder, body image, and the partner who supports her through complex mental and physical health battles.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends, and welcome back to another episode of The Juicebox Podcast.

Max 0:16
My name is Max. I just turned 28 and I've been a type one diabetic for 21 years.

Scott Benner 0:25
If you're living with type one diabetes, the after dark collection from the Juicebox Podcast is the only place to hear the stories that no one else talks about, from drugs to depression, self harm, trauma, addiction and so much more. Go to Juicebox podcast.com up in the menu and click on after dark there, you'll see a full list of all of the after dark episodes. Nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan.

Summertime is right around the corner, and Omnipod five is the only tube free automated insulin delivery system in the United States, because it's tube free. It's also waterproof, and it goes wherever you go. Learn more at my link, omnipod.com/juicebox That's right. Omnipod is sponsoring this episode of the podcast, and at my link, you can get a free starter kit. Terms and Conditions apply. Eligibility may vary. Full terms and conditions can be found at omnipod.com/juicebox today's podcast is sponsored by us Med, us, med.com/juicebox, you can get your diabetes supplies from the same place that we do. And I'm talking about Dexcom, libre, Omnipod, tandem and so much more. US, med.com/juicebox, or call 888-721-1514,

Max 2:01
my name is Max. I just turned 28 and I've been a type one diabetic for 21 years.

Scott Benner 2:08
That was perfect. So we're gonna keep going. You've been on the podcast before. Where could people hear you?

Max 2:12
So I'm on one of them. My first episode was a after dark episode. It's called life struggles. And then my second one was called peach clobber. And that one we kind of went over, you know, my name transition from Maddie to max and kind of what was going on. You know, just updating you on life,

Scott Benner 2:33
everything. Yeah, it was, it was a catch up episode. It was awesome. So what are we doing this time? I feel like you're the one person I track through their life. Honestly, yes,

Max 2:40
yes. And that's kind of like what I wanted to continue, I guess, yeah, no, it's awesome.

Scott Benner 2:45
And I've put you off a couple of times. You've tried to get on the schedule, and I was like, Oh, I can't do that, or it's been too soon, or anything. So I appreciate you being patient. Obviously. Give people just a couple of minutes. Like, where were you in your first episode The after dark was called, what was it called? Life struggles, okay? And where were you at that point? At that point, I

Max 3:09
had kind of gone over, you know, like, kind of the main point of trauma in my life, and we talked about that things were like, okay, at that point in life. Kind of gotten back on track with my diabetes. Things were going all right. And then into the second episode, things were going south again.

Scott Benner 3:30
How did they How did they go south? Is it so I,

Max 3:33
you know, wasn't taking care of myself again. I was in an abusive relationship. I was like, currently leading when we were recording that episode. But I mean leading the situation, which is really great. I, you know, started in a new field and work after that. I know a lot of stuff has happened since then. Really, I feel like that one was like our longest span without an episode.

Scott Benner 4:02
So episode 558, is called after dark life struggles. And then peach clobber is 812, so you haven't been on the podcast for like three years. This was you were on in 2021 then again towards the end of 2022 and now we're recording. It's spring 2025 Wow. Just tell people about your name change, and then we'll dive into where you are. Like, how did you What was that calling you in the first episode? What was that calling you in the second episode?

Max 4:30
So you're calling me Maddie in the first episode and then max in the second so the way that all happened was, I was a waitress at the time, and at that point in time, there's three of us, three Maddies on the floor, and it was getting really confusing, you know, differentiating between whose table was next, because there's three of us, and you'll get scheduled on a lot at the same time, right? So I was like, You know what? Like, I'm gonna change my name. On my card, so you can tell who's who. And so I chose Max, and I really liked that. So after a while, I started introducing myself as Max outside of work, and it just stuck. Yeah,

Scott Benner 5:14
psychologically. Do you think there was value from changing your name? Like, did it give you the permission to leave something behind, maybe, yeah,

Max 5:23
so we actually talked about that a little bit in the second episode. Or it was like, I kind of like shedded, you know, the old Natty, you know, I realized, you know, I was growing up into a different person, like, different values. I wanted to get my life on track. Like I was sick of, you know, just I wouldn't want to say doing the bare minimum, because I was still doing a lot, but I knew there was a lot I could improve.

Scott Benner 5:49
Okay? Do this for me. Describe Maddie in two sentences and include your diabetes.

Max 5:55
Okay, Maddie would make sure she got everything that needed to be done for her son, but not for herself.

Scott Benner 6:04
How old were you at that point? How old was your was your son?

Max 6:07
So I think I had turned I was around 24 Okay,

Scott Benner 6:12
yeah, and your son was how How old was he? When you were 24

Max 6:16
he was four, and he had health issues, right? Yeah, he had, he had cancer, right?

Scott Benner 6:23
And when you look back and you see Max, like, describe max, max

Max 6:28
brought light to what needed, what needed to be done, or so. And she started implementing those changes and working her eyes off

Scott Benner 6:39
what forces the transition. I mean, I know you were going through other things. And, I mean, you know, to say, a young, you know, young girl with a with a with a son, going through cancers. I mean, already a lot, but you had, you know, like you said, you had to move away from a situation. But, I mean, do you see it as, like, a pull yourself up moment where you're like, I'm looking at Maddie. This isn't going well. I need to do better. Like, is that it, is it that simple? Or Did something happen that, like, just made you go, Oh God, I have to, I have to change. I feel

Max 7:07
like there's always something that happens. Because, you know, life's always throwing me the hardest of punches. Okay? I feel like there's always, like, a big change, or like something major happens, and it really kicks me into gear. And also just kind of proves to myself, you know, like that I can get through these things, like I can do the things I want to accomplish. Like, the only one that's holding me back is usually myself. Who are

Scott Benner 7:34
you now? Like, present day, I'm still Max, yeah. Are you just a more refined version of that person you described, yeah, yeah. How have you refined it?

Max 7:43
Well, I mean, like, I said, like, I implemented those changes. I'm sticking with them now, more so than I was before. I feel like before I would get through the tough situation and kind of fall back a little bit, you know, like, now I'm keeping it more steady. So

Scott Benner 8:03
instead of the three steps forward, two steps back, you're lunging forward, holding ground, regrouping, doing it again. Yes, yeah. How is your son doing?

Max 8:12
He's doing great. He's doing a lot better. You know, beat cancer. It'll be three and a half years ago now, about Wow, but you know, like, we're having some struggles, you know, getting him back into school. He also was diagnosed with ADHD, so he's on medication now, and that's helped. He's in, they call it like a behavioral unit at school, just because he has, like, really big outbursts. You know, he can become kind of physical when he's escalated. That change in classroom environment, it's helped him a lot. Like, I don't have to be picking him up from school every day because something's happened and he enjoys it, like, he enjoys being at school now, you know, especially with the smaller classroom size, like, it's not very overwhelming for him. Yeah.

Scott Benner 9:00
How old is he now? He's seven. Wow, seven and a half. That's awesome. How were you as a child? Do you notice any of his behaviors being yours or no? Like,

Max 9:10
very few only because, like, when I look back to when I was a kid, like, I had undiagnosed ADHD, so there's, like, some things I can pick from there where I'm like, Oh, yeah. Like, he's kind of like that. But I feel like also me and him are growing up in much different environments, you know, like, I grew up in a very abusive household, you know, I was always walking on eggshells, like things really tough with him, you know, like, I'm very loving, I'm very patient with him, you know, like, he doesn't fear me. So I feel like there's, there's a lot of differences, a couple things, yeah, that are similar. You

Scott Benner 9:45
have a relationship. Are you with somebody? Or how is that going? I

Max 9:49
am actually engaged. Hey, look at

Scott Benner 9:54
you. How long have you been engaged?

Speaker 1 9:56
In? Like, three months

Scott Benner 9:58
now. Wow. I. How old is the relationship? It's about eight months. Oh, wow, that's quick. How old are you? How old are you today? I turned 28 two days ago. Oh, happy birthday. Thank you. That's awesome. Look at you. You're chugging along. Yeah. Do you have a date set? Or is it a little early for that? September

Max 10:15
19, 2026, or 2025,

Scott Benner 10:19
25 Wow, look at you. Awesome. Just found the right person. You could tell.

Max 10:23
Oh, yeah. How do you meet? We met at work. Actually, we worked for the same company, doing the same job.

Scott Benner 10:30
Oh, do you still do the same job? Today's episode is brought to you by Omnipod. It might sound crazy to say, but Summertime is right around the corner. That means more swimming, sports activities, vacations. And you know what's a great feeling, being able to stay connected to automated in some delivery while doing it all. Omnipod five is the only tube free automated insulin delivery system in the US, and because it's tube free and waterproof, it goes everywhere you do, in the pool, in the ocean or on the soccer field. Unlike traditional insulin pumps, you never have to disconnect from Omnipod five for daily activities, which means you never have to take a break from automated insulin delivery ready to go tube free. Request your free Omnipod five Starter Kit today at omnipod.com/juicebox, Terms and Conditions apply. Eligibility may vary. Full terms and conditions can be found at omnipod.com/juicebox type that link in your browser, or go to Juicebox podcast.com and click on the image of Omnipod right at the bottom, there's also a link right in the show notes of your podcast player. Diabetes comes with a lot of things to remember. So it's nice when someone takes something off of your plate. Us. Med has done that for us. When it's time for Arden supplies to be refreshed, we get an email rolls up and in your inbox says, Hi, Arden, this is your friendly reorder email from us. Med. You open up the email, it's a big button that says, Click here to reorder, and you're done. Finally, somebody taking away a responsibility instead of adding one. Us. Med has done that for us. An email arrives, we click on a link, and the next thing you know, your products are at the front door. That simple, us, med.com/juicebox, or call, 88872114, 887211514, I never have to wonder if Arden has enough supplies. I click on one link, I open up a box, I put the stuff in the drawer, and we're done. Us. Med carries everything from insulin pumps and diabetes testing supplies to the latest CGM like the libre three and the Dexcom g7 they accept Medicare nationwide over 800 private insurers, and all you have to do to get started is call 888-721-1514. Or go to my link, usmed.com/juicebox, using that number or my link helps to support the production of the Juicebox Podcast. No,

Max 13:01
so I'm actually a electrician, though,

Scott Benner 13:05
no kidding, yeah. How did you get into that crazy

Max 13:09
story? I'm gonna guess. Yeah, so for a year, like, just every year, I was working at a sign shop, so I was like, making, like, commercial signs, you know. So I was doing that, and I really enjoyed it. And I was like, you know, I really like working with my hands. A lot of our machines were breaking down. And I'm like, a tinker. I like to know how things work, you know, I like to get my hands dirty. So a lot of the times I was fixing some of the machines. So I was like, you know, like, I want to look into schooling for this, like, this seems really fun. And so I brought it up to management to see if they would help me, like, pay for schooling. And I was like, I know we really need, like, an in house mechanic, a tech, like, someone like, it would be really beneficial for the company instead of having to hire like, like, outsourcing, because I knew that our closest outsource for a mechanic or a tech was out of state, yeah. So I was like, you'd like, this would be really beneficial. Like, I could still work on the shop floor in areas, you know, and just be like, there as mechanic as needed. And the CEO was like, You know what? Like, yeah, like, that actually seems like a great idea. Why don't you bring it up to our CFO? And he was new, he just got hired onto the company, like, a month or two before, and I brought it up to him, and he was like, All right, like, we'll, we'll have a meeting in a week with, like, the CEO, and, like, we'll go over it. I was like, okay, cool. So a week goes by. I'm like, hey, just checking in to see if you guys had time to sit down and talk with me. He was like, Oh no. Like, I'm sorry we haven't get back to me tomorrow. And I was like, Okay. And that went on for another week. And I was like, You know what? Like, I'm tired of, you know, you guys just like being around the bush, like, not, you know, talking to me, like, what's going on? Yeah. And finally, like, a CFO came up to me, and he was like, let the answers no but not no forever. He was like, we just like, we can't depend on you because of, like, your attendance, because at that time, my son was having a lot of trouble in school. We just can't really depend on you. So it's a no but not no forever. And he was like, I understand it's hard as a single mom. And I was like, No, you don't understand. Actually, you're married, you don't have a

Scott Benner 15:28
kid. From a business perspective, they had a point. Yeah, I

Max 15:33
feel like they, they, they kind of did, but like, my emotions were, like, kind of getting in the way a little bit. So that night, I was, you know what? Like, if they're not going to help me, that's fine, like, I'm going to sign myself up. So I did, and the next day, my CFO actually bring me in again to his office to talk to me about it. And like, he was like, giving me, like, this whole spiel about, you know, like work culture, like this and that. And at the end of it, he was just like, Yeah, but like, I said, like, it's a no for now, but a not no forever. And I was like, it may be a no for you guys right now, but it's a yes for me. Like, I signed myself up last night, and his face was just kind of like in shock, like, it kind of like dropped a little bit, like his jaw dropped. And I was like, yeah, like to write, like, I don't need you guys to help me, like, if I want to move up, like, I like, I care about my job, like I care about my career, my growth, like, I'm going to make sure it gets done. How long was the was the schooling? So I'm actually still in it. So it's about a year and a half long, so I've just got a couple more months.

Scott Benner 16:36
And then did you move jobs, or are you still there? The

Max 16:39
thing about that is that, you know, he was talking about my attendance. Right after that week, my team lead hadn't missed a week of work because of the it was either the flu or COVID. I think it was COVID. The following week, I got COVID, so I had a doctor's note and everything, but I had to miss a week of work, and they pulled me in again and they fired me for

Scott Benner 17:01
being sick. Yes, that's tough. They didn't fire the other person. No, they had had enough for you. You think

Max 17:08
I felt, yeah, I think, I think I was just it, because it was like, also, after that, like me and the CFO, kind of like we were in bumping heads, but it was kind of apparent he didn't like me. Well,

Scott Benner 17:19
I think also, once you make it clear that you'd like to do something else, and they say no, now they probably feel like there's animosity there. And, you know what? I mean, yeah, and maybe, and there probably was, you were, I mean, you

Max 17:31
know, yeah. So they actually got me. They fired me for attendance and insubordination. And I was like, how are you going to get me for insubordination? Right? Why?

Scott Benner 17:41
Like, what did they say? I mean, do you think you did what they said? I asked

Max 17:45
them to give me examples, and they're like, no. Like, it's already been done, and like, this and that and, like, I kept asking, but then there was, like, just a point where I was like, You know what, like, I know I'm not gonna get my job back. Why am I it's like, why am I wasting my breath? So I was like, you know, okay, like, that's fine. I'll sign your paper. I'll leave. And what's crazy is that the CFO did it alone. He didn't tell anyone else in management. He didn't tell my team lead. It was after, like, everyone left. I had stayed a little bit later, and so I was like, when everyone was gone, he pulled me in and fired me the next day, the CEO even reached out to me and was like, I'm so sorry. Like, I didn't know about this. Everyone was like, apologizing to me. And I was like, you know, like, it's not your guys' fault, you know. Like you guys are fine. Like, I don't have any bad blood with you guys. Obviously,

Scott Benner 18:38
they don't like me. So how long were you out of work?

Max 18:41
Only two weeks. Because so they had fired me in the middle of January, like, literally, January 15. I signed up for school on January 2. They fired me on the 15th. I put out some applications, and February 2, I started my job as an apprentice electrician and got licensed. That's

Scott Benner 19:02
awesome. How is managing your diabetes with being an electrician? Is it any different than working on the floor in the shop? No,

Max 19:09
I feel like it's been easier actually, just because I'm moving around a lot, and it kind of made me focus on, you know, like fixing my doses because I'm still on MDI, but I noticed that I was going low a lot because of all the physical activity, and so it helped me, like, harness that a bit better. You know, don't get me wrong, there were times where, like, you have fallen off the wagon for a short amount of time, but I've gotten back on. I never let it be like an extended period of time, like I did before. Yeah, Max.

Scott Benner 19:44
What does that look like? What is falling off the diabetes wagon? Look like? It's

Max 19:48
more like I'm not taking my fast acting insulin like I'm supposed to. It's either like, I'll be like, skipping it because I'm like. Stressed out of work or, like, stuff's going on and it's harder for me to take care of it, which actually kind of ties in something else. And in the middle of last year, I was actually diagnosed with bipolar,

Scott Benner 20:12
really, yeah. How did you get that diagnosis? You

Max 20:16
know, I'm a single mom. I actually became even more of a single mom, because, you know, like his, his dad was in the picture still before, you know, we just, you know, split time, but he ended up terminating his parental rights. Well,

Scott Benner 20:33
how do you do that? I'm looking into that. Now, you brought it up. I might, maybe I can, you know, I mean, get out some of these bills. Well, no, no, seriously, how did that? How did that happen? I don't understand. So, another

Max 20:45
crazy story. In the middle of everything, his dad had, like, moved away to Boise, Idaho for a little bit for work, and that's when we're still splitting time. But I was thinking about, like, Oliver's gonna stay with me. You know, he's already set up in school. He has all of his doctors here, like he's under my insurance, like it was just, it's just logical to keep him here. And he was like, okay, like, I'll pay child support, like, whatever. And, I mean, he never did. But anyways, he had moved to Boise, and I actually had ended up moving in with his parents, because me and his family still have, like, a really strong relationship. Yeah, and a couple months after that, I, you know, because he moved away, and it was just me and Oliver, I, you know, realized that I was like, I need to take care of my diabetes better. Like, I know I'm still struggling with an eating disorder. It was just me and him, like, I really need to be on top of this, because he only had he only has me, yeah, and so I actually contacted my insurance to see where I could go to inpatient treatment or diabetes. And the closest place was in Colorado. And luckily, I guess, at that time, his dad had moved back because things weren't working out with work, so he was going to be watching all over again half of the time, and then my family would step in for the time I was missing. So right as all of that was getting set up, you know, I was already out in Colorado, I'm about to, you know, like, get, like, checked in and everything. I get a call that Oliver's dad's brother, who was like my brother too. He was in the hospital because he had a massive stroke in his brain stem, and he was brain dead. My God. How old was he? Oliver? Or his brother, the

Scott Benner 22:38
brother that had the stroke, he's 21 Jesus. Was that natural or do is it brought on by something

Max 22:45
he had, I don't like, a really rare kidney disease, and so he would, like, swell up really bad. They we knew that it was going to take him at some point, okay, but we didn't think it was going to be associated,

Scott Benner 22:58
sure, sure. And then, but, and how does this lead to the, you know, your son's father being like, Yo, I don't, I don't need to be involved in this anymore. So I

Max 23:04
got that phone call, and I was like, I'm driving back right now. I feel everyone was like, you know, Jordan would want you to go back to the, you know, inpatient treatment, like, finish this. I was like, You're right. Like, I know he would. He would kick my ass if we were, if he were still here. So again, Dr drove back out to Colorado, and then I get a phone call from one of my brothers, and my brother says that while they're getting getting him ready to get in the bath, Oliver said that someone on his dad's side of the family, or like someone that he's near when he's with his dad, was touching him inappropriately in the bathtub. So I drove back again. Max,

Scott Benner 23:42
hold on a second. How do you not give up? You're 28 a lot more than a lot. That's an unfair statement a lot. Like, there's needs to be a bigger word for a lot, but so many things have happened to you. We haven't even gotten to the eating disorder thing and the outpatient thing because it's in the middle of the story. But like, I don't know. Like, how do you not hear that and go, I'm, I'm just gonna, I'm gonna go up to the top of one of these Colorado mountains and sit here for a while. Like, seriously, where do you get the energy for it?

Max 24:09
I honestly don't know. I feel like, you know, my son just really keeps me going. Like, I know I can't let him down, and I need to be the person for him that I didn't have when I was growing up. Yeah,

Scott Benner 24:22
you got a mom motor, that's for sure. Okay, I'm sorry. So your son at that point, how long

Max 24:27
ago was this? This was like, two years ago,

Scott Benner 24:31
two years ago. Your son's getting a bath, and he says, somebody touches me and then, and you're away at outpatient treatment for an eating disorder, yeah.

Max 24:41
So again, yeah. So I talked to other people at the facility, you know, it's like, I have a, really another family emergency, like, I'm sorry I can't, I can't stay right now. And they're like, We understand if you come back, just let us know. Like, we'll be happy to take you because. And but yeah, so I drove back, I had filed a report, and I was like, you know, like, I can't let him go with his dad, you know, like, obviously something's happening while he's over there, so I had to keep him from his dad, and I got a lawyer, and I is fighting for custody of him, because we had never put any of that in place, like, through the courts. And so I was filing for full, like, full custody. So, you know, like, legal everything. And you know, obviously his dad was upset, you know, his brother had just died, like, literally, like a day before, right? And it

Scott Benner 25:39
sounded like his family was supportive of you. They they like you live there and you feel like you had a you felt like you had a good relationship with them, I imagine,

Max 25:46
yeah, definitely. I mean, like, I still do right? I have a very strong feeling about who did it. The person's not, like, blood related, it would be his father's wife's, you

Scott Benner 26:01
don't have to say. But like, somebody, yeah, somebody, like, tangentially related to the family, yeah.

Max 26:06
But like, I mean, like, that relationship between me and his family is still there. Like, they still care for him very much. You know, they're still there for me.

Scott Benner 26:15
Can he see his son? Or can he not even see him? Or can he just not go with your with his dad. So,

Max 26:21
I mean, legally, he's a stranger to him. Now I don't let him see him okay.

Scott Benner 26:27
Do you think he knew it was happening? I don't know okay, because when

Max 26:34
it all happened, and you know, like his dad had finally heard about it, because I wasn't giving Oliver up to him. I'm sorry. I just lost my train of

Scott Benner 26:44
thought. Don't worry. I guess what I'm wondering is, let me take you a different idea. How do you substantiate that to like, a court system, like your son says something, we want to listen to him, but how do you prove it enough to take away, like, his dad's rights? I

Max 26:58
see, I see. So yeah, Oliver only said what happened and where it happened, but so because of that, yeah, like, we couldn't, like, actually, like, put that in place to use against, you know, like, him or whatever. But how do you even make

Scott Benner 27:12
sure it's true? Like, do you mean, like, I'm not saying don't believe the kid. I'm saying it's a big thing. Like, how do you prove it all out? So

Max 27:18
the child goes in for, like, an interview and an examination at the Children's Justice Center. So, I mean, Oliver went through all of that, and I guess, like, Oliver wouldn't say who did it, so we only had the like, the case was closed, but it'll always be able to be open, like any point in time, like, even when he's an adult, if he does decide to say or remembers that they're like, there's, it's like, on file that there was a case open,

Scott Benner 27:49
what he reveals at that Justice Center is enough for the courts to do what they did. No, no. So

Max 27:56
what had happened was Tyler ended up, like, agreeing to giving me, you know, full custody. But he was throwing a fit about how much child support he was going to have to pay. Okay? So he was like, I want the courts to go over, you know, like, do the calculations again. Because it's like the calculations went through ORs. And he's like, I want the courts to do the calculations on how much child support I'm supposed to be paying you, because you just want my money like this and that. And I was like, No, I've never asked you for money like you didn't even pay me child support when you moved to Idaho. So I was like, You know what? Like, if you're really bugging out about having to pay child support, you have the option to terminate your rights so you don't have to pay child support and but you need to understand what that's going to entail.

Scott Benner 28:44
You saw this as a way of, like, just cutting him away. Like, did you think he was going to take that when you told him, like, you could give up your rights? No, no, I didn't.

Max 28:53
Oh, and it was crazy, because I I told my lawyer that, because we're obviously talking through lawyers, two hours later, no less that we had got the response that Tyler agreed.

Scott Benner 29:04
Wow, no, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everybody. That's sad, yeah, on a lot of different levels, but still, it's sad. Tell me a little bit more about how you figured out there was an eating disorder and going off to treatment for it, and did you ever make it back to treatment? So I mean,

Max 29:24
I knew, like, it was more, like I wasn't accepting it, but like I knew it was there, and I kind of, like, just hit it very well, because, like, I wasn't going, like, to the hospital for DKA or anything like, I'll run it just high enough that I was losing weight, or, like, fix it before I'd have to go to the hospital. But because of, you know, like, his dad being gone again, he like, I kicked to gear where I was, like, it's only me. I need to get help. I need to be there for my son. Like, I need to be healthy. Yeah, that's how it, like, came slight, like, I. Sought the help out myself, like I was gonna make sure everything was gonna be done, Oliver was gonna be cared for, but I actually didn't end up making it back to the facility, because once everything was happening with the courts, that's when, like, I was on top of everything. I'm not gonna let my son be without like, I'm not gonna put him through that. I'm not gonna put him through what I went through as a child, you know, losing my mother. Yeah, it really kicked the entire year. You

Scott Benner 30:26
feel like you pulled it together on your own. Is it a struggle, still, like a daily struggle? Does it rear its head sometimes to come and go? How does it, how does it live in your life now, I

Max 30:35
don't struggle with it anymore, and so I mean, like my blood sugar, my management, had stayed better. I was still having, like, the bad, you know, like self image and struggling with that, but my fiance actually has helped me a lot with that. You know, I'm, I tell them all the time, you know, like I've become more accepting my body, like I'm comfortable in my own body like I'm happy,

Scott Benner 31:02
yeah. How

Max 31:04
has he helped you with that? He makes me believe that he loves my body just the way it is, no matter what which. It was really hard to accept that, especially since, sorry, I'm taking off my boot right now. I just got out of the cast yesterday, so you might hear it in the background. No, it's fine, go ahead. But like, even when, you know, so actually got diagnosed with kidney disease as well a while back. So you know, there's times where if I eat a lot of sodium, like, I'll be really puffy in the morning, like, super swollen. And, like, I struggled with that before, where I was, like, I wouldn't want to go to work, like I wouldn't want to go outside, I didn't want anyone to see me, like I thought it was disgusting

Scott Benner 31:45
because you were retaining water and you were you were puffy, okay? And

Max 31:49
now, you know, like, he calls me his puffy pastry princess, and it makes me happy.

Scott Benner 31:56
Well, you know, it's interesting to hear somebody say, like, how, you know, I'm uncomfortable with my body, and I think people would immediately maybe jump to the idea that that's just like your size or something like that, but it's, it's got a lot more to do with a lot more than they might imagine. Yeah, it's a strange thing to hear you say that you you're uncomfortable with how you look, but only strange from the perspective of somebody who doesn't understand what like body dysmorphia might feel like. Yeah. I mean, a lot of the things that you're going through and that a lot of people go through, are quite elusive, as far as like, being able to explain them to the masses, to people who don't go through it. Because I probably said this in both of your episodes, I'm happy to say it again. You're adorable. It is heartbreaking to hear that you don't, like, look in a mirror and see that, yeah. I mean, like, I feel,

Max 32:47
I mean, like, now that I'm healthier, like, I am just, like, slightly bigger, you know, just as I'm not using my diabetes, you know, for weight loss. So I'm like, I'm a little bit bigger, but like, I know that I'm healthy. Yeah, I know that I'm healthy. I know that I'm loved. I know that it doesn't matter what I look like and I like. Really come to accept that.

Scott Benner 33:10
What in your past Do you think led to your body dysmorphia? My stepdad? Oh, for sure, yeah. And is that the way he spoke to you or interactions?

Max 33:23
Yeah. I mean, like he would tell me to, you know, like, eat less. You would tell me I was too fat to go to work. He would force me to work out a lot.

Scott Benner 33:34
That is a lot, obviously, and then get away from him. But that still sticks to you. That's not a thing you can shake, right?

Max 33:42
Yeah, yeah. It stuck with me for a really long time, but you don't feel the same way now. No, no, I don't. And you know, you know, just like, as an adult, and like, I know he was wrong for what he did. I know he was just wrong period, yeah? But, you know, like, I look back at that stuff and I'm, like, ill, like, I was just a child and, like, obviously, like, I believed you like, most everything he said, you know, like he was, quote, unquote, my parent figure, no, I hear you. I understand,

Scott Benner 34:15
I mean, I understand why it would get you like that. It just, it's, it's valuable for you to explain it so other people can hear and tell people, just for people, just real quickly. How old were you when you were diagnosed? Type one? I was seven. Seven. Okay, so at some point you figure out, if I hold back my insulin, keep my blood sugars higher, you know, my body is. It weighs less and, yeah, you manipulate that. How long do you think you did that for? Oh, geez,

Max 34:40
it was just over 10 years, like, when it's crazy is that, you know, like when I was much younger, like I went to rehab for my eating disorder. I, you know, have a lot of like, self help books on it. And actually, the average amount of time that it takes to fully recover for. An eating disorder is about 10 years. And

Scott Benner 35:03
that's 10 years of working at it and trying and yeah and failing and bounce like, like you said earlier, like three steps forward, couple back, start again, and then, but she didn't give up. It's pretty awesome. Thank you. Yeah, if I had to say to you, what's the first thing you think of when I say, What saved your life? Is it your son? Yes, yeah, right. Like, always being a mom, like

Max 35:27
so many points in my life, so many and now

Scott Benner 35:31
you've met a guy that you you seem to like, that's awesome. And how does he feel about the like, how do you feel? Well, let me get my timeline straight. First you met him, you said, not that long ago, about eight months ago, okay, when did you get your bipolar diagnosis? Just a

Max 35:46
couple months before that, before, like, 910, months ago, 10 months ago, I say,

Scott Benner 35:50
so that's something he knows about when he meets you, or at some point, okay, how do you introduce that to somebody, and how do they blend it into their like, you know what I mean? Like, how does that? Like, how did he hear that and then go, Okay, make sense of it. And said that this doesn't stop me from wanting to be in a relationship so

Max 36:08
with it. So, like, I have so many medical conditions, like diagnoses and stuff. What I love about him is that when I tell him about these things, he actually learns about it, or, like, asks me about it. You know, he wants to know, you know, and he doesn't like, there isn't that stigma when you like, first tell someone like, oh, like I'm bipolar, and they're like, oh, like you're crazy, like, I don't want to be around you where he genuinely cares,

Scott Benner 36:35
learns about it and tries to figure out how to help you with it, yeah. Well, that sounds like love and does he have anything going on? No, no. Medically for

Speaker 1 36:45
him, like he's pretty healthy, I'd say, like he's pretty

Scott Benner 36:49
good. He's like, I'm unencumbered. I can handle a couple of things. Yeah, it's really very lovely. What aspects of your health Do you find that sharing helps you with? And have there been anything that you just haven't told him about, like, stuff that, you know, I mean, you're like, No, this is for me, or are you just a completely open book? I have

Max 37:08
a completely open book. Like, he has a list of all my diagnoses and like medications that I take, and like, even helps me with, like, taking my medication, like, he'll remind me. And like, you know, like, we have, like the share app, or like the Dexcom, and he'll, like, look at my blood sugars and make sure I'm okay if I'm not paying attention.

Scott Benner 37:30
So when you're using insulin or or withholding insulin to manipulate weight, you have an actual moment where just life gets overwhelming and you forget to Bolus for a meal. Like, how do you know the difference between, like, slippery slope or the eating disorder, and what's like, just burnout, or is there no difference? Do they just go hand in hand? I feel like there's

Max 37:53
definitely a difference. So, like, with my eating disorders, like I was fully aware of what I was doing and like, I was, I was purposely doing it when I just, like, missed a dose. It's like, Oh shoot. Like, I missed a dose. I can see it in my blood sugar now, like, let's just take care of it. I did have like, a little bit of a burnout, you know, just a couple months ago. But like I said, like, Chris helps me a lot, and he kind of helped me, like, get back on track. And he's like, you know, like you need to be healthy for all of us, like we want you to be in our lives as long as possible. And he's definitely a big part of my support system.

Scott Benner 38:32
And on top of that, does he understand the slippery slope nature of that and the eating disorder? Yes, yes, he does. Like, he

Max 38:41
knows about all my history, and, you know, like, I said, like, I'm very open with him, yeah, because, like, I know when I'm doing things like that purposely, you know, like, all, like, I'll tell them, you know, like, hey, like, this was, like, this would happen in my past, you know, so, just so you're aware, like, if, like, you see any of these things if, if I notice these things, like, I'll tell him, or like, he'll tell me, like, hey, like, sniff us in the bud,

Scott Benner 39:08
and you're able to hear that and not get defensive,

Max 39:12
yeah, awesome. I really care about his input, and I take it to heart and I act on it. No,

Scott Benner 39:20
that's crazy. I mean, crazy because, like, I've been married for like, 30 years, and, you know, that's your goal, that's everybody's goal, but it's sometimes somebody says something to you and you're just like, whoa, what? Like, you know what? I mean, like, you have a defensive reaction to it, but, but you're not that's crazy. Crazy exciting for me. Actually, it's a thing. I was just like, oh, okay, what about the management of the bipolar? Like, I mean, that's a whole new thing to learn about. It must be difficult to find a good doctor. How do you like, how do you manage it? Does it flare? You know, what's it look like?

Max 39:51
That's crazy. Actually. Like, how I got the diagnosis? It was middle of last year. I was, you know, obviously, really burnt out. My diabetes with all of her, you know, because it was like, it like just me at that time now, because his dad was out of the picture, and I was getting super overwhelmed, like I was bawling my eyes out, like every day, like I was just really down and depressed, like I couldn't handle it anymore, like I was getting close to sending my son with my sister, one of my sisters, because she's a foster parent. Like, it got to that point where I was like, I can't handle it. I believe that Oliver would have been better off with someone else. My mom was like, here, like, here's this emergency, like, helpline, or like, something like that. Like, call them, see if they can help you in any way. And I was like, okay, so I did call that phone number, and, you know, talk to them on the phone for a while. And what was crazy is that while I was on the phone with them, and they were telling me that they were gonna fly me out to Florida for treatment for a month, the next day, there was a baby praying mantis that I saw in front of me, like, just appear. And I, like, looked up, feel like the meaning of like praying mantises, like, if they cross your path or whatever. And it was like something like hope and like good things happening and like success, like this and that. And I remember, like crying even more. I ended up switching it to, like, two days to be ship, shipped out to Florida so I could get like, like work taken care of, like, Oliver's care stuff like that, before I left. And so in Florida they that's where they diagnosed me with the bipolar, and they put me on medication. I've only switched medications once, and it seemed to be working really well for me. I've noticed a difference with my diabetes management while I've been on that medication, because so, I mean, like, I'm on Adderall, and it helps me take my medication, but I noticed that there would be, like, a couple months where it was a lot easier for me, and then a couple months where it was a lot harder, and then again, it was just like this, up and down, up and down. But it's like I was not taking care of myself for, like, a really long, extended period of time, okay, but so once I got on the medication, it helped with those lows and helped me stay more steady in my care. Awesome.

Scott Benner 42:20
That's great. So the medication, like, by helping you feel more what are we looking for to feel normal? Like, what's the word use? I would use,

Max 42:29
like, steady. Okay, because of the bipolar, you have those highs and you have those lows, the medication really helps me feel more steady. Okay,

Scott Benner 42:37
awesome. So when you have that, and you're able to think, and your ADHD is being managed, well, then you're able to focus on things. And do you see yourself as, like, oh, like, This is who I could be. You know what I mean? Does every Have you ever had a hindsight moment where you've looked back and thought, like, I wonder if, like, some of this would have helped me in the past?

Max 42:56
Oh, yes, a lot with both medications, for sure, really, again. Like, it makes looking back, it makes a lot of sense. For a long time, I thought it was just my period making me crazy, my body could be a lot healthier for sure. Like, maybe I wouldn't have the kidney disease or neuropathy, you know, I wouldn't have the chronic pancreatitis, the epi I feel like I could have been a much healthier individual.

Scott Benner 43:22
And so does that give you a lot of like, perspective? Does that make you excited for where you are? Does it make you sad for what you missed? Or maybe both? I don't know,

Max 43:29
I feel it's definitely a bit of both. You know, sometimes I don't refill my medications at the right time. So like, maybe I'll, like, go a day without one of my pills, you know, like, I might be, like, feeling like my nerve pain, for example, and I'm like, you know, like, if I took care of myself better when I was younger, like, I could have prevented this, but, like, I realized, like, it wasn't, like, entirely my fault.

Scott Benner 43:52
What do you do with those feelings? Like, how do you manage through them? I'll usually

Max 43:56
Dr Chris will be like, my body's so broken, and he's like, you're okay, like, I love you. It'll be fine. Like, we'll get on top of this. Don't worry. Find

Scott Benner 44:05
the hope is just the important part is that it is it just being hopeful that's valuable.

Max 44:09
I'm very hopeful. I'm a very hopeful person. I'd say you

Scott Benner 44:13
would have to be, I imagine is that the key in a moment when you're dealing with something that's from the past, that can't be changed, that's had an impact on today. But it's not the end of you like you can, you know, you can still manage like that. Hope is what is, what allows you to just gather up and go, Okay, this is the current situation. I'm just gonna, I'm gonna play with the cards I was dealt. Kind of a thing,

Max 44:34
actually. I always remember this picture. I was, like, scrolling on social media, like, a long time ago. And, you know, like, a few sentences on it, and it says, you know, like, you only got like, $1 to your name, like, just keep going. Like the car broke down. Like, just keep going. Like, it gives like, these lists of examples, you know, like things that happen. And at the end of every sentence says, just. Keep going. And that just stuck in my head, right? That's

Scott Benner 45:05
good advice. Advice, simple, obvious, sometimes, but not always, obvious enough to take and, and I think probably the secret of most people who persevere, you know, yeah,

Max 45:16
because, I mean, there's, there's nothing you can do to change the past, like, what's happened, has happened. You know, the only thing you can do is go into action in the present to change the future. Yeah,

Scott Benner 45:29
that's, that's an incredibly valuable thought. I hope you should say that twice so people heard it for sure. I

Max 45:35
think you actually second set in the second episode, yeah? Well,

Scott Benner 45:38
keep saying it, because the people need to hear it, but it's working for you. And I think it's great to show like, you know, a gap of a number of years between the thing you said, and, you know, you're still doing it, and it's still helping you through some pretty significant issues like yours is not like for the faint of heart. You know what? I mean, you're not on here talking about, like I went to school and somebody was mean to me, like you got big stuff going on, you know, and that you keep pushing through like this is awesome. Where do you see yourself in another 10 years?

Max 46:09
I see myself successful and happy with my family, and now just living life, not letting things bring me down in not letting myself add up more health issues on top of what I've got

Scott Benner 46:25
just do well and try to maintain better yourself where you can enjoy your life. Yeah,

Speaker 1 46:31
pretty simple.

Scott Benner 46:34
Well, you know what? It does seem pretty simple, and then you try to do it, and it's not always that simple. Yeah, right. Just keep going, yeah. But also having good people around you is valuable. More than valuable, it's, it's key, you know, yeah, yeah, because you've had times where you've been you and had people around you who aren't helping, and it's hard to get through that, and now you're just being you more, but with a person with you who's supportive and understanding and and you can see, you get a lot more poor motion that way. Do you ever think about getting an insulin pump?

Max 47:04
Yeah, so actually, I just got a new endocrinologist, and I was gonna speak to them with that about that

Scott Benner 47:11
you're up to thinking about it now, yeah. Where do you think the value will be for you by going to it? Obviously

Max 47:18
I could have tighter control on my blood sugar. The only thing that worries me is the tubing. Of course, it was like, just like in my field of work, you know, I'm having to climb, you know, like, around and go into tight spaces, and I'm in ceilings, you know, and there's a lot of things that, like, you know, brush against my body, or it's like, I don't want the tubing to get snagged. But then I know there's also the Omnipod. I know that, you know, like, I've had a couple sensors rip off, you know, like at work, because, you know, again, like climbing through stuff, having to crawl stuff, like that. So I'm worried, you know, like that, Omnipod could also, you'll be ripped off of me. Well,

Scott Benner 47:58
yeah, I mean, your options are Omnipod or like the Moby, the tandem Moby, like those seem like two smaller like options. And I think maybe, if you just, I mean, I've heard a lot of people talk about this that are in the trades, so I would think if you treated them, maybe the way football players treat them, one of those sports wraps, maybe they keep it a little tight to you while you're working, that might really help. I mean, listen, it's not, it wouldn't stop you from hitting a piece of duct work and maybe ripping it off, right? If you really, like, made a close turn and caught something. But I would think for the bumps like and, you know, nudges and stuff like that, that might be valuable. You know, it's an extra step. If you think the pump is going to help you, you know, any pump is going to help you, and that's what's holding you back. There might be some workarounds there. Yeah, you're right. I didn't think about that. Yeah, that's why I'm here. I'm just here to make a podcast. And then, you know, an hour into it, mentioned that you could do like a sport, pretty much my job. And to give you a place to tell your story and everybody else, can you tell people a little bit about I haven't had a lot of people on three times. Let me say something I know you'll take well, okay, you're not the most dynamic speaker. Like, you're not like, big and like, you don't get like, oh, like, you're not loud, you don't grab people's attention. You're not telling, like, super fun stories. Your stories are like, bummers. They're stories of, like, getting through tough things in life. But they're very valuable. People enjoy hearing them. I think they give people perspective. You have a ton more perspective than most people do, so you're lending it out to them, but I want to know, like, what makes you keep wanting to come back? Like, what is this doing for you? This process of talking to me,

Max 49:30
I like to tell people that I feel like I'm a lighthouse. And what I mean by that is that it's like I am a beacon of hope, you know, just because of what I have gone through, you know, like I can share my experiences with others. Be like, Hey, like you're not alone. You're not the only one. Like you, you can get through this like you, you will be okay. The lighthouse also means a lot to me, because my mother, she loved lighthouses. You know, we had a whole bunch of like, little statues. Shoes and my clocks and little trinkets, you know that were lighthouses. And you your your ship, it's out at sea, going through rough waters, and you just look for that beacon of light,

Scott Benner 50:12
yeah, who is your lighthouse? Who is my lighthouse? Oh, that's a good question, yeah, because I like that. You feel like you want to be that for other people, but like, who's doing that for you? And, I mean, your guy is an easy answer, but you haven't known him that long. So like, Who or what have you used over the years? Maybe you've had a number of different lighthouses, like, what have you used over the years that have that's done that for you? I

Max 50:36
don't know actually, like, I had never thought about that. You have

Scott Benner 50:42
a caregiver mentality, obviously. Like, I mean, you're a young mom whose kid had cancer and you got through that. You're wired to help people. And so it's interesting that when I asked you that question, what you said was, I help I want to do it to help people, which is awesome. I'm not saying otherwise, but who's helping you? Or what do you use that gives you that thing? Like, I'll give you mine outside of my family, which I think is, you know, probably pretty obvious, but I got a note the other day that said that the Facebook group is, you know, I don't want to, like, give somebody's thing away. This person's having mental health issues. They found the Facebook group, and it's helping them significantly, and they outlined for a while how it helped them. And I thought, Oh, that's awesome. Like, you know, like, so great that this is working for somebody. But then another person comes into the thread and says, I use this group in a very similar way, and then told their story in a post, you know, then another person comes and another and these statements get likes and hearts, and people come in and they go, this thing is so valuable for me. And I think that seeing other people helped helps me, and it allows me to keep doing the thing I'm doing. Because this could get meticulous, and it doesn't like the making of like, I've recorded five podcasts this week, and people could say like, oh, it's easy. You sit down and do it. Trust me, you go ahead and do it. You go ahead and, you know, interview and talk and and, you know, do all the technical things around this. You won't do it for two weeks. It's not easy. When it gets too businessy, like, you know what I mean? Like, it just feels like the thing I do every day, someone steps up and shares a story about the thing that I did and how it helped them, and it gives you enough energy for me, at least, it gives me enough energy to want to do it again so that someone else could do it. Because 11 years into this max, like most people would have quit, or they would have wanted to grow it into something else, or turn it into something else. And I just like what this thing does for people with diabetes. You know what I mean? Like, I don't, I'm not looking to make it different or bigger or, you know, I'm not looking to go on YouTube and see, like, Oh, this is what people think is good now, like, I should try to shift to that. Like, I don't want to shift to that. Like, if my thing never grows past where it is right now, it doesn't matter to me, because I know what it does for the people who find it. And so I would think that everyone listening who either takes the time to share back with me, or at least I see them out there, through downloads and in streams and stuff like that. Like, I know that some of them, maybe a lot of them, are getting something similar to what the people who share with me online are experiencing. And to me that, like, I draw the light out of that, but I'm wondering, like, where do you get it from

Max 53:24
now that I put more thought into it? Like, I don't want to sound like vain or anything, but I feel like it's almost for myself. Nothing wrong with that. Like, I I'll, like, tell people, or like, mostly Chris or like, I look back all my life and I see, like, all the things I've been through, all the things I've overcome, all the challenges and, you know, like that I've been able to get to just keep going. And it keeps me, like, in the mindset that, you know, like that I can conquer or accomplish whatever gets thrown, like thrown my way, yeah, and

Scott Benner 54:05
I'm very lucky that I am this way, because a lot of things I've been through, I'm sure, have taken people's lives. Actually, I gotta tell you, if nothing else came out of your three interviews. I'd be happy if nothing else, but what you just said came I think a lot more came out of it than that. But that was maybe the most insightful and thoughtful thing that anybody said to me in quite some time. You're your own lighthouse. And you said, I don't wanna sound vain, but I was like, What is she gonna say? But that doesn't sound vain at all. It doesn't sound like anything but confident and not confident, cocky or confident, like you're just like, look, what I've been through is a beacon. And if I can't find that beacon somewhere else, I'll just shine it out into the world and then draw it back for myself as well. I'll help other people if I can, but I'm gonna use it to help myself. Seriously, that was awesome. How did you come up with that? I. Been, is that a thing you've thought before? No, no.

Max 55:05
Like, I've never thought about, you know, like, who's my Lighthouse or where I get it from? So

Scott Benner 55:11
off the top of my head, that's it. We should stop. I should never make another episode of this podcast. It should be the last thing anybody has said on here, which is, go out there and put good stuff out into the world. And then, you know what? If somebody won't give it back to you, take some back for yourself. That's awesome. Not really. It's so simple too, but not because I have to write that down. We'll workshop it. We'll get it down to a T shirt slogan. But No, but seriously, that is really, maybe, like, one of the more compelling and thoughtful and uplifting statements anybody's made in a long time. That right there is why I don't care what people think is popular or what's popular in the moment, but a thing like Tiktok or a short on YouTube, I don't care if you know how the delivery systems change over time, nothing's going to replace long, thoughtful, sometimes rambling conversations with an interested interviewer, because that is not a thing you say out loud if we don't spend the last hour talking. And I might argue that, had we not spent three, you know, two hours talking prior to that too. So that was really wonderful, man, you just made me my whole weekend is going to be better now,

Max 56:27
thank you. Oh, I'm like, smiling right now. I'm all happy about it. Good, good. I

Scott Benner 56:32
want you smiling. You deserve it. Yeah, no, seriously, like, don't get don't get meek. Now, Max, you deserve it. You really do. I mean, everyone deserves it, but also it's turned you into a really thoughtful and still young adult. Like, I know that probably doesn't feel that way to you, but like you're young. You know, you don't feel young, I imagine. No, I don't. You're 28

Speaker 1 56:57
feel like I've lived five lifetimes. Oh

Scott Benner 56:59
yeah, yeah. But we need to get you into a place where you're bored. Oh

Max 57:03
no, I am so bored right now because of being in my cast, being home forever, yeah, it's been awful. I've been driving myself crazy. I've been crocheting a lot. Well,

Scott Benner 57:15
not that kind of bored. Well, maybe not that kind of boredom. When you bought a keyboard, I'm talking about like, I'm talking about the boredom that comes with with life, and comfort with knowing that the people around you are going to do the things, and that the support is going to be there, and that the money is going to be there, and that every day is not like, just you wondering, like, what trap you're gonna have to chew your leg out of next you know what? I mean? Yeah, I like a little bit of that, like, comfort for you. And it sounds like maybe this is going to happen. Being an electrician is a reasonably good paying job, is it not? It is? Yeah, what's the boy do he making some money? Yeah, he does the same thing. I do awesome. I love it. And do you have? How many kids do you have? Like, why do I not feel like I know that exactly,

Max 58:00
so it's crazy about it. So I have Oliver, but I actually just had a miscarriage a couple days ago. Oh,

Scott Benner 58:07
my God. Well, don't Jesus, how did you even come on here to do this? I don't know. Well, no,

Max 58:14
it's crazy, though I've been obviously thinking about it a lot. Yeah, so I know we talked about, you know, like my mother passing, and how she had died the day before my birthday. I found out I lost the baby the day before my birthday as well. Jesus.

Scott Benner 58:29
Were you trying to get pregnant? No, it was a

Max 58:33
surprise. I was telling Chris. I was like, and I told my sister as well. I was like, I feel like my mom is watching over me, and or at least I want to believe you know, that she's watching over me and that she just knew it wasn't the right time in my life for that to happen. Yeah, and she decided that she needed to take care of the baby for

Scott Benner 59:03
me. Well, that's a nice way to think about it, for sure. I'm sorry that that happened. You hear people say things happen for a reason all the time. I don't know if I, you know. I don't know how far into that I can, I can buy, but I don't think you need another new thing in your life. Like, honestly, like, I, I'd like to see you just settle in and just stay the course for a while, not saying that I'm happy for you know, your sadness, obviously, but I can see value in you not having another thing, yeah, you know. And no matter what it is, I wouldn't tell you shouldn't buy a kitten. Do what I'm saying. I don't want you doing anything. I want you. I want you like, just work on your relationship. Take care of yourself, you know, and and get into a nice rhythm, get through with your schooling and, and, you know, get out there and make yourself some money and be comfortable. Take care of all the things you got going on. It sounds like you're doing great, like you just need to stay the course.

Max 59:54
Yeah, yeah, definitely. I think I've really come to, like, a turning point in my life where, for. Most part is on the up.

Scott Benner 1:00:01
You're on the upswing. As far as I can say. This sadness aside, but I mean, listen, maybe nobody better to deal with something sad than you, like you should be able to traverse this. I'd be surprised if this was the thing that got you, you know, yeah, I'll finish up with this. Do you ever have a thought in your head, like, where you go? Like, has enough? Not like, is this it like, how can there be more? Have you ever thought, yeah, I would think that. I mean, honestly, a lot, yeah, it's not how it works. You don't just like, Oh, I got one thing. I don't get two things. I got three. You can't get four. Like, but like, at some point, have you ever stepped back and said, like, Where's all this coming from? Can you see where it's coming from? Or is it just randomness? Like,

Max 1:00:45
I was like, Hitler to pass life or something. You

Scott Benner 1:00:50
know what happened? SCOTT I um, I was a terrible person in a past life. I'm getting paid back. Yeah, everybody feels that way. I bet who has, like, type one or other autoimmune stuff, they're probably like, Oh, what did I do? Like, kick puppies in my last life or something. And does it just seem random? Like, have you ever, like, had a moment where, because, like, you've, you know, talked about a couple of signs in your life today and everything like that? Have you ever had that feeling of, like, this is where it's coming from? Or, I mean, would that be silly too? I feel

Max 1:01:17
like most, if not all, of the things, like, the major things that I've been through have been at random, like there was no reason, like or like it was unpreventable. And I'm just so lucky to, you know, experience all of them, but I don't feel like it really stems from anything purposeful. Yeah,

Scott Benner 1:01:37
it's actually not my question, but Arden and I were in the car last night together, and I don't know what we were talking about, but she said, and she had never really said this at any point to us in the past, but she goes, like, there's times when I've thought, like, Okay, well, like, that's gotta be it. You know, like, something comes up, and she's like, well, that has to be it. And it's interesting to see it from her perspective, because from our perspective, like she was younger, you know, growing up and being diagnosed with type one, and then, you know, thyroid and like, other stuffs come up since then, and you're always so busy as a parent, like trying to just ducks in an order figure out the best form of treatment, like the things that you can do, I don't think we take the time to see it from their perspective, like it's now it's another thing to be, another thing to do, another thing to forget, another thing to fail at, another thing to succeed with. It's a lot more than Oh, your thyroids mess that you just take this pill to the person taking the pill. It's a lot more than that. Yeah, that's what made me think to ask you, because it was the phrasing she used, like, a couple of times in my life. I thought, Oh, this must be it. And then she laughed. She goes. Now I realized, like, doesn't seem to matter. Like, as many things are going to happen as are going

Max 1:02:49
to happen. Life just keeps going, whether you like it or not.

Scott Benner 1:02:53
Life keeps life and right into you. Yeah, all right. Well, I mean, we're obviously calling this episode lighthouses and yeah. And I really appreciate you coming on and doing this with me again. Thank you. Yeah, of course, I love to come on every time you're awesome. Like, I'm gonna keep doing this just so I can track you. I want to see 10 years from now. You happy? Like, making that, yeah? Like, making the electrician money, and maybe somebody can finally explain to me why I can't get some of my lights working in the house. That'd be awesome. Yeah, I'll come. I'll come pay this. That would be awesome. All right, hold on one second for me. Thank you so much for doing this. Thank you.

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#1541 Paisley Park

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A 5-year-old with T1D and her life-saving, tail-wagging hero—meet Tracker, Paisley's diabetes alert dog.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends and welcome back to another episode of The Juicebox Podcast.

Shelby 0:15
I am Shelby Landreth. I am the mom to a five year old type one diabetes little girl named Paisley, and we are just riding this diabetes roller coaster one day at a time. If

Scott Benner 0:28
this is your first time listening to the Juicebox Podcast and you'd like to hear more, download Apple podcasts or Spotify, really, any audio app at all, look for the Juicebox Podcast and follow or subscribe, we put out new content every day that you'll enjoy. Want to learn more about your diabetes management. Go to Juicebox podcast.com. Up in the menu and look for bold beginnings, the diabetes Pro Tip series and much more. This podcast is full of collections and series of information that will help you to live better with insulin, nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan. The episode you're about to listen to was sponsored by touched by type one. Go check them out right now on Facebook, Instagram, and, of course, at touched by type one.org check out that Programs tab when you get to the website to see all the great things that they're doing for people living with type one diabetes, touched by type one.org Today's episode is sponsored by the tandem mobi system with control iq plus Technology, if you are looking for the only system with auto Bolus, multiple wear options and full control from your personal iPhone, you're looking for tandems, newest pump and algorithm, use my link to support the podcast, tandem diabetes.com/juicebox, check it out. I'm having an on body vibe alert. This episode of The Juicebox Podcast is sponsored by ever since 365 the only one year where CGM, that's one insertion and one CGM a year, one CGM one year, not every 10 or 14 days ever since cgm.com/juicebox

Shelby 2:20
I am Shelby Landreth. I am the mom to a five year old type one diabetes little girl named Paisley, and we are just riding this diabetes roller coaster one day at a time. Paisley, yes,

Scott Benner 2:33
oh, is that a there's no way that this is a prince reference, right?

Shelby 2:38
No, no. I fell in love with the name Paisley years and years ago, and whenever we were coming up with names for my daughter, my husband's middle name is Lee, and so it just kind of fit the whole family name type thing, Paisley.

Scott Benner 2:52
Oh, I like that. That's awesome. She was how old when she was diagnosed? She

Shelby 2:56
was three. Just turned three. It's just been a couple of years. Yeah, yeah, just a couple years in, it feels like it's been a lifetime. Though, any other kids? Yes, we have two other children. We have a one year old, her name is Everly, and then we have a 12 year old little boy whose name is Easton.

Scott Benner 3:15
Is this your second marriage? No, no, you just have a 12 year old and a five year old. Well,

Shelby 3:19
my 12 year old is my step son, okay? He is from a previous relationship of

Scott Benner 3:24
my husband. Got you that makes more sense, because I was like, yeah. I've said this to people before, but it nobody has a 12 as a 12 year old and is like, you know, five years later, like, you know, we should do,

Shelby 3:36
right, right? Well, he was, he was one of those children that was had at a very young age, yeah, so there was an obvious age gap there. Okay,

Scott Benner 3:43
you're a stepmom, damn. Or how long have you been with him his whole life? For how long since he was three? Wow. Okay, you probably don't think of yourself even as a stepmo. Then I would imagine most of the time

Shelby 3:55
it's all a team effort, right? It takes a village. I just

Scott Benner 3:58
heard Shelby say, sometimes it gets to the point where I go, Hey, I don't know if you remember or not, but yeah, why don't you get this one? Right?

Shelby 4:06
It's a juggling battle between all of us, especially at that age where they just start to get a little rebellious, that they start to really try to push their limits. It's just like, Who wants to take this

Scott Benner 4:19
one? Oh yeah. The male hormones are coming now you're gonna, oh yeah, this battle runs to like 20 Middle School. All of it, it's gonna be fun. Okay, so you have two little girls. Does your husband his family line, or you and your family line have other autoimmune issues? I

Shelby 4:35
have a grandmother who has an autoimmune disease. She has rheumatoid arthritis. But as far as diabetes go, there is no family history on either side. We have some non blood relatives on my mother's side that have a family line of type one, but they're not blood relatives.

Scott Benner 4:52
So your grandmother with the RA is the one who has something autoimmune, yeah. Okay, so then I get. You weren't looking for type one. So how did it present itself?

Shelby 5:02
It was the biggest whirlwind, not anything that we ever expected. Kind of hit itself. Honestly, I have a lot of medical background, and so I should have known the things to look for in hindsight. But you know that Mom Brain, medical brain, they don't work hand in hand. She had actually had an incident. We had just started gymnastics classes, and I was getting her ready for class, and she's like, I gotta go the bathroom. And I was like, Okay, we'll go to the bathroom. And she slipped and fell, and I didn't see her, you know, hit her head or anything like that. She kind of complained with her hip hurting and her arm. She ended up calming down like any three year old would. And we went off to class that day, and we came home, and about 10 o'clock that night, she started throwing up, and light sensitivity seemed like a concussion. So that was probably the first time I ever saw diabetes symptoms. But didn't know yet that it was diabetes. I took her to the ER and they're like, yeah, she's got a concussion. Here's a list of concussion symptoms to watch out for over the next few weeks. If you see these, don't really be alarmed. Scott, I don't know if you believe it or not, but 90% of those things on that list were type one diabetes signs and symptoms. So for two weeks, we were going, okay, she's got a concussion. That's why she's peeing out of pull ups left and right, and I'm having to change them two or three times in the middle of the night. That's why she's drinking so much. That's why she's confused enough to I remember vividly one day we were sitting on the couch, and she went to take a sip of her drink, and instead of putting it to her mouth, she literally just dumped it over her head. Oh my gosh. And I'm like, What are you doing? And she's like, I don't know. I don't know what I was doing. And I'm like, that's scary. Just

Scott Benner 6:41
super, super drawn to the idea of, like, I'm dehydrated, yeah, yeah.

Shelby 6:47
And I didn't really notice the whole losing weight or anything like that at the time, but like, two weeks later, she seemed like she was kind of starting to get over the whole concussion thing. And we had a family trip planned to Atlanta. We're big Braves fans, so we were going to watch a Braves game. We went out there for the day. She was like any other normal three year old. She was a little more tired, but I mean, what three year old that's thrown into an MLB ball game for the entire day is not going to take an extra nap? Okay? Totally fine. And then that night, we had gotten in really, really late. So of course, everybody's tired, and we got up the next morning to come home, and she didn't want to wake up. Okay? Like, I'm like, hey, you've got to get up. We've got to get dressed. And I'm setting her on the toilet, and she is falling asleep on the toilet, and she just starts saying things that don't really make any sense, like, just three words out of the air. And I'm like, What is going on? You know? This, this makes no sense. You're usually, like, the most verbal, well put together kid. And then I noticed she's super pale, and she just wanted to lay on the couch and basically not move. Like she looked like a sheet of paper that white. And I was just like, something's not right. So we thought, Well, maybe if we get some food in her, like, Let's go sit down, have some breakfast before we leave, maybe once we get her to eat and drink a little something, she'll perk up. Maybe she's just really worn out from the day before. And when I say, my kid loves to eat, Scott, this kid never missed a meal. Okay? This kid laid in the booth at the breakfast place that we went and did not move. She would not drink anything. She would not eat anything. She just laid there, and that's when I was like, I'm calling the pediatrician, because something's not right. And in my head, she had just fallen and gotten this concussion. So my mom brain starts saying, like, hey, what if? What if there was, like, some kind of, like, brain injury, or small brain bleed or something that got missed? This

Scott Benner 8:36
is what I'm wondering. Like, where did your mind go when she's out of it? She's babbling that kind of stuff. I thought she

Shelby 8:41
had some kind of, like, brain bleed or something that they missed, and it just took this long to, like, build up and cause a big problem. Interesting. You know, I call her pediatrician, and she's like, No, she definitely needs to go be seen as soon as possible. And I'm like, Well, we're five hours away from home. Like, do I take her here, or do I try to make it home? And they're like, you could try to make it home. And she she might be okay, but if you see any other symptoms, she needs to go the nearest er, we're like, okay, so we immediately load up to head home. And Scott, we didn't make it 10 minutes. We didn't make it 10 minutes down the road, and she started, it looked like the life was leaving her. She started throwing up in the backseat, couldn't hold her head up, and we took her straight to the ER and and I had smelled the ketones that morning when I took her to the bathroom, and I kept telling myself, my medical brain knows that smell, but I can't place it. I could not place it for anything. And we walked into the emergency room, and they saw her, and immediately took her straight to the back, like there was no sitting in the waiting room, no getting medical information, just straight to the back. And they asked, you know, had you been seeing? You know, more wet, you know more pain than usual. Have you been seeing, you know, headaches and all this? And I'm like, Well, yeah, she's had a contour. Contourion for two weeks. Of course, I've been seeing that that's all on my concussion list, and then they put her on a scale, and that's what really clicked for me. They put her on a scale, and they said she's 22 pounds.

Scott Benner 10:10
And how much? How much do you feel like she well, how much did she lose? She

Shelby 10:14
lost a 10th of her body weight. Yeah, for such a small

Scott Benner 10:17
person, that's a lot in two weeks.

Shelby 10:19
Yeah, two weeks before, when we were at the ER, they said she was 33 pounds, yeah,

Scott Benner 10:23
yeah. Jeez, that's crazy. Also, like, you know, kids gain weight, they just don't really lose weight at that age, yeah, normally,

Shelby 10:29
yeah. And not that fast. I said, your scales wrong. And they're like, No, it's not. And I'm like, No. Two weeks ago, she was 33 pounds, and they're like, oh no. And so I guess to them, they were already putting together the pieces, and they put us in a room. And I will never forget, within just a couple minutes, a doctor walks in, looks at my kid, who's just lifeless on the bed, and says, Can I smell your breath? And he leans down and smells her breath. And at that moment, I my medical brain finally kind of kicked in and overrode My Mom Brain. And I knew what he was doing. My heart just kind of sank, yeah, and because I knew at that point my all my pieces started to connect, I finally remembered that smell, and I knew what he was doing. And he looked he smelled her breath, and he looked at us, and he said, Your daughter is a type one diabetic, and she's in DKA like that. Yeah, he knew nothing of any of this. He didn't even hardly know what diabetes was at the time. And he looked at me and just gave me this puzzled look. And I looked at the doctor, and I said, Okay. I said, I'm not in denial. I said, I can accept that, because I know what she I it all clicks for me now, but I still want you to check her head make sure there's nothing going on, because that's that's what first came to my mind. And I know she had this concussion, which, in hindsight, was the fall. Probably all came from a low blood

Scott Benner 11:44
sugar. Did she just got woozy somehow and fell? Yeah,

Shelby 11:49
yeah. I think she may, you know, she may have had a blood sugar, low blood sugar, and stood up too fast and ended up falling. And nobody knew at the time. You know, we just thought she slipped on the floor.

Scott Benner 11:58
What's the time frame between? It's two weeks from the fall to the diagnosis, two weeks, yeah, two weeks prior to the fall. With hindsight, was there anything going on that you now see that? Oh, I do remember these other things. Or was the fall the first this episode of The Juicebox Podcast is sponsored by ever since 365 and just as the name says, it lasts for a full year, imagine for a second, a CGM with just one sensor placement and one warm up period every year. Imagine a sensor that has exceptional accuracy over that year and is actually the most accurate CGM in the low range that you can get. What if I told you that this sensor had no risk of falling off or being knocked off. That may seem too good to be true, but I'm not even done telling you about it, yet, the Eversense 365 has essentially no compression lows. It features incredibly gentle adhesive for its transmitter. You can take the transmitter off when you don't want to wear your CGM and put it right back on without having to waste a sensor or go through another warm up period. The app works with iOS and Android, even Apple Watch. You can manage your diabetes instead of your CGM with the ever since 365 learn more and get started today at ever since cgm.com/juicebox, one year, one CGM. This episode is sponsored by tandem Diabetes Care, and today I'm going to tell you about tandems, newest pump and algorithm, the tandem mobi system with control iq plus technology features auto Bolus which can cover missed meal boluses and help prevent hyperglycemia. It has a dedicated sleep activity setting and is controlled from your personal iPhone. Tandem will help you to check your benefits today through my link, tandem diabetes.com/juicebox, this is going to help you to get started with tandem, smallest pump yet that's powered by its best algorithm ever control iq plus technology helps to keep blood sugars in range by predicting glucose levels 30 minutes ahead, and it adjusts insulin accordingly. You can wear the tandem Moby in a number of ways. Wear it on body with a patch like adhesive sleeve that is sold separately. Clip it discreetly to your clothing or slip it into your pocket head. Now to my link, tandem diabetes.com/juicebox, to check out your benefits and get started today. I

Shelby 14:25
mean, I remember the the typical, like, all the constant having to pee, but, I mean, at three years old, they they always have to pee all the time. It's hard to tell Yeah, you know, like it didn't, it seems super over, overly much, but in hindsight, I mean, it probably was, you know, I mean, think about it, the last time I had a three year old was, you know, like, six years before, yeah, right, right. And I was the last time I had a three year old around. So I just thought, Well, man, she's just three years old and has a tiny bladder. Kid pees

Scott Benner 14:54
a lot. I actually have a puppy here that seems to have a tiny butter.

Shelby 14:58
I mean, she's drinking, she. Eating. She's growing. She's fine. And she was a very active kid. So it's not like she was just laying around the house sluggish. I mean, she was out running around, playing, not eating, nothing. Yeah, so nothing really struck me odd, until, until it all started to kind of set in, and she ended up in DK, and that's when everything started to click, and they checked her blood sugar, and it was like over 650 and at the time her a 1c was 11.7 and we got admitted into a hospital five hours from home with our little bitty girl.

Scott Benner 15:32
Did you have the baby at that point? Or were you pregnant? No,

Shelby 15:36
I did not have her yet. That was actually like, that was in October. That was I could have been pregnant and didn't know it okay, because I found out that I was pregnant Thanksgiving Day. She was diagnosed, October 2, so I was either it was either right before I got pregnant, or I could have possibly been pregnant and not known it yet.

Scott Benner 15:55
So what was that like? Just that shortly removed from the diagnosis, finding out you were pregnant, terrifying, I would imagine,

Shelby 16:03
absolutely terrifying. Prior to diagnosis, we were, you know, all on board. We were like, hey, you know, I think we're ready to have another one. And, you know, be able to give her somebody to play with and grow up with and all that kind of stuff. We knew we wanted more kids. And then just the time frame. So actually, what also got thrown on top of it was, I was scheduled to have an unknown mass cut out of my back. Oh, my God, around the same time. Yes, jeez, it was, yeah, I they, we had found a mask back in July. Didn't really know what it was. They didn't think it was anything, but you never know. And we were going on this trip to Atlanta, and we're supposed to come back and like, within that next week, I was supposed to have surgery to have the mass removed and find out, you know, what we were dealing with. What did that end up being? It ended up being the day after we got out of the hospital, we literally left Atlanta, drove home, slept a few hours, and I had surgery the following

Scott Benner 16:57
morning, and when they removed it, what did they find? Um, they found

Shelby 17:01
out it was some really rare like fibroma or something. It was nothing to be worried about. It was not cancerous or anything like that. It was just some kind of super weird, something that a doctor had never seen. How big was it? I don't know. I mean, it was like I had a knot, probably the size of, like, a quarter, okay, right in my back. It was causing some pain, but So thankfully, it ended up being nothing. But you have to remember, like we got trapped in Atlanta. We live in North Alabama, so we got trapped in Atlanta for three days. We were there three or four days trying to learn everything. Diabetes got thrown into this whole diagnosis. Our kid was just in DKA. We thought we were going to lose her, and we're trying to take in all this information. Have this tiny human that now we have to give shots to, and we have to give the right amount and not mess it up. And we come home, and the next morning, you know, I'm I'm going to find out what my fate is, yeah, and I had to tell my husband. I was like, I'm not going like, I'm not leaving her for any amount of time. He's like, I've got her. She'll be okay. It's just a couple of hours. It's an outpatient thing. You'll be home. I remember they took me back for surgery, and they put me in this room, and I just like, that's I had been strong for so long while we were in the hospital, taking it all in. But that's when I broke by yourself, in that room by myself. It was quiet, and I just that's when I started to process and kind of like grieve the whole situation. And they were like, are you so upset about your surgery? Are you that nervous? Do you want us to give you something? And I'm like, no, like, it has nothing. Yeah, I'm not

Scott Benner 18:31
nervous about the surgery, but I would take the something. What is the something you have? Actually,

Shelby 18:35
I told them no, like, no. I was like, I don't want anything. Like, I need to feel this, and I need to grieve this, and I need to have my moment. Because if I don't have my moment now, while I'm alone, when I leave here, I don't need these feelings to hit me on top of everything else, yeah, like, because I I have this tiny human that I have to be strong for.

Scott Benner 18:55
Yeah, yeah. Were you asleep for the surgery, or was it like a local anesthetic and they cut it out? No, no, I was, I was put under, you were under, okay, see, I'm just trying to imagine, I put myself back in, in the time of Arden's diagnosis. If you would have, like, asked me if I wanted to move our sofa to a different wall, I would have been like, that is too much to think about right now. And, you know, like, just to get this, you know, the mass removed, and then probably about the time that you're like, Oh, this is healed, somebody's like, You're pregnant. Like, awesome, yeah. It's

Shelby 19:23
like, okay, so now I have a kid that I'm still trying to learn how to keep alive, and now I'm going to go through pregnancy and they, you know, heat of the summer, still learning how to live this life. And now we're going to bring another one in. Yeah, no, I bet you that felt like a lot crazy, well, and it got even crazier, Scott, well, before

Scott Benner 19:40
you tell me that it got crazier, how are you managing the diabetes at that point? Is it MDI? Do you have a CGM Is it a pump like, what are you doing

Shelby 19:46
there? MDI until Christmas. Okay, so she was diagnosed in October. We were MDI until just before Christmas, we got on the Omnipod five.

Scott Benner 19:57
Okay, all right, so pretty quickly do a nice algorithm. That helps you, and you've got a CGM, that's great. What do you mean? It gets crazier after that. Did the dog, like, start talking? What happened?

Shelby 20:07
So for almost, almost, you're pretty close.

Scott Benner 20:09
Listen, if I'm pretty close, actually,

Shelby 20:12
like, when you talk about CGM, I wouldn't I refuse to leave the hospital without a prescription for a CGM. Good. They didn't want to give me one because they're like, We don't want to stress you out and you to freak out need to freak out over high blood sugars. Like, that's going to be normal. And I'm like, No, I'm not leaving

Scott Benner 20:26
without one. Wait, how did you know that? How did you know to say that?

Shelby 20:29
Like I said, I have some some distant relatives that are not blood relatives, that are type one. And so she was my first call after I kind of had a minute to process and get her settled in the hospital. I was like, Hey, your son, you know, you have type one diabetes. Your son has type one diabetes. And he was diagnosed. Little like, what am I supposed to do? Like, I'm alone in this whole new world, and I don't know what to do. And she was like, first off, you need to calm down,

Scott Benner 20:54
Shelby. How come ladies are allowed to tell each other to calm down, but when I tell a lady to calm down, it all goes wrong. How's that possible?

Shelby 21:00
Well, because this was one of those people that knew what I was going through, and she did this whenever there, when her son was diagnosed, like there were no CGM, there were no pumps, like she did this the old school way. I'm

Scott Benner 21:14
just going to tell you that when I tell my wife to calm down, I know what's going on too, and it doesn't

Shelby 21:19
seem to matter. So yeah, she's like, you gotta calm down and, you know, it's going to be okay. Like this. This is not like, yes, this was really, really bad, and it's a blessing that it got caught when it did, but it's uphill from here. You know, there's a lot to learn, but you know, I'm here for you, we're going to get through it. And you know, she's like, You need to ask for a Dexcom, you know, before you leave, so that you can know what her blood sugars are, because she's so little and can't really tell you, you know, how she feels and what's going on. And they were like, well, you're not going to find a pharmacy that has one. I said, Well, I got a five hour ride home. I'll find one between here and there. I'll find one somewhere. Yeah, and I did, and I did. I found one before I made it home. What were

Scott Benner 22:01
you calling ahead? As you were driving, I was calling ahead,

Shelby 22:04
and I thankfully one one in our hometown already had one. And so like I was already getting all the prescriptions sent to the pharmacy, everything ready, so that as soon as we got into town, we could pick everything up, nice, which was also a reality check whenever I leave a three day hospital stay, and then come home to pick up my newly diagnosed daughter's prescriptions, and they tell me it's over $1,000 to keep my kid alive.

Scott Benner 22:28
Listen, if you bought food at a at a Braves game, you you must have some money.

Shelby 22:33
So, yeah, it was definitely a like, whoa, hold on, what's going

Scott Benner 22:37
on? I mean, listen, I made fun, but it's a pretty goddamn big shock when you start seeing the bills, and you know what I mean, it's like, Whoa. What's happening? How come? And I love the first the first January you're out of pocket resets, and you're paying, like, cash for everything, and it's all in the first month. And then people are like, Oh, how long does it take you to meet your deductible? I'm like, like, a week and a half. Like, how long does it take to take you?

Shelby 22:59
That's the first question you ask if you ever have to change insurances, what's that deductible? Because that's what I'm gonna hit that what's

Scott Benner 23:06
my out of pocket? Because basically that's how much money I need in January. That's how I always think about it. Because, you know, you order, you order pumps, or CGM or so other supplies, and it's all just like, you're like, okay, here. And then, it's terrible. Go ahead, I'm sorry, but

Shelby 23:23
yeah, so you asked how it got crazier? Yeah, so we got through diagnosis. We got through that Christmas and coming up on summer, you know, we had heard about diabetic alert dogs. PAISLEY had been watching it. You know, what do we do whenever we have this new diagnosis in today's world where social media is so accessible, you go there to learn, you're like, hey, I don't know what to do, so let me go to social media and see what all these other people are doing. Or how do I fix this, that and the other and Juicebox was amazing for us back then, that literally got us through so much. But Tiktok became a big thing for us too, and Paisley started finding this community very quickly, and diagnosis of other kids on Tiktok because she just didn't have kids here. So it started off with her like, Hey, I see them giving their own injections, and I see them putting on pump sites. And it became an outlet for her to make videos and post them so that other people could see her doing it. Yeah, but it became a bargaining tool of like, Hey, I will put on this device if you'll record it and put it on Tiktok for me, okay? And literally, two weeks after diagnosis, she was three years old, giving her own insulin injections because she was like, I can do this. I see all these other people I can do this. So Tiktok kind of became a thing that we were going to to learn. And she found about about service dogs. And she's like, Mom, I really want a service dog. And I'm like, I know you would love, I would love for you to have a service dog, because blood sugars of 30 while you're upstairs, bouncing around and have no idea, you know. And if Dexcom is wrong, those are scary. It'd be nice to have a dog around to let me know. That kind of thing you. But I mean the cost, they're just so expensive. And where do you even start? You know, I think that's everybody's thing. It's just, where do you even start that journey? And my husband, we run a plumbing company, I

Scott Benner 25:10
want to agree with you. You've taken a big risk, because, you know, there's companies that probably do a great job, there's companies that probably do a terrible job with, you know, training service dogs. There's probably companies that aren't certified that are out there trying to take people's money. I've seen wildly different versions of the cost of these animals, yep, you know. And I've had people on that have trained their own dog, and I'm like, Well, you know, so you took the dog you had in your house and trained them. And I'm sure every dog is not right for it, and the training is not easy, but it's a weird thing to think, like somebody might ask you for $15,000 for something that, like another person was like, oh, yeah, I did that myself. Like, it's, it's a very wide, I guess, list of possibilities. And how do you know where to jump in? And, I mean, what if you don't have that money? And and you decide, like, this is a thing we really, really need. So anyway, I'm sorry you were starting to say you have a plumbing company.

Shelby 26:04
Yeah. So this is, that's exactly kind of where I was at. Was like, I mean, this would be amazing for you and for our family, and, you know, I definitely think it's something worth setting up, maybe a five year plan for, because obviously that cost is just not something that anybody can just really say, Here you go, and there's a lot of research, and a lot of people have wait lists, and, like you said, trying to find the right company that's going to get you exactly what you want for your money. And, you know, finding a company that's going to give you a dog that's going to work. I mean, there's a lot of stories out there of, you know, service dog dropouts. You know, they didn't make it

Scott Benner 26:39
really like you like you bought a service dog, and your blood sugar gets on it looks at you and goes, I'm not involved in this. God.

Shelby 26:45
I actually have a very good friend of mine who started her service dog journey, ended up with a dog who was a washout. He he did not perform up to par, and she ended up doing the journey all over again. And now she has, she did it with another company, and now has an amazing service dog, but she

Scott Benner 27:03
doesn't have that money from the first time. Yeah,

Shelby 27:07
no, does not have that money. Still has the pet. He is now like a house pet, and he loves his life as a house pet, but, yeah, I mean, it happens.

Scott Benner 27:17
I guess got to be frustrated. I listen. I love my dog, but if you told me my dog was absolutely 100% going to percent gonna do a thing and then I got it, I'd look at it every day and go, like, yeah, he don't do that thing. They said it was gonna be hard to swallow. I'm walking around here with a $300 dog that I paid $15,000 for.

Shelby 27:35
Yeah, yeah. I still, I mean, she has some incredible stories to tell, but so that was kind of my thing. Was like, let's put it on a five year plan. Okay, you know what happens when you do things like that? Scott,

Scott Benner 27:46
I mean, listen, I'm very segmented person. If I had a five year plan, it would take me five years to do it. But what happened to you? I'm guessing that you use that energy of I'll find the CGM on the way home and move things up a little

Shelby 27:58
bit. It It wasn't me, it wasn't me. It was a it was it was one of these things that was known to be very needed and very helpful for us. And I, when I say this, I mean it's so quite literally, that doors just started opening for us. It was like, Hey, here's your thing for today. Here's the door open, walk through it and see what happens next. And it was just like, God just started opening one door after the next. And the process set up

Scott Benner 28:29
so fast. Opportunities started popping up, things that you were like, if I do this, it'll get us there quicker.

Shelby 28:34
Well, so my why was going to say we own a plumbing company, and my husband, ironically, just went out on a job to fix somebody's kitchen sink. And they were so thankful to have him come out and fix that sink. And she tells me, to this day, and he got out there and got to talking to him, and they had a truck in the driveway that said dog training elite. And they were telling him, you know, yeah, we train dogs, this, that and the other. And he's like, Oh, that's cool. And then they mentioned that they had a service dog themselves. And he's like, Oh, that's awesome. You know, my daughter's a type one diabetic, and we've really thought about getting a service dog. And they're like, well, guess what? You're in luck. We train service dog. He's like, you do? Can you train like a diabetic alert dog? And they're like, yeah, absolutely. And there became our new best friends. So they're like, yeah, let's get you the number to our you know, if you you can bring your own dog, if you have one. And we're like, yeah, the dog we have is not, nowhere near equipped.

Scott Benner 29:22
Not happening. The one we have doesn't seem interested. But thank you.

Shelby 29:26
Not even no he was. He was a mess, to say the least, the

Scott Benner 29:32
pet you had previously, yeah,

Shelby 29:33
he was, he was one of those that would probably run out the door and you were worried what was going to happen next. You know, he would never like physically hurt someone, but he would definitely make them think so. So public access would have been no option.

Scott Benner 29:46
I don't know if my blood sugar is low or if this dog wants to rip my arm off. I can't seem to tell Right, right. Okay, so not a good option. That dog

Shelby 29:53
not a good option. So they're like, we can put you in touch with a breeder that we know that we've used several times and so. I called her, and she's like, Yeah, but we just had a litter not too long ago, and we're gonna skip this litter that we would normally have. So it'll probably be, like, a year, year and a half before we have another litter. And I'm like, Okay, well, you know, that's not terrible. You know, that gives us some time to, like, figure out financially, what we're going to do, fundraising, that kind of thing. And you know, you still got some time after you get the actual puppy, before things start really ramping up. And so I'm like, All right, well, let's, let's plan on that. Well, I get a call in about six weeks. Hey, so remember that litter we weren't going to have? Well, she accidentally got pregnant, so now we're going to have a litter now, and we're not going to have the litter in a year. We're going to have to skip so either you get your puppy now or it's going to be, like, a lot longer before you get a puppy. And so we were faced with this, like, do we go ahead at the time I'm six months pregnant, we're talking about bringing home a puppy while I have a type one, and I will have a, like, one

Scott Benner 31:03
two month old, yeah? No, puppies are a lot of work too, yeah?

Shelby 31:07
Well, not just a puppy, but a service dog, Puppy, okay, we went a very with us, having a local trainer. It's a very non traditional route, because this was not going to be send the puppy off to be trained, and it magically comes back working. This was going to be, you know, they come in. It was a lot cheaper, but they would be coming in, like once a week, working with us, seeing the progress, kind of telling us what steps next. And then I'm doing all of the training work outside of that, during the week with the puppy. So essentially, I'm doing 80% of the work on top of my newborn and my type one. I thought when

Scott Benner 31:40
you said, they said, the dog got pregnant by mistake, you were going to say, Yeah, me too, but yeah.

Shelby 31:48
So I was like, I don't know about this. I was like, and not to mention, we haven't even started fundraising. Like, where are we going to come up with this cost?

Scott Benner 31:54
How much was the what was the number? It was about 15,000 Wow. I was guessing I was on. Yeah, you

Shelby 32:01
were spot on. Now, I mean, a lot of the dogs that kind of come back already trained for a thing. I mean, you're looking at a little bit more, but with us doing a lot of the work with them, we loved that. Because, for one the dog trip to the dog tracker is his name, he was bonding with Paisley from the day he came home, and like they were working that bond and that teamwork from day one. And I love that aspect, because it's just hard for me to comprehend, like getting a dog that's, you know, one two years old, and then bringing it into your household with this immense job and responsibility, without having that long term bond. I

Scott Benner 32:36
want to ask a question. So like, Yeah, I've been Where you've been like, I've been, like, with a newly diagnosed young person. I know how scary it is, like, I'm with you all the way. Yeah, if you would have told me that I had to pay $15,000 for anything, I wouldn't have been able to come up with it, and I would have balked at the number, especially if you are not a person who's like, oh, sure, I'll just take that out of the $15,000 box I have over here. Like, so if you don't have that box of money, what is it that drives you to believe that that, like, I mean, that's got to be $15,000 I would imagine, is a pretty large percentage of your yearly income. So like, What makes you think like, this has to happen? Is it fear? Are you just afraid the fact so many

Shelby 33:16
doors had already opened for us was just like, we're gonna we're gonna make this happen like this, many doors has opened. It's obviously part of, you know, God's plan for us to to get started on this. So let's just see where it goes. The trainers kind of knew that the timeline had gotten sped up, and they're like, Hey, we can work with you payment wise, like, versus paying everything in full. You know, as we go through training, we can work with you on the payment scale, and that made us feel a little more comfortable. But we just hit the ground running fundraising. I mean, I was calling businesses trying to get businesses to sponsor. What's

Scott Benner 33:49
the onus for them? Like, when you call a business up and you're like, hey, my kid wants a dog that can tell her when she's getting her blood sugar low, why don't you throw $500 into that? For me, what did they get out of that? So

Shelby 34:01
a lot of businesses, depending on, you know, kind of how their businesses are set up and whatnot, they can get us a tax write off for charity donations like that. We actually also partnered with a non profit that's local to us, okay? That does some fundraising and stuff for diabetic alert dogs too. So essentially, when businesses wanted to donate even small, small or large sums, if they they kind of did it through them, then they were, they were given a piece of paper that said, Here's your tax write off for the year, where you can claim this as a tax deduction. You know, charity. So then they're not

Scott Benner 34:34
donating it. Actually the money to you. They're donating to the charity. The charity is buying you the dog.

Shelby 34:39
They were handing the money to the trainer. Yeah, right. They were giving the money over to them. But we started making t shirt. I learned. I ordered, I made my own t shirt design, and then ordered the prints online and bought, like, $100 heat press on Amazon. And we started selling T shirts, really. And I sold, I don't know how many T shirts I made during that time. And I didn't think it would really go anywhere, but it did. I mean, the word just kind of got passed around, and it just little by little, things started to add up. We had someone locally that had reached out to me who got a lot of, like, football memorabilia stuff that they they were part of, like, a big Facebook page that auctions that kind of stuff off, and they gave me a ton of items, and we're like, here you can do whatever you want with them. Just use the money to help pay for her

Scott Benner 35:26
dog. Oh, wow. Turned into a community effort, really. So

Shelby 35:30
this is where it turns into community. I knew of someone who was also in my state on tick tock. Their name was rags Party of Five. They I had messaged him and was like, Hey, y'all do a lot of Alabama stuff. Is there any way maybe you could help me kind of auction this stuff off? And let me tell you, those are two of the most amazing human beings I have ever met. He's like, I'm going to do one better. I'm going to help you auction this stuff off. But like, we want to do more. So they started setting up all kinds of things, and they helped. They used their platform on Tiktok and raised, like, over, I don't even know how much money it was off the top of my head anymore, but it was like, over $5,000 Wow, that. Then it was just people on Tiktok that would see their little fundraisers, like Super Bowl boards and stuff, and they're like, hey, you know, I'll buy a spot on the board, or I don't want a spot on the board, I just want to help. Here's a donation. And all these people we didn't even know all over Tiktok just started to donate to our cause. And next thing we know, you know, we started fundraising in October, and by February, this dog was fully funded. It

Scott Benner 36:36
was paid for. Let me ask you a difficult question to answer. Maybe now you've had the dog for how long

Shelby 36:41
we have had him, a year and a half,

Scott Benner 36:45
okay, and you've had a CGM the entire time, yes, did you need the dog? Yes? Why? What happens? Tracker

Shelby 36:52
has made so many life saving alerts. I can't even begin to tell you one of the MO The biggest ones was a few, a few months ago, we were out at a baton class, and her blood sugar looked like it was trending up and kind of right on that borderline up high and right where her pump would be giving automated insulin. And I and he came to alert me, and I asked him, so not all service dogs are trained, so let me be very clear, Tracker is kind of from what I can have learned, one of the few most dogs are just trained to give you an alert, like they call it. You say, hey, there's a problem with blood sugar, and then it's kind of on you to check and see if they're telling you, you know, what way it might be trending. But we actually train tracker to tell us, not only that, there's a problem, but whether her blood sugar is going high or if it's going low. Okay? He can actually differentiate the two. And so while her CGM was saying she was going high, which is normal for that activity, he came to me and said, No, her blood sugar is low, but the like the activity and the CGM, they kind of match up to normal. I'll check on her. So she finished up. A few minutes later, I checked on her. Well, her pump was dumping insulin into her because they thought that she was high, and her blood sugar was actually, you know, in the 6070, range, okay, and had it not been for him, I wouldn't have thought anything of it, because that was normal for our

Scott Benner 38:14
situation. What was the when you said, Hi, what do you mean high?

Shelby 38:17
His range is to alert anywhere from anywhere below 80, and anything above 180 she was kind of on that, like 190 range on the CGM,

Scott Benner 38:25
yeah, I wasn't asking about that. Where the dog alert I was? I was talking about what do you think of as a high blood sugar? Because you just said high. So you so her blood sugar was around on the CGM, like 190 or so. Yeah,

Shelby 38:35
190 200 the alert would be given that insulin, yeah,

Scott Benner 38:39
he alerts low, and then you check a blood sugar, and what do you get, like a 60 or something like that? Yeah,

Shelby 38:44
I got like a low 7060, blood sugar, and she had like over a unit on board at the time. How

Scott Benner 38:51
did she feel? Did she is that a thing like, do you think she would have told you she felt low?

Shelby 38:55
Hey, so that's a big thing that we love about having tracker, is she does not feel her highs and lows. Okay? She has to be very high for a very long time, and she will notice that she goes to the bathroom frequently. But she doesn't feel like all the effects that some other people, I've heard feel from a high and from a low. She won't feel a low until it's like low 50s,

Scott Benner 39:18
okay? Then she's dizzy. Yeah, she'll

Shelby 39:20
say she's dizzy or she just doesn't feel good. But for her, not being able to feel that and track her beats technology by 3045, minutes. He's ahead of the curve. Way ahead. Yeah, that's pretty awesome. Way ahead. So, like, he will come to me, like, this morning he came to me and said, Hey, her blood sugar is going low, and I looked at her CGM, and it said 112 with, like, the diagonal arrow down. And I was like. I was like, yeah, we'll watch it, because that's what we tell him. If it's not at that threshold that he alerts to, we'll say, Hey, we're going to watch it, and we'll kind of set a timer and come back in and check in with him, because we want to make sure it hits that. Threshold. So we're not, like, rewarding does the dog have a snooze button? He does not. He will come back and tell you again. Oh, because

Scott Benner 40:06
what do you mean? Like, I tell him we're gonna watch it. Yeah. So if he alerts

Shelby 40:09
and, like, her blood sugar, if we finger stick her and it hasn't hit the threshold of 80 on the low end, then we don't want to reward him for, like, a blood sugar that's higher than his threshold. So we'll say, Hey, this is an early alert. You're letting me know early because you smell it coming. We're going to wait till it hits that number before we reward it, because otherwise, in a dog's mind, hey, I got that treat early, and I really was kind of smelling this smell too. So let me start alerting earlier and earlier, and it becomes less about the number and on the treats and more about the treat and the reinforcement as early as you can get it. So we really try to wait till he hits that threshold. We'll say, hey, we'll watch it. And then if it gets to that threshold before 15 minutes, he's already back at you, saying, hey, check again. Like 10 minutes can go by and he hit that threshold, and he's like, Hey, letting you know you should recheck now. Or if he gets really aggravated because he's like, Hey, I'm being persistent, he will bring you the bag with the glucometer and basically throw it at you and say, Hey, check it now, listen,

Scott Benner 41:12
I really want this treat, and I think I'm right about this, so let's get going. Yeah, and he's

Shelby 41:16
not wrong. Yeah, he's not wrong. That's awesome. He is a huge asset. And while it was so much work, and still is work, that's what I tell anybody that says, like, Hey, I've thought about a service dog. I say you need to be ready for the work, because it doesn't stop just because they're trained and they come home and they just work, yeah? Like, it is an everyday task, constant training, really forever. You know, you're always working on different skills. Tracker can actually take juice boxes to Paisley. So if she gets low and if, like, they, you know, if she was older and she I wasn't around, and she's out on her own, he could go get the juice box and bring it

Scott Benner 41:50
to her. Tell me, is she in school yet she is kindergarten

Shelby 41:53
age, and she should be in kindergarten, but we home this year. Specifically, our choice was based off of, you know, sickness. PAISLEY is not a type one that handles sickness very well, so we wanted to keep her home for that, and we wanted to give her and track her more time to work together all the time. So fun fact you don't know about me is, prior to Paisley's diagnosis, I actually ran my own online education business where I homeschool children kindergarten through second grade, all over the world, over, like, online, yeah, online. I taught kids all over the world, yeah.

Scott Benner 42:29
So I, that's what I was wondering, like, because at some point, that's the next step in this question for me, which is, like, I mean, what's the trade off? Is she going to be in school with a service dog sitting next to her. Yeah? Yeah.

Shelby 42:42
That's, that's the goal. But the key is, she has to be old enough to be fully responsible as a handler for him. And you have to think, I mean, you're only five, six years old, it's gonna be a while. It's gonna take a little while,

Scott Benner 42:56
yeah? So, like, I'm playing devil's advocate here. But like, is there a worry that, you know that's going to make her so different that it's it's going to draw attention she doesn't want, actually,

Shelby 43:06
she she's very attached to tracker. I could see where some kids, maybe that's how they feel. But for her, he's her security blanket, like he knows if she starts feeling bad, he's there. He's she knows that he's always going to tell her. So this is kind of where it brings in some independence. I know I put that in my little list of things to talk about. Is since we've had tracker, and since we have, like, switched insulin pump systems, and Paisley has been at home with me homeschooling. Our big homeschool thing was more of just like we can do the work, but when she goes to school, I not only want her, it's not about just taking the dog, because lots of kids have service dogs that go to school and they don't take their dog. So it's not just about the dog being there to watch and help. But I may be in different spot, but I don't trust a school 100% to be able to do the job that I do. That takes 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Yeah, when they have 600 kids, and that might just be me being a mom with anxiety, but Well, I

Scott Benner 44:08
don't disagree with you that you're going to do a better job than somebody else is going to. I just wonder, like, at what point in life will it be unreasonable to do this, and do you set her up? Listen, I don't know if this is right or not. I'm just talking right. But like, do you see you set her up to feel like, without this animal, I'm screwed. Most people who have type one diabetes don't have a service dog. I'll have one. Yeah, yeah, so and they're fine. So that's like, you know what I mean? I

Shelby 44:34
love that question, Scott. I love it. I do. So actually, with her being at home this year, our goal was just to work on them, but also to make her more comfortable with her diabetes. I noticed when she got diagnosed, she got she became very clean, like, I can't leave my mom because I'm diabetic. What if something happened? Like she wouldn't even go to a neighbor's house to go play with a friend unless I went with her. Where did she get that idea from? She. Always been a clingy child, even before diabetes, and I think it just made it worse, knowing, like, hey, bad things can happen just because, like, she knows, hey, you have to treat this low blood sugar or, Hey, you know, I don't know it was just one of the things that she had, but now that she's been home this year, I have seen the biggest spark I think I've ever seen. This child generally loves to learn about diabetes.

Scott Benner 45:24
So you feel like she's got a comfort level from the dog that's helping her embrace things, yeah, so

Shelby 45:30
having the dog around, you know, to kind of let her know things, I think that has been huge. But I think being at home and being able to be involved in her diabetes care, you know, and I think I know this is a huge kind of seesaw, okay, well,

Scott Benner 45:44
no, she's getting older, it makes sense.

Shelby 45:47
But she's getting older, but she's high, she's five, yeah, you know, like your eight, nine year old, you know, you're kind of used to the Hey, you might take on a little responsibility, but at five years old, that's a lot to ask. I mean, you're still learning how to write your name and count? Well,

Scott Benner 46:01
let me say this. I mean, I saw that with Arden, so I think maybe it's the diabetes. It Fast forward to a little bit, because Arden was two when she was diagnosed, like, just two, and by the time she was five, you know, you would have thought she was 10, by the way, she was handling things. Think that might be common, like, I think it's awesome that she's there, but I don't think

Shelby 46:19
that it's not as common as it's what, like, a lot of the people I've connected to are like, I couldn't imagine my five year old doing that. I wish they would. And I'm like, is it really that rare? I

Scott Benner 46:30
just think it's the way you talk about things. So like, wherever you get the confidence from, like, whether it's from the confidence that the tracker is there, right, or if it's me saying things like, you're fine, it'll be fine. This is just what we do, like treating it very like, matter of factly, so that it's not like, Oh no, I have diabetes. I'm going to get like, like, Oh, it's okay. You got low. We'll take care of it, like, that kind of stuff,

Shelby 46:51
you know, we'll fix it. What do you think you need? So a lot of our conversations ended up, you know, we kind of hit that brick wall that I'm sure everybody hits, where it's like, life's not fair. Diabetes sucks. I want this peanut butter jelly sandwich, and I want it now, and I don't want to wait 15 minutes, because who else in the world has to wait 15 minutes, you know? And it kind of becomes like this head butted situation, and we, we decided to handle that by, like, including her in it, like, hey, every now and then, let's let you make your own choice, you know. Here is why I say this might not be the best decision as a meal right now. Like, if you want this, then we should Pre Bolus and wait, because if you don't wait, this might happen, and you know, it may make you feel this way, or it might influence your decisions on what kind of snacks you might can have later. You know, you might have to choose free snacks later versus choosing another. You know, carb heavy snack. And so we started kind of proposing things like that to her, and she started to learn more, like, Hey, Mom and Dad aren't just being mean, like, there's actually a science to this and a reason to this. And now she she does everything like she she gives her own insulin, she counts her own carbs. Obviously, I oversee these things, but she does them on her own, independently. That's awesome. She'll get her own snack, count her own carbs, give her own insulin. You know, she has got gained the independence that where she used to not go outside without me. She comes in the door and says, Hey, Mom, I'm going down the street, you know the drill. Give me my phone, my glucometer and a low snack, and I'm going three houses down. I'll call you if I need you. That's great. That's awesome. It's been hard as a parent to try to let go to some of that like I thought I was going to straight up have a heart attack the first night she came in to me, and we've been working for six months on, you know, hey, this is how you enter, you know, carbs into your pump. You know, we count them. Here's where we read for them. Here's how we count. She's been doing this masterfully for months. And then one night she comes in and she says, Hey, Mom, can you open this? And I said, What is it? And she's like, a yogurt smoothie. And I was like, Yeah, but you, you know, you're like, 150 you probably need some insulin for that. She goes, Oh, that's okay, Mom, I already gave myself insulin. It's awesome. And I about paint. I was like, I'm going to paint. I'm like, You gave yourself insulin? And she's like, Yeah, it's like, well, how many carbs was it? Because, like, I know, but I'm gonna see if you know. She's like, it's five carbs. I read the label. I put five carbs in my pump, and I gave myself insulin. I literally just need you to open it. And I'm like, Uh oh, okay, that's terrific. Can I double check behind you? Like, and she did. She did everything flawlessly. And she's like, here,

Scott Benner 49:23
did you double check it in front of her?

Shelby 49:26
Yeah, yeah, I double check. I'm like, Hey, can I double check? Usually, in our house, like, during the day, if I'm like, close by, she'll be like, Hey, Mom, can I have these goldfish? And I'm like, Yeah, sure. How many carbs is it? And I know because, I mean, we eat this stuff all the time. And she'll tell me, and I'll say, okay, yeah, go ahead. And she'll put the numbers in, and she'll generally show it to me and be like, Hey, am I good? Like, can I go ahead, right? Or I'll say, go ahead and do it. And then I'll walk over when I finish, you know, whatever I'm doing, and double check just to be sure, because the Moby does have, we have swapped Moby, and it does have, you know that that Max Bolus limit that the pumps have, you know, she can. Get more than this much at one time. So worst case scenario, if I were to double check it, then we might just need a couple extra carbs. Well,

Scott Benner 50:07
let me just say this, for people listening, whether you want an Omnipod five or a tandem Moby, there are links in the show notes to the podcast player where you can get that from. So there we go. Let me just slip that in

Shelby 50:16
here. Oh yes, we love our Moby. We swapped Moby in September, and it has been game changer for us.

Scott Benner 50:22
I'm glad whenever, whenever anybody finds a thing that works for them, I think it's awesome. And yep,

Shelby 50:27
that's what I say you I we went to friends for life last year in Orlando, that big diabetes conference, and that was the biggest thing that I heard them say, it's find the pump that works for you. And that's kind of what gave us the confidence to try the switch from Omnipod to Moby, and you know, it was great for us. And I tell people all the time, I'm like, find what works for you. If you're on a pump, and you hear all these other people say, Well, this pumps great if your pumps working for you and you like it, like, don't feel like you just have to switch, because everybody else is switching. Like, it's all about finding what works best for you and your body. Yep,

Scott Benner 51:00
I agree. Yeah. Whatever it is, it's awesome. Arden's been wearing an Omnipod since she was four, maybe. And I had a conversation with somebody last night, and I said, Yeah, I don't think Arden would wear that one. We talked about why, and that person was from a company that, you know, makes the pump. And they're like, No, I understand that. Yeah. I just, I really think it's about what's best and, and what's best is a lot of different. There's a lot of different boxes to check. It's not just about one thing, or it's a lot maybe pieces, yeah, for sure. Well, okay, so I understand the process and, and how you got the dog and what happened, and that you're happy with it, and everything like that. Can I ask about, like, long term. Like, dogs don't live forever. So like, like, how do you plan for that? Like, do you think there'll be a world where I'm not trying to age your dog? I don't know how what your dog is, but 1012, whatever, years from now, she's, you know, how old will she be? Seven to 1017, like, 18, something like that. Like, she'll be older. Yeah, she probably about college age. Right around college age, what if she says, That's cool, I need another dog, and now the dogs are 20,000 or she says, I don't want a dog. Like, how are you going to handle either of those situations?

Shelby 52:11
That's a really good question. I definitely think it's something that you have to kind of consider when you bring in this lifelong best friend to the situation, is they're not going to live forever. So one thing that I loved about our program is obviously, like we learned with him, we were doing so much of the hands on training with him. Honestly, if we needed to do it all over again, I could probably retrain a dog myself. Gotcha, if we knew that it was her desire, because service dogs are a lot of responsibility. They take a lot of time. And I mean, you got to think about it. You're taking a dog everywhere you go. So if she was at a point in her life where she felt like, Hey, maybe I want one to be at home, but maybe not go everywhere, or maybe I don't want one, it would really be her decision. At that point. She's old enough that she knows how much she relies on it that if she wanted another one,

Scott Benner 52:58
you say that. Now when she says, Mom, I'm gonna go from Alabama to San Diego to go to college, you're gonna be like, I'm gonna be duct taping a dog to your face, by the way, like, you know. So yeah, it's gonna be interesting, trust me, it's a wild ride. Definitely will be

Shelby 53:13
interesting. But if we knew that she was gonna need it, or she was in a situation where she wanted one other one, I think we would just retrain. I think we would, when we got to the point to retire him, we would start retraining another one. That way it would be ready to go when needed. But if she decided she didn't want one, then that's obviously not something we would force, force on her, or anything like that. Because, I mean, she'd be into her young adulthood. I mean, that that would be her responsibility to take care of day in and day out. I'm

Scott Benner 53:41
gonna try to stay alive for 12 more years so I can hear what happens when that happens. I want Shelby back on the podcast

Shelby 53:47
very I don't know if you will, if you've ever seen our tick tocks, but if you ever watch them, you will see she's a very opinionated little little girl,

Scott Benner 53:56
just telling you, I want Shelby back on episode 7000 where she's like the kid told me she didn't want a dog, and I cried, and then she said No, still. Or she said she wanted it I couldn't afford, like, I can't wait to see

Shelby 54:07
what happened. Or, by the way, the dog, okay, Mom, I'm divorcing the dog. Or maybe the

Scott Benner 54:11
algorithms get so good, or maybe there's a dual chamber pump that has glucagon in it by then. Or, who knows, you know what I mean, yeah. But Liz, I love that you found something.

Shelby 54:19
How far Tech has come in, the last you know, 1520 years. There's no telling. There could be a cure by then. For all we know, you know

Scott Benner 54:26
to talk about technology is 15 years out. It's not even that far out. Like, look how far it's come in five years. Seriously, you know. And now they're all in this arms race with their algorithms. So you got to think that each company has an algorithm that has its strong points and its weak points, and they're all going to try to make them better and better and better, to compete with each other because they don't. I mean, stop and think about the process of selling something to somebody the amount of effort and time it goes into creating a customer, even right like a patient who says, I want to try. Your thing, you want to keep them once you have them, so the way you keep them is by giving them the outcomes that they're looking for. And so I think that any company who is making an algorithm right now that delivers insulin whose, you know, main focus isn't on making it better, I think they'd be making a mistake. From what I can tell, they're all trying to make them better. So there's a lot of effort going into that. I think that's just good for us. It's good for people. Yeah, I think so too. Yeah. I like them battling with each other a little bit. It's good, you know? It keeps everybody honest. Keeps everybody on their toes. It keeps you from sitting back and going, Oh, we have the only thing they got to buy it. We don't have to innovate, you know what? I mean, that kind of thing. So it's good. It's good times. It keeps

Shelby 55:40
improvements too. I mean, look at the Dexcom new direct watch. I mean, for us, that's a huge, huge feature, because, you know, Paisley trying to have a five year old carrier on a phone all the time and keep it within 20 feet and not set it down and walk away, especially if she's like, leaving the house,

Scott Benner 55:58
it's hard. Yeah, no, I know she's responsible

Shelby 56:01
enough to wear a watch. And you know, when it goes off, say, Oh, my blood sugar is low. Let me eat something, or let me call mom. Or hey, my blood sugar's high. That's what she did the other day. She had her phone in her bag, saw it go high on her watch. And get this, she called me and said, Hey, Mom, my blood sugar just went high. Do I need to give a correction and I said, Yes. And she was five houses down at the neighbor's house, she FaceTimed me, shared her screen with me so that I could double check what she was doing, and gave her own correction Bolus from down the street. Yeah,

Scott Benner 56:34
no, I'm five years old. I mean, listen, my kid knew how to use a cell phone before most people had cell phones, and it's helped her in a lot of ways. I mean, I also think that, you know, I'd love it if they weren't around technology as much. But if you made me pick, I choose. I choose this. I think it's fantastic. Yeah,

Shelby 56:50
same house, five houses down that the dog went when it snowed and let me know her blood sugar was low from five houses away.

Scott Benner 56:56
Jeez, I don't understand how you're a Braves fan if you live in Alabama, my husband's

Shelby 57:01
always been a brave son. I was never a huge baseball fan until I met my husband. And we have a we have a minor league, minor league team locally that we do go to all the time. Yeah,

Scott Benner 57:12
I have to say, I'm going to say this very begrudgingly, as a lifelong Philadelphia Phillies fan, but the Braves put on, oh no, hold on. Let me tell you, the Braves put on a hell of a show at that stadium. They do. I've been to a game there, and it's fun. So it's amazing.

Shelby 57:28
Yeah, I hate to say that we went to a couple of playoff games one year the World Series year, we went to a couple of playoff games, and my husband was dying to go to a World Series game like he he was almost ready to spend big money that we didn't have at the time to try to go to a World Series game.

Scott Benner 57:47
And did he go? No, he didn't.

Shelby 57:51
I know, because it became a if you go, I need to go. And then if we're going to go, shouldn't we take our kids too? Because it could be like a once in a lifetime experience, and then the dollar signs just kept adding up. And yeah, it was the thing we decided not not to do.

Scott Benner 58:07
So one day, I went online, and I was like, Hey, I'm trying to find inexpensive World Series tickets to take my son to the World Series, right? And I figured, like, I know people online. Like, I must know somebody that works for one of these teams. Like, let me finally use this podcast for something valuable for myself. I found people like, hey, my boyfriend's neighbor owns a piece of the I forget what it was like, like, seriously, like, the piece of the other team, let me see. Like, hey. People were like, all over the place trying to figure out, didn't and then everybody was so nice and tried, it just didn't pan out. So I went back to the thread, and I said, Listen, I want to thank everybody. Let's stop looking now. It's not going to work out. You know, the game's like, in two days and but I appreciate all you guys. Is really cool. And some person said, Well, no, I'm going to donate. Like, I don't know what they said. I'm like, I'm gonna throw $20 in so you can buy this ticket for your kid. And I was like, listen, like, first of all, don't do that. I was like, Please, don't do that. I tried so hard for it not to happen. And then I woke up the next day to, like, a couple of $1,000 and people were like, now, go to the World Series. They were like, Thank you for the podcast. Go to the World Series. Like a lot of people threw in, like, a couple of

Shelby 59:15
survey. Y'all listen the podcast. Y'all get all of us diabetics through so

Scott Benner 59:19
much. Shelby, I get paid by I'm okay, like, you know what I mean? Like, it

Shelby 59:23
doesn't matter if you get paid. Like, I mean, let's be honest. I mean, it

Scott Benner 59:27
was an amount of money I was uncomfortable with, like, accepting from people, but like, you know, now they gave it to me. I'm like, I can't give it back. I have to use it. This got out of hand quickly. I was just looking for an in like, You mean, like, I was just looking for a guy that knew a guy. You weren't

Shelby 59:41
looking for the money to get there. You were just looking for the tickets. I just

Scott Benner 59:44
needed somebody to show me which way to like, look, you know what I mean? And so anyway, so we went to this game. Both of us were just a couple of weeks out of having kicked COVID, but we were like, we're okay. Like, it's okay, but, oh, man, by the time the game was over, I looked at but. We both looked like we used up every ounce of energy that the world had for us like to because that was maybe the most exhilarating thing I'd ever done in my life, has been in a World Series game, and they lost, and it didn't matter. It was insane. So that

Shelby 1:00:13
was the thing. My husband did not want to spend the money and then end up losing the game. He's like, if I spent that much money for World Series tickets and then we lost that game that I went to, I would be so infuriated that I would I would be, I would regret spending every bit of money. Yeah, I tried very hard not

Scott Benner 1:00:28
to think about that, because there was an amount of money we put into. It wasn't all from everybody, you know what I mean. And the truth is, if you're a baseball fan, there was something about that game. Every pitch felt like so important that you were just on an adrenaline ride for three hours. It was insane. Didn't matter if you were in the field or if they were in the field, every pitch felt like the end of the game. Like, I've been to a lot of baseball games in my life. There's a lot of pitches just like, go, oh, it's, you know, it's three, oh, this is going to be a strike, and nobody's going to swing, you know, to mean, like, like, that kind of, that kind of stuff. Nothing felt like that. Everything felt life or death. It was awesome. But, you know, anyway,

Shelby 1:01:05
that gives me chills. I do hope that we can go at some point.

Scott Benner 1:01:09
Yeah, well, listen, I was just at a regular old, you know, regular season game between the Phillies and the Braves in Atlanta. And I'm telling you that game was just, it was incredible, like the lights and the music, and it was awesome. It was really Yeah, and people were lovely. Was really great. Actually,

Shelby 1:01:26
yeah, it is great. We actually went one time. My husband had thought that he was 18 years old and was going to go out and play basketball again with some buddies, and tore his knee up really bad. Was on crutches. I was like, nine months pregnant, eight, nine months pregnant at the time in the middle of July heat, and he decided to just get tickets. He's like, You know what? If I can't go to work because I'm hurt, I might as well be sitting in Atlanta watching a baseball game. That's a guy, that's a guy, like, upper level tickets for not super expensive. And was like, we're going. And I was like, Okay, fine, we're going. So we all load up and go, and then we get there and realize, I realized the seats that he bought. And I'm like, you can't climb the stairs to get to the seat. How you gonna get up there? But, yeah, I'm like, how are you gonna get up there? So here I am. He's on crutches. I'm like, eight months pregnant, dying in the heat, and I ended up convincing someone in the like accessibility seats to like, can we please just sit here like nobody's sitting here. It's like, halfway through the game, and I desperately need to sit down, and we can't even reach the seat. We bought dummy

Scott Benner 1:02:34
over here. Thought he was going to climb to the top of the stadium.

Shelby 1:02:39
That was like, please. They did. They did end up giving us some seeds, but very cool. Yeah, it's a great experience, and our kids love it. I do usually kind of have like this anxiety, since we love going to Atlanta, but every time we go that being where we went into DKA, I get I still have a part of me that always has anxiety about going back to that particular place, really, I don't, I think I always will.

Scott Benner 1:03:04
Oh, I hope you shake it at some point. I mean, it would be nice not to feel that way. I

Shelby 1:03:08
mean, it's not like the crippling kind of like I have to obsess over everything, yeah, while we're there. I mean, I go there and every now and then Paisley, it's a big thing in Dippin Dots. And it's like, hey, we nailed that. Dipping dots while we were here. That's a win. Cool. You know, it's not always going to be the way that it was that one time I had

Scott Benner 1:03:25
some popcorn chicken from KFC the day my appendix burst and it I'm not a huge I wasn't a huge KFC person to begin with. But like, you know, a number of years later, I'm not lying to you, a number of years later, we found ourselves like, hey, we need some food. There's a KFC. I went in there, the smell hit me, and I was like, I can't be here. It scared the hell out of me. I was like, Yeah, dude, because I thought, by the way, the KFC didn't give me appendicitis, but, like, it was close enough to itself that I was like, I just made that. I drew that parallel in my head. I couldn't deal with it. All right, Shelby, this was awesome. Do you have anything else that we should have talked about that we didn't

Shelby 1:03:58
I can't think of it. I know a lot of people might probably hear this podcast and think about looking into service dogs. I think the only thing I may not have said is that dog training elite, the company that we did use to Train Tracker, is a national franchise. So if there's any listeners out there that are listening to this and starting to look into service dogs, or even, like the fundraising side. I know Dylan dogs for diabetes that we use as the nonprofit to kind of help with our fundraising. They work with people all over and dog training Elite has locations all over the United States, okay? And from me, you can probably find one in your area, yes.

Scott Benner 1:04:38
And let me offer the alternative view. Get a CGM and put a Juicebox in your pocket there. You're fine. I think there are ways to manage that. There's nothing wrong with you having a service dog, obviously. But like, yeah, it's very doable without as well. Yeah, there's a

Shelby 1:04:51
lot out there, and it could be, I mean, we would still be doing our life today without one. Yeah, absolutely, a little bit easier sometimes. Yes. Yeah, does he help out with different things? 100% Yeah. But you know it's, it's one of those tools that, you know, it's, it's worth it for some people to have, especially when they're so little and they can't kind of tell you as much. It becomes like a security for me, too, as a parent, to know, like, hey, if she can't tell me something, and I believe you know that Dexcom is off, or she's five houses down at the neighbor's house, and her Dexcom quits reading, and I haven't noticed it yet. Well, he's gonna let me know and take me down there and let me know that, hey, she's still not fine, even though she's five houses away. Yeah, it's a lifestyle choice, and it's something some people like to do, and some people, you know, it's not even on their list.

Scott Benner 1:05:36
100% believe it. And I do think lifestyle is a good way to put it, because it really, I mean, listen, Libre is not going to on your floor, and

Shelby 1:05:45
you don't have to go and feed it and water it and bathe it and train it and buy 500 million different dog treats for it to feed it. Yeah, you know, it's

Scott Benner 1:05:53
not a responsibility, like, like an animal is, yep, it's, you know, it's funny, because I think, more more than anything, that's the part that gets me, because I feel such an incredible responsibility to living things, like, down to pets, very small like, I almost, like, don't make me responsible for something else's life. Is almost how it makes me feel. I tell

Shelby 1:06:11
people I have four kids, because I said, I say I have four kids. One of them just has four legs, yeah. Also one

Scott Benner 1:06:16
of them is your husband, because he bought those baseball tickets when he was on crutches. And I mean, really, that is not, it's not a well thought out decision. All right, that's fine. I understand I'd go to a baseball game. So anyway, okay, well, Shelby, Listen, before we started recording, you said to me, I talk a lot, so run me over if you have to. So I just want to point out, because I did run you over a couple of times, that Shelby told me to do that. So before you all send me an email, you didn't let her talk. If I didn't do what I did, oh no, if I didn't do what I did, here's what would have happened. Shelby would have said, Hey, my name is Shelby Landreth, and then you never would have heard me again. So like,

Shelby 1:06:56
forewarned you, Scott. I forewarned you tells me I have to have like, a code word in certain situations, especially when it comes to talking about diabetes. And he he, like, when we go to conferences and stuff, he'll be like, hey, you know that thing that you do? You're doing it again. Yeah,

Scott Benner 1:07:13
okay. Well, no, listen, you were awesome. I very much enjoyed this. I thought you did a great job of telling your story. I really appreciate it. So thank you so much. Well, thank you for having me. Oh, it's a pleasure. Hold on one second for me. Okay.

Head now to tandem diabetes.com/juicebox and check out today's sponsor tandem diabetes care. I think you're going to find exactly what you're looking for at that link, including a way to sign up and get started with the tandem mobi system. I'd like to thank the Eversense 365 for sponsoring this episode of The Juicebox Podcast, and remind you that if you want the only sensor that gets inserted once a year and not every 14 days you want the ever since CGM, ever since cgm.com/juicebox, one year one CGM. This episode was sponsored by touched by type one. I want you to go find them on Facebook, Instagram, and give them a follow, and then head to touched by type one.org where you're going to learn all about their programs and resources for people with type one diabetes.

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