Scott Benner 9/4/21 Scott Benner 9/4/21

#536 Twinning with Rachel

Rachel is a D-mom, a therapist and a fun person to talk with.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends, and welcome to Episode 536 of the Juicebox Podcast.

On today's show, I'll be speaking with Rachel, Rachel is a therapist. She's also the mother of a few children, one of whom has type one diabetes, and is a twin. Please remember, while you're listening that nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice, medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your health care plan, or becoming bold with insulin.

There's no better day than today to start with the diabetes pro tip episodes. They begin at Episode 210 and are also available at Juicebox. Podcast calm and diabetes pro tip calm. Are you newly diagnosed or don't understand some of the terms that you're hearing on the podcast? Check out the defining diabetes series, also available at Juicebox Podcast Comm. And in your podcast player, I also have episodes about algorithm based pumping. And after dark topics, check them out, go go visit the website Juicebox podcast.com.

This episode of The Juicebox Podcast is sponsored by touched by type one, check them out at touched by type one.org. When you get there, you're going to find a wonderful organization whose mission is to elevate awareness of type one diabetes, raise funds to find a cure and inspire those with diabetes to thrive, touched by type one.org. The episode is also sponsored by the Contour Next One blood glucose meter. You can learn more at Contour Next one.com forward slash juicebox. Let's how you that this is my first time using a different computer setup. So I okay, I have a high level of concern at the moment. Okay, I was about to ask you. If I was about to say something like you know, when you've done something a million times, but you're still not sure if it's gonna be okay. And like why would I say to somebody who has diabetes or even understand? No, I've never felt that way. Yeah, I just like a silly question to ask. Have you ever thought help? But anyway, it seems like it's working, which is really cool. I'm going to take a split second to check your voice on the recording. So I also have like a mic, like an actual mic that I could set up don't mean to do that. You sound really good.

Okay, if I sound good, then I will not mess with technology on my end either. Like, we'll just make it worse, or it'll or it'll sound better. And but it'll take 20 minutes, and it won't

Rachel 3:01
exactly know I don't trust that if I hook up this mic that like I won't have to like download drivers and whatever. So

Scott Benner 3:08
yeah, let me guess give me a half. I'll be here. But you sound great. This is recording. I win. Every great. I did it. I am. So you're the first person to benefit from this. Let me tell you about this kind of interesting. So I share about the T one D exchange on the podcast, which is a an organization that I think does really cool stuff. And they have a difficult time as everyone does getting someone to follow through on, you know, filling out a survey. So it's all it is is a survey. So every time I've done it, I'm almost positive that I have done it. Well, thank you. Because every time someone uses my link for the survey, I make some money. Oh, nice, lovely. It's a T one d exchange.org. forward slash juice box. I just realized I'm leaving this part in the episode. But anyway, I was able to use the money I made recently to buy a dedicated computer to record the show on. So that was really cool. Because it I've been doing the whole thing on one computer and it the hard drive fills up and then the computer slows down and it gets difficult. So this is a big deal. And I appreciate everybody who filled out the survey at the end exchange. And this is

Rachel 4:26
so honored that I get to be the first person on this computer.

Scott Benner 4:29
You are the first one exactly right. Why don't you introduce yourself and then we'll start talking.

Rachel 4:35
Yeah, I'm Rachel Gibson, and I'm a clinical social worker that works in private practice and a mom of a kid with T one D and we are about a year and a half into our diabetes journey. I hate that I said journey. I really don't like that but it came out I also have two other kids. So my my type one diabetic kid is a twin. So I've got a non diabetic twin and then an older kid who older one is 10. And the twins are eight. Yeah. Wow,

Scott Benner 5:16
very nice. Did you just not want to say journey? Because it sounds it's so kind of like,

Rachel 5:20
Yeah, I don't like when therapists say journey. It's like when we call messed up situations, opportunities, these are just things that I try to avoid as a therapist.

Scott Benner 5:33
So yes, the car fell on your house, then your house fell on you. But this is just an opportunity for you to dig deep like Shut up.

Rachel 5:40
Amazing growth opportunity you've just been presented with on your journey.

Scott Benner 5:45
You think people say that? Because what else are you gonna say? Other than Wow, totally bad luck that your car and your house fell on you? That really sucks. That's what I say, as a therapist. I'm like, that sucks. Yeah, I got I have no upside. There's a number of times while recording the show that I just say that because it seems like the most honest response.

Rachel 6:04
It's the most validating to me, why would you I don't, I am a big proponent of not trying to move too quickly to any sort of meaning or bright side or positivity. Like that will happen naturally from the person. But if it's externally applied, like if I as an outside person come in and say, but at least you know, you're at least you, you know, didn't get a, you know, you didn't break any bones, you just got a life altering brain injury, that's incredibly invalidating and frustrating. And now you're not allowed to have any negative feelings. You know, I

Scott Benner 6:42
yeah, I have to tell you that I completely agree. And I've, if you've listened through this whole podcast, which by the way, it's, you're probably recording what'll end up being like Episode 570, or something like that. But I mean, I'm up to 500 ish now out. And I genuinely believe that you can't say to somebody, well, at least it wasn't this because it kind of, although it's a very real response, like I've had the thought myself hearing response. Yeah, but it doesn't, but it it can do under the surface, what you just said, which is kind of minimize what diabetes is. Right? And diabetes is hard. And everyone's experience with anything by this is gonna sound New Agey, but everyone's experience with everything is theirs, and you can't judge it or read it or put it into a category like it is what it is, if the worst thing that's ever happened to you is diabetes. Well, that's the worst thing that's ever happened to you.

Rachel 7:44
Yeah. And it can still suck. I mean, the thing is that there will always be people who are suffering more and suffering less. And there's no fairness. I mean, that's my, I think people could have an argument with me, but my feeling is, you know, it's it, there's not fairness or justice about the individual struggles that we each have, it just happens. And when you're the one struggling, it always sucks. And I don't find it very helpful. Nor do I recommend it to other people to compare yourself to people who might be suffering more, because you can have empathy for them and recognize the depth of their suffering. But that doesn't make your suffering, feel any better, at least to me, it's like, no, everyone has their own suffering, I think it's, I find it more helpful to sort of join in the human experience of suffering and recognize that we're all doing the best we can. And sometimes it's helpful to just be with others who are feeling like life is hard, as well.

Scott Benner 8:46
Yeah. Do you think that it's fairly common and maybe even normal for people to do that, though, to seek out someone who's in their eyes not doing as well as they are so that it makes them feel like they're succeeding?

Rachel 9:00
I mean, I sure I think it's, you know, comparing yourself to other people is very, very human. And, like, it's also very human to, you know, recognize that it feels good when you're coming out on top of that comparison. Yeah. And it's okay for that. I mean, I, my, you know, therapeutic philosophy is, it's, it's good to notice all of the thoughts and feelings that you're having, including ones that you don't necessarily like, you know, and then you know, feeling open to all thoughts and feelings that come with it. So my, you know, if I were in therapist mode, my next question would be, well, what is going on for you that you need to help yourself feel better? Like what why why do you need that comparison for you to feel better? What is that giving you and what are you not getting that makes you need that extra validation, you know, like, there's always more to it. But I think it's good to be curious about

Scott Benner 10:01
why aren't you enough? Yeah, exactly. Interesting. All right, Rachel, listen, I did my best thinking on my end. I can't figure out how, why we booked you on the show. So can you?

Rachel 10:14
Yeah, it was, um, to lean into, like this mental health side, and a little bit of siblings experience with type one, in that I've got this interesting situation with a twin. So we've got these like, little justice, they want everything equal, and then one gets diabetes. And that equality gets blown out, blown out of the water. So that was one of the things that we had talked about in terms of leaning into the mental health aspect of type one along with sibling dynamics. All right, well, that sounds are you happy? you booked me? Oh, no,

Scott Benner 10:54
I am. Trust me in the moment, I was like, this is the right thing to do. I just really am by myself over here. So I totally get it. It would be nice. If I could send an email to someone and be like, Hi, Rachel is coming on this morning. Just remind me what we're doing again. And then I looked at my notes, and I actually changed one of the intake questions so that I could see it more easily. But you signed up before that could happen. So I'm not embarrassed. I really am not like if I recorded one of these a month, and I couldn't remember then I'd be like, Oh my god, I'm an idiot. But you're the third one I've done this week so far. So that's Yeah, that's wild. And I'm more than happy to tell you why I'm here. So how long ago was was the diagnosis?

Rachel 11:41
The diagnosis was in January of 2020. So it's been about a year and a half. Okay. All right.

Scott Benner 11:46
That's pretty soon and you're saying that? So digging into the the idea of twins, are they I don't imagine this doesn't matter whether they are fraternal, or are they identical, um, boy girl. So fraternal definitely not identical, then I see. If you would have said, it's a boy and a girl, I could have made that decision on my own, but not a lot of but I get asked that a lot, though, you'd be surprised that I'm very proud to say I could have figured that out. Well done. So there's this kind of feeling like this happens with siblings to begin with, I have, right now a 21 year old and an almost 17 year old. And they both I think always have an underlying feeling that the other ones being treated better or more fairly or differently. And it's impossible for them to see that they're, they're individuals, and that they all don't have the exact same situations, they don't need the same responses. They have different, you know, ways of thinking, and so we pair them differently, you know, but when they're twins, does that ramp it up?

Rachel 12:52
It ramps it up. So we, you know, we have the twins and we have an older so we kind of have this kind of comparison, all kids are like the equality police. So that's it's a pretty universal parenting experience. But for me, and you know, when I've talked to other multiple moms, it does get it's more intense between them, and they really monitor the equality of each other more than they monitor it with the older kid. I think partly because they, you know, being the same age, they should have the exact same privileges the exact same, you know, time special time spent with parents, and they they keep track of everything.

Scott Benner 13:33
Yeah, it's, uh, do you see it? I mean, this is not for you, for your kids, or you even professionally. But isn't it weird when you see it with adults? when they're in their 30s? And their 40s? They're like, Mom likes him better. And you're like, Oh, my God, like, let it go. Let it go. It's time to move on. What is this about exactly? Like, why are you think you're raising your own children? Now you're still worried that your sister gets a bigger piece of Turkey on Thanksgiving, like Calm down, get that I know.

Rachel 14:03
But what I'll say with empathy is, you know, a lot of people snap back into their childhood stuff when they're with their family of origin. Like it's pretty funny to see like, when you, you know, when you're watching a family of adult children, and all of a sudden you're seeing the sibling dynamics play out as if they were younger. It's it's pretty funny. Humans are funny.

Scott Benner 14:23
Yeah, no kidding. Do you think? Do you think it's important? Alright, so there's an interesting question. If I if, if it was an absolute, and you could only do one or the other. Would you say that adults going back to visit with family in a big setting like that should definitely happen or never happened? If you had to pick one? Are you asking me if adults should go like spend time with their family? Like, you know, like, you know, Lion just walks away from its cubs at one point. It's like, that's it. You know, I think I would definitely say let's continue the relationships and yeah, right. So there's nothing like harmful that comes from it. It's just really funny to watch everybody turn back into like eight, five and nine.

Rachel 15:02
It's it's a mute fruit fruit for relatively healthy family. It's pretty amusing. Kind of, isn't it? Yeah.

Scott Benner 15:10
I can actually still hear my what my wife talking about, like they wouldn't watch the TV show I watched or like something or you know, my parents didn't like my gymnastics, but they like my sister soccer.

Rachel 15:23
Yeah, I'm not going to give specifics because they might listen to it. But yeah, this I can see it happen with my husband's, you can ever see it with your own family, you know, because, like you're in it, so you don't know what you're doing. But I see it when my when we go back to my husband's family and all the kids are there. It's just really funny. But you can. Again, I'm not going to give specifics, but yeah,

Scott Benner 15:46
your husband's family's a mess. I hear what you're saying now. So. No, no, I what I was gonna say for real is that one of the kind of joys of being married once you can get over feeling like someone's picking on your family, is you finally get an outside perspective from someone you trust? It is so true. Yeah. Yeah. Because but in the beginning, when I was younger, I'd be like, Why is she like, like, like, Why does she see them like that? You know what I mean? Like I've written the past in my head, I guess for the things that you're used to what you're used to, you know, super interesting. Okay. Alright, so these kids. Alright, I guess we should find out real quick. Like, how was the How was your child diagnosed? What was it like DK or you just saw?

Rachel 16:26
No, it was actually it was we were I feel really fortunate. We never hit DK. It was wetting the bed for like a week. We just saw weird stuff. She was wetting the bed. She was drinking like a fish just just sort of strange. And I had googled. So I knew that this could be diabetes, but I also just assumed that I was being kind of paranoid and jumping to the worst case scenario. But that being said, after one night where she had wet the bed twice, and you know, she hadn't been wetting the bed for years. I went to the doctor with her and I was like, You know what, I? I'm sure that I'm being ridiculous, but can we just check this out? And they were like, I also am sure that you're being ridiculous, but let's do this. And we got sent straight to the ER, and her blood sugar's were at, I think, eight like over 800 to 900. Somewhere in there. Wow. That's pretty, pretty high. But she was happy as could be. And I mean, luckily, we, you know, we didn't have any major medical complications. We just stayed in the hospital getting her blood sugar's down, and you know, getting the crash course and what to do. Well,

Scott Benner 17:39
hey, you want to hear something interesting. That's completely off topic. Yes. Fish don't actually drink water down through their mouth. But obviously, they need water. Like all living things need to live. They generally absorb it through their skin. It's called osmosis. Same way. hormones and nutrients are absorbed into our blood.

Rachel 17:58
So as I said, that phrase, I was like, What a dumb phrase. But I decided not to interrupt myself.

Scott Benner 18:04
No, no, I said,

Rachel 18:05
I had the same thought. Actually, as it came out of my mouth. I was like, that's what a weird phrase. Anyway, because I was like,

Scott Benner 18:13
I think she made that up. I'm not certain. I

Rachel 18:17
think it's a phrase, but I could be wrong. It could be that I like made it up. Or like kind of like Ricky Ricardo did some sort of, like common phrase and put it together with another one. I don't know. I'm sure your viewers can tell us.

Scott Benner 18:29
I've heard a fish to water. Not a different phrase. Yeah. But it has nothing to do with actually being thirsty.

Rachel 18:36
Yeah, no, that's that's like when you just pick something up really easily.

Scott Benner 18:39
Yeah. Yeah. We should go through all the things have the word fish in it.

Rachel 18:45
I could keep going. I've got like the feminists, like, you know, men, like fish needs a bicycle. So I mean, we could keep going with this, but we should probably refocus.

Scott Benner 18:54
We should. I don't know like a fish needs advice. I get that. Okay. All right. That's good. Don't Yeah, it's probably true. Like it you. Listen, you're not divorced, right. poor husband. He says, What is he just like a like a? Pause, right? Just a classic feminist quote that I did have on my wall during college. I'm sure that just drew all the boys in. I went to a women's college. I was not about drawing and the boy. It's great. It's wonderful. Okay, so you get the diagnosis. It's only a year and a half ago. Yeah. Do you leave with any kind of technology?

Rachel 19:34
No. And I had to just ignore everybody to get the technology because they, the doctors were saying, we probably wouldn't get a Dexcom until, I mean, like six months and probably not a pump for a year. And I asked why. And they were like, Well, you know, insurance. They like to make sure that everything's stable first. And I just basically I just thought That was so stupid. And so I just independently got everyone's approval. And then, like made it happen. Yeah, I just ignored that. So we had a ducks calm about two months in, I want to say and then a pump about like four or five months in.

Scott Benner 20:17
I believe that all that is bull that Yeah, the times and you know it has to be this long you have to have this number. I think if you have insurance, you can push it through if your insurance covers it,

Rachel 20:30
you just have what I did. I just said like, I basically just call the insurance and said, Hey, the doctor wants a duck's comment, a pump, how do we do it? Exactly. And then I call the doctor and I said the insurance is willing to cover it. How do we do it? And I

Scott Benner 20:45
said, look like an old timey movie. You're like, I'll just do a little Mr. Action over here.

Rachel 20:50
I'll just say everyone approves and make them talk and then it worked. So I feel great about it. I

Scott Benner 20:55
feel like you took a towel, hold it over the phone. You're like, Hello, this is Rachel. For her daughter. Rachel can't come to school today. She's sick.

Rachel 21:07
Yes, it was classic Mr. action, and I recommend everybody do it. Because because it was stupid. Like why? Why would we not going to ducks calm? Especially? I mean, that's just it. You know, it's just it's wonderful technology, they and we should leave the hospital with it.

Scott Benner 21:22
I once called Arden's aren't my insurance company, like six days in a row. And finally, on the sixth day, you could hear in the person's voice, they were like, I am going to spend all day today making sure this happens so that you do not fall back tomorrow. I mean, that's how you get it done. Yeah, I actually used the phrase. Listen, I'm a stay at home Dad, I have very little else to do. I love it. I love the threat of just being a nuisance. I want to stay focused on this just perfect. Excellent. So you don't get home with anything particular. Was it a surprise? Is there any other type one in the family or other autoimmune?

Rachel 22:00
It was definitely a surprise. We, my maternal grandfather was diagnosed with type one very late in life. So like in his 50s or 60s, he was diagnosed. So you know, I had that exposure, but it really never, that's the only person with type one that we can identify. And we can't really identify much of an auto mute. So it was definitely a surprise that was not, you know, all the things that you worry about as a parent type one was not really on my radar.

Scott Benner 22:31
How about that? That's cool. interesting to hear. Because everyone has I think it's all kind of, you know, everybody thinks there's a rule once they see something, you know, they don't think of it as maybe just random. But, you know, obviously, there's type one in your family if your maternal grandfather had it. That's that. Like, you know, I interviewed somebody recently who was diagnosed at like, seven and so was their father. And you could see how at while I was talking to her, I was like, tell me the truth when your kid was like seven years old, were you just staring thinking like, this? Is it get on me? It's gonna happen right now. We're like, your father dies of a heart attack at an age and people have that very bad age in your mind. Yeah. Like, this is what I'm gonna live to get to. That's our sort of, I mean, meaningless, right?

Rachel 23:19
Well, I mean, I think it's just we carry it with us. But in terms of I mean, I think the mistake that we make that we can often make is that it making it fact don't even mean like it because what those are, those are feelings. Those are fears. Those are, like milestones, but they're not. I don't it doesn't actually make anything happen. You know what I mean? Like it's, but it can feel predictive almost.

Scott Benner 23:45
So tell me what you do for a living therapist. Practice or

Rachel 23:51
private practice, and I kind of I work with at my specialties are millennials and families and then specifically, I work with a lot of gender expansive kids, so kids that are exploring gender or transgender.

Scott Benner 24:07
I have to ask, why is millennials a category?

Rachel 24:10
I just love them. I'm an old millennial. So I was born in 82. So I'm like the oldest millennial that you can be. And Millennials are so much fun in therapy because they tend to see it more as an ongoing practice, like going to the gym and getting regular checkups, which just leads to adapt. And, like an exploration that is just sort of fun. As a therapist, I just really enjoy that population.

Scott Benner 24:41
It's not like that timeline has like a real like leather fetish or something like that. They didn't have something specific. It was no gotcha. They see the process. I can understand that that would be I would think more fulfilling for you.

Rachel 24:56
Yeah, it's it's really just sort of like they're fun. They're they tend to Be very, like long term committed to mental health. And that's it's fun to work with people who really care about self improvement and learning about themselves as a practice of general health. It's just fun.

Scott Benner 25:14
So you're saying to other therapists, if you've got bills, you want to get those, you know, Millennials do not make enough money to be funny. They are not the cash cow here. I know. Very, very dialed into the process, but chase him around for $5 constantly. Yeah,

Rachel 25:35
no, it's that's that's one of the things they're stressed about. So yeah, no, they're definitely not the money makers, but they are very committed,

Unknown Speaker 25:43
committed and broke. Well, in a nutshell.

Scott Benner 25:49
That's interesting. So they came up at a time where they got over educated, and there's not work to Yeah, I say,

Rachel 25:56
and also kind of promised this like prosperity but isn't really available. Um, yeah, it's it's kind of stuff.

Scott Benner 26:05
Yeah, I can see that to where that feeling of just go to college and things will be okay. Exactly. I'm gonna do a vibe, when the truth is always going to be that the early bird gets the worm. Like, what? You got to go out there and fight a little harder, try a little more do do extra. And if you're not willing to do that, the ascensions probably not there unless you dumb luck into something. But yeah,

Rachel 26:32
but I'll also say that the I would say that even with hard like, that is true, you do need those things. And you can do those things and still not get, you know, get anywhere. And so that's what's tough is that just trying to figure out, it tends to be that like, other general older generation, say, you know, hey, hit the pavement. Get out, get out there. And that's not been the experience for a lot of millennials is like, No, but I did that. And I'm still struggling. I'm still in like, an entry level job. Yeah. So anyway, that's it's it's, it's definitely a complicated, like transitional generation.

Scott Benner 27:08
Right. I wonder if the older people who say just work hard, and it works out. They had such lower expectations. Right, like, they just wanted a house. Yeah, they weren't looking to be fulfilled, they didn't have any expectation of what like,

Rachel 27:24
I think that's, that is definitely there's a big aspect of that, but even like having a house now I'm in LA. So having a house having a house here, it's kind of, it's a lot. But, um, but yeah, but like, even sort of more humble dreams. Like, you know, owning a home that you can afford with a full time job is not always in reach for some of the younger generations. I mean, things have changed a lot. And just the amount of debt that you acquire going to college is really different from previous generations. So it's easy.

Scott Benner 27:57
No, it's Yeah, it really is. Okay, so how does your profession lend itself to parenting? Or does it not help? As much as you might think,

Rachel 28:09
oh, it helps far less than I wish were true. And my husband will often I mean, I literally teach parenting classes, and my husband will look at me sometimes and say, like, aren't you an expert in this? Like, I don't know what to do? Um, um, yeah, it never translates well, to your own life. But I think what it does do is I have the ability to kind of like, recognize two different answers, like might the answer that I'm doing, that's probably good enough, but not great. And then the more ideal answer that I can strive for, and that can definitely help when I feel really stuck with parenting

Scott Benner 28:49
is that then the disconnect is between knowing what to do and not being so emotional that you can't get to it?

Rachel 28:57
I mean, that's the disconnect for everybody, right? Like most of us know what we're supposed to do, like, Hey, stop yelling at your kids, right? But it's surprisingly hard to stop yelling at your kids, when they're driving you crazy.

Scott Benner 29:10
Yeah. Why do I have to give Rachel my $40 copay when I know I shouldn't be doing this. But the answer is that I can't You can't stop yourself for some reason. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Interesting. Do most people want to be better? Or not? These are bad words, but I don't have a good word for it. Like do most people want to be good people or there's some people you just meet that are like, where does that become a mental illness like that? So

Rachel 29:37
I think I think there's a that's a complicated question. I actually think that moment, at least, you know, my clients and the people in my life, I think that they are good people and want to be better people and want to keep that in mind. Um, so I do think that there's like an inherent goodness with certain exceptions to most people and Think that often the work that people do on themselves they've put off for a long time, because they think it's not that important or that it's more important to focus on others. But it's, it turns into that kind of like, put the oxygen mask on yourself first. And I mean, I think that's definitely true. And when you get a serious diagnosis like diabetes in your family, it's like, you do have to take care of yourself deal with your own stuff. Because you've got a marathon in front of you, and you, you have to be available and present in order to, you know, run the marathon.

Scott Benner 30:39
What about our wiring? Like, do you think about that, when you're talking to people like I, from my perspective, I've been alive a while I pay attention to things that are going around, you know, with myself and my family and people that I mean, and I think that when you're young, that desire to protect everybody provide for everybody is so overwhelming, and to make babies like, I know, we think of it differently, like, it's our sexuality, or I want to be like, you know, but really, like, you're just like, I have got to eat and have sex. Like, that's kind of you don't think it but you don't I mean, like, it's your drive and, and for, you know, very maternal women, it could very easily just be like, I need to have a baby. Now I have a baby, I need to take care of this baby, like nothing can I joke about like, my son was born. And I just became my wife and my son's assistant. Like, she was like, She's like, Oh, it's here. Go stand in the corner until we need something. You know, like, it wasn't like that. But it could feel like that to me. And then I'm just like, no, desire me, so that we can make more babies like it right. A real like crazy. It's people should not have children. But yet, it's fascinating to watch it happen, right? But yeah, but now we're trying to as time moves forward, and people get more thoughtful, and are paying more attention. And I think we get to pay more attention because life is getting, you know, grand scheme of things easier, right? Like, I don't have to go chip a boulder a way to get to a cave anymore. I got more free time. So I can think about things. And then you're fighting against your instincts. And it's, uh, I don't know, it's I find the whole thing fascinating even with like the kids, like, like, look at me, don't look at that one. That one got more than me. Don't do this. Like, that's got to be something primal. Like, look, some of us are going to die. I don't want it to be me pay attention to me.

Rachel 32:31
Hmm, no, I do think that there's a lot that's primal. And a lot of how a lot of it is how we're wired. And, and I think it's when I don't, I don't think it's necessarily good to work against that. I think you notice it, you sometimes you recognize the ways that it's still helping you like when, you know, when my daughter was diagnosed. I didn't need sleep or food. Like I mean, I needed you know, enough of those things to keep going. But I might it's like, I don't remember having needs during that period. And that's fine. Like, that's survival, that's your instincts kick in, and you're trying to protect like your cub. And I think there are some ways that it's really, really helpful. And then ways that it the wiring goes wrong when you are, you know, like anxiety is sort of that wiring going wrong, because now you're worrying about things that are not life and death, but your brain is interpreting is life and death because our life is so much easier, logistically now. So yeah, I think that the wiring is really it is really fascinating and, and understanding it can be really helpful. So that you, you know, you know, when to go with it, and when it's really helping you and when you might need to, you know, introduce another storyline rather than just the the the hardwiring that we come with.

Scott Benner 33:50
Yeah, I cannot have 50 kids with 14 different women. Like I know, I wouldn't recommend it. Yeah, but there's somebody out there walking around right now is like, yeah, I'm gonna move on, make some more babies, you know, that kind of feeling. It's just, I don't want this to be morbid. And I certainly think we're 100 years past that. So it's not, but 100 years or so ago, my daughter isn't alive anymore. Yeah, you know, either as yours and you would have had this short painful experience with a bad illness and they would just be gone. Yeah. And and it would have been so for many, many met, my wife had a bad bad ear infection. It's when she was a child. I genuinely don't think she would have lived. Yeah, you know, that that kind of stuff. I my relationship with life and death. Yeah, it's crazy. My appendix when? I don't know, gosh, it's got to be like 1819 years ago now. I mean, prior to medical intervention, that would have got me Wow, I should have been really crazy. You know, like that kind of to really wrap your head around that sort of thing. Okay, so I sorry, I found you interesting. And now we're a half an hour into this. Can you imagine if you weren't interesting, nobody would be alone. Listening anymore, so it doesn't matter. They might not Anyway, we'll see Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, I pride meaning I don't know how interesting I am doesn't matter if you're interesting. I can make you interesting, but you happen to be our thing. So this is easy. So your kid has the diabetes, the other kid right away? What are they? What are you seeing like with both of them the older child and the twin? Is there an immediate feeling of Oh, they're paying more attention to her than us.

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Rachel 38:20
Yes, I mean, I think that the immediate immediate was genuine concern or at least I'd like to think so. I'm

Scott Benner 38:29
bigger than mine. This is

Rachel 38:31
I think that there was like when when she got hospitalized, it was very shocking. I mean, we just literally got told to go straight to the ER. And so I think that there was an you know, initially there was concern and but once once everyone was sort of like, okay, you know, she's going to be okay, this is a big adjustment. But you know, then she started getting gifts in the hospital and you know, she stayed home from school for a week. And so then like the what they saw as benefits so when she got eventually she got a freaking iPhone. So, watch her numbers, you know, I mean, then the like upsides started to show and I know that for my older one. And I will say that according to research, this was very typical that my older one tended to internalize. And my younger one the twin tended to externalize which is borne out in research so the the older one got very quiet and very good. Like didn't rough didn't make waves didn't complain to ruffle feathers just sort of got quiet. But he would sometimes come in with some really heartbreaking sentences like there was you know, she was diagnosed in January his birthday is in March and he said it sometime in like February. Do you think that because we would keep saying you know, this is that we're not I know this is taking a lot of attention but you know, we're not really good at this yet. We're going to get better and then it will not take up so much have our attention. Well, this isn't the new normal yet. And he asked, Do you think that this will be you'll be better at this by my birthday, because what I want from my birthday is for you to essentially pay attention to me, which was a real gun.

Unknown Speaker 40:17
It was just, it was terrible kids. Break Your Heart. No, oh,

Rachel 40:23
I No, no, it was it was like a just a full gut punch. And then the younger one really just like kept tabs, he really, he complained a lot. He monitored what presence she was getting and sort of demanded equality, which mean we didn't give them you get diabetes, you'll get presents to

Scott Benner 40:45
have an era poster, he was wandering around with these, like,

Rachel 40:49
it felt like it. Um, so he and so he really sort of externalized he was very, like verbal and, um, you know, kind of like, was the squeaky wheel. Which, you know, I mean, both both are valid, both are fair, because it was it was a big change. But that's sort of how each of them responded in the immediate aftermath

Scott Benner 41:12
have either asked if they're going to get diabetes,

Rachel 41:15
yes. Um, and I think at various times have expressed more concern, more or less concern. Um, you know, and when we're honest about, you know, you have, like, more of a chance, but still not a huge chance. And the good news is, we would know what to do a lot better. Cuz we, we've gotten, you know, we've gotten the hang of it with with Hana. So there's, there's definitely some anxiety there.

Scott Benner 41:43
I have to say, it's interesting, because that's the right response, we would know what to do better if it happened to you. That's exactly what I would say. But if I go back a half an hour in our conversation, isn't that like saying to them, don't worry if a house falls on you? It's not as bad?

Rachel 41:57
I think it depends on how you say it. I mean, it would definitely, I mean, I'll say I wouldn't only say that. Um, and you know, we do not in this house, we complain about diabetes, we do not Brightside, diabetes. So I think that, within that context, I think they feel okay about talking about, you know, that we would be able to do better, but we're not telling them to be okay with it. Like we're not saying, you know, just because we can handle it better doesn't mean that you have to feel good about it, or like it. And we what's nice is we sort of externalize diabetes in this house so that we can all be mad at diabetes, we can all dislike diabetes, and that way we're not disliking Hannah, we're not disliking the, you know, the, like the the extra care or attention that she needs. That's just how that's just how our lives are. And that's okay. Yeah, but we can all be mad at diabetes for different reasons, and at different times. And, and that's okay, too.

Scott Benner 43:05
Yeah. Isn't it interesting that you have to walk this kind of tightrope? Because she's not diabetes? Right? Yeah. And we need to keep those things separate. And at the same time, I've spoken to a lot of adults who feel like you have to embrace it.

Rachel 43:22
Yeah, it is such a balance. And I agree with the embracing. So here's like, so one of the main things I talk about as a therapist is acceptance. And basically just dropping a struggle against your feelings against your circumstances against, you know, all of the things in your life, you don't have, it doesn't mean that you like it. And it doesn't mean that you're resigned to not changing anything, it just means that you're honest about, you know, what's going on for you. And so I do try to layer in that, like, Look, we're not going to fight diabetes. And in fact, I have a little bit of a pet peeve with, like, you know, like her fight is my fight. I agree with the sentiment, like, certainly, you know, diabetes is mine, and hers. But I don't want to fight with diabetes, because it's here, it will always be here. And it is it is, it is a difficult balance to like externalize it to the point that we can all be on the same team and talk about diabetes as something separate, but also accept that diabetes is part of our lives, it is not going away, and that we all have diabetes in our family.

Scott Benner 44:39
I think that all these things lead me to be happy about the podcast because it was always my thought that whether you think her fight is my fight is a rallying cry or you hear it as like, Oh, you shouldn't be fighting like that's, that's all just the way people think about things like I don't right, but the one that I've always maintained was, if it was easier to take care of your blood sugar, all of this crap would be easier. And so true, right? Let's get to a point where we understand how to use the insulin so that when we have real human feelings, or we're the kinds of people who push down human feelings, or we're whatever we are, at least it's not going to be as difficult and our health isn't one of the issues.

Rachel 45:23
100% Yeah, and I will say that, like listening to your podcast was definitely a turning point for us. I started I was recommended to me about three months in and I started listening to it and immediately turned it off. Because I was just like, wow, that's too much. I'm not ready. And then I came back to it about eight months in and sort of went through kind of the main, like recommended ones for being bold with insulin. And it it really was a game changer in terms of tackling our own fear. And using insulin appropriately and more aggressively. assertively, I should say, you can't. It was a it was a it was a really, it was really helpful.

Scott Benner 46:05
I'm glad I am very glad you can't force people into being in the place, which is why just why the podcast is, is valuable, because it's a living document, kind of a feeling. So it's not like you send them to a blog post or one thought, and then they hit it and like you didn't go, Oh, I'm not ready for this. And then you walk away from it. It's a I don't even know, like, I think of the podcast is, you know, sort of like a warm rolling wave that just sort of keeps ma forward through my experience with Arden and Arden's experience with diabetes. Yeah, you know, sort of just kind of it keeps going, it's always going to keep going, I could see that 20 years from now I could be doing an episode about Arden's having a baby or a wedding or, you know, I'm giving myself a lot of credit for me able to stay alive for 20 more years, but but you know, that kind of, I don't see how this narrative stops. And I can see how left behind is a time capsule that one day could end up being just as valuable to someone in 10 years as it is to someone today. I can see that too. I think that's great. So I just, that's, to me, this is a perfect medium for that. And I'm not all that photogenic, so it really is kind of perfect. Even better. It's funny, I look in the mirror, and I'm like, I'm pretty handsome. And then someone takes a picture of me. And I'm like, that's not the guy in the mirror. Like what's going on?

Rachel 47:30
So yeah, welcome to ageing man. That's just I think that's just the way it is from here on out.

Scott Benner 47:36
If I stayed far enough away from the camera to be comfortable with it, you'd be like, I think someone back there was talking about. But But anyway, I just think that it's, it's interesting to see the kids all have different experiences with it. And at the same time, I don't know that it's very much different than any other experiences they had. It's just sped up. Right? Does that make sense to you that life's happening kind of slowly, you don't notice it. And these problems or difficulties arise, and you get more time to deal with them. But this thing just comes in a wash. It's there right away? Yeah.

Rachel 48:18
And you can't, you can't like slowly figure it out. You've just got to get on board.

Scott Benner 48:24
Now you're standing there trying to figure out how to parent it. You're thinking about how to manage it, like from a technical aspect. You're thinking about the impact on three different children. I'm assuming at some point in the quiet moment, you're worried about your husband, you know, they mean like he's worried about you, you're worried about yourself, or he's worried about himself. Nobody thought this was what was gonna happen. You know, it takes away the picture you painted in your head, like, what we'll do is we'll make some babies. Rachel's a therapist, it's great. I have my job. We'll buy a house one day, it'll be good. Like, you know, now all of a sudden, everything feels like whoa, none of that matters right now. Yeah. How do I stop this toast from making my kids blood sugar? 300 all day? Yeah, yep. Yeah. And then your other kids, like, I want to play soccer. And you're like, I'm trying not to kill your sister. Leave me alone. That's so true. I don't care if you like soccer all the sudden. And then you feel terrible for feeling that like, and, and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And everyone has their own experience in their own feeling. Now, here's the question. When when a child comes to you, your trained person, right, and they ask a question, does your brain go through like the Dewey Decimal System of proper responses and just pull out a card and start reading? Or are you not able to do that? And if you aren't able to do that, how the hell am I supposed to be able to do that?

Rachel 49:43
Well, I think there's, in my best moments, yes, my brain does that. And then I mean, but there's also a difference between pulling out the card and application of the skills on that card which usually goes sideways. Because kids are very unpredictable, and they have not read the research about what's supposed to be effective.

Scott Benner 50:06
And look at you, by the way makes you feel bad about yourself. And then you're like, Oh, this kid knows, I don't know what I'm doing.

Rachel 50:13
Yeah. But the good news is that there is a lot there. All the research suggests that you do not have to be perfect or even near perfect to be a great parent. So also keep that in my mind, too, is that you just really have to be good enough. It's literally a scientific phrase good enough parenting. Yeah. And so when a kid comes to me, I do. If I'm at my best, I will cycle through some of the things that might be effective. And, and try to pick a strategy. But the more important thing is not what strategy you pick, but that you're sending the message that when they come and share something with you, you take it seriously, and you refocus your attention on them as soon as you can. If it's not in that moment. You tell them when you can, and then follow through on making sure that you're connecting with them, then that's actually the more important thing than any one strategy.

Scott Benner 51:04
How important is your intent? Like that? You mean? Well,

Rachel 51:10
intent is very important. Yeah. Um, I think that the message is, I care. And even if you aren't quite sure how to help them with the specific feeling or situation that they're coming to you with, the more important, you can still send the message that you care and that you'll help you'll, you know, work with them to help figure it out. And that's, that's really the the most important message because that one applies to all things.

Scott Benner 51:39
Let me ask you a question. I feel like I notice that people give up on parenting too soon, in age for their children. Is that something you notice when people like they're all like, you know, their babies? And they're like, yeah, this is I can do this. And they're all intent. And you know, the kids sex and some kid touched them on the playground, and you're at the school ready to beat up a six year old, like, you've got all that like energy for children. And then suddenly, they hit an age where they seem like, they don't need you anymore. And they act like they don't what it's like 12 1314 where they disappear to their room for a while, or they act like they don't want to be a part of the of the family as much like that, like pulling away starts. And people get their feelings hurt, I think, or just think that the kids like, Oh, look, look how self sufficient and then they start like, I always did want a pink. You don't I mean, then suddenly, you're not parenting as harsh. And that's, to me the exact wrong time to stop paying attention. Cuz now they have genitals that they're aware of. And, and, and someone's like, have you tried vaping? And they're like, vaping? Is that like sex? Can we do them both at the same time? Like you don't need me and like suddenly, your

Rachel 52:45
your brain has, you've just demonstrated an anxiety spiral with absolute accuracy.

Scott Benner 52:51
Thank you, I and I don't feel that way. By the way. Like, I feel like, I feel like I am gonna be connected and parenting until it's appropriate not to be. And I do not allow my children to dissuade me from being a good parent, much like when you hear me talk about when I was little. I had this like, I got sick one time and there was this giant pill like people are so much better making medicine now you don't even realize was this big, dry thing stuck in your throat. And I tried to be like, Oh, I don't want to take it. And before I knew it, my dad's giant fingers. Were just shoving it down my throat and I was like, okay, like, it's like 1975 He's like, I don't care what you think. Here we go. I sat in here in the kitchen all day staring at you crying about this pill like that kind of feeling. When now I hear people say like, Oh, you know, we moisten the adhesive for 47 hours before we pull off the CGM, because Billy doesn't like it. If it stings, my dad would have just grabbed it with a fist and pulled it off with part of my arm. You know, I mean, and not to say he was right. But we're in a weird time right now with parenting. And yeah, you don't I mean, just in general. Can you talk more about that for me?

Rachel 54:02
Yeah, I mean, I think I think what you said about parents, parents getting their feelings hurt. I actually think that's a really important note. You know, we saw kids pulling away about that age or like wanting more independence, wanting more privacy, that's developmentally appropriate. And it has nothing to do with the parents. But it can feel really personal when it's your kid and that's okay. Like you're entitled to those feelings. It's okay to have hurt feelings. But to recognize that, that doesn't mean that it's about you. That's it's just a feeling that you have and it's valid and fair. But it it, you're you're you're kind of centering yourself in a situation that developmentally they're doing what they're supposed to do, but they absolutely still need parents and parenting. And the hope is that in like the interactions that you do have with them, that you are being very clear and powerful and sending the message that you are available and interested in them? Whenever they, you know, they feel comfortable with that, and insisting on certain times. So you can you are still the parent you can still set rules were like up, this is family time you can moan and groan if you want, but we're all hanging out. And, you know, I think that it's really important to to continue to parent with, you know, focus and intentionality through the entire I mean adolescence is, it's wild, like so they do need parents, and they do need parenting during that time. So I definitely agree with the assessment. But that's not when we should be. That's not when we get to take up painting. Yeah, that might be around the corner. But it's not. It's not here yet.

Scott Benner 55:46
Rachel, I love you. We could have been married and enjoying our life together as adults not having sex. And I think we would have been very happy. And let me tell you why. Because everything you just said, I completely agreed with. And I was about to say, I was like, Oh, I hope she goes deeper into this. Let me have this thought in the back of my head in case she stops. But you were Oh my God, you're so good at this. Congratulations. Yeah, your kids grow up to be serial killers and monsters, probably. But I'm gonna take no responsibility for that. Oh, listen, life life. I didn't have anything. But I still, like my son's in college. He's a reasonable kid. And and and there are still times where I'll say to him, Look, he might he might go, look, I'm not interested in your thoughts. And there are times where you have to evaluate and go, Okay, you know what, this isn't a hill to die on for me, right? It's not that important. But there have been times and there will be times in the future where I say to him, listen to me, I have put the last 21 years of my life in existence into you. And if you think in this moment, I'm not gonna say something you're out of your mind. Like, I didn't go all this way for you to drop dead now jackass. Like, you know, they mean, like, I'm gonna leave me here by myself with my thoughts. Like, that's not happening. You know, but But seriously, sometimes you have to go to them and just say, look, I hear how you feel. I think that's reasonable. And here's a perspective you don't have yet because you're 30 years younger than me, please take five seconds and listen to me. And sometimes you have to, sometimes you have to take the pill and stick it in their throat and be like, Listen, I'm not standing here all day with you. You need to swallow this. We're doing this thing right now. It's important.

Rachel 57:31
You know, and as as now, a grown up, which, using the word grown up to describe myself does not make me feel like a grown up that feels like a kid saying I'm a grown up. But I have reflected with my mom quite a bit about how all the advice that I didn't want growing up and into even young adulthood was 100%. Right? Yeah, totally correct. And of course it was, she's older, she knows what she's doing. But even when it was unwelcome, and even when I didn't take it necessarily at the time, I can remember it. So I think it's important to recognize that you are still an influence, you are still a voice. And you do have knowledge and experience that will benefit them. Even if they don't listen to it. It doesn't vanish, you're still you're still participating and connecting. And that's so important. And maybe when they're grown up like I am, they can come to you and say, Yeah, I guess you were right that whole time.

Scott Benner 58:29
I just don't want to. I am trying not to get cancer so that my kids can come back to me and tell me I'm right. And then I'm gonna drop dead happy. That's all I'm looking for. It really is like, I just want one little bit of validation at the end, and I don't care. As long as I can cognitively hear it. I know that I can look him in the face and go, I told you but no, but again, but seriously. Absolutely. That's impeccable advice. It really is it life is a long game. Parenting is a long game. Diabetes is a long game. If you think you're going to win today and get to sit back on the beach. You're you You're misunderstanding life, not just diabetes are parents

Rachel 59:12
now life? I mean, yeah, it's all of this is unknown, unpredictable. And, and a long game. And yeah, it's it's you, you don't always see the like the fruit of the seeds that you plant. And that's a lot of how I think of parenting is, you know, I might, you know, I might not ever get the Wow, I learned so much from you. And you were right, the whole time speech. I'd be sad if I didn't. But that doesn't mean that the seeds that I'm planting now and the connections that I'm making now aren't paying dividends in the future because we're teaching our kids how to be in the world. And they're there. They're watching us and they're learning and that is something that they will take with them. And, you know, hopefully, we do good enough parenting that that they're taking that they're taking A positive and a healthy worldview with them when they leave the nest.

Scott Benner 1:00:04
So I'm going to share something with you. I've never said on the podcast before I opened up my reminders on my computer. So Apple, I need you to stay in business for a long time. I have a reminder set for Christmas Eve. 2033. Wow, it says, Call Arden and see if she enjoys having Christmas pictures of herself. She owes me $100? If she does, this is a bet I made with her when she was nine. I've had that reminder in my computer for eight years already. But does she want Christmas pictures taken? I was trying to take pictures on Christmas Eve. And she's like, I don't want these. And I said, Well, you will when you're older. And she said No, I won't. And I was like, Oh, yeah. Your commitment to I told you so is amazing. It's it's, it's just that I listen, I don't begrudge a person who would rather sit on the beach their whole life, right? But I am, I have been a person who's been built to have children since I was little. And it's, you know, my dad leaves. When I'm 13. I take care of my little brothers, I see the impact my mom gets from being divorced and being. And this just becomes, you know, I've said it before. But you know, if I owe my dad anything, he really showed me what I don't want to be. And so it's incredibly important to me, I don't have anything more important than my health, my family's health and my children's future. Like that's what I want to do. I think if you want to know what I think life's about, I think life is about leaving somebody else better off than you are. I really don't i don't think there's some big payoff at the end. And so in a, in a slog like this, where if I'm lucky and don't get super sick, I could live at some years in that kind of a fight. At the very end. I just want to know that it was not even worth it. Because it's worth it to me no matter what I want to know that I had an impact on it. Yeah, I think I don't want to tell her I told you. So. I wanted to I wanted to say I have that picture. And I enjoy it. And then I think like okay, I spent my time well, you know, yeah, that's

Rachel 1:02:22
Yeah, I think of it like ripples, like I want the ripples of my life to positively impact the people around me and to ripple out and hopefully create new ripples. And I might never see the the ways that my life has impacted others. But I really hope that that I am somehow positively impacting people in even very small ways. And yeah, I agree with you that like that's how I think of life. And where I think the kind of the satisfaction comes from that satisfaction comes from your effort

Scott Benner 1:03:01
in the moment not in seeing the fruits of your labor, or it's just not going to work. That's why it for me. I don't know if you realize this, Rachel, but if I ever find a genie lamp on the beach washed up in the ocean, I already have my wishes all like set up because I don't want to mess up because I know in the moment I'm just going to ask for like the Heather Locklear off the poster when I was a kid and like a car like I know. Yeah, so you the first the first wish is, no matter what happens. My next wish was definitely come true. Your second wishes, unlimited wishes, you just go like that. And then. Right? Yeah. And then the first thing I'd want to do is, even if I couldn't live forever, which I don't know, I would want to or not, I'd want to come back like once every 100 years. I have key. I've said this so many times. Yeah, just to see, like live here a year, every 100 years just to see what happens.

Rachel 1:03:56
I just want to see what's up with people like, hey, what have we done? I want I have said this so many times that like I, you know, I don't necessarily want to like follow like, check in on my immediate family because like they're gonna be fine. Like, of course I care. And I'm curious. And that would be amazing, but they're going to be great. I'm really curious about like, the big picture stuff. Yeah. What are we doing as a species? I think that's gonna be really interesting.

Scott Benner 1:04:21
I want an electric car for the same reason I bought a computer when I was 13 years old. Just want to see what it is. Yeah, you don't I mean, I want to see how it's different from the thing I already understand. And, and for people. You know, it might be obvious. It's funny as I'm talking and maybe the people listening are like, Yeah, well, Scott, this is what the podcast is for people with diabetes, but like, it's not as obvious to me. But I just keep thinking, like, you know, change the way people see insulin change the way they see success for themselves change, you know, so that everybody doesn't feel burdened, make people who want to be, you know, diabetes practitioners. We're gonna think about it this way, like, really try to impact the space in an important way. And so when you hear me say, like, share the shows, so it grows like that is so I can charge money for ads. But that's so that I can keep making the show. Absolutely. Don't get me wrong, I love money just like everybody else. That's not what I'm talking about, like, totally, I want to make the podcast bigger so that it reaches more people so that the ripples go farther, so that it can continue to work. Like that kind of thing. Like that's, that means a lot to me. So I just wanted to I just want people to live a better life, I saw somebody this morning online. And I can say this now, because this won't come out for six months. But their, their child talked about using insulin and appropriately to hurt themselves six months after a diagnosis because the kid doesn't want to have diabetes anymore. And you know, some people are going to feel that way. Well, what happens next is what's important, like, you're not going to stop somebody who's going to feel that way from feeling that way. But the help you get them next could redirect their lives. And I want that answer to be obvious and available to people for awesome. I'm talking to a person now who's in their 30s, they've had diabetes forever. And I've been following them on their their Dexcom for a while. And I'm just telling you, it's a it's just years of managing type one in a different way. And now having different tools and not knowing how to let go of the past and bring these new ideas into their management. Like, I just want to I keep telling the person like you have to Pre-Bolus your meals, right? Well, that's hard for me, I'm like, I don't care, like you want all this other stuff, right? But you won't Pre-Bolus the Pre-Bolus thing is why the other stuffs not coming like what either either do it or don't but don't keep telling me you want it but you're not willing to do it. And it's not her fault. It's she's in this is ingrained in her. Yeah, you know, and so I'm just trying to imagine that 30 years from now, it's ingrained in people in a different way. And the technology is that much better. And God, maybe there's no something that makes the whole thing easier, go away or whatever. But until then, I think about her, like I think about that woman the same way I think about your two year old when somebody sends me a message, they're like, they're like, look at my kids graph there to like, and I'm like, oh God, like I can't let this be like this, this is so simple to fix, like, so let's let's I just, I don't know, I have no idea why but I am. I feel sometimes responsible for things I'm not responsible for. So

Rachel 1:07:36
well. But that passion is definitely like, the, that passion is creating the ripples that are impacting people and people are hearing me, I think it's a great example of, you know, what we hope to do and being in the world. And, and the fact that you have the passion, and now the expertise to do it and to impact this change. It's, it's wonderful. And that those, those are the ripples that you're creating, it's great,

Scott Benner 1:08:02
I appreciate that. I'm, I love doing it. And I am I passionate it is absolutely the right word, like when I see somebody selling these ideas online, but they're like, you know, for six months, you can get my package, and I'm like, please do not give that person money. So they can explain to you that you need to Pre-Bolus and your basil has to be right, like, please don't do that. And yet they do. And people pay them $600,000 to get told something that three episodes of this podcast would be happy to tell you for free. And, you know, and and so that's where I'm still very, I'm a very American thinker about that I'm, I'm a capitalist, I think that I should get my money from someone else. And you should get the information for free,

Rachel 1:08:42
which is amazing for all of us. Because I definitely was benefiting from the free information.

Scott Benner 1:08:49
It's a barrier. If I imagine you get told to go to a podcast like you were you already got there. And you're like, wow, this is too much money, or too much information. I don't need it right now. If it costs money, would you ever come back? That's true. I don't know, I probably would have negative feelings associated with it. And so I had a person contact me recently. And they're like, you know, your podcast is big enough, you should have a Patreon. And I was like what she goes, people would be happy to give you money for making the podcast. I was like I make money for making the podcast. And she goes, Well, how many listeners do you have? And I told her how many the estimate is? And she said, Can you imagine if 10% of those people sent you $5 a month and I went Oh, I can't I never did before and then I was like, wouldn't be a bad thing, would it? And she goes, What would you do with it? And I said well, I would probably expand and I started thinking about how I would make the podcast better and how I could help the podcast reach more people and I thought should I do that? Like Like, did it mean and I'm stuck in that feeling because she's not wrong. It would generate funds and the funds would go a long way towards doing stuff for the show. And at the same time, I can't like I'm not of that generation. Like, it feels like I'd be making money for not doing anything for being me. And that doesn't seem right. Well, the therapist in me has lots of follow ups. Go five minutes, feel free to pick me apart?

Rachel 1:10:23
Well, I just I am curious about what like what it means to you to be getting money from like, what is that? What is the story that you're telling about? Why about getting money from people who enjoy the podcast?

Scott Benner 1:10:37
Well, I mean, I'm already making a reasonable amount of money for making the podcast. Mm hmm. And I really don't want to take money from people. So they can learn how to be healthy, I wouldn't want somebody to put their hand out to me and said, I can explain this to you for $5. And I realized that the podcast wouldn't be it wouldn't be. I think I'm right. To say that I'm wrong about this. I think it wouldn't be a big deal. If people who wanted to send a couple of dollars a month were able to do that.

Rachel 1:11:06
Well, because you're not you're not charging. It's not a paywall. It's not. So I think that the the hang up is not necessarily. It's not necessarily in that it, like changes your sense of values, or what you know, your vision is for the podcast, but there's something that you're there's a story you're telling about what it would mean, that I think is the hang up.

Scott Benner 1:11:33
Yeah, and it's not real.

Rachel 1:11:34
It's not real. I mean, we all tell stories to ourselves. That's, that's what we do. And, and I don't, I don't think it's useful to argue with stories, either. You can see them and notice them and be curious about them, but then also make some space for other stories. Like another story in this case might be, hey, somebody might really feel compelled to want to offer money as a thank you not because you're charging and not because you expect it. But to say, hey, this has been an invaluable resource for my family. And I want to say thank you. And it's, you know, just a way that you're making that option available. That's another story. And neither one is more true. It's just recognizing that it's, this is more about the meaning that you're making of the situation than necessarily the thoughts involved with this choice.

Scott Benner 1:12:21
Your Listen, you're right, because that already happens. Yeah, like people already send me like gifts. Yeah. And I'm, I'm like, Oh, I'm happy. The podcast helps you. Thank you. And you know, and you're right. It's something about me saying it out loud. That feels wrong to me by saying, Hey, I have a thing and you could support because I know what I would do. Like, I'd be happy to like, like, shut off the recording and tell you like some of the things that I've got going on right now that would be a lot easier with with some more money. You know what I mean? So, yeah, all right. Let me make some room for other stories and see, see how that feels. All right, Rachel. I'll think about it. Thank you. Alright. Hold on one second. I appreciate you doing this. By the way. Did we talk about everything you want to talk about, by the way?

Rachel 1:13:09
Yeah, I mean, I, I mean, I could get real clinical and talk about some of the things that siblings might experience but I feel like I feel like we've done more just having a casual conversation.

Scott Benner 1:13:20
So do I. That's my magic. By the way. I'm only good enough. Yes, this is one of them. I want to thank Rachel for coming on the program and having this wonderful conversation with me. I'd also like to thank the Contour Next One blood glucose meter and reminds you go to Contour Next one.com Ford slash juicebox. If you want to look in the show notes of your podcast player, there's a link there or I keep the links at Juicebox Podcast comm there's even a link to touched by type one in those exact places where you can just type into your browser touched by type one.org. Thank you so much for listening. I'll be back soon with another episode of the Juicebox Podcast.

#535 Diabetes Variables: Video Games

Diabetes Variables: Video Games

Scott and Jenny Smith, CDE share insights on type 1 diabetes care

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Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends and welcome to Episode 535 of the Juicebox Podcast.

Jenny's here today to do another diabetes variable with me. And today's topic is video games. This is the eighth in the diabetes variable series. So far we've covered trampolines, temperature travel, exercise, hydration, food quality, leaky sites, or tunneling. And of course today, those good old video games, there's also a diabetes protest episode about variables that is Episode 231. If you haven't heard the diabetes protests, I wish you would give them a try. They begin at Episode 210 where you can find them at diabetes pro tip.com. Please remember while you're listening today that nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice, medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan or becoming bold with insulin. Today is a pretty short episode there's only one ad and I think the episodes about 15 minutes long. I hope you enjoy it. This show is sponsored today by the glucagon that my daughter carries g vo hypo pen Find out more at G Vogue glucagon.com forward slash juicebox g vo hypo pan has no visible needle and it's the first premixed auto injector of glucagon for very low blood sugar in adults and kids with diabetes ages two and above. Not only is chivo hypo pen simple to administer, but it's simple to learn more about. All you have to do is go to G Vogue glucagon.com forward slash juicebox G voke shouldn't be used in patients with insulinoma or pheochromocytoma. Visit g Vogue glucagon.com slash risk. Well, here's one that I hear from a lot of moms. I don't want to be too specific, but a lot of moms of boys usually my kids blood sugar shoots up and they don't just mean 40 or 50 points. They're talking about 202 50 when they play video games is that adrenaline? That's adrenaline. That's people should know that.

Jennifer Smith, CDE 2:43
It's and I think you're right in terms of video games and maybe the type of person who might be playing one video game versus another. I mean, I like age old like Mario Brothers I can guarantee you my blood sugar was never going up when I was playing Mario Brothers with my brother as a child okay, but I can probably say that if I could go back if I was doing some of the the Olympic ones where you were like competing against the other person like you were doing jumping and even though it wasn't an activity my brother and I were very competitive in that in terms of who did better so I would guess without knowing I didn't have achieved CGM at that point but I would guess that my blood sugar probably went up a bit

Scott Benner 3:34
I'm picturing you trash talking to your brother playing we bowling right now.

Jennifer Smith, CDE 3:39
Oh it wasn't we bowling It was like Do you remember the old like you had to do like the lock you had to like run run run and then do like the long job kind of thing like the old school Nintendo right Yeah, no

Scott Benner 3:51
kidding like can you get moved in? So that's interest but

Jennifer Smith, CDE 3:55
today's games

Scott Benner 3:57
the first person shooters and that's stuff that feels like you're really doing specially

Jennifer Smith, CDE 4:00
the virtual ones the ones where you have the visual the goggles on you are almost immersed in that setting. And many times there will be a rise especially if it's any of the what I call more violent ones. You know the games where you're really like shooting and killing or you're battling the zombies are these like demon looking creatures?

Scott Benner 4:26
I've been scared I've sorted for my son shoulder and watched it been like this is kind of Loki frightening. Yes, and I know I'm okay I'm so I wonder too. I would love to hear from somebody I wonder if it is that competition piece. coupled together with the frightening like intense nature of it like all that together just drives out of nowhere. So do you Bolus for it?

Jennifer Smith, CDE 4:57
I usually recommend paying attention too What ends up happening, because a first visual is often what parents see in activities or competitions, sport, not obviously the practices. But typically the sport on the weekend where you're doing a tournament or a game against your ATM, you know, rival or whatever it is, this spike in blood sugar, we can either see, blood sugar sits high, and you do have to take care of it, or it's just high the whole game, or it spikes. But then as the kid keeps moving things even out and they end up coming down without correcting the adrenaline rush at all. So the piece in the picture of these games is, is it a seated adrenaline rush type of game? Or is it one in which you are also moving along with the game? That may be the difference of correcting? or letting the rise happen and letting it even out?

Scott Benner 5:59
Is there an impact about what happens after the game? So if I kill the zombies, jack, my blood sugar up and then sit down? That would be different than if I did that and began to move around afterwards? Because the movement might have a blood sugar down. But if you go from a jacked up adrenaline to sedentary or into bed or into a meal, right, then you're not Yeah, then those other variables are going to keep the adrenaline from because I've seen I think there's a fairly common story that I have told on the podcast a number of times about noticing that Arden was competitive at sports, and learning to Bolus for it. But the other you know, the end of that story is, yes, it kept it down. But then she needed food later, I was basically Pre-Bolus Singh food, and the Pre-Bolus was handling the spike of adrenaline. And then afterwards, it needed to be fed.

Jennifer Smith, CDE 6:53
Or it was like the end of that insulin action had to be taken care of.

Scott Benner 6:57
Yeah, the adrenaline bump in blood sugar was not enough. How do I mean this, the the insulin, the amount of insulin I used was necessary to keep her blood sugar stable through the adrenaline. But as soon as the adrenaline was gone, there was still insulin leftover and it needed carbs.

Jennifer Smith, CDE 7:16
Right especially considering it's on the back end of exercise, which enhances insulin absorption for a couple of hours after in most cases,

Scott Benner 7:23
which is why aren't always got waffles after basketball. So it was like a nice little pre planning thing. Like I still would listen, I used to do the same trick afternoon at high school, she'd get higher 1231 3230. But she was always hungry after school. So I was aggressive through that afternoon, knowing that there was going to be food right at three o'clock. Right, you know, and then that's, that was one of the ways I was able to stay on top of that kind of blood sugar problem without causing a low later. Right. So video games, and that's just, it's confounding to people when it happens then once they see it, they're like video games make my kids blood sugar go up. I wonder. I wonder if it says frequent with girls as it is with boys.

Jennifer Smith, CDE 8:11
I would expect it's it depends on what their interest is. Yeah, you know, a lot of the girls that I work with who are sort of in that like eight to 12 range where they're sort of getting into like the dance dance type of game or whatever it is. They're excited about doing it. But that's that's like exercise they're moving and so their insulin needs actually obviously go down. I wear a lot of girls games girls specific I guess if we're terming them boy girl games, which they're not really anything. Yeah.

Scott Benner 8:49
No, I mean, like, I wonder how many people who are, you know, who are girls are into like, thrashing zombies in video games. It seems like a I mean, I don't know I'm using my

Jennifer Smith, CDE 9:02
I would guess that if there was a group of friends that was very interested in doing it all together, regardless whether they were boys and girls, they just wanted to hang out and they were all doing that. And

Scott Benner 9:13
I just wonder if like internally in their brain they have that same like, kill it, stomp it I'm amazing. Let me win feeling like I want to hear from somebody who's got a little killer for a daughter. Outside just running through things constantly.

Jennifer Smith, CDE 9:28
The warrior ninja child.

Scott Benner 9:37
A huge thank you to one of today's sponsors. g Vogue glucagon, find out more about chivo Kibo pen at G Vogue glucagon.com forward slash juice box. you spell that GVOKEGL Uc ag o n.com forward slash choose ba If you'd like to hire Jenny, she works at integrated diabetes comm go check her out. Thank you so much for listening. I'm gonna put a little bit of information after the music about the pro tip series and the defining diabetes series. But if you already know about that stuff, pace, you're done.

Alright guys, there's some series within the podcasts that are about management. I mean, you're listening to one now variables. There's also the defining diabetes series, which goes over jargon, tools, ideas, but there's also the diabetes pro tip series. And I want to read you just one piece of feedback that I got from a Facebook user just a couple of weeks ago. It said, I've been listening to the podcast since May of 2019, when my son was diagnosed, without all of your help, advice, tips, education, we wouldn't be where we are now, a one C in the fives this last year, brought it down from 11.3 diagnosis, no food restrictions. And I swear my child doesn't even know he has diabetes half of the time. That's from Christine, I could read you hundreds and hundreds more. But instead, I would just like it, if you check out the diabetes pro tip episodes, I've tried to make them easy for you to get to because I realized there's so many episodes in the podcast. So you can go to Juicebox Podcast COMM And at the top, just click on diabetes pro tip. actually gonna make sure I'm telling you the right way Juicebox Podcast calm diabetes pro tip will take you right to it. Or there's a direct link, diabetes, pro tip.com. At diabetes pro tip calm, you'll have access to all of the pro tip episodes. So you can write down the numbers and go find them in your podcast player or just listen to the mirror online doesn't matter. You'll also have access to the defining diabetes series, please just check them out. They're very worth your time. I saw a mention of the podcast and one of the Dexcom groups I follow on Facebook, the pro tip series is filled with such great information. Thank you. For someone who has been living with diabetes for 30 plus years, I wish I had been more proactive in finding this information sooner. I'm going to recommend this to my endo. I'd love it if you could be the next person to leave a review like that. And I think you could, if you just check out the pro tip series. I don't know how many episodes there are at this point, maybe 20 could listen to them at your leisure. They're absolutely free. The whole podcast is always free. I don't think it would take you that long. But I do think they'd really be valuable for you. So I hope you check them out. Thank you so much for listening, for sharing the show with others. And for downloading it in your podcast apps that I'm positive you're subscribed in. Please tell me you're subscribing to your podcast apps, please. Thank you. If you don't know what a podcast app is and you want one, go to Juicebox Podcast comm or diabetes pro tip calm there's links to the most popular ones. They're all free. You should not have to pay for a podcast app, Google podcasts, Spotify, Apple podcast, Pandora, Apple Music, Android, just there's it's an endless list of ways you can listen you can basically listen anywhere that you get audio.

#534 Misdiagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes

Laura was misdiagnosed with type 2 diabetes.

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Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends, and welcome to Episode 532 of the Juicebox Podcast. On today's show, I'll be speaking with Raquel gal has type one diabetes. She's trying to help people with type one diabetes, and she drove me to the airport. That's pretty much how she got on the show. That's it that easy. Give me a ride to the airport. Get there Come on the podcast. Please remember, while you're listening that nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice, medical or otherwise. Please always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan or becoming bold with insulin.

couple of quick reminders here, please head over to T one d exchange.org. forward slash juicebox. And fill out the survey if you're a US resident who has type one diabetes, or a US resident, who is the caregiver of someone with type one, you'll be supporting Type One Diabetes Research when you do and you'll be supporting the podcast p one d exchange.org. forward slash juice box.

This show is sponsored today by the glucagon that my daughter carries g vo cuyp open. Find out more at G Vogue glucagon.com forward slash juicebox.

Raquel 1:46
Hi, I'm Raquel and some of you might know me as type one day on Instagram. I've had type one for 19 years I wear the tandem t slim pump and the Dexcom. I'm also the founder of type one together we provide resources and products for kids with type one, and also for their parents. And yeah, fun fact I drove Scott to the airport from the duty of Dallas summit to Yeah, he needed to read. So that happened.

Scott Benner 2:11
Oddly, oddly funner fact, I believe I mentioned that for the very first time in an episode that just went up recently.

Raquel 2:17
So you know what? I was listening yesterday. And then I heard that, you know, your wife thought you'd be murdered by me So specifically, not by you know, yeah, someone so funny. I was like, oh, that would be me. I'm not

Scott Benner 2:33
just the person that facilitated the story. You weren't the person I thought might murder me. I have yet people. Actually, I'm gonna interview a woman next week, who I thought was at least gonna punch me at one of the events. And turns out she loves me. So there we go. We're all good. Oh, I think I bring people right. I can see how it can be. It can be scary. For sure. So we're at the very beginning you said your Instagram handle, but I don't think you said it very clearly.

Raquel 2:59
Oh, type one day. So like, taking one diabetes one day at a time was kind of the how I started that years ago. I don't know. Yeah, type one day.

Scott Benner 3:09
It's funny when you look back and everybody's like type one, this T one that blah, blah, blah. And you can't Yeah, I'm it straight. You think when you made it, you're like this is so like, this is the one I used to. I know. I used to joke with people. Like I would go to like blogging conferences used to be a thing. And I've gone to a handful of them in my life. And they'd go around the room and people would introduce themselves. And people would be like, Hi my name is ba and I'm from like diabetes this and diabetes that type one this and you know the sugars and blah blah blah and I begged him Scott it write a blog called Arden's dag and everybody would look at me like the word diabetes isn't in there anywhere. And I mean, that's better this point because you stand out turned out that was true. But in the moment in that room, I was like, Did I mess up by not like putting the word diabetes in my title. And then one at one of them. I made the joke out loud. I was like, obviously, I screwed up not putting the word diabetes in the title. And then I realized later, I don't think people saw that as me joking about myself. I think the people in the room saw me, like mocking them for doing it. And I never meant it that way. But yeah, oh, what am I gonna do? Everybody can't get out. Everyone can't get the humor. So here's what I remember. You told me if I'm right. Dallas, sucked for me, because it didn't give me the opportunity to do what I normally do at things. It was great in a lot of other ways, but I'm very accustomed. So my schedule is if you have me in to speak, I speak in the morning. I speak at lunch. I speak in the afternoon, and then I run and I talk to the kids room. And then I get on a plane and the way I think of that is first of all, I I can't Stand the idea of flying somewhere to talk for an hour, that just seems stupid. And secondly, I think that the ideas that I'm pumping out are probably so far from center for most people that they need a little bit of a primer. So that kind of come in, I'm like, hey, imagine if this could happen. That's the first hour, and then you get enough of them. They're like, that makes sense. And then they show up at lunch, and they listen again, and everybody else is there. And they get to hear it for the first time, too. So the people who didn't come to the first one became to the second one, have an opportunity to come to the third one, because that was just a q&a. I just go in and I answer everybody's questions. And then my, my, my real, like, love of being at these things, is then you go to the kids, because I imagined in my mind that people don't show up at Type One Diabetes conferences, because their blood sugar management is terrific. And they're there to celebrate, right? Like, they're there because they're lost and stuff is not going well. And my biggest fear is that the kids get home, the parents are now armed, what they heard me talking about, they turn to the kids and like, I have an idea I heard I, you know, imagine you're the kid, and you've had diabetes for a year or three years, or whatever, you've had it. And you've watched your parents struggle to figure this out. And they've never once gotten anything, right. So you're just gonna think, wait, why, like, take the insulin a little sooner or like, but that's the so I want to put the kids on board with the ideas. So that when they get together with their parents, it's a nice mash. And that was that's my goal. But I didn't get to do that in Dallas, because I was filling in for somebody.

Raquel 6:36
But yeah, I I wish he were the keynote for sure. But um, but that room was so packed. And I feel like people were so invested in it. And I mean, I've been a panel speaker for a couple of conferences, and you know, people aren't you can tell when people aren't really paying attention. So yeah, I think it's cool that you got to speak to the kids. Sometimes I didn't even realize that. But I still think that it was so impactful for so many people. They had their phones out there taking pictures, they were taking notes. That was really cool to see.

Scott Benner 7:03
Yeah. Well, I did. Um, I mean, I did slip into the kids room. I was like, hey, they're like playing some game. Like, can I just talk to the kids for a minute, the guy running the room was looking at me like, well, I'm like, Okay, I'm wondering if it'll be fine, probably. And so I just gave him like, a quick 20 minutes, showed them some graphs that I had on my phone. And you know, they look at those graphs, and they're like, that's me. That's my life. Like, that's the crap I live with. You don't need me. And I was like, doesn't have to be like this. I'm like, look at this one. Look at that one. All that person did was a few things. You guys could listen to the podcast, or you could talk to your parents about it. I just spoke to your parents upstairs. Like I still did the whole. At that point. I said, I'm going to talk to your parents later, because they helped me to like the end of the day, too. Which was, um, I don't know I was anyway, so I had all this damn time. And you and I got to talk a fair amount, or at least way more than I usually get to talk to people. So it's nice to me.

Raquel 7:59
It's fun. Yeah, I've been such a fan of the podcast for so long now. And it's funny because a lot of the Tiguan community here in Austin, which is where I live, I'm from Dallas originally, um, they just kind of laugh because every time we meet a newly diagnosed person, I'm always like, you have to listen to the podcast. And I think they get annoyed me because I just mentioned it way too much. But it's funny, because I was even on a walk yesterday with one of my type one friends here. And I was like, yeah, I'm recording for the Juicebox Podcast, where they're like, what, like, you talked about that all the time, you're gonna be on it. And I was like, Yeah, I actually got to meet Scott. So it's kind of funny. It's a full circle. moment. And I feel like you just you give people the permission to do those things that doctors don't, you know, tell you. And it's weird, because it's so simple. But it's like, if you don't see other people doing it, you don't think there's any other way? So it's just, it's crazy to me?

Scott Benner 8:46
No, I mean, it's, well, it definitely works. And there's often times that I just feel like my job is like, I'm like the excited coach on the sideline to smash on the acid, you're running away and goes, you can do it, get it, you know, like, go get them. It's just sometimes like you said, it's just the idea that I thought these were the rules. And it turns out, there are no rules, really. And I could try things that make sense to me. That's one of the one of the the speed bumps that I see people get stuck on. It's most heartbreaking to me is the idea of the ones who saw it, and knew they were doing the wrong thing. And almost could imagine the right thing, but just did not have the nerve to break free of what they were being told to try it once. And that to me is like I don't know, like, like, imagine, imagine you're in a room with a closed door. And on the other side of the door is the love of your life. And someone tells you you're not allowed to open that door, and you take that seriously. But every day you have this feeling like the person I'm meant to be with forever is on the other side of this door and you find out five years later, it's true. And somebody else walks in and says you could just go out and open the door. It's no big deal and you owe Open it, and there they are. And now you've lost these five years right of, and you knew you knew what to do. And there's a loss in that feeling that I don't like to know that people go through makes me upset.

Raquel 10:13
Um, I see. Yeah. Especially, just Yeah, all the people I meet, but even with their kids, they, they just want to follow what the doctor is saying, which I totally understand. But it's so sad to think that the doctor's advice could be hurting them more than just, you know, listening to the community or other ways or thinking outside of

Scott Benner 10:31
the box. So we're embracing common sense. A lot of times. Yeah, I know, you know, like, I mean, you really, really stopped to think about what I say sometimes on the podcast, like at some points, I'm like, if you Bolus for something, your blood sugar goes up, and never comes back down. Next time, I Bolus more is that like, earth shattering ideas really, like you know, like, and I know, I've usually I used to break it down by saying like, you know, if you if you learn to drive, and someone told you never push the brake down more than halfway, and you were coming towards a tree or a wall, and you press the brake down halfway, and you still were like, Oh, I'm going to hit the tree? Would you actually say to yourself, I guess I could push harder on this break thing, but the guy told me not like, no, yeah, you'd be like, Oh, God, I gotta stop, you'd push harder. And it really, it's all we're talking about is just finding the right amount of insulin, insulin for the scenario that you're in. I Met Your Mother, why did I meet your mother's?

Raquel 11:31
Yeah, so so I was there. Like I said, I'm from Dallas, I was staying with her. And I actually had a booth for my company type one together at the summit. And so she was just really excited to see me doing that there. And it's a fairly new business. And so yeah, she was there just supporting me and meeting some of my friends. And she got to meet you, too, which is pretty cool. Your mom

Scott Benner 11:54
is an unpaid intern is what you're telling me? Oh, yeah, basically, it's perfect. You're probably an unpaid intern most days, right? Oh, yeah. All the days. So you were you were talking to me? At the time? If I'm correct. About, was it a babysitting thing you were trying to set up?

Raquel 12:12
Yeah. So basically. So to go back a little bit, when I was in college at UT Austin, I was part of the college diabetes network chapter and three, that connected a lot of jdrf. And they would always forward us, you know, all the parents that were looking for babysitters, because college age kids are perfect for that. And I started just kind of meeting all these people in the community and then connecting all these families to other friends that I had with type one who could babysit when I wasn't available. So it became this thing that I was just kind of doing on the side and just saw how much of a need it was, you know, these parents literally hadn't hadn't gone on dates in months, or ever since their child was diagnosed. And it was just heartbreaking. And just having someone there that knew how to get the insulin and do all the things met so much like some of them could go and not even look at their phone, not even look at the Dexcom they could just trust that we knew what we were doing and everything would be fine. So it kind of inspired me to start typing together, which originally was a babysitting connection service for type one family. So I was in Dallas and Austin at the time that we met. And but I launched in November of 2019. So it was a little bit before COVID, I was starting to get momentum there. But then when COVID hit obviously, things just got really complicated on the babysitting side. And there's already a lot of liability because you think babysitting, and then diabetes, and then COVID. And so it just got to be really challenging. And I sort of decided, let me just put that to the side, at least for now. And my true passion. And something I've wanted to do for so long is provide resources to parents and a lot of other ways. Because through babysitting, I started to kind of informally coach a lot of these parents on their child's management because they'd be gone for hours. And I'd have their kids at, you know, at 100 for a while. And when I'm not there, they're, you know, on the roller coaster. So I would start to you know, get coffee with them and talk to them about different methods that honestly, you've you've probably taught me most of them.

Scott Benner 14:15
Yeah, charging people for this because I would like a piece of it. I'm just kidding. What I said, are you people for this? Because I'd like a piece. Yeah, I'll see what I can do. So 10% Yes. Um, so you would talk to them and say, Look, I my imagination says they get home and they're like, wait, why is this kid's blood sugar normal when we're not with him? And this girl leaves and everything goes to hell again.

Raquel 14:44
Yeah, basically, and a lot of it really did come down to fear of, you know, well, the doctor says I should do this. And I'm just nervous to go outside of that, but I would just encourage them to like, make little adjustments slowly and eventually they realize like you said, if you can be at a straight line It 200 and you can be in a straight line at 131 20. so on. So, um, then I kind of shifted years and we have a few really fun products. So we make these diabetes, I actually have a cousin who crochets, these really cute stuffed animals. So we collaborated and we now make these diabetes that have insulin pumps and CGM 's on them. So you can customize like a unicorn, that was our first one we have dinosaur, we have a little penguin that we just did for winter time. And they have a shark. So basically, you can choose whatever devices you want, whatever colors you want, and you can customize all that. And then she'll make it individually, which is really fun. And then recently, I launched a program called Living type one together, which, by the time this comes out, who knows what we'll be doing, but right now we have a three month program set up for parents of type one kids, basically, so that I can, it's a group program. So we have calls each week, and then I have an RD on my team. So we had the nutrition side there, she's a professional, she also has type one, and then I sort of you know, I don't I'm not a doctor, not gonna ever claim that I am. But I do think I have a lot to share from my 19 years of experience. So we do that. And then we have individual calls with the families as well as group calls. So they get the community aspect. And then we have some guest speakers like endocrinologist CDs, things like that. So basically, the goal here is just to fill the gap between endocare and like real life, because, you know, they just don't always look at the whole picture. Like how are your emotions affecting everything? How you know, your stress levels, what you're eating? And, yeah, I don't know where exactly we're going. We have a really cool launch coming out soon. It'll probably be out. By the time this comes out, but, but I'll keep that a surprise. So

Scott Benner 16:42
yeah, so you're just trying to just trying to put good stuff out in the world and see what happens.

Raquel 16:47
Basically, I don't really know what I'm doing. But at the same time, I feel like I'm moving in the right direction. And, you know, I've already connected with so many cool families. And so if this doesn't work out, that is what it is. But I'm trying

Scott Benner 17:00
No, that's a, that's really all you can do. I have to say, just this week, I recorded with someone who I had, I asked to come on because they were misdiagnosed for a number of years. And then they found the podcast before their type one diagnosis was completely made. And so they never had. They never had like any time where they were truly, you know, diagnosed as type one where they didn't understand what the podcast was talking about. And so I said, you know, could you come on and explain to me, like, what what you got out of that. And, you know, I asked her to come on, because part of me wants her to explain it so that the people listening can have a firm grasp of what the podcast could possibly do for different people with different situations. But there's the other part of me that just wants her to explain to me what the podcast is. Because I think like you and probably like a lot of people, I started a thing with an idea in my head. And I'm just, I'm lucky it, it caught on. Because a lot of people start a lot of things that just don't resonate, you know, and there's no real rhyme or reason for that. It's not like you can go figure out what did or didn't work. And, but the podcast has become more than I anticipated. And like sometimes every once in a while I need someone to come tell me what it is to them so that I can almost understand what it is on shepherding if that makes sense. It's

Raquel 18:31
Oh, it does. Like even if I just I talked to a newly diagnosed family, like literally they're a week in and they're like, yeah, I left the hospital without learning how to give an injection. I don't know what I'm doing. I need to talk to someone every day like I you know, and it's like, Okay, this is why I'm trying to do this this is it's just that reminder of like, Okay, what I'm doing is meaningful because when you're putting stuff out all the time it kind of feels like okay, is this doing anything like spending so much time on this but um, but yeah, I totally get what you're saying

Scott Benner 19:02
contents are really interesting. Making air quotes with my fingers which is odd because this is audio you can't sue the business to be in because you can put great content out and just nobody finds it or or you can delude yourself into believing nobody finds it and it turns out they found it and they don't like you. You know what he means like already they don't like that. There's a So recall I've done a number of things during the the the COVID crisis and I just tried to teach myself some new stuff along the way I taught myself how to make like handmade pizza dough that you know you cold ferment for days and you know you cook it a certain way and I at this point now make a pizza as good or better than the ones you can buy in my area which is saying something because I actually live in, I live in. I live in a place where the two most popular pizza establishments in New Jersey exist. And my wife the other day, Kelly, the person I've been married to, for almost 25 years said to me, your pizza is better than the ones we buy. And Kelly's not saying nice things to me easily. So she must, like she wouldn't like a lot of you're out there, like, Oh, I told my husband all the time, he does stuff nice and makes him feel better. My wife never does anything just to make me feel better. So it's, you know, we've known each other too long. So she believes this, which is lovely. I taught myself how to smoke barbecue, I, and now I'm teaching myself to fly a drone. So I bought a really inexpensive drone, somebody gave it to me for Christmas. And I'm like learning how to do it. So I go and look for videos, because I have a real spatial issue. Like once I'm not line of sight with something. I struggled to orient it, you know what I mean? Like, like, I'm not great at video games. And so anyway, so I'm trying to watch these. Here's the point, I'm watching these videos. Okay, Jesus recall, I got wordy there. And there's this guy that makes these videos about flying, the specific one that I have. And his content is fantastic. He's not particularly pleasant to look at. And his voice is grading. But the content is rock solid, right? And so I watch his videos, but his counts is like, you know, his views on YouTube? are, they're paltry compared to other people who are putting out similar videos with not nearly as good content in it. And

Raquel 21:39
that's the game though, you have to figure out how do you get in front of the right people? I'm learning that very fast. Like, it's not half of the battle is what are you offering? But that's almost the easy part. It's like, how do you get how do you get people to find you?

Scott Benner 21:51
And, and the truth is, you can't, you're my opinion, I don't think you can get people to find you. I think you and this is just my opinion, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe there might be some like brilliant marketer out there. But I think you make a thing. And that thing resonates or it doesn't. If it does, someone will tell someone else about it. And you can't force them to tell someone else about it. Yes, absolutely. Yeah, get doing a giveaway, you know, like, tweet about me or tell a friend and we're gonna give away, it doesn't work. Like that's the value, do you throw the dice, and they land on your number? Or they don't? And that's how I've come to think of it. And I mean, like I said, there might be some maxwellian way to trick people into doing a thing. But is that really who you want? You know, like, I think that's so true. I think I could hire someone who understood marketing, right? And I could probably, I could probably double the downloads of the podcast if I did that. But then who is it that's listening? It's not people who care. It's not people who are right, you want

Raquel 23:00
the people that want to be there that really value your content? Yeah, no, you're 100%, right,

Scott Benner 23:05
because those people build a core. Because they really want to be there. They really, genuinely want need or enjoy what you're doing. And that creates, I mean, in the, in the short, you know, to say, really quickly, we're like, you have to have a long view of things. My opinion, like you can't, like get rich quick, or make this work real fast. It just flames out too much. Like, I think if you really look around the diabetes community, and say to yourself, who's generating content in 2021, who was generating content in 22,007, I've got to be one of the only ones. So you've definitely done the long game. So that's that's to me is the idea. And that's how now so the podcast aside, that's how you really generate content that helps people write because it's solely focused on them, not on the the growth of the thing you're doing. So that's why that's my advice. It's not great advice for people who'd like to, you know, pay a bill anytime in the next 10 years. But, you know, I did know, I know, it's a slow process. Yeah, I did this for 789 10 1112 I'm counting 13 the most exciting thing to do on a podcast 14. I did this for nine years in writing, and rebuked every offer I ever got for any kind of ad. I would always say No, thank you. At one point, when I was writing, this is you know, so many generations of leadership ago on the pod tried to give me Arden's on the pods for free. And I was like No, thank you. That's like, I I'd rather not like I'd rather just keep our relations Ship separate. And, you know, I'll write for your blog. But I don't want, like, you know, I don't I don't want that. And it was a really kind thing they were, you know, at the time that I don't even know if it was an offer. They were trying to figure out how to do it. I you know, and I was like, No, no, again, I know, other content providers back then that were wearing pumps for free and everything. And I was like, I don't want that. And then I, you know, I was like, Can we give it away to like, less fortunate person? And believe it or not, legally, that was so incredibly impossible to do. I couldn't make that happen. Yeah, so

Raquel 25:34
Well, that's nice. And yeah, I think, you know, I definitely work a lot of other jobs. And I yeah, I have a long vision for this. And like you said, if it brings value people great, and if not, it doesn't, but you know, a lot of is just listening to what people need and responding to that, which I think you've done a really great job of, too.

Scott Benner 25:54
Thank you. And I think too, you have to think of it as like, it's like you started out day trading with $100. Right? Like, if you can make $120 you know, if you can turn your 100 into 120, it's a massive growth increase. If you step back and go, I have $120, that doesn't seem very exciting. But if you can think I increase my my money here by a fifth. That's exciting, then you got to remember the next time you increase it, you might increase it to $140. And, and you have to be willing to go at that pace. Like I'm telling you. My blog used to get 100 150 clicks a month, when I first made it, like 100. Like, imagine what that must have been? What do you think like, maybe 10 people were reading the blog, you know? Yeah. And now, the truth is, now I get millions of clicks on my blog. And I'm like, I don't even worry about it. I don't even think about it. Like when we when I sell ads at the end of the year. Some people are like, Can we get an ad on the blog? And I was like, What do you want that for the podcast? Where do you want your ad? They're like, no, we'd like a clickable ad on the blog, too. And I'm always like, Alright, whatever. And they're just again, I'm like, Yeah, okay. And then one day, I was talking to somebody who does web work, and they're like, you know, you have one of the most popular diabetes blogs in the world. I was like I do. I don't even know. Oh, my God. I'm just like, really, she's like, you could really be selling those. And I was like, that's fine. Like, it should just be a benefit of being

Raquel 27:29
thought about that. Right? Like, I think we both had the same goal in mind. Like we both I definitely I hate even asking for money truthfully, like, I want to do all this for free. I think it's just about helping people. But at the end of the day, I hope that this can be full time so that I can impact more people. So that that takes the money.

Scott Benner 27:47
No, that eventually it certainly does. Like I don't want you to take me the wrong way. If If someone contacted me tomorrow and they're like I am a beneficiary and I would like to you know, buy you Facebook ads or we have a way to grow your podcast where we can find people who really need it. I would want to hear about that. You know like because really until you until you see someone life change like dramatically and drastically for the better in a short amount of time and it stays that way. That's a very it's a lovely feeling. And then you start and then that next thought ends up being there are so many other people who didn't have this benefit. I wonder how I could at least offer it to them and whether they take it or not, I guess is on them but but I'd like to be able to show them that it exists.

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Just the last reminder T one d exchange.org. forward slash juicebox. You're a US resident with type one or a US resident who cares for someone with Type One Diabetes. This will take you less than 10 minutes easily. You can do it from from your your sofa, your kitchen table, on your phone, your laptop, your computer, anywhere you reach the internet, really T one d exchange.org forward slash juicebox get there, complete the survey. And that's it. You've helped people with type one through Type One Diabetes Research and you've supported the Juicebox Podcast. There are links to all the sponsors at Juicebox Podcast comm or right there in the show notes of the podcast player you're listening in now. Please tell me you're subscribed in that podcast player to right, you've hit subscribe. Please do if you haven't. Alright, let's get back to Raquel and let them decide. You know, there there are people who, who will tell me that I've actually received notes. I've heard from people, it'll say that if I listen to this podcast, my Awan CEO blah, blah, blah, and you know everything. I don't have time for that. Can you just tell me what to do? Oh, my gosh, yeah, yeah, I can tell you what to do. You listen to the podcast? You put out? Yeah, that's all I have for you. You only come live with you. The guest. Not sure. Although I joked recently that for the right amount of money, I would come to your house and live with you in fiction, but it would be a lot of money. You know, I'd have to abandon my family for a couple of weeks. But seriously, though, it's just that feeling is great. And I think if you have that in you, like if you have the desire to help people, and you have a message that resonates, and you have the patience to grow it, you will end up helping a lot of people. Yes, I agree. And you're a young person, too. Right? How old are you? Yes, I just turned 2014. I was very young. Yes, I know. You're like five in my life?

Raquel 31:37
No, I know. I'm young. I like I've always had a very, like, entrepreneurial kind of mindset. I guess. So. Were you trying?

Scott Benner 31:49
When you were four, where you're like you can you could use this crop to grow flower. That entrepreneurial? Not quite. Can I? Yeah. I have a question. I want to take a little bit of a detour here. Texas, in general does not seem to what is the word I'm looking for? They don't it doesn't seem to as a state be treating COVID-19 the same as other places are? What's the experience living there right now?

Raquel 32:20
Yeah, I mean, honestly, things are very open. We're back, I think 50% capacity for most businesses. But it kind of feels like normal life. Like at least if you're driving around or something like there's traffic again, because Austin traffic is the absolute worst. And you just have to wear a mask everywhere, I think. Yeah, it's it's definitely a weird time in Dallas. It's about the same. I think, here people are a little bit more like aware of it and conscious of it. So I think the cases in Dallas are actually getting worse. But I don't know, it's I haven't been anywhere else since all this started. And so there was a time period, obviously, when everything was shut down. And we were you know, completely at home. But now things are pretty open. I actually do marketing for cycling studio in town. And so I get free classes there. And I haven't been going lately, but I mean, we're at 50% capacity. So that's 22 bikes in a room, you don't have to wear the mask while you're on the bike. But when you're off you do and you know, the classes are filling up. So it's pretty interesting.

Scott Benner 33:25
So when you're really huffing and puffing, you do not need to cover your face, but when you're just breathing normal. You got it. So I'm understanding okay. totally makes sense. Because it seems to me that it's like that's the word on Texas. It's it's pretty wide open. But that cases are pretty high there. Right?

Unknown Speaker 33:44
They are. Yeah, yeah.

Scott Benner 33:45
So it's you. That state has embraced the, we're just gonna see what happens model, I guess.

Raquel 33:53
Yeah, I think they've said they're not like we're not going to shut down everything again. So.

Scott Benner 33:58
So what does that feel like? What does that feel like to you internally? Like are you do you walk outside and think all these I'll just bleep this out later. But all these motherfuckers are dirty and I'm gonna die or like, or do you just feel like do you feel like oh, this is working out? Okay. And like how do you feel about COVID being young and having tight bonds so

Raquel 34:19
I want to be really conscious for other people's sake Truthfully, I think for myself, in my honest opinion, I take really great care of my blood sugar's Of course, that does not guarantee anything, but I feel like I have a strong body to be able to find it if I were to get it, but I want to be careful. So you know, I feel like I'm in that middle stage where I'm like, Okay, I'm going to go to the grocery store when I need to go like I'm not ordering stuff online. But I'm not going out just to go out and I've never been someone that like really loves like going to bars a lot or things like that. And so most I think bars are closed still. Even here, but But yeah, I don't know. I feel relatively safe, but like I was just home with my family for a long time. And so before that, you know, being extra cautious, but really I'm I'm just being cautious in general, if that makes sense. But like we have a dog park in my apartment, I take my dog out there and like, I stay far away from people. We're all outside and I feel fine. Your dog,

Scott Benner 35:15
your apartment has a dog park.

Raquel 35:17
Yeah, it has a dog park in the middle, we have two buildings. And it's very like people move here for this dog park. Because so many people go out there. It's like all fenced in. And I resigned again for next year. And I honestly did that mostly because of the dog park because my dog needs to run around. Like he has so much energy. And it's I love working out but not necessarily going on like multiple hour long walks every day. So

Scott Benner 35:44
that's fancy as well. I was thinking, I was like, I didn't get any apartment I lived in when I was your age. Yeah, it's the pool. We couldn't always women. You know what I mean? Like it was? Yeah, it was weird. Okay, well, I didn't mean to it's, I apologize if I felt like if I could put you on the spot. And and no one wants to say the wrong about COVID. Because someone will call you a COVID denier? And you'll you know, they'll try to cancel you. But no, I think that's a very reasonable response. And I just wondered what it was like, in a place where they were just like, that's it, we're all opening back up again, go. Like, I wonder what that felt like, versus it's funny, I have the same feeling like, I don't believe there's anything I can't do at this point. But we're just kind of meaningfully meaning on purpose, staying away from other people. Like just sort of like living your life, but then going home. And it's done the weirdest thing to my perception of time. And my understanding of what like, like my body and my brain would get accustomed to like, I now see how I could, like, just call this reality. And I'd be okay with it. And it's normal. It's interesting how adaptive we are.

Raquel 37:00
You know, yeah, and then should to see when we get to go back when we'll get to conferences again, because that's the biggest thing I miss is just seeing my friends, like, I'll go on walks with people, but that's about it. So

Scott Benner 37:09
yeah. Well, no, I mean, there's a lot of people around the diabetes space, who really focus their efforts around those conferences and going to places to talk to people and you guys kind of, you know, I've seen people create a little cabal of friendship, and, and I don't, I never use the conferences. I don't mean use, like, I never treated them that way. Like, those were just always extra things. I went and did. That, to me the podcast is the thing. But but it's uh, it's nice. Like I saw, there's like, Oh, you guys have like a whole group of people who knew each other. And, yeah, it was nice.

Raquel 37:48
It really was. It is a really cool community. Because Dallas just tends to be one of the bigger conferences and so a lot of people will be flown in like you were or, you know, however it works, they'll come to speak. And so it just kind of works out a lot of people get to meet from the online space in person there. And I've been to the Dallas on a few times. I feel like I got to meet a lot of like, awesome people in the community.

Scott Benner 38:08
Yeah, I feel very invisible at them. I don't imagine anyone like, I don't know if that's true or not. But when I get there, I just feel like I'm wallpaper and then I just show up and stand up in the front of the room and I leave. But

Raquel 38:22
I feel like people know, but they know your boys like I don't know if people maybe I don't know, because they know what you look like. But I feel like the older like people my age don't listen to the podcast as much, which is interesting. Like, you definitely have more of a parent audience, I would assume. So it's not but I'm the crazy person that's always like Juicebox Podcast.

Scott Benner 38:41
Thank you. It's not it's actually it's not about the people who listen are not broken down by parent or adult with type one. But I would agree with you that younger people, generally speaking are probably the least of the audience. I think the audience sweet spots between like 28 and like 55 in there. Yeah, it's it's so it's not it's funny. It's not. There are as many if not maybe more, like people living with type one listening as there are parents. But the parents are more vocal online, then Oh, yeah. That's right. And, and younger people in general. I think that's the time where you're not paying attention to your health the way you should be. Maybe. I don't know.

Raquel 39:36
Yeah, I think people just think they're invincible and you know, yeah, I mean, I didn't like I didn't get a duck's calm till I was a sophomore in college and so many people wanted me to but I was just like, no, like, I don't you know, you just don't know what you're missing honestly. And it kind of makes it feel like you don't like you don't know what's going on. Right? So it's like not happening. I'm in my my body. definitely gotten used to just being hired before that time. And so I think if people aren't in the community, they're less likely to have Dexcom. I definitely noticed that unless and you know, I think those are starting to or CGM in general, I think endos are starting to push them more. But before it was kind of like if you didn't have if you weren't, if you weren't in the community, if you didn't know that people would type one, like, you're just kind of like, Oh, I use shots, I do whatever. And it's not, you don't really think twice about it. And so I think that was definitely me for a really long time. And then once I started to get more involved, I was like, oh, like these people are actually paying attention to what their blood sugar's are doing. Like maybe I should do that.

Scott Benner 40:36
Well, I can tell you interesting. I'm not a doctor for certain but I can tell you one thing 100% sure about your your health. pretending it's not happening is not a valid a viable way to magic. I don't look it's not there definitely doesn't work. It also doesn't work with serial killers in your closet, by the way, they're going to come in.

Raquel 40:59
exactly when it's scary that your body will adapt whatever is going on with your blood sugar's you'll start to just feel normal, and then you think you're fine. Because you're like, Oh, I feel fine. So I'm fine. But

Scott Benner 41:09
you're not, it's really, it's really your body trying to stay alive as long as it can. That's what it's doing. It's like, Alright, I'll give up on that. And I'll, I'll move the, you know, I'll move some soldiers over here. And you know, but eventually, it is the thing that gets you Whatever it is, you're ignoring your body will do an amazing job of keeping you going through it, but eventually, you can ignore it forever. And you know, it will, it will follow you at some point. I also think that people your age, and I only mean this in the nicest way. When it what I want to say the idea of the diabetes online community, right? Is, is lovely, and valuable. And also in some ways. It's, it's no, it's not real. Because, because if, if I said to you, in any other walk of life, let's just pick a number. Here are 1.8 million people who enjoy cheese, okay? And, and 40,000 of them have an online presence where they talk about their love of cheese, this is the one line cheese community, they really represent. percentage wise, none. Almost none of the 1.8 million cheese lovers. Like there are 1.7 5 million other cheese lovers who do not go on Instagram, don't go on Facebook, and are still loving cheese in a way that you would you would just respect. And that so that's the interesting thing to me is that is that online feels like the place, but it really is just a small segment of people. Yes, that of the of the bigger number. And I probably used to think like that more to until the podcast, because now I can see the podcast downloads. And I can see the interaction online. And the amount of people listening versus the amount of people who say something on Facebook or Instagram. There's a huge, huge difference between those. Yeah, right.

Raquel 43:28
Yeah. And so I mean, I didn't think it was cool to be like, like, for a long time. I was like, Why are there people posting out diabetes? Like, why are people going diabetes events, my mom used to try to drag me to the summit when I was younger, and I refused. So I was like you like want to talk about but I mean, I've seen it make a difference once I started actually meeting people in person. Like that's really the only reason I do it. Like I kind of hate social media, but at the same time, I've actually met really cool people, you know, gotten to do really cool things with them and learned a lot from it more importantly, so that's where it's meaningful to me But yeah, you kind of have to get past that weirdness and honestly, like I have a normal Instagram account and then I type one account and whenever my normal friends normal, you know what I mean? Whenever they find my diabetes account, I'm just like, Oh gosh, why are they gonna follow this? Like they're gonna think it's so boring and whatever but it's cool because a lot of them find it so interesting and it's just such a weird disease to have it's so intricate and people don't realize that so can we

Scott Benner 44:25
start going those other people normally pancreas is that yes, there we go. are normally pancreas to people. But not but don't get me wrong. I please don't. I think it's amazing. I think it's fantastic. And there's a part of me that wishes you could spread it to those other 1.7 million people. But the truth is, those people aren't interested in that, like social media in general is fascinating in that. In that we see like Twitter, running politics, sometimes it feels like right, but the percentage of people on Twitter versus the percentage of people alive is very, very small in, but they have, they appear to have a voice. But the truth is they don't. It's just it's just Anyway, I'm mixing my metaphors here a little bit. But I, my goal has always been to reach people who aren't online. And somehow the podcast has done that, let and so that to me is, is, um, is a real accomplishment. Because those were people who were never going to hear these stories. And so they were just gonna slog along doing what they were doing. You can have an amazing Instagram presence. But you're really, I mean, even think about like, if you got an Instagram picture, and you put it up, what's a lot of like, what's that amount of likes? That makes you go? Oh, holy hell Look at this.

Raquel 45:55
Yeah, I mean, it just really depends on you. on you, right? Count number. Yeah. And on you. But no, I, I totally see what you're saying. That's actually what I was talking about earlier, when you're talking about typing together. I was like, you have to get in front of the right people. It's like Instagram, isn't that you know what I mean? Like, I really realized that over the last few months, like, why am I focusing so much energy on social media, when it's like, you know, these people are getting diagnosed in the hospital, they're not finding these accounts right away. They need, you know, this needs to be in the doctor's office, this needs to be, I don't know, I'm working on that. But like, that's where the real difference when you're actually going to be making a difference in people's lives. Because the truth is, all the people that are connected there, they are connected, they already see all the things, even they don't know everything. It's like they see other people managing different ways. And you know, once you're in it, you're already in it. And so you're only helping those people so much, just like you're saying, so how do you find those people that are outside of that bubble?

Scott Benner 46:45
May I make a suggestion? Because I've been on your website, and those crochet dolls are really adorable. Okay, so thank you, please, I make 1234 510 as many as I can afford to give away. And I, I make a phone call. I talked to the endocrinology department at some major hospitals around the country. And I say I have this doll. And I'd like to donate it for you to give to a newly diagnosed person. And yes, I actually am on that. Yeah, that's 100%. What I would do, I don't have to put as much effort into it. Because what I get to do is I get to tell people Hey, like, tell your doctor about it. And then the doctor listens and the doctors like, Huh, and then the doctor starts telling us about it. I get my smile. That's amazing. Yeah, my word of mouth is easier. But your thing would could do that. You know, you could find yourself going. Oh, yeah,

Raquel 47:39
I'm working on that. I'm in touch with an endo. So I feel good. I'm on a good path. And hopefully, yeah, it'll just keep going. I have a lot of exciting things. So

Scott Benner 47:49
I like how good you know, I like your energy and your intent a lot. So no, please you don't thank me. I'm just thank me. I just did do like I like it. I think I think you're on the right path. I want to see you succeed with it. And, and reach some people because I think you're gonna make a big difference. So I appreciate it. No, I'm listening. I'm gonna get old at some point, you guys, I got a I mean, how much longer you gonna let me do this, like when I'm 60. And I'm like, today, I helped Arden give birth to her first child, and we kept our blood sugar stable, like, like, at some point, you're gonna be like, I can't How long has this guy been making this podcast? I gotta get. So tell me something about that, too. Because you said at the beginning. I listened to a couple of episodes because I haven't listened to as much lately. What's that? Like? Because I imagine when you first found it, you were listening a lot,

Raquel 48:38
right? Oh, yeah. Every single episode. Um, yeah, I still like listening. But yeah, I think now I definitely listen more for just hearing people's perspectives on things and different stories versus like, all the info and tips that you're giving to people directly. So I yeah, I think it's like you get to a point where like, okay, I kind of have this figured out, I'm in a flow that. And you learn things here and there. But, but you kind of have it figured out. So I guess I'm in that place.

Scott Benner 49:10
Now. That's, that's where I want you to be. That's where I want. I still want you to stay. Subscribe in your podcast app and download the app. But but that's what that's my hope for everybody. It's funny. You have to be in a mindset where you realize that this resets constantly. And yeah, and it does, like I will. I am right now in contact with people online, who are fervent about the podcast, I love them. And they don't realize that six months from now, I will be in contact with somebody online who's fervent about the podcast that is not them. And that it just there it's like snakeskin, it just keeps shedding. People come in, they get what they need. And then they become you know, infrequent listeners, or they hit certain episodes, but they get what they need out of it and they move on to me That's the goal. And the problem, I think, in social media, specifically, is that your goal can't be too. So, so stop for a second, instead of thinking of the podcast, as I'm hoping to find a person who needs help give them enough information that they can go live normally. Think of it as, like a business, like take the diabetes out for a second. What business finds a customer? gives them something they want? has them really enjoy it. And their end goal is for them to stop buying it. No business has that angle, right. So these, the delivery system that people are using, is not right, for the, for the for the process, the process wants you to be able to find educate, pass on back to life. But if your social media followers leave you, then your social media becomes less powerful. And then you cycle out and someone else comes back. And it's a it's a weird hump to get over in your head that you have to want these people to age out. where some people Yeah, but

Raquel 51:18
there's always new ones coming into right.

Scott Benner 51:20
Well, that's the that's the sad part. Yes, but But yeah, there's always new people getting type one diabetes. But what I see sometimes not from you, obviously. But what I see sometimes is that people instead of selling like if, again, thinking about it as merchandise instead of selling good information that gets you out of it, they sell fear that keeps you there. Yeah. Yeah, that happens too frequently. And it takes a special person like you to not want to, like not to not be so inner focus that you're like, why I've captured this listener now, or this reader or this person, I need to keep them here. I need to keep them here. And I don't want that I want the opposite. I want you to come and like just go away. Like I want everyone to have the experience I had the other night where Arden had like a massively weird blood sugar thing. And I could have managed it while riding a unicycle and juggling like it just it's just, you know, I mean, it happens for you, I imagine just, you know, you just know what to do. So, right. Did your mom like me?

Raquel 52:29
Yes, she's excited actually called her this morning. I didn't know if we were gonna talk about my diagnosis story, but I was like, can you please tell me like, what it was because I know it. But I also like, forget all the little details that She's so excited. I was just gonna record Finally, I was five. team and I kind of had a weird, a weird story because I actually got diagnosed in a really positive way. I just went to my normal five year old checkup. And they happen to like check something I don't know if it was like a urine sample are they actually pricked my finger, but I went home like everything. You know, they said it was normal, but they called her and they're like, oh, you're your child might have juvenile diabetes, which is what they used to call it. And they were like, bring her back tomorrow, but have her eat a really sugary breakfast before she comes. And so she was like, Okay, no problem, like gummy doughnuts or whatever. And went back tested again. And they're like, Alright, come back tomorrow fasted. So then I came back a third day without eating anything. And they were like, yeah, your child has type one. But there's no space in the hospital right now. So I went home for like a full two days without going to the hospital. I guess she doesn't remember my blood sugar was, but it wasn't super high yet. So I guess they weren't too concerned. And then I finally went to the hospital and was there for a few days. And it was right. Yeah, it was around my fifth birthday. So I had my birthday party scheduled. And my mom had been telling me all week long like, like, oh, you're going to get to go to the go to your birthday party. Like it's going to be so great. Like that was the one positive thing that was like coming up. And then apparently there's like a student doctor there that was working with us. And she told my mom like, sorry, she can't go to her birthday party. And so my mom was like begging my actual endo. She ended up being my endo for years and years. And she's like, Oh, yeah, you're fine. Like you guys are ready to go home. And so we left the hospital drove straight to my birthday party where I was late. Like all my friends are there whenever we were late to my fifth birthday party. And I remember still, I mean, I don't remember much but I remember having to get a shot at my birthday party was just so sad. But I had to like go into a separate room and you know, get my shot for my cake. So yeah, but it was actually it was good because now hearing all the stories of people just not knowing forever and ever. It's like why can't doctors just check blood sugar? It's not that hard. So

Scott Benner 54:48
what's interesting that they it's cool that they figured out there was nothing that led them to look it was just part of the process.

Raquel 54:54
Yeah, nothing she said she she kept trying to figure out like what, you know if there were signs that she Missed and there was nothing. I mean, I did have a virus the week before sometime around there that they think might have triggered it. Who knows. So I had been sick. But other than that I wasn't like carrying water.

Scott Benner 55:12
I don't want a lot of weight. So because lost weight was the one that popped into my head. Like maybe if you Excuse me, I'm dying here. Give me a second. Wow. That was the one that got me. Like, I wonder if maybe you were like, you know, 50 pounds the last time and we're like, 42. And they were like, Oh, you know, but they that's the only thing I can think of. That's just a good office that's checking for things. I guess. Oh, excellent. Yeah, lucky. Lucky. Yes. It feels lucky, doesn't it? Yeah. Lucky, so lucky. I just, um, I like the idea of you like breaking out of the hospital and like going right to a birthday party. It's baller, you know,

Raquel 55:51
yeah, it's pretty great. I'm surprised I didn't just cancel it when all that was going on. But she just, she was telling you this morning. She just wanted me to have that so badly. She was like, I told the doctor, even if we just go to the party and come back, like she has to have this because I'd had the worst week. And the other thing I do remember is asking my mom in the hospital if I was gonna have to get shots for the rest of my life, which I think that was like her worst moment of her life having to tell me Yes. And I was really scared of shots like before, that would be like running away from the nurse. You know, if I was just getting a flu shot or something, like always terrified of needles, and honestly, it didn't get better. For a while. Like I remember every sight change was painful. I feel so bad looking back and like seeing other parents go through the same thing with their kids. I did not make it easy for my parents at all.

Scott Benner 56:37
But a little Listen, try to imagine a three year old Arden with my personality, and a three year olds body is running from shots. Because what happened here all the time, I'd be like, hey, Arden, we just have to give me insulin, she'd look at me and smile and take off. Oh, yeah. Like get back here. And you're so nervous about the whole thing. You're like, this isn't gonna be enough insulin or it's gonna be too much. And, you know, the next hour is gonna be terrible. And our blood sugar's gonna get really low, and I'm gonna be testing all the time. I don't want to test her all the time. And meanwhile, she's being adorable. You know, and you're just like,

Raquel 57:07
I think it's worse for parents. Sometimes. I really do. I mean, it definitely sucks being type one, but like, wow, yeah, the parents are the real. We call them super parents in my, in Taiwan together, we always say they see your parents because they, you just worked so hard. Listen,

Scott Benner 57:23
I'm gonna say this again. Cuz I don't think people are listening. Here's the worst mistakes you can make in life. Buy a dog. That's horrible. have kids get married? Now? Here's why. The dog is just obvious. One day, you're gonna want to do something and you can't because you know, the dog can't come or you can't leave the dog somewhere for so long. It literally changes the course of your life. I love my dogs, not enough to make up for the kennel costs and the amount of times I've picked dog crap off of the floor. And you know, because like, yeah, like you like, you know what I'm going to sleep in tomorrow. Like, Let me treat myself and sleep till nine o'clock and at 830 the dogs just like, Hey, he's usually down here by now. Hmm, I'm just gonna leave this here. Okay, so that that's the first thing. No dogs right. Now, can you get great joy out of dogs? Of course you can. But that's not what we're talking about right now. Children. Okay, you are going to love that kid in a way that is in comparable to anything that you've experienced yet recall. Okay? And their pain. And their struggle will hit you a million times over, it will burden you in your heart. And in your mind, it will kill you to see them in pain. And once you love them, you can't get out of it. Because it's illegal to kill people. Do you understand? Plus, you love them so much you couldn't do it anyway would make you too upset. So the problem is now you've made the baby, it's out. The fun part with the sex is long forgotten. And now this kid is perfect. And even when they're perfect. You worry about them? What's their future going to be like? What are they going to do? Who are they going to meet is someone going to come along and you know, dissuade them from being themselves. But then you make them sick, you give them diabetes or something like that. And it's something you can't just make go away or fix. So worst feeling in the world. It is absolutely the worst feeling in the world. And then obviously my third thing being married is self explanatory. But I just say this because one day I imagined Kelly will listen to the podcast. But, but No, but seriously, like you when you create an attachment to a living thing. You're always letting it down after that, and to not joke too much about dogs. I've never wanted a dog because I feel very responsible for the dog. And then if I don't give the dog the best care that I can. It makes me feel badly. And therefore I know this seems backwards, but I'd never wanted As a dog because I didn't want the opportunity to let the dog down and for me to feel the way that makes me feel. And then that's how I feel about children except about a bazillion times more than that. So why do you say, Wait till some boy tricks you into making a baby? You'll think you're tricking him, but he'll be like, Oh, she can't go anywhere if she has a baby with me. But that's really not how it works either. But that's how stupid boys think that's a different problem. Okay, so are there any dumb boys in your life? Yeah, I've actually been with my boyfriend for seven years. Away from being married, and three years away from having a baby. We'll see. No, I know how this stuff goes. You think your life is random, but step back and look at everyone else's life. It's the way it goes. You're sweet. You're very kind. And you're hard working. Right? Pretty girl. What does this do for a living? What do we got him doing? Is he in college? Still? is he working?

Raquel 1:01:00
Um, he so he was working for a tech startup in Austin. But he did get laid off and is getting his real estate license. So that'll be interesting. Well,

Scott Benner 1:01:11
that's good. I'm glad he's having a problem working because that'll keep him from what no, lock you down. You don't I mean? Like, don't let him and by the way, don't let him give you some ring. If he doesn't have a good job. You understand? The place to live, you understand? It's clean. It's nice. We have upper mobility and a little bit of savings. Otherwise, no thank you, you and whatever his cute faces and why ever you like him? I don't know why. Exactly. And, you know, why do you like him?

Raquel 1:01:42
He's we just have so much fun together. We were best friends for a year before we started dating in high school. So I don't know just like having that friendship first. He's really hard working. He's also just more on the I guess mature side. Like we both are kind of like are we we're not like typical 20 year olds, I guess obviously, I've started a business young as people would say, but you know, we don't like love just going out and drinking. And I don't know, we like being more thoughtful with our time and doing more. I don't know how to put it in a way that people think is crazy. Right? We just we like a lot of the same things. We like going outside a lot, which Austin is grateful for. And yeah, we just have a lot of fun. And it's just nice that we've known each other for so long. So

Scott Benner 1:02:28
you both kind of have an old soul vibe. Because you do yes. There we go. Yeah, Yes, we do. Like I could talk to you and easily believe you're 50. And so, but not now, like you're you know, but there are times when I the things you do and the things that you listen, I appreciate that. I'm not a crazy person either. I don't. I don't have a problem with people who want to run around and party and do all this stuff. I just none of that occurs to me just like a Yeah, seems like a lot of effort. Like my excitement this week is that Kelly's birthday is on Sunday. And I've already made pizza dough to make her a pizza for her birthday. And to me that seems like you would appreciate that,

Unknown Speaker 1:03:07
right? Yes, absolutely. Meanwhile,

Scott Benner 1:03:10
you party girls out there and I know who you are. I talked to some of you moms. I know what you do. I know what you're doing. I see your high cheekbones. You would be like, Ah, so boring. But that's what I got. Yeah, that's what, what, uh, what seems right to me, Well, listen, obviously, you should do whatever you want, and I'm not in charge. But what I will tell you is that once you launch that boat in that direction, it keeps moving in that direction. So be sure you want to be on the SS. We're hitched and going to make a baby have a house before you get on to it you can't get on and get back off again. The worst you can do is like throw one of those orange rings around yourself and throw yourself into the water but that's not a way to live. So thank you yeah, you know I thank you you're like shut up idiot on the mic. You Really? Do you need advice on anything? It's fun. Anything else I could be nice I think I think you've given me lots of advice. Here my thoughts about sneakers and properly supporting your your arch. You want to hear about that? I'll save that for next podcast. tell you right now 20 years now when your feet hurt and you'll be like that guy probably had something to say about that and I wasn't listening Don't let your foot Don't let your feet be flat recount the understand ruin your life got

Unknown Speaker 1:04:24
it ruin your life.

Scott Benner 1:04:27
Is there a there's got to be something we didn't talk about that you were hoping to talk about?

Raquel 1:04:33
Um, no, I really I will say I was a dancer. I was a dance major in college and I went to performing arts high school free dance which definitely like also informed a lot of my just type one it was so hard dancing not much with type one and I still I still am a dancer but with COVID it's it's kind of slow down but just want to put that out there in case anyone who's this and has like a child who is a dancer because I'm always happy to to talk about that life.

Scott Benner 1:04:57
Let me ask you a question. So back then You're dancing, right? And it's before, you know, I'm assuming before your your ideas of how to manage your insulin were were rock solid. Yes. What do you do to drive your blood sugar up so that while you dance that came down and didn't go too low?

Raquel 1:05:14
Yeah, honestly, I think about that a lot. And like, how did I actually do that? I think I remember going to the side of the room and like pricking my finger all the time. This is before I had a CGM. And I'm sitting out quite often, because I had to drink juice or whatever. And luckily, I had really supportive teachers, but it definitely made it. It was just frustrating, because it's like, you know, especially like in front of a choreographer or something like that, if you're auditioning, and just not knowing if they if they're gonna see that am I going to have to run to the side. And that's going to be considered rude, you know, because you don't always get a chance to tell every single person that you're type one. Depending on the situation, even though I would be very upfront about it. And that was a big reason why I didn't want to go to CGM, because it would be more visible on my body. And you don't really want that to be seen in audition, because as much as you want to think that they're not considering that as a factor, like it's definitely it's there, you know what I mean? And like, like, no matter how good I am, like, there's still that question of will they take someone who's equally as talented, but doesn't have to sit out and miss some of the choreography or rehearsal time. So, um, you know, I don't really know, I always had a lot of juice and snacks with me. And somehow I made it work. But I really think I was just on the roller coaster all the time, because yeah, I would start to go up. And then I would come down and have to drink juice, and it's just that cycle. And then when I got to Dexcom, and I got the Apple Watch, that was really nice, because I could leave my stuff on the side of the room and still note my blood sugar was doing and so I started to like micro dosing things. While I would, you know, I'd have my pump off a lot of the time, pretty much all the time, unless I was doing like ballet, something that wasn't like super, like, you're not rolling around the floor, and like, running all over the place. But it would just be too hard to have my pump on and I have cracked my tea slim, before while dancing. So um, but I would start to like, you know, watch the arrows and my ducks calm during class. And then if I was starting to go up a little bit, I just rented side plug in my pump, give myself like point four or whatever it was I thought I needed and then run back. So I don't know, it was it was interesting. I was on the Medtronic 670 for a second did not go well. That's a whole nother story. But like, part of the problem was I wouldn't have my pump on all the time. And so it was like, I had to know in my brain, what am I doing right now? Am I going to be rehearsing for the next four hours? What am I eating today? Like taking all those factors into consideration? And then making the decision I need to give myself point seven not like, you know what my pump wants me to give me so yeah, it was it kind of forced me to, like, learn all that stuff in my brain and figure it out. But I definitely don't have it figured out like I still, you just you never know what's gonna happen. You know, you don't know. Yeah,

Scott Benner 1:07:51
I see people all the time. Like, you know, I my son eats apples with peanut butter before we play soccer. And I'm always like, I mean, I guess that that works. That's cool. But I always thought about it as like, how do I manipulate the sensation so that this doesn't happen? Like that was because I went through a number of really frightening lows with art. And when she was much younger, and I didn't know what I was doing, and we didn't have any technology. And one of them was outside of a dance class. And, you know, it was one of the times I was like, she's gonna die. Like, I am not going to catch this fast enough. And, you know, when it was over, I was like, and I knew she was okay. I was completely shaken. Like, I just, I it was, I felt like somebody was shooting at me. And like, it was my job to like, reach up and, like, slap the bullets down to they want to hit Arden. And it just felt like it went on forever. And it was one of the moments that made me think like, there's gotta be a better way to do this, like, this can't really be it, can it you know, like, we're gonna just gonna do this forever. And that's when I started thinking more about the insulin like, you know, there's got to be better ways to use this insulin than what we're doing right now. Don't get me wrong, you know, but I still like, you know, Arden's played softball and played four or five games in a day and stopped for lunch in the middle and you know, she go into a deli and grab a sandwich and soup and chips. And I just bought this for it and sent it back out there. And once you realize that, if you bounce the insulin with the food, it works out. It's just such a it's such a big lever freeing. Yeah. Because that other stuff is so goddamn scary. Like, it's just, oh, I can remember vividly how all that feels. And you know, people, I don't want people to feel that way. So anyway, Raquel, you are delightful. You were delightful when I met you. I really want to thank you for the ride to the airport and for not murdering me. That was lovely. Was there any thoughts of murdering me? In the Yeah, no, that'd be the time to say or did you ever consider kidnapping me or break I will tell you if I was to Wait now like you could just say, may I ask a question before I let you go? I'm sorry. How was it weird when I was like, Hey, can you take me there?

Unknown Speaker 1:10:10
Whoa, it wasn't weird. I

Raquel 1:10:12
mean, I don't think so. Because I, I mean, no, I feel this is weird. I'm sure a lot of people tell you this, but it's like, I feel like I know you a lot better than Of course, you know, me because I hear your voice all the time. Like, even when I've been on this podcast, it's not like, I'm hearing your voice. And I kinda had to remind myself like, I'm talking to him. I'm not just like, washing the dishes and listening to you talk. You know? So I feel like it wasn't that weird. I mean, we had talked all day. And I mean, you've done so much through my life, and I know so many others. And so, you know, I didn't mind at all.

Scott Benner 1:10:44
That was very nice. Yeah. I just wondered from your perspective, like, what's that? Like? Like, if you're in a different generation, like, even then, you know, asking you came because there was a group of people who all went to do something afterwards. And I was invited to come and then they were going to go to the airport afterwards. It's just like, and it seems like a lovely I don't remember what it was anymore. But it seemed lovely. And I was up for doing it. And then I just was like, No, just go the airport.

Raquel 1:11:13
tiring, like, I was so exhausted by the end of that day. I think they were all going to do something but my mom and I were just like, Alright, we're tired.

Scott Benner 1:11:22
Oh, my God, I know what it is. Are they gonna go throw axes? Oh, my, yeah. Am I right about that? Okay, so like, you know, in the middle of the day, when somebody's like, hey, when this is over, we're gonna throw axes and then go to the airport. I'm like, All right. Okay, you should come and I'm like, alright. And then by the end of the day, I'm like, No, I'm not doing that. Like, I just like, I want to throw my ass at a seat in the airport waiting for my plane. I don't want to throw it. I just want to go home. And cuz that was like, that's a long, it was a long flight for me. And oh, yeah, it was the first it was the last time I was ever on one of those big Airbus's. You know, the ones that are like, eight rows in the middle and three on either side. And it feels like you're in a mall that can fly. Have you ever been in one of those?

Raquel 1:12:10
I think so. Yeah. Giant one. Yeah, it's just mass and you lost your iPad, right?

Scott Benner 1:12:15
That's not true. Yeah, I mess up once a trip on something. That was the one when I got there. The the hotel was like, we don't have a credit card on file for you. I was like, well, you better contact the jdrf and get it. And they were, they were like, now you can just give us yours and get the money back from them. And I went, huh? Yeah, I'm not doing that. I'll go home first, just in case you're one. And not because of money. By the way Republic because I don't want to spend the next three months trying to get $150 back from somebody just it's Oh my god, it is my mind even thinking about doing paperwork like that. All right. You were terrific. what's your website?

Raquel 1:12:59
type one together calm and the one is O ne and spelled out?

Scott Benner 1:13:03
Could you be an all proper type one together? Calm? So it's

Raquel 1:13:09
the same on Instagram and Facebook? Just type one

Scott Benner 1:13:11
together? Not didn't work? Right. Like it's a it's not a not for profit? It's

Raquel 1:13:15
correct. I yeah. At least for now. Especially with the babysitting thing. It's just like, what made sense at the time. So as we're evolving, we'll see what happens. But I there's a lot of ways that we are, you know, giving back in other ways to the diabetes community without being a nonprofit, so

Scott Benner 1:13:31
I'm not judging you. Listen, I would never make this but I it's been before like, you know, you could be a nonprofit. Again, it just seems like a lot of work. It's a lot of board of directors and like, you know, like, yeah, I'm gonna build this podcast up and then let someone else be in charge of it. I was like, a weird world or you live in. I actually know someone who started an amazing diabetes charity 10 years ago, that helped a lot of people. And that person ended up getting ousted from it because the board of directors decided they didn't like his direction. Like, yeah, no, somebody's taking your 18 year old kid and going and it's ours now. No, wait, what? So yeah, I'm not into the all that I don't like. I don't play well with others. I don't like listening to other people. So it's working for you. So I just I would if you put me in a room and you were like, now bill gets to talk. I'd be like, who is Bill? Like I don't like bills? The i don't i don't want his opinion. I don't care about his opinion. Like his opinion. Got him on my board of directors. I'm My opinion is the one that made the thing. Like Like, why would you don't I mean, like, that's just a weird world to be involved in. I don't I don't like the idea of it. So yeah, you get it. That's it. Listen to me. I'm like, I don't like charities. You know what else I don't like big plays. Really, this podcast is just me complaining about things. So I I realize now, I Well, I really appreciate you doing this. I hope everything goes well and that you're not overrun by zombies in Texas. And that especially as you Although Texas zombies will have guns. Yeah. Can you shoot a gun? I cannot. I have not done that yet. You've never done. I haven't worn in Dallas. We're in Dallas yet raised in Dallas city. Yeah. ever held one? I think so. Hey, I haven't even hold one. I don't know why I brought that. I just I assume everyone like in my mind. Texas is just like, everyone has three guns. They're taped to their foreheads. Have you been Austin? No, I almost was there once and then it didn't work out. Yeah. One day. Yeah. I'll tell you what. I will push stop and tell you why it is. I never went there. No one else. Good. Thank you. All right. Sounds good. All right, so everybody else you don't get to know what Rukh Khan is goodbye. A huge thank you to one of today's sponsors. Je Vogue glucagon, find out more about chivo hypo pen at G Vogue glucagon.com forward slash juicebox. you spell that GVOKEGL Uc, ag o n.com. forward slash juicebox. Don't forget to head over to T one d exchange.org. forward slash juicebox. And of course the diabetes pro tip series is that diabetes pro tip calm Juicebox Podcast calm and begins in your podcast player at Episode 210. Check them out.