I've Never Been Hit in the Face with a Shovel
This story takes place a few days after Arden's diagnosis in the summer of 2006...
If you've ever read our diagnosis story you know that Arden was diagnosed during a family vacation, just a few weeks after her second birthday.
With the exception of one day, Arden spent that 'vacation' sick and waiting for us to figure out that she needed medical attention or in the hospital - she was released on a Friday, the day before we were scheduled to make the long drive home.
This was a day full of firsts for us. It was the first time that we gave Arden an injection in a restaurant, first time Kelly hung over the front seat to test a BG, first time I worried about driving with Arden and the first time I cried standing next to my car. It was also the first time I thought my son had cancer (he didn't and doesn't - keep reading).
It was a few hours after we ate at a roadside restaurant, the people at the hospital said we should retest after meals and so I drove as Kelly contorted herself and performed a finger stick from the front seat. The meter revealed that Arden required insulin. Of course we didn't know what the hell we were doing and had packed the insulin in the back of our SUV, I pulled onto the median and got out of the car to retrieve it.
I closed my door and watched Arden in her car seat as the dome light faded to black. Traffic was racing by us with such force and volume that I felt unsafe, this was;t something I would have done prior to diabetes. It was so dark and I couldn't see where I was walking, my eyes began to fill up with tears as I made my way to the rear hatch. A moment later was the first time that I drew a syringe outdoors, or in the dark for that matter. I had to lean over my son Cole to get to Arden's thigh because her door was on the traffic side of my car. I remember that feeling wrong to do.
Life seemed about as unfair as I could imagine as I plunged the needle into Arden...
I rubbed her leg and then turned my attention to Cole as I wondered what all of this must feel like to him. I smiled and put my hand on his face in an attempt to make everything feel okay, that's when I felt the bumps on his neck. I asked him to turn his head and saw that he had large bumps, that to my untrained eye looked like enlarged lymph nodes. The lumps were on both sides and ran down his neck from his ear to his chest. I though in an instant that he had cancer. Keep in mind that I had no reason to think that, it was just what popped into my head, "Lymph nodes > enlarged > cancer > Arden has diabetes > Cole has cancer".
I've never been hit in the face with a shovel but I bet I could describe the sensation with a grand amount of accuracy. The last thing that I felt that night was my hope leave my body. Every sense that I possessed shut off. I couldn't hear, think, smell, I stopped worrying about the traffic whizzing by - I was bereft in every way that we count ourselves as human beings. It's a good thing too because the ride home would have been unbearable if my senses were intact.
The next morning we took Cole to the doctor, he of course did not have cancer and we were told that it isn't uncommon for the lymph system to become enlarged during an infection.
With hindsight I can see that this moment was among the first in a long line of lessons that Arden's diabetes has taught me. Before this moment I thought of myself as someone who didn't panic, I believed myself to be cool under pressure. As it turns out, I had never been under this level of pressure. I know for certain that I wouldn't respond like that today because the person I have become, or perhaps I should say, the person diabetes has forced me to become - doesn't break so easily and doesn't give up so quickly. Diabetes takes far more than it gives but the stuff it gives is valuable - it's one of my goal to pass that message onto Arden and to all of you.
more posts on Arden's Day
Dexcom Share2 begins shipping next week - All the details within!
Dexcom Share2: What is it? How do you get one? When will it ship?
What is it?
The Share2 is a Dexcom G4 Platinum receiver with bluetooth capabilities. You may hear it referred to as the Dexcom Share2, G4 Platinum with Share or Bill (I made that last one up).
With bluetooth built in, the Share2 receiver will be able to send your Dexcom sensor information directly to an iPhone or iPod touch. Why do you care about that? I''ll tell you...
After you install the new Dexcom Share app from the Apple app store onto an iPhone or Touch that will remain with the Dexcom wearer, the information being sent to that device will be magically transported to Dexcom's cloud server where it can be redistributed (if you want) to loved ones, caregivers, parents and if you heard my recent podcast interview with NASCAR driver Ryan Reed... even your pit crew chief - as long as they have an iPhone or touch with the Dexcom Follow app installed.
If you are more of a visual learner... check out this handy diagram I borrowed from Dexcom.com
How do I get it?
If you previously purchased the original Dexcom Share cradle you will be upgraded to the Dexcom Share2 for free.
If you:
- Purchased G4 PLATINUM Receiver after January 1, 2015 — FREE upgrade to Dexcom G4 PLATINUM Receiver with Share
- Purchased G4 PLATINUM Receiver between March 1, 2014 and December 31, 2014 — Eligible to upgrade to Dexcom G4 PLATINUM Receiver with Share for $199
- Purchased G4 PLATINUM Receiver before March 1, 2014 — Insurance or cash pay prices will apply
Upgrade offers are good through April 30, 2015 - Orders can be placed beginning March 2, 2015 at 1-888-738-3646 or on Dexcom.com
When will it ship?
Dexcom is anticipating shipment to begin on March 2, 2015. It's posted on their website so I'd say that's pretty much a certainty even though they use the word 'anticipated' - I'd bet that just CYA. I'd be comfortable betting that it'll ship in three days from today on March 2nd.
Other stuff you may be wondering...
- Dexcom G4 PLATINUM Receiver with Share is approved for both adults and children as young as 2 years old.
- Your supply of sensors and current transmitter work with the Share2.
- If you are currently using the Share cradle, your Share app will need to be upgraded.
- The Follow app remains unchanged.
- Other than previous statements from Dexcom that it is being worked on and expected to be available soon, No word about when Android compatibility with be available.
- The Dexcom cloud service is free.
- Share2 does not need to be plugged into an electrical source, totally portable.
- Previous statements from Dexcom indicate that running the Share and Follow apps won't drain your iPhone/Touch batteries significantly.
- Existing Cradle owners will be contacted by email but must call Dexcom to initiate upgrade process.
- (updated info) No preorders. Ordering begins March 2, 2015
My Interview with Ryan Reed
Fresh from his first NASCAR victory, 21 year old Ryan Reed sits down with me to talk about his type 1 diabetes diagnosis, racing with diabetes and what it feels like to win his first race.
You really do not want to miss a second of my conversation with Ryan. You'll learn everything from how he reacted when a doctor told him that he couldn't drive a race car after his diagnosis, to what 190 M.P.H. feels like - and just how does he keep his blood sugar from crashing in a 150º race car?
Seriously, if you haven't tried my new podcast yet, this is definitely the week to jump in.
One your mark...
Get set...
GO! listen to the podcast
The Art of Dana Lechtenberg
The internet is a magical place for so many reasons, here's one of them...
I listen to a number of podcasts and one day I was drawn to purchase a t-shirt from one of them, a show called FEaB (Four Eyes and a Beard) starring Matt Mira from the Nerdist Podcast and Scott Mosier from Smodcast with director Kevin Smith.
Hold tight this gets interesting quickly.
So I buy this t-shirt and wear it at least once a week because I love the design. Months later on a Friday evening I see a tweet from Scott Mosier congratulating someone named Dana Lechtenberg for winning an award for his art, the accompanying image in the tweet reminds me of stuff I've seen elsewhere online.
I click...
It turns out that Dana's album design has won an American Advertising Award, and with that I fall a little bit further down the digital rabbit hole that is the art of Dana Lechtenberg. It isn't long before I realize that this might be the person who designed my beloved FEaB t-shirt. My interest is thoroughly peaked, and I begin to devour Dana's art on his website.
I soon find that aside from creating art for podcasts like FEab and Nerdist, Dana is an accomplished artist and advertising designer and I just can't get enough of what he does. Before I know it my family is in bed and I'm about to do something a bit crazy.
Somewhere between being enveloped by the warmth of his Fantastic Four piece and my instant love of his use of color, shading and dimension - it hits me why I'm so drawn to Dana's art...
It reminds me of my banner image on Arden's Day...
Arden is good sport about having her picture on the top of a website that a lot of people see but once in a while she makes a request for me to find a new image - seems that she doesn't like that she is so young in the picture. I've been promising her for months that I will find a way to replace the image but have asked her to understand that after eight years, it's become more of a symbol than that of a picture. She understands. If I'm being honest I've been in a small, but constant panic about how to replace the image, stuck between wanting to honor Arden's request and not knowing how to do that.
My love for Arden and desire to fulfill her desire led me to do something that I wouldn't normally do, I wrote to Dana and asked him if he would consider designing new images for Arden's Day and the Juicebox Podcast - here's where the Internet can be magical... he said yes!
Very soon the man behind all of the images that you see here and more that you could see on his website, will be creating original artwork for my type I parenting blog and podcast. I could not be more excited to see what he comes up with! I told Dana that I feel like my image of Arden is what one of his pieces would look like if it came to life. His use of color, warmth, perspective and the feeling of texture that his work evokes - well, I am just beyond grateful for his kindness and simply can not wait to rebrand Arden's Day and Juicebox with his work.
How can it be possible that my blog and podcast will soon be adorned with the art from the same artist who designs for some of the biggest podcasts in the world? Easy answer, sometimes the Internet can be used for good. But I don't need to tell that to a bunch of people who use it in the way that we do. People living with type 1 diabetes know all about supporting strangers in need.
A huge thank you to Dana for his good will, Scott Mosier for his tweet and Kevin Smith for always encouraging folks like me to start a podcast.
The next episode of the Juicebox Podcast goes up tomorrow (Ep4. Texting Diabetes) and then there will be a special episode going up later in the week (instead of the following Tuesday), my interview with Ryan Reed, the 21 year old NASCAR driver with type 1 diabetes who just won the Xfinity race in Daytona. To not miss a minute, go to JuiceboxPodcast.com and subscribe now.
Helping Children with Diabetes Gain Independence
This is the finale of the series. Links to previous posts are below, if you'd like to read it in order.
I was asked recently on my blog if I had any tips for a family that was considering Arden’s school day diabetes management plan. Anything that I hadn’t mentioned – perhaps a tip that would make the transition smoother. I responded in part by saying, “I didn’t know what I was doing when I started either.” I think that’s the most powerful message of support I could offer anyone. None of us know what to expect when we forge our own way with type 1 diabetes. All we have is the knowledge that we’ve been able to accumulate, but I think that’s a lot.
Consider how little you knew on the day that your child was diagnosed and remember how your doctors only began to scratch the surface when they explained diabetes care. Now, you probably have more diabetes knowledge than three doctors combined. I know that I am the foremost expert on my daughter’s physiology. I can, with great accuracy, predict how her body will react to insulin, exercise, stress and all of the factors that we pay attention to. I didn’t learn these things in school or at a doctor’s office, I learned them by experiencing diabetes – and that’s how our kids are going to learn.*
I want to caution you to not get too comfortable and to always keep a watchful eye as our children take over more and more control of their day-to-day diabetes health considerations. Because even though they are some of the most courageous and levelheaded kids a person will ever meet, they are still kids. I think they want and need to know that we are here. “We” doesn’t have to mean just parents. If you end up trying Arden’s plan in school, please remind the teacher that your child’s diabetes independence doesn’t mean that they don’t need an adult to be concerned and watchful at times. My friend’s new book reminded me recently that sometimes the most responsible children tend to get forgotten and that space can lead to apathy for them. Sometimes the trust is easy to take advantage of, especially if the child is experiencing diabetes burnout. It can happen to anyone and it will, so always remember to be a presence during those formable years.
It’s my sincere wish that this series has helped you to feel powerful and more in control. I hope that something I’ve shared has given you a new perspective and made you feel like the idea of anything being possible isn’t just something you read on an Internet meme. I also want to thank you, because I learned something from writing these pieces. I learned that I was getting too complacent and that we should be taking what we’ve learned from the last year of managing Arden’s diabetes from school and make something new happen.
I’m very excited to share that by the time you read this Arden will have gone to a concert with her best friend and her friend’s mother, without me or my wife in attendance. I’m going to take the things that I’ve learned from Arden’s diabetes management at school and use them to let go a little more. I’m going to use them to give Arden more freedom, so that diabetes can be a smaller part of her life. It may take a lot of self-control not to drive up the interstate behind our friend’s car and sit in the parking lot of the stadium, but I’m going to use the same courage I felt in an e-mail one of you sent me recently. If you can read about what I do and find the strength to try… so can I.
Thank you so much for reading!
My best,
Scott
