#1384 Misdiagnosed and Misguided

Heather, 50, was diagnosed with T1D 18 months after an initial T2 diagnosis.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends, welcome back to another episode of The Juicebox Podcast.

Heather is 50 years old. She was diagnosed with type one diabetes after she was misdiagnosed with type two diabetes, that process was painful for her, and we're going to talk about that today. Nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your health care plan. Don't forget, if you use my link drink AG, one.com/juicebox you'll get a free year supply of vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first order. And if you go to cozy earth.com and use the offer code juice box to check out, you're gonna save 40% off of your entire order, and that's in time for the holidays. Get over there. Now, if you are the caregiver of someone with type one diabetes or have type one yourself, please go to T 1d exchange.org/juice, box and complete the survey. This should take you about 10 minutes, and will really help type one diabetes research. You can help right from your house at T 1d exchange.org/juice, box. And while I don't ask often about this, there is a public Facebook page for the Juicebox Podcast. If you go give that a follow, that would be awesome. It would really help the show. There's also a private group, which I talk about a lot, but go find that public page too. The episode you're listening to is sponsored by us, med, us, med.com/juice, box, or call 888-721-1514, you can get your diabetes testing supplies the same way we do from us med. This show is sponsored today by the glucagon that my daughter carries, G VO, hypo, pen. Find out more at gevoke, glucagon com, forward slash juice box.

Heather 1:58
My name is Heather. I was diagnosed with type one a year and a half ago. Obviously, misdiagnosis is type two first. Like everyone else,

Scott Benner 2:07
how long was the misdiagnosis for?

Unknown Speaker 2:09
So again, that's

Scott Benner 2:15
you think. We'll, we'll figure it out as we talk. Go ahead. Yeah.

Speaker 1 2:17
I mean, I'm trying to think back. I got confused with that question of like, from like, the dka ICU visit. It was about a month before I got into an end up, which was quick when I got the correct diagnosis. But I had gestational in 2012 and of course, when I look back now, I'm like, Ooh, I had symptoms from like, 2014

Scott Benner 2:44
Yeah, well, if you have gestational And how old are you right now,

Speaker 1 2:47
I'm 50. Okay, so I was a later mom. I was, I was just at the end of 38 when I had my kids. I have twins. Oh,

Scott Benner 2:56
okay, so you had twins, and you were 38 you had gestational with them. So at 49 when you show up with diabetes, they're just they, they just say, Oh, you have type two correct, because that's the expectation. Okay, are there other autoimmune issues for you or your family? So I

Speaker 1 3:12
have twins, and they're identical, and the one had has vitiligo, and his showed up probably like, maybe when he was two, I started to notice it, and my mother had it as well, so I knew what it was. Yep,

Scott Benner 3:26
your mom has an autoimmune issue. One of your twins does vitiligo correct, okay? And how about thyroid?

Speaker 1 3:34
Nothing that I know of, but I know that's like a tricky one, right? I

Scott Benner 3:39
mean, any super tired people in your family or can't even me, can't digest their food, hair falling out? Okay? Yeah, what? It's just still time. What a type one answer to a question, by the way. Hey, you have any of these problems not yet coming, we'll see. Don't worry, I'm looking for it. Okay, so vitiligo, a little uncommon, but not completely. And you were 38 when you have the kids? Yes, 48 they're 12 now ish, well, they'll be 12 in August. Cool. Happy birthday. Did you get, like, one of each or how'd they come out? No, so identical. But they're identical. I'm sorry, boys, yeah, yep. So in theory, they should be exactly the same, but they have some differences. Have you seen that Tiktok trend now where it's like, about twins and they're not identical, and somebody's like, what a waste of time? No, I haven't gonna get all that trouble to make twins. They're not identical. What leads you to the doctor, did you was, I mean, I assume, if you had gestational maybe you knew what was happening to you.

Speaker 1 4:46
So I actually didn't. I did that whatever test, right? When you drink the whatever is it? You're drinking glucose, whatever. When you're pregnant, whatever they make you

Scott Benner 4:56
do. It's the, yeah, what's it called? The glucose, not a challenge. It's a. Tolerance, glucose tolerance test, yeah,

Speaker 1 5:01
so I passed out taking that. And, um, they were like, Oh, you probably lost the baby. And I was like, what? Like, why would you say that? And if that's a possibility, like, Why did I take this test? Like, that was my first of, like, distrust, or just there, I guess every,

Scott Benner 5:20
every every conversation I have, I'm drawn to be like, where do you live? So I don't move there. Like, that's what

Speaker 1 5:27
I It gets better. And it's, I can tell you generically, it's three different states, so it's not even, like, state specific or city specific, okay, which is kind of sad. But anyway, so I luckily did not lose my baby, but then quickly found out there were two of them, and they wanted me to take I don't even remember what it was. It was a pill, so I'm gonna assume it was Metformin. And I didn't want to take anything while I was pregnant. And they kept pushing it, and at my next appointment, they made me watch a video of someone giving birth to how do I want to phrase it? I wasn't well controlled. So the baby was rather large, and then I was like, Okay, I'll take it like they scared me into it. And I'm like, Okay, wait,

Scott Benner 6:14
they scared you straight with a video of someone giving a vaginal birth to an oversized baby and saying you have to share your gestational diabetes. Yes,

Unknown Speaker 6:22
they were like, this is going to be you. Can I

Scott Benner 6:24
ask a question? Were you considering not listening to them? Like, were they like, this lady's gonna be a problem. We gotta get out the big gloves right

Speaker 1 6:32
now. I mean, I felt bullied. I hate to use that phrase, but I did. I felt like, All right, do I want to keep arguing this? Should I just trust so maybe I shouldn't say bully. But I was like, Maybe I should learn to trust these people. Is maybe more on my thought

Scott Benner 6:48
process at the time, make sure I understand you didn't want to take the glucose tolerance test right away.

Speaker 1 6:53
The tolerance test, I was okay with. I didn't want to take the Metformin.

Scott Benner 6:57
Metformin. Okay? Why? Tell me why. Like, your initial reaction, I

Speaker 1 7:02
just so I've always been more of, like, natural thinking of I have an issue. I can figure it out, whether it be exercising more or drinking more water or something like a medication would be the last resort for me personally. And there's no like judgment, like, who, however people want to live, that's how you want to live, right? But for me, any sort of medication would be my last thought. Okay?

Scott Benner 7:27
I just wanted, like, I have a brother like that, by the way, where he's just like, I'll be all right. And I'm like, Okay. And like, and I get his point. You know what I mean? Again, I get yours too. I just wanted to understand. So, okay, so you weren't there, like, Hey, you're gonna need Metformin. And you were like, Listen, I'll do a jumping jack and drink some more water. And then they were like, look, what'll happen to your vagina if a 20 pound baby comes out of it. Is that about what it went is that about

Speaker 1 7:51
it? Yeah, and just that, you know, the baby would have all these issues. Like, there was a lot of scare tactics that they used. And then I think I did a little research, and this is so long ago, but I don't know if it was, like, a Class C drug, I can't remember, but it wasn't something that you wanted to just take without any thought while you were pregnant. And that was my other, like, hesitation, um, and I'm not saying it's right or wrong. That was just my thoughts at the time, but I ended up taking it. Yeah,

Scott Benner 8:19
I just, I didn't realize that there was, like, like, the driver's ed equivalent of a gestational diabetes video, yeah. And

Speaker 1 8:26
I felt like very set up because it was, I had no idea. And then I went in for my appointment, and they had, like, the video going, I'm like, what is happening? What

Scott Benner 8:33
do you think happened on their side? Do you think, like, this hippie doesn't want to take our medicine? Is that? What do you think? Is that, how you came off to them. Do you believe or do you not know?

Speaker 1 8:42
Probably. I mean, I think, as much as I dislike most physicians, based on my experience, I understand their thought process of, you know, a medication is always, is typically an appropriate path, right? That's their belief system, right? Like I I understand that. I get it. It's not going to be, you know, exercise or eat better, or whatever it's going to be. We have a medication that can help you with that, and that's their belief. And oftentimes that's probably the correct path, but not always right. I see what you're saying

Scott Benner 9:17
like, you feel like establishment wants to go right to medication, and you're worried that they're just making that leap without trying other things. But do you look back now in hindsight and think, thank God I did that? No, no, but it worked out, though, right. The kids came out like an average size and all. So I

Speaker 1 9:36
went into I had them at 28 weeks, so they were both only two pounds.

Scott Benner 9:41
They weren't gonna be oversized, one way or the other. You're like they could have been two and a half pounds. But do you feel like you dodged other issues because of that? Let me do that. You keep talking, and I'm gonna look for something. Okay, okay, go ahead.

Speaker 1 9:56
I don't think I did, because after I had them. Um, it was simply okay. You don't need to take the medication anymore. And, like, good luck with your babies. Like it wasn't. We should test your labs. You should follow up with this doctor, that doctor. It was just like it was over. Stop taking it. Have a nice life. And so I did, and I didn't think anything about it ever again. You know, I had two premature babies that was living my life, working full time. I wasn't like, Oh, I wonder if they should have suggested a follow up, right, which I don't know you would think is standard protocol. Many years later, I'm in the ICU for a week at 90 pounds, diagnosed type two with malnutrition. Well, how tall are you? I'm 555,

Scott Benner 10:42
what did you weigh before the diabetes got you? So

Speaker 1 10:46
my whole life I've been like, around 115 but like, like, lean muscle.

Scott Benner 10:51
Well, 551, 15. To lose 25 pounds is significant. And

Speaker 1 10:56
I looked forward, right? And when i I'm sure all of us do the same thing. We think back on certain circumstances and situations prior to being diagnosed, I probably looked like I was on drugs. Yeah, 100% is probably why I was dismissed so many times when I knew something was wrong.

Scott Benner 11:17
Oh, you went to the doctor and people turned you away at first. Well, towards

Speaker 1 11:21
the end, yes. So, I mean, I random things before then, like, I think most employers, they have, you know, the health fairs. And if you go get your blood work done, you get like, $100 in your HSA. Like I would do that every year, because I wanted the $100 and back to 2014 I was testing high. It was like 121, 25 it wasn't like 600 but it was higher than, higher than it should have been. And it was always the same response of, oh, you're fine, you're thin, you don't have anything to worry about. Like, it was always the same response. And I was like, Cool,

Scott Benner 11:56
great, Heather, listening to the nurse in the cafeteria of the place where she worked.

Speaker 1 11:59
Yeah, and I'm like, Cool. I'm not worried. Thank you. This

Scott Benner 12:03
girl who seems to have been out of college for at least a month says I'm okay, yep, I'm not gonna think about this again, but I will take my honey. Thank you very much. I

Speaker 1 12:14
know it's also disturbing to me now, but at the time,

Scott Benner 12:18
see you were pre, you had pre, some form of pre diabetes, Lada for almost 10 years. Yes, yeah, okay, I would assume so, right. It sounds like, Hey, can I read you a list real quick? Yeah, babies born to mothers with gestational diabetes who have high blood glucose levels during pregnancy. During the pregnancy, of course, you're risking excessive birth weight, pre term birth, respiratory distress syndrome, miscarriage or stillbirth after the birth, hypoglycemia, jaundice, respiratory problems, higher risk of obesity and type two diabetes, long term risks for the babies type two diabetes and metabolic syndrome, increased risk of metabolic syndrome, which includes a cluster of conditions such as high blood pressure, high blood sugar and abnormal cholesterol levels. I guess it's probably hard to like, like, you know, in a world where it's hard to make a human being believe if they smoke a cigarette they might get cancer 50 years from now that, like, I don't know, how do you tell somebody that when they're pregnant? You know what I mean, right? Because your glucose is a little high, it's not a thing. Probably even sounds scary to most people. But anyway, yeah, I think that

Speaker 1 13:21
all sounds terrifying, yeah, but all they used was they're gonna be huge and, yeah, it's not gonna be pleasant. That's

Scott Benner 13:30
all they said. Well, I'm sure that they were somewhere between your little girl, Heather, are you sure? Is that like they probably were, really? Because maybe, Listen, I'm not sticking up for people who are lazy at their job, or ham fisted or whatever. But I wonder how many times you have to go through this rigmarole with people before you're just like, oh, let's just skip to the part where we tell them the baby's gonna come flying out like a truck, right? You know? Like, see if we can't get them to take care of themselves. I don't know. It's a weird thing. I see both sides of it. If you take insulin or so final ureas, you are at risk for your blood sugar going too low. You need a safety net when it matters most, be ready with GE voc hypo pen. My daughter carries GE voc hypo pen everywhere she goes, because it's a ready to use rescue pen for treating very low blood sugar in people with diabetes ages two and above that I trust low blood sugar. Emergencies can happen unexpectedly and they demand quick action. Luckily, jivo kypo pen can be administered in two simple steps, even by yourself in certain situations. Show those around you where you store jivo kypo pen and how to use it. They need to know how to use G vo kypo pen before an emergency situation happens. Learn more about why GEVO kypo Pen is in Arden's diabetes toolkit at gvoke, glucagon.com/juicebox, gvoke shouldn't be used if you have a tumor in the gland on the top of your kidneys called a pheochromocytoma, or if you. Of a tumor in your pancreas called an insulin Oma. Visit, gevoic glucagon.com/risk. For safety information. I have always disliked ordering diabetes supplies. I'm guessing you have as well. It hasn't been a problem for us for the last few years, though, because we began using us Med, you can too us med.com/juice box or call 888-721-1514, to get your free benefits. Check us med has served over 1 million people living with diabetes since 1996 they carry everything you need, from CGM to insulin pumps and diabetes testing supplies and more. I'm talking about all the good ones, all your favorites, libre three, Dexcom, g7 and pumps like Omnipod five, Omnipod dash, tandem, and most recently, the I let pump from beta bionics, the stuff you're looking for, they have it at us. Med, 88887211514, or go to us, med.com/juice box to get started now use my link to support the podcast. That's us, med.com/juice box, or call 888-721-1514,

Unknown Speaker 16:13
and I think about

Speaker 1 16:14
how I would have thought back then, and I don't know even if they did go through the list, to your point, but I would have been like, Oh, this is a really big deal. I still probably would have been of the mindset of whatever I need to do right outside of taking Metformin. I can do that like I definitely had this. I can fix whatever thing that I don't have anymore. So, yeah, I don't know if it would have mattered, to be honest. Now it does. But then I would have been like, Okay, thanks.

Scott Benner 16:40
You grew up in a house where people didn't go to the doctor.

Speaker 1 16:43
So no, my parents, neither of them, were very healthy, like my dad had his first heart attack at 35 and his last one at 62 my mom passed away from DKA in 2019 but she was diagnosed as a type two in her 40s, really, and yes, and I, of course, like, I go over this in my head all the time now, which we'll never know, but I'm like, Was she a type two? Because she was on insulin, so she was on Metformin, plus a short and a long, and it was always a mess, and it was always blamed on her diet. And I think I supported ignorantly that thought process, because at the time, I ignorantly thought type two was all diet related as well.

Scott Benner 17:35
You were just like, Mom, you're just eating wrong. This is yes, yeah, you have guilt about that.

Speaker 1 17:41
I do, especially now that I'm in that situation, it's a very lonely and isolating feeling. So I don't think me badgering her about like eating a Hershey kiss in the past was relevant, right?

Scott Benner 17:56
Do you think now, like, oh my god, if somebody would talk to me like that, I'd be mortified, probably,

Speaker 1 18:02
yeah, like, really, I think I was more of like, a, I don't want to say a tough love, because she was my mom, but I was just like, Mom, we can fix this. Like, start implementing exercise, start eliminating this and that and that. Like it was always you can do X, Y, Z, and I think she did do some of them. Obviously, it didn't matter

Scott Benner 18:22
how long did she How long did she live with it?

Speaker 1 18:25
Um, so she passed away when she was 73 and so she was in her 40s when she was diagnosed type two, okay, I just remember it was always, I would always see her shaky. She was definitely always very moody that would come out of nowhere, just lots of behaviors that, now that you know I know more about everything, I'm like, oh, that's what this all was. And she just needed, like, help and guidance and someone to actually care for her appropriately on the medical side. And I don't think she received that, because even when she went into DKA, she lived alone and I lived, like, two hours away. I was with her over the weekend, and we would text a lot, so like that, Monday, I texted her, she said she wasn't feeling good. Tuesday, I checked in, I didn't hear anything from her, which wasn't uncommon. But then Wednesday, when I didn't hear from her, I felt uncomfortable, and I'm like, something wrong? So I called her neighbor. I'm like, Hey, can you run over? And that's when they found her, and even when they took her to the emergency room, and she had been there plenty of times before, and so they knew she had type two or type one, whatever, they initially sent her for X ray, she wasn't conscious, by the way. They sent her for X rays, because when they found her. She was on the floor. So it's like, I don't understand, I don't understand the protocol of you have an unconscious diabetic person, and our first concern is, did she break a bone?

Scott Benner 19:53
There's this episode I have with a an emergency room. Nurse. It's a it's a cold wind. So she's anonymous. She's an emergency room nurse with type one diabetes who was witnessing another hospital employee a medical issue. They were having a seizure from their type one diabetes, and they kept trying to send him out for a head CT, and she's like, his blood sugar is low, and like she had to stand there and have an argument that she almost lost, like they almost just pushed the guy out the door to another place. I'm taken back to that conversation all the time, because I remember her saying, I'd be safe for having a seizure at your house, Scott, than in the hospital

Speaker 1 20:31
I work in. That's so scary, and that's something I'm terrified of as well. I think everybody is. But anyway, so they, you know, did their X rays, and just fine, but then she passed away, like a day later, and I think they said from, like, sepsis. But it was, it was, you know, your parents

Scott Benner 20:48
were both reasonably unwell through their life, like your dad had a heart attack when he was 35 Yeah.

Speaker 1 20:53
And, like, yeah. So I think that was always my main motivation for always trying to be healthy like I did not. So I'm saying this respectfully, yeah, because it sounds disrespectful, but I didn't want to end up like them. You know, I'm was always into different sports. I enjoyed healthy eating, so it wasn't like I had to train myself to get there. That was just additional motivation of this isn't going to be me, because I got all the bases covered. I'm interested, I'm knowledgeable. Like, I don't need health care. I don't need anything because I got it. And so here we are,

Scott Benner 21:33
well, here we are, like, I got it. Don't worry, I'll just get my diabetes later. Yes. So okay, so you're diagnosed type two initially, but about a month later, what happens to get through the end, oh, and they're like, you don't have type two diabetes, is that

Speaker 1 21:47
well, so I got to tell the hospital story, because it's Oh please, at least disturbing to me. The morning of I remember waking up and I threw up, and then I remember nothing from that point on, until, like, I have little pieces, but mostly not until a few days later. But so I guess, after I threw up, I texted my friend, and I just said, I need help. And so she came over, because she's like, What's wrong with her? And so she took me to the hospital, but she said I was walking around getting my kids ready for school, and that we dropped my kids off at school first, which have no recollection of any of it. But anyway, so we get to the hospital, she texts me in which I don't remember anything. I remember only twice that I had to go into the bathroom there to throw up, and it was like a public bathroom, so it was just like, it was gross, it was dirty. But we were there for six hours, so initially they took blood work when we got in there, and I was, I don't remember that either. She said I was unconscious. Like, the whole time we were there for six hours, she kept going up and saying to the staff, she's like, my friend is dying. Like, can someone please see her? And they were just like, she'll be seen soon. It was just like, that same old whatever. Yeah. So at one point she tries to get me out, and she had just had surgery on her knee, so it was like she was struggling with trying to get unconscious me out the door, when she was like, kind of wobbling. And the the gentleman that had taken my blood saw her taking me out, and he ran up to her and said, you can't take her home. She's dying. And she's like, No kidding. Are you going to see her? And he's like, I can't do anything about who gets seen. And so then she's like, well, then we're out of here. And so we went to a hospital, which literally was like three minutes away, thank God. And she said I was in, I was being taken up to an ICU, ICU room within 15 minutes. So like, Thank God she took me when she did. I just remember, because I lost all this weight, okay? And for like, months prior, I couldn't sleep because, like, my tailbone was sticking out. So I couldn't lay on my back. I couldn't lay on my side because, like, my hip bones were sticking out. I couldn't lay on my stomach because my pelvic bones, like, I was so uncomfortable for months, so they put this pad on my tailbone and, like, that's the last thing I remember. I was like, oh my god, I have some like, comfort. It was the greatest feeling ever. I'm like, I can lay down without pain. I was there for several days, I think six in the ICU, and I just remember them on, like, the maybe the day before I left, saying that it was type two. I was so sick. Like, I can't even describe, like, how sick I was, like, I was just non functional. It took me, like, almost two months before I could even physically lift my purse without, like, strain. Like, that's how weak and just I was nuts.

Scott Benner 24:31
Yeah, who was taking care of your kids during that time after I got home? Well, no, like, while your health is degrading, like, Do you even remember those times. So this is the, probably

Speaker 1 24:43
one of the scarier parts that I look back on. I feel like the first thing that went at least for me, was my brain, like just the thought process, the thought functions, because there's so much I don't remember and then so this will happen. I was finally diagnosed in March, right? That whole hospital episode, but in December, I started randomly falling asleep, but not realizing I had fallen asleep in the afternoons, and I would wake up to my kids saying, Mom, where are you? Because school was out and I picked them up, and that's what would wake me up, but I would have no recollection of any of that happening, and I remember not being able to, you know, when you get out of the shower and you put the towel on your head to dried off a little bit, I remember not being able to do that because my head hurt so much from that slight like touching pressure. Yeah,

Scott Benner 25:39
when my just my iron was very low. I couldn't lift my hands up to dry my hair. Like me, yeah, when my iron got really low,

Speaker 1 25:49
yeah? I mean, it's crazy, yeah, but so it does scare me that, like there's so many things I don't remember. But when I was in the hospital, the friend that took me to the hospital took my kids. My kids are friends with her son, so like, for them, they were super excited. And I just left it at that place, right? Yeah. Like, just be excited. It's

Scott Benner 26:09
cool, going to camp. Mommy's gonna go die goodbye. But

Speaker 1 26:13
so it was like, you know, type two. Even at that point, I just felt disappointment. I was thinking to myself, I don't have type two. These people are nuts. I'm so sick and I can't believe I'm now gonna go home and I'm back to square one of I have no idea what's wrong with me. Like I not one spot type two.

Scott Benner 26:32
So you thought there was something significantly wrong with you, and they were telling you something that it

Speaker 1 26:38
wasn't correct. Okay, I didn't believe them for one second based on how you felt. Yes, okay. And I literally, and I'll, like, never use this phrase outside of this again. Like I literally felt like I was dying for months, like every part of my body and my brain was saying you were dying. And I remember my dog like, just constantly pawing at me to the point that I was like, What is wrong with our dog? It's like, he knew,

Scott Benner 27:05
yeah. He's like, I'm gonna eat this lady when she dies. I know. My God, isn't that something your dog's trying to help you? Yes? Yeah, you're so sick that a dog is like, something's wrong with this one. And yeah, and doctors don't know,

Speaker 1 27:20
it literally was like, constant, because you're

Scott Benner 27:24
skinny, by the way, because you're a thin person. Do you think that's the whole reason they're like, it's like, why would they not? Do you know what I mean? Like, why does the bullshit of, oh, you're thin, it's okay not make somebody go. I mean, if that's their mindset, then why don't they go, Oh, you're thin. This isn't type two. Like, you know what I mean? Like, if they're willing to make, like, a bullshit leap because of the size of your body for one reason, but not for the other, I

Speaker 1 27:47
agree. I think it's all laziness. I think it's complacent this, I really, and that's been my experience. It's just it's lazy. And I like when people are like, Oh, they're so busy. Well, what are they busy doing, because it's not patient care. They're generating income. They're busy generating income, but it's not patient care, because my story is far from unique. Yeah, you know, I've listened to tons of very similar stories on the podcast. It's just, it's lazy, and it's, I don't know why we all accept it, and I think it's we accept it, because what the heck else are we supposed to do? Well, yeah, like, what are we gonna do? Right?

Scott Benner 28:24
Because the other side of it is they're they're also just people. And you know what? I mean, like, they're in an imperfect system, and they're not perfect people, and everything else that goes along with being human is involved. But you would think that in a world that's so I mean, listen, look at what our I hate to talk like this, but like, look what our computers can accomplish, right? Like, we're shooting, I don't know, rockets to space stations and bringing them back again, and cars are driving themselves. And, you know, an algorithm can pretty much do anything it can. Can control your blood sugar through a thing that a guy in Russia made in an app. And I, you know, don't know the first thing about gestational diabetes, but by typing the sentence, what happens to a baby of a gestational mother if the mother has high blood glucose, I got the complete and utter breakdown of what happens in literally, a split second. You'd think we'd be able to figure out how to triage people more accurately, I

Speaker 1 29:22
know that's all I'm saying, but it gets better with that hospital, even though I appreciate that they did save my life because they did, right, of course, yeah, and I think we all go back and forth like ers are meant to keep you from dying, right? They're not technically meant to diagnose, right? It's just to stabilize you. So I do appreciate that they saved my life, however. So the day I was leaving is when I assume it was a diabetes educator came in, but I'm not really sure. And she gave me, you know, the pamphlets of, like, you know, a quarter of a bagels, 15 carbs, blah, blah, blah, like, things I was just like, this lady talking about, and why? Yeah. And then she whispered to me and said, You're not type two. You have type one. You need to see an endo. And she handed me a piece of paper where she wrote down like, five different endos and said I ranked them from who I recommend best to least good luck. And it was just kind of like, you know, be quiet. And I was again, I was still, like, this lady's nuts. Like, not type two, but I'm definitely not type one. And you also, you don't

Scott Benner 30:26
know the world that she understands. She's like, Listen, you were just misdiagnosed. I'm trying to save your life. Take this paper. And you're like, Okay, crazy person. Hey, yeah, I hear you. Yeah,

Speaker 1 30:38
yep. Thank God for her, right? But so, you know, all they make you do as an adult is, you know, stick the needle on your stomach. And as long as you can do that, then you're good to go. And, like, that's literally it. So there's no directions, advice, nothing right, which is, just as long as you can poke your stomach with the needle, you can leave now. And I remember specifically asking about like, because they told me I would have prescriptions for two insulins on how I was supposed to do that. And they were like, instructions will be with the prescription. So I'm like, Okay, so my friend takes me to pick them up. The long acting makes sense, 20 units once a day. But then for the short acting, it says take one unit as needed.

Speaker 2 31:25
Like, that's literally what it said. So it's like, it's so disturbing

Scott Benner 31:30
to me, when you look back at it, you're like, what does that mean? Because there's

Speaker 1 31:34
no scenario where that's an appropriately written prescription, right? Do you agree? I'm just like, yeah,

Scott Benner 31:41
no. I mean, the person were to say to you, look, we put a generic placeholder in the script because we don't know what to say yet, because we don't have your insulin to carb ratio. We're not sure if you're honeymooning. We don't know any of that stuff like, and these are things you're not gonna understand yet, but that's why you're gonna go right to an endocrinologist and get it all worked out. Like, you know, but no, as needed. So that's then up to you to go, Okay, well, here's a unit. Is that what's been is

Speaker 1 32:04
I called the hospital when I got home, because I'm like, I don't know what this means. Like, when would I know when I need it? And of course, they're like, Well, you're not a patient here anymore. You need to talk to your PCP. And I think this was like a Friday afternoon, of course. So then I don't even think I called them until Monday. And then, of course, they were like, well, we didn't prescribe you that. We can't tell you how you should take

Scott Benner 32:27
it. Just passing the buck everywhere, right? It

Speaker 1 32:30
was, yeah, and I'm still so sick at this point, and I'm just like, all right, I don't even believe these people anyway, I'll just take this one unit when I eat. This is so funny when I think back on some of this now, because, like, when I got home, like our neighborhood did, like a meal train, just to help so I didn't have to cook dinner for the kids. It was either the first or second day I was home, someone had just ordered pizza for the for us, and so I was still very much starving, right? Like I could eat all day long, every day, like 5000 calories. I still need more food. And I remember eating like six pieces of pizza, and I took one unit of insulin for it. That's about right

Scott Benner 33:12
as needed. Are you wearing a CGM? No, right?

Speaker 1 33:17
No, they didn't send me home with that. I there was a, oh, this is funny too. So it was, you know, with the glucometer, they didn't see anything. Like, I have to preface by saying, like, they provided no information and I was sick. I would keep saying I was really, really sick, yeah. So I would check, like, I think it said check four times a day. I don't remember exactly what it said of how many times to check, but I would check and it would just say, hi, and I remember calling the pharmacy and saying, My glucometer is wrong because it's not reading numbers, it's just reading words and and they literally just said, bring it back. We'll replace it. And I'm like, Okay, thank you. So my friend goes and picks up a new one, brings back the next one. Next one. The next time I check it, it's the same thing. I'm like, can't believe this one's broken too. Like it's not reading a number, and literally, I replaced three until I finally, like, looked at, like the directions, or Googled. I don't remember what I did, because my brain wasn't thinking, Heather,

Scott Benner 34:15
I hope this makes you feel better that the the in the middle of the night, the night we realized we thought Arden had diabetes, and I went out to I went down to a 24 hour pharmacy, and I got a glucose meter. We brought it back, and didn't really know how to do it, and we opened it up, put it together, and checked Arden's blood sugar, and when it said hi, I said out loud, oh, it's so nice. It says hello to you before it gives you the number. My wife's like, hold on, dummy, when you see that. So she she looks in the book, she goes, I think that means her blood sugar is over 500 and I was like, Oh, okay. And then we just packed up and we went to the hospital, like in the middle of the night. But I literally said those words, so I don't want you to feel bad because I wasn't sick. So. I was just dumb. Didn't notice,

Speaker 1 35:02
you don't know, right? Yeah?

Scott Benner 35:05
But I thought like, Well, what a lovely medical device. It's like, Hello. How are you? I'm gonna give your number in a second. Hold on. They don't do that. I love that. You return. How many? Three of them?

Speaker 1 35:15
Yeah. Nobody questioned me. And I literally kept saying, it's just saying words. Nobody was like, Well, what word is it saying? Like, no, yeah. It's like, Here you go. Your

Scott Benner 35:26
story just outlines all the gaps in how things are set up. Like, how many different times and how many different ways somebody can be dropped? And then, I mean, I love that. You call back the hospital and you're like, hey, I have a question. Like, you're not a patient here anymore, but you're like, you told me this, and it's like, that part's over. Now go talk to somebody else. Well, who, you know what I mean, like, and what is as needed. And you know, like, insulin, by the way, is really dangerous. So like, what if you decided one unit as needed meant every 15 minutes, right? Like, you don't, you wouldn't have known, although, in the case of six slices of pizza, that might have been appropriate, but, but Jesus. Yeah, not crazy. It's just crazy. How does it get to the point where you are now, like, what ends up happening that you figure things out?

Speaker 1 36:14
I mean, definitely the podcast, like, how do you find that? So I can't remember. I remember googling because, again, I wasn't feeling physically any better because I was taking one unit as needed, right? Like, wait a minute, how

Scott Benner 36:30
long did you do that? For? Like, a month, by the way, this is not funny, but it is kind of hilarious. So and you have, you have the right attitude to talk about it this way. So for a month, you're just like, how about now unit?

Speaker 1 36:42
I mean, I would eat, and I was still eating, like, and I know everybody manages differently, but I was still eating all day long, like I was starving still, because I was still, wasn't doing anything to feel better, because I didn't know what to do. But yeah, it was like a month, and I just I felt terrible, and I think I started Googling, just for, like, diabetes type one groups on Facebook in my area that I lived. And then I think that one came up on a thread of another group, the Juicebox one. So I'm like, Oh, I'll check that out. The

Scott Benner 37:16
randomness it takes. It was very random, yeah, to help yourself, is, is? I find that very frustrating. But then

Speaker 1 37:22
I didn't start listening to the podcast right away. I started just reading posts, and I'm like, oh, like, Pre Bolus and, like correction factors, and, you know, I'm like, What is all of this? And of course, I was terrified, and I actually still am. I'm, like, a very insecure type one still?

Scott Benner 37:40
Well, you're very new. I mean, I don't see a reason why you should feel completely confident. Like it's a year and a half that makes me feel better. Yeah, no, hell, I would. I was still crying in two years. Don't you worry. I didn't even have diabetes. This is my kid. I also didn't have a podcast to listen to, but that's neither here nor there. I was like, literally still crying in the shower two years into it, yeah. So

Speaker 1 38:04
the end of that, I see i i have a lot of negative things to say about them, but when I did get in there, at least I got a CGM, and they gave me the generic, you know, correction factor 50 and carb ratio of 15. So that at least gave me a starting point which I didn't have, right? Okay, so I'm grateful for that. I do know, at my six month appointment, after listening to a lot of episodes, I asked if they would help me, you know, down my ratios. And they had told me that at that point, this was my six month appointment, that I had been diabetic long enough and then I could just figure it out.

Scott Benner 38:42
Ah, you can make those adjustments. Heather, as needed. It drives

Speaker 1 38:47
me nuts because, like, I have a high deductible, and the visits are like, 350 holy crime. And then they charge, they have an extra charge for downloading my data

Scott Benner 38:58
of $50 I love that,

Unknown Speaker 39:02
which they've only ever gone over with me once

Scott Benner 39:04
we're gonna change your tires. Do you want these lug nuts back on? Because that's gonna be an extra charge, right? How could you charge someone to download their data? It's $50 I want just real quickly. Heather, this just isn't for you. Obviously. This is for other people listening. You're all scumbags. I just want to say, I mean, like anyone who's doing that, like, just be fcking ashamed to yourselves, like you're taking $350 off this lady to tell her, Hey, you could do it yourself. And, by the way, give me 50 more dollars to download your meter. Like, yep, and then not to help you with it. Correct pieces, 100% accurate, absolute pieces of anybody who would do that to

Speaker 1 39:41
you, I know, but like, that's where you get trapped, right? Because we need them for refills. So they provide me no service. They don't, yeah, other than they give me a prescription that they are so conservative with, too that I always have to ask. I remember, like, I'm on a pump now, but when I was still MDI, they didn't even write. It enough that I could prime my pen as many times as I used it a day. And I remember asking them to increase it, and they gave me a really hard time about it, making me almost feel like, like I'm a junkie or something like, like, what else would I be doing with the insulin? Like, I don't understand, like I was

Scott Benner 40:14
squirting it around the room, like fireworks. Like, you know, it's funny. You said junkie because I thought this like an 80s drug movie where the drug dealer makes fun of the guy buying the drugs, like, you, mean, I got to stand here and take this clowning on me before I can get my heroin, like, like, and they're like, Here, give us $50 Thank you. All right, here's your insulin. Yeah, I listen. I don't know, man. Like, the whole world's upside down. Like see I every time I have these conversations, I'm I'm inclined to say I see both sides. But then at some point, I think, no, I don't see their side as much. I know it's just people, and that a person who becomes a nurse is no different or better than a person who becomes a school teacher or the guy that comes and gets your, I don't know, does your does your dry cleaning like, you know, like everyone's people. You'll get good ones, and you'll get bad ones. And you'll get people who are very inclined to help people and to do a great job no matter what. And then you'll get people who are just like, I got this job. I wonder how long I cannot do it before someone fires me. Like those. Those people exist too, you know, in every walk of life, just like they don't care, they're not really trying to add to the greater good of anything. And those people are sometimes doctors too. I, you know, and then you get enough people together, and it gets into a system, it's like, hey, it turns out I can, you know, I don't have to work that hard, and I make a good living. And, you know, Heather's alive, she figured it out, you know? So we all win. We do. I have Porsche and Heather's alive, right? Jesus Christ, I don't know. I just think, like, I mean, there's a minimum, just do your job, right? Like, like, I don't

Speaker 1 41:59
expect them to care about me like, I don't. I think that's romanticizing a business. Yeah, of course, I expect them to do their job. That's it. You don't have to like me. You don't have to look me in the eye, which they usually don't. They don't even usually look at me. They just update things on their laptop, and then, like, that's it. And then I'll go into that my chart, and I'll read, you know, just like, five pages of notes of like, they checked my feet, and they did this, and they did that, which none of that even happened. And I'm

Scott Benner 42:27
like, What is this? No one looked at your feet, but they wrote it down. It's written

Speaker 1 42:31
on every one of my visit notes. They've never once looked at my feet, never once,

Scott Benner 42:37
I swear, I don't have anything bad to say about the Children's Hospital that Arden went to, I really don't the visits where we'd go in there, where they'd, like, let me check your sites, and they would just kind of palpate a little bit to see if there was, like, you know, you know, any spaces maybe, like, Oh, don't, don't inject here anymore. Don't put your pump here or something like that. They just pump it. Push on her belly. But how's your belly feel? Does that hurt? No. Okay, well, then there we go. And like, you know, like, so you pushed on her belly and you touched where her You said, Oh, you're doing a good job rotating. That's good. You're doing great. Everything's great. How are you? How are you? And Orton's like, I mean, I'm like, I'm eight, you know what? I mean, like, I play softball and I go to school and, I mean, I'm not dead, so I guess I'm good, you know, like, like, this is it, huh? This is the visit. I had to fight with them to give her thyroid medication. We don't medicate that number. I said, Well, you do with my kid, like, but I had to do that, you know, I got him up to, like, I don't think this is enough. You need to, like, look at t3 for her. Maybe Fight, fight. You know, they didn't. She grows the thyroid medications, not enough now, Arden starts having like issues where they're like, looking at her heart. This goes back a number of years. Not one person ever said, hey, you know, we put her, she had these thyroid symptoms. We put her on this thyroid medication. She gained 30 pounds, and we never moved up her dose. But these could be thyroid symptoms. Instead, they've got us scared out of our minds. You know, seeing a cardiologist, it took my wife and I to go. Do you think it's possible just just needs some more Synthroid because she gained weight, and then we couldn't get them to agree to that. So by the way, Heather, not for nothing. I started like knocking pills into little pieces and giving her extra I made her symptoms go away. And then I went back to the doctor and I said, Well, here's the thing I did, and now you helped me figure out how we should actually be doing it. Because I gave her extra, this Synthroid, and all this went away. There's no moment where they go, Hey, I'm really sorry for making you drive across the state to see a cardiologist and scare the daddy that your kid had a heart issue, and I didn't listen to you when you mentioned the thing about this Synthroid, but now that you figured out that it works, I'd be happy to adjust the dose and pretend like none of this ever happened, right?

Speaker 1 44:51
Yeah, okay, yeah. I mean, it's just, it's so much pressure because none of us are physicians, right? Like, and you. I personally don't have the capacity to figure out a lot of this, but we're all kind of forced to,

Scott Benner 45:05
oh, to the point where I don't want to say where I was, because I kind of give something away for another person, and which I don't think is right. I was with a healthcare professional for something recently. It was more personal, and they have no idea what I do for a living, which is to say they don't know I make a podcast, and they don't know anything about me. And we were talking and like I was a meal thing and going on and on little bit, there's a number of people there. And eventually this doctor turns to me and he goes, Hey, I'm so sorry. I don't know what you do. You're a doctor, right? And I was like, No. And he goes, you're not in the medical field. You're a nurse. You're and I'm like, and he's just like, looking at me like, blank. And I was like, I make a podcast. And he starts laughing. He goes, I thought you were a doctor. And I'm like, I'm passing as a doctor in this conversation. Be very clear. Heather, that says nothing good about me. That says something very scary about doc, almost didn't graduate from high school. Heather, I want to be very, very, very clear. There was like two months at the end where I was like, oh my god, I'm not going to graduate that I did not go to college. And I'm sitting with a group of professionals. One of them is a is a learned physician who thinks I'm a doctor, there's your problem. Yeah? Fix that.

Speaker 1 46:32
I know. Yeah, Jesus. But I mean, I think we'd all take advice from the podcast members right before, at least I would I have I'm better because of that community. It's listening to the different episodes, it's looking at different posts, and a lot of them are geared towards kids, but I still read them, and I'm like, Oh, should I try that? Oh, I'm gonna do this. And, like, sometimes it works out. Sometimes it doesn't, yeah, but everything came from there. The only thing I got from the medical community was 15 and 50, right? Eat 45 carbs. Oh, 1515,

Scott Benner 47:09
eat 15 carbs. Wait 15 minutes if you're low. Oh, I got that too. Yeah. Oh, no. What? What are you saying?

Speaker 1 47:16
So, like, they just, it was the generic, like, My correction factor was 50 and my carb ratio was 15, and then from there it was, just figure it out from yourself. It's like 32 and seven. You know what's

Scott Benner 47:31
interesting, Jenny and I did these three episodes called the math behind where we had these like conversations about, you know about, like, what the starting math is to figure out somebody's carb ratio, for example. And it's this very basic thing that you know, doctors and practitioners do behind your back in the office, where they're, like, you look over and you think they're they're wizards, and then they come back and they say, let's start with one unit for this. It's like, it's this simple, like, it's just this simple mathematical formula. How much do you weigh?

Unknown Speaker 48:05
Right now, I weigh 124

Scott Benner 48:07
okay, what should the hourly basal rate be for 124 pound female with type one diabetes.

Speaker 1 48:20
I like that you went there because I have a little story with that. Okay,

Scott Benner 48:24
I don't know what I'm doing. It's all just off the top. Let's see, this is just chat GPT. It's not connected to anything. Let's see what it figures out. Highly individualized, even it's covering its ass. Oh, so here it is, total a common starting point is the estimate the total daily insulin requirements for adults. A rough estimate is point five to point seven units per kilogram of body weight per day. Typical basal insulin accounts for about 40 to 50% blah, blah. So this thing's gonna if you asked this thing enough questions and then filled in, like, oh, well, this is, you know, my total daily insulin and went on one, it would give you the answer that you needed. Like, it would divide the daily it's walking me through right now, how to figure this out. And so there are people running around all over the world whose settings are way off, and then they go to a doctor and say, like, how do I adjust this? And doctors like, I don't know. You've had diabetes for six months now, you figure it out. Like, I can ask the magic box, and it comes it explains the whole thing. Like my endo can't do it, I know. Just tell me, you want to get back to tick tock. Seriously. Just have the nerve to say to me, listen, that sounds like a lot of work, and it's almost lunchtime, so why don't you go figure it out? It just, I don't know. All right, what's your story? What did that just make you think? Not really

Speaker 1 49:41
a story, but my endo was always very focused on how much I weighed in the beginning. Because when I would ask to change this prescription, because I would run out, or be close to running out, you're taking too much insulin for your body. It was always because of your body weight. So there must be some sort of calculation somewhere that. Equates, right? That has some generic setting to how much you weigh. Yeah, for months that was that, no, you don't weigh enough to take that much insulin.

Scott Benner 50:10
Well, is it possible I have insulin resistance? Is it possible that I have PCOS? Is it possible that I'm eating, like, really poorly? Like, do you want to ask more questions or just say that and then pass me out of here again, nobody it's the rest of this. Heather, I used to say this more than I say it now it's what we don't say that's important. You know, mean, like, there's more. Like, you just said something great, what's the rest of it? Right? Like, that's where the answer is. Like, what's the rest of it? And no one knows. I don't want to, like, listen, there are people who know. I'm not going to say there aren't people who know. But like, for the most part, really think about this. How many people do you really trust? Oh, I know. How many people in the course of your life do you meet and go there's a person ride or die? End of the World, I'm going with that one. You don't meet that many people like that. So, so I've built these calculators that I have not had the nerve to put out into the public yet, and I don't know if I'm going to, but like, for example, it'll help you with your insulin sensitive figure out your insulin sensitivity. It can help you. It explains the whole thing to you. What's your total daily dose? Do you know what? How much insulin you use a day,

Speaker 1 51:21
yeah, it's like, it's roughly like 32 units. Like 32

Scott Benner 51:24
units. So is your in Do you know what your insulin sensitivity is set at? I have it at seven. You think one unit moves you 7.0 I'm sorry for, like, the correction factor, 32 sorry. So this thing thinks it's like 56 based on your total daily insulin. But I don't know if that's right or not, and that's why I'm not, like, moving these out into the world yet well,

Speaker 1 51:50
and I don't eat a lot, so I think that, oh, like my car, 5050,

Scott Benner 51:55
yeah. Okay, so then there's an example where it just wouldn't work for you, and that's why I don't think it's okay to put these out there. But like, people could tell me your total daily again, was it 32 Yeah, it's roughly 32 and your one unit moves you how much for insulin to carb ratio. My car ratio is seven, seven. And you find these numbers to be very accurate for you. I do

Speaker 1 52:18
good. I actually think the correction factor could be a little lower, to be honest,

Scott Benner 52:24
lower, like, one covers nine, or one covers five,

Speaker 1 52:30
more aggressive, yeah, but yeah, more aggressive. I think there's no reason to feel this way, but I think a lot of people do, like, if I would go lower, it's like some mental thing. Like, I have the reason I don't eat a lot is because I have this mental thing in my head about, like, I never want to take more than five units at a time. Like, if I take more than five units, it's catastrophic. Like, it's

Scott Benner 52:52
why? Why do you feel that way?

Speaker 1 52:54
I think, like a lot of people, but they handle it better. Like, I'm scared of, like, something wacky happening, right? Which I realized, like, if going low, and I realized, if I'm going low, I have the tools and the knowledge to keep myself safe, and everything will be fine. But then you'll read those posts of like, there was no reason I dropped a 32 out of nowhere, and I'm like, Oh my God. Like I have to prepare. And in my head, it's all make believe, like none of this is based on reality at all. In my head, I can manage something going wacky if it's only like five units or four units, but if we go beyond that, then it would just be completely unmanageable. Okay?

Scott Benner 53:35
I mean, I don't, I don't, not understand your fear. That's you know. So what do you do? Eat lower carb for that reason?

Speaker 1 53:42
I do. Yeah, yeah. I could go a lot of places with food.

Scott Benner 53:47
Like, were you lower carb prior to diabetes? No, no, yeah. So you have, you have a fear of getting low, and so you're trying to work with, like, I'll use less insulin, that'll give me less chance of getting low. That's part of

Speaker 1 54:01
it. That's a big part of it. What's the rest of it? I mean, the other part of it is I, like, I hate food now, like, if I could never eat again, I would happily not do so

Scott Benner 54:11
tell me more about that. Tell me more about that,

Speaker 1 54:15
because it's requiring me right? Even if my settings are completely correct, it's still requiring me to do something right that hopefully I get it right, but if I don't, then I'm gonna have to eat a stupid gummy or I'm gonna have to like you. It requires management, right? You feel

Scott Benner 54:33
judged by the outcome. Are you insulted that you need to do it?

Speaker 1 54:38
I feel annoyed by it. I feel overwhelmed by it is probably a better word. Like, I would just like to eat lunch and just eat lunch. Like, I'm just gonna eat whatever it is. I'm gonna go on about my day instead of, oh, did I get this wrong? Oh, I must have been stressed out right before I ate, because now it's going up and like, how long should I. Eight before I do like all of that. I don't want to think about that, no, and I obsess about it all day long,

Scott Benner 55:06
or just think about it, yeah, so

Speaker 1 55:09
it's like, I'm anxious about lows, but I'm also anxious about, you know, I want to be no higher than 120 ever, like, I want to just kind of be in the 80 to 100 all the time, because I feel like there's been, and I don't know any of this, this is all fabricated in my head, but I feel like there's no way I don't have an incredible amount of damage to my body from, like, 10 plus years of being undiagnosed, like, possible, I bet. Yeah, well,

Scott Benner 55:39
I mean, listen, if you're if your blood sugars are 114 for 10 years, it's not optimal. But I don't think you're in trouble.

Unknown Speaker 55:47
No. But who knows what it

Scott Benner 55:48
was, right? Yeah, well, yeah.

Speaker 1 55:51
And I know I have to, like, let it go. And I do believe, like, your body wants to heal.

Scott Benner 55:56
Yeah, it was like, I was gonna say, Where's your hippie stuff? Where'd that guy? It's

Unknown Speaker 56:00
there, it's still there.

Unknown Speaker 56:03
But I do believe that, like, our bodies want to be well,

Scott Benner 56:06
I know what you're saying, but saying it that way is, like, hilarious, is it? Yeah, I don't know. It just sounds like, it sounds like we've been smoking weed all afternoon, and we're talking about, and we're talking about Berberine,

Speaker 1 56:18
this is what I should do, and then maybe I could relax, oh, like,

Scott Benner 56:24
feels like we're in Colorado or on a campfire, and you're like, Yo man, just take more vitamin B. You know about methylation, like, but I totally understand what you mean. Like, I mean, and your body does try to heal itself, like, right? It is trying to, you know, you remake cells, and things can get better. Of course, you know, sometimes those duplicate incorrectly, but you know, for the most part, you know, we get cut, we heal, etc. Listen, it's important to note that I don't know what I'm talking about, but I'd be surprised if you had long term problems from that first couple of years of that, that slow onset, like, I mean, I'd bet, I'd bet for you being okay, if I had to bet some money, that could also be completely wrong, but you should just take some bourbon and see what that does. Or have you tried milk thistle? I'm just kidding. You probably shouldn't. But no, listen, not that there's not some great stuff going on, like with supplements, and there's some I take, some supplements that I'm sure people would laugh at me for. I it's not, it's certainly not a thing I would worry about. Yeah.

Speaker 1 57:33
I mean, I got a lot I got to stop worrying about because I know it's not helpful. Do

Scott Benner 57:37
you hard? Do you want a slice of pizza? Or are you happy eating the way you're eating?

Speaker 1 57:42
I don't want a slice of pizza because I don't want to deal with it. No, I

Scott Benner 57:46
didn't ask if you want to deal with it. I asked you if you wanted a slice of pizza, like, like, if it wasn't anything to deal with, would you want it? Yes. So you're restricting yourself to avoid the other thing, yes, and that's that making you upset.

Speaker 1 58:00
I'm upset that it exists in my life. Yes, okay, yeah.

Scott Benner 58:04
Is it? Is it changing your life in bad ways, the food or just the whole thing, the decision making tree that you're in? Like,

Speaker 1 58:12
I am not as as strong, I think, as a lot of people on this podcast, because I I'm very unhappy, and I can be dark a lot of times about all of this. Like, I'm amazed when I see people that I know how much time and effort and everything that they put into managing it, and they still have a really good attitude. Like, it amazes me because I am angry, I'm bitter, I feel like I have this very diseased body that I can't fix. Yeah, I all of it, all of it awful. I hear

Scott Benner 58:48
what you're saying. Have you thought about therapy to try to work through it?

Speaker 1 58:51
So I went to one hesitantly last year, and, um, it was just, it was so unhelpful and like, she didn't even know what to say.

Scott Benner 59:02
You're like, I'm bitter, and I feel like I'm in a broken body. And she's like, Yeah, no kidding,

Speaker 1 59:08
yeah. I mean, I think it was because, like, I could tell her I'm like, but I'm also grateful for and I could name 100 things, and that's the truth. Like, I'm grateful for all these things, and I also, like, despise everything about my life right now, like, and it's an equal, and I think that's where they get stuck. They're like, Oh,

Scott Benner 59:26
would it be helpful like to just be able to voice it with somebody else who would come along and say, Hey, I feel better too. I think

Speaker 1 59:34
so. I mean, I don't. There's not like, I think there's something to be said about, like, camaraderie, right? Yeah, even though it's like, well, with type one, but there isn't the supports out there for adults. I think just because everybody's doing their own thing, generally mean, like, if there was a freaking adult camp, I'd be like, Sign me up. There

Scott Benner 59:51
is an adult go, yeah, there's an adult camp. Yeah. It's called connected in motion. It's a Canadian thing, but they come into to. Of the US in a couple of places. Oh, you don't have to look into that. Connected in motion, connected in motion. Yeah, I, by the way, said that out loud, even though someone was on here once, and said, Oh my god, I'd love for you to speak at a connected emotion thing. I'm gonna go talk to people, and then no one got back to me. And I'm still saying connected in motion, connected in motion. So you're welcome, even though, apparently you don't want me there. Meanwhile, I don't know if the guy ever actually asked or not, but still funny to say. What I'm thinking is, if there's a soft spot in community for type one adults, I think it's this. I think that when you get a bunch of people together and they're they're both children or parents of and adults with, and you put them all in the same place, they clearly have significantly different perspectives, you know, based on their age and their experiences, but even based on when they're diagnosed. And even though I think an adult can take a lot from a conversation with a caregiver, and I think a caregiver could take a lot from a conversation with an adult. I think what ends up happening sometimes is that parents can get very, I don't know what the word is like, defensive, or they don't want to talk about bad things happening, because right now, they're in the part where they're like, if I figured this out, nothing bad is going to happen. And they don't want to hear from somebody who's like, I feel bitter because they don't want to think their kid's going to feel better. Do you know what I mean? Oh,

Speaker 1 1:01:27
yeah, 100% and I've actually thought a little bit about that with, like, my kids, and I can confidently say that if, if it was my kids, I'd be like, we got this. Like, you don't have anything to worry about. I will always have your back. We will get through this, like, and I feel confident saying that. I don't know why it gets twisted when it's yourself. I

Scott Benner 1:01:48
don't, yeah, first of all, I want to say I don't feel. I understand how parents feel. And if you're in a group with my group's huge. It's 51,000 active people, you know, and so it, I get it. If you're, like, talking about, like, how do we get this right? And blah, blah, blah. And then like, 135 year old, like, Wiz in person comes in, and they're like, we're all gonna die. Like, you're just, like, putting on digital black eyeliner. And they're just like, Listen, man, give up. Like, like, like, you're like, you're like, I don't want to hear this, right? And that is just that. That is an end of one, you know, situation from one person's experience. But also, there's other people that feel like that, and it would be nice that they could all get together and go, I feel bitter and I don't want to feel this way, because you don't want to feel that way, correct, right? I don't, yeah, so, I mean, it's tough, because a support group would be really valuable. You know, I don't know if I'm I don't know if I'm supposed to say this out loud or not. What am I gonna do? The group experts in my Facebook group mostly have type one diabetes, where they're, you know, where they their kid does, right? And these are just lovely people who are donating their time to answering questions in the Facebook group. And mostly what they do is they're like, hey, check out this episode. Or you should try bold beginnings. Or have you tried the Pro Tip series? How about these variables? Like, it's a very nice thing they do in their free time, but they have a chat where they can talk privately so they can say, like, Hey, I just reported a post or, you know, can somebody get a message? I'm not in that chat, by the way, very purposely. I don't I'm not involved in it on purpose, so that they can feel free to talk and, you know, have camaraderie with each other. And I hear back through people that that is maybe the best type one diabetes support group in the world, is that those 15 people in that chat. Oh, interesting. I've really toyed with learning more about WhatsApp and starting maybe a WhatsApp group for people with diabetes, and letting there be a an adult, what's WhatsApp chat and a like, maybe let it be more specific, like the but I gotta learn. I'm literally in the middle of learning about it right now, because, like, would that be nice if you could go on the Facebook group and go, Oh my God, there's a whatsapp chat for adult women who were diagnosed later. Or, like, you know, like, very specific, like, genres of people that you could jump into. Would you find that valuable? I would, you would. Okay, all right, what have we not talked about here? Heather, that we

Speaker 1 1:04:26
should have? Well, my kids, we could throw, you want to throw that in? I

Scott Benner 1:04:29
mean, they're identical, they're already special, but sure, let's talk about it. What is there been like you're not married? Is that correct? That's correct. Yeah, okay, and yeah, that been for a while or never? Yes, okay, always I was gonna say because I didn't dig into it, because it wasn't our path. But 38 twins in vitro.

Speaker 1 1:04:48
No, no. So it was a surprise. It was a really good, amazing, best thing in my life. Surprise

Scott Benner 1:04:58
that, by the way, your voice. Jump three octaves there, just in case the kids hear this. It was a lovely surprise. It didn't happen after a bar crawl, if that's what you're asking. It did not,

Speaker 1 1:05:12
no, but yeah, it's just been the three of us. So, I mean, I think that's some of my anxiety with all of this. You don't

Scott Benner 1:05:18
want to die and leave two young kids behind is that your thinking 100% and your parents both dropped out early, correct? And at the moment, you look like you could go before them. Yeah, I was gonna say that's occur to you, right? Absolutely.

Speaker 1 1:05:31
That's what terrifies me, is like they're gonna come home and find me dead anyway, whatever

Scott Benner 1:05:42
it's just like, that's probably not gonna happen, which, by the way, that's probably not gonna happen. You're stuck because you found your mom basically over the phone. You know what? I mean, like you, yeah, and I would like to point out she was 23 years older than you are, and not in great health. You're probably in better health with type one diabetes than your mom was without it. Probably,

Speaker 1 1:06:02
I actually don't disagree with that, but it's definitely, you know, she lived alone. I live alone. I'm like, anyway, so with them, I quickly did that trial, net after I was diagnosed, okay, and, you know, everything was negative, blah, blah, blah. And then months later, think they were asking me, like, does it hurt when you check your blood sugar? And I'm like, No, it doesn't hurt at all. Blah blah blah, trying to make it like normal for them, right? And so I'm like, here, let me, I'll do you. You can see it. That's cool. You get to your number blah blah blah, check both of them. They're both like, 120 something. I don't remember what it was, and this was first thing in the morning. And so like, of course, like all the other parents, right? Because I've seen all these posts too, and I can relate to them. Like, instantly panic. And like, Go, wash your hands, come back. Say, wash your hands, come back. Seem, I'm like, I'd be kidding me. So then I call the PCP, like, can you please order antibody tests again, C peptide? And she's like, No, there's no reason to and I'm like, Look, this is what I just did. Please do this. I have a deductible. I'm paying for it anyway. And she's like, I can't do that. And I'm like, Well, what can you do? And she's like, well, I can order an A, 1c and I was upset because I'm like, it's not going to be high, but fine, whatever. Fair enough. Yeah, so we get them, and they're both 5.8 and I'm like, Oh, my What

Scott Benner 1:07:22
the hell are you telling me your kids have diabetes? Not there yet. All right, geez, Heather, wait, oh, wait a hold this cat in the bag past the first hour. Hold on. Let me. Let me just tell Rob now. Go ahead. Charge me overtime. I know good editing overtime coming my way. Don't worry about it. Go ahead, Heather, what do you got? Go

Speaker 1 1:07:39
ahead. Then I was like, she's like, Oh, it's 5.8 they're fine, blah, blah, blah. I'm like, That's not fine. Like, what are we talking about? And my kids aren't overweight or and they don't eat, I don't want to sound ignorant. I'd like to take that comment back.

Scott Benner 1:07:53
Yeah, it wouldn't matter how much they wait or what they ate, if they're everyone sees higher or not. Like, it's just is, yeah, they're, they're, they're, yeah, their pancreas is either doing its job or it's not right.

Speaker 1 1:08:03
Yeah, clearly wasn't. But she's like, it's fine. And I'm like, no, like, can you please, like, order these other labs? And she's like, well, I don't know how to interpret them. I'm like, they're either positive or native. Like, there's, like, there's not much more you can do with them.

Scott Benner 1:08:17
Oh, wait, if you don't know how to interpret them, why am I paying you

Speaker 1 1:08:22
right? They either have the antibodies or they don't. But anyway, so then I just tried to get into an endo, which, of course, they were like, without a referral. Blah blah blah. So then I had a big PCP again. I'm like, please send whatever these endos want. So the endo was at USF, so, and I purposely chose that. I'm like, be in good hands here. Blah, blah, blah. So then they do run the antibody labs, and only one of them comes back with one positive, and it was the zinc one, the c8 thing, okay, and the other one comes back with none of them positive, but it's just sitting out in, you know, the my chart thing for two weeks, like I saw and got the notification. I was devastated, right? I was devastated. Two weeks I heard nothing from them, so then I finally send them a message. I'm like, Hey, I'm a little disappointed. This is devastating. I've heard from no one, like, what are the next steps? Because I was surprised too, because I hear a lot of really positive stories from the pediatric endos. And I'm like, Well, how did I choose the bad one again? But anyway, she's basically like, nothing you can do. Watch and wait. We'll send a script for a glucometer like that.

Scott Benner 1:09:30
Was it like, Would you like a free meter?

Speaker 1 1:09:34
And I'm like, This can't be watch and wait. So then I look on the list that is on the site of recommended end of

Scott Benner 1:09:43
Juicebox docs.com under undervalued resource. But yes, I know what you're talking about. Go

Speaker 1 1:09:49
ahead and so I go to one that's listed there. And it was just we did a telehealth to make it the appointment sooner. She spent the first 20. Minutes. So it was, we're on, you know, the zoom, both my kids are here to spend the first 20 minutes basically accusing me of, like, Munchausen, like, why would you ever check your kids blood sugar? Like, that's totally unacceptable. Why would you do that? And I'm trying to explain to her, like, how it happened. It was very innocent. They were curious. I want them to feel normal when they see me doing it. Yeah. And she wouldn't let it go. So then I'm like, Listen, this is what happened to me. Like everybody ignored me, then I almost died. Here I am. And she's like, Oh, all right. Like, this is one of the this was one of the recommended ones.

Scott Benner 1:10:33
Though I don't know what to tell you, everybody sucks, but they do.

Speaker 1 1:10:38
But then she continues to say that's not even the worst part. She says in front of my kids that I likely passed this to them in my placenta while I was pregnant. She said this to the three of us

Scott Benner 1:10:51
wait past what a higher a one thing, one type one. Oh, yes. Oh, that's not how that works. But okay,

Speaker 1 1:10:58
all right, so my my one son starts to cry, yeah, because he's

Scott Benner 1:11:02
like, why in the did I asked to have my blood sugar check? That was a guy that was like, Why did I say? Does that hurt? This was really the start of a bad decision making trick for me. Oh, my God, yes. You kid how old? He's like, 1110, they're

Speaker 1 1:11:16
11, so they're already getting to the point where, right, they're starting to be teens, and I'm not cool anymore, and, like, I suck for a variety of reasons. So now this lady's telling them, I've just given them, like, you know, this chronic condition. I'm just looking at her, and I'm like, never heard that before. And she's like, Oh yeah, absolutely,

Scott Benner 1:11:34
yeah, oh yeah, absolutely,

Unknown Speaker 1:11:37
I went pregnant too. She's pregnant.

Scott Benner 1:11:41
I don't know what that means, but Okay, good. Just that she should at least know, like, maybe

Speaker 1 1:11:46
she should, like, pregnant Endo, yeah. But anyway,

Scott Benner 1:11:50
a prendo. She's a prendo. Let's go with that. Okay.

Speaker 1 1:11:54
And then she just then started talking about, like, 45 carbs, or maybe it was 60, because I don't listen to any of this. I'm just like, all right. And then she's like, we need to refer you to weight management. And I was just like,

Scott Benner 1:12:08
for the kids, yes. Are they overweight? No,

Speaker 1 1:12:11
my kids are very skinny. My kids are 70 pounds when they're 11 years old. They've always been skinny, though, so it's not like a recent did she want them to put weight on? I know, because I didn't ask, because, like, at that point, right? Like I was done was like, whatever she said, like the respect was lost, or whatever she said, I didn't care, and didn't feel that it was valid in any way.

Scott Benner 1:12:34
Well, where are we now? Where are we now with the kids? So

Speaker 1 1:12:38
back to USF and the one actually has an appointment coming up in a couple of weeks, so I've been randomly checking. And the one that did not test positive for any of the antibodies, his are always below 100 like before meals after meals, like it seems fine. The other one, it's that it's not been anything over 140 but it's certainly a fasting 140s No? So the highest fasting has been like 130 something. I mean, close enough. I guess I don't

Scott Benner 1:13:11
think you should be able to wake up in the morning with a 130 blood sugar, though, I don't disagree with you. Yeah, that sounds junky to me. I think he's the one you're looking at like they're gonna need to be paying attention to,

Speaker 1 1:13:22
yeah, and he's the one that's going right. Um, so Well, first

Scott Benner 1:13:25
of all, let me say I'm sorry. Um, if that's what ends up happening, I'm I feel poorly. That's what's happening. But I'm glad you caught it and that you're ahead of it. It sucks that this is the that this is what happens when you try to go to doctors over and over, even the ones that people are like, Oh my God, this doctor is great. And then you go up there and they're like, are you why? Why are you checking their blood sugar? Like, how about this? How about hey, it seems like you really caught something here. Good thing. You check their blood sugar. Yeah. Again, everyone always sees something bad. It's backwards. How many times you look at someone and go, how is that the reaction you're having? Like, why not have why not this reaction over here? Like, oh, because what an opportunity to say, hey, it's great. You caught this early. If it's going to turn into something, we're going to know. We're going to be able to take care of it. Your mom already has type one, so you're already like, if that's what happens with you, then we're going to already know what to do. Boy, this is lucky. Like, just couch it differently. Like, right? You know what I mean, instead of looking at the kids and going see what this old bitch did to you, huh? I know,

Speaker 1 1:14:24
I know. Like, Jesus Christ, there was nothing beneficial for that comment, like, what am I supposed to do go back in time and not have them? If that was even true, which it's not true. But no, it's then my one son told me afterwards. He's like, I'm never gonna have kids because I don't want to do this to them. And I'm like, That's great. Yeah, that's great. Thanks, lady. And then my bill, let's not forget the bill. So

Scott Benner 1:14:46
what did it cost for her to make your kid upset and not want to have children, my God, and

Speaker 1 1:14:50
to accuse me? So for each visit, she charged for two even though we did it as a group, which is fine, she'd billed my insurance $2,100 Gosh, I'm not kidding you. And you know the contracted rate, I owe them 1100

Scott Benner 1:15:08
Listen, I want to say something I know. I tell people that my kids see, like, for endocrinology, we see a cash pay doctor, and then it's covered by my insurance. Like, I forget what it is, like 85 or 90% or something like that. In case, I've never said this out loud, the visits are 350 bucks. They're not $2,100 I know. And then they cover whatever they cover, and I end up paying like, 40 or $50 for my kids to see a doctor. Oh, wow, yeah. So my point is, is that $2,100 to get that hit? Level of care is ridiculous. I know every decent Doctor in the world is going to switch to cash pay. You're going to end up. We are going to end up. Everybody, like every decent Doctor, is going to start saying, I don't take insurance. You can send it in later. That's what dentists office do. By the way, a lot of doctors offices do that. They're like, look, I don't take your damn insurance. Go turn it into them later, and I'm sure you'll get reimbursed for most of it. But, like, I'm not getting involved in this game. And good doctors all over the place are doing this now. Now you got to be careful, because eventually doctors are going to do it too. But right now, the ones who can, um, pull their weight, and people know, and they know that they can run a basically, that they can run a business on word of mouth. That's what it really is. By the way, it's like they know they're good, and other people will tell other people about them, and they and to make a reasonable living, they don't have to work all day long. They can actually help you and sit my my kids doctor's appointments are 30 minutes long, if they're telehealth, and when we go in there, they're an hour. Oh, wow, yeah, you go, and you sit, you sit in a lovely chair next to a table with a lamp, and you have a conversation, like a human being, and you listen. They listen to everything. And when you leave there, everything's done. Scripts are taken care of, you know, if you need a blood work, it's all filled out. It's explained to you. This is what we're going to do. It's what we're looking for. You know, like all the stuff's done, you get a physical exam, a conversation, you know, and it's 350 bucks, and then when it's over, I only I pay, like, 50. It's amazing. It's not amazing. It's just you just, it's just reasonable, like, you just have to find reasonable people. That's the problem, is finding reasonable people.

Speaker 1 1:17:15
I mean, I would, I'm paying more than 350 and I don't get any of that, I'd happily pay 350 for someone to actually do their job. I

Scott Benner 1:17:24
texted with my doctor recently. I was like, I was like, Hey, I'm on my way to the pharmacy to pick this up. If they don't have it, what do you want me to do? And she's like, Oh, if they don't have it, text me and I'll just send another script for this instead. Wow, yeah, that's all. Find a reasonable person. It's not easy. I'm dumb beyond dumb luck that I found this person. But seriously, I don't know. It's just it's very upsetting to hear that somebody charged you $2,100 to make your kids sad, to say, to say that you were like, involved in Munch house since activities and to then not help with anything. All right, I don't know what to tell you. Good luck. You're all dead. It's not gonna know what you're gonna do. Like, exciting Are you made me upset? I'm gonna have lunch now, but

Speaker 1 1:18:15
so you shouldn't be, because truly, I know everybody says it, because it's true. Like, thank God for this group. Thank God for all the members and their insight and sharing their knowledge, their frustrations, like, all of it. Like, oh, we're all better because of this community. Like, just facts, I obviously,

Scott Benner 1:18:33
I mean, obviously I agree, and I appreciate you saying it. But it all it makes me feel like, is, I don't reach enough people. Like, every time, like I, I just said, this is somebody privately, but I'll say it here, even though it probably makes me sound crazy. Every time someone says something positive to me, I just think, well, there's I'm just I'm letting other people down. Like, if it works this, well, then why can't I reach more people with it and help more people. And so that's the part that just it kind of It breaks my heart. It keeps me up at night, kind of thing, like trying to figure out, like, how do you grow this? And I'll tell you the truth. Heather, the other day, I had a conversation with a person in the podcasting like space, like someone who works behind the scenes podcast hosting so they know, like, you know, they know what's what's what I was saying to this person, I don't know. Man, I'm like, I'm not growing this thing fast enough, like, it helps people, but it's not expanding quickly enough and to reach more people, because, you know, it How long can I do this for? I'm trying to help people now, that kind of thing. And we were on a on a like a Google meet up or something like that. And he said, Let me send you something. And I was like, okay, so he sends me this graphic, and I'm looking for it right now, see if I can find it. And he pulls this graphic up, and he says, Scott. He goes, buy down. Load, you're in the top 2% of all podcasts that exist in the world. Wow. And I was like, that's not possible. And he said, Now the 2% that are above you. He goes, actually, the 1% above you, you could reach, like, you could get into the top, like, 99 percentile. He's like, That's not undoable for you. He goes, that 1% above. He's like, you're not getting to that. He's like, no one's getting to that. That's dumb luck, smart list. Joe Rogan, kind of like space, you know what? I mean? Like 30 million people are listening to an episode that kind of stuff. He's like, you're not reaching that. He goes, No one reaches that. And I was like, okay, he goes, but you're right there. If you could grow 65 more percent, you'd be in the top 1% and he's like, Oh, wow. He goes, what is it you want? I was like, I want to reach more people with diabetes. And he goes, you're reaching as many people as this. This format allows. He's like, no one else is doing that. He's like, all those other shows are, like, comedy or famous people or something like that. And I was like, right? He goes, he's like, you, you've done it. You're, you're at the pinnacle right now. And he and he starts typing around. He goes, Look. He goes, I found a couple other podcasts where there were diabetes in the title. And I said, Okay. And he goes, there's a couple of them here. And he said, they pop up and down on these, like, low level on these sub category charts. They'll pop in over like the top 200 every once in a while, and they drop out again. And I was like, right? He goes, you get more downloads on an episode in the first two hours it's out than these people will get in the entire time their episode exists. And he's like, and those people are your closest competition. Oh, wow. And you would think that I'd leave that conversation and be like, I am doing it. And instead I left the conversation like, so then there's no way I can get better at this. Like, I can't reach more people and help more people. Like, listen to what Heather just said about the community and the group and the podcast and everything. Like, I can't, like, why can't I find more people? It's a very upsetting reality to learn that you've grown something as big as it almost possibly could be, and yet it's touching such a small percentage of people who live with diabetes that it feels like a failure when you judge it against how many people are walking around with diabetes? Do you know what I mean?

Unknown Speaker 1:22:10
Yeah, but I think that's a dark way to look at it.

Scott Benner 1:22:13
Oh, thanks, bitter.

Unknown Speaker 1:22:18
Welcome to the dark.

Scott Benner 1:22:19
No point in this conversation. Heather, did I just tell you to happy up? Did i?

Speaker 1 1:22:26
So, let me tell you this to make you feel better. So I've also heard about your podcast from Omada, which, you know who, what Omada is, right? The Diabetes platform through employers.

Scott Benner 1:22:40
No, I don't. I have no idea what that can I tell you a big secret about how I've grown it this big? Yeah, I don't pay attention to anything anyone else is doing. Okay, I don't care what anybody else is doing. I know this works. So I don't like, look out into the world for what's going on. I really don't like, like, when that guy mentioned these other two podcasts to me, he said the names of them, and I was like, I don't. I'm like, I've heard of that one, but I've never listened to it. And that other one, I don't know what you're talking about, so it's

Speaker 1 1:23:06
not a podcast. So it's, it's something that's offered through my employer, just, oh, and it's, I think it's more geared towards type two, but, and it's just, I mean, there's so many of these types of programs, right? They'll help you with coaching and nutrition and just different things to make your life better. It's diabetes related. But my coach that I have mentioned, hey, you should start listening. Juicebox. I'm like I already do. And then that blue circle health, which I know a couple people have posted on the page about that, which I thought was a little suspect, but I decided to check it out anyway. They also said you should check out Juicebox Podcast. I'm like I already do. So those are two professional organizations that are very well aware of the podcast, that are spreading the word and sharing that with with their patients clients, however you want

Scott Benner 1:23:57
to thank you to them very much. Also, I Googled Omada Health, and I see they're valued as a billion dollar company, and I'm over here worrying about the overtime on my podcast recording. But I guess, okay, you know, if I had a billion dollars, I know what I would do with it, and I know how I'd help more people with diabetes. But also I it's very possible I would just go to a beach. I tell you guys, you're all on your own, so just, let's be, let's be grateful. Maybe that's not happening. I appreciate that, and I know that. Like, look, I see people coming into the private Facebook group every day. How did you hear about this? My doctor told me, my nurse told me, a lady whispered it to me in the hallway at my endos office, like, you know, like I know, I know it's everywhere. It charts in 48 countries. I'm not unaware of any of that. It's just that if there's 1.8 billion or million people walking around with type one diabetes, and even though the group is huge at 50,000 people, that's not 1.8 million. And I'm not saying everybody would like me, or everybody would is even interested, but doesn't it feel like there should be a bigger percentage of than that? Yeah. Who I could make aware of it, at the very least, like, that's the part that, like it feels like you've done a lot and it's not enough. That that feeling, I live with that feeling a lot. I manage it. I used to not manage it. Well, I don't feel badly about it anymore, but it is how I think about the business side of what I'm doing and how I'm trying to drive things and make them grow. There's more people out there that need help. They don't. They don't know the podcast exists. Like, that's the thing I'm trying to get squared away somehow. I don't. I don't care if I'm in the top 1% or like, of podcasts. Like, that's really cool. I can't believe I'm just blowing past that. Actually, Heather gets real. It's an insane accomplishment, okay, but, but it's, it says a lot of things, you know, about the content, about the delivery. You know, it says good things about me, which I would probably do well to celebrate once in a while, maybe more than I do. I don't know, like, it just seems to me like this is a thing that I've seen help a lot of people, and whether it's going to help everyone, I don't think it could, but I wish they had the opportunity to find out if it was going to be valuable for them or not. And that seems like that's my responsibility, because who's else? Is it?

Speaker 1 1:26:11
You have to realize that there's going to be a subset of that population, of that 1.8 that is happy to manage at. I'm not gonna assign a number to it,

Scott Benner 1:26:22
whatever. Yeah, they're not looking to upgrade. They're good with micromanage,

Speaker 1 1:26:26
yeah, right. I mean, and like, that's okay. Not everybody's right. No, yeah, I don't have a problem

Scott Benner 1:26:33
with that. I don't want to sound crazy. That was my that's why I didn't want to bring us up. I don't want to sound crazy like, I don't think every 1.8 million people is out there in their mind, and they're mine, and I should get them as a listener. I get that there's a swath of them who are like, Hey, I'm good. Or maybe they actually just are good, like, they're like, I I managed a 681 say, I'm fine. And there's a group of people who are like, Oh, listen, I have a 781 say, and I ain't looking to make this any better, so blah, blah, or I don't have the bandwidth for this, or whatever. But at a 1.8 million Americans. Like, you'd think that 50,000 wouldn't be such a big number for a Facebook group, or that the amount of downloads that I do per episode, which I'm not going to share with you. Like, I look at that number, and I think that seems like a really small number compared to the possibilities of who would be interested in this but yet it's not, it's right in the top 2%

Unknown Speaker 1:27:24
Yeah, I think it's huge. It is, but it's

Scott Benner 1:27:27
still, listen, Heather, it is, but it's still disappointing to me. Okay, listen, yeah, but you just let me be upset. Jesus Christ. And it's not that. It's not enough. It feels like a missed opportunity. No, I hear you, yeah, I know I do. I'm trying to be funny and and say how I feel at the same time, because I don't want to, like, I don't want this to sound like, all like, boo hoo, because I'm doing great. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I know I'm doing well, and I know, and I know I'm doing well

Speaker 1 1:27:54
everyone, and that's like, admirable, yeah, not everyone is like, I would imagine the vast majority of us are type A, right, and we're micromanaging and we're making ourselves crazy because we can do X, Y, Z, right? I think we all probably have a similar personality type. Not everybody has that. Do you know what I mean? I know? Like, yeah, I do know what's crazy in this group of you know, I've been high for two seconds. What do I do now? And like, there'll be 100 people that chime in of this is what you can

Scott Benner 1:28:28
do. Yeah, get over here right now. Do this? Do that? Do this. Bing, bang, boom. It's all set. I learned that in episode 763 of the Juicebox Podcast. Like, like, I know, I see it all the time. It's, it's so wonderful. Like, it really, it just sometimes it melts my heart. Sometimes it makes it feel like it's going to like it's going to explode with like, Joy. Like, seriously, some days I have a bad day, and then someone comes over and is like, Look, I just wanted to share with you that this happened for me or for my kid or, you know, like, you have no idea. Like, I shudder to say this because I grew up in blogging, where somebody who was blogging to 50 people would do that thing where they're like, I get notes all the time because they're trying to make themselves seem bigger in the space. You know what I mean? Like, that happens a lot, whether you would know or not. I get them every five minutes. Like, like, they come in 73 different ways, through DMS and private messages and emails and some people who I can't believe but I gave them my my my phone number one time. And like, you know, like, and like, I probably get 20 or 25 notes a day, oh, wow, from people who are like, hey, oh, this thing, this thing, this guy made, like, look what it did. You know what I mean, and, and just doesn't feel like I'm reaching enough people I don't know they could just, it's, it's upsetting, like, and, and it's, it's and it's heartwarming at the same time. It's a weird space to be in. The way it feels is distasteful to say out loud, but it, but it's like, it's like that last episode of Schindler's List, when Oscar Schindler realizes he's wearing a pin that he could have, he could have sold it. Yeah. Like, it's not, obviously, this is not an apples to apples comparison, but like that feeling of I was out here doing everything I could, and I still didn't cover it the way I feel like I could have, yeah, and then, and then days pass, and I get older, you know what I mean? And I'm like, I don't know how long I can keep this going for so and then what happens to everybody after it's gone?

Unknown Speaker 1:30:24
So you think, hey, that's giving me anxiety. You

Scott Benner 1:30:27
think you're bitter, I'm dark too. Like, I'm trying to, like, you know what? It's funny, it's like, it's Be careful what you wish for. Like, what's worse than not helping people, helping people, and then not being able to help the rest of them like now, it's tangible like before, it's just a wish. I think I could help people, but I couldn't figure out a way to do it. Oh well, but I actually figured out I could help them, and now I can't figure out how to get to more of them. That feels like a failing for me.

Speaker 1 1:30:58
Excellent. I think that just makes you a good person, an honest person, someone with integrity. Do you know what I mean? Like you care. I think that's admirable, okay, a good quality to have, even though it makes you dark.

Scott Benner 1:31:11
All right? Well, I'm not, but I'm, generally speaking, I'm not, you know? I'm like, I'm upbeat, I know, yeah, I just That's all this was upset you you bump me out. Heather, no, it's not your fault. Don't worry about I'm just trying

Speaker 1 1:31:23
to recruit people into, like, the dark chat group you're gonna create. I just

Scott Benner 1:31:27
want people in the in the WhatsApp called bitter Heather. Well, listen, I actually think there'd be value on that. So

Speaker 1 1:31:37
it would have to be balanced, because, right, like you want to vent, but then you want to let it go. Yeah,

Scott Benner 1:31:43
it doesn't. It's not gloomy or anything like that. Afterwards, it's just like, This is how it feels. And I just want to know that other people have felt this too. So I just looked at my email. Hi, we are two days into our two year old being diagnosed. I just finished episode three of the Juicebox Podcast. This diagnosis is another kick in the face to our family that's dealing with another chronic illness already. I really appreciate your words. I feel broken, so broken. Thank you for some hope now you would think that I'd read that and go look at this. I'm going to help this person, this little two year old kid, is going to have a better life, and his parents are going to be better off because they found this podcast two days into it. I know that's true because I've seen it happen 10s of 1000s of times, but they'll but later I'll just think, like, how can I find more people like that to help? And then that sounds pompous, doesn't it? And then that's a different problem. God damn it. Heather, that's not what it is. Yeah, I know it's not, but it sounds somebody right now is listening to a gun. Oh, this asshole thinks he can help everybody. Let's see Jesus ran around. I don't feel that. I don't feel like that. I just, I made this thing overwhelmingly, it helps people. I just want to give it to them. You know what? I mean?

Speaker 1 1:32:55
Yeah, that's all. And that email is, like, heartbreaking all

Scott Benner 1:32:59
day long, all day long. Like, don't stop sending emails. But some days I click on that, I'm like, oh, here we go. You know what I mean? You're like, it's, it's time to, like, absorb somebody else's sorrow for a minute. And like, because I really want to, I want to feel what he's saying, This guy, you know what I mean, into this person. If you ever hear this, you're going to be like, Oh, my God, that was five years ago. I guess he's on episode three. He's gonna, like, this kid's gonna be 17. He's gonna be like, Oh my god, I think I'm the one that sent that email. I don't know, Heather, we gotta stop. This is costing me a lot of money over time. Editing. Okay, all right, don't fit. And also, I don't want Rob feeling bad. He should get paid for his work. You know what? I mean, you don't even know who Rob is. You're like, Well, no, he's the guy that edits the show. It's fantastic, by the way, all right, light, hold on. I'm gonna say goodbye. That's enough of this. You were great, by the way, thank you. I was so great to talk to you. Thank you. Oh, no, I had a great time. Hold on one

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#1383 I'm Not Calm

Tess is a mother of four, her third child has type 1 diabetes. He plays a lot of sports.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Here we are back together again, friends for another episode of The Juicebox Podcast.

Tess is the mother of four children, one of them who has type one diabetes. Her kids play a ton of travel sports, and her son's diagnosis was missed by their pediatrician.

Please don't forget that nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your health care plan or becoming bold with insulin. When you place your first order for ag one, with my link, you'll get five free travel packs and a free year supply of vitamin D drink. AG, one.com/juice, box. Don't forget to save 40% off of your entire order at cozy earth.com. All you have to do is use the offer code juice box at checkout. That's Juicebox at checkout to save 40% at cozy earth.com. Don't forget, if you're a US resident who has type one, or is the caregiver of someone with type one, visit T 1d exchange.org/juice box right now and complete that survey. It will take you 10 minutes to complete the survey, and that effort alone will help to move type one diabetes research forward. It will cost you nothing to help. Today's podcast is sponsored by us Med, US med.com/juicebox you can get your diabetes supplies from the same place that we do. And I'm talking about Dexcom, libre, Omnipod, tandem, and so much more us. Med.com/juice box, or call, 888-721-1514, this show is sponsored today by the glucagon that my daughter carries. G, voke hypo pen. Find out more at G, VO, glucagon.com. Forward slash, juice box. I'm having an on body vibe alert. This episode of the juice box podcast is sponsored by ever since 365 the only one year where CGM that's one insertion and one CGM a year, one CGM one year, not every 10 or 14 days ever since cgm.com/juicebox

Tess 2:27
My name is Tess, and I have four children. I have a 15 year old, a 13 year old, an 11 year old, who is my type, one diabetic, and

Scott Benner 2:39
an eight year old. How'd you mess up the spacing on the last one? What do you mean? I messed it up. They're all two years apart until the third, right? Until the one's three years apart, right? Well, to get tired a lot.

Tess 2:53
Yeah, three's a lot, actually. When I told my parents, who helped us that out a lot, it's the only reason we have four kids. When I told them I was pregnant with the last they were just silent, and I had to tell them, You're supposed to say congratulations.

Scott Benner 3:05
They were like, but we're never gonna stop watching your children. I think, right. Well, I just figured you were considering getting divorced. Now you decided not to. That's where the extra year came from.

Tess 3:19
Nope. We always wanted four. Actually, my husband would have way more if I let him, but kids are expensive, so

Scott Benner 3:25
really, your husband would like more children. Yes, he loves kids. Can I ask? Is he one of those people who loves kids but it's not that involved? Or is he really super involved?

Tess 3:34
No, he's really involved. He's their coach. Half my kids coaches for all their sports and and he loves babies, kids. He just loves kids. I do too, but not like him wreak havoc on your body. So I was done after four.

Scott Benner 3:49
This is like, I can't do this again. That's enough. Was he in for another one? Yeah, oh yeah, he would be. He said something like, he was like, Hey, do you think we should have five kids? Yeah. Oh, you say Get away from me. And then you struck him with a bat. Is that correct? Correct? And now that bat is now leaning on your side table of your bed, exactly. It's over for you, buddy. Get back. That's amazing. Well, congratulations on I mean, I'll do what your parents wouldn't do. Congratulations on your four kids. Like, was there any indication that type one might be in your life? Is it, you know, in an extended family, or anything like that? Nope, no indication at all. We have no one in the family with it, no one. No one just hey, congratulations. Here it is. Gotcha. What about other stuff? Meaning, celiac, hypothyroidism, anything like that,

Tess 4:43
nothing. I don't know. Does eczema count? Yeah, two of my kids have kind of dry skin like, that's about it.

Scott Benner 4:50
I count eczema. It's not a big one, but, yeah, sure, right, then, that's it, gotcha, that's it. Don't be damn All right. Well, lucky you. Yeah, right. How did. How did it happen? What was the first sign? Because if you if you weren't looking for it, you don't know about it. I'm interested in how you figured it out.

Tess 5:06
Yeah, his story is kind of interesting. So in June, 2020 he was six years old, almost seven, and he wet the bed one night. And I was like, well, that's strange. You know, he never wets the bed. So the next night, Hey, buddy, you gotta go to the bathroom before you go to bed. And he did, but he wet the bed again, like, all right, this is weird. So the next night, all right, you're not drinking anything after 6pm and he did not wet the bed that night. But for the next few weeks, he was wetting the bed like three to four times a week. And I was like, This is strange. Like, this is this kid, once he was potty trained, that was it. He hasn't went to bed, you know, really, ever. Maybe the first couple moms said he was potty trained at three. So I decided to call the pediatrician, and I made an appointment. And at this point, I had checked with Dr Google, and of course, Dr Google will tell you that bed wetting is a sign of type one diabetes. I had a friend whose teenage son had been diagnosed about six months ago, so I did call her up and just ask. And she said, Well, it's, you know, it's very simple. The pediatrician will have you, you know, pee in a cup, and if there's any sugar in his urine, they'll they'll probably send you right to the hospital. I made the appointment. I packed a hospital bag because I really thought it might be that I didn't tell my son. I didn't want to scare him, so I put it in the back of my husband's car. I sent my husband because he is much better with doctors and hospitals and needles and all that stuff than me. And I was waiting for his call, and he called me up. I was out on a walk with my other son, who was three at that time, my husband called and said, Doctor says he looks great. Urine is fine. Vitals are good, you know? And I remember just bursting into tears of joy, like so happy that it wasn't diabetes. I did say, though, why is he wetting the bed? And the pediatrician had told my husband, well, you know, COVID had just shut down the whole world a few months ago in March, and this was beginning of June. And so the pediatrician had just said, you know, the kids, all their schedules are off, everything, their whole worlds have been rocked. You know, school shut down, everything shut down. He's probably just wetting the bed because of that so, well, great. You know, I don't have a kid who's a type one diabetic. That's wonderful.

Scott Benner 7:27
He's just peeing in his bed. And he's a little too old for that, but, okay, right? But

Tess 7:32
he just, you know, diabetes, COVID, yeah, that was like, in the middle of the week. And then that weekend, we went to the beach for just a little little getaway couple days, and my son was walking towards the water, like in his bathing suit, away from me, and I could see every rib in his back. And I thought, he's a skinny kid. All my kids are thin, but I'd never seen his ribs from the back before. Yeah. And actually turned to my friend and I said, Gosh, like, you know, just something doesn't seem right. He just doesn't seem well to me. But that pediatrician checked him out, said he was fine. So what do I know? I'm not a doctor. I

Scott Benner 8:09
have a friend who's a pediatrician who would tell you he's not a doctor, he's a pediatrician. But go ahead, interesting. Here's how he here's how he told me, one day he goes, my father's not a doctor, he's a dentist. I'm not a doctor, I'm a pediatrician. And I don't know if that's like a professional joke or not, but anyway, go. I apologize. You're talking to your friend on the beach. Your kid looks very thin. What'd you figure

Tess 8:30
out? Yeah, well, so we go home and he's still, you know, he's kind of wetting the bed, but that was really the only symptom at the time. You know, he did, he wasn't, didn't have the extreme thirst yet? Well, obviously, me seeing the ribs in his back indicated he was losing weight, but he was, he was skinny anyways, so I didn't notice it, you know, a drastic change. So we get home, my gut just said, just, he's not well. And so I called the pediatrician again. I called like the nurse line, just left a message. It had been one week, and I said, you know, he was checked out in the office last week, but I just some he just doesn't seem that well. By now, he was asking to take naps, which was very strange for him. He hadn't nap since he gave them up at two years old, so he was really tired. The nurse called me back and she said, Hey, I talked with the doctor, the pediatrician, if you will. And he said that, you know, everything was fine, but since you're still worried, he'll go ahead and order some blood work just to make you feel better. So she sent the orders over that Friday afternoon, and I went online to make an appointment. And again, like diabetes was out of my mind now because, you know, the doctor said it wasn't that so what was in your mind at that point? I really didn't know. Okay, I really wasn't sure, but I knew, like, something is very wrong with him. And so I went to make the blood work appointment. And it was Friday afternoon. I was gonna wait till Monday, and something in my gut said, don't wait till Monday. See if. There's appointments tomorrow morning, Saturday morning. So I checked and there was an appointment. So I booked it online. Saturday morning comes. I send my husband, because, again, I don't, I don't do that stuff. You know, he's, he's more calm than me with you

Scott Benner 10:13
wanted all these kids go to the blood work exactly.

Tess 10:18
That's his job and this relationship. And so my husband took him and my little, my little six year old going off to get blood work. He was scared, but he was so brave. And so my husband called me when he's done, he said, Oh, he was he was so brave. He did such a good job. I'm going to take him to 711 to get a Slurpee to celebrate how brave he was so perfect. You can imagine what, what a Slurpee does that night, my son got very sick. I ended up sleeping with him in his bed, and he was like smacking his lips like and his lips were all dry. Looking back now, he was severely dehydrated, and he was waking up to urinate every hour and a half. And I laid there and listened to him peeing, and I could not believe how much urine was coming out of that little body. I thought, how, how can he be producing this much urine? Yeah, he's tiny, and he just peed an hour and a half ago, and then he was going to the sink and just gulping water. And I knew, I knew he was so sick, but again, I what diabetes was out the doctor said. But I laid there that night thinking, I should, I should get up and take him to the hospital now. But again, I don't. I don't like hospital. So to been my, my husband's job, and he's not a middle of the night person. So I said, oh, we'll wait. We'll wait till the morning. No one gets

Scott Benner 11:33
sick at night here, we don't let that right? You can't, you can't. You know, I've had people on the podcast who discussed one person was diagnosed as, like a baby, and their family found them drinking out of

Tess 11:44
the toilet. Oh, I remember that. Yeah, that's, that's the

Scott Benner 11:47
draw. And then you were restricting his his liquid there for a little walk. Imagine how like, thirsty he was and how compliant he was to listen to that's really, yeah, okay, I'm sorry. Go ahead, poor kid. Yeah, look at you. No, I'm just kidding.

Tess 12:03
Why'd I have a fourth after that? Now it's Sunday morning, and now my son's vomiting. I call the pediatricians, obviously close, but I call the on call doctor. It's a large practice, so there's many pediatricians there. I leave a message. I explained, you know, he was just seen. It had been exactly 10 days since I had had him in the office. He was just seen. He checked out, but he's really sick now. I explained, what's going on. I explained that he had just gotten blood work yesterday morning, but I didn't know if blood work, you know, came in on Sundays or whatever. Right left the message. Got a call back within 10 minutes, and it was a different pediatrician than the one I had seen 10 days prior. And she said, I just saw his blood work. His blood sugar is extremely high. You've got to get him to a hospital right away. And she said, and I looked back at his urine sample from 10 days ago, and I'm not sure how my colleague missed it, but there was glucose in his urine back then, oh, we've got

Scott Benner 13:01
Yeah. So we got somebody who put their glasses on before they look at your stuff. That's nice, good. Did you say yeah? 10 days ago, I tried to tell you all this, nobody listened to me. Yeah. I'll wait to hear what happens next. Does it have something to do with you? Throwing something because I can't wait. I'm excited. Go ahead. No,

Tess 13:17
no. So, of course, I say it's also COVID, so only one parent is allowed to go right to the hospital. So guess who goes? Because, yeah, like hospitals, and I wanted to go to the local one, like, you know, the county one, because it's just closer. And the on call pediatrician said, Oh no, you need to go downtown, where there's a, you know, to a big university that has a pediatric endocrinologist, you know, on staff at all times. So she gave me a couple of options. We have some world renowned hospitals right in our area, here on the East Coast. And so I picked the one that I had heard of the most, and sent my husband off. And they got there and they said he was a few hours away from the ICU. He did not need to go into the ICU, but I suspect it may be because it's such a big hospital. They have an entire pediatric endocrinology floor alone, and so I'm thinking maybe they were just better equipped to handle it because he was so sick he was in DKA,

Scott Benner 14:20
yeah, maybe his blood gasses were on the right side of horrifying that they were able to manage it somewhere else. Who knows? They didn't tell you, right? Yeah,

Tess 14:28
no, they didn't tell me.

Scott Benner 14:30
Can Can I stop you for a second? Sure, nobody likes hospitals. Why do you extra not like them?

Tess 14:36
I'm not calm, like my husband has a very calm demeanor. I get very anxious, and I was afraid, like my son would pick up on that, and wouldn't, I wouldn't be calm for him and my husband has the more calming presence when it comes to, like, scary stuff like that, like hospitals and stuff. Do you think

Scott Benner 14:54
people come on the podcast intent on naming their episodes because I'm not calm? Is a strong contour. Under for you, like a wonderfully declarative statement, because you're very You seem very calm now, and you're like, I'm not calm. And I'm like, oh, okay, so you were worried that you'd freak the kid out.

Tess 15:12
Yes, exactly okay. And I'm more calm now, Scott, because after my son's diagnosis and being completely on edge for about six months, I had to, had to go on a little medicine to help me be a little calmer. Oh, you're calmer now, yes, because every blood sugar alarm had me, you know, quaking and so do you

Scott Benner 15:31
get that adrenaline kick when you hear it?

Tess 15:33
Yes? And like, scared, yeah, in the beginning, yeah. Would

Scott Benner 15:37
it not go away? Then

Tess 15:38
it depended how bad the low blood sugar was. We had some scary lows in the beginning. I

Scott Benner 15:44
say, Okay, we'll hear about that later. Okay, sorry, back to the hospital. You and that guy that wanted all these babies are yes, you know, you split up the duties. You've got the three sleep. Did you have only three kids at that point? Or do you have four at that

Tess 15:57
point even? No, I had four. The fourth one was about three years old. Okay, so you're

Scott Benner 16:01
at home with your the other he's at the hospital. They move him and what do they what happens? Because I feel like something's about to happen.

Tess 16:10
Yeah, this, this is the, this is the punch line, I guess. So, the next day, Monday, my husband gets a call from the pediatrician who had missed the sugar, the glucose in his urine, and he apologized profusely. He did not make any excuses. My husband said he was very sincere. He said, You know, there's no excuse. I simply missed it.

Scott Benner 16:33
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Tess 17:37
and I'm so sorry. I was devastated when I heard that you guys were in the hospital with this, and here's the kicker, he said, and I should have known, because I'm a type one diabetic myself, and I was diagnosed around six years old when I started wetting the bed.

Scott Benner 17:52
I don't know why. I didn't think of it, right? That sounds so familiar. No, no, no, I think he's fine, right? Did your husband laugh at him?

Tess 18:04
I think my husband was more pleasant than I would have been to me. That's even worse, like, you know this disease,

Scott Benner 18:10
I know for certain, my response would have been, get the out of here. Look, that's exactly what I would have said if you said that to me. Oh, my God. Well, that's crazy, but okay, yeah, and it was nice of him to be so direct, because I think in a litigious world, people don't usually admit that they don't do anything, right? So that was, that was kind of him. You guys were accepting of his apology, or did you go toilet paper his house later? So

Tess 18:34
we actually had, you know, I knew from here on out, you know, he's my son would be seeing a pediatric endocrinologist quarterly. So we still needed a pediatrician for the minor illnesses throughout his life, and I didn't want to see that man ever again. And my husband said, well, don't you want our son's pediatrician to have the same disease that he has and really understand it? And I said, Oh, you have a point there. I'll tell

Scott Benner 18:59
you what I would have thought, I would have thought he's in our debt now he's going to try extra hard for us. That's how I would have thought of it.

Tess 19:08
That's true. I didn't think of it like that, but I my husband. I was like, alright, you have a point.

Scott Benner 19:14
Who won this little battle. So we did stay with

Tess 19:17
him. He was he was older. He was in his like, 60s, I think. And so about a year and a half after this is interesting, he announced his retirement. He wanted to spend more time with his wife and kids, and we my son was pretty healthy, other than the diabetes, so we didn't have to see him a lot, but he was kind of interesting at the practice. He was didn't have the best bedside manner, but all my friends whose kids went to this practice. We called him the MacGyver of doctors, because he was the guy who could figure out the most obscure things, like he was really good at that stuff. I had a friend whose son was sick, and he figured out, I want to say, f pies. Have you heard of this f pies? Yeah, I. Gets like an allergy to the protein and meat. I don't know I I could be wrong every maybe you need to Google it. Scott, it was something strange, and he figured it out when, like no one else could, he couldn't figure out the his own disease that he had when it was staring him in the

Scott Benner 20:18
face. But maybe his blood sugar was low while I'm just looking at it. Well,

Tess 20:21
I figured if he was in his 60s, he was he had diabetes for over 50 years, so I can't imagine the, you know, the changes he saw over his lifetime.

Scott Benner 20:30
No, I see he saw a lot of changes. And now you would wonder, did he go with them or not? Because sometimes people don't.

Tess 20:36
He did show my son. Our first meeting with him was like a zoom call, I think, after the diagnosis, and because it was still COVID, and he did show my son, I think he had the tandem pump, okay, yeah. But after he announced his retirement, and two months later, he was in a single car accident and was killed, oh my god, yeah. And to this day I wonder, like, was it a blood sugar issue? You know? Horrible. Yeah, Jesus,

Scott Benner 21:05
I came out of nowhere. Jesus, right, if I told you what I was what thought I was pushing out of my head when you told me that poor man was killed in a car accident, I can't even tell you now because it's too inappropriate. I'm going to tell you when we're done recording. Remind me, hold on a second. I literally can't, because I don't know how other people's brains work, but while you're talking and pausing, my brain fills in what I think you're gonna say, and I start writing around that. But once in a while, like the humorous part of me fills in stupid instead, instead of like, conversation, thank you. No, that's lovely. Except you were, like, we were on a zoom call, and he was, he showed my son, he showed my son his and you kind of like, and I just kept thinking, Do you know what I was thinking? I'd let it go, like, oh my god, this really went off the rails, because that happened a lot during zoom. Guys were like, not sure their cameras were on. You know what? I mean? Oh, yeah. Also, what are guys doing while they're working? That's another story. There were one too many of those, like news stories

Tess 22:11
during COVID. Yeah, I heard a few after the first

Scott Benner 22:14
one came out. I was like, All right, now we're all being extra careful now, right? No, no. Okay. Anyway, I wasn't thinking that we'll move on. The poor man died in a car accident. That's horrible. Did you just tell me that to shock me, or does that advance the story somehow?

Tess 22:29
No, that was it like it was just, it was a wild diagnosis story, for sure. And that was, like the culminating event that was like, Wow. You know, he just retired to spend he had sent a letter to all his patients. You know, I'm gonna spend time with my more time with my wife and kids. And

Scott Benner 22:45
could happen so fast. I had a small accident recently while we were on vacation, of all things, and it was a split second, like, just nobody's fault, craziest, little weird thing, like, you know, it was, like, kind of a low speed accident. Nobody was hurt or anything like that. But as I've, I've as I've looked back over like, 1000 times in my head, I'm like, like, my god, like, that's it felt like I was like, walking, and I stepped off a cliff, like it came out of nowhere. And as it was happening, I'm like, Oh, it's too late now, whatever's gonna happen is gonna happen, and that's that, you know, so just really, I mean life, I don't wanna say life is fragile, but it is, and, like, the fragility of it is it shouldn't be lost. Like, I'm gonna go home and spend time, like, imagine he was able to retire in his early 60s. He was probably so excited.

Tess 23:38
Maybe he was older than that? Yeah, I don't know. I mean, 60s or 70s definitely had all white hair, but, um, yeah, it was sad. And I wanted to ask some of the other pediatricians there, but that was their co worker and colleague, and I didn't want to ask, what happened? Hey, like, what do you know? What? Okay. I mean, I found the article online, and I just know it was like a single vehicle. So it made me think, gosh, did it? Was it related to, like, a blood sugar or something? Somebody

Scott Benner 24:04
I work with passed away recently. There's part of you that's like, I wonder what happened. And then there's like, the common sense party is like, do not ask. It's none of your business. You know what I

Tess 24:13
mean, right? I'm always curious, though. I always want to know that the details like that,

Scott Benner 24:17
Tess, you're kind of a party. I can tell in the first 20 minutes here, I think you're I think you're the mom at the ball field who is a bit of a problem. Am I wrong? This episode of The Juicebox Podcast is sponsored by the ever since 365 get 365 days of comfortable wear without having to change a sensor. When you think of a continuous glucose monitor, you think of a CGM that lasts 10 or 14 days, but the ever since 365 it lives up to its name, lasting 365 days. That's one year without having to change your CGM with the ever since 365 you can count on comfort and. Inconsistency, 365, days a year, because the ever since, silicon based adhesive is designed for your skin to be gentle and to allow you to take the transmitter on and off, to enjoy your shower, a trip to the pool or an activity where you don't want your CGM on your body, if you're looking for comfort, accuracy, and a one year where you are looking for ever since 365 go to Eversense cgm.com/juicebox, to learn more. If you take insulin or so faucinyas, you are at risk for your blood sugar going too low. You need a safety net when it matters most, be ready with GE voc hypo pen. My daughter carries GE voc hypo pen everywhere she goes, because it's a ready to use rescue pen for treating very low blood sugar in people with diabetes ages two and above that. I trust low blood sugar emergencies can happen unexpectedly, and they demand quick action. Luckily, jivo kypo pen can be administered in two simple steps, even by yourself in certain situations. Show those around you where you store jivo kypo pen and how to use it. They need to know how to use jivo kypo pen before an emergency situation happens. Learn more about why GEVO kypo Pen is in Arden's diabetes toolkit at gvoke, glucagon.com/juicebox, gvoke shouldn't be used if you have a tumor in the gland on the top of your kidneys called a pheochromocytoma, or if you have a tumor in your pancreas called an insulin Oma. Visit gevoic glucagon.com/risk, for safety information. No,

Tess 26:43
not me. No, no, I'm on the straight and narrow. Okay,

Scott Benner 26:47
I think you have punch with you during late games, but your son's diagnosed. He was six at the time, right?

Tess 26:56
Okay, he was let out. He was diagnosed on Father's Day. My poor husband, I sent him off to the hospital on father's day, June 21 2020

Scott Benner 27:05
Wow, to go pick up your kid. Yep, to go and

Tess 27:08
and then my son turns seven, a little like a like, about two weeks later, did

Scott Benner 27:14
he have to stay by himself at times in the hospital because of COVID? Or were you able because somebody was with Arden? We were there for five days, and Kelly was always with her. And then, if not, it was me, but were you not able to do that?

Tess 27:28
Yeah, someone was with him at all times. But actually they wouldn't discharge him until they watched both parents, like, give him an injection. So I had to come to the hospital one day. You know, every time the the diabetes educators came in, I would have to get on Zoom, and my husband would get me on his phone and not zoom, but like FaceTime, and my husband would be and he'd like angle the phone at the diabetes educator so I could be in on the education. But I did have to go to the hospital the one day, and I remember, like the security guard at the bottom, like, you know, she could see, she was like, there's already an adult up there. And I said, Well, I have to be up there. And they're like, only one adult allowed, you know? And I had to explain, like, no, no, I like, I have to go up there because they have to watch me give my son an injection before they will discharge him. Yeah,

Scott Benner 28:19
I know this isn't your fault, but you're making this worse. Please, let me go upstairs, right? Yeah, those COVID rules were fun. Are you? Is your I was gonna say your glitchy nature, but I don't know where that came from exactly. Did it not allow you to help with the diabetes? This end up falling more to your husband? Oh,

Tess 28:37
no, I That's when I found you. I I'm gonna research. I'm gonna I dived in head first. Dove in, I should say. But I didn't love giving the the injections, so when my husband was home, I'd have him do that. I didn't change a Dexcom deck. I hated the noise that the g6 made, and so I did not change the Dexcom for probably the first year my husband did that, but it was COVID. So my son was home with us for an entire year like I didn't have to worry about, you know, sending him off to school, like we had an entire year where he never left us. Was that about to learn about it? Yes, absolutely. A silver lining for us of COVID Was he was with us for a year straight.

Scott Benner 29:20
For me, my silver lining of COVID was not going to restaurants save so much money. I was like, Oh, my God, how much are we spending at restaurants? Exactly, right. But no, I like that idea of not being rushed back to work and everybody kind of being able to be around and but do you have like, were you anxious before this? Yes,

Tess 29:40
like, on and off, it's not terrible, but when it comes to health and medical things, that's where I get

Scott Benner 29:48
pretty anxious about for you and your husband, or more about the kids. It

Tess 29:52
definitely got worse when I had kids. Yeah, I don't care as much about him or I, but you know, you have these little kids and, like, they're your life. Test.

Scott Benner 30:00
Why couldn't you just say I don't care that much about him, and then not say where I because it would have been hilarious.

Tess 30:05
I was just trying to be diplomatic. I don't

Scott Benner 30:07
really care about him. I mean, me a little more so. But um, have you stopped and thought, what if something happens in one of these other ones? I'm not gonna be able

Tess 30:17
to manage? I think now we could manage because we're four years in I have had it on my radar to do the trial net. I actually said something to my oldest, who's 15, almost 16, my daughter, and I said, you know, I think I want to get the rest of you tested. And she got very upset and said, I don't want to know. Oh, and I thought, Well, I see that side too. Would you want to know you're gonna eventually get some life altering disease. I don't know. I mean, I think

Scott Benner 30:44
we can make the argument that that doctor would have liked to have known if he was having an accident, right? Yeah, but she's old enough to decide. Also, I mean, I guess you could do the blood work and not tell her, that would be weird, yes, yeah. Also, if you want to know where I'm going to get notes from woke people there. It is going to be right there. It is my duty to let you know that children are autonomous. I'm like, I know. I'm just, I'm just telling you, the woman could get a blood test for her kid and not tell her the alchemist she wanted to. It's completely,

Tess 31:11
I was actually thinking of it, because she just had her like, 15 year well, visit, and they ordered just routine blood work. And I thought, well, contact, try on that and just say hey. And, you know, take a little more blood and send some of it off, or try on that some blood over,

Scott Benner 31:26
of course you did, because it's a thing you want to know. Is that, right? Yeah,

Tess 31:30
well, and I listened to some of your episodes about T Z, o, t Z, yes. And so that seemed very promising. I just don't love that it's an infusion right now, I keep thinking maybe it'll eventually be a pill or something easier for kids to take, but

Scott Benner 31:49
I just interviewed somebody who did it recently. They had nothing but good things to say about the process. But in fairness, they had to relocate to a hotel for like, 14 days, go in every day and get the infusion. Now the mom said, she said one of this episode's not out yet, but she said one of the Silver Linings for her was, she's like, my kid is older. I was never going to spend two weeks with him the way we did, like playing games and like hanging out and stuff. And she's like, it was kind of nice. So, you know, you can find a silver lining a lot of things, right? Right? But I have to tell you, if my I'm gonna sound like a hypocrite now, but if my 15 year old told me I don't want to know, I'd say, Okay, well, then we're not gonna look you wanna respect that? Yeah, as much as it's fun for me to play both sides of the of the coin when we're talking here, I would, I would respect what they said for sure.

Tess 32:37
The other side is like, if there's something out there that could delay the onset and eventually, could it? Could you keep getting the tea sealed and it will keep delaying it eventually, like that, you never get it. Like if I could do something to prevent another one of my children from getting this terrible disease, then you would, right? Yeah. So yeah, it's

Scott Benner 32:59
yeah, be a tough lesson to learn in hindsight, that's for sure, right? Exactly, especially if you're only 15. So then go back to my old argument of, what else would you let a 15 year old decide about, right? Yeah, nothing. Right, yeah. So what if you told the kid like, look, we'll test, and I promise not to tell you, you know the answer of the test. Of course, if there's nothing wrong, you'll never know. But that, even that doesn't make sense, because if there is something wrong, you are going to bring it up. So it's not like you're going to find out that they're, you know, in stage one, type one diabetes, and not say anything, right? Yeah, so her, her argument doesn't hold a lot of water, does it? No.

Tess 33:40
And then I thought, well, I should just take all of the all the other kids, like everyone has to go. I believe they will test parents as well, right? Of type one diabetics? Maybe, yeah, trial net. So I'm like, just make it a family affair, and everyone's got to go give blood for this. Also

Scott Benner 33:57
that new sponsor screen for type one. I think that if you go to screen for type one.org, is that what it is? Yeah, you think right now, they're like, Oh, good, real happy. We bought that ad from you. I'm like, Well, I'm like, I think it's this sorry screen for type one. Give me a second. That cracks me up for some reason. Let me find it real quickly. They're probably like, wow, money, well spent. This guy, this guy finally brings it up in a casual conversation. Can't remember the link. Yeah, I take their point if that's what they're thinking right now, screen for type one.com, there's links in the show notes to it, so you can learn more about it there. I agree with you, because if she's gonna get it, she's gonna get it. Now, what she's saying is, if I'm gonna get it when I'm 27 I don't want to know when I'm 15, right? Which I get? Yeah, what you're thinking is, if you're gonna get it next year, and we could do something about that, why don't we do that and make it take two years? Maybe you know something, right? She didn't like that argument. We

Tess 34:55
didn't really delve into that. She was, she kind of shut it down. I would. I would, I would want to know, yeah, I think for any of my kids. But again, I've been thinking about it for two years. I still haven't done it for any of them. Well,

Scott Benner 35:07
you went on the anti anxiety medication. Now, if you went off that, you'd get it done tomorrow, right? You're

Tess 35:12
onto something. Scott, what'd they give you there? Well, Bucha, no, I don't even know what it is. It's just a, I think it's an antidepressant

Scott Benner 35:20
test. The amount of people who say to me, Oh, I take a thing. I don't know what it's called, floors me. It really does, like, you really don't know what it's called.

Tess 35:27
It's a it's a law. It's hard for it to pronounce, slight syllable. Scott, yeah, come on. Did

Scott Benner 35:34
it have any other like effects that you didn't want, or did you just see a benefit from it? Nope.

Tess 35:40
I just noticed, like, if my son was having, like, a low blood sugar, I, like, I could feel my heart wanting to start racing, me wanting to get so worried. But, like, it couldn't, like, it was blocking that, like, flight or fight response.

Scott Benner 35:53
We didn't help. I mean, did you try anything else? No, no, that was the first thing you tried. Okay, yeah, that worked, huh? All right. Like, well, right on. I'm glad you found something that helps. There's times when Arden's like, alarm will go off overnight, and my wife is like, Arden is Arden, okay? And I'm like, wow, hold on, I'm not even awake yet. Let me figure it out. And then I'll look and I'll say, oh, you know what? It's just a compression low and, you know, don't worry about it. And, like, I go back to sleep in 15 minutes later. I'm like, what is that light? That light is Kelly on her phone because she can't go back to sleep. And I'm like, Hey, we already looked and she's good, go back to sleep. She goes, it's not that easy. And I'm like, oh, okay, so

Tess 36:30
I'm with Kelly, yeah, I'm gonna stay up and watch it, make sure it's a compression low for at least 20 minutes before I'm gonna go back to sleep. It

Scott Benner 36:38
ruins the next two hours for her. She's just like, she's like, my heart, my heart is pounding, so I feel her, yeah, I think it's that thing, like, whatever happens the first time the kid comes out of the hoo ha whole like, it definitely throws you guys off. Yeah, it does, really. It turns everything into, like, high intensity that keep the baby alive. Like, guys have it too, but we like it comes and goes. You know what? I mean?

Tess 37:03
Yes, yeah, yeah, my husband's much more calm with that type of stuff. I'm the one. If there's something small, I immediately think it's big. And he's like, No, it's not a big deal now. Now, when my son was diagnosed, he was still saying the day I was packing him off to the hospital. He was saying, I think it's just a stomach bug. And I said, No, we're

Scott Benner 37:24
also boys, so you can't He probably just like fell. So, right? Listen, I have that thing. Somebody last last night, I did a late night ask me anything in the Facebook group. You guys should all be in the private Facebook group if

Tess 37:39
you're not. I saw that, right? I was gonna write to you and say, Are you gonna make me nervous tomorrow when I record with you? That's not

Scott Benner 37:45
my fault. That's you. Oh, we already figured that out earlier. And so what did somebody say to me? They asked me, I forget what they asked me, but I ended up admitting if I let people down, it really bothers me. An example that would be like, kind of commiserate to how you or Kelly might feel in the situations you're describing. It's gonna sound silly, but Arden was leaving for college last week on Friday, and we had tickets Thursday night to see, like, the 15th anniversary showing of Coraline in the movie theater, which is, like my wife's favorite movie. And it was gonna be me and Arden and Kelly and one of Arden's friends. Why did Cole not go? I shouldn't say here, because he's an adult, but he saw it when he was young, and it scared the hell out of him, and he still doesn't want to see the freaking movie. So he's like, No, thank you. And I'm like, Okay. I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know, you're 24 now. And he goes, I don't care. I don't want to see this movie. So it's like one of those phantom events, things like, you know, like, it's not really through the movie theater, it's like a third party that sets it up. I bought these tickets months ago for Kelly, like, I saw that they were on sale. I bought them right away, and I knew she'd be super excited. And then it ended up being like, this weird thing where now we have to go the night before Arden's leaving for college, like, it just landed on a bad day, but whatever. And earlier in the day, Kelly's like, hey, what time's that showing again? I said, Oh, it's 730 I pulled out my phone. It's right there in my calendar. I touch the calendar thing, it launches the email shows the code. I'm like, Ah, I'm all set. This is perfect. We get to the theater, and I go back into my calendar, and I touch the link, and it launches the email, and the email won't open, and now I can't scan it to get in. So I'm outside, I'm calling my son. I'm like, Hey, can you go on my computer? Like, that's not working. The woman at the front's like, if you don't have this email, you can't come in. I'm like, but I have the reference number. She just doesn't matter. So I'm outside, I'm on the phone, and my daughter's friend, who I've known for since she was a little girl, like she picked a flower off a bush and she like, touched it to my neck. And Arden said, I thought you were gonna punch her like she came up behind me and touched me. She's like you reacted so harshly, and then I looked at you, and she goes, Dad, you. Face was purple, and I was like, was it? And she goes, dude, you looked like you could have run through a wall. And I And she's like, why were you so upset? I said I wasn't upset. And she goes, No, you were really, really upset. And I said I wasn't upset. I was sad. And she goes, what I said, I felt like I let everybody down. And she goes to go to a movie, and I'm like, Yeah, I probably have problems, but I felt like I let everyone down. And I I knew I could get us into that theater, but my wife was standing there and looking at me, and I knew I had to deal with it the way she wanted me to deal with it, because the woman at the front said, you can't get in without that email. And my wife's like a rule follower. So now that's the new rule we're doing. And I would have just gone and found the manager and been like, Listen, man, we bought these four seats. I have them right here in my calendar. We'll go sit in them. If somebody else shows up, just sit on them. Fair enough. I'll get up. But that's not going to happen, because I bought these seats. I would have talked my way into that in three seconds, right? So anyway, so I pulled myself like, I felt myself overreact to being touched on the neck. And I was like, Oh my God. Like, you're not okay. Like, so I, like, kind of took a deep breath. I went back to the woman at the front. I was like, Look, I have this reservation number. And she goes, Well, I can't get you into that. I was like, well, can someone else? And she goes, Oh yeah, probably the manager. I was like, Oh, do you think I could speak to him, please? So anyway, he gets us into 20 seconds with the, you know, the number, and as we're standing there waiting, somebody's in the bathroom, Arden goes, you okay? And I was like, Yeah, I'm absolutely fine. I know you think I'm upset, but I'm not. I'm not upset. I'm not angry. I was just, I just, I felt like I let everybody down. And she's like, No man, we're good. And I was like, okay, she goes, you know, we could have just bought four more seats and gone in. It wasn't sold out. Anyway, I don't that's the closest I can come to understanding what you're talking about, yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, it's a long story that ends with people listening, going, Oh, wow, his parents did get divorced. I really do think it's like a I think it's a side effect of that, to be perfectly honest, yeah, yeah. But nevertheless, at least, you know, I'm not going to let you down if I'm with

Tess 42:22
you. I know Scott, you probably don't remember this. This was something else I wanted to mention. But a year after my son was diagnosed, we were at the beach again, and it was late. He his blood sugar. He was in the 40s, and we had pumped him full of so much sugar, and he was like, physically sick. Could not eat any more sugar. And I appealed in your Facebook group. Just what do I do my son, you know, he won't even take any more sugar. And I get message from you from Juicebox Podcast, and it just has this long number, and I write back, and I say phone number question mark, and I said, I'm on the East Coast too. Like you, Scott. I know it's late. It was like, two in the morning. I was like, did you want me to call you tomorrow? And you wrote now,

Scott Benner 43:08
oh, that was I do. Go ahead. Keep telling the story, yeah, because I think I come off like a hero in this Go ahead. Go ahead. Yeah,

Tess 43:15
like, 2am and and I was like, oh my god, Scott. Scott Benner wants me to call him. And I had gotten my by now, like, my son's asleep, his blood sugar was, like, steady, at least in like, the high 50s. And I was like, Oh my God, you let me call you and help me walk through it. And I remember joking. We were joking, if my husband came out, he'd be like, Who are you talking to? And I would have to say Scott from Juicebox. And it sounds like that's Jake from State Farm,

Scott Benner 43:45
exactly. It's that State Farm commercial, like, Who are you talking, right? And my husband say,

Tess 43:50
well, he sounds hideous. I don't know if you remember that commercial, but it was so funny. I remember

Scott Benner 43:55
very I guess, too well, actually. And why did they get away from that? Just to give Patrick my homes all that money, I guess. But it was a great commercial. Hey, I don't want to die. I don't want to go too far into the State Farm commercial thing. But I was personally embarrassed for Andy Reid when they made him say nuggies in a State Farm commercial. I just want to say that that was horrible. I agree. Anyway, we're on the phone. What did I did I say anything helpful? Or did I just act like a sounding board so you could relax.

Tess 44:22
You were like a sounding board by then, and like his blood sugar. And you were like, Well, what did he eat? And I was like, wow, you know, or at the beach, he had pizza and I went for ice cream. And you were like, you don't go on vacation anymore. That just messes everything.

Scott Benner 44:37
Rock solid information for me,

Tess 44:39
right? But no, I think, you know, it was just all the physical activity, like on the beach and stuff, was just we needed to way adjust his, you know, his car ratio and and things.

Scott Benner 44:51
You don't realize that the first time, you know, like, you're seeing all that food, and you're like, I'm gonna, I know how to Bolus for this. I'm gonna do it. And. Don't take into account the running around and the heat and the swimming and that late and low thing that happens at two o'clock in the morning for some reason, and you know, all that other stuff, you figure it out that. Mean, have you figured it out now you go to the beach now without trouble? Yeah.

Tess 45:14
But you know, he my son, he's always been very sensitive to insulin, so it just, I just still don't feel like we have a, like, tight control, like it's just, it's so unpredictable with him. He's a he's a big athlete. He plays travel baseball and travel ice hockey with his sports and activities. He's a very active kid. It just affects his insulin needs, but it's just so unpredictable. So, you know, I hear a lot of your guests, and after they've been listening to you, you know, their a one, Cs are awesome in the fives or sixes, and like, we cannot get him, he's right around seven. And I cannot one one time about a year ago, dropped to 6.9 but I just, I want better for him.

Scott Benner 45:57
What's the management style that you use,

Tess 46:00
he's on the Omnipod five, and that that has helped a lot. He was on the arrows at first, where it wasn't talking to the Dexcom, and we struggled a lot. Still, the Omnipod five has helped, but it doesn't seem to be able to keep up with his highs and his lows as well as we'd like. And it's interesting, when we talk to his pediatric endocrinologist, we actually see an NP who is in the diabetes clinic there at the big hospital. And she's always like, no, he's doing great. And I'm always like, I don't think I mean, he's doing good enough. And I imagine she sees so many kids who probably are doing a lot worse. So in the grand scheme of things, for her, he's doing pretty well. But

Scott Benner 46:48
yeah, he's doing well the Juicebox world.

Tess 46:50
I feel like we can do better, like so many,

Scott Benner 46:55
in a common sense world, like I think you're right too, because I listen, I just interviewed a woman the other day. She's an adult now, but she said from 13 to like 26 she was in double digit, a one CS, and for a couple years, had a 14, right? And if you're the doctor who sees that a lot, every day, you see a seven, and you're like, lady, I don't know what your business perfect, you know? And I get that perspective, but you're saying, you know, is there a way for you to help me get just into the sixes, even, like, so I would ask you, what do you think is happening? Is it excursions at meals? Is it highs two or three hours after he eats? Is he getting low and then you're correcting, and then it's popping up or like, where do you think you're like, where you want to trim from when you think of that a one say he tends

Tess 47:45
to go high at night, and the pump can't seem to like, bring him down. And we've adjusted, you know, he has practice between all his sports almost every night of the week. So he eats like a meal, you know, before practice. But when he gets home at eight or nine at night, he's eating again, yeah, but the highs happen hours after eating, which makes you think, Oh, is it a basal thing? But that's not something you really adjust on the five you should it should be adjusting. It

Scott Benner 48:12
makes me think that if he's eating late at night, then he goes to bed, your digestion slows down. That food sits in his stomach longer, and it's pushing his blood sugar up. That's what it makes me think. That

Tess 48:22
makes think. That makes sense because, because if we give him all of it, like up front, usually it's low, he will go low, and then he treats and then he goes to sleep and goes high. So wonder if we should, like, maybe how high between 202

Scott Benner 48:37
50, and how much insulin would fix it. That's the thing.

Tess 48:42
It's so unpredictable. One day one unit brings them down 150 and the next time it won't touch it. Does that have

Scott Benner 48:51
anything to do? Do you think with the density or the fat content of the food he's eating? Do you see what I'm saying? Like, if one day a unit works and one day units too much. Is that the difference between a cheeseburger after practice and a ham sandwich after practice, you know what I mean, like, like, is it just a grease and protein thing? Maybe I don't think so. We're,

Tess 49:14
you know, we, we tend to take that into account when we're dosing him. What

Scott Benner 49:19
about activity at practice? Is there any way to track if, if, like, are you talking about baseball or hockey right now both

Tess 49:25
he Yeah, he both is going on right now. Yeah, it's fall season for travel baseball and hockey season just lasts forever.

Scott Benner 49:31
How tall is he? He's short. Oh, I'm gonna try that hard. A lot of it's about how tall you are once you get to college. So don't tell him that now to crush him. But if I told my kid that when he was your son's age, he would have been like, it doesn't matter. And I would have been like, oh, but it's going to my first thought was, why don't you try to do I know it's on the pod five, so you can't do an extended Bolus, but why don't you do like a two Bolus thing, like Bolus enough to stop a spike when he eats that late night meal? Go and then wait 90 minutes and Bolus the rest of it and see if you can get ahead of that latent high. That's that's sticky with a with that. I mean, that might work. Yeah, yeah. We can try that. Yeah. I think you just have to spread the insulin out a little bit. Because, you know, with the algorithm, you tell it, it's 30 carbs. It goes in. The algorithm doesn't think, Oh, two hours from now, if you have like, a fat or protein rise, I'm gonna, like, treat that like it's just gonna, it's gonna do what it does, right? It's, it does this. This micro Bolus is the but they call it non, they pod five, right? There's those little micro boluses. And, I mean, really, that's really just a pushing up of the basal, which is not going to cut into, like, a significant impact. If there is one there

Tess 50:45
exactly, I find myself overriding the pump a lot and needing to give, like, a big Bolus, but like that defeats the purpose, like we should be able to get it.

Scott Benner 50:55
Yeah, now you're awake, so maybe, maybe that's it, like, spread the carbs out over a longer timeline. Maybe that'll help it. Yeah, we'll try that with the shot. Also, if anyone's listening, I don't know if that's actually gonna work or not. I'm just saying, like, it's what I think it's what I would do if I was in your situation. Yeah, thanks. We'll try that. Yeah, why not? Right? Did your husband just make all these kids to try to get one of them to play a college sport? Is that? What's really going

Tess 51:21
on here? Maybe but the amount of money we're shelling out, all four of my kids play two travel sports a piece, so the amount of money we're shelling out, I think, is going to end up being the equivalent of the cost of college. Holy

Scott Benner 51:32
hell. What do you guys have, like an AI startup over there? You're making a bunch of money. What's going on? No

Tess 51:38
report. So I had to borrow my neighbors these Apple headphones somewhere, and had to borrow them from my from my

Scott Benner 51:43
name. They don't know that you said that before we started recording. That's right, yeah, I will tell you my my son said to us once in college, like, because he got a fair amount of money in college, right? And he's like, and I saved this much money going to college because I played baseball. And I was like, Dude, you don't think we spent that money when you were like, younger, like, what do you think a trip to like, you know, Florida costs, you know, what do you think? What do you think? Like, travel ball costs like, I remember travel balls being like, $3,000 a season. And, yeah, I'm sure it's

Tess 52:16
qualified for a tournament in Canada.

Scott Benner 52:19
Oh, last year we can't come. That's what you would have heard from me. We're busy. To

Tess 52:23
Canada. Where'd you go? Sarnia, right up past Detroit.

Scott Benner 52:29
I feel like you're making that up. Isn't that a book where people live in a closet? Narnia, oh, that's probably the same thing. Yeah. No, I would have been like, we're busy that day. Sorry, I can't do that. I eventually figured out, and I would say this to anybody that's listening, the right travel team for your kid is one where they play, and it's not expensive. It doesn't need to be expensive. They just need to play. And you know, if you're on a great team and you're only playing half the innings or you're not a starter, it's, you'd rather be on a half ass team and play every day. It's about playing more.

Tess 53:06
So, right? Yeah, and I think just keeping them busy, they're busy with sports, they're hopefully less likely to get into meth trouble or other things.

Scott Benner 53:15
Yes, by the way, I bring that up because I was interviewing a woman the other day who was describing her life, her hell scape. I think it's it's out now. And she says, you know, at some point her parents get divorced. Her sister was, like, four years older than her, so she went to her sister for advice, who didn't live at home anymore. And you know what, her sister gave her meth. I was like, Oh, okay. Sometimes I think I said it to her. I was like, do you hear how crazy this is? Because I think sometimes people are in situations they don't even they don't hear it anymore, you know, right? It's so funny. Like, I loved the time that my kids played sports, and they they loved it too, and when they stopped loving it, we didn't like when Arden was like, I don't want to play anymore. We're like, Well, fine, don't you know? Like, I my feelings weren't hurt or anything like that. It's absolutely fine. There's no way to know at this age what it feels like when it ends and it just it ends so abruptly. It's horrifying, like you won't be ready for it.

Tess 54:15
No, that's why you keep having more and then always be another one in sports.

Scott Benner 54:20
What a plan pass. I didn't think of it that way. If I just made 17 kids, I'd always be at a baseball game, right? Have I ever talked on the podcast about my son's last college game? Not that I remember, oh my god, he came up the bat in like, the seventh inning of a double header, and he was hitting well in the game, and you could see him, like, you know, how baseball works, like, first he got it, you know, he walked, and then he's, like, in a single, like, you could feel it coming, you know, and in the seventh inning, and he leads off the inning, and it's college baseball. I'm talking about, like, dead center. It's 400 feet dead center, like, right? Like, it's a, you're. You're playing in a professional size baseball stadium. And first pitch, he hit that ball dead center, and the and the kid in center field caught it with his back up against the wall and his hand up in the air, like he just he missed, he missed the lead off first pitch, home run by three feet. It was such a good ball. And I remember thinking, man, his next at bat. I can't wait to see his next at bat. And then they lost that game, so the second game of the double header was inconsequential. So the coach sat the starters and let everybody else play. Oh, that's tough. And I sat there like thinking, like the wait that was it, like, it's over, you know? Like, he was just like, right? He just like, he's so close, like, today, and like, he just needs one more, like, one more at bat. He's gonna, he's gonna go crazy. And as I'm feeling that, and then I'm like, oh my god, it's not over today. It's over, over like, there's no next week, there's no next year. There's no reason to, like, we could throw his baseball glove away right now. That kind of over, oh, that's so sad. Oh, Tess it. That's not the sad part. The sad part is that when I looked for him, like, once, I gathered myself, like to make eye contact with him to see if he was okay. I couldn't find him. He wasn't in the dugout, he wasn't on the field. It was in between games. He had probably just heard he wasn't playing in the second game. And I couldn't visual I couldn't locate him, and so I started walking around, and he was maybe 75 yards from the field, sitting in a piece of grass by himself, like, just sitting there. That's heartbreaking. And he's like, grown now, you know what I mean? Like, he's six, six feet tall, he's 210, pounds, like he's a he's a grown ass man, like, and he's sitting there like he's four, and he couldn't find us in the mall, you know, and, oh, you're gonna

Tess 57:01
make me cry, Scott, that that's so sad. I have the image in my head.

Scott Benner 57:05
Oh, you should have it's that exact image. So now I'm looking at him, I'm 75 yards from him, and I'm going, I should go hug him, and then I'm like, I should leave him alone. And I didn't know what to do. And so would you do? I got out of his eye line, and I just watched him to make sure he was okay. Oh, and then I cried a little bit, and I wondered if he was crying, but he was too far away for me to know he wasn't. By the way, I know him better now i don't i He might not cry if he got shot, which is so weird because I'm crying now. Yeah, I'm close. And so he sat there 20 minutes, and then he just stood up and, like, kind of straightened up his uniform and fixed his hat and went back and sat in the dugout for the second game. Wow. And I was like, and I sat there and I watched that second game, but it was just the it was the craziest thing. So then we have to leave him like he's in college, like he's not coming home with us. So he went back to school. We went home, and I woke up incredibly early the next morning. I got my car and I drove and I don't know where I was going, but I ended up at his little league baseball field, and I sat in the stands and cried like a baby for like 20 minutes, and then I pulled myself together and got my car and left. And I have never been back to that field. Well, that's a lie. They asked me to come back and announce a game last year. I did it for the girls, but it was the first time I had been back there in years. I came home, I couldn't go inside, so I just started, like, pulling weeds outside, like, just doing the most random things outdoors. And my wife came out, and I couldn't make eye contact with her. I was just like, don't like, I can't like, not now, like, I just can't. So I was just really, and it's because you do this thing over and over again year after year, it feels like your life, right? No, it is, yeah. A couple years later, I don't think about it anymore. It's really interesting. Wow, I just all

Tess 59:07
four of mine play, um, oh, the girls play softball, and the boys play baseball. So we are at the ball fields constantly.

Scott Benner 59:14
Yeah, no, I have, like, freckles on my cheeks from sun like that I didn't have when I was younger. You know, like, it's I spent a lot of my life standing there, sitting there, walking back and forth from driving to I have one thing, like, on my desktop, I have the video of his last home run in college. Every once in a while, I'll just, like, click on it, let it run for 20 seconds, and then I just shut off. And that's it. I probably shouldn't. He should never know I do that. But

Tess 59:47
does he listen? I

Scott Benner 59:49
can't imagine. And he'll never know. My wife doesn't. I'm like, I'm like, did you hear that thing today? She goes where I'm like, on the pocket. She goes, I listen to your podcast. And I go, Okay, I. She's like, I get enough of you here. I was like, All right, what have we not talked about that we should have? I think that's about it. Yeah, yeah. How close are you to me? Close,

Tess 1:00:11
yeah, like, outside, outside of Baltimore. Oh, okay, yeah. In fact, we're in New Jersey all the time for baseball tournaments. You guys have a lot of baseball up there. We

Scott Benner 1:00:23
do. I tell I'll tell people a secret. During COVID. New Jersey ran college baseball for like, basically disenfranchised college players, because everybody got sent home. And oh, my son later told me he goes that summer. I played during COVID. He goes college, not college, anywhere else he goes. That's the base best baseball I ever played. And he didn't mean him, he meant the competition. Because what happened was, is all the players got sent home from college, but the kids who were really good didn't stop playing, and they all got together in this one league, and it was legit, like my son played on a team that year where he was in the outfield with three center fielders, one from Penn, one from Duke, one from his school, one from the next school. Like their starting pitcher was like, I think from North Carolina. They had a kid that was throwing for Duke out of the pen, like they were a d1 baseball team. They were crazy. It was like an all star team, and then you show up and play another all star team. It

Tess 1:01:27
was awesome. Wow, yeah, yeah, there's some great facilities up by you, for sure. It was the

Scott Benner 1:01:31
best baseball I ever saw, too, and everybody got better. It was pretty awesome. But he actually remarked he went back to college, and he was like, this is not nearly as good as that. Basically thrown together league I played in in um, during COVID. So, wow, it was weird. We all sat very far from each other. Even though we were outside, we didn't realize at that point that being outside kind of fixed it so. But anyway, this is really cool. What are your other kids play? Three of mine play ice hockey, which so expensive, isn't it? Yeah,

Tess 1:02:05
although my one daughter, who the only one who doesn't play ice hockey, found the sport that turns out to be more expensive than ice hockey. What is it? It is competitive, hip hop dance. What the hell

Scott Benner 1:02:21
not real. Is that real? It's real.

Tess 1:02:23
She doesn't like the other styles of dance, but she's really good at hip hop, which is funny, because my husband, I have no rhythm at all, not sure where she came from, but

Scott Benner 1:02:33
that's awesome. She's good at it travel. Why? What makes that expensive?

Tess 1:02:39
Choreography fees, costume fees, the traveling on the weekend, the competition, competition fees, the monthly fee of going to the classes, you know, four hours of class each week. Wow, it's pretty amazing. Older, congratulations, she did it.

Scott Benner 1:02:56
Yay. Is that a thing she can get into college for? I don't

Tess 1:02:59
know. I don't know much. We're two years into the dance world. It's a new world for me. Yeah, do

Scott Benner 1:03:05
you think any of your kids will play in college? Have you noticed it on them, like the 15 year olds, old enough that you could smell it on them a little bit now, right?

Tess 1:03:13
She she's a really good softball player. She plays ice hockey. I'm not sure about college. I don't know that she even wants to my, my 11 year old son, the type one diabetic. He's a really strong athlete, but he has not hit his growth spurt yet. So I'm hoping you know he's smaller. So he's got kids on his baseball team that have 3040, pounds on him, and they can, they could crush the ball. I mean, he for his size, he can hit, yeah, I'm waiting for him to get, get go through puberty, so that I can see what, we can see what he really does. Do you

Scott Benner 1:03:45
have his thyroid tested? Yeah, they test that, actually, I wrote it down. They test that, like once a year. They do blood work on them once a year. What's this? TSH, is that, is that? What would say, thyroid? Yeah, I don't give access to oh two, yeah, it's good. He's good. Yeah. I only asked because when Arden's thyroid was managed, well, she got I've said this before, but Arden was probably the smallest person in her school, and now she's five seven, wow, yeah, but that all came after her thyroid medication.

Tess 1:04:17
I wonder if kids like, if my son, I don't know how to explain it. Like, was his growth stunted, or his like, when he went undiagnosed for who knows how long, and now he's just behind, but eventually, like, maybe he'll catch up.

Scott Benner 1:04:31
Yeah, I don't know. Like, I don't know like, if art and his thyroid was always an issue and we just finally figured it out, or if it was an issue around the time she was going to grow, and then it kind of slowed her down. And then when we got it straight, she, you know, picked speed up speed again. I don't know,

Tess 1:04:48
yeah, although my husband, he's like, six three now, but he was always the shortest in his class, he said, through middle school, and then he grew like, three or four inches, like in one summer. But. Before he started his freshman year of high school. So maybe my son will just be later like him, yeah, but my other son's taller. He's almost as tall as my the eight year old's almost as tall as the 11 year

Scott Benner 1:05:10
old. How tall are you? I'm 43 Wait, you're 43 Yeah. How tall are you? Five, four on a good day. Okay? Because you I said, How tall are you? And you told me you were 43 and I was like, I don't understand. Is that metric? She went to Canada one time, and she's using the metric system now. I thought you said, How old are you? No, I recognize like, why is doing how old I am? I just want to say this. I had to drive through Baltimore two weekends ago during that horrible rainstorm, and I almost died. I'm not even kidding. We had to go get Arden stuff. I'll leave you with this. This seems to be a story episode, so I don't know if I said this on the podcast directly or not. Arden is not going to the Savannah College of Art and Design anymore, and so she came home after her sophomore year, and she said there are a number of reasons why, but I do not want to go back there at the top of her list were very poor teaching. That was her biggest complaint. She went into one of her core classes this year, and on the first day, the teacher said, I've never taught this before. I've never done it professionally. If you have questions, do not ask me. And then gave them a YouTube blank. So that didn't go well for her and many other people. And even though she ended up with a good grade, and like, figured her way through the grade, she did not, she doesn't have the skill. And she said, if I go back there without that skill, I will tumble behind very quickly. And she's like, and this is not like, an isolated problem. This one teacher, this place, is like, I've never seen something go downhill as quickly as I've seen this. I'm gonna leave. I'm gonna go back to my other option coming out of high school, and she's now, at the moment, like, signed up as a psychology major, but she's looking very closely at pre law and being an attorney someday. Okay, so she's off at a university doing that now, but she made that decision after she came home from Savannah, and her stuff was still in Savannah, so we hustled around. She got accepted to a couple of schools. We figured out which one that she wanted to go to, got her all set up in a very short amount of time over the summer, this was not easy, and then my father in law got sick and passed away right as we were going on our first family vacation in six years. And we had two weeks during that time to retrieve art and stuff out of her place where they were going to trash it, because we only had the place to a certain day. So we went on the vacation, buried my father in law came home, Arden got sick. She got strep throat. We doctored her up as best as we could, and then she and I drove down to Savannah and got her stuff. We drove Savannah and back, 1400 miles in about 48 hours. And so, gosh, and then we got home, and then we had four days to take her to the next school. So we're coming home from Savannah after all this, pretty exhausted, and though the skies just open up and we're about through DC, which is the worst, yep, you know, but, but we're, we're, we're in that gap there. We're coming up in the Baltimore DC thing. And as we're going through Baltimore and all that construction, you just can't see. And so I'm in the left lane at times. I One way I drove was there were light poles overhead on the left side. I think I was in like, the express lane, yes, and I couldn't see the curb or the or the lines or anything on the left like so I just, I lined the corner of my car up with the lights over my head, and I kept them on the corner of the car. And there was a ton of pressure, because Arden was behind me in a different car, driving. Oh, it's so, like, scary. She's just like, I crashed. She's following me because she doesn't know what. She can't see shit either, right? This goes on for hours, and then it finally stops, or it slows down enough and we're like, oh my god, I can't believe we're alive. Like, we stopped and, like, regrouped, and we were like, I can't believe we didn't crash. We were doing like, putting down our sun visors to limit our field of view so our eyes wouldn't get distracted by the rain, as much like we were using all these little like, internet tricks, staring at the road like it was really insane. Wow. And we drove about an hour or so, and it was all good. Then we got to the Delaware, which is that Delaware Memorial Bridge maybe, yeah, yep, and it's just crystal clear, as we're like, two miles off the bridge. And I called her, and I was like, hey, looks good. Like, let's speed back up and get home, because it was getting late, you know, I swear to God, as I hung up the phone, the sky opened up again, and by the time we were on the bridge, there was air. The wind was blowing. Everything was going sideways. The cars were getting pushed. We were going 15 miles an hour. There were standing. Water. People were giving up and pulling over. You could not see anything going over the bridge. But I called her, and I was like, Do you want to stop? And she goes, just keep going. Then I was like, Okay. I said, Can you see anything? She goes, I can see you. And I was like, Oh, great. So this is on me. And so, like, so we're going over the bridge. And she goes, whoa. And I'm like, what? She goes, I thought the car was gonna blow off the bridge. I was like, Okay, great. This went on for like, 45 minutes. It was insane. And you could, you couldn't see but just as I said to her the second time, I'm like, there's an exit coming up, like we got over the bridge. I'm like, do you want to get off the road? And she goes, I don't think this is ever going to stop. I think we should keep going. So we kept crawling along and crawling along. And then it just it ended. It was just over. And I called her back and I said, Is this gonna sound counterintuitive how I usually talk to you? I'm like, But drive as fast as you can. I was like, because I said, this is on our it's to the west of us. And I was like, and I think we have to beat it, or this is going to happen again. I actually think we're better off driving insanely fast than letting this rain get to us again. So then we raced the rain for like, the last hour back through New Jersey. It was really crazy. Sounds like a fun trip? It wasn't. I thought I literally, like, it was the first time in a while. I was like, Oh, this is it. This is I'm gonna die, and it's gonna be my fault that art and follows me right along into a concrete wall or something like that. Anyway, people are like, you could have pulled over. I was like, yeah, maybe Tess, thank you. I appreciate it. I like that you shared your story. I'm glad you found something that helps you. I didn't ask you if the podcast helped you with the kid, but it sounds like it did. So I didn't want to sound like a, you know, like I was like, fishing for a compliment. No,

Tess 1:11:43
it definitely did

Scott Benner 1:11:44
good. I'm glad. Can you say for like, was it bold beginnings? Was it Pro Tip series? Was it just hearing conversations like, quickly? What was the best for you?

Tess 1:11:55
Definitely the the bold beginnings and the Pro Tip series, just in the very beginning, just learning it all and just being like, No, I'm not going to be okay with a $300 I mean, 300 300 blood sugar. You know, Scott says if the blood sugar is high, it means you need more insulin. You know, we were given the typical, you know, don't give any corrections. You might stack the insulin. And it was time to just say, No, we're gonna I know enough now to take matters into my own hands, from what I learned from the podcast, to try and get a little bit better. You know, control over his diabetes,

Scott Benner 1:12:31
that really is the big deal is having the confidence to make adjustments, right? I think, like I think, that when it boils down to it, once you have the confidence to make adjustments, whether it's the settings or to blood sugars, that's kind of the beginning of your path of you know, like getting there. I'm glad it helped. I really am. Okay. Well, thank you so much. Can you hold on for one second? For me, Sure, thank you.

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#1382 Meditations

Brian's journey with his son's diagnosis, family reactions, & personal growth through therapy.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
We are all together again friends for this next episode of The Juicebox podcast.

Brian is the father of a young child with type one diabetes who was diagnosed a few years ago, around Thanksgiving, he was anxious in the beginning of the diagnosis, and so Brian sought out therapy, which was helpful for him. We're going to talk about that and much more. Nothing you hear on the Juicebox podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your health care plan. Don't forget, if you're a US resident who has type one or is the caregiver of someone with type one, visit T 1d exchange.org/juicebox right now and complete that survey. It will take you 10 minutes to complete the survey, and that effort alone will help to move type one diabetes research forward. It will cost you nothing to help. The holidays are coming up fast. Head to cozy earth.com. Use the offer code juice box at checkout to save 40% off of everything they sell. Cozy earth.com. Use the offer code juice box to save 40% this holiday season. If you're newly diagnosed. Check out the bold beginnings series. Find it at Juicebox podcast.com. Up in the menu in the feature tab of the private Facebook group, or go into the audio app you're listening in right now and search for Juicebox podcast. Bold beginnings, I'm having an on body vibe alert. This episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by ever since 365 the only one year where CGM, that's one insertion and one CGM a year, one CGM one year, not every 10 or 14 days ever since cgm.com/juicebox. Having an easy to use an accurate blood glucose meter is just one click away. Contour, next.com/juicebox That's right, today's episode is sponsored by the contour. Next Gen blood glucose meter. Your kids mean everything to you, and you do anything for them, especially if they're at risk. So when it comes to type one diabetes screen, it like you mean it, because if even just one person in your family has type one, your child is up to 15 times more likely to get it. But just one blood test can help you spot it early. So don't wait. Talk to your doctor about screening tap now or visit screen for type one.com to get more info and screen it like you mean it. Hi,

Brian 2:40
Scott. Name is Brian. I'm glad to be here speaking with you today after listening to you for what seems like hours on end every day for a long time. So glad we finally meet. Oh, it's

Scott Benner 2:50
very nice to meet you, too, Brian. What's a long time? How long have you been listening you?

Speaker 1 2:54
Actually, you might find this a little humorous. So two thanksgiving to go is when my son was diagnosed. I got a little packet that included, actually, to your Arden's day blog. And I remember looking at that blog saying, What am I going to learn from a guy who stopped blogging 10 years ago or, you know, it was some outdated looking site that they sent me to right and by January, though, about a month and a half later, I actually found your podcast. I'm like, Oh, this is where you moved to and I basically been listening almost every day since, starting from the beginning. So it's been over a year listening almost every day. It's helped me get through a lot. So appreciate what you do.

Scott Benner 3:32
That's lovely. I'm also thinking that the Arden's day.com forward slash, blog doesn't exist. Hold on a second. What did you find

Speaker 1 3:40
it was, it was a printout. It thing was ancient looking. It had, I just remember, like, what was it? Yeah, they sent me to the blog, and I was like, I don't, this doesn't look like it's been updated in a while

Scott Benner 3:51
because, because martinsday.com forwards to Juicebox podcast.com

Speaker 1 3:56
Yeah, I don't like I said it was, it was a picture of you, and that listed the blog, and I remember typing in what it was so well it was almost I literally said to myself, What am I going to learn from this guy? He stopped talking about his, you know, anecdotes and how to work his way through things, you know, a while ago. And I was like, I guess he gave up, but you didn't. You just moved medium. So glad I found it regardless.

Scott Benner 4:17
I loved blogging, but this is what that is without all the typing and editing. But it's much better.

Speaker 1 4:23
I agree, yeah, much easier to consume. You can do two things at once while listening.

Scott Benner 4:28
You have type one of your child. I'm sorry, yeah, no, it's

Speaker 1 4:32
a great question. It's my son. He's 10. He was diagnosed when he was just after he turned eight.

Scott Benner 4:37
Was this literally on Thanksgiving or around myself.

Speaker 1 4:40
I guess diagnosis story is as good as any, right. My family came to town from a couple different states for Thanksgiving. I used to love hosting Thanksgiving. It's a bit of a traumatic process. Now, I'm sure it's still something we have to figure out how to work around. But the family come to town and my. A one of my in laws. My brother in law actually has type two and type two that's not particularly well controlled, would be something of an understatement. Hi

Scott Benner 5:08
to him, by the way, go ahead. Yeah, no. And he's, he's

Speaker 1 5:11
so well meaning. He's so great. But you know, there's definitely some denial about, you know, how he has to manage. So they were down for Thanksgiving, and my experience with with him is actually what tipped me off to my son's diagnosis. So he he drove down from where he was coming from, couple hours away. He ended up crashing the car. It sounds terrible, but it was like in trying to get into a parking lot, like, clip the curb and so you're going to disable the vehicle, okay? But he called us at like, 2am the day before Thanksgiving, like, Jimmy, like, Where'd you go? And he's like, Oh, I'm here. So I went picked him up, and I pick him up, and he's just like, chugging water and juice the whole time.

Scott Benner 5:52
Like, are you alright? You're

Speaker 1 5:53
really thirsty. He's like, Oh, it's a long drive. Like, all right, well, let's get home, get you settled, and, you know, we got a long day of cooking tomorrow. Well, the next day, it ended up being that my mother even noticed it that my son and he were kind of like queuing up to use the bathroom all day long. And I was like, what? That's a little unusual, but whatever, we didn't think too much more of it. Well, the next day, my brother in law, he was in such bad shape that he had trouble standing up, and the EMTs had to come and he did blood sugar test, and the Meter Reader was high. Like, just be like, hey, this one caps out at 500 like, oh, and I didn't almost know anything at that point, really about type one or type two. I just understood the glucose values were something out of range, for sure. So he ended up going to the hospital, and they ended up treating him. And a couple days, insulin dripped the whole thing and releasing him. So he was able to join us for Thanksgiving, but was obviously this kind of pale on the whole day. And it occurred to me that, you know, something might be off with my son, but I didn't know what it was at the time, and that night he wets the bed. And I think back, I said, Wow, this is like, the third time in two weeks, and it's like, this, this can't be, this can't be, right? This isn't someone gets sick. And, you know, wetting the vet isn't symptom of being sick in a classical like, I got an infection, right? Like a cold or something like that. I said, you just doesn't sit right with me. So especially after my brother in law's experience, and so I drove to CVS at 24 hour one at like 530 in the morning and bought a

Scott Benner 7:28
from the very beginning, your kids mean everything to you. That means you do anything for them, especially if they're at risk. So when it comes to type one diabetes screen, it like you mean it. Now up to 90% of type one diagnosis have no family history, but if you have a family history, you are up to 15 times more likely to develop type one screen it like you mean it, because type one diabetes can develop at any age, and once you get results, you can get prepared for your child's future. So screen it like you mean it type one starts long before there are symptoms, but one blood test could help you spot it early before they need insulin, and could lower the risk of serious complications like diabetic ketoacidosis or DKA. Talk to your doctor about how to screen for type one diabetes, because the more you know, the more you can do. So don't wait, tap now or visit screen for type one.com to learn more. Again, that's screen for type one com, and screen it like you mean it contour next.com/juicebox that's the link you'll use to find out more about the contour next gen blood glucose meter. When you get there, there's a little bit at the top. You can click right on blood glucose monitoring. I'll do it with you. Go to meters, click on any of the meters. I'll click on the Next Gen, and you're going to get more information. It's easy to use and highly accurate. Smart light provides a simple understanding of your blood glucose levels. And of course, with Second Chance sampling technology, you can save money with fewer wasted test strips. As if all that wasn't enough, the contour next gen also has a compatible app for an easy way to share and see your blood glucose results. Contour next.com/juicebox and if you scroll down at that link, you're going to see things like a Buy Now button. You could register your meter after you purchase it. Or what is this? Download a coupon. Oh, receive a free contour, next gen blood glucose meter. Do tell contour, next.com/juice box. Head over there now get the same accurate and reliable meter that we use,

Speaker 1 9:46
glucose tester. And I wasn't sure what to do. I didn't know what strips went with which device, you know, completely fumbling around. And just bought two of each. I was like, well, the two of these have to go ahead, you know, go together somehow. So I came back and. And I woke up my wife. I said, Look, whatever you do, don't let anybody eat or drink anything while I figure this out. She said, why? What's wrong? I said, Well, I just, I want to rule something out, because I'd done what everyone does. Probably at some point they web and do something, and sure enough, you put in the bed, wedding and the thirst, and it's, you know, one of the top symptoms that morning, we sat around the kitchen table, and I tested myself first. It was like 79 and then went to my wife, same kind of thing in the 80s. And then went to my son. It was 250 I was like, Oh, God, what do I do? Here am I said, No, it's got to be broken. Test, test again, and test the other kids. So we tested everybody, like two or three times, and his kept coming back in the mid two hundreds, and I kind of walked around the corner broke down, because I knew right down in there what it was, just given the symptoms and the scenario, and yet, I called the pediatrician's office and she said, Oh, what could be an anomaly? You should just head to the ER and rule it out. And I say, rule it out. I'm pretty sure we just ruled it in. Are you sure about that? Just tested

Scott Benner 11:01
everybody 33 times. I spent $197

Speaker 1 11:05
in test strips. Oh, my God, they're saying Yeah. It was like, Yeah. I think I spent 202 different machines with $100 of test strips each, because they only sold the massive packs or whatever. And I was like, No, I'm pretty sure that's what it is. And so that morning, we fed them, and then a lot of people might crane just said, let's have some breakfast before we go and before we go. And he had a bowl of cereal and a glass of orange juice, and then, like, you know, face palm, now that I know that we just sent him to the moon on the way to the ER. So we went to the ER, and we told him, I said, we're here for type one diabetes admission. And somehow, between that moment at the window and the intake nurse, someone put him in his type two. Now my son is almost five feet tall. Well, back to, you know, four and a half feet tall, skinny, eight year old kid doesn't quite fit the description. I know we're not trying to put everyone in a type there, but didn't really fit the what it might have expected. And so they intake nurse does another finger prick, and he's like, 575 say, Oh, God, what did I just do? And I'm looking at him, I'm like, you feel all right? He's like, Yeah, why? I don't understand. But I know this isn't good.

Scott Benner 12:06
Yeah, you caught it really early.

Speaker 1 12:10
We did, it turns out, because the flip side of that was he only spent about three weeks on regular MBI injections. We kept having to titrate down over and over and over again. Because for me, the horrific part, and you were actually one of the first people to respond to me, luckily enough, when I joined the Facebook group, was I said, I said, you know, I'm sitting outside my son's school every morning because I'm freaking out that he's going to crash low. And that's what would happen. We give him his food, his insulin, and within an hour, you know, he's in the basement, and the nurse has got him downing 35 4050, grams of carbs, and we can barely get him above 80. And it turned out that the honeymoon kicked in pretty quickly after the initial insulin, and we were just overdoing it like, you know, give a kid who's insulin sensitive and, you know, unit and a half, and you know, we're fighting. So he spent three hours a day in the nurse's office for the first two weeks of school. Was like this. I literally said to myself, I don't know how anybody does This is insanity, like, what is going on? And so finally, we met with our endo two weeks later, and she's like, Well, I'm glad you've been bringing down his insulin dosing. That's been smart. And we got to the point where she couldn't give him anything. It would just tank him. And we spent almost 10 months without him needing regular injections at all. The endos were confused, initially, thinking maybe Modi or something else, but we just caught his diagnosis, probably within the first three, four

Scott Benner 13:36
weeks, yeah. And then he had a really slow onset. He

Speaker 1 13:40
did. And when we had his antibody testing done, they did it right at the at intake. We didn't get the results for almost a month. He only had one antibody against zinc. And I was like, Okay, so maybe, maybe he doesn't have a normal onset. And sure enough, now we've gone through multiple antibody testing now he's up at three and we're on much more steady, but still inconsistent. Uh, honeymoon based, yeah, treatment. So like Pokemon,

Scott Benner 14:05
he's collecting them all. I'm gonna get all the antibodies before I'm done. Oh, my gosh. Well, how many other kids? Oh,

Unknown Speaker 14:14
this is what you'll like. I have four total.

Scott Benner 14:16
So does he have Are you done or, I mean, oh, I'm done.

Speaker 1 14:19
I told my wife, have as many kids as you want. I'm here for you. Oh, who

Scott Benner 14:23
did she have them with? No, no, I was just

Speaker 1 14:26
telling her. I said, You're in charge of how many you want, like my father's one to 10. Holy Hell, really? Yeah, I grew up with 45 first cousins. I mean, Christmas and Easter and all that stuff. Was always a massive house full of people, easily 100 plus people would come to every family event. Wow. Yeah, Irish, yeah, Irish Catholic. My dad married another Irish Catholic woman. So

Scott Benner 14:51
how many Michaels Are you directly related to?

Speaker 1 14:54
That's a great question. Probably at least seven at this point. Yeah.

Scott Benner 15:00
I say this as much as I can. My wife's father's name is Michael. He had a son. He named Michael. That man had a son and named him Michael. His daughter married a guy named Michael. They had a son. They named him Michael.

Speaker 1 15:14
Well, one of my in laws, same kind of thing. They had a Michael and then a Michael. And even the middle names were simpler, so the abbreviations are almost identical. And he's like, but I don't want him to be a junior. I'm like, wow, it's pretty close to being a junior.

Scott Benner 15:27
You're all by a letter. You're all juniors. So listen, this is the most distasteful joke, but when Arden was born, they asked us if we had names for babies, and I said, in front of my wife's family to them, not just in front of them, by the way, I directed this statement to them. I said, if it's a boy, we're gonna name him Michael. We love dad more than you, and then our last name. And everybody got so pissed. But I always just think that's what I mean. Isn't that what you're doing? All right? Just like, isn't it brown nosing, you know, I don't know. Oh,

Speaker 1 16:01
well, there. I mean, so after our first was was born, we chose some family names because we were frankly struggling with what else to do, yeah, like, wow. And my father's point was like, Oh, that's a very political choice of you. I'm like, what I agree. We took one name from one side of the family, another name from the other side of the family, and just kept doing that with all of our kids, and it was just because their names were familiar to us, though it wasn't. We weren't trying to earn family brownie points or anything, but that's, that's the way certain people took it, like that was very good of you. Yeah, honor the family.

Scott Benner 16:34
Nah. People get mad at anything. Kelly and I did the exact opposite. We took a when she was pregnant. Both times, we grabbed this big fat baby name book. Now a book, as you may know, is a grouping of paper, like bound together so that you can see words. And we would sit down every night, like after work, and we would read out I would read out loud a few pages of the book, and we would just go through, like, go through the A's, go through the bill. We kept going. We would just circle any names we liked, and then we went back, and then you'd be surprised. A couple weeks later, you'd go through and you're like, who put Aiden on here? No, like, like, that kind of stuff, like, you know, and eventually we just got down to call, we're gonna name name Cole. And then we did the same thing with Arden. And when people ask, like, who are they named after, we always say, like, I don't think I'm related to anybody, like, worthy of naming another person after not that, not that I know of. But anyway, all those Michaels out there making the world a better place. How many so these other three kids? Any chance they have antibodies? Have you tested them? We

Speaker 1 17:32
haven't tested them. There's some reluctance there. I mean, literally, I think we were home from the hospital maybe a couple days when T Z yield was announced by the FDA as being cleared, my wife and I were like, well, what do we do? Because if this really does delay onset, and some of the other kids have the antibodies, is that something we're willing to put them through. And then, you know, there's Facebook groups out there that have people who've gone through it, and it seems hit or miss too, and so we've not put our heads in the sand, per se. We're definitely aware of what, what's possible and likely in some cases, but, and you'll like this just as a stat, the reason why I juggle with it is, you know, they'll tell you, Oh, if family member has type one you're at, you know, 10 times increased risk of getting it yourself and then somewhere else, higher up in the statement about type one diabetes, say, and 90% of people who are diagnosed have no family history, like, not really sure how those two stats go together, where vast majority of people don't have it, relative, and then yet you tell them, we're at this massive increased risk. So I

Scott Benner 18:36
think they're making those numbers up. I also think I've heard people say 10% and 10 times. And I think, I just think they don't know which they were told. Like, I mean, and where does that number even come from? The back to that 10% 10 times. I've heard 5% five times. I mean, if there's data on it, great, like, but I mean, at what point are we just repeating something we heard someone else say? I mean, what I can tell you is that very frequently, there are other autoimmune issues in the family. That's a fairly frequent thing. I mean, I mean, I'll ask you, are there other autoimmune issues in your family? You guys gotta have celiac right?

Speaker 1 19:19
No. So that's that's been the interesting experience. So little tangent on that is, my mother is like a self taught amateur genealogist. Okay? So she ended up being for a while there probably had, like a top 20 contributor to ancestry.com Helping people put ancestry together. She traveled around, no kidding, the country she went to all the crap Mormons get. They have the best records. My mother would go out to Salt Lake all the time for church marriage records and that sort of thing. She'd come down near where I am, the National Archives. Same kind of thing. She flew to Europe a few times. So her experience was to document family trees for a lot of people. And so when my wife and I actually were married, she actually went back across my family, through my mother and my father, my wife's mother and my wife's father, as far as she could find records in two cases, they go back fairly far, probably almost 400 years in two family cases. And I said, Well, mom, after my son's diagnosis, who in the family has auto immune, or, even more appropriately, type type one. And I knew instantly after I asked the question, who she was thinking of. So one of her second cousins, I suppose, which is really, truly like once removed kind of scenario, both her kids have type one. So we had to go almost two and a half in family generations away to find a family tree component, a branch, if you will, that had type one in it. And that was just by sheer luck that we knew that and gave with them and we talked with them. This

Scott Benner 20:53
episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by the ever since 365 get 365 days of comfortable wear without having to change a sensor. When you think of a continuous glucose monitor, you think of a CGM that lasts 10 or 14 days, but the ever since 365 it lives up to its name, lasting 365 days. That's one year without having to change your CGM. With the ever since 365 you can count on comfort and consistency 365 days a year, because the ever since, silicon based adhesive is designed for your skin to be gentle and to allow you to take the transmitter on and off, to enjoy your shower, a trip to the pool, or an activity where you don't want your CGM on your body, if you're looking for comfort, accuracy, and a one year where you are looking for ever since 365 go to Eversense cgm.com/juicebox to learn more. I still find that to be close in my approximation, though, I think if we went and found a bunch of people who don't have any auto immune stuff, like none, and I think it would be harder for you to find a connection in their family. And this is me again, doing what everybody else is doing. I'm just guessing based on the things I've heard. I don't actually know anything. We have

Speaker 1 22:18
other issues in the family. I suppose that we're not really clear as to what occurred. Perhaps, you know, we had, I had an uncle who passed very young when I was in his 30s from a rare form of juvenile brain cancer, which, at the time it happened, everyone's like, we don't understand this. This cancer develops in like, two year olds to four year olds, and here's a 35 year old man with it. How does that happen? And so we, there's family as big as my father's, you're bound to run into, yeah, people who have challenges across the board.

Scott Benner 22:49
Well, I mean, by the time you get to your temp, you're probably using some beat up sperm to make babies with, I would think

Speaker 1 22:58
they were in construction too. So, you know that? Well, my mother once said, so my father was right in the middle. My mother once said, after my grandmother stopped having children, she's, you're actually a pretty skinny woman, you know, not, not trying to be offensive, but

Scott Benner 23:10
nobody knew, because she was always pregnant, yeah, 23

Speaker 1 23:13
years, right? It was like a child every other year for for 23 years. Wow, my oldest cousins and my youngest cousin said being, I think there's almost a 40 year gap. Now, wait, that's something. It's, yeah, it now everyone's like, so who's who's an uncle, and who's a cousin and who's an Easter and nephew, it's like impossible. They have

Scott Benner 23:31
a lot of longevity, or a lot of them alive. Yeah, most of them are, wow, that's pretty

Speaker 1 23:36
much my bunch of my aunts and uncles made it into their their eldest now in their late 70s, actually, early 80s.

Scott Benner 23:43
God, now I think about it. So you could have an uncle in their early 80s that has a brother or sister in their 60s. Yeah. Wow. Jeez. All right, so when, when the diagnosis happens, what's the reaction in your family? Because you listed here in your in your notes to me that you'd like to talk about family reactions, and you said it was pretty far ranging. So what did you see and how did it impact you? Yeah,

Speaker 1 24:08
that was an interesting one for me. It kind of put me into therapy in a good way. I mean, I needed to process what was going on. I'd never done that personally. And so for me, I was, I was shook pretty hard, and I dove into it the only way I knew how, which was, as my therapist said to me, you know, you have this illusion of control, which is a very real symptom for people. And you know, he said to me, Brian, you made it 40 plus years with the idea that you were in control of anything. And this changed all of that because kids used to say, Oh, you're doctor, daddy. Why? Well, because I caught a lot of things. So for example, kid had pneumonia. We were struggling to figure out what it was. I watched the doctor diagnose it. I said, All right, I need a stethoscope. I have a stethoscope. I need a pulse ox. I got that too. And they're like, Well, why are you doing? I said, Well, I have four kids, and. And when we have problems, every time I come to pediatricians office or, you know, urgent care, you guys do the same, you know, six or seven tests every time to, you know, help establish a baseline. I said, I can do that at home and be better directed. So I used to have this idea that I could, you know, more or less figure it out. And then everything was always an acute issue, right? Type one being a chronic life, long thing. It was a total loop for me, and I accepted it by buying books. So I bought most of the books everyone in the Facebook group shares and others, maybe not so much, and threw myself into reading. So you were laughing that you know much of a reader, perhaps, but I'm a history major, so for me to pass history and get a major in it. You know, I read 1000s of pages of books a semester, if not weekly. So for me, reading was really easy to go through. So I read through a lot of the books of management, you know, the science of it, and I was accepting of it. And as much as my wife is currently, today, involved and engaged. She was a bit in denial, actually a lot, in denial that what occurred occurred, especially after he rolled off insulin. After that first month, it was kind of a it wasn't the whole idea of he's healed. It was more of a, well, his body is doing something on its own here. Let's not overthink it, and just take every day as it came. So you know, I was doing the crazy man thing, which is planning for the future. She was doing the rational thing, which was just do every step, one foot in front of the other. And if today doesn't need insulin, today doesn't need insulin. So those reactions were very wide ranging. And then same with my kids, my son's reaction, he usually at chronic ear infections. I have my whole theory as to that was part of the problem is that he was always in blamed from various foods that he would eat, that he doesn't eat now, but none of us eat now, stuff like fried foods, seed oil, for example. I don't mind if it's butter and that sort of thing, but like, we took him off all that, and he no longer gets ear infections. But he was good for two or three a year, easy. His response at diagnosis was, you know, laying on the ER table getting his first two injections. Was, well, so how long do I have to do this? Like, 10 days. Because he was thinking, you know, amoxicillin, that kind of thing, yeah. And the nurse kind of looked at me like, I don't know how to respond to that. Like he's asking how long he has to do these injections. And I kind of looked at him, I said, Well, only I could think of at the moment was for as long as you need to, until they're secure, and we'll just do it every day. As it happens, that was one of these. He looked at me, goes, well, what does that mean? Well, for a while, and it could be years, I don't know, but for right now, it's going to be every day. And he cried for maybe 30 seconds, and then moved on. I mean, the kid is resilient. That's again, reaction there being pod changes don't bother him. Sensor changes don't bother him. He did his own injections. I don't I don't know how he did it. It used to scare the crap out of me. My doing it right or wrong and that sort of thing. Yeah. And then my eldest daughter, she Dad, you're so so upset all the time. Why you're so sad? That's like, well, because your brother's facing this. And she goes, Yeah, but he's not doing anything any different. So here's another child observing that really grateful for that. She doesn't want to treat him any differently. She doesn't treat him like he's a glass object ready to break at any moment. She still beats up on him. Not that I enjoy that, but you know, again, another reaction. And my youngest, he's also got another sibling that's really close. So back to your thing about parenting. My two middle kids are 13 months apart, so one was born in summer, and then for Christmas, my wife dropped a pregnancy test in the stocking. Said, surprise. You know, well, we got one in diapers, followed by another one on diapers nine months later, and

Scott Benner 28:50
your dad's like, you're not going fast enough.

Speaker 1 28:54
Pick up the pace. So yeah, there's only six years between our four kids, so it's a pretty tight go out. But okay, my youngest was just like, she was kind of quiet about the whole thing, in awe, and she wanted to know how she could help. You know, little five year old girl at the time looking at her big brother. So it was just really interesting to see how no one really wanted to treat him differently. But I was like, trying to throw a protective bubble wrap around him, and it ended up being not the wrong thing at the moment was for me, it wasn't so much for him, right? I guess that's the best way to put

Scott Benner 29:28
it. You're still trying to figure out a way to stop all this and be in control of it,

Speaker 1 29:33
right? And so I realized, you know, I just can't. And so one of your favorite sayings has helped me a lot, which it's interesting to see a lot of the static thinking and in the healthcare setting, because we go to large Children's National Hospital, and one of the original big wigs in pediatric endocrinology runs to practice, and we've not ever met with that Endo. But I came up with all our basal settings. I came up with all of our Bolus settings, our insulin to car BA. Sensitivity, all that stuff, because listening to you mainly, and the podcast, and all your contributors, like Jenny, that sort of thing, the books as well. And I was like, Well, meet the need, right? And so, I mean, right now, while he's honeymooning, some people may be pulling their hair out. I've just had to roll with it. He needed four and a half units yesterday, and I think he's already up to four and a half units today. Like, I can't tell you why. It's not like, it's a major change in his food intake. It's just some days it's like, whoa, dial back to basal and dial back the amount we give him at meal time. And other times it's like, whoa, we didn't even put a dent in this. Like, what on earth is going on? So I've learned to just let go and let it happen and respond to it, because you'll drive yourself absolutely crazy into therapy like I did, trying to figure it out.

Scott Benner 30:48
I hope when I say that, I hope people like take it the way I mean it. Because I always worry that when I say meet the need, that it feels like an increase statement, but it could be a decrease statement. It could be whatever the need is, just meet it. Don't. Don't overthink it. Don't, you know, don't go, I don't understand. Why is it less today? Why is it like, who cares? Just just match the need with the resistance of insulin that that's required and move on. It's so weird. Like when you said a second ago, you're like, there's this saying you have the bot that that helps me, and then you kind of went into your story. It's so interesting to see what strikes certain people and how it ends up helping them.

Speaker 1 31:30
Oh, it does. So I'm in my analogy that that matches up with that is so I'm in sales and high tech software selling to enterprise and government, and

Scott Benner 31:41
that history degree really came in handy. When people ask me, what do you do with a

Speaker 1 31:45
history degree? I'm like, I don't know, whatever you want. I sold shoes at Nordstrom when I was, you know, in college to help pay for it. Afterwards, I was like, Well, what do I do with this? Went to go work on Capitol Hill, and they don't pay anything, by the way. People who are dedicated on the hill, that's a they're not doing it for the money, at least the members might be, but people work for them, definitely not. So I moved here to do that, and then decided to be in in software sales, because I understood technology Well, I'd love to tinker. I got in trouble with the FBI one time. Wait,

Scott Benner 32:16
hold on, you got in trouble with the FBI one time.

Speaker 1 32:21
So the Digital Millennium Copyright Act was just passed when I was in college, and I was doing, you remember Napster? I mean, wow, we're going back. Of course. There was alternatives to that for video and media and other things, software, etc. And this was, gosh, we're gonna go off on a tangent here. So my best friend's father was an intellectual property lawyer, and I'll never forget after I graduated, and this whole thing with the FBI stopped and whatever, and he said, your generation was right to be angry at the music industry. And I was like, that's not why I did it. It was free. I like, I was confused. I'm like, I wasn't thinking about it. But he's making the point. I spent $22 on that album listen to one song kind of felt like a rip off. And that's where the iTunes thing took off. The FBI thing was because I was, I was sharing huge volumes of pirated movies that had been ripped off of Hollywood Studios by insiders in Hollywood. Have you set up a server? Yeah, I was, I was one of the biggest sharing groups in the US at the time. It wasn't me personally, it was a group of us in a fraternity that I then went and hacked the school network, took all the firewall rules off and all the other fun stuff that stopped us from sharing. And, you know, I kind of had personal control of the network. This was the early days of a lot of cyber security. It wasn't very good. So, yeah, I had fun with it. And, you know, we'd literally that night, I'd be like, what do you guys want to work watch, right? And we'd go download something before dinner and come back, and by nine o'clock, whatever movie anyone wanted to watch, we downloaded it. And so that's that ended up being a problem for me, because the FBI traced my P Jess back to the school, and then from the school, they figured out where it's coming from, they sent this massive letter. It actually went home to and that's where my father was, like, you he wanted to kill me. You know, you're gonna risk everything. I said, Well, I laughed. I said, they didn't catch me for like, 99.9% of the stuff they found, like an Adobe installer file or something, you know, completely innocent, like, literally none of the stolen stuff. It was just the when I say stolen stuff, I mean, like, the pirate ape stuff that people were sharing. It was a legitimate file that I'd actually saved in the wrong file. Like, upgrading it and, like, okay, yeah, sure, I'll delete that file. And from there forward, I never did it, ever again. It was one of these, wow. That was a closed brush with with reality. Just,

Scott Benner 34:35
was it like a seasoned assist, and you just cease to desist, exactly, right? Yeah. You know, it's funny people like nowadays, I don't even think movie going to the movies doesn't have the same vibe as it used to, obviously, like you're talking about sharing films that weren't even released yet or or were literally in a theater, and young people listening don't understand, like a movie would come out in June, it would stay. In the theater for six months, like, like, you know what I mean? Like, it's not like right now, a movie comes out in a movie theater and, like, three weeks later you can watch it on like, Max or something like that. That's not, it wasn't like that. So you were, in their mind, stealing millions of dollars from them, if, if you were making it free, but you're lucky you didn't go down for that.

Speaker 1 35:19
Oh, here's, here's the the, I don't know. The funny part of the whole thing is, most of these movies were actually taken from the studios themselves by employees, because you'd get their screener discs. So if people have never seen Oscars from a while ago, the Oscar discs that they'd send out anytime they wanted a vote for given actor, actress, at least. This is what I was told back then. This could have evolved since then, but the disc itself for the scene they wanted someone to be nominated for. And these were always in the movie screeners that we downloaded at the bottom, it would scroll for your consideration in big block, white lettering. And they were like, what's that for? I'm like, the guys at Paramount, or the guys at whatever, thought this was the scene the actor should win Best Picture for, right? And people like, Wait, isn't this in the theaters now I'm like, yeah, they're already pushing, like, who should be nominated for something, and the Oscars aren't for six months, right? So the part for me that I was like, Look, this is just one big circle, like the studios are not paying their people well enough. They're not protecting your own property well enough. It's all being shared freely. I don't know what you're supposed to do. And, you know, I was a kid, and it was like, Hey, I just type in a word, and I find the movie and I download it like there was no, there's no limit, right? Same thing with the music, and

Scott Benner 36:34
you're not making money off it. It's all swagger, right? It's all just because I can, yeah, and it

Speaker 1 36:38
was all, it was all one of these things where it was all built on idea of the more shares you have, peer to peer, networking took off, right? And that's where the whole process just was, the more you share, the more you had access to and the more people downloaded from you, the higher your rating. It was just like Facebook before Facebook, how many shares you have, some likes, that's, that's, he's a good source of material. And,

Scott Benner 37:00
you know, just that was that crazy. No kidding.

Unknown Speaker 37:03
So I turned that somehow into a sales career.

Scott Benner 37:06
Well, I see the Connect. I see the through points, but and they let you graduate the school didn't make you bigger. Oh no kidding. Well, the school, the school, understood

Speaker 1 37:15
what we were doing, and we weren't, by any means, any violator anywhere. It was happening all around the country, and at the end of the day, everyone figured out how to shut it down. They went after the people who created the platforms, which is what they always do. They don't go after the users. They go after the dealers, right? The dealers are the guys that made the tech, like the guys that founded Napster and these other products that said, You got to stop doing it. It's making it too easy for piracy. I mean, I knew deep down at the end of the day, I said, this really isn't wrong, but it's so easy. So what are you going to do? But it taught me a lot about how how to talk to people around the technology, because people wouldn't understand. How did you do this? And I realized it was just a series of stepping stones, right? You just had to start questioning and start doing and start dabbling, and then you'd build on that experience. So it put me in a mindset of technology has to be conquered one step at a time. You don't become an instant expert, just like with what you do. I mean, I look at you and the way you talk about management, and I said, My God, what he's so confident. Clear. He knows what he's doing, why he's doing it, and if doesn't go as planned, doesn't bother him. I was like, that's the 10,000 hour rule, which, in a technology world, a lot of people know it, which is, you're an expert. After 10,000 hours, you can't really learn a whole lot more.

Scott Benner 38:26
Yeah, my secret to how I how I think about diabetes, is that I don't think about it any differently than I think about anything else, like I run my life the way I run diabetes. So I learn things I once. I know they're right. I do them. I never look back. I never question things once they work. And you know, if something goes wrong, you just wipe the slate clean and start over again. Like there's no reason to beat yourself up. There's no reason to overthink something has been thought through a million different times, like, this is how insulin works. You know, just use it like that. And if something goes wrong, there's a variable at play, you know, you can look back later and try to find it if you want. But in the moment, the moment passes, and so now you're in a new moment. Just go back to doing things the right way again, and it just works. Like everything works like what I say, something incredibly inflammatory. Life is really easy if you let it be most of the time. Like, where it gets difficult is when you bring other people into it, because they have their perspectives and ideas and what's important to them. And when that doesn't mesh with you, that's where things become. That's where they say. You know, relationships are are difficult, right? Because you have a way of thinking and somebody else has a way of thinking, and now you're trying to co exist without pissing the other one off too much. But if you just kind of put yourself in a white room with diabetes, you get your settings right, your pre bulls, your meals, you. Pay attention to implications like fat, protein, exercise, you stay flexible, you meet the need. You don't argue too much about why what's happening is happening. If you get stuck on that, you get stuck forever. It's like stepping it up, but a tar pit, you know, now you're now you're here having this argument. There's no answer to forever and ever and ever. So just don't step in it. Just go past it. And it sounds like that. It's funny, because the way you talked about going through the technology and figuring out the peer to peer and the whole bigger idea, that's really very similar. The only place you got stuck so far it sounds like is in the unreasonable idea that you could somehow impact this for your son in a way that's beyond you know what the natural world will allow? Does that make sense?

Speaker 1 40:51
Yeah, I, I mean, I, I feel myself happier today than I did when I used to tell people, I don't have a care in the world. Like I used to look back the summer before the diagnosis were really three weeks, three months prior to that, one of the businesses I was in, it's part of the reason why you do high risk startups is private equity came in and and bought the business and hey, like, that's nice little lump of change. Let's have a little vacation. So we took two weeks to go to the beach, something we wanted to do as a family for a while, and we so we did it. And I remember thinking, literally, I'm like, oh, life can't get any better than this, and blah, blah, blah, but I was still always on edge with kids still learning to swim. Two youngest were still running around the pool. I could not relax. Lots of other components, like, we'd go skiing. I grew up skiing in New England, teaching them to ski. It's like, oh my god, they're gonna careen off the trail and hit a tree. Like, literally, my mom would always race to the worst possible outcome of whatever the enjoyable event I was supposed to have, you know, like, the waves gonna take him out at the beach and sweep him out. I'd have to go save him. Like, save him. So I was never really capable of just letting go. And then once the diagnosis happened, I was like, I just I can't live like this. I have to let go and just let to your point, life happen. Just go with it. So

Scott Benner 42:15
there's nothing wrong, in my opinion, there's nothing wrong with being prepared for those ideas. It's being stuck in them. That's the problem. Yes, I

Unknown Speaker 42:22
was certainly stuck in them. Yeah, that was my problem. I

Scott Benner 42:24
once, I was having this conversation once with my brother in law, and I said, Wait a minute. I said, you have a two story house. And he goes, Yeah. I said, you don't know which window you jump out of if there was a fire and you couldn't get down the stairs. And he goes, what? And I said, one of your Windows is a lesser of evils. You don't know which one it is. And he goes, No. And I said, I do. I plan for stuff like that. He goes, you plan for what you'll do if your house catches fire and you can't get down the stairs? And I was like, I mean, plan is a strong word. I gave it 20 seconds of thought. I know which window I'd go to,

Speaker 1 43:00
yeah. I mean, I had the little ladder roll away, ladder tucked under your arm as you walked into the second

Scott Benner 43:05
story. Well, that's my in my mind, having the ladder is a bridge too far, but knowing which one goes to a little rooftop that would let me, like, kind of tumble down on the ground and probably not break anything, or put me in a position where I could make it longer till somebody got there. Like it's not a thing I've ever thought about since then, but I did think about it for four seconds. I'm freaked out when none of you think about anything. I'm also freaked out when you can't stop thinking about it. Like, I understand the kids don't swim, we're going to the beach, so we're going to pay attention. But after I've had the thought, then I execute it, I don't worry about it. Like, that's where, like worries, a waste of imagination, comes into my mind. You are genuinely making up a story about a thing that very likely won't happen, and then you're guarding against it. So do you have anxiety? I don't anymore, but you did, most certainly did. You gave it away for your son.

Speaker 1 43:56
I did. Yeah, I had to be able to enjoy life. I had to let him feel that it wasn't a barrier to him. And if he's watching his father constantly worry over every little thing, he's going to wonder, is there something I need to be worried about? And the reality is, you know, he's he was starting to transition some of his care to him, and he's gotten better with it. But, like, I didn't want him to see the anxiety that was very obviously on my face, like I was not eating. Well, I lost a ton of weight. When I say a ton, it sounds like a huge amount to lose, but I probably lost 30 pounds in two and a half months because I had to force myself to eat like I was just so anxious. And my wife one day was like, get a hold of yourself. And I was like, Yeah, I need to well

Scott Benner 44:41
she No, I'm not laughing. I'm just trying to imagine, if I told my wife to get a hold of herself, what would happen?

Unknown Speaker 44:49
Well, it was, it was warranted because, oh

Scott Benner 44:51
no, it would be warranted if I said it to my wife too. I'm just wondering what would happen if I said you got a hold of yourself, my wife would beat. Me with a stick and then leave me and take everything, get a hold. It was, that's

Speaker 1 45:06
where. That's why I said the reactions were so helpful. Like, I overdid it and she kind of underdid it right. And we both had to get to our, our balance and our where we were both at peace with like, hey, like, I'm accepting of

Scott Benner 45:18
it. Did you both find level is she, did she rise up and you came down?

Speaker 1 45:22
Yes, okay, yes, yeah. And she's still probably calmer about the whole thing than I am. Well,

Scott Benner 45:29
in fairness, Brian, you're worrying about it. Why did two of you have to worry about it? Well,

Speaker 1 45:33
no, that, hey, you know what that's that's probably a fair way to look at it. Um, we settled into that role a little bit like we still have. We still have, we still haven't been able to use any of the automation stuff, because he's just like, every day would be different. It's just not. You're not up to automation yet. Yeah, we're thinking at some point we'll be able to, but his needs are just too highly variable still. Yeah, so, so I'm the automation. That's me, but I enjoy it because I look at it from your perspective, which is, if I can better begin to see the patterns that are there, maybe some of them are imagined, and I just lucked out. But for the most part, I take it the way you look at it, which is, you know, it, it's very real in most cases. And I'm not tinkering with settings. It's more about responding in the moment to what's going on. But that process, she's slowly coming around to like I told her, Hey, listen to Scott. And I gave her the old beginnings and Pro Tip series said, listen through all of these and we'll be able to have a better conversation about what we're doing. She do that. Did it help? Oh, absolutely, I'm glad completely understands now, like yesterday, my son, we went to watch her voting day, I guess was yesterday, right Tuesday. So a bunch of schools were closed, so I took my son to have her he went to go watch her play a tennis match, and at the end of it, he's like, Dad, I want a cheeseburger. And I was like, I kind of was rolling my eyes a little bit, like these fat bombs, and just like whatever, you know, it's good. Let's go ahead. So we went ahead of cheeseburger. And, you know, this giant thing? I was like, God, I don't even know what the car count is on that. So I said, we have to wing it. We have to eyeball it, and we have to be ready to respond. And I let him make the judgment call. What do you think that is? And thankfully, I He did it on his own. I didn't do this at all. He's, I guess, to your point, like Arden, he overestimates it, not by a lot, not where I'd go, oh no, no, no. But he does more than I do. And I'm like, All right, let's go for it. I think he was only above like 180 for maybe 30 minutes. But of course, it came back three hours later, there was that rise again, and my wife said, Oh, the fat rise and the proteins going on, like, we need to knock it down. I didn't even see it. She saw it before I did. And I was like, we would not have been able to have that conversation. Earlier on. She'd have been like, I don't understand what's happening. What do we do? And there'd be freezing paralysis, like, and we'd watch it probably keep going up. Also,

Scott Benner 47:57
then there's an assumption you did something wrong, because if she doesn't know enough about it to understand that other impact, then the idea is, well, you guys just didn't Bolus well for this. And that's the thing that people get, forget you and your wife. But people get frozen that if they don't know the other implications, then they just go to, I did something wrong. And sometimes people shut down. You know what I mean? Instead of like, not everybody lurches forward. Some people just go, oh, I suck at this. And they kind of collapse. And then they sit with their 300 blood sugar forever. Yeah, I

Speaker 1 48:26
had that conversation with our, I guess, our our nurse practitioner that we see more than we see the end of and at one, back and forth over our they use a lot of electronic communication for the easy stuff. I say, Hey, I'm trying to dial in his ratio. And I made this change. She's kind of like, well, why did you do that? I said, Well, if I give him this much, he drops too far. This is how we ended up getting on a pump. Was he needs? We have to do things in temp of the unit on a regular basis, because trying to keep a tighter range. You just for his insulin sensitivity, like even a half unit will move them 80 move them like, 80 points. Yeah. So if he's at like, 130 I'm like, so we did this for a while. I'm like, All right, Rory, go grab your favorite whatever, ice cream, sugary thing. It was, like the idea you gave you'd Bolus for a juice box before sports like that way, if it doesn't work, just down the juice like, so we were always trying to match how much we could kind of catch it before it would drop, knowing that it would help bring him down. But not all the way down. We were doing this, like, feed the insulin thing. I'm like, This is insanity. Like, he doesn't need to eat an extra 500 600 calories a day in mainly carbohydrates and glucose related stuff, just so that I can bring them down to a number I'd like to see in that Yeah? And she's like, Well, okay, I see your point. I said, so can we get the Omnipod please? She's like, alright, you, you clearly have comfort level with this that most people don't. So yeah. And we had, we had it, like, three days later, but that was after a lot of trial and error, yeah. And that was my. First experience of trying to figure these things out on my own. I said, Ah, first confidence boost, right?

Scott Benner 50:04
I think for sure, when you are trying to make small adjustments like that, MDI is is harder, you know, like it's just there's all you can't get as fine with the amounts, and there's more poking. And did you think your wife just didn't want him to have a pump, or she just didn't feel like she knew enough about it right away? Like, so she saw your comfort with it, and thought, okay, that's fine. There

Speaker 1 50:29
was some level of resistance to the idea. But then, when I explained to her that, you know, when he has, like, his favorite breakfast, he has eggs and these two Kodiak waffles that he loves, like a unit ends up being a little too much, and half units not nearly enough. So we were, we were doing, like, split balls and constantly just trying to figure this out. I said, Hey, imagine we do this now with an extended Bolus, and we split the ratios. And then, you know, now he's not 225, going into school at, you know, 830 because the Bolus still hadn't hit from the second one. And, you know, and so it took this whole process, and she wrapped her head around the idea of, if you don't like his number going above a certain number, not that we need to make a number good or bad, but just what are we shooting for? Target wise, it's easier given his dosage. Needs to do it with a pump. And then when my son figured out that he only needs to put it on every three days, he's like, Oh, I'm in. I'm in. Okay? Because, you know, yeah, he'd do six or seven injections, maybe eight a day, just, you know, with everything he ate, and it didn't bother him. But he was kind of like, it's such a production. Like, lift up the shirt, Bob the area, so grab the pen, prep the pen, like he was doing all of that, because he would actually tell us, Mom, I can insert it without any paint. You believe me be and I was like, oh, okay, so he's, he's ready for this.

Scott Benner 51:58
Let's see about a pump. Yeah, well, it's, that's pretty great. Actually. Hey, I've decided on what I'm gonna call your episode, and it's, I'm gonna name it after the book I'm reading right now. That sounds fun. And as a history major, I feel like you're gonna know what I'm reading.

Unknown Speaker 52:13
It's called meditations.

Scott Benner 52:17
I don't know that book. Oh, it's a collection of Marcus Aurelius is writings.

Speaker 1 52:21
Oh, that sounds fun. Yeah, I actually have a book called hubris sitting on my desk, which is all about kind of the the pomp and circumstances that leave up to war and why wars typically don't go the way that people who start them think. And there's some, there's some uh, Roman battles of that book as well. I believe you

Scott Benner 52:45
haven't read it yet. Apparently, he used to sit down at the end of the day and just write down random thoughts, and they're all collected in this, uh, in this book called meditations. So and I feel like this is what we're doing with you right now. Like I feel like we're just hearing about the things that at the end of the day you were like, This is my takeaway from today. I'm gonna build on tomorrow with this. And I don't know anyway, that's my inclination.

Speaker 1 53:13
I like it. I I've my father used to quote the Beatles to me about that, which is life is what happens to you while you're making other plans. I think that's roughly the quote. He was a Beatles fan, not me, but I was always making lots of other plans. This obviously was not in, and I don't think type one's in anybody's plans. But that never really resonated with me until after this, actually speaking, going all the way back to one of your earlier questions about how people responded my parents, when I called them from the hospital room. I said, you know, Rory has type one. My father's response was, oh, everything will be all fine. And it took me about two weeks, but I called him back after I said, That's the absolute wrong response. I needed from you at that time, I needed someone to empathize with me, sympathize with me, just be present in that raw emotion of it sucks. It probably feels really shitty right now, and that's what's going to happen for a while. And I didn't get that, and that's where I was really grasping. So my heart goes out to all the newly diagnosed on a regular basis, and those are really, generally, the people I almost always respond to on the Facebook group, which is, you know, I've been in your shoes. It does suck, but just the longer on this component, my favorite podcast episode of yours is when you It's titled, I think the time I decided to share that put me at ease when I first heard it, because it puts the Scott today and the Scott of when you were not really newly diagnosed, but about as far back as you you would share those two pictures of you. It's kind of like newly diagnosed Scott struggled too, right? Like it's, it's no secret, but it's, you know, we're so far along in your podcast, I think some of that gets lost on people. But I was like, yeah, there's some really big gems in the background that you can say, hey, if Scott can. Be who he is today, and Arden can be the one she is today with this for 20 years. So can I, you know, why can't I, like, I'm listening to this person basically talk like an expert, but it didn't start there. No one starts there. And

Scott Benner 55:13
maybe, maybe I can let go of some of the angst that exist during the process too. I would hope, I would hope people can do that a little bit like just, I mean, not that the feelings aren't real, but that you don't have to live in them for so long that you can go, You know what? This is probably gonna pass. I have to tell you my favorite Beatles song. That's a message from a title is, let it be. I find that like a chant, almost when I listen to it. Just, there's so many things that happen, and they all seem so important, and you feel like there's something to do all the time, but the truth is that most of the time, the best thing to do is nothing, just let it be. I know I take a lot of comfort out of that. Usually, yeah,

Speaker 1 55:55
it's a good point. It's something. Occasionally I get a little jumpy on corrections, and my wife will look at me and she'll kind of say, Hey, can you can you give it one or two more Dexcom readings see if this is really a trend? And I would say probably 80% of the time, she's right. She's she's a good governor on the process for me, because otherwise I'm like, Cool. Overdid that. And then I got a text, Hey, cut the basal back and, like, we gotta make up for a little aggressive over correction. So she's a good governor on the Let It Be part two, which is sometimes you gotta let the decision you made play out and not second guess yourself, because then you'll just drive yourself crazy. Yeah,

Scott Benner 56:32
sometimes you need to see the process happen. It's not so much about controlling the number as it is seeing what your impacts did so that you can make better decisions. And I mean, listen, I've had, you know, back when I would, you know, texting Arden, when she was younger, I'd be like, temp basal increase 30% for an hour, and then five minutes later, I'd be like, shut that off. And then

Speaker 1 56:54
all the time, well, not to him directly, but when he's home, I'm always like, Oh God, I'll walk, you know, back into the bedroom, 10 minutes later, back. Well, don't need that temp, basal,

Scott Benner 57:03
temp, basal, the other way. Now, what we went too far. Do, uh, do 10% but for 45 minutes now, and like, it's fun to joke about, because it felt like such like these wild over corrections. But I'm telling you, the experiences were important. Like, I'm telling you like to see it happen now. Now it allows me, in present day, to say, I don't like this 170 blood sugar, but I see what's happened in the past here with this. You know, the algorithms pushed insulin, or we Bolus or something, and I'm reasonably sure that this 170 is going to be 90 in an hour. So I want to put more insulin in because of the number, but I got to trust the process, and I can trust it, because in the past, I've not trusted it, and then I've learned from it. So I think it's all important. But in the end, when you get to your zen place, and this is not just about diabetes. You sincerely apply this to your personal relationships, your jobs, how you feel about people driving in traffic. Often the best thing to do is nothing. I mean, if you can leave with more than that today, you've done really well, but most of the time you're just you, what's the the cooking saying? Right? Like, you just you touched it too many times and now it sucks, or something like that. Like, I forget what that idea is like. Just stop fiddling with it so much. Let it be what it is. I don't know. I find that getting up people get upset. I think if you just walked away from this, never thought about it again, it would go away. But instead, we're gonna spend the next six months being mad about this, you know. So anyway, I run my life on some very basic ideas. I run diabetes on my basic life ideas. Most of the time, things go on. Am I perfect? I'm not. Do people all agree with it. They don't. You know what I mean, but it works. It's working pretty well. Arden's alive. She's thriving. I just talked to her last night on FaceTime. She's at the end of her quarter. She's about to finish her sophomore year in college. She's sitting in a lab with a friend she made who somehow has diabetes like the first in person my daughter made her first in person friend with diabetes in her life when she was 20 years old at college, and she's never once known a person with type one personally in person, she has one online friend and one in person friend who has diabetes, and they're working together, and they FaceTimed last night, because they're, they got an extension on something, and they were, they seemed like very happy for a minute, so that, I think they face time to be like, we got an extension, And they're so relaxed and laughing. But yet, in the past week, they've both done all nighters, three nights in a row, nobody's had like, a crazy low blood sugar. They're managing themselves. It's nice, you know what? I mean, like, so I don't, I don't begrudge you your drill downs and you're over involved. Yes, and I'm really impressed at how you let them go. I'm sure plenty of people are like, how did he just let go of that anxiety? I'm going to assume you went to therapy. Is that how you did it?

Speaker 1 1:00:10
Yeah, I did. I did it with therapy. They were things that I had to accept, because the therapist would say to me that a lot of the anxiety was really a reflection of probably things that I had to acknowledge when I were younger, and so, I mean, I had to have a conversation with my parents. I said, Is there a trauma in my background that I don't know about? I mean, I had to be very serious about that. No, no, no, I know what you're talking about. At the end of the day, there was maybe not so little things, but they definitely had an impact me as a young, young kid, that it kind of had me put up walls around certain things that hadn't really face down. And through therapy, it was one of these, look, there's there's ways that you can respond to certain pressures in life, and just have to make that choice, and I'd been making the wrong one, essentially, very guarding, and I had to face them head on. So for me, a lot of it was, I had to be more upfront with what I was actually feeling. So I think, to your credit, in some ways, like not that you don't have a filter, but you don't like you you're speaking your mind, and you're very clear about that. I think there's a lot of people who don't like to speak their mind because they're afraid they're afraid they're going to upset somebody, when, in reality, there's something you're trying to work through, and there's maybe a communication gap between you and the other person, and someone might take offense, but there are ways that you can learn to talk about them and say, Look, this isn't me being offensive. This is me having an honest conversation about what I'm experiencing, what I'm feeling, and I hadn't really done that, you know, Were

Scott Benner 1:01:42
you mad at your parents or something because your debt, your reaction to your father was angry?

Speaker 1 1:01:47
It was, yeah, the reaction with that is, he's an on again, off again alcoholic. Oh, and so when I say that it's, it's he, he realizes that he's a much better person when he doesn't drink, and he's atrocious when he does and I don't, not physically at all. It's verbal it's terribly verbal abuse in more of the attempt to be funny, that's the painful part of the whole thing. It was not mean to be mean. It wasn't saying anything vicious, but it was just barbs and jabs like you wouldn't say that if you hadn't been drinking. And I noticed this, and I said at the end of the day, I said, I just the people who should, in your mind, love you most, and not say those things or saying them like I had to square up with that. And it was experiences as Kid where that was like something you'd see at the dinner table when the family would get together, is who can be wittier than the other person. And it almost invariably devolved into a rose peeking at each other. Oh yeah, the full roast thing. Could you imagine what Tom Brady just went through in this Netflix thing? Like, oh, it's

Scott Benner 1:02:46
fantastic. I loved it.

Speaker 1 1:02:48
I mean, I was like, Wow, you really have to be open minded about doing that. But imagine that, instead of those being comedians hired to pick at you, it's your closest friends and family. And suddenly that may not feel so good. So yeah, roasting constantly. They would cross the line a lot. I never acknowledged that, that that bothered me immensely, because I married into a family that doesn't do that at all. Oh, those people, they treat family, yeah, those people very differently. And you can be light hearted, but like, there's things you just like, Listen, I

Scott Benner 1:03:17
love humor. You can't be light hearted and humorous. It has to hurt or it's not funny. And your point is, you don't need your dad doing that to you.

Speaker 1 1:03:26
Right? Your your jerseys through I'm from Northern Jersey originally, so, like, I'm definitely familiar with the jersey approach to stuff New York City feel. But, yeah, it was, but for me, it was one of these things where he didn't drink for 20 years. I didn't know he had this problem until after I was growing

Scott Benner 1:03:40
Oh, no kidding. Your dad hid drinking from you through your first 20 years of your life.

Speaker 1 1:03:45
He didn't hide it. He'd quit cold turkey. Oh, he'd stopped for that

Unknown Speaker 1:03:49
long. Stopped for

Speaker 1 1:03:50
that long. I had no idea my father was the he's he'd go to a party, and it was, I just knew my dad is, he'd have a coke on ice. That was all you'd ever drink.

Scott Benner 1:03:57
Your dad was white knuckle on it through his whole life with this, yeah, for sure. No kidding, how about that?

Speaker 1 1:04:03
And then after my brother and I moved out of the house, I think he realized, for whatever reason, that he thought he could, you know, ease his way into it. And nope, so he's done the rehab thing twice, and it hurts now because he's got grandkids. I might do you want to spend a lot of time with him, like, I don't know what to tell you, like, what motivations you need not to pick up a drink you can't stop. So for me, it was facing that down. And people may say, Oh, I have problems in my life too, and I face it down all the time. But like for me, it was an unaddressed issue that, you know, if you idolize somebody and they're they're your rock because you saw them operate a certain way for 20 years, and then suddenly they're vulnerable, they're a mess. They're all these other things. It's like, well, my anchor point just flew off, like, I don't know what I'm supposed to do now, the person who I would have expected to drive down and, you know, stay at the house with us for a little while. You would never trust them to operate a vehicle. We

Scott Benner 1:04:53
have family members. Our kids have never been in a car with and we told them you can't drive our kids. So. Don't ever like if it ever falls that way, just know that you're not allowed to drive my kid somewhere no matter what. And we had to say that when we were pretty young to somebody, it was hard, yeah. But again, I don't really have trouble saying stuff like that to people, so no,

Speaker 1 1:05:15
yeah. And as it should be, though, like, that's, that's the thing that I had to do, is I had to learn to take the governor's off on the hard feelings, yeah, again, not to insult somebody or hurt them, but to make sure that I wasn't left in this anxiety ridden ball of, you know, what if? And that freaked me up, because the other option was medicate myself. And I talked to a few friends who'd done that, and they're like, it feels like you're driving somebody else's body. It's, it's really weird. It works. Like the anxiety goes away, but it's, it's they didn't, in their experience, think that going the SSRI route and others was was worth it to them. I got a prescription, looked at it on my desk, and said, If I go down this route and it works, I'm going to think that that's what I need my whole life. I want to try addressing the other underlying issues first and see if that works. Because if nothing works, then, hey, maybe I do need it. Like, I'm not judging at all. If you need it, you need it, yeah, but I decided that I would go the other way with it. And for me, it was, what summarizes it up is I used to come home every day from work, and then I'd say, all right, made it through another day. The kids are a little bit older, and I used to say to myself, well, at some point they'll all be old enough for like, it's not stressful. So I used to kind of do that to myself. I was like, because we had so many young kids, you know, under the age of six or seven. So for a long time, everything was, I mean, I've been to the ER on the same day with two different kids for two different injuries, with the same ER doctor looking at me, like, would you forget something? I'm like, nope. Here for a different reason, different kid like, that's that was kind of the chaos in the house.

Scott Benner 1:06:44
Were you finding problems that didn't exist? I thought they asked you this earlier, and I never did.

Speaker 1 1:06:49
No, I never, I never found problem that didn't exist. Okay, you know, it was, if it was an ear infection, it was an ear infection. If it was, you know, pneumonia, it was pneumonia, the flu, the flu, that kind of thing. So I never invented issues. But like that day of the ER trip, a friend of ours had given us one of these little sticker books for little kids. And my one daughter left it open, and my youngest, who was two at the time, put the stickers in her mouth, and they were these kind of hard plastic foil back things that, oh God, like, whoa. Like, so my wife is she hears her gag, and she's like, What the hell. So she's like, swooping out, and she thinks she's choking on it. And we're like, how many stickers were there? And we're like, we have no ideas. We've at this point, we're operating with the idea that maybe she swallowed one. And I'm like, Well, if it's sticker made of paper or plastic, no big deal. But these were, these were hard, like, we were thinking this might be a bit large or something, yeah, or get stuck. So we drove the ER, and the ER doc was was listening. There was no whistling, and he's no but we'll do a chest X ray, because he's like, these things will light up on a x ray machine, no problem, because they're made with some foil lining. It all came back clear. So in order to celebrate the ah, you know, we dodged whatever we went to the local park, and we're working on my older two daughters bike riding skills. And my second daughter wanted to try riding around the park with one of the training wheels off, following her big sister and I rode with them. They hit the brake. Oh, slow it down. Like we did this five or six times. And then the second time out. I was like, sit down, relax. They got it. I sat down and I watched her, and she's my speed demon, like risk taker one, no breaking. She keeps picking up speed. I'm like, Oh my God. She tries to make a turn, goes right over the handlebars, nearly hits the big post, goes down hard, and I hear crying, so I run to the other side of the field, and her arm is bent at a 35 degree angle. There's no bone sticking out, but you very clearly tell it's broken. So the day that was supposed to be relaxing for me, after the chaos, go back and the ER doc, like, oh, you forget something. You were just here three hours ago. I'm like, No, and I show him the arm. He's like, What the hell so,

Scott Benner 1:08:59
buddy, I told you, there's no sticker in the kid. What is wrong with you? No, no. Different kid. Different problem. Hold on, exactly. Oh,

Speaker 1 1:09:06
my look on his face was shock, like, oh, oh, you're serious. And then they had to do the standard thing with Child Protective Services, not because they were worried about us, but it was one of these two, yeah, kids on a bike, and were you wearing a helmet? And so these are all that stuff, and that kid's tough too. I mean, all my I said, all my kids are tough, but she, she never really was in too much pain throughout. And then, if you've never seen a kid on ketamine, it had a bone break set. It makes their eyes kind of go screwy. And I looked at my wife and said, I can't stay here for this while. They set the break. You have to do it. And now my wife worked in the medical field for 10 years as a rep, and she'd seen brain surgery, spine surgery, hips, like all sorts of stuff at a military hospital being worked on. So I was like, you have the fortitude for this? I do not. And so she stayed and watched him set the break. But she's like, Yeah, I don't ever want to watch that again either, because when it's your own kid, it's you don't disassociate you. Of that. So that's

Scott Benner 1:10:00
painful. Hey, listen, I, in case I forget, if you don't watch the entire Tom Brady roast, I'm not talking to the people who are listening. At least listen to Nikki Glaser, Tony Hinchcliffe and Sam Jay. They were particularly funny. Yes,

Speaker 1 1:10:15
Nikki was, yeah, wow. It just, she

Scott Benner 1:10:19
was just, she's her cadence is almost perfect for that stuff. Really fantastic anyway. And and to Tom Brady, who's now saying this didn't go the way he expected it to, or whatever bullshit he's talking about right now. Like, stop it, man. What'd you think was gonna happen?

Speaker 1 1:10:34
He didn't go to the after party. I'm like, Are you surprised? No,

Scott Benner 1:10:37
that I don't that I wouldn't go to the after party. He looked dazed at points, and with that plastic surgery, what I'm assuming is plastic surgery, he looked a little extra crazy at some points. But no, I thought those three comedians were hilarious. So if you're looking for an insight into what I think is funny in a roast situation, those three got me maybe, maybe Andrew Schultz, but I thought his cadence wasn't great, but I liked a lot of his content anyway, not the point, Brian, we've done a thing today that I think of as masterful. I asked you one question, and we talked for an hour and 15 minutes. That's perfect. There's other questions on here. You on your list here? Said family reactions, which I think took us through a great story. You did talk about your therapy, letting go illusion of control. You got through that. You talked about community a little bit, and how to support people and what they need in those situations. Maybe I yeah, maybe we did. Okay, actually. Well,

Speaker 1 1:11:36
there's, there's one thing I would add about the community part. Go ahead and I think it's, interesting, prior to my son's diagnosis, I'd only known one person prior to that, a good friend of mine, his wife, was diagnosed late in life, and that's kind of all I knew, and she lived a perfectly normal life and didn't think anything of it. One of the things that really helped me was finding people to talk to quickly. But one gentleman in particular did something great for me, and this is what I think everybody might need, which is he kind of represented what I envisioned my my son to be. And it's not unlike the story you had recently with another one of your guests that when she was diagnosed at 12 and she found herself later on with with someone else in the ER with her said, Oh, and you're perfectly normal, like, I kind of needed that experience. So a good friend of mine introduced me one of his best friends growing up. And he's like, oh, oh, your son is type one. Don't worry about it. I'm like, What are you talking about? Job? And he said, Well, you got to meet this guy, Tommy. I said, why he goes well, he was my best friend growing up. We did the JDR fund walks together. We went to college together. We played sports together. He's got a family. He's kids. He lives down the street. So I went and met him, and we had an hour and a half long conversation, and he did everything absolutely normal and nothing unusual about any of it. And he showed me off his Omnipod, and he said, Brian, I've been dealing with this for, you know, 28 years, and, you know, just got the Omnipod five. For me, this is about as close to a cure as I think I'll ever really need, because, hey, it helps minimize the risk for me, but I've gotten really good at this. And I was like, Oh, that's really interesting, great technology. And at the end of the night, as we were walking out of the restaurant, he turns and looked at me, because I know what you need. What's that? He goes, you want a hub, don't you? And I said, Yeah, dude. And I looked at him, and I said, you know you I have to look at you and say, That's what my son is capable of being and doing. Is his own grown man with his own family. And this won't prevent any of that, like I needed to see that in the flesh for whatever reason. Yeah, and it still gets me, and you say it on your podcast too, right? You will meet somebody, and I got a chance to see that as an embodiment in the flesh. And so for me, that community sense of and I still talk with Tommy on occasion. He's always asking how things are going. So it doesn't need to be this constant everyday thing, but there will be somebody you may meet that just if you can make them your spirit animal. That's what I call them anyway, and I joke about it, because they can be for me anyway, the reflection of my future son, right in that respect, or future daughter, if someone doesn't have the son that's diagnosed, right? And it doesn't have to be massive or impactful in that way. But for me, it was, it was almost freeing, like I don't have to think of my son as challenged or limited in any way, and and here's a person that I can relate to like that. So that's what it meant

Scott Benner 1:14:18
to me. So much of this path is having something that you can look to as aspirational, really important to have hope and a goal that is tangible, that has been embodied by somebody else already. That makes sense, absolutely, yeah, that's very, very important, because in the moment it all does feel terrible and insurmountable, and I'm different or broken, or my kid isn't what I thought they were going to be. And then people sometimes can be inclined to give up. You know, when they when they feel like, when they feel like, the aspiration is gone now, like. Know, then what's they're left to do, and why would I be trying? But that's just, it's just so patently not correct. I mean, I've talked to people with significant health issues on top of type one diabetes, who are maybe some of the happier people I've ever met in my life. Yeah? Well,

Speaker 1 1:15:16
you talk to the gentleman who's blind by his kind of mismanagement, by his own admission, just, you know, but got married, has kid, he's on the forums. And I said, Hey, I don't know how to contact you, but loved your episode, because, my God, the outlook you have on life, that was very freeing for me. You had another woman, I think it was Gloria, same kind of thing, you know, she's in her 70s, and it's like, I love horses, and she just decided to kind of move off into be with horses. And it was like, so for me, it was, hey, these people aren't at all saying it's a limitation, and for a long time, the medical community always wants to treat it that way. And that hurt most was that's kind of again, to your and I'll say you have a dislike of it, but the approach matters, right? They don't really know how to say it genuinely, because, unless they, as an endo, live with type one, how you're really supposed to take it seriously about when you're not living with that limitation, you know, that's like the guy walking around talking to someone you know, with inability to walk say, hey, everything could be fine. It's kind of like, kind of a weird, disjointed way to try to convince me, because you don't live with this, like, what am I supposed to

Scott Benner 1:16:20
do? What made you mad about your dad's statement isn't, I think that it was unfeeling, it's that it was unfounded. Like, and the thing he could have offered you, you know, I know you needed empathy in the moment, but like, at least that would have been honest from him. You know what I mean, like, it's going to be okay, from a person who doesn't really know if it's going to be okay is infuriating to me. It falls on the same level as God only gives these things to people who can handle it. Anytime anyone's ever said to me, God gave Arden diabetes because they knew you'd be good at taking care of it. I want to punch them in all of their faces with all of my hands, because the inference is that there's a God, first of all, and he looked at me and said, Hey, you're a thoughtful person. I'll give your kid diabetes. That doesn't make any sense to me at all. I understand the overall feeling I get what they mean, but the way you say it is really important. Do you know what I mean? Like, there's, oh, I do. There's another way to say something, like you can, you could pass that sentiment to me in a way that would be comforting, instead of a way that's infuriating, that goes for a lot of of different things. Hey, listen, I'm gonna, I don't usually do this at the end here, but here's a PSA, from me to you, if you grew up with alcoholic parents, go to therapy.

Speaker 1 1:17:39
Yes, yeah, even if you don't know until later in life

Scott Benner 1:17:42
for sure. Yeah, there's so much impact that comes from alcoholic parenting onto children, and there are probably a dozen things you do with your personality that you would be much happier without, and they all stem from your parents being drinkers. And I know that most people don't believe that, but wait, man, I see it over and over again. Go to a therapist and say, hey, my parents were drunks, and I need help, and a year later, you're gonna feel a lot better. So that's from me to anybody who cares. Yeah,

Speaker 1 1:18:16
well, the coup de gras for me on this whole thing of like, kind of letting go was, you know, I've done the big corporate America thing for a long time. I've done startups as well, all Silicon Valley kind of things, and it's been enjoyable, and I've learned a ton along the way, but I never really felt like any of it was mine. It was always working for someone else's benefit. And so you whether you call yourself an entrepreneur or not, you are, and you're doing it your way and the way you want to do it, and at some point, you may or may not retire on it, you know, God bless. Hope you do. But you know that's that's up to you or not. I can't tell it's up to you how far you take it, but I went so far as to say I have money in retirement that's sitting out there. I don't know what life's going to look like in 25 years when I can finally touch it. So I liquidated it and I went on a opportunity to go buy my way into a small business or start one, because I wanted to be in the here and now. I wanted to be more present in my kid's life. But more importantly, I wanted to be able to say, hey, but that's mine. Like I work on that with passion and enjoyment, like you do. I mean, I think people, if you listen enough, I mean, you clearly love what you do. It motivates people, hardest working people I know are also the longest lived people, not saying too much, but they love what they do, and I've stopped loving what I do, generally speaking, just being a salesperson for someone else. I said, Well, let me see if I can turn this inward and do something with it. Now I'm not telling people to liquidate your savings. There are ways to do it. I happen to have a cousin in the business that does these business startup where your retirement money is tax free. And it sounds like a scam, but it's not. It's called rollover for business startup. It's part of the IRS tax code, but essentially, you can tap your retirement savings early, so long as you don't benefit your current self for your future self. Big. Unquote there with the IRS. I said, You know what? Old me would have never taken this risk. But at this point, I'm like, got it all this stuff that's happened in the last few years. Screw it. How long are you going to

Scott Benner 1:20:12
I'm 42 okay. Oh, it's an early, early in life to come to that idea. Well, listen, I'll answer a couple things. You said I My goal is to do the podcast for 10 more years. I think I can. I mean, forget. I think I can. I could easily do that. It's all about if people still care to hear from me, if they care to hear from me, they'll listen. If the numbers are right, advertisers will buy ads, and then I can make a podcast. That's my goal. I hope it I hope it works that way. I'm putting my fingers in other things, a little bit with AI, with diabetes and some other stuff like that, that I think will help people now and after I'm gone and I stopped making the podcast, but my wife asked me the other day, in a really, like serious moment, she said, I say I'm gonna go record now. And she goes, you ever get tired of it? And I was like, what? She goes talking to people, is it exhausting? And I was like, oh, it's like, the best part of my day. And she's like, really, because my wife's pretty introverted. You wouldn't know it about her if you met her, but she's a fairly introverted person, and I think the conversating, it exhausts her a little bit. But this is the best part of my day, like getting to know you, but moreover, letting you tell your story, giving you a platform to tell your story on, and then to recognize that with some a little more work that I can share it with a bunch of other people, and then this experience that you've had listening to the podcast, somebody else gets to have it from you. Like, this is the building like you're a building block, Brian, you know what I mean? Like you're a building block of the podcast. Like, I started off going, Hey, this is my story, from my perspective, that the time I decided to share, I think is episode like two,

Unknown Speaker 1:21:48
right? It's early on, yeah, I think it's single digits, for sure.

Scott Benner 1:21:50
That's me just sharing, right? And then I meet a person. A person comes on, they share their thing. We build, we build, we build. Today. I think I put up episode 1200 and something today, 10 years from now, my expectation is that this is already a compendium of diabetes information, and now we have the ability for these large, large language models to absorb the text from the podcast and actually be able to like thoughtfully, go through it and and regurgitate it back to you in ways that are astonishing. Actually, before we go, I'll do this. Hold on a second.

Speaker 1 1:22:29
By the way, I'm in the AI space, so it's it. I'm following along what you're doing. I know who you're working with.

Scott Benner 1:22:35
Oh, do you really? Oh, that's crazy.

Speaker 1 1:22:37
Well, I mean, I saw, I saw when you request early on. I was like, Oh, I know him, but connected with him on LinkedIn for a separate reason, but so

Scott Benner 1:22:45
well here, let me show you. This is fascinating. Sure. Who

Speaker 2 1:22:50
is Scott Benner? Scott Benner is an author and diabetes advocate known for his book, Life is short, laundry is eternal, Confessions of a stay at home dad and his podcast, Juicebox podcast, he shares his experiences as a father of a child with type one diabetes and offers insights and support to the diabetes community. Watch

Scott Benner 1:23:11
this. What does he say about pre Bolus insulin?

Speaker 2 1:23:16
Scott Benner often emphasizes the importance of pre bolusing insulin on his podcast, he explains that pre Bolus helps manage blood sugar levels more effectively by giving the insulin time to start working before eating, this approach can help prevent post meal blood sugar spikes, making overall diabetes management smoother. Have you tried this method, or is it something you're considering for your podcast discussions?

Scott Benner 1:23:41
Anyway, there's nothing you can't ask this thing that it doesn't know about. What I've already said, it's fascinating.

Speaker 1 1:23:47
Yeah, it's amazing to do that. I'm so glad to see you do it.

Scott Benner 1:23:51
So that's open, AI, right? The thing that I'm involved in. Now, I just heard from the Creator last night. Here I'll read you a text from him, very quickly, the Pro Tip series has been integrated into vision. It is really awesome. I've been testing it right now. The responses combine visions, default reasoning with Juicebox knowledge. It can cite specifics if you ask for it, like say to it, which episode is this from? And even, hey, what timestamp could I find that at it goes on and on. But basically, not only can you ask it to provide you with key takeaways, like from an episode, but if your diabetes information is connected to the service, you can say, provide me with key takeaways from episode 1000 tailor the takeaways to my specific situation. Arden's account, which is the one I mess around with, is attached to her night Scout, so it knows all of her bolusing and all of her settings and everything else. Like, this is insane. Like, so, like, I was very concerned that I'd make this podcast for however long I made it, and it would have the impact on people that it had on you and your. Son and your family and other people like that. Then one day, I just would stop making the podcast, and it would just, it would just dissipate into the air, and it would really like, I know, but that's hard for people to think about. But if you don't make content, you don't know this flame on a stone, stone stays warm while the flames on the stone. You take the flame away, the stone gets cold. It's over. It dies. That's it. If I stop making this podcast, all the information dies with it, and so I had to try to find a way to keep it alive after I can't feed it every day. That makes sense, so I

Speaker 1 1:25:29
get it. Yeah, internet is not forever. A lot of people think it is. But having worked at a large internet firm, like at some point, stuff does fade away, and based on the way the algorithms and other things work, I mean, it's a perpetual motion machine. So if you're not moving, I get that entirely. This

Scott Benner 1:25:44
is 1000s and 10s of 1000s of hours of of real conversations that now we have a computer model that can pick through and then regurgitate it back to you like a human being. It's a repository at this point. So I'm trying to treat it like it's a, you know, like it's a library, as you should, yeah. So anyway, that's what I'm trying to get

Speaker 1 1:26:06
to. Well, the technology under that, the retrieval, augmented generation, I think, is what he's using in that process to limit the AI generation, to just the content you created. Is stuff I work with in government all the time where, like, hey, like, we have 80 years of building code. We need to update it, modernize it, help people be able to query it. Like builders, like, hey, what's the amount of square footage I need in order to, you know, not have to use a bathroom or add a bathroom in a giant office setting, etc, like that. Conversant process with AI is getting better and better every day. Yeah, well, we tell them, you don't even have to do anything crazy, like you can plug into existing models like llms from Google and chat GPT open AI, but if you generate internal like, but here's the data I want you to use from and only pull from and limit the model response to what's in it. It really doesn't hallucinate very much. I think that phrase gets used a lot, but it's not trying to make stuff up at that point. It's being directed to use the content, right? That it's it's working off of so it'll get better and better. I mean, I've seen some really, really wild stuff working in the space that I'm in now, where it's like, oh, that's an incredible use case, but like teaching people how to be more empathetic. Caseworkers was one I was just recently involved in where using intonation and voice modulation analysis, like, Hey, do they sound as well as saying the words that actually show empathy? Like, or do we have someone just going through the motions, right? And it's like, yeah, AI can now do that kind of stuff. Now it needs to be centered on that content. But I have really high hopes for you, and I think you're doing an amazing thing doing that because, gosh,

Scott Benner 1:27:46
I mean, wait till I, wait till I ask it to create a quiz that from the content that will help people broaden their understanding. And then once it creates the quiz, tell it to use the quiz to set up a course to teach the answers to the quiz. And that all happens in like a split second. Like, that's the kind of like, even the building code stuff. Wait till it gets calmed down and somebody thinks to say, Hey, can you identify redundancy in this code and things that we can eliminate? Yep, yeah, boom. And then the building code gets easier to understand. Of these codes, what really doesn't have an impact on safety, and it's stuff that people don't have the time or the I'm gonna say bandwidth, but I don't mean bandwidth like time. I mean bandwidth like actual intelligence to absorb the larger problem and to understand it and then spit back something like people don't have the bandwidth to go through things that are that big. You're gonna fix healthcare with this. You're gonna fix everything by being smarter and having a bigger memory base to work with while you're juggling all the different variables of a problem. And I'm not saying just like tell the machine to fix it, but you know, once it gives once it gives you suggestions, then you can have human beings sit down and go, Oh, wow, here's the here's the 20 years of thinking it would have taken me to get from A to B. Now we're at B. Now let's go back and be people again and reassess this. I see endless possibilities for this. So anyway, I'm, I'm super excited for it. Um, let me say goodbye to you, because at this point I I'm gonna have to ask you for 100 bucks so I can help. I can afford to edit this around. Yeah, poor Rob. Like Rob. I'm just, I'm just messing around. Man, don't feel bad. You're, you do a great job, and you're, you're paid very fairly. I'm not upset by how much I sent you.

Speaker 1 1:29:40
He does great. Your remastered series worked out so well. Like, it's not that it was bad, but, like, you can tell a difference. If you go back to the very beginning podcast, where it is now, you're like, Oh, right. Audio quality, everything.

Scott Benner 1:29:51
I'll tell you a secret. If you listen back to the last year of the podcast that Rob has edited, and then go the year back before that, you'll see there's finite. Little decisions and gaps and ums and things like that. I probably sound smarter today than I am because of Rob.

Speaker 1 1:30:07
Well, I've noticed that there is no dead air. So kind of back to my comment about, you know, who was a radio personality would have succeeded in their build major radio for sure, because you can go on, I don't wanna say forever. It's not, not a knock, but you seem to be willing to engage with the audience constantly, which is a necessary trait all of this. But yeah, I've noticed even when people respond, I was like, Wow, this starts to feel, not negative way it was good before, but like, there's another level of polish and professionalism that like, ah. And I get this now because I hear it with your Medtronic series. I hear it with others where the Q, A, it doesn't feel disjointed at at the same time, I almost know there was an um or a pause there. I'm sure of it, but it flowed so well. So he's done a really terrific job. He's

Scott Benner 1:30:52
wonderful. Let's not be too nice to him. He'll put the price up, but um, no, he lost the price. Yeah, I can't afford that. Like Rob, whatever insecurities you have. You have to hold on to at least 50% of them, or I can't afford this. But no, he's really wonderful, like and I'll have to have him on someday to talk about his theories about how he edits the show, because it's really interesting. When he tells me about it, he's made it better. He's a part of the process, and nobody would even know it. So anyway, all right, hold on, Brian,

today's episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by the ever since 365 the one year where CGM that's one insertion a year. That's it. And here's a little bonus for you. How about there's no limit on how many friends and family you can share your data with with the ever since now, app no limits. Ever since, Arden started using a contour meter because of its accuracy, but she continues to use it because it's durable and trustworthy. If you have diabetes, you want the contour next gen blood glucose meter. There's already so many decisions. Let me take this one off your plate. Contour, next.com/juicebox Did you know if just one person in your family has type one diabetes, you're up to 15 times more likely to get it too. So screen it like you mean it one blood test can spot type one diabetes early. Tap now talk to a doctor or visit screened for type one.com for more info. Thank you so much for listening. I'll be back soon with another episode of The Juicebox podcast. The episode you just heard was professionally edited by wrong way recording. Wrong way recording.com. You.

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